


Born to Be Wilde

by Berserker88, JackofMinds



Series: Born to Be Wilde [1]
Category: Zootopia (2016)
Genre: Absurd Amount of Original Characters, Action/Adventure, Biker Wolves, Bikers, But Seriously It's About Nick, Caning, Card-themed Nicknames, Chatting & Messaging, Comedy, Crime Fighting, Crime Scenes, Crimes & Criminals, Defenestration, Disco, Drama, Evil Laughter, Family Drama, Family Feels, Family Issues, Gen, Good Lord Family Issues, Handicapable, Interspecies Awkwardness, Interspecies Romance, Judy Hopps & Nick Wilde Friendship, Lies, Major Original Character(s), Mariachi, Minor Original Character(s), Murder, Mystery, Non-Consensual Tickling, Organized Crime, Original Character Death(s), Original Character(s), Other Dumb Nicknames, Others Ship Them Anyway, Poor Room Service, Psychotropic Drugs, Public Nudity, Real & Scary Guns, Skunks, Strangulation, Things Blowing Up, This Fic Stinks, Ventriloquism, Wolves, lucha
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-08
Updated: 2019-06-10
Packaged: 2019-06-23 15:12:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 28
Words: 203,294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15609039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Berserker88/pseuds/Berserker88, https://archiveofourown.org/users/JackofMinds/pseuds/JackofMinds
Summary: Only a few weeks after joining the ZPD, Nick Wilde is already confident that he's become a brand new fox. But as a mysterious group starts taking out the biggest criminals in the city, he suddenly finds himself pulled in two different directions by his new life and his old. Unfortunately for him, only one can win out in the end, and the other will be erased forever.





	1. A Shiny New Nick-el

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember when I mentioned that a recent movie had stolen all of my attention? Yeah, it was Zootopia. Not very hard to guess was it? I could gush all day about how much I loved the setting, and the themes, and the characters, and the writing, and, well, everything, but that's not what you're here for.
> 
> The ending of the film left many possible avenues open to explore, but the one that intrigues me the most is the background of deuteragonist Nick Wilde, and how that background conflicts with the very different lifestyle he ultimately chose to pursue. Let's hope I can do that premise the justice it deserves and get on with this thing.
> 
> This story is a collab with fellow author and 'fanfic buddy' Mind Jack, so be sure to send some kudos his way as well. :)
> 
> Cover image by zooijiness
> 
> Disclaimer: To those of you reading this for the first time on A03, some of these notes aren't going to make much sense. That's because this fic is a relic from over two years ago being recreated here for you just now, so I guess all of us missed the bandwagon there. The good news is that there are 22 more chapters of this bad boy coming at a MUCH faster rate than those peons from two years ago got them. After that, God help us all.

**Chapter 1: A Shiny New Nick-el**

_Tundratown_

_Halibuts Café_

_8:43 PM_

"Why is he calling me  _now?_ "

The aged raccoon glared down at the phone ringing in the pocket of his jeans. He was seated at one of the restaurant's outdoor tables, huddled up in a brown aviator jacket and enjoying what  _was_  a very nice dinner of roasted tuna and a light wine. But he had hardly gotten three bites in before his peace was interrupted. He hoped in vain that it was perhaps just some nosy telemarketer, until he pulled the phone out of his pocket and looked at the caller ID:

The Count

Growling to himself, he reluctantly answered the phone and put it to his ear. He didn't even  _like_  these damned modern electronics. Why couldn't anyone just talk muzzle-to-muzzle anymore? Mammals hadn't been given the gift of speech just to squander it on cheap plastic toys.

Sadly, he wasn't able to vent these frustrations properly, as the one who had interrupted his dinner and provided him with this digital nightmare also happened to be his current employer. "Good evening, boss," he greeted pleasantly, changing his tone in an instant.

As he listened to the voice on the other end, he slowly reached for his fork. Lifting it off of the table, he looked back hopefully towards his unfinished meal. His employer was notoriously long-winded. Maybe he could get a few more bites in before-

"What? No, I'm not busy." He stabbed the fork into his fish with more force than necessary. It twisted slowly inside the cooked tuna while he pictured a very different animal underneath. "Oh, you want to hear what I've dug up? Right now?"

He sighed. "Very well." So much for dinner. He reached inside of his jacket and pulled out a small file, making sure no one else was watching him. If he really wanted to be discreet, he would've just left the restaurant entirely, but that wasn't happening. He kept his voice low as he opened the file just enough to look inside and view its contents.

"Target is an arctic shrew who goes by the name of 'Mr. Big', likely alias, real name unknown. Raised in Little Rodentia by his grandmother, he started out running a small-time business of tuxedo rental shops. He quickly clawed his way to the top of the food chain and now officially owns several businesses across Zootopia;  _un_ officially owns several others. Most profitable is Tundratown Limo-Service, 'the ride you can't refuse'. Current heir is his newly-wed daughter Fru Fru. What's that? No, I don't see her being a problem."

The raccoon smirked, closing the file and patting a sizable lump in his jacket. "I gotta say though, this guy sounds serious. He's got eyes everywhere and a gang of vicious polar bears at his beck and call. I'm honestly not sure if I can pull this job off. On paper, it sounds crazy."

He groaned at the response, wiping a paw down his face. "Yeah, yeah, I've heard the phrase. From you. Like twenty times." At this point, he stopped bothering to fake politeness. "Just tell me what you want me to do."

Leaning back in his chair far enough that his foot touched the cold ground, the raccoon sipped at his wine and waited for his employer to finish. As he was given the last of his instructions, his ears perked up. "Hmm, not bad. That might actually work." He sighed again, louder. "Glad to hear you're as humble as ever, sir. Just give me a couple minutes and I'll be right on this."

He hoped that would be the end of the conversation, but his boss still had one final request to make of him. His expression hardened and his wine glass slammed down onto the table. "No, I haven't forgotten. I know what's at stake here. I assure you, by the end of the week, you will have Nicholas Wilde."

A sudden chill ran through the air.

"Anything else? Thank you, I  _will_  enjoy my meal, sir." He paused. "Wait, how did you know I was-?" The phone beeped off.

"Hmph." Shoving the thing back into his pocket, he finally pulled another chunk out of his roast tuna and brought it to his mouth.

He scowled. Cold. Of course it was.

* * *

_Rainforest District_

_1955 Cypress Grove Lane_

_6:32 AM_

Nicholas Piberius Wilde was many things. He was a fox, an entrepreneur, a devilishly handsome male specimen, and until recently, a professional con-mammal. But one thing he was not, and would  _never_  be, was a morning person.

"Come on, heat up already," Nick groaned, watching the coffee machine do its job at a speed that would make a sloth jealous. His home wasn't exactly what you would call neat, or organized, or presentable, but it was home, and that's all that mattered to him. Dressed only in a pair of white boxers, the fox had padded his way over rough carpets and strewn clothing to the kitchen the moment he got up. Coffee took precedence over everything else.

He blamed biology. Hypocritical as that sounded, there was no way that him having to down three cups just to keep himself out of bed could be anything other than his nocturnal instincts yelling, "Sit, boy! Lay down!", to which he responded, "Not gonna happen, I'm a cop now."

A cop. Now  _that_  was one label he never thought could apply to him. If someone had told him just a year ago that he would ever be wearing that uniform, he would've laughed in their face. If they told him that he would be best friends with an overly-eager and somewhat naive bunny, he would've laughed even harder. If they told him that he would be _both_ , he would've stopped laughing, because mental illness isn't funny.

It felt like an eternity before he got the rest of his coffee. He guzzled the drink down as quickly as he could and lumbered into his shower. Any drowsiness left in him at that point was promptly washed away along with whatever filth was stuck in his fur. He shook the water off, dried himself, a process that took a lot longer than you'd think due to his bushy tail, brushed his teeth to a dangerous gleam, and then finally set about actually getting ready for work.

There was a time when his morning routine used to be simple. He'd wake up whenever, get ready whenever, then go out and meet Finnick whenever, to do  _what_ ever. As long as he made a profit by the end of the day, he never complained. Even now, he still had to occasionally remind himself not to grab one of his tacky Pawaiian shirts out of the closet and instead pull out his shiny new police uniform. He then had to look himself over in the mirror and smirk at his own reflection just to make sure this was still real.

New uniform, new life, new Nick.

"I don't care what anyone says, I can totally pull this look off." Nick glanced down at his phone and frowned. "And if I want to  _keep_  pulling it off, I better get my tail down to the precinct." After looking himself over one last time, just to make sure his coat was nice and shiny, Nick beelined it for the front door and made his way out, closing it behind him.

"Oops, almost forgot."

The door opened again, and Nick's paw reached back in to grab his shades off the counter.

* * *

_Savannah Central_

_Zootopia Police Department - Precinct 1_

_7: 26 AM_

With a new life came new lessons. After only a few weeks on the force, Nick had already learned several:

1.) Never take the ZTA to work. Being the first fox cop means way too many weird stares to be comfortable with.

"Thanks for the ride, Lou!" Nick called back to the moose in the cab as he walked out, leaving a generous tip as usual.

Strolling casually through the front doors of the precinct, Nick immediately found himself the center of attention anyway, but he couldn't help it if he was just  _that_  irresistible. He made his way to the front desk, exchanging greetings and slapping paws with every officer he passed on the way.

"Hey there, Wolford!"

"How's the family, McHorn?"

"Still hanging in there, Delgato?"

2.) It doesn't matter how out-of-place you are. Be everyone's best friend, and sooner or later, they'll warm up to you.

Finally reaching the desk, he looked up at the chubby, crumb-covered face of Benjamin Clawhauser and smiled cheerfully. "Hey there, Benji. Seen Carrots around?" Clawhauser swallowed the last of his bowl of cereal, and opened his mouth to respond. "Wait, let me guess. She's already waiting in the bullpen, and in fact  _has_  been waiting since before anyone else even got here."

"Um...yeah," Clawhauser replied, probably wondering why he had even asked in the first place. Trade secret.

"You got my blueberry cricket deluxe?"

"Oh,  _do_  I!" Now on a subject he was intimately familiar with, the giddy cheetah reached into his box of donuts and handed one of the pastries to Nick.

"Perfect! You're a beautiful feline, Benji. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise." Clawhauser giggled to himself bashfully as Nick bit into his donut.

3.) Being a stereotype is better than being hungry. Donuts provide a very convenient breakfast option, especially when you don't have to pay for them.

Stretching his muscles a bit, Nick padded down the hallway towards the bullpen. Whether she realized it or not, Judy could use the company.

As he reached for the doorknob, he happened to glance through the tinted window, just able to make out a rabbit-shaped grey lump sitting by itself. He smirked. Might as well have a little fun to start the day.

He took a moment to clear his throat, putting on the deepest voice he could manage, then slammed open the door. "TEN-HUT!"

The reaction was instantaneous. Judy's ears shot straight up and her paws snapped to attention, one going to her hip and the other to her forehead in a firm salute. "Officer Hopps reporting for duty!"

He couldn't help himself; Nick doubled over laughing on the spot. When Judy saw who had actually come in, she hopped off of her chair and promptly smacked him in the nose. "Nick! Are you trying to give me a heart attack?!"

"Sorry, Carrots." Nick wiped a tear from his eye. "I'm not the chief yet. Maybe someday though, don't lose hope."

"You jerk," she muttered, though he could tell by the look on her face that she was amused herself. "Just sit down already before the real chief grills you."

4.) Officer Judy Hopps not only took her job seriously, she was determined to make sure her partner did as well. With mixed results.

"Like that would be anything new." Nick walked over and squeezed into his shared seat with Judy. It was an arrangement that some found odd, but no one really questioned anymore. Least of all Chief Bogo, who always knew where to find them.

"You're not allowed to eat in here," Judy said, eyeing Nick's donut.

"Correction: I'm not  _supposed_  to eat in here. Technically, there's no rule against it. Believe me, I checked."

5.) Always know exactly what you can and can't get away with in a police precinct.

Actually, he'd already learned that one long before now.

"But if it really bothers you so much…" Nick stuffed the entire rest of the donut into his mouth. "Pwobwum sowved!"

"I'd rather you didn't talk with your mouth full either." Some mammals were so hard to please.

As Nick struggled to get the food down, the rest of the force started coming in, getting into their own morning antics all around them. Frankly, he didn't know what Judy was complaining about, he was one of the quietest ones here. Thankfully, he managed to "dispose of the evidence" just before Chief Bogo came in at the call of Officer Higgins. "TEN-HUT!"

Judy almost failed to sit at attention thanks to the earlier incident, a fact which Nick found almost flattering. "Alright everyone, take your seats!" the cape buffalo ordered, and the room went silent instantly. Bogo held an imposing stack of documents between his hooves. "Now, it's been a difficult couple of weeks for all of us thanks to the recent 'changes' to our department." Nick couldn't tell if that split-second glare was directed at him or Judy or both. "But on the plus side, we've gotten more new applicants than ever who want to join our little family."

Judy grinned widely, which made Nick smile a bit himself. No doubt the bunny was extraordinarily pleased that her actions had brought about so much progress. He didn't have the heart to crush her hopes and point out that the vast majority of those applicants would most likely fail.

As if reading his thoughts, Chief Bogo spoke again. "As a matter of fact, two of these applicants have just graduated from the academy. I should introduce them, but I'm not going to-"

"-because you don't care?" Nick chimed in, getting some laughs out of the rest of the group.

This time, the glare was most certainly directed at him. "Because they're not  _here_  yet."

Nick glanced around the room, not seeing any new faces. "Touché."

"Once they arrive, I assure you that you are going to find this situation a lot less funny, Wilde," Bogo said, smiling in a way that said he knew something the fox didn't. It was a look Nick thought should've been reserved only for himself.

"In the meantime, assignments!" The chief fell right back into his usual routine, passing out case files to the other teams. "Officers Grizzoli, Fangmeyer, Delgato: mystery arsonist still at large. McHorn, Rhinowitz, Wolford: missing prosecutor in Savannah Central. Higgins, Snarlof, Trunkaby: suspicious activity in Tundratown. And lastly, Hopps and Wilde."

Once everyone else had left the room, Bogo narrowed his eyes at the two who remained. "As usual, you get the  _fun_  assignment. I take it you still remember the Night Howler Incident?"

"No sir, I completely forgot about it," said Nick, shrugging cluelessly.

"Well, that's too bad. Maybe your partner can fill you in later." Nick frowned. Either Bogo was getting better at this, or he was losing his touch. "But to summarize: toxic flowers discovered to turn animals savage, mastermind put behind bars, flowers banned from the city, and that was the end of that, right?"

Judy smiled and nodded while Nick, knowing better, did not respond.

"WRONG!" Bogo slammed a hoof onto his podium with enough force to chip it a little. "Once a dangerous illegal substance becomes public knowledge, it's only a matter of time before someone starts abusing it. There's been a black market on these things for a while now, but it's grown significantly as of late. I believe what we're dealing with is a full-blown Night Howler smuggling ring in Zootopia."

Judy gasped. "You mean someone's been turning animals savage again?"

"Of course not! That kind of thing would be far too easy to notice. The reports indicate that the buyers may actually be using it on themselves."

"What?" The bunny's ears flopped against her head in confusion. "Why would anyone  _want_  to turn savage?"

"Same reason the fine folks at Mystic Spring don't like to wear clothes," Nick explained. "They're trying to embrace their 'wild sides' and get down with their bad selves."

"I don't  _care_  what the reason is!" Bogo shouted. "The point is they need to be stopped before this gets any more out of hand. Witnesses have reported spotting a possible dealer in Sahara Square, selling Night Howlers from a white van. They may or may not be connected to this smuggling ring, but either way, I want them brought in."

"A white van? How obvious can you be?" Nick shook his head in pity. "No problem chief, this guy is clearly an amateur. We'll catch em' in no time."

"Glad to hear it. Then I will expect an arrest report by the end of the day. Dismissed!" Bogo turned and left the room without another word, slamming the door behind him.

"Nice going, Nick. I sure  _hope_  we can nab this dealer by the end of the day, or else the chief's gonna stick us in the records room for a week," said Judy, making her way out of the bullpen. "If we're lucky."

Nick followed behind her at a significantly slower pace. "Relax, Carrots, I know what I'm talking about. Trust me, this is going to be simple."

6.) Any case that sounds simple very rarely is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is where we're going to jot down random trivia and background details for each chapter. Feel free to just click that next button if you don't care.
> 
> I'm actually not sure if Nick lives in the Rainforest District. I could've sworn that was canon, but now I can't seem to find a confirmation on it anywhere. So for the purposes of what will inevitably become an AU anyway, let's just roll with it.


	2. Dealer or No Dealer?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As usual, I want to get at least one more chapter of this up before going back to my other fic. I personally hate finding stories I like with only one chapter, so I'd rather spare others of that pain if I can.

**Chapter 2: Dealer or No Dealer?**

_Sahara Square_

_8: 21 AM_

Logistics wise, it was actually pretty impressive how quickly everything went wrong.

It started out as a routine assignment. The two ZPD officers had made their way to Sahara Square in what Nick jokingly referred to as their personal monster truck. Nowhere was it more obvious that these weren't your average cops than when it came to their patrol car. He constantly felt like he was compensating for something just riding in it.

"So I have to ask, what's with those shades anyway?" Judy looked over at her partner, once again wearing his aviator sunglasses.

"It's part of being a nightwalker." She stared at him blankly. "Slang for nocturnal animal. The shades keep my poor, sensitive eyes from burning out in the sun, especially in  _this_  part of town."

Judy's face fell. "Oh...I had no idea. I kind of thought you wore them just to look cool."

"Nah, it's all part of the job. The fact that I happen to look amazing in them is just a bonus." He pinched the edge of the glasses and clicked his tongue for emphasis. "But as distracting as they may be, you should probably pay more attention to the road."

"I'm paying attention just fine," said Judy indignantly.

"Tell that to the stop sign you just ran."

"WHAT?!" Judy nearly jumped out of her seat, frantically checking her rearview mirrors. The bunny was practically having a panic attack. "Where?! Where was it?! I need to know! I...I..."

She stopped, her eyes slowly narrowing at him. "There was no stop sign, was there?"

"And had you been paying attention, you would have known that."

Not having any good counterargument, Judy just huffed and went back to driving.

* * *

_8: 46 AM_

There were no more distractions after that. Which was good because, as it turned out, Judy could pay  _very_  close attention when she needed to. "Hey, you think that's our guy?"

Nick leaned forward and squinted through his shades. Their car was just coming up on the edge of a large parking lot, sitting in the shade of a palm tree. He could just make out a dirty white van cruising slowly through the lot. "Whoa, good eye. Must be all those carrots, Carrots."

"We can't know for sure though, and we won't get close enough to find out in the car. Let's park here and move in on foot." Judy opened her door and hopped out.

Nick followed, feigning reluctance. "Great. Nothing more soothing than bare pads on hot concrete."

"Oh hush. At least you  _have_  pads."

Heading into the parking lot, they quickly found that the rows of cars made for some great cover. They kept their heads low and moved quietly from car to car, all while keeping their eyes on the white van. They didn't want to get too close, but they couldn't risk losing sight of it either.

They were just starting to wonder how to proceed when the van suddenly stopped, right in the middle of the lot, its back facing towards them.

Nick and Judy quickly ducked behind another car. "Do you think he spotted us?" Judy whispered.

"If he spotted us, he'd be doing the opposite of stopping."

"That's assuming he's actually a drug dealer and not just an ordinary civilian."

"Carrots, nothing  _about_  this screams 'ordinary'."

They slowly lifted their heads and peered over the car. Not only had the van stopped, there now appeared to be no sign of activity from it whatsoever. "I can't tell if this is suspicious or just weird," said Judy, frowning. "What do you think we should-?"

She paused as her sensitive ears picked up a small click, and turned to see Nick lowering his phone. "Just snapped a pic of the license plate. We might need to track this guy down later." He chuckled at her stunned expression. "I know how to do my job  _sometimes_ , Fluff. So what do you suggest?"

"I was going to ask you the same thing." She shook her head and looked back at the stopped van. "I guess we wait and see what happens."

* * *

_8:57 AM_

This assignment was quickly turning into more of a stakeout than a simple arrest. "So...is he gonna do anything? Like, ever?" Nick rested his head on top of the car, bored already. "This is getting ridiculous. Maybe we should just move in. We can at least question the guy. Who knows, maybe we'll get lucky and find him chewing on Night Howlers."

Judy's ears suddenly shot up, making Nick quickly push her head back down before they were spotted. "Do you hear that?" she asked.

"If I had a nickel for every time you've asked me that question." Nick rolled his eyes. "No, I  _don't_  have super rabbit ears. What did you pick up?"

"There's another car coming."

"In a parking lot? Oh, the horror!"

"Just keep watching!"

They both peeked over the car again, now seeing a black SUV drive up and park nearby. A group of three other animals, a rhino and two tigers, climbed out of the vehicle and approached the van. They each wore dark suits that looked both intimidating and extremely uncomfortable in this heat. "Okay,  _that's_  definitely suspicious. Maybe you're on to something after all, Carrots."

Unfortunately, the angle they were at made it impossible to identify the driver. However, they clearly saw the rhino pass a wad of bills into the window, then receive a small brown bag in return. Smiling, the group of three turned and walked back to their car. Judy shuddered as she imagined the toxic pellets that could well be inside that bag. "It's terrible."

"I know! The guy's doing this in broad daylight? He's just  _asking_  to get caught."

"It's suspicious enough to question him at least. And if that really was a Night Howler deal, we can't let those buyers get away either. I'm calling this in."

"Finally, some action!"

He got a lot more action than he hoped for, as at that very moment, a particularly strong gust of wind blew past them. That wouldn't have been much of an issue, except for what happened next. "Hmm?" One of Judy's ears went up again. "I think I hear...sniffing?"

She heard more than that a second later when the van suddenly started up and drove off with a loud screech. "Crap! I think he smelled us!"

"Smelled  _what?_  You can't  _smell_  cop!" If you could, his former life would have been a lot easier.

But that was the least of their problems now, as not only did the van take off, but so did the SUV, driving away in the opposite direction. "No, no, no!" Judy looked back and forth anxiously, trying to decide on a course of action.

What she decided was that chasing down a moving vehicle on foot didn't come across as smart, no matter which one she picked. "We've gotta call this in  _now!"_

"Sure, but hold on to these first." She found Nick's shades slipped onto her belt.

"Why do I need to-NICK!"

To her horror, the fox was already running off in pursuit of the white van. "Don't worry, Carrots, I sort of know what I'm doing!"

Being the more analytical of the two, Nick realized something that Judy hadn't. On a straight road, the van would have already been long gone, but because it was stuck in the middle of a parking lot, it first had to maneuver its way out. That gave him the opportunity to cut it off before it could escape. Now, what he was actually planning to  _do_  once he caught up to it, he hadn't quite decided.

As the van veered closer, Nick was forced to start running on top of the cars to get to it. "Stop, police!" Shouting that never actually worked, but it was tradition. Having no better plan, Nick did something completely crazy, even by his standards.

When the van passed in front of him, he leapt onto the roof.

Judy, having just gotten back to the patrol car, immediately grabbed her radio. "Dispatch, this is Officer Hopps! I have visual on our suspected Night Howler dealer driving a white van! Three other suspects fleeing in a black SUV! Officer Wilde is in pursuit!"

She paused, jaw hanging open, as the van sped by with Nick hanging off the top. "...No, he's not driving the car right now. Please don't ask how he's pursuing." Out of the corner of her eye, Judy saw the SUV disappear around a corner. She knew they would never catch up to it unless she went after it right now.

Judy sighed, wondering when  _she_  had become the reasonable one, then blared her sirens and took off after the van. "Dumb fox."

* * *

_9:03 AM_

Nick wasn't sure what made him think this was, in any way, a good idea. Maybe he had been hanging around Judy too much and her natural sense of reckless justice had rubbed off on him. Or maybe he had just seen too many action movies and did what came naturally. Whatever the reason, he couldn't exactly change his mind now. The Night Howler dealer wasn't about to slow down just because he had taken on an extra passenger, especially not with blaring police sirens trailing behind them. Nick saw only two options: either stay put until Judy caught up, or try to do something even dumber.

Well, he would feel pretty silly having to explain that he had jumped on top of a moving van for literally  _no_  reason, so he might as well try to see this through. "Woodchuck Norris, don't fail me now." Digging his claws into the sides of the roof, Nick started to slowly shimmy himself forward. The wind resistance, not to mention turbulence, made it difficult, but he was nothing if not determined. As much as the sun started to hurt his eyes, he was glad he had left his shades behind. There was no way they would have hung on as long as he had.

The problem came when he reached the front of the van and realized that, yet again, he hadn't thought this through. He could see that the passenger side window was still open, but he couldn't very well just jump down there. Not at this kind of speed.

But the choice was made for him when the van suddenly made a sharp turn to the left, making Nick lose his grip and roll off the right side. If he hadn't noticed it already, he might not have been able to grab the edge of the window as he fell past it. Good thing he did too, or he would be roadkill right now. As the van straightened itself out again, the momentum carried Nick forward, and he just managed to get himself through the window.

He didn't think anything could possibly be harder than what he had just miraculously pulled off, but what he saw in front of him now gave him even more pause.

_"Finnick?!"_

The fennec fox sat behind the wheel, gripping it so tightly his wrists shook. He turned his head and gave Nick one of the most vicious glares he'd ever seen, yet it wouldn't have bothered him at all if not for the fact that it was coming from one of his closest friends. "You just  _had_  to go and make this difficult, didn't you?"

Nick's shock wore off quickly enough, and his fledgling cop instincts kicked in to replace it. "Stop the van," he demanded.

"Yeah, I don't  _think_  so," Finnick said, tilting his head in the direction of the chasing sirens. "I've got enough problems dealing in Sandcat's territory without the fuzz getting in my way. Now beat it!"

Without even thinking, Nick had drawn his taser, trying to maintain focus. "Finn, I am not kidding around here. Stop the van now!"

This only made the smaller fox laugh mockingly. "Ooooooh, look at you, Nick! You think you're so tough with all your fancy cop tech! Please! You ain't got the guts!"

"I just traveled the last ten blocks on your roof! Don't tell me about guts!"

"Go ahead and tase me then, smart guy, because that's the only way you're stopping this van!"

Nick swallowed. He couldn't do it. He didn't even need a second of thought to conclude that much. He had been trained to use a taser to the point that seeing its effects no longer bothered him, but the idea of using it on Finnick made him as anxious as that ignorant rookie still trying to get through the academy.

He lowered the weapon and softened his tone, trying for a different approach. "Look...it doesn't have to be this way. You know me. You know Judy. We can work something out if you just cooperate and-"

"And play by your rules?! Is that what you were going to say?!" Nick flinched. That was a mistake. His attempt at defusing the situation had only made Finnick angrier. "Because I know that's what you  _meant!_ " he growled. "You think that just because you're in that uniform, that makes you a hotshot now! That you have some kind of moral high ground over me just for deciding that you were too good to play dirty anymore! You want me to stop the van?! I'LL STOP THE DAMN VAN!"

Without warning, the fennec fox slammed on the brakes, bringing the van to a screeching halt and sending Nick flying into the dashboard. He pulled himself up and regained his senses just in time for Finnick to tackle him through the door. Nick hit the pavement and rolled back to his feet, seeing that they were now in the middle of an alleyway.

"You don't wanna arrest me for drug dealing, Nick?" He saw Finnick climb back into the van and reach into his glove compartment. His eyes widened when he came back out wielding a baseball bat. "Then how about assaulting an officer?!"

Finnick snarled and swung at Nick's side. The taller fox dodged backwards, watching the bat collide with a trash can and leaving a large dent. Grabbing the lid off of it, Nick blocked the next few swings with some difficulty, his improvised shield rapidly failing. "Finnick, come on! You don't want to hurt me!"

"Pretty sure I wanna hurt you a lot actually!"

Nick had been a cop long enough to know that this was the point where negotiation was officially off the table. "I warned you." Nick dropped the lid and rolled away from Finnick's next swing, then drew his taser once more and aimed it at his back. But despite the imminent danger, he still hesitated to pull the trigger, and the next thing he felt was Finnick's bat smashing into his wrist.

Yelping, Nick dropped his weapon as Finnick followed up with a kick to the groin. He wasn't sure if that was intentional, or just the highest target his foot could reach, but either way it hurt like hell. As he staggered back in pain, Finnick swept his legs out from under him with the bat and knocked him to the ground. He looked back up to see the fennec fox slowly approaching, patting his bat into his palm threateningly. "I gotta say, you make a lousy cop, Nick. Should'a stuck with selling pawpsicles."

*THUNK*

Before he could pummel him further, Finnick suddenly froze on the spot, his expression drooping. He let out a weak groan, then collapsed to the ground. Behind him, Nick could see Judy holding her tranq gun, her arms noticeably shaking. "Are you okay?"

Nick looked down at the unconscious Finnick. "Could be better." Physically, he was sore in several places, but he knew he would recover soon enough.

Judy bit her lip. "I'm sorry I had to do that. I know he was your friend- _is_  your friend," she quickly amended.

"No, I think you had it right the first time. Probably for the best that you tranqed him, or else you'd hear him badmouthing me all the way back to the station. Can't have anyone lowering your opinion of me, right Carrots?" Nick cracked his signature smirk, snapping right back to his usual self in no time. Masking his emotions was one of his greatest talents, for better or for worse.

Of course, Judy knew him too well by now to fall for it, but she let the issue drop regardless. "...Right."

With some reluctance, Nick cuffed Finnick and locked him in the back of their squad car, desperately hoping that they would make it to the precinct before he woke up. Judy had told him a while ago that being a police officer was about making the world a better place. That he was supposed to feel a rush of confidence and pride from bringing a criminal to justice.

So why did he instead feel like the scum of the Earth?

* * *

_Tundratown_

_9: 17 AM_

Kristy Elkwood was what you would call an average citizen. She woke up, went to work, came back home, ate some dinner, watched some TV, and went to bed. Rinse and repeat. There were thousands of examples of such people to be found in this city alone. And as was often the case, it was an average citizen who would be the one to set the gears into motion.

It was just another average day for Kristy as she left her average home and hopped on the Flow Ped to ride to work. There was nothing significant about this. She did it literally every day of the week. It only became something more when her eyes wandered aimlessly down and she caught a glimpse of something floating in the icy river below.

Had she just ignored it, her average life would have continued on as per usual. But Kristy did not ignore it. Almost reflexively, she reached down and scooped the object out of the river with her hoof, dropping it onto the ice floe to get a better look.

It was at that moment that the day of this average citizen became...not so average.

Kristy screamed.

Lying on the ice in front of her was the stiff, half-frozen body of Mr. Big.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like to imagine Judy getting to finally use that tranq gun from the first trailer once she actually makes it as a cop. Likewise, I see Nick as a taser guy for whatever reason. We decided on giving each of them their own standard weapon instead of them having both just for variety.
> 
> No, Kristy Elkwood is not going to have any significance beyond this chapter. She is literally just that character who stumbles across the body at the beginning of a crime drama.


	3. Of Dreams and Dingoes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp, I guess we better address a certain something now that someone's brought it up in the reviews. No, this is not a WildeHopps story. We both support the pairing and might hint at it here and there, but it's not at all what the story is about. Not like there isn't enough of those already.
> 
> This and the next chapter are going to be mostly concurrent, meaning this one will focus mainly on Nick and the next on Judy. Just because it's Nick's story, we're not gonna leave everyone's favorite bunny cop out of the limelight.

****

**Chapter 3: Of Dreams and Dingoes**

_Savannah Central_

_Zootopia Police Department - Precinct 1_

_9: 45 AM_

Nick felt like utter crap by the time they got back to the precinct, and not just because he had gotten it kicked out of him less than an hour ago.

He tried his best to hide it. The whole trip back, he was his usual snarky self, making snide jabs at his partner in order to keep his mind off of his  _ex_ -partner locked away in the back. Thankfully, Finnick hadn't woken up in that time, possible evidence that maybe the universe wasn't  _completely_  against him this morning.

It was inconclusive at best.

Upon their return, Finnick had quickly been taken into custody, pending interrogation once he regained consciousness. In the interim, the ZPD had confiscated his van. It was no surprise that they quickly found enough to charge the fennec fox with distribution and trafficking of a controlled substance, though only through records as it seemed that he had sold all of the actual substance already. And of course, he had assaulted an officer. Nick's own battered body was proof enough of that. He was only now starting to feel how sore he really was, but he barely noticed with everything else that was going through his mind right now.

"Nick, I know you're not okay, no matter how much you want to deny it." Judy's foot thumped against the floor as she looked at the fox. Nick was seated at his desk, leaning back, feet up, and staring at the ceiling. Or so she assumed, since she couldn't actually see his eyes. "And wearing your sunglasses indoors is not helping your case."

"Sorry, I didn't realize we were the  _fashion_  police."

"Nick!" Her thumping got even faster. She didn't mean to be impatient with him, but she had tried the gentle approach for the entire ride back and failed to make any cracks whatsoever in his emotional mask. The only cracks she got were about her driving skills.

The fox threw his arms up in obviously-feigned surrender. "Okay, fine. I had to arrest one of my best friends and now he's being interrogated for drug dealing. It kinda sucks, you know?"

"There's more to it than that," she said sharply, her foot quickly approaching the sound barrier.

Nick lifted his shades and looked back at her, his eyes blank but calculating. She couldn't tell what he was thinking at all when he was like this, but at least he'd finally dropped the act. Her foot stopped thumping as she waited patiently for him to answer her.

She would have to  _keep_  waiting too because they were interrupted at that very moment. "Wilde! You're needed in the interrogation room!" yelled the booming voice of Chief Bogo from down the hall.

That was enough to get a real reaction out of Nick, making him sit up in his seat instantly. The sudden movement made his shades nearly fall off, but he didn't seem to notice. "I'm sorry, what?"

"The suspect asked for you! Don't ask why! He just said you're the only one he'll talk to!"

Nick shook his head in disbelief, and now the glasses did fall off. He had figured he was the absolute _last_  mammal Finnick wanted to talk to. What kind of freaky alternate universe had he ended up in?

"See?" Judy smiled at him. "Maybe there's hope for you two after all."

"Or maybe he just wants to chew me out in person," Nick replied cynically.

"Oh, I don't think so. I think he still values you as a friend."

"How do you figure?"

"Because otherwise, the chief wouldn't be so confused."

He paused, thinking over Bogo's words. Nick hadn't mentioned his connection to "the suspect" in the arrest report, and deliberately so. If anyone found out, he would just say that his past misdeeds were irrelevant to the case at hand, which was technically true. He hadn't survived this long without knowing his way around the system. Still, Finnick could have put him in quite the awkward position by bringing it up anyway, the term "conflict of interest" coming to mind. The fact that he hadn't showed that perhaps there was still some loyalty left in him.

Which only made Nick feel even more guilty, but at least now he could put this thing to rest.

"Alright, I'm coming!" He stood back up, giving a thumbs-up to Judy, which she returned with a hopeful grin. Oh, that poor naive bunny.

Judy watched Nick leave, fingers crossed that he could make peace with his old friend. She had to keep reminding herself that Finnick was also a drug dealer who could provide useful information about the smuggling ring, but that somehow didn't seem as important right now.

In the meantime, maybe she could figure out why the station suddenly seemed to be in such an uproar.

* * *

_Interrogation Room_

_9: 51 AM_

"I'm going to be blunt, Wilde. I'm not a fan of giving in to the demands of a criminal." Bogo's scowl alone could have told him that much. "But as of about thirty minutes ago, my priorities have shifted. I'm heading to Tundratown to try to calm the situation. I'll wait to hear what you've found out when I return."

"Yes, chief." Nick didn't know what "the situation" was, but his own list of priorities told him that he didn't care right now. All that mattered was getting this interrogation over with.

He was uncomfortable the moment he stepped into the room. One look at Finnick through the one-way mirror made him cringe and turn away. "Can you...can you take the muzzle off?"

There were two other officers in the room, McHorn and Wolford, currently between their own investigation of a missing prosecutor. Nick presumed he was still missing. "Are you sure? The guy kind of tore you a new one," the rhino pointed out.

Oh awesome, that was common knowledge now. "I'm fine, really. I'd be a lot  _more_  fine if I didn't have to look at that...thing."

Wolford shrugged, probably figuring it was no skin off his teeth, and went into the room to remove Finnick's muzzle. Predictably, the small fox made a bite for his arm the second it was off, then laughed maniacally at the wolf who now looked ready to wet himself. Nick couldn't help but laugh along a little, even if that had probably just earned Finnick another count of assaulting an officer.

"He's all yours," Wolford said, not making any eye contact with Nick or his partner as he threw the muzzle across the room and sat down as far away from the glass as possible.

"Just keep in mind that everything you say in there will be recorded," said McHorn, so nonchalantly that he'd probably expected it to be common sense.

Nick froze on the spot. Of  _course_  it was going to be recorded! How had he gone from abusing loopholes to forgetting the most basic of police procedures in a matter of hours? This whole mess was really throwing him off his game. How was he going to do this now?

Maybe he could fake it. Finnick was smart enough to know how to play along, and they could pretend to be the usual officer and suspect who clearly did not know each other in the slightest. They'd run enough cons together that it shouldn't be a problem.

...Except that running cons together  _was_  the problem. No, he needed to get this resolved, and if that meant being a little more open than he was used to, so be it.

Nick took a deep breath, opened the door, and stepped inside.

* * *

_9:54 AM_

"Hey, buddy!"

Okay, that might have been a bit much.

"Nick." Finnick's tone was surprisingly calm, but it wasn't fooling him for a second. It seemed the fennec fox had switched from his usual "loud psychotic rage" to "quiet simmering rage", which was probably worse.

Nick sat himself down in the opposite chair in one swift motion. "Okay look, I don't want to be here, you don't want to be here, so how about you just tell me what you were doing with that contraband and we can work from there."

Finnick didn't respond, but his cuffed wrists noticeably tightened, as if he was trying to break the restraints through sheer force of will. That, or he was going to attempt to strangle him with them.

Nick's claws tapped on the table. "Or you can just sit in here and keep being mad at me for doing my job. That works too." He remained silent. "Finn, I don't know what you want from me, but if you called me in here just to have a staring contest, then you win. Congrats." He made a move to get back up.

"It wasn't just the drug bust, you fuzzy idiot!"

The sudden outburst made Nick stop in place. If he wasn't so used to it, he might've flinched. "Ah, now  _there's_  the old angry Finnick I know and love. Alright, so what is it then?"

His paws slammed down on the table. "It's because you ditched me!"

He had a feeling he wasn't referring to throwing him in detainment. "You mean...when I became a cop." Finnick's glare confirmed it. "Come on, I told you why I needed to do this when I signed up. You can't keep holding it against me."

"Like hell I can't!" Finnick snapped his teeth at him. "You don't get it, Nick! You still get to have a successful job and make a name for yourself, but  _me?!_  I'm stuck as a two-bit con-mammal without a partner!"

Nick inadvertently glanced up at the camera recording this whole thing. He could only imagine how McHorn and Wolford were reacting to this too. The mental image alone almost made him laugh, and that would have been a really bad idea right now. "So what? You were doing perfectly fine before you ever met me."

"Well, that about sums it up right there," Finnick said dryly. Without warning, he suddenly leapt onto the table, a position that made him only slightly taller. He was intimidating regardless, and Nick reflexively backed away in his seat as Finnick started towards him.

"Maybe I would have been better off just leaving you to die on the streets all those years ago! But no, the stupid little runaway just  _had_  to go and get me all attached! Made me get used to working with a partner, having someone I could call a friend, carrying out all those ridiculous cons together! Frankly, I should have told you to take a hike the first time you said, 'Hey Finn, let's try dressing you up as a toddler'!" Just before he would've reached him, Finnick stopped his approach, looking down and shaking his head. "Now I gotta play it solo again and I...I just can't do it anymore."

He apparently didn't find throttling Nick to be worth the trouble, as he returned to his seat with no further issue. "I've tried other partners. Hell, I even teamed up with that tool Weaselton for a while. But I could never find one as good as you."

"Awww, I love you too, buddy."

"Don't push it, smartass!" he snapped.

Nick clasped his paws together and smiled at him. "Well, if we're going to get sappy now...I'm sorry things turned out like this, Finnick."

" _You're_  sorry?  _I'm_  the one doing hard time!" Finnick sighed sadly and hung his head in resignation. He seemed to have burned out his will to be angry, something Nick thought he would never witness. Now he just looked...exhausted.

"So you gonna get on with it?" he asked.

"With what?"

Finnick looked at him like he was an idiot. "The interrogation? You know, that thing you came in here for? Just get it over with and get outta my face."

"Oh...right." Nick turned and gave a sheepish grin to McHorn and Wolford through the one-way glass, who were probably bored out of their skulls at this point. He cleared his throat, suddenly becoming the professional he sometimes alleged to be. "Alright then, Finnick, tell me about your Night Howlers."

"They ain't Night Howlers."

Nick's tail raised in surprise, both from the information and the fact that Finnick had given it up so easily. "What do you mean?"

"I mean they ain't Night Howlers," he repeated, enunciating slowly for him to understand. "At least, not anymore. They've done some sciency crap to them and turned them into something they call 'Feral Dream'. Stupid name if you ask me."

"Artsy, but what's the difference?"

"They're like a distilled version of the Night Howler formula," Finnick explained. "Still turns you into a savage lunatic, but leaves you lucid enough that you get to experience it firsthand. Being one with your primal side like that is a reeeeeeal attractive proposition for preds and prey alike. Addictive too, like your very  _instincts_  start craving it." He paused, suddenly remembering he was talking to a cop. "Or so I've heard."

"I see," Nick said blankly. "That includes your pals in the SUV I presume?"

"Beats me. I have no idea who those guys were, I was just told to meet with them. I'm not paid to ask questions."

"And who exactly was paying you?" Finnick frowned, showing his teeth. He should've known it wouldn't be this easy. "Come on now, don't get 'finnicky' with the details."

Evidently, he wasn't  _completely_  burned out on anger. "I'm gonna freaking murder you!"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Nick put his paws up, looking around uneasily. " _Not_  the kind of thing you want to say around here!"

Finnick sighed in frustration, but let it slide. "Look, the Feral Dream thing is easy enough to find out about, at least if you're not the fuzz. I can't just sell out the guys who helped me get back in shape."

"Oh yeah, because you were clearly the top dog with that cheap white van of yours." He was tempted to ask what happened to the old one, but he had a feeling that question would trigger another relapse.

Finnick looked away, growling softly.

"Just give me a name, a species,  _something_  to go on, and you can walk out of this room with a lighter sentence," Nick pressed.

He turned his head back towards him, ever so slightly. "You can't promise me that. You don't have the authority."

"I don't, but I'll see what I can do." Nick looked straight into his ex-partner's eyes. "I'm not going to abandon you again, Finnick. I promise."

Finnick stared at him for a long time, likely trying to discern how truthful he was being. While the fennec's gaze made him uncomfortable, Nick held the stare, determined to show him that he meant every word.

It seemed to have worked too, as Finnick let out a scream of defeat and banged his head against the table. "Okay, okay, FINE! His name is Fangs alright?!"

Nick drew circles on the table with one claw. "Hmmm, doesn't sound like a very unique name. Gonna need a little more than that…"

"He's a dingo! From Outback Island! Has brown eyes! Wears a denim jacket and shorts! Smells like old sweat! Constantly scratches at himself like he's covered in fleas! Is that enough info for you?!"

"That should about do it, yes," Nick nodded, smirking. "Anything else you want to add?"

"You're an asshole."

"Noted. Thanks for the info. I'll see you around, Finn." Nick got back up and made to leave.

"Nick?" One paw over the doorknob, he looked back over his shoulder again. Finnick wasn't done with him yet. "You can't hang with cops  _and_ criminals. It just doesn't work like that. Sooner or later, you're gonna have to pick one."

His paw shook. "...Sure."

He got out of there.

* * *

_10: 13 AM_

"Ha! I _told_  you making puppy-dog eyes at the perp could work!"

McHorn grumbled to himself and handed a twenty dollar bill to a grinning Wolford. "Thanks for the payday, Nick."

"No problem." Nick gave a small smile to the lupine. "Hey...so about all that was said in there..."

"We got it all on video. Took notes too," Wolford said apologetically. "Sorry, but if the chief asks to see it, we can't very well say no."

"Yeah, I had a feeling you'd say that." Nick rubbed the back of his neck. "It's alright. I'll smooth talk my way out of trouble, just like I always do."

"Although...the chief's pretty busy right now," McHorn cut in. "I doubt he'll have the time to watch the whole video. He'll probably just ask us for a summary report."

"Yeah, and all that really mattered was that Feral Dream stuff, right?" Wolford asked. "The rest of it was pretty irrelevant to the case."

McHorn nodded. "Be a waste of time to tell him really."

Nick smiled, a real one this time. "Thanks, guys."

"Hey, just be glad we let you sort that thing out. You have  _no_  idea how close I came to busting in there when that guy jumped on the table."

"Seriously, you ever  _seen_  a charging rhino? Not pretty," Wolford added.

* * *

_Lobby_

_10: 15 AM_

In just the short walk from the interrogation room to the lobby, Nick was feeling better already. Not only had he (sort of) made up with Finnick, he could now see that he had even more real friends than he thought. He leaned casually against the front desk, smiling broadly.

"Hey, Benji, still a ray of sunshine?"

Clawhauser's mouth was stuffed, of course, but he nodded anyway.

"Me too, Benji. Me too." It would probably be a while before Chief Bogo came back, which gave him a bit of free time. "Not to be predictable, but do you know where Cottontail went? I was thinking about grabbing a coffee."

The cheetah raised a finger to signal that he was still eating, not that he ever really stopped, and swallowed. "Actually, I think she's out investigating the Mr. Big murder case right now. I'm not sure when she'll be back."

"Oh, okay. If she comes by, tell her I'm at Snarlbucks. Thanks." Nick pushed himself off the counter and headed for the door.

He made it about halfway across the room before his brain finally caught up. "Wait, WHAT?!"

Nope, the universe was  _definitely_  against him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was easily the hardest chapter to write so far. Doing a lengthy conversation between Nick and Finnick that both kept them in character AND made it emotional without being too angsty was a hell of a challenge. Let us know how well we pulled it off.


	4. The Big Case

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to what is easily the longest chapter thus far. There was a lot to cover. I'm certainly not complaining, but I'm very glad now that we decided to split the last two chapters or else this thing would have been even more massive. Thank you for all the support thus far (including one VERY enthusiastic guest reviewer). The actual meat of the story officially begins now.

****

**Chapter 4: The Big Case**

_Savannah Central_

_Zootopia Police Department - Precinct 1_

_9: 53 AM_

The commotion around the ZPD had been bothering Judy for quite some time, if for no other reason than because she had very good ears. Having been completely preoccupied with Nick at the moment, she had tuned it all out. Now she was beginning to wish she hadn't.

It started with a misunderstanding. "Yes, I get that it's  _big_ , but what happened?"

Clawhauser shook his head, looking over at the bunny sitting on his desk. "No no no,  _Mr._ Big! He's been murdered!"

For a second, it seemed like time had stopped. In hindsight, it was probably her heart.

"W-WHAT?!" Judy reeled back, a paw over her chest. She couldn't believe what she just heard. It wasn't like she had been particularly close to the crime lord, especially since he had almost iced her at one point, but the idea that someone she knew personally had been killed sent shivers up her spine nonetheless. She couldn't stop herself from shaking, and Clawhauser quickly picked up on it.

"Are you okay, Judy? I get that it's a big deal," he couldn't help but giggle a little, "but you're taking this awfully hard."

"D-Don't worry. I-I-It's nothing." The fact that she had been on friendly terms with one of the city's worst criminals was not exactly something she wanted getting around. It hardly mattered  _now_ regardless. "Where was it?" she managed to ask.

"Up in Tundratown, of course. Yeah, apparently someone found his body just floatin' right along the Flow Ped. Talk about cra-zay." He spoke as if this was some thrilling new gossip instead of a homicide. "Killers these days, am I right?"

Judy's fists clenched and her gaze hardened. "I want to go up there." She wasn't even sure why. Somehow, this just felt personal to her.

Clawhauser frowned, which looked more like a pout on his pudgy face. "Gee, I don't know. I'm not sure if the chief would let you do that-oh hey, let's ask him! Chief!"

Judy whirled around, startled to see Chief Bogo in front of them. He had just been about to leave the precinct and was visibly annoyed that he couldn't just yet. "Yes? What is it, Clawhauser?"

"Officer Hopps wants to investigate the big mystery!" He giggled to himself again.

Bogo pointed a firm hoof at the feline, shutting him up instantly. "First off, enough with the 'big' puns! Lord knows they're going to be all over the headlines by this afternoon, so spare me the migraine while you can. Now then, Hopps!" The bunny sat up straight. "Why exactly do you wish to stick your twitchy little nose into this?"

Her nose did indeed start twitching as she tried to come up with an excuse. "Uh...well, sir, I have some free time, so I figured I might as well try to help out with the new case."

"You are aware, of course, that most mammals spend their free time  _not_ working."

"I am well aware, sir."

That excuse probably would have been a lot weaker coming from anyone but herself. "Very well. You completed your last assignment a lot quicker than I expected, which is starting to get annoying by the way, so you might as well come with me." He turned around and walked away, not waiting for her to catch up. She had no problem doing so anyway, and made it out of the building before Bogo did, holding the door open for him. "That too is getting annoying."

"Sorry, sir."

Judy started heading for her patrol car, expecting to follow the chief to Tundratown, when the cape buffalo cleared his throat loudly and pointed to his even larger car instead. For a moment, she was floored that Chief Bogo actually wanted her to ride in his car.

And to think, there was a time when he wouldn't let her do anything more than ticket them.

* * *

_Tundratown_

_10: 11 AM_

The ride up to the crime scene was cold, in more ways than one.

Chief Bogo was unnervingly silent the whole way up, but Judy didn't think he was intentionally ignoring her so much as he had forgotten she was there. Given the chief's solitary nature, his known hatred for smalltalk, and the size of his passenger seat, so large that her seat belt felt like more of a harness, it seemed a pretty likely theory.

She instead passed the time just looking out the window. Even now, the city of Zootopia had not lost its wonder to her, from the sunbaked sands of Sahara Square to the pristine snowfall of Tundratown. If she  _did_ have any problem staying focused on the road, and she still refused to admit that she had such a problem, it was only because everything else was so much more interesting.

Including the sight of police tape wrapped around a section of the local Flow Ped. "Is that where he was found?" she asked. Oddly, there only seemed to be a few forensics officers around, along with some disgruntled civilians who now had to find an alternative mode of travel.

"Yes, but it's not where we're going." She had gotten so used to Bogo's silence that he sounded a lot louder than he actually was. "The body was found floating down the river, which means that he was killed somewhere else. I have some of the forensics crew trying to dredge up clues around here, but I doubt they'll find anything useful. The bulk of the officers are investigating Mr. Big's compound as we speak."

"His...compound?" Judy asked, failing to hide the nervousness in her voice. She might have gotten along better with Mr. Big, but she still hadn't forgotten the first time she'd been brought to that place. "Is that allowed? I didn't think his bodyguards would let us investigate."

"Oh, I wouldn't worry about them." Chief Bogo could have a pretty morbid sense of humor sometimes. "They're dead too."

* * *

_Mr. Big's Compound_

_Entrance_

_10: 18 AM_

The first thing Judy noticed was that the building seemed significantly less frightening than usual. She wasn't sure if that was due to the large police presence or the fact that it was early in the morning as opposed to a dark, dreary night, but it looked like almost an entirely different place.

Not that she was at  _ease_ by any means. This was still a crime scene, and a crime scene for murder no less.  _Mass_ murder technically. "I need to go placate the press, but feel free to join up with Higgins and his team," Bogo advised as soon as they stepped out. "Just try not to cause too much trouble. I don't need to hear about you hanging off any more vans today." She would've pointed out that it was Nick who had done that, but the chief had already left. It was almost a relief that he wasn't sticking around after that awkward car ride.

Not having much more to go on, Judy made her way carefully through the crime scene, trying her best to keep out of anyone's way as they went about their work. Busy as they were, there was the very real possibility of being stepped on if she ventured too close. That would likely qualify as "trouble".

She eventually found one of the officers she was looking for surveying the scene. Francine Trunkaby was currently one of the only other female officers in the precinct, a point that quickly made them bond with each other despite the rather massive size difference. Judy knew from experience that the elephant could be a bit shy, but was quick to get fired up when duty called.

"Excuse me, Francine?" Judy had to tap her on the back of the leg to be noticed, and kept a wide berth in case she startled her too much.

The elephant's head turned and looked down at her. "Oh, hello, Judy! What brings you here?"

"I'm on the case now. It was kind of a…last-minute thing," she said, shuffling her feet in the snow. "Find anything so far?"

"We sure did," she replied, though her tone suggested she was less than pleased about it. "We get called here to investigate  _one_ homicide, then find a whole slew of them. Come on, I'll show you around."

Francine started off towards the compound itself, her stride so large that even Judy had a little trouble keeping up. "So...Big's bodyguards...they're really…?"

She nodded softly. "I'm afraid so. You should have seen us when we first barged into the office and found it littered with bear bodies. Snarlof pretty much had a panic attack and we had to escort him off the scene." Judy imagined she would have a very similar reaction to stumbling upon a room full of rabbit corpses.

As much as she hated to ask further, "What were they like?"

"If it's any consolation, they died quickly, each one shot through the head or the heart with an illegal firearm. There were four of them total. The rest seem to have cleared out."

That  _did_ make her feel a little better actually. At least they hadn't suffered. "And Big himself?"

Francine shrugged. "Unfortunately, we don't have much to go on. All we found was his chair tipped over and a miniature cigar confirmed to carry his DNA. Still, the forensics guys have a pretty good idea what happened. You heard about the state of the body?"

"A bit. He was found in the river, so he was probably frozen, right?" She still couldn't get used to a former acquaintance of hers being referred to as just "the body".

"Bingo. They're not sure if it was drowning or hypothermia that got him first, but the murder method is pretty obvious, don't you think?"

It should be; it had almost been  _her_ murder method. "The trapdoor in his office."

"Picture this: The killer busts in and takes out the bears. Mr. Big panics and makes a run for it, but the killer catches him and stuffs him down the hatch. Either shooting a target that small would've been too messy, or they just have a sick sense of irony. We've found some of Big's victims the same way, you know." She stopped for a moment. "Oh sorry, I mean his 'alleged' victims."

There was a good reason most cops didn't befriend crime lords. "Wait...we're talking about  _one_ killer here?"

"So you noticed?" Francine laughed humorlessly. "It does seem a bit much for one mammal to pull off, doesn't it? But we've only found evidence of one killer so far."

"There's evidence?!" Judy's ears shot up in excitement. Hearing about a homicide was gruesome, but hearing about the means to crack it was an opportunity to bring the criminal to justice. Nothing would make her happier at this point.

"You'll see." Finally reaching the front entrance, Francine headed inside the compound. With only slight hesitation, Judy followed after her.

* * *

_Big's Office_

_10: 24 AM_

Judy felt just as anxious as the first time she had been led down this corridor, that same feeling of dread crawling up her spine. If anything, knowing exactly what awaited her made it even worse. Francine stopped at the end of the hall, her arm hovering in front of the large double-doors that led into Big's office. "Are you sure you're okay?"

Judy fought down any nervousness she had left in her and stood up straight. "I've been a cop for almost a year now. I can handle this."

Her level of experience wasn't exactly impressive, but the elephant was satisfied and pushed open the doors for her. To Judy's great relief, the actual bodies had already been removed. The stench in the air and the blood on the carpets, however, had not. There was only minimal damage to the room itself, just a few pieces of furniture out of place, a knocked over lamp, and the slightly askew painting of Mr. Big's "grandmama", but compared to the fine precision she was used to, it might as well have been completely trashed. All of these factors combined made the atmosphere so overwhelming that the lack of physical corpses made little difference.

"So what's this evidence you found?" she asked, trying to keep her mind off of being in a room full of death.

If anything, Francine seemed to find her level of fortitude impressive. "As you surmised, whoever did this is a real professional. One bullet for each target, and not a trace of their own DNA left anywhere. Definitely not just some nutjob with a vendetta against the local crime boss. This guy knew what he was doing. However...they were not perfect." With a satisfied smile that reminded her a bit of Nick, she pointed down near one particular pool of blood.

Judy couldn't see anything unusual at first, until she noticed the small markings just outside of the pool. "He left tracks," she realized, now smiling herself.

"That he did. Heavy snowfall covered up any traces outside, but this one spot was left untouched. He must have been feeling pretty confident after killing one of the biggest crooks in the city and got just a little careless on his way out." She waved her hand at the bloody prints. "There's only a few, but they're clear enough to analyze. We've already sent photos to the National Paw Print Database. In just a couple of hours, we should at least be able to nail down the perp's species."

"Yes!" Judy did a jump for joy, which only reached up to Francine's neck despite her impressive leg strength.

But as she looked at the paw prints again, her eyes narrowed. "Hold on...there's something off about these prints."

"What do you mean?"

It took her a few seconds to realize exactly what was bothering her. "There's only one."

"One killer? Yes, I told you we-"

"No, one  _foot_."

Indeed, the tracks left outside of the puddle showed only what looked like the killer's right foot. "That's odd alright, but maybe his other foot just missed the puddle?" Francine suggested.

"Maybe." Judy got down on one knee, looking even closer. She might not have had Nick's fancy night vision, but she still had some pretty keen eyes of her own. Keen enough to spot some barely-visible spots of blood that lined up suspiciously well with the paw prints. "Or maybe he doesn't  _have_ another foot."

Francine's large eyes widened. "A prosthetic leg?"

"I think so. One of those old-fashioned peg leg types too."

The pachyderm nodded approvingly. "Well, once we have a species, that should narrow things down quite a bit. Nice catch, Judy." A gigantic fist came down and ruffled her head affectionately.

Getting a noogie from an elephant was not a wholly unpleasant experience, though it did almost knock her over. "Thanks. Just doing my job."

"Doing it better than some of the other blockheads I have to work with," she chuckled. "Anyway, that's about all we got for now. There's just one other thing that's been bothering me."

"What's that?"

"It's about the reason we were originally sent here." Judy quirked her head in confusion for a moment, but then she remembered the meeting from that morning. Francine's team was not sent to Tundratown to investigate a homicide, only suspicious activity. And that was long before the body was even found.

Even so, there were few terms less descriptive than "suspicious activity". "Right...so what was that about exactly?"

"As it so happens, it was about Mr. Big," she said darkly. "Or more accurately, his 'business'."

She already didn't like the sound of this. "How so?"

"Starting late last night, the ZPD has been getting unusual reports about Big's activities, or lack thereof. His boys suddenly disappearing from their usual hangouts, his compound going strangely silent, Tundratown Limo-Service coming to a complete halt. At the time, it was merely 'suspicious', but once Big's body was discovered, that drop in activity suddenly made a lot more sense."

"Okay, I get that," Judy said, trying to follow along. "But what's the problem? Isn't that kind of expected?"

Francine kneeled down to look her in the eyes. "The  _problem_  is that it's all up and running again. As we speak, Big's entire criminal empire is already back in business...without Big."

"That's impossible!" Judy gasped. "They couldn't have recovered this quickly! Unless..."

"Unless whoever killed Mr. Big also took control over his business," Francine finished. "In most cases, one of his own cronies would take charge, but that kind of thing doesn't happen  _literally_ overnight. No, this looks like more of a hostile takeover to me. And if that's the case, it makes the idea of a single culprit pretty unlikely."

"But didn't you say-?"

"I said it  _seems_ like there's one mammal behind this, probably by design. In reality, I suspect this is a whole lot bigger than that. I don't care if you're Jack Savage, you can't just waltz into the office of a major crime lord and shoot up the place. Not without some serious help." Francine stood back up and turned away, throwing her large arms into the air. "Of course, this is just idle speculation for now. We don't have any  _real_ evidence of some grand criminal conspiracy. We might be able to get some out of Big's daughter, but she's been extremely uncooperative so far."

"Fru Fru!" Judy slapped her paws to her forehead. How could she have forgotten about her? If this was so hard for Judy to swallow, she couldn't even imagine how badly the young shrew was taking it.

Unfortunately, her outburst had not escaped Francine's notice. "You know her?"

Crap. "...Do I know of her? Yes, yes I do."

As Francine gave a satisfied nod and went back to her business, Judy breathed a silent sigh of relief. Was this how Nick felt having to hide this kind of stuff? It made her feel dirty. "Do you know where I can find her? You know, for questioning?"

Francine shrugged and pointed her trunk to the other set of doors. "Her room is just down the hall on the very end. I already struck out and Higgins isn't faring any better, but you can give it a shot if you want. Nothing to lose except your sanity."

"Thank you." Judy turned around with an extra spring in her step and headed out of the room.

She had a shot alright. In fact, she was fairly certain she was the only cop in existence who could handle this particular task.

* * *

_Fru Fru's Room_

_10: 33 AM_

"For the last time, get lost!"

Judy almost laughed at the sight of the portly Officer Higgins crouched down over a tiny doorway in the middle of the hall. She couldn't see Fru Fru, but she could certainly hear her. Evidently, Higgins hadn't even managed to get her out of her room.

"I just want to ask you a few questions!" he insisted, sounding exasperated.

"Really? Well let me ask  _you_  one," the squeaky voice replied. "Is listening to your drivel going to bring my daddy back? No? THEN BEAT IT!"

The door to the shrew's room opened, only for a miniature purse to start whacking the hippo in the nose as Fru Fru continued shouting at him. "Go! Away! You! Lousy! No-good! Copper!" Judy wondered if it still counted as assaulting an officer if the officer barely noticed.

In any case, it was time to get involved. Judy stepped up just as Higgins had the door slammed in his face again. "Mind if I take over?"

Higgins looked up at Judy and rubbed his nose. It seemed Fru Fru was stronger than she looked. "Please! I-I mean, of course you may, Officer Hopps." He was so relieved to get out that he hadn't even bothered to ask why she was there.

As soon as he left, Judy bent down and knocked on the door lightly. Unsurprisingly, she got no response. "Fru Fru? It's me, Judy."

A few more seconds passed, and then the door swung open again. Fru Fru stood there in a black dress, smiling brightly. Her demeanor had changed in an instant as she ran out of the room and hugged Judy's ankle. It was the best she could do. "Judy! It's so good to see you! What brings you to this dreary place?"

"...Actually, the same thing that brought Officer Higgins here."

Her face fell. "Oh." Despite Judy being in full uniform, Fru Fru had a tendency to forget that her rabbit friend was a ZPD officer. "I guess you want to talk about what happened then?"

"I'm afraid so," Judy said sympathetically. "I heard what you said. We can't bring your father back, but we can at least bring his killer to justice."

"It's okay, I understand." She had a feeling Officer Higgins wouldn't have gotten that response. "But I won't talk about it out here. Come inside." She looked around suspiciously, then scurried back into her room.

"Inside?" Judy looked at the small door uneasily. If she could handle Little Rodentia, she could handle _this_ , right? Bracing herself, Judy took a few steps back, then dove into the opening head-first. She got stuck for a few seconds, but managed to squeeze her head through, followed by her arms, torso, and finally legs.

Pulling her left foot through the door, Judy looked around the room. Fru Fru was daddy's little girl alright. The place was huge (by rodent standards), with a fluffy bed, walk-in closet, and more frilly knick-knacks than she could count. It was almost entirely pink too, making the place exceedingly cheerful.

At a complete contrast to its resident. "What did you want to know?" Fru Fru asked, looking down at the floor and twiddling her thumbs.

Judy sat down cross-legged, but even with the high ceiling (again, by rodent standards), her ears didn't quite make the fit. It was very rare that she ever found herself too  _big_  to fit somewhere. It was almost refreshing actually.

Her ears weren't much of an issue either, as they drooped down almost as soon as she started talking. "Just...tell me everything you remember from that night."

Fru Fru nodded solemnly. "It wasn't much really. I was out clubbing with my friends at The Thaw until around midnight. By that time, Daddy would normally be texting me to come home, because he's sweet and he worries like that. But I didn't hear a peep outta him, so I gave him a call, just to make sure he was alright. He's...really protective of me, you know. I don't think he's ever taken more than two rings to pick up. So when it went to voicemail, I...I knew something was wrong. I rushed back home as fast as I could, but I couldn't find him anywhere. All I found...was... _them_."

She couldn't hold on to her composure any longer and broke out into sobs. Judy reached down to put a comforting paw on her, but Fru Fru beat her to it by grabbing one of her drooped ears and burying her face into it. "I just couldn't believe it," she cried, muffled by the soft ear fur. "Why would anyone want to hurt my daddy?"

Judy bit her lip. It was clearly an emotional response, given that there was a very large portion of Tundratown, at _least_ , that had reason to want Mr. Big dead. It was part of what made cases like this so tricky. "You found the polar bears in his office then?" She shuddered, trying to picture coming home to something like that. "Why didn't you call the police?"

"I know I should have, but Daddy drilled it into me a long time ago not to rely on the coppers for anything. He said they couldn't be trusted." Judy frowned a little, remembering why she hadn't much cared for the crime lord in the first place. "But I know that he's wrong now."

"Because we're here investigating it?"

Fru Fru pulled herself away from Judy's very moist ear and smiled up at her. "Because I know I can trust  _you_ , Judy."

She smiled back. "Thank you."

"Yeah, well, sorry I couldn't actually help at all," Fru Fru said bitterly. "That's part of the reason I didn't want anyone questioning me. I knew I was just gonna waste your time."

"You didn't-"

"Don't lie to me. I know that wasn't useful. I bet you got more info outta that broad who found him in the river." She sat herself down on her bed and sighed. "I'm just not cut out for this, Judy. Even if I  _could_  get Daddy's business back from whatever lousy mugs filched it from us, I could never whip it back into shape again."

Judy was about to offer more comfort when she realized what she'd said. "Wait, so you think one of your father's rivals is behind this too?"

"Of course," she said, as if it were obvious. Come to think of it, she had probably been taught to assume as much until proven otherwise. "This whole thing reeks of a dirty setup. Why do you think you only found four bodyguards, and only in the office? What do you think happened to all the rest, huh?"

"I-"

"I'll  _tell_  you what happened: they deserted us! I don't know if they were bribed, or recruited, or just deceived, but my daddy is dead because all he had for protection that night was just four stinking bears! So much for loyalty in the family and all that jazz! The rest of those lowlife traitors probably turned their heads away and laughed as the poor saps were gunned down! It makes me sick just thinking about it!" She emphasized that point by tearing her pillow in half. Judy gulped, reminded of why shrews were considered the most vicious of predators.

The act of violence seemed to have gotten it out of her system though. "You see what I mean? I'm in no state to try cleaning up this mess. Truth be told, I've never been that interested in taking over the business anyway. I'm a gal of simple pleasures, Judy. Now I just want to be with the family." She thought about that for a moment. "My  _actual_ family, not the 'family' family," she clarified. "That's why...I'm leaving it all behind for good."

It was only after that when Judy noticed that there was one detail of the room she had overlooked. Sitting in the corner, away from everything else, was a packed suitcase and a few boxes. "You're moving out?"

"Yeah. I just bought a nice place in Little Rodentia with Chester and little Judy." Big Judy had to smile at that. "I know you're not allowed within ten yards of that town anymore, so I'll send you pics as soon as possible, I promise!"

"Sure, I'd love that." Pleased to see Fru Fru in a somewhat chipper mood again, Judy was content to leave it at that. "Thanks for your help, and good luck." She gave a small wave and started to squeeze herself back out of the door again.

"Help? But I didn't-"

"Oh, you helped more than you know." Judy winked, her lower body now outside the room. "I'd say we've got plenty to go on now."

"Hey, Judy?"

Now it was just her head inside the room. "Yeah?"

Fru Fru grabbed her by both ears and narrowed her eyes at her. "You get the son of a bitch who did this and make him suffer."

Her nose twitched. "O-Okay."

_"Promise?"_

"Yes, yes, I promise!"

"Great! Pics soon! Keep in touch!" Fru Fru practically shoved her out of the room and shut the door again.

Judy took a few moments to process what just happened before she stood back up, brushing herself off. That was sure something alright. Now she was almost certain that Mr. Big's murder was a lot more complex than it initially appeared. Even better, now they had a few leads to prove it.

But first, Judy found that she had the sudden urge to call her parents.

* * *

_Tundratown Limo-Service_

_11: 02 AM_

Having a transportation company under your control really made things so much easier. You got a wide variety of vehicles to use, plenty of storage space, easily replaceable parts, and a convenient method to dispose of troublesome cars.

The black SUV didn't last five seconds in the compactor, soon becoming a far less identifiable black cube. "Aw, I kind of liked that ride," complained a tiger in a dark suit.

"Me too. Shame the ZPD had to spot it. The Count said we couldn't take chances," a rhino responded.

"Eh. What are ya gonna do?" asked a second tiger, shrugging.

"How about your jobs?"

All three mammals turned around, seeing a smaller, but more intimidating raccoon leaning against the side of a limousine. It was one of the models formerly belonging to Mr. Big, and now it served even less scrupulous purposes under a new owner. "You were supposed to be here over an hour ago."

He got some measure of satisfaction out of seeing them flinch. "Sorry, Simon," the rhino said. "The deal didn't go quite as smoothly as planned. The ZPD showed up and then-"

"Spare me the excuses!" Simon snapped, stomping his left leg into the snow. The peg made a noticeable indent. "Did you get a sample or not?"

"Uh, yes, sir." One of the tigers stepped forward, handing a brown bag over to the raccoon.

Simon reached inside and pulled out a small pellet, holding it between his claws as he examined it. At first glance, it looked just like a Night Howler pellet, but as he held it in the light, it became apparent that it was a lighter blue in color, and a bit softer to the touch. "Hmm...so this is Feral Dream. Not my kind of thing, but I'm sure it will make the Count absolutely giddy once he's able to reproduce it. Hooray for him."

He opened the door to the limo and hopped inside, leaning out of the window. "Anything else you three have to report?" he asked, in a tone that implied he very much wanted them to say no.

He did not get his wish as one of the tigers slowly raised his paw. "Actually, he just called a little while ago. He wanted us to ask if you followed all of his instructions...correctly…" He trailed off upon seeing Simon's fierce glare.

"I did what he asked and gave him what he wanted. If he has a problem with the way I do things, kindly remind him that I'm in this for my  _own_ reasons, not his petty revenge fantasy."

"Y-Yes, sir."

"So what should we do now?" asked the rhino.

"Hell if I know." He closed the window and sped off, driving the limo in a way limos were never meant to be driven.

Leaning back in his seat and letting his good foot rest against the gas pedal, Simon decided to enjoy one of the fringe benefits of his job: getting a nice, peaceful space to enjoy the classic tunes of Jerry Vole. Mr. Big died like a coward, but he had good taste in music.

"You're gonna get us a speeding ticket, you know. What a crummy way to get caught that would be."

Oh right. He wasn't alone. "Like that would be any problem for you. Shouldn't you be more focused on  _your_  target, Sang?"

A feminine voice from the backseat giggled at him. "Oh, there's plenty of time for that. I thought you might want to enjoy the pleasure of my company first."

"You sure you're not just looking for a free meal?"

"Depends. Are you offering?"

Simon growled to himself and gripped the steering wheel tightly, imagining his employer's neck under his paws.

"You had  _better_ make this all worth it, old man."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many artistic liberties are being taken with the other ZPD officers. Aside from essentially having to make up personalities for them due to very little info in the film, just their names alone seem to be a matter of contention. For one, the Disney wiki seems to list Officer Trunkaby and "elephant in the room" Francine as two different characters, but having seen only one elephant there, we say otherwise. A few of the other officers are a bit unclear too, such as Fangmeyer, Delgato, and Grizzoli, so we almost just matched those to whoever seemed to fit. This kind of thing is why we generally prefer to make new characters rather than try to twist barely established ones to our liking.
> 
> Speaking of which, there's going to be a bit of a change in the ZPD coming next chapter. Look forward to that.
> 
> Another disclaimer for the A03 crowd: This was barely a month after the movie came out. We seriously had NO freaking clue which name went to which officer and it seemed to change regularly. Expect a bit of inconsistency with what you're probably used to as a result.


	5. Hot & Cold

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To be honest, not much goes on in this chapter. Just lots of exposition, and preparation for the trip to Outback Island. But it's a necessary evil.

****

**Chapter 5: Hot & Cold**

_Savannah Central_

_Jumbeaux's Café_

_12: 14 PM_

"Wow, sounds like you had one crazy morning, Fluff." Nick took a loud slurp of his triple-layered blueberry/strawberry sundae, much to the annoyance of his partner. Not to mention the numerous other big-eared residents of the elephant ice cream parlor. They'd long since stopped trying to refuse service to the fox, something he gleefully took full advantage of.

"That's  _one_ word for it, I suppose." Judy swallowed a scoop from her much more modest cup of carrot-flavored ice cream. "On the bright side, at least we've got something to go on. What about you? You and Finnick sort things out?"

Nick turned his paw horizontally and wiggled it a little. "Ehhhhh. It's complicated. I don't think he'll be trying to bash my skull in anymore at least." He slurped up more of the sundae, making Judy wince.

"I can't believe you're having donuts for breakfast and ice cream for lunch. You're going to kill your dietary habits eating like this."

"Thanks for the concern, Mom," he chuckled. "Though I should point out that I got you to eat here too."

"Only because you dragged me out here you dumb fox."

That's what he _expected_  her to say anyway. What she  _actually_  said was nothing at all. Confused by the break in their usual banter, Nick looked over to see Judy frozen mid-scoop, her mouth hanging open either in shock or to await the ice cream that never came. "You gonna finish that?"

Judy snapped back to her senses, but she simply put the scoop down instead of eating it. "Nick...did you just make a joke about your mom?"

He raised an eyebrow. "Yeah? Geez, Carrots, I know you don't like Finnick's 'yo momma' jokes, but I didn't think it went  _that_ far. I assure you, she doesn't mind."

That just seemed to throw her off even more.  _"Doesn't?"_

"Doesn't." Nick continued to stare at her, utterly baffled by his partner's behavior. He was so much more used to it being the other way around.

But as he kept watching, the bunny started to shift around nervously and avoid his gaze. He knew from experience that this was the look of a guilty mammal. That's when he finally pieced it all together. "...You thought my mom was  _dead_ , didn't you?"

Judy shot up like a spring. "W-What?! Of course not! Don't be silly!" She let out a loud, extremely forced, laugh.

"You did! You totally thought my mom was dead!" Nick laughed right back, making her cheeks heat up. By this point, they were starting to get some  _very_  curious stares from the other patrons. "No wonder you never come out for ZPD poker night. You'd lose all of your chips in minutes."

"Okay, fine!" Judy snapped, and immediately lowered her voice upon getting even more stares. "It's just that you've never really talked about her outside of that ride on the gondola, so I figured…"

Nick was still laughing. "So you figured she'd dropped dead of some mysterious ailment or loneliness or something?"

She didn't even bother answering this time, knowing she would only embarrass herself further.

After a few moments, Nick finally calmed himself down. "Okay, let me set the record straight. My mom is fine. She lives in a place called Happytown, do not let the name fool you, in the same apartment complex that I used to live in myself. I just decided to go off and live on my own, that's all."

That wasn't all. Not even close. But  _that_ was information even Judith Laverne Hopps didn't have privilege to. He couldn't even imagine how she would take it if she found out that the Junior Ranger Scout incident was only the first act in the screwed-up story known as his former life. Only that her attitude would change far too much for him to be comfortable with. The last thing he needed was pity.

"So speaking of parents, didn't you say that you just called yours? How are they doing?" Nick asked cheerfully.

Judy was so unused to him asking about her family that she fell for it hook, line, and sinker. "Oh, they're doing just fine! Apparently, Douglas got into the turnip stash again, and Susan still can't find a babysitter willing to look after her 87 children, but the Carrot Days festival is coming up soon, so…"

Topic successfully derailed. Another score for Nick Wilde.

He finished the sundae.

* * *

_Zootopia Police Department- Precinct 1_

_12: 45 PM_

"Alright, everyone, sit down so we can get this over with!" Chief Bogo ordered.

No one in the bullpen looked like they wanted to be there, including Bogo himself, but the reason for this sudden meeting was obvious. "I wouldn't normally call you all in like this, but recent circumstances have made it necessary. Let's discuss the Mr. Big case. Lights!"

Officer Fangmeyer flipped off the switch while Delgato wheeled in a projector. As Bogo pulled up a screen, an image of the half-frozen arctic shrew popped up in front of them, making several officers flinch. The chief was never the most delicate when it came to these things.

"For those of you who haven't been keeping in touch, one of the most powerful crime lords in the city was just found dead this morning. To summarize, Mr. Big is believed to have been murdered late last night based on the statement by our sole witness, his daughter, Fru Fru. However, the state of his body makes it difficult to pinpoint the time of death." He said that last part as if he had said it many, many times before. Judy could picture the many unsolved homicide cases likely perpetrated by the miniature crime boss.

"In addition, four of Mr. Big's bodyguards were also killed." With the click of a remote, the screen changed to show even more disturbing images better left undescribed. Seeing Judy's reaction, Nick playfully reached over and covered her eyes, making her bat his paw away. "They are all estimated to have been murdered between 11:00 and 11:30 that night. Assuming that Mr. Big was killed soon after, his death may also fall into that time-frame. No other members of the Mr. Big family were found on the premises."

Judy suspected that he was intentionally watching his wording to avoid any more smarmy puns. Probably for the best, as Nick badly looked like he was waiting to pounce on one, just like the predators of old. "As for the perpetrator…"

Bogo changed the image again. This time, it showed a rendering of the paw prints found in Big's office, along with a short analysis. "Thanks to these prints discovered by Officers Trunkaby and Hopps, who  _of course_  had to be there too," Nick stifled a laugh and Judy elbowed him, "we have identified our suspect as  _procyon lotor,_ the common raccoon. Furthermore, due to the arrangement of the prints, we also believe the suspect to have a prosthetic left leg."

A few quiet murmurs swept throughout the room. Even most of the officers who had been there had no idea about this finding. Judy saw Francine wink at her from across the room and shot a thumbs-up in return. "I bet you all think cracking this case is child's play now, don't you?" The room went silent instantly. They all knew the chief well enough to get the implications. "WELL IT'S NOT!"

He clicked the remote one last time, shutting off the projector. "Does anyone want to take a guess how many one-legged raccoons we found living within the boundaries of the city? Come on, any volunteers?" He got no takers.

None that he wanted anyway. "17!" Nick called out, waving his paw like he was on a game show. "No no, wait! 25! 33! 42!"

"ONE!" Bogo shouted back.

This made the room fall silent again, this time in bewilderment. "...Isn't that a good thing?" Wolford finally asked.

"Oh, it would be," Bogo said, deceptively calm, " _if_ that one didn't happen to be a 97-year-old with dementia living in Happy Habitats Retirement Home!"

Nick clapped his paws together. "Alright, let's go raid the place! We won't let him get away, sir!"

Bogo didn't even dignify that with a response, only signaling Fangmeyer to turn the lights back on. "From this, we can conclude that our suspect is either not a Zootopian citizen, or that he lacks such records for shadier reasons. Given that he's most likely a professional hitmammal or mercenary, I would lean more towards the latter." Bogo leaned over his podium, eyeing down the entire room at once. "Nevertheless, I want to make it clear that tracking this guy down is priority number 1! As you can imagine, the media is already swarming us about this, and the new mayor is especially livid about Mr. Big's murder."

"You're not reassigning all of us, are you?" Grizzoli asked, concerned.

"Yeah, that mystery arsonist needs to be stopped!" Delgato yelled, digging his claws into the desk. Nick sensed that their hunt for the elusive vandal had become personal.

"Relax, I am only reassigning Trunkaby's team to dive head-on into this, given the obvious connection to their former case," Bogo reassured them. "However, I do want all of you to keep on high alert. This is a bi-important issue and I consider it the responsibility of the entire department. Whatever you are working on, take the time to look into this. Search around here and there, question some neighbors, anything! Just get me some results! Dismissed!"

As the officers cleared out, Judy moved to get out of her seat, but Nick stopped her. "Wait for it."

"Wait for what?"

"Hopps and Wilde, you stay here!"

Nick smirked. "You're getting predictable, chief."

"Shut it!" Bogo snapped. "Both of you, come to my office. I have something special to discuss with you."

Judy looked at Nick, wondering if he had any idea what this was about. To her surprise, the fox was looking right back, just as clueless.

* * *

_Chief Bogo's Office_

_1: 06 PM_

With few exceptions, being called into this room was never a good thing for an officer. Even if it didn't mean outright punishment, there were always some harsh words thrown at anyone in the visitor's chair. And in those rare times when someone walked out of here with a promotion, it typically came with the not-so-encouraging vibe of "Don't screw this up." So when Nick and Judy sat themselves down in here, they were both pretty nervous about what they were in for. The fox hid it a lot better, maintaining his usual cool demeanor while counting the number of nose twitches from his partner.

He had almost reached triple-digits when Bogo finally cleared his throat and pulled out a case file. "Wilde, I just received the report from your interrogation of the drug dealer."

"Oh?" Nick kept up a facade of mild curiosity, but inside, he was screaming. Had Bogo found out about him and Finnick? If so, he doubted the chief would be pleased that he'd lied to him ("withheld the truth" technically, but he probably wouldn't care for that either). He knew there would be no serious consequences, but the chief could get very creative when it came to "light" ones.

"Would you like to know what I found out?"

"Sure," Nick replied, seeing mountains of paperwork in his future. Or maybe a few weeks of parking duty. Or parking duty  _while_ doing paperwork.

Bogo opened the file and jabbed a hoof into the center of it. "I found out the department's been slacking off! Feral Dream?! Why is this the first I'm hearing of it?!"

Phew. Disaster averted. "Beats me, sir. There must be some pretty irresponsible folks around here. It's a darn shame."

"Regardless of the reason, we now have a name for our Night Howler knock-off  _and_ a potential lead. You found out that the suspect received his job from a dingo named Fangs, correct?" Bogo looked over the report and nodded to himself, almost impressed. "Quite a detailed description you got out of him, Wilde. You're better at this than I thought you'd be."

Judy cut in before Nick could stroke his own ego any further. "What about the Mr. Big case? I noticed there are still some parts of it you didn't discuss, like the theory Officer Trunkaby and I had about...about..."

She found it hard to continue with the way Bogo was glaring at her. "About  _what?_ Need I remind you, Officer Hopps, that you aren't assigned to that case? I let you investigate the crime scene out of the goodness of my heart. Don't make me regret that decision."

"...Yes, sir." Judy looked down at her feet. "So I take it we're heading for Outback Island then?"

"Affirmative. It's our best lead on where to find this new suspect. If there's no issue, I expect you to depart immediately."

"Understood." Judy tensed up in her seat. Outback Island was a place she had never been before, which made her both excited at the chance to see more of Zootopia, and anxious because they weren't exactly going there on vacation. An unknown land meant unknown dangers.

Surprisingly, she wasn't the only one anxious. "Woah, hold on there, chief. We're talking about a little island out in the middle of nowhere that's only accessible by boat. You're just sending us out there without any backup?" Nick protested.

"I don't know what you're getting so worked up over. It's only a few miles from the main city and it's a perfectly friendly community filled with gift shops and local cuisine. It's not some lost island of the damned, unless you count all the tourists."

Nick didn't look convinced, but Judy relaxed a little. It didn't sound  _that_ bad. "I'm sure the ZPD must have a precinct on Outback too, right?" she asked, trying to reassure both her partner and herself.

Bogo pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. " _Technically_ , yes. Precinct 5 is stationed there. But they're a relatively small force and they prefer the rest of us to keep out of their business, as do the Outbackers in general. They'd sooner arrest you themselves than come to your aid."

Judy frowned. This was hardly the first time she had been in unknown territory, but without the safety net of being able to rely on the ZPD for backup, it became just a bit more frightening. "I'm guessing going in uniform would be a bad idea then."

"Unless you want to be chased off by angry locals, yes."

"Then we're really on our own out there." Judy took a deep breath. If that's how it had to be...

"Now I didn't say  _that._ "

Both fox and bunny looked at each other again, then back at him. "Whatcha talkin' bout, chief?" Nick asked suspiciously.

In response, the buffalo just reached over and pressed a button on his intercom. "Send them in."

* * *

_1:13 PM_

After a brief interlude of what mostly amounted to a staring contest between Nick and Chief Bogo, the door opened and in walked two uniformed officers they had never seen before.

One of them was an arctic fox, a bit shorter than Nick, with stark white fur and blue eyes. He was clearly younger than either of them, and smiled with a youthful energy that filled the room.

The other officer was a female hyena with brown and black spotted fur and fiery red eyes. She had pierced ears and bore a confident grin on her muzzle that told the world she was ready to rock.

"Hopps and Wilde, meet the newest members of the ZPD," Bogo announced.

Now they understood. The new recruits. With everything else that happened today, they had completely forgotten about them. "Officers Jimmy Frost and Carla Hyenandez reporting for duty!" the arctic fox said, saluting cheerfully.

"I can introduce  _myself,_ niñito!" Carla growled, looking ready to throttle the exuberant vulpine. She had an accent they couldn't quite place.

"Well, they certainly make an impression at least," said Nick.

"Wait, don't you already know these guys?" Judy asked, puzzled. "From the academy?"

He shrugged. "I was never gonna see most of those bozos again. I didn't bother getting too chummy with the future drop-outs."

She couldn't formulate a good response to that before she lost his attention.

"But now we have a hyena!" Nick said excitedly. "Finally, someone who can appreciate my natural wit." Ignoring a pointed look from Judy, Nick walked over to Carla and cleared his throat. "Hey, what do you call a hyena in a storage closet?"

"Nick, don't!" Judy whispered.

"A laughing stock!"

"Ugh." The bunny put her paws to her face. She could practically hear the rimshot.

Carla did not react, other than a slight twitch in her left eye.

Bogo was the one who laughed. "Heh, I like her already."

Nick turned around, his expression significantly darker than just a moment prior. "A hyena with no sense of humor. You sure know how to pick em', chief."

"I'm literally standing right behind you," Carla said, crossing her arms.

"Don't worry about Nick. He thinks he's clever, but he's actually just a big fuzzy idiot," Judy reassured her.

"I know the type."

"Nick Wilde!" He stiffened as the arctic fox, Jimmy Frost, suddenly appeared in front of him. "It's so cool to finally meet you in person! I was too shy to approach you back at the academy, but I'm, uh, kind of a fan," he said sheepishly.

"...Thanks?" He wasn't really sure  _how_ to respond to that so he just extended his paw and shook Jimmy's.

"You're the one who inspired me to join the ZPD, you know. You're like my role model."

Nick's hackles rose and he abruptly broke contact. "I'm no role model, kid. Trust me. But it's cool to see another fox on board regardless."

"Yes, so far he seems significantly less annoying than our last one," Judy said jokingly.

Bogo nodded. "Must be a newer model."

"Wow, guys. Just wow." Nick shook his head. "I don't think I deserve all of this abuse."

"Yes you do," Bogo said bluntly.

"While it's nice meeting the future of the ZPD," said Judy, shooting a smile at the duo, "I don't see what this has to do with our assignment."

"It's quite simple. Officers Frost and Hyenandez will be accompanying you to Outback Island."

Judy's ears perked up in surprise at that announcement, but Nick's reaction was a bit more pronounced. "WHAT?!" He cleared the room in a few strides and put his paws on the chief's desk. "You can't seriously be saddling us with the new guys!"

"You've been here a  _month_ , Wilde," Bogo countered.

Judy softly, but firmly, pulled Nick away. "Chief, no offense, but shouldn't on-the-job training be handled by more experienced officers?"

"Yes, yes it should," he agreed. "Unfortunately, it's out of my hooves. City Hall insisted that you two would be the most fitting candidates for the job. They figure it will be good for publicity if the 'heroes' of the Night Howler Incident be the ones to start training the next generation. Of course, we're talking about a bunch of pencil-pushers who've never had to lift anything more than ten pounds, so it's not like they  _really_ have any idea what goes on here." Bogo let out a loud snort, blowing hot air from his nostrils. The chief's love/hate relationship with City Hall was well-documented. "But they say train them so train them!"

"Alright, I get it," Nick conceded. "It's just that Carrots and I have such a strong team dynamic going and I don't want to have to deal with any more baggage."

"We're  _still_  here!" Carla shouted from behind him. "And don't you go underestimating me, Wilde! I took down guys twice your size back at the academy!" She glanced over at Jimmy. "And I'm sure this other guy is pretty decent too."

"Top of my class actually," he clarified with a smile, though his was perfectly innocent.

Not that Carla saw it that way. "That's it! You and me, in the sparring ring, let's go!"

Jimmy backed away, shielding himself with his paws. "Hold on, I don't want to fight you!"

"Too bad! Your bushy little tail is mine, punk!"

"No...no, I'm thinking 'baggage' was accurate," Nick said, rubbing his chin. "What about you, Cottontail?"

"Er…" Judy looked back and forth between the two clashing rookies. "I'm sure they will prove...useful...I hope."

"You're not judging the new recruits based on first impressions are you, Hopps?" Bogo asked, narrowing his eyes. "I can still put you back on parking duty you know."

"He's got you there," Nick admitted.

Sitting up straight, Judy put on her air of professionalism. "You're right. I  _know_  we can count on them. I'd bet my life on it!"

Nick watched Hyenandez put Frost in a headlock, while the smaller fox kept trying in vain to talk her down, his small voice almost inaudible over her screaming. "How about twenty bucks instead?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, three big things from this chapter:
> 
> First of all, Nick's mom. Many fans, including ourselves, indeed assumed that she was dead until Rich Moore confirmed otherwise, so that joke was just a little nod to that. And yes, we do intend for you to meet her...eventually.
> 
> Then there's Outback Island, which for those who don't know, is an unused location from the movie that's further elaborated upon in "The Stinky Cheese Caper." (Yes, I own a children's book for Zootopia, I admit it.) Those who are as geeky as us may have noticed that we altered the place a bit to be more in line with the original concept art, putting it to the far south of the city and only accessible by boat, as opposed to the far north with a big honking bridge to it. It felt more in-line with where the place would actually be, since otherwise it would be pretty plainly visible in the film itself.
> 
> Lastly, Frost and Hyenandez. You're probably wondering why the heck we decided to throw in two new characters to join up with Nick and Judy, especially since that kind of thing typically has "cheap self-insert" written all over it. Well, aside from just being foils, there are multiple plot-related reasons we included them that I, unfortunately, can't really go into right now. So just trust us on this, we have plans for them.
> 
> This about marks the end of the "beginning stuff". Things will be really picking up from here on out.


	6. Outback Stakeout

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who just got featured on ZNN? Like I even have to ask, since I'm pretty sure most of you have come from there now. Thank you so much, guys! And for those who don't know what ZNN is, it's pretty much my #1 resource for anything Zootopia. Might as well do a little return-plugging, so I encourage you to check it out.
> 
> This couldn't have come at a better time either. We are so stoked to start on Outback Island! This is going to be a multi-chapter arc, probably around 3-4 parts, where things start really picking up. A lot. Hope you enjoy.

****

**Chapter 6: Outback Stakeout**

_The Roomerang_

_2: 24 PM_

"Hey Carrots, I have a question."

"Yes?"

"What do you call  _two_ third wheels?"

"Nick…"

"I mean, you can't say 'four wheels', because that would just balance it out again."

"Nick!"

"What? I was just asking about tires on vehicles. I'm certainly not talking about the dead weight we're carrying."

"NICK!"

"What? I just meant these travel brochures we have to bring along. I'm certainly not talking about the big, festering load that got shoved down our-"

"Dios mio, Wilde, we are standing  _right here!"_

Nick looked over casually at Carla Hyenandez, who at this moment looked like she wanted to throw him overboard.

Getting to Outback Island was easy, albeit inconvenient. There was a ferry by the docks that traveled to and from the island by the hour. That gave them a good twenty minutes of sitting around just waiting for the thing to show up, followed by thirty more on an overcrowded boat.

Unfortunately, Nick's request to take a badass police motorboat instead had been turned down on account of being "too noticeable." To put that in perspective, the ferry they were now riding was known as the "Roomerang", an abomination that resembled a giant kangaroo doing a backstroke, with its belly as the deck and its pouch forming a canopy. The "mouth" opened at regular intervals to spout announcements and advertising in a goofy accent.

As if anything could be more noticeable than  _that._

"Not my fault you blend in with the background so well. Don't worry, that should help a lot on this assignment," Nick retorted, adjusting his tie. After swapping out of their uniforms back at the precinct, the group of four were all dressed in their casual clothes. Along with Nick and Judy's usual get-up, Jimmy Frost wore a simple blue shirt and beige shorts, while Carla went with jeans and a black jacket, plus a gold necklace. "Aside from you looking like a violent gang member that is."

"Get bent, Wilde."

Needless to say, all of this extra time and preparation hadn't done anything to make Nick more comfortable with the new recruits, and Judy was quickly getting tired of it. His usual banter was one thing, but ever since Jimmy and Carla joined them, it had slowly crossed the line between harmless ribbing and mean-spirited mockery. This was exactly the kind of attitude they could  _not_ have if they wanted to complete this assignment.

"Do I look okay, Officer Wilde?" asked Jimmy, either too excited or too naive to be offended. At least Nick hadn't destroyed the smaller fox's image of him yet, but it was only a matter of time.

"Sure, kid, you look great for an arctic fox trying to blend into the outback. They'll never see you coming."

The worst part was that she didn't even know what was causing this. Nick wasn't petty enough to get so bent out of shape over something as simple as training new recruits. There had to be more to it than that, like a lot of things surrounding the fox. But getting Nick to open up when it was just the two of them was hard enough. Around this many mammals, it would be a Furculean feat.

The Roomerang quickly ruined any chance of a serious discussion. " _Hooroo, mates! Enjoy yer stay on Outback Island! And remember, don't go home without grabbin' yer plunder from the land down under!"_

Judy leaned over the railing and sighed. Whatever was going on with Nick, she only hoped that it wouldn't cause any more trouble.

And fate had thus been tempted.

* * *

_Outback Island_

_Marsupial Marketplace_

_2: 36 PM_

The chief was right about one thing: Outback Island was a heck of a tourist trap.

It was no coincidence that the Roomerang happened to dock right in front of the island's largest collection of shops and kiosks, designed so that you practically  _had_ to walk through it to reach anything else. Heading into the large building, the group was instantly assaulted on all sides by "the Outback experience". As a former con artist, Nick found himself amused by how easily their fellow passengers were suckered in by cheap knick-knacks that probably wouldn't last a week. Forget fangs and claws; these guys were the  _real_  predators.

"For some hoppin' good fun, pick up yer Wallabeanies here! Now featuring the new 'Danger Didgeridoo' set! Collect them all!" A wombat shouted at them from a nearby stand, gesturing wildly to a collection of wallaby plushies that probably covered every range of size, shape, color, and occupation you could think of. Nick felt immense pity for anyone who had actually collected them all.

Carla ducked away from a blast of perfume shot at her from a kiosk. "Would you like a free sample, miss?" a make-up laden hedgehog asked after failing to force one on her. "It's called 'Eau de Outback'. It's our biggest seller."

She caught a whiff of the airborne perfume and winced. "So I can smell like this place  _all_ the time? Not interested." Carla glared at the kangaroo, daring her to try spritzing her again.

"Get a photo with Koala John, mascot of Outback Island!" a platypus yelled, pointing to what was very clearly someone in a koala  _costume,_ and one far too large to be worn by any actual koala at that. The marketing behind that decision would forever remain a mystery.

"Certainly seems like a...profitable place," Judy said politely. "I'm guessing this used to be one of your prime hang-outs, Nick?"

He waved a paw dismissively. "Nah, too easy. I always preferred a challenge. The mammals who actually buy all this junk have less willpower than any lemming I've ever met."

"Guys...help..."

They hadn't even realized Jimmy was missing until he suddenly reappeared, struggling to carry half-a-dozen Wallabeanies. A flower necklace was draped over his head, his pockets were stuffed with various themed snacks, colorful balloons were tied around his tail, and what looked suspiciously like an instant photograph was wedged between his toes. The arctic fox looked genuinely frightened. "I think this island is cursed."

"Nick, not a word," Judy warned.

"I wasn't gonna say anything."

Judy frowned at him, but there was more important business to attend to. "Okay, we officially need a game plan," she said, getting everyone's attention. "Even with our detailed description of the suspect, finding one specific dingo on this island is not going to be easy."

"Assuming he's even here," Nick added cynically.

"So does anyone have an idea?" she asked, ignoring him. Despite her wording, the question was directed mainly at Jimmy and Carla. Having been in their position once, she knew that all the two rookies needed was a chance to prove themselves.

"We could lay low in one spot," Carla suggested. "Keep a lookout and see if he passes by, then move in when he's at his most vulnerable."

"Spoken like a true scavenger," Nick remarked.

"I'll scavenge your-!"

"Hey, hey, that's not bad," Judy quickly interrupted. "But if our perp never comes by, we're pretty much out of options. Jimmy?"

"Uh...maybe we could try to find higher ground. Then we'd be able to get a better view of the whole island. I think I read about this big observatory in our travel brochure." He shifted around uncomfortably, evidently trying to get at his brochure. It was a futile effort, only making him drop a few Wallabeanies and a bag of Bunyip Rings. "...Just take my word for it."

"Interesting ideas, but if I may suggest another alternative." Nick casually pointed up at a security camera mounted on the wall.

Carla growled and crossed her arms, while Jimmy looked down at his pho-toe-graph. "Yeah, there's...there's that too..."

With a smile even more smug than usual, Nick turned on his heel and headed off towards the security office, seemingly unaware of the bunny furiously tapping her foot behind him.

"That is  _it!_  I am not taking any more of this!" Judy spun around, giving a forced smile to her colleagues. "Excuse me, I think I need to speak to my partner.  _Privately."_

Judy stormed off after Nick, leaving Carla to chuckle to herself. "This oughta be good."

* * *

_Security Office_

_2: 51 PM_

"NICK!"

Had she been in a better state of mind, Judy would have been a little more courteous to her fellow law officers by not kicking the door open. As it was, they were lucky she didn't break it.

Nick was facing away from her, staring up at the wall of monitors in front of him. A pudgy wombat sat in the chair next to him, probably the guard in charge of this station. He was the only one who noticed her come in as Nick seemed to be transfixed by whatever was on the screens. Undeterred, Judy composed herself as best she could and walked up behind him. "Alright, Nick, we need to talk about your attitude around the new recruits."

"Carrots…"

"Why can't you just give them a chance? I mean, Jimmy practically idolizes you, for reasons I'm really starting to question, and-"

"Hopps."

"And yeah, I get that Carla is a bit rough around the edges, but if you could just be a little nicer to her, then maybe-"

"Judy!"

The use of her real name stopped her tirade instantly. She had been conditioned to know that this single word meant serious business, and that unfortunately meant letting go of her anger with Nick. For now. "Don't tell me you already found our suspect."

"Not exactly," Nick said, pointing up at one particular screen. "But I found  _a_ suspect."

"What are you-?" Judy followed his clawed finger to the monitor and her eyes widened. "No way."

The screen showed a kiosk selling local newspapers and magazines. They watched as a raccoon in a brown aviator jacket purchased a paper and walked off...on one leg.

"What do you think, Fluff? I bet the chief's really gonna have a cow when he hears about this, and that's no bull." Nick paused to laugh at his own joke. "So you wanna go bag this guy?"

"No!" Judy yelled. "He isn't our assignment! We should call this in." Lacking her police radio, she reached for her phone.

Nick snorted. "And then what? No backup remember?" Judy stopped mid-dial. "Besides, even if you  _did_ manage to get someone else to come out here, how long do you think that's going to take? My guess: longer than it takes Captain Ringtail to get through the funny pages."

Judy looked back at the screens anxiously. The raccoon now appeared by another store, leaning casually against the wall and sifting through his paper. Just looking at this guy told her that he wasn't the type to sit still for very long. Not to mention that the very presence of a dangerous criminal in such a heavily-crowded place didn't sit well with her. She couldn't live with herself if he hurt anyone else under her watch. "Fine, but I'm still going to call this in first. I'm legally obligated to."

Nick just shrugged as Judy dialed the ZPD and reported the situation to Clawhauser. Even from this distance, he could hear the cheetah's loud "Oh em goodness!", followed by hysterical laughter. Judy waited a few moments for him to stop until she finally hung up. "Well, I reported it. Could be a while until we get a response."

"Told ya."

"In the meantime, we still have a dingo to find, so I suggest we split up."

"Fine with me," Nick smiled brightly. "So do we get dingo duty or stick it with the new guys?"

Judy suddenly remembered why she was angry with him. "Oh no you don't!" she said, jabbing a finger into his chest. "I think you need a reminder that this is a  _team_ effort. So Carla and I will go after the raccoon, you and Jimmy keep looking for our dingo."

"But-"

"No buts! I don't know  _what_  your problem is today, but I am not putting up with it anymore! Got it?!"

Nick looked away, his ears flattening against his head. "...Geez, Carrots. I think I liked it better when you just shouted my name indignantly."

"Nick!"

"Yeah, like that." Judy grabbed him by the arm and dragged him out of the room.

They left behind a very confused wombat, who was starting to wonder if he really should have let that fox in here. He sure didn't  _look_ like anyone from the ZPD, but he had definitely flashed a police badge, even if it did look a bit different from their design, and...

Crap.

* * *

_Marsupial Marketplace_

_3: 06 PM_

Carla wasn't exactly saddened by Judy's plan. "Good riddance. I could use a break from the big-mouthed pendejo."

"I'm standing right here," Nick said, unamused.

"Annoying, isn't it?"

"Let's get going," Judy stepped in yet again. "We can't afford to waste any more time."

"Fine," Nick said indifferently as Jimmy happily sidled up next to him.

"Let's go, Officer Wilde!" Jimmy grabbed him by the paw and pulled him away, because that was apparently the only way to get him moving now.

Judy nervously watched the two foxes leave the marketplace, not sure if this was really a good idea or not. A black paw slapped her on the back, catching her attention again. "Ready to rock, partner?" Carla asked, grinning.

"Y-Yeah, no problem."

If only she believed that.

* * *

_3: 09 PM_

It didn't take long for Jimmy's overabundance of Outback merchandise to start getting in the way.

It took even less time for Nick to dump it all into the nearest trash can. "There," he said, brushing the dust from his paws. "Now, maybe we can make it more than two paces without you dropping something."

"I'm still keeping this one," Jimmy said, wrapping his arms around a white Wallabeanie in snow gear, labeled the "Winter Warrior" Wallabeanie. "It speaks to me."

"You should see a therapist about that. Anyway, I believe you said something about an observatory?"

"Yeah!" Jimmy snapped back to normal instantly, his tail wagging in excitement. "Here, I'll show you!" He had no trouble pulling out his brochure this time and opened it up, pointing a claw at the image of a large domed building. The highest point on the island.

"I guess it's as good a place to start as any. Not bad, kid." Ignoring Jimmy's enthusiastic grin, Nick walked past him in the direction of the observatory. It took Jimmy a few seconds to realize this and catch up.

* * *

_Marsupial Marketplace_

_3: 11 PM_

"So who exactly is this guy we're after?" Carla asked softly as she and Judy searched the marketplace.

"Sorry, I forgot you weren't with us at the time. I'm sure you've heard about Mr. Big's murder, right?"

"Yeah, I just saw it the paper during lunch _: 'A Big Mystery Plagues Zootopia!'_ It's hard to miss."

As Judy scanned the crowd, she finally spotted the raccoon walking away from them, and her eyes narrowed as she now saw that same headline on the paper he was reading. She couldn't help but wonder if he was being cautious or just smug. "I'm guessing that's our guy?" Carla whispered. "What do we have on him?"

"So far, not much other than a set of weird footprints." She glanced down at his metallic peg leg thumping against the carpet. "But if forensics analyzes that leg and finds traces of polar bear blood on it, I'd say we've got a pretty solid case against him."

"Hmm." Carla nodded in agreement. "So what's our plan?"

"Let's tail him to a more secluded spot. It's way too crowded in here and I don't want anyone getting hurt if this turns ugly."

"And then we pound him into the dirt?" Carla smirked, cracking her knuckles.

"...Well, we should try to get him to come quietly first, but if it comes to that…"

"Didn't this guy kill like five mammals already? I have a pretty strong feeling it's gonna come to that."

Judy watched their suspect exit the building. "Most likely, yes."

With no other recourse, they went after him.

* * *

_Sky Eye Observatory_

_3: 20 PM_

By the time Nick and Jimmy climbed up the tall, grey building known as the Sky Eye Observatory, it became aparent that the location was perhaps a bit  _too_ high up. The building itself was cylindrical and decorated with artificial spines, the dome at the top shaped, somewhat distastefully, like a giant egg. Apparently, echidnas liked to remind everyone else of their rare status as egg-laying mammals. Weirdos.

"So what kind of stuff do you think they do here anyway?" Jimmy asked, looking around in wonder. "The brochure says it's for gazing out at the constellations over Zootopia."

"Sure it does," Nick said, significantly less impressed. "Though in my completely unbiased opinion, I say it's a front for spying on the Mainlanders. These guys were always a bit on the paranoid side."

"Really? Cool." That wasn't even sarcasm. So far, Jimmy Frost was hitting a perfect 0 on the witty banter scale.

"Let's just...take a look already."

The observatory's prime telescope was both unavailable for public use and complete overkill, so the vulpines padded over to the observation deck and each took position in front of one of the numerous binoculars that lined the railing. Coin-operated and added purely for use by tourists of course.

Nick reluctantly slid a coin into the slot. Even giving them _this_  much made him feel unclean. "Okay, let's see what we've got here." Through the eyes of the binoculars, he slowly surveyed the community below, focusing his search on the distinctive sand-colored fur of a dingo. Naturally, he found several. "No...no...not him...no...not that one either...not itchy enough...no...maybe that one...nope, that's a girl...no…"

"Oh, hey!" Jimmy called out excitedly.

Nick lifted his head to look at him. "You found our guy?"

"No, but it looks like the rap group  _Pimpin' on the Barbie_  is about to put on a show downtown! Looks like fun!"

"Can we try to focus, please?" Nick asked, rolling his eyes. He turned back to the binoculars, only to hear the sharp click that roughly translated to, "Pay up, sucker."

Or in this case, "Pay up, wanker."

With a slight growl, Nick popped another coin into the machine and continued looking. "No...no..."

"Woah!"

"Yes, Jimmy?"

"There's a book-signing with David Mahoof!"

"Jimmy!"

"Sorry, I'm just a fan."

Nick leaned down again. "No...no...wait, did he have a mohawk? I think I remember a mohawk…?"

"Hey, you can see all the way over to the mainland with this thing! I think I can see my house from here!"

"Then please, by all means,  _go home_." Nick shoved himself away from the binoculars. "It's not like you've been such a great help over here."

Jimmy's tail drooped. "I-I'm sorry, I'll look harder." He went to look through his machine again, only to have the shutters close in his face. He pulled out his wallet for another coin, but found it empty. "Oh...guess I spent all of my money at the marketplace."

"Surprising no one."

His ears flattened and he looked to the ground. "I really screwed this one up, huh. I'm really sorry, I just...I just wanted to spend some time with you, you know?"

"No, actually I don't."

He looked up in surprise. "What?"

Nick gave him a hard stare. "To be honest, I have a question for you, kid." He stepped towards him, making Jimmy take a step back instinctively. "Do you actually care about this major smuggling ring case we're on, or is this all just an excuse to hang out with Nick Wilde?"

Jimmy didn't get the chance to answer before he cut him off. "Actually, I have a better question.  _Why_ do you want to hang out with Nick Wilde?"

"I-I don't know what you-"

"Didn't you say I was the one that inspired you to join the ZPD? Correct me if I'm wrong, but if you just joined, that means I've been on the force exactly  _one month_ longer than you have." By this point, he was so close their snouts were nearly touching. His voice dropped lower, taking on a scrutinizing tone. "And so far, all I've done is bag petty criminals and screw over one of my best friends. So tell me, kid, just what is it about me that's  _so freaking inspiring?!"_

Jimmy flinched away, unable to look him in the eye. He kept opening his mouth to respond, but no words would come out.

Nick turned away and scoffed. "Yeah. That's what I thought."

He took a few paces across the room, trying to decide on their next move. This one clearly wasn't working out. He tried his best to get along, but there was something about this kid that just got under his skin. He couldn't even explain what it was and that bothered him more than anything.

Coming to a decision, he pulled out his phone and sent a text to Judy to meet up with them. "Let's just go find Carrots. Knowing her, she'll probably have the guy in cuffs already. What do you think, Jimmy?"

When he turned back around, the arctic fox was nowhere in sight.

"...Jimmy?"

* * *

_Sheila's Café_

_3:17 PM_

"Hold on, I think he's stopping."

Judy and Carla watched from a distance as their raccoon suddenly turned into an outdoor café and took a seat. "Killers have to eat too, I guess," said Carla.

"Then how about we join him?"

Trying not to catch the suspect's attention, the two undercover officers filed in behind him and sat a fair distance away, but still close enough for some efficient eavesdropping. He didn't seem to notice them, but a waitress did. A perky kangaroo hopped over, pulling menus from her pouch and laying them on the table. "G'day! What can I get you two this fine avro?"

"Just some water, please," Judy replied, trying not to lose sight of the mission. The waitress nodded and hopped off, allowing them to see the raccoon again. It seemed he had gone for an Outback-style red wine instead.

Minutes later, Judy and Carla slowly sipped their water and shielded themselves with their menus, watching as the raccoon proceeded to order a bowl of Sweet Seafood Soup. "Is there a reason we're not arresting him yet?" asked Carla, getting impatient.

"Look at him," Judy said simply. "He's too alert right now. See the way he's just glancing around at his surroundings? He makes it look so relaxed and casual, but I know better. Those are the instincts of a professional killer." The raccoon smiled softly to himself as his bowl of soup was presented to him. "He probably even senses that we're here right now. We need to proceed cautiously if we want any chance of catching this guy off-guard." He dipped a spoon into his soup, blew on it a few times, and lifted it slowly to his mouth. "Or maybe some kind of distraction."

Then his phone went off.

Judy's ears burned as their professional killer burst into a stream of profanity that ended with his spoon being chucked across the table. Despite the strong reaction, he answered the phone anyway. "I don't know how, but you're doing this on purpose," he growled.

"That looks distracted enough for me," Carla said, putting down her menu and rising from her seat.

Judy nodded silently and signaled for them to spread out. They moved slowly around the restaurant, approaching the suspect from opposite sides. As they did, Judy trained her sensitive ears on the raccoon, listening in on his conversation. Unfortunately, they still weren't sensitive enough to pick up whoever was on the other end.

"Shouldn't you be bothering Sang right now? I'm just the backup this time."

Carla crept around a table, briefly stopped to hide behind a large boar, then continued forward.

"For the last time, I did what you said, alright? I know what I'm doing, thank you very much. Even if they  _were_ after me, I bet their trail has already gone cold."

Judy slipped underneath a table, maneuvered through a few pairs of legs, and emerged from the other side, unnoticed.

"Yes, like Mr. Big. That was very cute, sir. But unlike you, I prefer to get straight to the point, so just tell me what I should be doing right now."

Judy and Carla came in close, sneaking up on the raccoon's backside.

"Behind me? I'm  _trying_ to put this behind me, but I...wait…"

That was all the warning they got before the raccoon suddenly whirled around and flung his soup into Carla's face.

The hyena stumbled back, covered in surprisingly-cold soup, and the raccoon took the chance to sweep her legs out from under her. Judy quickly reached for her tranq gun, but she wasn't quick enough. The raccoon grabbed her by the wrist and thrust a palm into her chin, knocking the weapon from her grip, then threw her across the flat tabletop. The bunny landed on the opposite side, but kicked up with her powerful legs, toppling the whole table on top of him.

"Ha! Gotcha!" Carla yelled, grabbing the stunned raccoon and putting him in a chokehold.

"No." He shot an elbow into her ribcage, then grabbed her by the arm and flipped her over his shoulder, right on top of the fallen table. She couldn't tell if the resulting cracking noise came from wood or bone.

The raccoon lifted the phone up to his ear. "I'm going to have to call you back." He hung up. "But I won't."

Judy flew at him with a kick, which hit him in the chest and staggered him. He recovered faster than expected and sidestepped a second kick, spinning around to land one of his own to her shin. Judy collapsed onto one knee, struggling to get back up again.

"Too slow." She only just glimpsed the raccoon's dark smile before he sent his metal leg into the side of her head. Then she saw nothing but black.

* * *

_3: 29 PM_

To Judy's embarrassment, her first thought upon regaining consciousness was wondering if her own blood would taint the evidence.

"Owww…" she groaned, putting a paw to her head. As her eyes regained focus, she could see the restaurant, thoroughly trashed, and Carla Hyenandez, likewise. The hyena was crouched over top of her, shaking the bunny awake.

"What...happened?" asked Judy weakly.

"He got away." As much as she missed Nick, she appreciated the non-sarcastic answer. "But to be more specific, first he punched me in the throat, and then used what I can best describe as a Moose Lee chop. I'm starting to see how this guy took down Mr. Big."

Judy unsteadily got back to her feet and looked around. Unsurprisingly, there was no one else still at the café, including the suspect. "I take it the owner wasn't happy?"

"Oh, she went completely loca," Carla confirmed. "I had to tell her who we were to avoid getting arrested, but we can expect a bill for the damages."

She nodded. "It's fine. Probably the best outcome we could've gotten." Aside from actually catching the suspect of course.

It was then that she noticed the new text message on her phone:

_"Hey, ^s. Thngs didn't wrk out so hot. Let's meet up n the mrktplace. c ya."_

"Ugh. Nick's text lingo is his one crime I'll never forgive."

Carla glanced at the screen. "So what should we do?"

"Might as well go along with it," she said, sending a return text. "He couldn't possibly have done any worse than us."

* * *

_Marsupial Marketplace_

_3:38 PM_

"What do you mean you  _lost Jimmy?!_ "

Nick saw it coming and it still scared the crap out of him. He backed away, paws in front of his face defensively. "Woah, hold on there. It's not like I ditched him or something. He just sorta...disappeared."

"And I'm sure that has absolutely nothing to do with you, right?" Judy asked, her foot already going a mile a minute.

Nick knew that the right thing to do here was fess up and tell them what happened. Unfortunately, he had already been through a very long and frustrating day and his natural stubbornness won out. "Hey, I tried to tell you that pitting me with the kid was a bad idea."

Not at all the right thing to say. "So this is  _my_ fault?!"

"If the proverbial shoe fits."

Judy stood up on her toes, getting in his face. "Oh, that is  _so_ like you! Why can't you just admit you were wrong for once?!"

"It's not like you've done the greatest job either! Or should I ask Ms. Sheila about you and Giggles trashing her restaurant and letting the perp escape?!"

"That was not Carla's fault!"

"Hey, I'm pretty sure he was talking about you too!" Carla joined in.

Judy whirled around on her. "I'm just trying to stick up for you!"

"I can fight my own battles, Hopps!"

"What, like the battle between your voice and the local peace ordinance?" asked Nick.

"Bite me, Wilde!"

"Sure! Where do you want it? The funny bone?"

"Leave her alone, Nick!"

"I said knock it off, Hopps!"

Fate had been tempted, and it had responded. Boy, had it ever responded.

* * *

_Somewhere?_

_3: 35 PM_

Jimmy Frost wasn't even sure where he was anymore. Just another sign of how much he'd screwed up today.

He hadn't intended to get lost, really. Even if his personal hero had pretty much just told him to. He just needed a little alone time to get over the rejection. That was understandable, right? He would just go outside, clear his head, and come back fresher than before.

Either clearing his head took more time than he thought, or he just couldn't stop himself from wandering, but he somehow ended up halfway across the island before he felt ready to go back. It was then he learned that travel brochures didn't necessarily make very good maps. He held the thing out in front of him, trying to make sense of the directions, but all he really got out of it was that the Marsupial Marketplace was all the way to the south, marked by a giant koala head and the words, "G'day, consumers!"

Jimmy was so preoccupied with trying to find his way back that he failed to look forward, bumping into another mammal in the middle of an alleyway. "Oi! Watch where yer goin', mate!"

"Sorry!" Jimmy hastily apologized, lowering the brochure. The other mammal was a lanky dingo, his paws stuffed into the pockets of his shorts, glaring at him through dark brown eyes. The canid gave a slight growl in response, then continued past him.

Jimmy took a few more steps, then looked back. That dingo seemed awfully familiar. Brown eyes, jacket and shorts, old sweaty smell, and…

The dingo pulled one paw out and scratched at his jacket.

Mind. Blown.

"H-Hey, hold on a minute!" Jimmy called out. "Are you Fangs?"

He turned back around, narrowing his eyes suspiciously. "Who wants ta know?"

Jimmy took a deep breath. No problem. He'd been trained for this. Top of his class. He could do it. Definitely. Of course.  _Just do it already!_

"The ZPD!" he announced, pulling out his badge. "You're under arrest, drug runner!"

"Woah!" Fangs stepped back, eyes wide. "Easy there, mate. Let's not get hasty. We dingoes have a bad enough reputation, what with folks accusin' us of child cannibalism. We don't need any of this Feral Dream crock!"

"I didn't say what drug it was."

"...Piss."

"You can discuss this further with the boys down at the station. Let's go!"  _Yes! Nailed it! Now what's next...oh right, the rights!_

Jimmy cleared his throat. "You have the right to remain silent. Anything you...uh, sorry, first arrest. I'll start over. You have the right to-"

*THWACK*

The arctic fox dropped to the ground like a sack of bricks, much like the one that had just bashed him over the head.

"Let me finish that for ya, mate. You have the right to remain silent... _forever._ " Fangs walked over and gave him a light kick to the head, making sure he was out cold. "Good work, Boomer."

"Don't patronize me," said a large kangaroo in shorts, a sweater vest, and a bowler hat. "Anyone can whack a bloke in the head. It's not that special."

Fangs bent down and snatched up Jimmy's dropped police badge. "Hold on a minute," he said, inspecting the badge. "This fruit loop isn't from  _our_ ZPD. He's from the mainland!"

Boomer barely reacted. "Well, that's just right bollocks, isn't it?"

"The rightest." With some difficulty, Fangs draped the unconscious fox over his shoulder. "Let's take him to Mr. Thornbrush." He growled and scratched himself with his free paw. "And quickly! I can't stand bein' out here for much longer."

"Suck it up. I'm uncomfortable too." Boomer tugged on the neck of his sweater vest.

"Least ya don't get itchy," he grumbled, continuing to scratch.

Boomer peered behind him, checking for witnesses. "Alright, looks like we're in the clear. I'll bring the van around."

"Why don't ya just stuff him in yer pouch?"

The roo turned around slowly, trembling with years of resentment as his eyes lit up in pure, fiery rage. "For the last time, I am a  _male_ kangaroo! I. Don't. Have. A. POUCH!"

"Alright, alright. I'm just ribbin' on ya, mate."

Boomer huffed and hopped away, Fangs dragging Jimmy after him.

Neither of them noticed the single white Wallabeanie that fell from his pocket, now lying abandoned in the middle of the alleyway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We formally apologize to any Australians reading this. Just know that when we make a ridiculous parody of your country, we do it out of love.
> 
> So what do you guys think of Outback Island, or more accurately, this specific interpretation of it? Because while some of this stuff is taken from The Stinky Cheese Caper (Marsupial Marketplace, Eau de Outback, and Sheila's Café), I'm proud (?) to say that everything else comes from the twisted imaginations of myself and Mind Jack, including the idea to make it into a giant tourist trap for gullible Mainlanders. Can't have enough fun with consumerism!
> 
> When we dropped Simon's name back in Chapter 4, it was so we wouldn't have to keep calling him "the raccoon" anymore. Yeah, that sure worked out, huh? Dang perspective shifts.
> 
> Lots of internal conflict going on here, which will be a recurring theme for this arc. Gotta start somewhere, right? Hope you didn't find Nick too much of a jerk here, but if you did, well that was kind of the point. All will be explained in due time.
> 
> ...I can't be the only one who totally wants a Wallabeanie now, right?


	7. Exposed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part 2 of Outback Island, wherein things come together in ways you may or may not expect.

****

**Chapter 7: Exposed**

_Outback Island_

_Didgeridoo Avenue_

_4: 16 PM_

"This is a complete disaster!" Judy was near-panicking as she searched up and down another block with no success. "How did we go from looking for  _one_ mammal to  _three?!"_

For once, Nick kept his mouth shut and fought down the urge to reply with something snarky. "You could have at least gotten his phone number!" Judy continued. "We're going to be knowing him for a while! Or...I hope so anyway…"

 _I didn't see you adding him to_ your _Furbook either,_ was the retort he kept himself from saying. His big mouth had gotten him into enough trouble today. It was time for it to take a rest.

And it wasn't like Jimmy Frost would be inclined to answer a call from him anyway.

"Shouldn't we be reporting this?" Carla asked, checking behind a building.

"Technically, he doesn't qualify as missing until he's been gone more than twenty-four hours," Judy rattled off like a textbook. "Besides, I'd really rather not have to explain to Chief Bogo how we managed to  _lose_ one of our trainees."

Nick smiled softly. It was nice to know that, even after all the trouble he'd caused, Judy still had his back. Did he deserve it? Probably not, but the thought was comforting.

"Anyway, everyone we've talked to said Jimmy came around here, so there has to be something…"

Judy froze as she came to an alleyway, her eyes drawn to the small object lying in the center. The lone Wallabeanie wouldn't have caught her attention if not for the fact that it was white and dressed in snow gear. "Nick?"

The fox came up behind her, recognizing the object instantly. "Oh crap. That's his alright. I remember him clutching that little money-stealer like it was his only child."

"Maybe he just dropped it?" Judy suggested hopefully.

"You don't just 'drop' things in a dark alley." Nick went to pick up the Wallabeanie and leaned in, sniffing at it. His paw clenched around the plushie as he let out a low growl. "Dingo."

She swallowed. "You think Fangs...kidnapped him?"

He didn't respond, but his suddenly slumped posture was all the answer she needed. "Nick…"

"This is my fault," he finally said, more to himself than her. "I chased him away and now he's been taken. If something happens to him…" He didn't want to finish that thought.

Judy was already reaching a sympathetic paw towards him. "Nick, it's not-"

"Hey, you guys find where the kid ran off to yet?" asked Carla, appearing abruptly from around the corner. "We really need to find him before he ends up as roadkill."

"Carla!" Judy hissed, pointing to where Nick was standing.

"What?" The hyena's eyes fell on the Wallabeanie. "...Oh."

The three of them stayed silent for a while. Nick kept standing there, just staring at the Wallabeanie, Carla scraped at the wall with her claws, and Judy put a finger to her chin, trying to come up with a plan.

She didn't like what she decided on. "We don't have a choice. We're going to have to tell Chief Bogo about this. Maybe he can make an exception, send out another team, or work something out with Precinct 5-"

"No."

Distracted as he was, Nick was still paying attention.

"We don't have any more leads!" Judy insisted. "All we know is that he came here. If anyone witnessed a kidnapping, they would have told us."

"Debatable, but not the point." Nick turned around, walking back towards them. "There might be another way we can find him."

"Like what?" Carla challenged.

Nick hesitated. Was he really about to do this? Ever since they got here, he had been desperately hoping they could just find this dingo and go home. He didn't want it to get any more complicated than that. He didn't want to have to deal with  _him._

But now he had little choice in the matter. "I know a guy."

* * *

_A Dirty White Van_

_3: 45 PM_

"And then she says, 'That's not me tail, that's me husband!'" Fangs banged a paw against the steering wheel as he burst into laughter.

"Hilarious," Boomer replied flatly, leaning against the window. "Are we there yet?"

"Now don't  _you_ start gettin' impatient! I'm  _dyin'_ over here!" Fangs took one paw off of the wheel to scratch at his jacket. "Can't get back to the club fast enough."

"Paws on the wheel."

"You've got no sympathy, mate." Fangs reluctantly put his paw back, groaning in discomfort. "Why do  _I_ have to drive anyway?"

"Because my feet are too big to use the pedals," Boomer said, leaning back in his chair with said feet pressed against the glove compartment. "Now drive."

A sudden banging came from the back of the van. "Sounds like the dobber's awake."

"Hey, pipe down back there!" Fangs yelled. "Yer not goin' anywhere, so ya might as well get comfortable!" He shook himself roughly, trying to relieve the intense itching. "More comfortable than  _me_  at any rate. Hey Boomer, could ya give me a scratch?"

"No!"

In the back of the van, Jimmy tried again to bang himself against the back doors, seeing if he could bust them open somehow. It wasn't the best plan, and was significantly lacking in foresight, but it was the only one he had. His wrists and ankles had both been bound with thick rope and a gag was forced into his mouth, leaving the arctic fox as little more than a writhing lump.

His first day on the job certainly could have gone better. At least he had learned an important lesson from this ordeal: Being top of your class didn't mean squat out on the field. If that arrest had been a training exercise, he would've gotten pretty high marks, except perhaps a slight docking for messing up the rights. Instead, he got a brick over the head. The academy didn't have a class on "Perp attacks you with blunt object while arresting another perp", but clearly it should have. He would have to write to them about this later.

Those were the kinds of thoughts he kept himself occupied with, to avoid thinking about the very real possibility that he wasn't going to make it out of this alive. Call it a defense mechanism, but in hindsight, he was grateful for it.

_Now I just have to fashion a way out of here. How do you untie ropes when you can't use your fingers, toes, or tongue? Dang, the academy didn't teach me that either!_

And so he just banged against the door again.

* * *

_Didgeridoo Avenue_

_4: 22 PM_

"His name is Damien Thornbrush," Nick explained. "He's an old...associate of mine."

"Meaning criminal," Judy translated. "But who is he exactly?"

"He's the guy who calls the shots around here."

"The governor?"

Nick laughed and shook his head. "Oh, Carrots, Carrots, Carrots. Still so much to learn."

"I take it you mean 'calls the shots' in a less legal sense?" Carla asked sardonically.

"Yep," he answered bluntly. "Thornbrush is the local crime lord of Outback Island. Like Mr. Big, not Mr. Big." He noticed Judy's horrified expression. "Except that this guy actually  _likes_ me. All I have to do is call in a favor and I'm sure he'll help us find Jimmy in no time."

"Oh…lovely," said Judy, still not exactly thrilled about mingling with another of Zootopia's worst.

"Hate to state the obvious, but you do realize there's a good chance this is the very guy who took him in the first place?" Carla pointed out.

Nick's tail twitched. "Well, that just makes it easier then, doesn't it?"

"You mean  _aside_ from the fact that you're a cop now?" she asked skeptically. "Your little shift of allegiances isn't exactly a secret, on either end."

He put a paw on her shoulder. "Relax, we're just going to get some information. If that information happens to lead to something incriminating, we can take it from there."

"Don't touch me."

He took his paw away, but only because he wanted to. "Anyway, Thornbrush runs a fancy disco club a fair distance away from here. It's gonna be a long drive, so we better get moving if we want to get there in time." He was heading out of the alley before he even finished talking.

"Just one thing." Judy hopped in his path, glaring at him suspiciously. "Is there a reason you didn't mention any of this up until it became a literal case of life and death?

Nick swore to himself. He was  _really_ hoping that wouldn't come up. "...You didn't ask?"

"Or maybe you just didn't want us looking into your good buddy Thornbrush," Carla said accusingly.

Judy let out a loud sigh of frustration, rubbing her temples. "Forget it. Let's just go. Saving Jimmy is what's important here. We can deal with... _this_ afterward."

She went out on the street to call a cab, not even waiting for directions first. Nick went to join her, but was stopped by Carla. "I just want to make one thing perfectly clear. Hopps may trust you, but  _I_ don't," she growled. "You might be here to 'train' me, but give me an excuse to report your smarmy ass and I will! Comprende?"

"Whatever you say, Chuckles." She snarled and stormed off.

As he watched Judy and Carla hail the cab, Nick tried to hide how anxious he really was, though his rapidly twitching tail gave him away. Quirky as they were, he was looking at two noble and dedicated law officers, with relatively clean backgrounds and a willingness to do what needed to be done in the name of justice.

For the first time since joining the ZPD, Nick was starting to wonder if perhaps  _he_ was the third wheel.

* * *

_5: 03 PM_

It was a long drive indeed, made longer by the unsettling silence that pervaded the inside of the taxi. It was a three-way communication blackout. Judy was too frustrated to talk, Nick didn't trust his own mouth enough, and Carla was simply too antisocial to care. It got to the point where even the driver was all too happy to get rid of them, barely even remembering to wait for his payment.

As they exited in front of Thornbrush's disco club, Judy finally found some words. "Nick...seriously?"

"Okay, in my defense, I didn't remember the name."

The trio looked up at the giant neon sign hanging above the building, flashing on and off.

Dream Time

"It could be a coincidence." Judy and Carla both glared at him. "Yeah, I'm not even convincing myself with that," he admitted. "Let's just go inside and get this over with."

It wasn't that simple though. A pair of wombats in baggy clothes stood guard at the entrance. They seemed docile enough, but woe betide anyone who underestimated the small, yet vicious creatures. "What about those bouncers?" Judy whispered.

"They better not try searching us," Carla said uneasily, her paw slipping around the badge in her pocket.

"Just let me do the talking." Nick straightened his tie and stepped toward them, putting on a ridiculously stuck-up accent. "Good evening, gentlemammals. My compatriots and I are here to sample your fine establishment. May we peruse the premises?"

One of the wombats raised an eyebrow. "Say what, mate?"

"Talk like a normal bloke, will ya?" said the other.

Wrong crowd. Nick coughed, quickly shifting into an equally fake Outbacker accent. "G'day-er, night! I've come with me posse to enjoy this 'ere rip snorter of a party and get rotten til' we pass out in a pile a' chunder!"

The two wombats looked towards each other quizzically, then back at him. They didn't look happy.

"Alright, come on in. Just don't cause any trouble."

Then again, wombats  _never_ looked happy.

"Cheers," Nick said, giving them a short wave as he led the others inside. They traveled down a long corridor, leading into the main part of the club. "You see? No problem."

"I don't know," Judy said, looking back over her shoulder uneasily. "I'm not sure those guys were convinced. I think they might be on to us."

"Nah, they're just sore because they're not allowed to follow their own dress code." Nick barely took notice as they walked past a seemingly out-of-place locker room. "FYI, we're not following it either, but they can't legally kick us out over it."

"What? Don't establishments like this have the right to enforce a dress code?"

"Not establishments like  _this._ " They reached the end of the corridor and emerged into the club itself.

Dream Time consisted mainly of a wide dance floor, covered in flashing lights from the ceiling above. Several large disco balls hung in place, adding to the seizure-inducing effects. The perimeter was lined with cushy booths and seats for patrons to get a drink in-between partying, and a sizable VIP lounge could be seen sitting in the center of the room. Not to mention the almost-deafening sound of disco music that covered the entire space.

Yet Judy and Carla didn't notice any of this, far too distracted by the literal party animals dancing freely around the room.  _Very_ freely.

Nick watched their slack-jawed expressions for a while, then pulled out his phone and snapped a picture. A lot of mammals would call him a masochist at this point. Even after he was already in trouble for keeping secrets, he still hadn't told them everything about Damien Thornbrush, including one very relevant detail.

Why? Because it was hilarious of course. "Oh yeah, did I forget to mention that he's a naturalist?"

His words shocked them out of their daze, and they suddenly registered the fact that this club was almost entirely filled with dancing, naked animals.

"My eyes!" Carla shouted, covering her face.

"No no no no no, not again!" Judy looked like she was undergoing some kind of PTSD.

And Nick just laughed. "Guess I did. Good thing we don't have to go undercover, huh? Or should I say  _not_ under cover?"

Carla's eye twitched. "Wilde. Explain."

"In short, Damien used to be a member of the Mystic Spring Oasis, but they kicked him out for 'unsavory practices' that you'd probably rather I don't go into." They swiftly nodded in agreement. "Anyway, he pretty much isolated himself to Outback Island ever since. Last I saw him, he was trying to make a cheap profit off of self-styled merchandise, but it seems he's moved up in the world."

Nick shot his signature smirk and took a step forward. "But that's okay, because so have I."

Carla was not impressed. "Hmph. So what are we going to do about your nudist pals?"

"Simple. I'm going to meet with Thornbrush and see if I can negotiate Jimmy's release."

"By yourself?" they both asked, for decidedly different reasons.

He nodded solemnly. "I'm the only one he'll talk to. Don't worry, it'll be fine." He crouched down to Judy's level so he could look her square in the eyes. "Look, I know you don't have a lot of reasons to trust me right now. I lost one of our rookies, I hid a lead from you, and I've just been an all-around jerkface since we got here." He put a gentle paw on her cheek. "But I made this mess, so I gotta be the one to clean it up. That's only fair, right Judy?"

She stayed silent, but slowly nodded.

"Good." He patted her on the head comfortingly. "See you soon, Carrots. In the meantime, go bust a move." Nick pointed over to the dance floor and walked off.

Judy took one look over there, cringed, and decided she was going nowhere near it. "Maybe we should just find a table instead. Grab a drink, non-alcoholic naturally, and keep an eye on Nick from a distance. What do you think, Carla?"

When she turned back around, the hyena was nowhere in sight.

"...Carla?"

Wow, so _that's_  what it felt like.

* * *

_Dream Time_

_5: 14 PM_

Screw this.

Carla Hyenandez stomped through the crowd of dancing animals, knowing that Hopps wouldn't look too hard for her in there. A job was a job, but there was only so much of Wilde she could take. She didn't put much stock in his ability to free Jimmy from the Outback crime lord, and since Hopps seemed to be wrapped around his finger, it was up to her to come to the kid's rescue. There would probably be consequences for this, but right now she didn't care. Wilde got her in this mess and now he was just going to have to sit back and watch her do things  _her_ way. Or hear about it at least.

As she reached the back end of the club, she spotted a single door with an "Employees Only" sign. The perfect place to hide a kidnapping victim.

Of course, the sign wasn't the only thing keeping her out, as another pair of wombats stood guard. At the risk of sounding specist, they looked identical to the last pair except for a distinct lack of clothing. Wilde had talked his way in before, but she preferred a more direct approach. Before the two wombats could so much as say a word, Carla grabbed them by the sides of their heads and bashed their skulls together. She glanced back to see if anyone had noticed that, but everyone else was too busy flaunting themselves to care.

With a small grunt, Carla stepped over the unconscious guards and slipped inside.

* * *

_VIP Lounge_

_5: 15 PM_

Nick refused to look back, afraid that he would lose his nerve if he did. This was exactly why he wanted better backup than two even less experienced cops, but would Chief Bogo listen? No, of course not! Now he had to face the most dangerous criminal on the island with just Judy and Hair-trigger Hyenandez at his back. He  _wished_ he was as calm about this as he had led them to believe. Truthfully, any result that didn't end with him dead would be exceeding his expectations.

The VIP lounge was a small area separate from the madness surrounding it. It's only perimeter was a ring of couches, but he knew from experience that no one who walked in here without permission got to walk back out again. The single opening to this ring was guarded by a kangaroo dressed in nothing but a bowler hat, who immediately held out a paw to stop him as he approached. "Hold up there, mate. This is Mr. Thornbrush's private lounge. Invitation only."

Nick casually smoothed down the fur behind his head. "Just tell him Nick Wilde is here to catch up," he said, resisting the urge to flash his police badge. That would be a tremendously bad idea right now.

The kangaroo leaned in close, making him flinch. These guys always had a very poor sense of personal space, which wasn't particularly surprising in hindsight. "Nick Wilde...that name sounds familiar…" He put a finger to his chin, trying to place him. Nick struggled to keep his expression neutral.

"Nicky, is that you?" another voice called from behind him. "Well, I'll be a marsupial's uncle! Let him in, Boomer!"

The roo reluctantly stepped aside and let Nick walk inside the lounge. There were two other mammals in here with him. He almost could've laughed at the fact that one of them was undoubtedly Fangs. He'd spent all afternoon looking for this guy, but he never thought he would find him lying naked on a couch, rolling around on the cushions blissfully. "No more itchin! Oh sweet relief, no more itchin!" He didn't even seem to notice him.

But Nick was no longer concerned with the dingo. He seated himself in one of the other couches, looking over at the diminutive figure sitting in a large chair at the center of the room, backlit by an  _enormous_  disco ball hanging directly above him. He always  _was_  a bit of a show-off.

He seemed friendly enough so far. Might as well return the sentiment. "Damien! How's my favorite koala?"

"I am  _not_ a koala!" snapped the koala, glaring at him through squinty blue eyes. "I am a drop bear."

Old habits die hard. "Damien, there's no such thing as drop bears. We've talked about this."

"Don't oppress my rights, mate." He crossed his arms, frowning. Damien Thornbrush was indeed a koala, and a nudist one, making him look like little more than a big grey ball of fur. The only thing he wore was a set of fairly realistic replica fangs, though for someone who actually  _had_  fangs, the difference was obvious. He probably thought the whole "drop bear" thing made him sound more menacing or something. Like anyone would be gullible enough to believe in a predatory koala.

Then again, this was Outback Island. Gullibility was pretty much their claim to fame.

Thornbrush lifted his paw, holding a small cigar, but Nick's nose told him that it wasn't filled with tobacco. "...Is that eucalyptus?"

"Maybe." Thornbrush took a drag from the cigar and puffed. "So what brings you here, Nicky? Business or pleasure?"

He wasn't comfortable with either of those answers. "Uh...business?"

"I see." He laughed to himself, pointing his cigar towards Nick. "You know, I miss having you around here. Remember that time we tried to con Wallabeanie Inc. into giving me my own line of toys?" He still had a slight Outbacker accent, but it was significantly more subdued than his subordinates.

"Yeah. Shame it didn't work out."

" _Lawyers_ ," he spat.

Nick just sat there, trying to figure out how he was supposed to go about this. Foxes were known for being quick thinkers, but he was drawing a blank. "Anyway, I'm actually here looking for a, uh, friend."

"Well you found him!" Thornbrush laughed again.

Nick laughed along for a bit, but he could only manage it for so long. "I mean a different friend actually. Small arctic fox. Way too young and naive for his own good. Answers to the name Jimmy?"

Thornbrush stopped laughing. "Never heard of him."

He tried to maintain eye contact. "R-really? I just thought I'd run that by you, in case maybe you knew anything…"

"Oh, I know plenty." The koala leaned forward in his chair. "In fact, I've been hearing some very interesting things about  _you_ lately…"

"Heh heh, is that so…?"

"I may not care for the Mainland much, but I keep tabs on what goes on there." He sat back again, twirling the cigar around in his claws. "Now, I don't judge you for choosing to wear clothes, Nicky, but I must express concern over your choice of  _color_. Blue doesn't suit you, I'm afraid." Nick jumped as he suddenly flicked the cigar across the room, watching it land on the soft carpet. "Poor choice of friends too. I don't much appreciate a snitch."

"So you  _do_ have him," Nick said. It was hardly a question anyway.

"I do, and I'm not very inclined to give him up. The boy knows too much."

"He knows no more than I do!" Nick blurted out. He slapped both paws over his muzzle, but the damage had been done.

"Is that so?" Thornbrush asked calmly. "That puts me in a rather awkward position then. Boomer?"

Nick suddenly felt two rough paws clasp onto his shoulders from behind the couch. He looked up into the scowling face of the large kangaroo. "Hi, Boomer."

"So tell me, Nicky." Thornbrush's voice went dangerously quiet. "Exactly how much  _do_  you know?"

* * *

_Restricted Area_

_5: 18 PM_

Carla tiptoed as quietly as she could through the empty hallway. It seemed most of the guards were too busy partying to bother doing their jobs, and that worked just fine for the hyena. Stealth was never her strong suit, as multiple academy instructors could attest to.

Her ear pricked as she heard a small whimper coming from another room. Jackpot.

Who needed Wilde, anyway? She certainly didn't! Carla crept up to the door and cracked it open softly. She could at least  _try_ to be stealthy, especially when she had a point to prove.

"Alright then, I didn't wanna get rough with ya, but yer leaving me no choice."

The first person Carla saw was a large, muscular hippo. He was dark grey in color and covered with tattoos, fully visible on his naked body. There was the face of a koala with fangs on his back, a foreign creature she believed to be called a "crocodile" running down his right arm, an-ugh, forget it. She couldn't bear to look at this guy anymore.

"Wanna guess what Uncle Tractor is gonna do if ya keep bein' difficult?"

The hippo blocked her view, but she could just make out the trembling and terrified form of Jimmy Frost tied to a chair in front of him. "Oh no, you're not gonna tickle me are you?!"

Tractor snorted in disbelief. "Wow, kid, you are in for a  _rough_ night." She couldn't see what he was holding, but by the sound it made as he tapped it against his arm, it was large, metallic, and not going to be pleasant for Jimmy.

That was all she needed to know. "Freeze, scumbag!" The hyena kicked down the door and shot 50,000 volts of taser into Tractor's back.

The hippo convulsed violently, then collapsed with a loud thud. Trying not to look at his prone form, Carla ran around to the back of Jimmy's chair and started clawing through the ropes. "Don't worry, I've got you!"

"Carla! Thank you, thank you, thank you!" he cried. "But I think when you shout 'Freeze', you're supposed to wait to see if he-"

"Do you want me to leave you here?!"

"No, sorry!"

Finally getting through the ropes, Carla tugged them off in one motion and let him up. "I can't wait to see the look on Wilde's face when he finds out I rescued you all by myself."

"Oh, did ya now?"

The rookies backed away as Tractor rose back to his feet, shaking off the effects of the taser like it was joy buzzer. He smiled darkly at them, gripping the steel pipe in his fist even tighter. "All this means for me is I get more ta hit."

* * *

_VIP Lounge_

_5: 20 PM_

"W-Well, not much really-" Boomer squeezed Nick's shoulders tighter. "Gack! Okay, I know that you're behind a smuggling ring for a Night Howler derivative called Feral Dream, and that you had Finnick working for you too! That's it!"

"That's it, huh?" Thornbrush didn't look convinced, but he also didn't look sure that he was lying either. That came with being a fox unfortunately. "Fangs, I believe the arctic fox told you the same thing, right?"

The dingo seemed lost in his own little world, but bolted up instantly at his master's call. "Yes, Mr. Thornbrush."

"Thank you." He turned back to Nick. "I'll assume for now that you're telling the truth then. In which case...would you like to know more?"

Nick wasn't sure he heard that right. "Excuse me?"

"About Feral Dream. I'm very proud of it and I would like to share that pride with an old friend." The koala grinned widely, showing his false fangs.

Even Nick had trouble reading him. "Uh…"

But he didn't wait for an answer. "Fangs, bring it here."

The dingo padded up and deposited a small blue pellet into Thornbrush's palm. "Do you see this?" he asked, holding the pellet between his claws. " _This_ is Feral Dream, my greatest accomplishment, my magnum opus!"

"Kinda just looks like a palette swap to me," Nick said before he could stop himself. He knew he couldn't keep control over his mouth for long.

Thankfully, the koala was too full of himself to care. "You just don't understand its brilliance. When Mystic Spring kicked me to the curb, I was in a dark place for a while. A subway, as a matter of fact. As I wandered through those tunnels in desolation, I came upon a great wreckage blocking my path. While trying to find a way around it, I stumbled over a stray little purple pellet." His eyes lit up in excitement. "I thought nothing of it at first, but once that Night Howler case had been closed, I knew that what I held was a golden opportunity! It was a sign!"

"Yeah, a sign that Carrots and I didn't look hard enough," Nick mumbled bitterly. So there  _was_ some evidence left in that train car after all. "And then you made your little smuggling ring? Must have been easy when you've got someone like Boomer here with natural hiding places."

The kangaroo narrowed his eyes. "What are ya implyin'?"

"Just that most mammals probably wouldn't check your pouch and-"

"Can I kill him now?!" Boomer shouted, his claws digging hard into Nick's shoulders.

"No, Boomer," Thornbrush said gently, apparently used to these sudden outbursts. "Anyway, with some of my old contacts-"

"I'm not even wearin' a shirt anymore, the daft bastard! WHAT'S HIS EXCUSE?!"

"Please, Boomer. With some of my old contacts, I set to work at not only replicating the Night Howler formula, but  _improving_ it. Where Bellwether saw only a weapon, I saw potential. So I created Feral Dream, a diluted version of the formula that allows animals to retain their sense of self even as their instincts take over. It wears off after a while, but boy does it give you a rush like no other!"

He laughed with a maniacal glee. "Do you see what I have done?! I've brought naturalism into a whole new era! It's only a matter of time before those ingrates at Mystic Spring start  _begging_ me to be a part of it!"

Nick was almost afraid to ask. "Why...why are you telling me all of this?"

He looked at Nick and smiled. It was not a happy expression. "I'm telling you this so you know what you're getting into. Because I only have two options for you, Nicky. Either join my cause...or die."

Nick backed away in his seat as far as he could manage. "Sorry, but Mom always taught me not to do drugs."  _Seriously, mouth, stop it!_

"So be it." Thornbrush raised a paw and snapped his fingers ominously.

Nick gasped as Boomer's paws clamped around his neck, starting to squeeze tightly. He felt himself being lifted out of his seat, his legs kicking as he tried in vain to pry himself free. Boomer growled into his ear. "I'd say this isn't personal, mate, but  _my_ mom always taught me not to tell lies."

"Wait, wait!" Nick choked out. "There's another way!"

Thornbrush waved to the side and Boomer loosened his grip. Not released, but loosened. "I fail to see how. You already know too much, and that's not even counting the assault and kidnapping charges. Just what am I supposed to do about all that?"

At this point, his mouth couldn't possibly make things any worse, so he might as well talk. "Come on, Damien, I know you can cover all this up. If you were  _that_  easy to catch, you wouldn't be in such a lucrative position in the first place." Play to the ego. Classic manipulation.

"This is true," he admitted. "But as I am speaking to an officer of the ZPD, I have to wonder why you are encouraging me to do so. Should you not be attempting to arrest me yourself?"

"I...I'm sure you're aware that I recently had to arrest Finnick?"

Thornbrush nodded. "That feisty fennec friend of yours? So I've heard. And just so you know, my vans are generally meant to be ridden on the  _inside."_

Nick groaned. He was never going to live that down. "The point is, I already know what it's like having to arrest a friend. It's one of the worst feelings I've ever experienced. So I'll make you a deal: you give back Jimmy and we'll leave you alone."

"And I suppose the ZPD will just go along with that?" Thornbrush asked dryly.

"I didn't say the ZPD, I said  _us._ Technically, our only assignment was to bring in Frisky Dingo over there. But given the circumstances, I doubt the chief's going to be in a big hurry to send us after you again, if he even lets us do more than parking duty for the next few months. Sure, he'll probably send more trouble your way, but that's pretty much unavoidable for you no matter what. All I'm suggesting is that we both just go our separate ways and deal with the fallout on our own."

It occurred to him that Judy was probably not going to like this deal, but he doubted she would complain if it got Jimmy back. And if she did, he might have to casually drop the fact that she was the godmother to Mr. Big's granddaughter and see how long she could keep it up. As much as she didn't want to admit it, the bunny's paws weren't entirely clean either.

Thornbrush at least seemed to be considering it, and that was more than Nick could've hoped for. His expectations were already exceeded.

* * *

_5: 26 PM_

The negotiation was taking a long time. Whether that was a good thing or a bad thing, Judy couldn't tell.

The bunny was seated at one of the numerous small booths surrounding the dance floor, and by extension, the VIP lounge. She could barely even see Nick from here, but she could see him well enough to know that he was alive for the time being. She almost rushed the lounge when she saw the big kangaroo try to strangle him, but it looked like Nick had managed to talk himself out of that for now.

It took her a while to decide if she wanted to stay here or try to find Carla, but she had already made a commitment to Nick's plan and she wasn't going to ruin it just because the hyena didn't approve. Best case scenario: she just had to go vent for a while and they could pick her up after they were done. Worst case scenario: they would have to negotiate for  _two_ hostages.

It wasn't an easy decision though. Her foot hadn't stopped thumping since she sat down and it was starting to give her a cramp.

Judy took a sip from a glass of carrot juice that she had been  _told_ was non-alcoholic, but she was starting to find that assertion more and more questionable. She didn't like the way the serving girl had giggled when she ordered it.

As she continued watching Nick, her eyes naturally wandered around a bit, though not for too long as she preferred not to spend a lot of time looking at the other patrons. In fact, she had subconsciously trained herself to only look at anyone wearing clothes, which was limited to Nick and a few others, including a lone antelope, a pair of drunken bears, a raccoon sitting at another booth, a camel with a video camera, a...a…

Judy's head whipped around and her eyes landed on the raccoon again. Yes, the same raccoon who had nearly given her a concussion just a few short hours ago. As if this night wasn't stressful enough.

She downed the rest of her glass in one gulp and slammed it on the table. No matter what, she stayed put. She wasn't ditching Nick for Carla, and she sure as hell wasn't doing it for  _this_ jackass. So what if this wasn't doing things by the book? The book was out the window by this point. In fact, screw the book! What had the book ever done for her?!

Woah. Where did  _that_ come from?

She looked down at her empty glass. Oh right.

It wasn't like the guy was even doing anything. He was just sitting there, probably having a better night than she was. She could even see a small smile on his face as he looked up towards the ceiling. Well, good for hi-wait, the ceiling? What was so nice about the ceiling?

Following the raccoon's gaze upwards, she did a double-take as a flash of black crossed her field of vision. She rubbed her eyes to clear away any hallucinations, but when she looked again, it was still there. Something small, black, and speedy was crawling along the ceiling. The party-goers below were completely oblivious to this dark shape above them as it shot straight towards the center of the room.

Weird. Just what was going on here?

As she looked back at the smug raccoon, she suddenly had a horrifying realization.

" _Unless whoever killed Mr. Big also took control over his business."_

" _For the last time, I did what you said, alright?!"_

" _This whole thing reeks of a dirty setup."_

" _Shouldn't you be bothering Sang right now? I'm just the backup this time."_

" _What about the Mr. Big case? I noticed there are still some parts of it you didn't discuss, like the theory Officer Trunkaby and I had about…about..."_

Oh sweet cheese and crackers.

"NICK!" She was out of her seat and darting across the floor before she even fully registered what was happening, running as fast as she could towards the fox who was suddenly in terrible danger.

* * *

_VIP Lounge_

_5: 29 PM_

"As you aren't following our dress code, I can't tell for sure…" Thornbrush said slowly, "...but you must have some serious balls to make a request like that."

Nick shifted nervously.

He sighed and waved his paw again, signaling Boomer to put him down. He just dropped him instead. Nick coughed a few times, rubbing his throat. "That said, I like you, Nicky, and it would be a damn shame to have to silence you. We can't be friends anymore, but I would prefer us to not be enemies either." He said nothing more for a few seconds, then suddenly extended a paw towards Nick. "Very well. I accept your compromise."

The fox grinned and reached for his paw, when Thornbrush yanked it away again. "But if I  _ever_ see your traitorous, blue-bellied mug again, I won't be so forgiving." He lowered his paw and allowed Nick to shake it.

"That's fine with me, Damien. I'm just glad this all worked out in the end."

"NICK!"

Boomer had no chance of stopping the frenzied bunny that suddenly leapt into the lounge and onto Nick, wrapping her arms around his torso and giving him a sharp tug. He lost his balance and they both toppled back onto one of the couches.

Thornbrush bristled with anger. "What is the meaning of-?!" His large ears twitched and he looked straight up. The giant disco ball that hung over his head shuddered unnaturally, and he realized too late that its chain had been broken, the object now descending rapidly...right on top of him.

"...Crikey."

With a loud crash and a shower of metal, Damien Thornbrush, crime lord of Outback Island, was no more.

From across the room, Simon smiled and took a sip of his drink. "Two down."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, that was fun. We've been looking forward to this *ahem* "reveal" for a while now. I admit, it was mildly uncomfortable writing this, so we deliberately made it as innocuous as the naturalist scene in the movie. (Minus the "balls" joke, but how could we resist?)
> 
> At this point in the story, there's been enough OCs introduced that we should start giving credit where credit is due to avoid any confusion. Jimmy Frost, Carla Hyenandez, and Boomer the insecure kangaroo belong to me, Berserker88. Simon, Fangs, Tractor, Damien Thornbrush, and this whole crazy idea of a naturalist crime gang belong to Mind Jack. The point is, he's got some good ideas. Go check him out. :)
> 
> A little shoutout to PresidentStalkeyes too for unintentionally giving us the idea of making Thornbrush a "drop bear" impersonator. If you don't know what a drop bear is, look it up. It's hilarious. While you're at it, try looking up some of that random Australian slang we used.


	8. Manic! at the Disco

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who likes action? We do! Who has noticed a distinct lack of action thus far? We have! So to make up for that, we now present a chapter filled with almost nothing but action! Get hyped!
> 
> Aside from that, we would like to welcome a new member to the team, our beta reader UmbraTsuki! They have already proven to be greatly helpful, so here's hoping for even more refined chapters in the future.
> 
> On another note, we've also gotten our first piece of fanart from malachitecat on DeviantArt, depicting an...alternate interpretation of last chapter's ending. Find it at: https://www.deviantart.com/malachitecat/art/Zootopia-Judy-doing-God-Press-on-Nick-sketch-613204651
> 
> Thanks again to both of you, and for everyone still sticking with this thing. :)

****

**Chapter 8: Manic! at the Disco**

_Dream Time_

_VIP Lounge_

_5: 31 PM_

It happened so suddenly that it took a moment for anyone to process. One second, Damien Thornbrush was getting ready to close a deal with Nick. The next, the koala crime lord was crushed beneath the immense weight of his own flashy decoration. Thankfully, the large size of the object had at least limited the spray of blood to the area directly around it, but that didn't do much to calm anyone.

"Mr. Thornbrush!" Fangs and Boomer gasped, reeling back in shock.

Nick screamed, eyes wide at the sight of his former friend. That had almost been  _him_ under there too! "Carrots, you...gotta stop...saving my life like this," he panted. "I'll never catch up at this rate."

On the verge of hysteria, Judy just wrapped herself around his waist, repeatedly shouting "dumb fox!" into his ribcage. Nick tried to comfort her as best he could, with a paw stroking her flattened ears. Even though he had been the one familiar with the victim, he knew that this was a lot harder on her. She had solved murders before, but witnessing one firsthand was an entirely different story.

Tempting as it was, he refrained from making any cracks about bunnies and their emotions.

But despite her inner turmoil, and flattened ears, Judy still had the best hearing of anyone in the lounge, and so she was the only one to pick up the squeaky, panicked voice far above them. "Oh guano, is that Nicholas Wilde?! He wasn't supposed to be here!"

Judy shoved herself away from Nick and glared up at the ceiling through watery eyes. Clinging to the other end of the broken chain was the same dark shape she had glimpsed earlier, now still enough to get a good look at. It was an animal she had never seen before, but its appearance was distinct enough that she could identify it as a bat.

Sensing her watching, the bat's head turned to stare back at her, showing grey fur, green eyes, a pink leaf-shaped nose, big ears (relatively speaking), and a pair of tiny, glistening fangs.

Make that a  _vampire_  bat.

"Oops. Busted." The bat took off instantly, flying across the top of the room.

Tears later, justice now.

Knocking over a very confused Nick, Judy snapped straight into duty mode and ran after it. The fox sat back up, scratching his head. "Okaaaaaay."

" _YOU!"_

Nick had forgotten he wasn't alone in here until he suddenly found himself muzzle-to-muzzle with Boomer. "You set us up!"

The kangaroo made a grab for him, which Nick ducked, rolling off the couch and back to his feet. "Hold up, I didn't have anything to do with this!"

"Oh really?" He backed away as Fangs approached from the other side. "Then I suppose it's just a bloody coincidence that Mr. Thornbrush goes and carks off right when ya happen to show up?"

Nick paused. "...Okay, when you put it  _that_  way, it does sound a little implausible, but-"

He was cut off by Boomer's two large feet to his sternum, sending him flying into the dropped disco ball. As he struggled to get back up, he caught sight of Fangs walking towards him. Expecting another kick to the side, he was surprised when the dingo suddenly stopped, staring down at something on the floor. "Now what's this, then?"

Any relief Nick felt at that moment vanished when he saw Fangs pick up the Feral Dream pellet dropped by Thornbrush. The canid rolled it around in his paw, grinning wickedly. "It's a real beaut, isn't it, Nicky Boy? If yer so interested in Feral Dream, then how about a  _demonstration?_ "

Nick quickly scrambled back up. "Whoa there! Let's not get crazy now."

"I disagree," said Boomer, holding a pellet of his own and glaring at him hatefully. "By all means, let's get crazy."

"Where did you get that?!" Nick was starting to panic now. "I thought you didn't have a pouch!"

Boomer tapped his bowler hat and smirked. "Who needs a pouch?"

Fangs chuckled darkly. "You'll soon find that I'm a real ripper, mate. In more ways than one!"

Nick could only watch in horror as the two naturalists threw the pellets into their mouths and swallowed.

* * *

_Dance Floor_

_5: 33 PM_

Perhaps the most shocking thing about Thornbrush's death was how little impact it seemed to have on anyone else. Either they hadn't noticed the commotion over the blaring disco music, or they were just too lost in the revels to care, but the animals on the dance floor were still just as lively as ever. Just as naked too unfortunately.

"Get back here!" Judy shouted after the fleeing bat.

The winged mammal turned around in mid-air, looking surprised that she was even being pursued. "Well, aren't  _you_ darling?" she asked mockingly. "Do you really think you can catch me from way down there?"

"Don't have to!" Judy pulled out her tranq gun and took a shot. But between the speed, distance, and her accidental intoxication, it didn't even come close to hitting its mark. Instead, the dart veered to the right and stuck into the long neck of a dancing giraffe.

The result was akin to watching a skyscraper collapse. The giraffe fell backward into the crowd of party animals, who moved aside to avoid him, but otherwise didn't react. To be fair, this kind of thing probably happened all the time here. "Sorry!" Judy gasped, putting a paw to her mouth. Then she hiccuped.

The vampire bat stopped in place, descending a bit to hover over Judy. She could see now that the bat wore a black jumpsuit with a zipper in front and holes for her wings. Clearly, someone used to slipping out unnoticed and taking immense pride in that fact. "I take it you must be Officer Judy Hopps."

"And I take it  _you_  must be 'Sang'," she answered back.

"Oh? Simon dropped my name, did he?"

"So the raccoon is Simon?" She glanced over at the booth where she had seen him last. It somehow didn't surprise her that he was already gone.

"Yes, and he's awfully bad at that whole 'backup' thing, isn't he? No point in hiding it then." The bat did a mid-air bow, giving her a wide, fang-filled grin. "Lucy Sang. Professional thief, mercenary, and all-around mischief-maker. Pleasure to screw you over."

Judy stomped a foot furiously. "You think this is a game?! You just killed someone!"

" _Everything_ is a game to me, little girl. In fact, here's another one: Tag, you're it!" Lucy turned around and sped off again.

Judy growled and followed after her. She had yet to meet her match when it came to foot chases, but the current circumstances certainly made things more difficult.

And so did these colorful spots in front of her eyes.

* * *

_Restricted Area_

_5: 21 PM_

"Frost, just back away! Let me handle this!"

Practically shoving the arctic fox to the side, Carla stepped forward and cracked her knuckles as she stared down Tractor. "Get out of our way, puto, before I have to get predatory on your ugly, naked ass!"

Tractor just tapped the steel pipe against his arm and nodded slowly. "Yup. I'm gonna enjoy this."

Carla let out a fierce snarl and charged, slamming a fist into Tractor's gut. The blow seemed to hurt her more than him, judging by the way she whined and shook out her paw. Tractor chuckled. "Now then, are ya ready to give-"

_"Callate!"_

Both he and Jimmy were surprised when Carla's only response was to punch him even more. She let loose a whole flurry of strikes into the hippo, pummeling him relentlessly until he could finally take no more.

Of her annoying him that is. "Alright, I'm about done with this." Almost casually, Tractor lifted the pipe, ready to bring it down on Carla's head.

"Watch out!" Jimmy came in from the side and tackled her out of the way as the pipe banged loudly against the floor.

"What was that for?!" Carla demanded, shoving Jimmy off of her.

"Uh...saving your life?"

"I can handle him just fine by myself!"

Jimmy was too nice to say otherwise. "Maybe we should just run. I mean, the whole point of this was to rescue me right?"

A loud clang came from across the room, where they now saw an overturned shelf blocking the only exit. Tractor turned back to them, holding the pipe over his shoulder. "Yeah? Not gonna happen."

"You were saying?" Carla asked.

"Remind me again why hippos are considered prey," he replied meekly.

* * *

_VIP Lounge_

_5: 34 PM_

No matter how many times Nick witnessed a mammal turn savage, he would never get used to it.

Letting loose a guttural growl, Fangs fell onto all fours, his hackles rising as his joints slowly shifted into a digitigrade stance. The dingo's head rose towards him and Nick saw his eyes turn to slits, his mouth curving upward into a bloodthirsty grin that gave him a good look at his namesake. That was not an instinctual expression. Not only was Fangs still in control, he was enjoying every second of this.

On the opposite side, Boomer hissed loudly and lurched over, tossing his beloved hat to the ground. His kind naturally moved on two legs, but the kangaroo perverted it anyway by remaining in this hunched-over position, glaring up at Nick with slitted eyes that were trying to decide which part of him to tear off first.

Nick couldn't repress a primal fear that shot up his spine at the sight and sounds of the two feral mammals. He could practically feel his own instincts kicking in, demanding that he either answer this clear challenge to his dominance or run like hell.

He chose the latter.

With Boomer blocking the intended exit, Nick whirled around and sprinted for one of the couches, hoping to leap over it. But he forgot how much faster a mammal could be on all fours and only managed to climb onto the cushions before he was tackled by Fangs. Nick fell onto the couch with the dingo on top of him, snapping his large jaws at this throat. One of Nick's arms was pinned down and he used the other to try to push him away. "Yikes, you need a breath mint  _bad_ , buddy."

He also forgot that Fangs could still understand him, and his snapping got even more ferocious in response. In his fury, Nick managed to get his other arm free and reached behind him. With Fangs getting uncomfortably close to his jugular vein, Nick's paw found a pillow, and he shoved the large cushion into the dingo's mouth. Confused by the foreign object, Fangs lost his focus just long enough for Nick to kick him off.

The fox tried to scramble over the couch, only for Boomer to grab him from behind and throw him back into the disco ball again. Nick rose back up, staring down the feral kangaroo. Good thing he'd been trained for this situation.

Boomer titled his head in primal curiously, watching as Nick started hopping from one foot to the other, his fists held to his face and throwing air punches in his direction. "Ladies and gentlemammals, it's time for the title bout here on scenic Outback Island! In the red corner, weighing in at 80 lbs, hailing from the Rainforest District, is the lovable rogue you know as the Champ! In the blue corner, weighing...wait, how much do you weigh?"

This routine worked on the guys back at the academy, but not here. Boomer's fist slammed into his jaw, rocking his head back. Nick put a paw to his chin, feeling a slight wetness. "And he takes a sucker punch, but the Champ is not giving up! Float like a butterfly, sting like a b-ITCH!" Boomer threw another punch into his muzzle, then kicked him into the disco ball. Nick hit the ball and staggered forward, where Boomer kicked him back into it, again, and again, and again. He ended this assault by grabbing the fox and landing a vicious headbutt.

Nick collapsed to the ground once more, keenly aware of several bruised ribs and the prominent taste of copper. He looked up to see Boomer glaring down at him. "H-Hey...that's a TKO. You win!"

Boomer slammed a foot onto his chest, pinning him down. Hearing a low growling noise, Nick turned his head and saw Fangs, having just finished tearing the literal stuffing out of the pillow. Several pieces still clung to his mouth, making him look even  _more_ demented. The dingo advanced slowly and licked his lips, ready to take another crack at that jugular.

But this time both of his arms were free. Nick reached down into his pocket and drew his taser, firing both electrodes into Boomer. The kangaroo let out a feral scream and stumbled off of him. Nick kicked his legs out from under him, sending him toppling backward, directly on top of Fangs. The dingo could only let out a short whimper before the large marsupial landed on him.

"And there goes the bell!" Nick smirked, looking down at the taser in his paw. "...Probably should've opened with that."

Seeing his chance, Nick dashed past the tangled mass of fur and claws and straight for the exit, onto the dance floor.

He stopped.

The dance floor filled with dozens of stupid, but innocent civilians.

And he was about to lead two feral mammals right into them.

Nick clenched his fists. No. Nobody else was going to get hurt today because of him.

He turned around slowly, seeing Fangs and Boomer getting back up, looking more determined than ever to rip him apart. Nick calmy extended his arm and motioned his paw in the universal sign of, "Bring it."

This was going to  _suck._

* * *

_Dance Floor_

_5: 37 PM_

"Stop in the name of the claw! I mean law!" It quickly occurred to Judy that having to maneuver through the legs of various naked animals was not the most desirable course of action. Among other reasons, it slowed her down far too much for her liking. Instead, the bunny hopped onto the head of a wombat, climbed up the back of a zebra, and continued her pursuit, jumping from head to head as she kept her eyes on the fleeing bat.

"Are you really still trying to catch me?" Lucy dodged away from a frenzied grab, watching Judy tumble clumsily into a lion's mane. Disentangling herself from the flustered feline, Judy pounced for her again, only to smack square into an elephant trunk instead. Lucy laughed and shook her head, her tone somewhere between amused and pitying. "My, such a determined little bun you are. It's actually kind of cute."

"Don't call me cute, you flying skank!" Springing off the trunk, Judy showed her exactly what she thought of the "c-word" by sending both feet into her smug little face.

Lucy went flying back, spinning through the air before falling back down onto the face of a rhino. The bat slid down his snout until she was stopped by his horn. She groaned in pain, rubbing her head with a tiny hand. "Thanks for the help, Simon."

"Hey, Nick, didja see that?!" Standing atop a bull's head and gripping both horns like she was on an amusement park ride, Judy looked around excitedly. "Awww, you weren't even looking!" she pouted.

"Wow, you couldn't  _pay_ me to drink your blood right now."

At the sound of her voice, Judy instantly snapped back to attention, glaring at her fiercely. "Fries!"

"...What?"

Using the bull's horns like a makeshift slingshot, Judy flung herself across the room, right on top of Lucy. She squeaked in alarm as she grappled with the bunny on the rhino's head.

The party-goers had shown incredible tolerance (or obliviousness) to their battle so far, but this was where they drew the line. "Okay, little dudes, you're partying  _way_  too hard. Like, get off my face, bros!" The rhino threw his head back, tossing both Judy and Lucy off of him.

"WEEEEEEE!" Judy shouted giddily.

Still grappling with each other, the two small mammals were thrown through the air and onto a donkey. "Whoa! Personal space! Don't be an ass!" They rolled down his back and were kicked away by his strong hind legs.

With Judy grabbing Lucy by the head and Lucy putting a death grip on Judy's ear, they both realized they were flying straight towards the back of a porcupine. They let out a simultaneous scream before Judy kicked out her legs, ricocheting them off of a bear's belly and onto the floor.

"You are really starting to tick me off!" Lucy hissed.

"Good!" Judy yelled back, pinning the bat down with her arms.

"W-Watch out!"

Judy looked up reflexively, and her eyes widened as an elephant's foot came falling towards them. Grabbing onto Lucy, she rolled them both out of the way, only to be kicked across the floor by a tiger's foot instead. "I am not a soccer ball!" the bat yelled, finally slipping out from under Judy's grasp.

As Judy got back up and brushed herself off, she became aware of another bunny sidling up next to her, one that was brown-furred and naked. "Hey there, carrot cake. Wanna join the fun? I bet you look  _mighty_  fine under those clothes." He winked at her.

Lucy just managed to get herself off the ground again when she had to swoop out of the way of a furry brown projectile. "Did...did you just throw another bunny at me?!"

Judy stepped towards her, looking increasingly unhinged. "I am buzzed out of my mind in the middle of a naturalist club! I have got nooooooo inhibitions right now, sister!"

Lucy hesitated for a moment, contemplating something. She shook her head. "Nope, I'm not getting paid enough for this." The bat flapped her wings and ascended out of the crowd, making a break for it.

"No, but you're  _gonna_ pay!" Judy bounced herself off a few more mammals and soared into the air, letting out a battle cry as she tackled Lucy from behind.

* * *

_Restricted Area_

_5: 25_

Carla backed away as Tractor swung his pipe at her repeatedly. She attempted a few more punches on him in the interim, but they proved just as ineffective as ever. Possibly even  _less_ effective given how sore her paws were by now.

"Here, have a seat!" Tractor paused as the chair Jimmy had been tied to was suddenly broken over the back of his head, its pieces scattering across the room. The arctic fox, who had clearly spent too much time with Nick already, grinned sheepishly as the thug turned around to face him, completely unscathed.

_Okay, this is looking pretty bad. What would Nick do?_

"Um...I know what you're thinking, but you totally shouldn't beat me up with that big scary pipe."

Tractor paused. "This should be interesting. Okay, I'll bite. Why shouldn't I beat ya up with this big scary pipe?" He was vaguely aware of Carla leaping onto his back and attempting to claw/bite him, which worked about as well as an ant trying to chip away a brick wall. He flung his head back slightly and knocked her off.

Jimmy tapped his claws together nervously. "Er, well, it's not like there's much of a point to it now. I mean, you're not gonna get any information from me now that I'm freed. You're more likely to just kill me at this rate."

"Correct." He thumped the pipe into his open palm again. "And?"

"A-And that would be...wrong?"

"Wrong?"

"Right?"

He grinned. "Wrong."

Jimmy closed his eyes as Tractor pulled back to swing the pipe. Before he could, however, he felt a tap on his leg. "Excuse me por favor, I believe you may have forgotten someone."

"Didn't forget. Just don't care."

"You  _should_ care!"

Wielding one of the wooden legs from the broken chair, Carla swung upwards...directly into Tractor's crotch.

Jimmy couldn't help but wince, especially as Carla had swung the weapon so hard she'd actually managed to break it again. Judging by the look on Tractor's face, it wasn't the only thing she'd broken.

The hippo had been able to stand up to a lot, but even he had his limits. With a wordless groan that came out as more of a whine, Tractor fell to the ground.

Not quite satisfied with this outcome, Carla proceeded to beat him with what was left of the makeshift club several more times, screaming words in a language he didn't recognize, but still knew were not fit for children to hear. Once Tractor was reduced to a whimpering mess, she dropped the weapon and spit on his face for good measure. "Adios, puto!"

She turned around to face Jimmy, who flinched away slightly. "Well? Are we ready to leave yet?"

"...I'd say so, yes."  _Note to self: do_  not _piss off Hyenandez._

After a minute, the two rookies pulled the shelf away from the door, only to find their exit locked. "What?! How did  _that_ happen?!" Carla shouted, trying to force open the door. All she managed to do was rip off the handle.

On the other side, a pair of wombats with bumps on their heads smirked and gave each other a high-four.

* * *

_Dance Floor_

_5: 41 PM_

The two tangled mammals careened past the crowd of dancers, over to the refreshment table, and crashed directly inside of a large punch bowl. Soaked in this sticky liquid, bunny and bat continued to wrestle with each other while shouting obscenities, quickly attracting gawkers.

"Check it out, girl fight!"

"My money's on the rabbit!"

"Hold on, I am  _so_ putting this on ZooTube!"

"...Where were you keeping that phone?"

Oblivious to all of this, Judy kicked Lucy into the rim of the bowl. "You want red liquid so much? Help yourself!" She made a lunge for her, but Lucy flapped out of the way and came down on Judy's head, shoving her face into the punch.

The bat quickly scurried out, trying to dry her wings. With Judy in hot pursuit, she quickly tipped over a wine cooler, spilling ice and cold drinks all over the table. The bunny struggled to run through it. "Eek! Cold, cold, cold, cold!" Lucy didn't help matters by chucking wine bottles at her, forcing Judy to pivot herself every which way to dodge.

"What's wrong, darling? Getting cold feet?"

Lucy readied another wine bottle, but stopped when Judy suddenly doubled over, laughing hysterically. "Hahahahaha, I GET IT! Hahahahaha, BECAUSE MY FEET ARE ACTUALLY COLD! HeheheheheheheHAHAHAHA!"

Deciding that she clearly didn't need any  _more_ alcohol, Lucy nailed her in the face with a double-layered cake instead.

The shock snapped Judy out of her drunken stupor, and as she groaned and wiped cake off of herself, she realized that Lucy was surrounded by nothing by food and decorations. Rubbing chocolate from her eyes, Judy whipped out her tranq gun and fired two more shots. Lucy dove behind the cake tray to shield herself from both. "Ha!  _Still_ a lousy shot!"

The bat poked her head out, only to see Judy no longer in sight. Panicked, she looked behind her, but still no sign of the bunny.

She really should've known to look up.

When she finally caught sight of the rabbit, it was just long enough to see her descend on the opposite end of the table and land full-force. That side instantly buckled under her leg strength and collapsed. Like a seesaw, the same force then carried to the other side and launched it straight up, Lucy Sang along with it. With a shrill scream, the vampire bat smacked into the ceiling and fell all the way back down towards the floor. Positioning herself below the falling bat, Judy threw herself on her back and kicked upwards, catching Lucy and knocking her back into the air. She kept kicking her like this, juggling Lucy in the air a few times, before finally landing a final double-kick that tossed her to the ground.

"Urrrgh...oh, Siiiiiiimon, bunny cop is using me as a hacky-sack, WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?!"

Seeing things suddenly get darker, Lucy looked up to find Judy standing over her, the overturned punch bowl in her arms. Before she could protest, the bowl was slammed over her like a makeshift prison, with Judy perched on top.

"No more bats in  _my_ belfry!"

* * *

_VIP Lounge_

_5: 39_

Nick didn't even get the chance to use that taser again.

Without warning, Fangs lunged for his arm, sinking his teeth into Nick's wrist. The fox yelped, dropping the weapon and watching it fall right between the couch cushions. Typical.

He kicked Fangs off of his arm, but was almost immediately assaulted by Boomer, who slashed him across the chest, sharp claws raking through his shirt and leaving three red gashes. Before Nick could so much as gasp in pain, Boomer followed up with a kick that knocked him on his back. As he rolled over and tried to lift himself up on his paws, he coughed up blood onto the carpet. "That can't be good."

Fangs suddenly bit into Nick's tail, making him scream and fall back down. As a predator, he knew his sounds of anguish would only encourage the dingo, who continued chewing into his tail even more viciously. At this rate, he would tear the thing right off. In desperation, Nick used his own claws to slash Fangs in the cheek. The canid's snarl told him that was a very bad idea.

Nick tried to roll away as Fangs pounced on him, just avoiding losing his throat as the movement redirected the fierce jaws into his left shoulder instead. Nick screamed again, made even worse when Boomer kicked him hard in the side. That time he was  _sure_ he lost a rib or two.

"Look, guys, can we reach some kind of-auggh-compromise here?! We don't have to-ack-do this! Just...stop...please…"

As the two feral mammals tore into him, it suddenly occurred to Nick that maybe he  _couldn't_ talk himself out of anything. Maybe he  _wasn't_ clever enough to escape from any danger. At this moment in time, he was neither the cunning conmammal nor the reformed cop. He was just a simple fox battling for dominance against two fierce adversaries. And losing.

His vision started to blur, the pain becoming lost over a growing sense of numbness. The realization felt a bit surreal.  _Wow...I am actually going to die here._

His life didn't flash before his eyes or anything cheesy like that. Instead, he found himself wondering who would show up to his funeral. Judy certainly would, along with most of Precinct 1, by obligation if nothing else. He knew Judy would take it the hardest, Jimmy and Carla might share some words on how briefly they had known him, Chief Bogo would  _try_  to make a heartfelt eulogy; it wasn't his fault he just wasn't good at being delicate. Aside from that, he didn't expect anyone outside of a few underworld contacts, not including Finnick, and maybe some normal civilians who he probably helped out without even bothering to learn their names. If he was lucky, some of Judy's family might even show up, and maybe even...

_I'm sorry, Mom. I hope I finally made you proud of me again...at least for a little while..._

*BANG*

Nick snapped back to consciousness at the sound of a gunshot. With a sharp cry, Fangs was blown off of Nick, tumbling across the ground before coming to a stop, motionless. Boomer seemed to have as much trouble registering this as he was, holding his head and hissing anxiously, as if trying to quickly fight off the effects of Feral Dream and come back to his senses. He was too late, and with another shot, the kangaroo was downed as well.

Nick stared up weakly at the one who had rescued him. "Y-You…?"

The one-legged raccoon glared back, simply shoving the silver revolver back into his aviator jacket and walking away. "Hey! Wait! Why did you...you…"

That was all he could manage before he passed out.

* * *

_5: 44 PM_

When it came to nightclubs, there were a lot of noises that tended to be ignored. Loud crashes, broken glass, and collapsing mammals were all par for the course.

But gunshots? Gunshots were  _noticed._

The moment the shots went off, Dream Time was no longer a nightclub. As the resident mammals started to panic and run for their lives, it instead turned into a veritable stampede, that mentality helped along by lingering Feral Dream influence.

"H-Hey, watch it!" Judy struggled to stay on top of the punch bowl as a wombat sped past her, quickly followed by several much larger mammals. "No, no, no, no, NO!" The charging rhino proved too much for her, and Judy was thrown from her perch.

"Yes, yes, yes, yes, YES!" Lucy Sang immediately slid out from under the bowl and took to the air, staying well above the stampeding horde. She smiled down at Judy as she watched her try to avoid being trampled. "Farewell, bunny cop. The Count sends his regards."

" _What_  Count?!"

"That's for  _me_ to know, and  _you_ to mindlessly obsess over. Ta ta!"

Lucy gave a mocking wave and disappeared into the crowd. Judy tried to give chase, but every time she took one step forward, she had to dodge a few steps back. By the time the room cleared out a few moments later, the bat was gone.

"Great." That was 2-1 today against catching suspects. Not that she was keeping score or anything. Might as well meet back up with Nick and try to find the rookies. They probably weren't in much danger anymore with Thornbrush and his goons out of the way.

Judy's eyes trailed over to the VIP lounge and her heart sank. It wasn't the rookies she should've been worried about. "NICK!"

Nothing sobered up a bunny faster than seeing her closest friend lying motionless in a pool of blood. How could this have happened?  _You never should have left his side you dumb bunny!_

Judy sprinted across the room to get to Nick.

She never made it.

"FREEZE! ZPD!"

Judy had thought she was hysterical before, when she'd pulled Nick away from that disco ball, but even then she had still heard the voice of Lucy Sang. This time, she had completely failed to notice the sound of approaching police sirens until a whole squad of officers burst into the room. She could tell just by looking at them that this was not the ZPD she knew. This was the local police force: Precinct 5.

The one Chief Bogo had warned her about.

Her eyes shot back to Nick. "Wait! You need to help-!"

Unfortunately, her frantic shouting, combined with being covered in cake and fruit punch,  _may_  have given the cops the wrong idea, and the next thing she registered was a tranq dart hitting her square in the chest.

"Nick…" She took a few steps towards the fox, then collapsed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp, that got dark fast. Can you believe this was originally meant to be combined with the last chapter? What were we thinking? XD
> 
> So how about that action? Good god, it was fun writing these scenes! Especially the one with Judy and Lucy, where we pretty much just went apeshit with everything in the setting and got an excuse to make Judy as OOC as possible in the process. More people need to write Drunk Judy. I know the fight involving the rookies was a bit underwhelming, but there's only so much you can do with that kind of situation. And of course, Acoustic License is in full effect for all of this.
> 
> Lucy Sang belongs to Mind Jack. (For those who don't get the pun, "Sang" is short for "Sanguis", the Latin word for blood.)
> 
> A belated tribute to Muhammad Ali. I'm not much of a boxing fan, but I know a legend when I see one. R.I.P.


	9. Back out of Outback

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone sick of the Australian stuff yet? If so, we have some good news. This is the last chapter of it.

****

**Chapter 9: Back out of Outback**

_Outback Island_

_6: 21 PM_

"Are you lucid, Officer Hopps?"

Judy squinted at the bright light of the interrogation room. She wasn't sure if that was a result of her prey-based eyesight or the alcohol still in her system, but as her eyes adjusted, they took in a pair of small mammals standing on the table in front of her.

They were two local marsupials, a bilby and a numbat. The bilby wore a pair of spectacles, his hands clasped in front of him in a show of caring. The numbat wore shades, with a toothpick sticking out of his maw, and looked more like he'd rather jab it into her eye socket. Both were dressed in ZPD uniforms, though their badges were of a slightly different design than she was used to.

Seeing that they had her attention, the bilby cleared his throat and stepped forward. "Good to see you okay. I am Officer Baggins, and this my partner, Officer Barnum. We would like to ask you a few questions about what occurred at Dream Time."

"And you better talk or you're doing hard time, long-ears!" Barnum shouted.

Judy raised an eyebrow. Were they seriously expecting her to fall for the old "good cop/bad cop" routine? She had literally read entire textbooks about this.

"First of all, we have to ask why you appear to be covered in dessert," Baggins asked gently.

On cue, a piece of cake dropped from her ear and onto the floor. That would certainly explain why they weren't taking her seriously. How would Nick respond to this?

" _Because I_ am  _covered in dessert."_

" _The dinner was too bland."_

" _I'm not sure. When was the last time you got your eyes checked?"_

" _You should see the other guy."_

And then Judy remembered how much she missed Nick, and how worried she was about him. The image of her partner lying on the floor flashed through her mind, making her shiver. Why did that dumb fox have to invade her thoughts at a time like this? She had to get out of here so she could find out if he was okay.

But she was not Nick. She was Officer Judith Laverne Hopps, and she was a professional. "Because I was starting to get a bit batty."

She wanted to slam her head against the table. Evidently, alcohol and tranquilizer didn't mix.

"I see we've got a smartass over here!" Barnum growled, storming across the length of the table to reach her. The numbat grabbed Judy by both ears and pulled her up to his face. "Now you listen here, Cottontail! You better answer us or we're going to put a real stain on that pretty little record of yours!"

 _Please. Chief Bogo is scarier than you when he's in a_ good _mood._

Which she thankfully did  _not_ say. "What I meant is that I got like...this...as the result of my attempt to chase down the murderer of Damien Thornbrush."

Barnum squeezed her ears, hard. "A likely story! So who's this 'murderer' then?"

"The bat!" Judy screamed, a lot louder than intended.

"I see." Baggins scribbled something onto a small notepad. "And did anyone else see this bat, Officer Hopps?"

"Some of the mammals at the party did."

"Ah yes, the  _naturalists_." His tone of voice made it clear exactly how much validity he put into these particular witnesses. To be fair, it was a bit hard to blame him. "Anyone else? Perhaps when the incident occurred?"

"No, none of them noticed it."

"Then how are you so sure it was even there?!" Barnum pressed, mangling her ears further.

"Because I heard her voice! When we were in the lounge!"

Baggins nodded in understanding. "Do you  _often_ hear voices that no one else does?"

"Of course." It came with being a bunny.

"And what do these voices say to you?"

"All sorts of things," Judy answered innocently. "But this one spurred me into action, telling me to run!"

"Run from where?"

Why were they having such trouble understanding this? She thought she was explaining it pretty well. "From the scene of the crime, to chase after the bat!"

The two marsupials shared a look.

"Good, good, I think we have all we need," Baggins said, putting the notepad away. "Thank you for your time, Officer Hopps." He and Barnum turned and hopped off of the table.

Judy sat up in her seat and smiled confidently.

_Wow, and I really thought that was going to go badly for a second._

* * *

_Savannah Central_

_Saint Bernarde's Hospital_

_7: 42 PM_

"Well...that sure sucked alright."

When Nick woke up again, he was no longer lying on the carpeted floor of the Dream Time VIP lounge. Now he was greeted by thin sheets, bright lights, and the sharp smell of cleaning chemicals.

A hospital. He hated hospitals.

He felt sore in several places, a stinging pain from the numerous claws and teeth that had cut into him. His tail twitched reflexively, instantly causing another spurt of pain from where Fangs just  _had_ to chomp on it. That was going to get annoying fast. To top it all off, he had a piercing headache, impairing his ability to fully process any of this.

Of course, the fact that he had woken up again  _at all_ made it a little hard to complain. That didn't mean he wouldn't be whining about cheap hospital food in the near future.

But as soon as his thoughts drifted away from his current predicament, they immediately went to Judy. Last he'd seen of her, she had gone chasing after...something. He was still a little lost on that. What happened to her then? And what about Frost and Hyenandez? Were they all okay? He suddenly had the horrible thought that with Thornbrush's boys thinking he had betrayed them, they were likely to take their anger out on the arctic fox and anyone who tried to help him.

He couldn't just stay here and let those thoughts fester any longer. His imagination was notoriously creative. So Nick quickly sat up and tried to get out of the cot, against his better judgment and the protests of the nearby medical equipment.

"Hey! You get back down, Wilde!"

To his surprise, it wasn't a nurse who stopped him, but the familiar face of Officer Delgato. Next to him was Officer Fangmeyer, both standing at the door. The white wolf gave a small wave of his paw. "How's it going, Nick?"

He gestured to his hospital gown. "Could be better."

"Yeah, I bet." The two officers came over to Nick's bedside, both to comfort him and keep him from trying to get up again.

As soon as they did though, Nick's nose twitched and he turned away. "Why do you guys stink?" It was a vaguely familiar stink too, but he couldn't quite place it.

Delgato and Fangmeyer shared a silent curse, clearly hoping he wouldn't notice over the hospital smell. "Police work is a dirty job sometimes," Delgato said, eyes on his feet.

"That literally did not answer my question at all."

"Nevermind that!" Fangmeyer insisted. "Don't you want to know what happened to the others?"

If he didn't want to know so  _badly_ , Nick would've pounced on that obvious attempt to change the subject. He sighed, letting himself fall for it. "Okay, I'll bite. What happened?"

"Precinct 5 happened," Delgato said bitterly. "I don't know what went down in that nightclub, but boy are they pissed about it. A few suspects got dragged in for questioning, including Hopps and the rookies. If you didn't get mauled half to death and shipped back to the mainland, you'd probably be there too."

"I'd say more like three quarters to death, but alright. At least they're okay."

"For now. Problem is, they're not planning to let them go anytime soon."

"What?!" Nick shot out of bed again and had to be pushed back down by the tiger. "Why not?! They didn't even do anything!"

"Not according to them," said Fangmeyer. "Precinct 5 seems to be under the impression that they murdered a high-profile crime lord."

"That's ridiculous! They can't possibly have any evidence for that!" Two of them weren't even anywhere near the incident for crying out loud!

Delgato shrugged. "If they do, they're not telling us. The chief's trying to negotiate their release, but it's not going so well. Apparently, you guys did all of this without their permission?"

Nick's response died in his throat.  _Got us there._

"Don't worry, I'm sure they'll be fine," Fangmeyer tried to reassure him. "If that nightclub fiasco was as crazy as the reports are making it sound, I'm sure they can handle a little police questioning."

* * *

_Zootopia Police Department - Precinct 5_

_Interrogation Room_

_6:35 PM_

Jimmy Frost's tail flickered nervously back and forth. If nothing else, he could certainly say his first day on the job had been informative. Now, he got to learn about police interrogation procedures, albeit from the wrong end. But hey, that could be valuable experience too!

"According to what you told the officers on the scene, you had been kidnapped by mammals working for Damien Thornbrush, correct?" asked Officer Baggins.

"You better not be lyin'!" Barnum added.

"That's right!" Jimmy answered cheerfully.

"You...seem rather happy about that," Baggins noted.

"I mean, it was a pretty bad situation, but also exciting."

"You better wipe that smile off your face before I smack it off!" Barnum threatened.

"Oh, s-sorry." The fox's face fell.

"What happened after you were taken?" Baggins continued.

Jimmy snapped right back to cheerful. "Well, first they threw me into this big van, and drove me alllllll the way down to that disco club. Except I was all tied up at the time, so I couldn't really do much."

"And you were...excited...by this?" Baggins asked cautiously.

"Oh yeah! That was some serious adrenaline!"

"Weren't you afraid?"

"I was terrified! But man, what a thrill!" His tail started wagging.

"You are one screwed up little fox," Barnum remarked.

Baggins frowned, scribbling on a small notepad. "And then they brought you inside. What next?"

"They took me to this backroom and tied me to a chair. Then this big hippo guy came in and started threatening me."

"Describe this 'big hippo guy'."

"Well he was...big...and a hippo...oh, and he also had all of these cool tattoos!"

"What about him being naked?!" Barnum asked. "Did that not register to you or something?!"

Jimmy put a finger to his lip in thought. "Oh...I guess he was, huh? Sorry, I wasn't really paying attention to that. I was a little too into the moment."

"Yeah, that's become quite apparent," Barnum grunted.

He grinned widely. "It was just such an adventure, you know? I never thought my first day on the job would be so incredible!"

"Okay, I think we're done here," Baggins concluded.

* * *

_Savannah Central_

_Saint Bernarde's Hospital_

_7: 57 PM_

"Nick, seriously, you need to calm down," Delgato advised. "You're getting restless leg syndrome."

By which he meant that Nick's leg was repeatedly kicking at his sheets, almost knocking them off several times. "Look, I can't help being worried okay? I barely understand  _this_ precinct, let alone these Outbacker guys. Who knows what they're doing to them?"

Fangmeyer lifted his phone, looking over a new text. "Good news is that City Hall is getting involved now. I don't see this dispute going on for much longer."

"Because I have sooooooo much faith in City Hall."

"Hey, don't be like that. I know you and the new mayor have had a...mixed history, but-"

"He tried to kill me!"

"That wasn't his fault!" Delgato argued. "Besides, Lionheart probably wouldn't have even bothered. Be grateful for whatever help you can get."

Nick huffed and crossed his arms, like a cub who couldn't have his favorite toy. Speaking of which, "Do you guys know what they did with my stuff?"

"I think they store patient belongings up front," Fangmeyer answered.

"Then can you go get something for me?" He gestured for the wolf to come closer and whispered in his ear.

"Huh. Not what I was expecting, but okay. I'll be right back."

Fangmeyer left the room, leaving a confused Delgato behind. Nick elected to distract him before he could ask about that. "So how badly am I injured anyway?"

Delgato gave a sharp whistle. Not a good sign. "According to your medical reports, you've got several lacerations across your torso, a wounded shoulder, broken tail, bruised ribs, a minor concussion, and apparently you bit your tongue somewhere along the line."

Sure didn't stop him from talking though. "So they didn't break my ribs? That's a relief." Good thing he was so prone to exaggerating, even to himself.

"Yeah, but you're still going to be out of commision for about a week. Sorry, Nick."

He put on his best casual smile and leaned back, arms folded behind his head. "No worries, I'll be fine."

_Holy vulpine, I am going to kill someone if I can't do something soon!_

* * *

_Zootopia Police Department - Precinct 5_

_Interrogation Room_

_6: 43 PM_

"What happened when you went to rescue Officer Frost?"

Carla Hyenandez leaned back in her chair, putting her feet against the table. She couldn't believe these guys were wasting her time with this crap. And what was this about a dead crime lord? She knew Wilde would screw up the negotiation, but not  _this_ badly!

"What do you think? I shot the hippo with my taser and went to untie Frost. But then he stands up again and...it's huge!"

"The hippo?"

"Not just the hippo, but what he was packing!"

Baggins gulped. "And...what would that be?"

Carla spread her cuffed paws, trying to express size as best she could. "His rod! His big, steel rod! He pulled it out and started beating it against his arm!"

"Whoa! We don't need to hear about his rod!" Barnum yelled.

"Of course you do! He tried to pound me with it!"

"I-I-I beg your pardon?!" Baggins stammered, eyes wide.

"But don't worry, he missed and just banged it into the floor instead."

"I...didn't know that was possible."

How stupid  _were_  these guys? She was just trying to describe the incident like they asked! "So he picks his pole up again, though it's a little dented at this point." Both officers cringed. "And he just keeps swinging it at me like he doesn't have any sense of decency. Then Jimmy grabs his wood and nails him from behind, and the guy barely even flinches! He must have had one stiff head!"

"Why are you telling us this?!" Barnum screamed, paws over his ears.

"I'm telling you because you need to know!" Carla insisted. "I rejected Frost's help at first, but now I see the kind of comradery two partners can share in their time of need! It looks to me like you two could learn something from our experience!"

"What the hell are you implying?!" Barnum snarled murderously.

"Eesh, someone's getting defensive. I guess you're a pretty inadequate partner, huh?"

"I'LL KILL YOU!" Barnum almost lunged for her throat, but was restrained by Baggins.

"I-Is that all, Officer Hyenandez?" asked Baggins, practically begging her to say yes.

"Pretty much," she shrugged. "Oh, except for the part where I hit him in the cojones."

* * *

_Detention Center_

_6: 48 PM_

The cell door slammed on Carla as she was shoved in with her teammates. "What did I do?!"

"Hey, Carla." Jimmy waved as energetically as he could, which wasn't very.

"What are you in for?" Judy asked flatly.

"I have no idea!" Carla yelled. "This whole precinct is completely loco!"

"You're one to talk, missy."

The three officers now found someone else standing outside of their cell. He was a black-furred tasmanian devil with steely eyes, dressed in an especially decorated uniform with four stars on his collar. "I take it you're the head honcho?" asked Carla.

"You will refer to me as Chief Devlin Bushfire," he growled, looking over the group. "So this is the famous Precinct 1, eh? Not nearly as impressive in person."

"We have  _names_ you know," said Judy, foot thumping.

"Oh, I'm well aware. You're Officers Hopps, Frost, and Hyenandez." He pulled out a small notebook they recognized as the one belonging to Baggins. "Or should I say 'schizophrenic', 'masochist', and 'pervert'?"

Carla's eyes widened. "Who are you calling a masochist?!"

"You have no right to lock us up like this!" Judy protested. "Chief Bogo isn't going to stand for it!"

"Chief Bogo has no authority here, missy!" Bushfire shot back, paws clenched around the bars. "You have any idea what I've had to put up with tonight? Naturalists running wild on the streets, one of the biggest names in the region being snuffed out, and it all ties back to you three. I'm sick and tired of you Mainlanders thinking you can come onto  _our_  island and do whatever you please! It's about time someone put you in your place!"

Bushfire backed away, but his glare remained just as fierce. "You lot better get used to that cell, because you're not getting out of there for a long,  _long_  time."

Ignoring the further protests of the three cops, the chief turned on his heel and stormed out.

* * *

_Chief Bushfire's Office_

_7: 12 PM_

"Then maybe you shouldn't have sent them in the first place!" The tasmanian devil slammed down the phone without waiting for a response.

This was getting more and more infuriating by the minute. If dealing with these renegade cops wasn't enough of a hassle, now he had both Precinct 1  _and_ City Hall crawling up his tail too! Couldn't these guys take a hint?!

He knew that his precinct had never gained the same kind of prominence as the others, especially Precinct 1, but that didn't make them any less important. Out here on the isolated district of Outback Island, they were the only form of protection the local mammals could rely on. That was a hard enough job, underfunded as they were, without the Mainlanders trying to do it for them.

He could well lose his badge over this, but he didn't care. He would hold onto these officers as long as he needed to. He had a point to make, and no mammal was more dangerous than one with a point! He would  _never_ give in to these petty demands,  _never_ show weakness,  _never-_

His phone rang.

A scowl crossed Devlin Bushfire's muzzle. Chief Bogo again? The mayor? Whoever it was, they were going to regret catching him in a bad mood.

He picked up the phone.

* * *

_Savannah Central_

_Saint Bernarde's Hospital_

_8: 16 PM_

"That is  _it!"_

Delgato and Fangmeyer nearly jumped out of their uniforms when Nick suddenly screamed and tried to bolt for the door. It took the combined might of both officers to wrestle him back into the cot. "Wilde, do not make us tranq you! Or worse, get one of the nurses to do it!" Delgato threatened.

"You can't leave, man! If the exertion doesn't kill you, Bogo will!"

"Then get me a phone!" Nick yelled, still struggling. "Put me in touch with whatever joker is in charge of those guys and let me set him straight!"

"Unless you're trying to get them all executed, I don't think so!"

"NICK!"

Everyone froze. Had they heard that right?

They quickly found out when a small, grey blur crashed straight through the two other officers and wrapped itself around Nick. "Ack! Not the ribs! Why does everyone go for the ribs?!"

Judy let up, but didn't apologize. "I'm so glad you're okay!"

"Me too."

She smiled. "Aww, it's sweet that you were worried about me."

"No, I mean that I'm glad I'm okay too."

Judy had to fight down the urge to immediately sock him in the ribs.

"Not to interrupt the happy reunion, but... _how?"_  Fangmeyer asked, gaping. "Last we heard, there was still no progress on getting you released."

"I wanted to leave it as a surprise," Judy said, giving a cheeky grin.

"What happened to the rookies?" asked Delgato. "You didn't have to leave them behind, did you?"

A loud wheeze of exhaustion answered him. "No...we're just...not as fast…" said Jimmy Frost, leaning against the door frame. Nick averted his eyes. This was the first time he had seen the arctic fox since...the incident.

A slightly less tired Carla trailed in behind him. "Glad to see...you're doing alright…"

"Hopps beat you to the punch, I'm afraid," said Fangmeyer.

"Typical."

"No seriously, how did you guys get out of there?" Delgato asked. "Did Chief Bogo finally get through to them or was it City Hall?"

"I'm not sure," Judy admitted. "One minute, we were sitting in that cell giving up hope, the next minute their chief comes back and tells us we're free to go. He didn't even say why, just that he wanted us all to leave Outback Island and never return."

"Fine with me. I was getting sick of that place anyway," Carla grumbled.

"The guy looked pretty freaked out though," Jimmy noted. "Like something about us just spooked him."

"He  _should_ be afraid."

"Who cares how it happened?" Judy asked, still hugging a fox who actually kind of did care.

It was not the top priority for him though. He needed to discuss the elephant in the room, and he didn't mean Officer Trunkaby. "Hey, Carrots...you seem pretty comfy there and all, but could I possibly get some alone time?"

Judy reeled back in shock. "Oh no, did I hurt you?! I'm so sorry, I-"

"With Jimmy?"

"...Oh." It seemed he was indeed hurting, but not in the way she had expected. "Sure, no problem. Come on, guys."

Carla gave a nod and headed out of the room, brushing past Jimmy.

"Wait, why do  _we_ have to leave?" Delgato questioned. A single, sharp glare from the bunny made her point abundantly clear, and soon everyone was heading out.

"Why do you guys stink?" Carla asked before the door closed, leaving the room devoid of anything but fox.

Nick slowly looked over at his cold counterpart, who maintained eye contact, but not without difficulty.

"Hey."

"Hey."

His brilliant plan didn't account for how awkward this would be. Actually, his plan didn't even extend past this point. So much for foxes and their incredible cunning. If anyone asked, he blamed the concussion. "So...pretty crazy day, huh?"

Jimmy rubbed at his arm. "Yeah. Crazy like a fox."

Nick shuddered involuntarily. Jimmy almost panicked and called for a nurse before the older fox stopped him. "Please...don't use that phrase around me. Ever." He reached for his neck, as if trying to grab something that wasn't there.

"Why not?"

"Just  _don't_."

He could've smacked himself when he saw Jimmy's ears flatten and his tail droop, body language he had seen far too much of already. "S-Sorry, I didn't know-"

"Wait, stop! Don't apologize!"

He jolted up. "Oh, sorry-er, I mean I'll try not to."

This time Nick  _did_ smack himself, a paw colliding with his forehead.  _Better just come out and say it before I somehow make this even worse._

"Don't apologize because  _I_ need to."

Jimmy just stared. Whatever prior image he had of Nick Wilde before this mission, it must have been shattered into hundreds of indistinguishable pieces by now.

"I'm sorry I was a royal jerk to you today, and that I pretty much almost got you killed." Nick continued. "I know I should've been appreciative to have a fan, but honestly...I kind of resented it."

"Why?"

It was a good question, and one he really wished he had an answer to. Unfortunately, even his big mouth failed to produce anything of the sort. Pathetic. How was he supposed to apologize when he couldn't even explain his own actions?

He was staring up at the ceiling, but the sound of padded footsteps made him realize that Jimmy was now standing next to his bed. "Nick, I'm not mad at you, but I still need to know why. What is it about me that you resent?" He looked pained just saying that. "What did I do wrong?"

Nick turned to look at him, so suddenly that it made the arctic fox jump. "What did you just say?"

"That I need to know what-"

"Not that! The other part!"

"What...what did I do wrong?"

The realization struck him like the police motorboat he never got. With that one, familiar question, he no longer saw Jimmy Frost standing before him. He saw a young, naive Junior Ranger Scout with big dreams and little clue.

But unlike himself, Jimmy had never lost his innocence. He hadn't needed an optimistic bunny to set him straight after more than two decades living like a crook. He'd held onto his ideals and grown up into the kind of fox Nick had always wanted to be. It was like looking into a cracked mirror, one that served as a constant reminder of what could have been. And this kid was trying to be more like  _him?_ The thought sickened him to the core.

No, he didn't resent Jimmy. He envied him.

"Nothing, kid. You did nothing wrong." Nick smiled at him softly. "But if I may ask...why  _did_ you join the ZPD?"

Jimmy hesitated, no doubt remembering the last time he had been asked this. This time, however, Nick gave him all the time he needed to answer. "Like I said, I was inspired by you." Nick frowned. "B-But not because of what you've done on the force!" he hastily added.

"Then what was it?" Nick asked, genuinely curious.

Jimmy sighed and sat up on the edge of the cot. Nick sensed a story coming on. "The thing is...I've never really  _had_ anyone to look up to before. My parents work in Tundratown real estate, not the easiest business at the best of times. I wasn't too keen on selling glaciers, but I didn't really have any other ambitions either. And while they were really supportive of me, they were also the only other foxes I knew. Well, aside from Jessica Snow in 8th grade, but boy that did  _not_  work out." He laughed a little, making Nick laugh along with him, a bit forcefully.

"The point is, in terms of peers, I was pretty lacking. Barely any foxes, and I didn't have much luck making friends with other species. So when I graduated from high school, I really didn't have the slightest clue where I was going with my life. I applied to jobs almost at random, but I either wasn't cut out for it, or I was...a fox." Nick nodded sympathetically. Been there, done that. "I settled on shoveling snow for my neighbors. A lucrative job in Tundratown, but hardly fulfilling. One day though, while I was listening to the radio one morning and going about my shovelry, something interesting happened…"

_Jimmy Frost lifted another pile of snow and threw it over his shoulder. The arctic fox was dressed in a thick coat and pants, a knit cap, scarf, and a pair of snow boots. Even as a native of Tundratown, there were limits to how much cold he could take._

_As he continued shoveling, a small radio sat on the hood of a nearby car, playing loud music to put him in the working mood. He was just getting through a rendition of "Breakaway" by Kitty Clarkson when his musical entertainment suddenly shifted into a ZNN report._

" _This just in, we have breaking news regarding the recent closure of what is now being known as the Night Howler Incident," announced the deep voice of Peter Moosebridge. "Having assisted in saving the city from self-destruction mere weeks ago, Nicholas Wilde, a private citizen with a criminal past, has been confirmed as a member of the newest class of the Zootopia Police Academy. Already showing great potential, this fox may well be another promising candidate of the Mammal Inclusion Initiative enacted by former Mayor Lionheart-"_

_Jimmy's ear twitched at the word "fox." He had gotten used to pretty much tuning out news reports like this, but this latest bit of info shocked him to the point of dropping his snow shovel. He'd heard about the Night Howler Incident of course, given that it affected his very livelihood, but it was no surprise that most of the coverage had gone to the bunny. Only now did he learn the species of the other hero who had helped save the city._

_A fox was going to become a police officer? Was that even possible?_

_He grabbed the radio and put it to his ear, as if the closer proximity would somehow give him more information. Unfortunately, the news went right on by this life-changing story and into something about stinky cheese protests in Little Rodentia. That was so unfair._

_But it didn't matter. He had heard all he needed to. If this fox could turn his life into something so extraordinary, what was stopping him from doing the same? He looked down at the discarded snow shovel, almost disdainfully. He couldn't believe he had ever been willing to settle for something so mundane._

_Jimmy Frost made the biggest decision of his life that day. He was going to become a ZPD officer if it killed him._

_And he owed it all to Nicholas Wilde._

"I didn't know you, I didn't even know what you  _looked like_ , but I heard all about this fox who did so much for Zootopia and I was just...amazed," Jimmy admitted bashfully. "Honestly, it didn't even matter  _what_ job you were going into; I would have followed you anyway."

"Sounds like you made the right choice, Mr. Top of His Class."

"Maybe, maybe not. I was such a blank slate at the time that it was easy to mold myself into a ZPD officer. Wasn't like I had anything  _else_ to distract me." He kicked his dangling feet, thinking to himself. "Sometimes...sometimes I wonder if I might've jumped into this too fast."

"One month after me? Yeah, I'd certainly say so." Jimmy looked down. "But I'm not much better myself."

The arctic fox looked at him curiously. "What do you mean?"

"For me, the ZPD was like fulfilling a childhood dream I could never quite reach before," Nick explained. "The thing about childhood dreams though? They don't tend to have a lot of foresight. By that point, I'd gotten so used to fending for myself that I never really grasped just how much being a cop would change everything. Not until I came into work one day and found out, 'Hey, that latest bad guy you're after? Totally your old con partner! How about that?' Feels like it was just yesterday."

"It was this morning."

"What, seriously?!" Talk about a long day.

Nick narrowed his eyes. "Hold on, how do you know about that?"

"You kind of told me when you were, uh, ranting."

"Oh, right." Nick leaned back on the bed. "Then before I embarrass myself any further, are we cool?"

"Of course!" Jimmy grinned.

Nick extended his paw. "Then let's try this again. Nick Wilde."

He shook it. "Jimmy Frost."

"Great! And just to make this mush-fest complete…" Nick reached under the covers and pulled out a small, furry object. "Ta-da!"

"My Wallabeanie!" It was scary how quickly Jimmy snatched the thing out of his paws. "I can't believe you held onto it all this time I was-oh dear." He suddenly pulled away, staring at the toy uneasily.

"Do you believe it now?" Nick asked, pointing to the giant blood stain that covered the front of the white Wallabeanie. "But don't worry, I have a solution. We'll put this thing on EBray, sell it as the one-of-a-kind 'Psycho Killer' Wallabeanie. I guarantee you _someone_  will pay a fortune for it."

Jimmy thought it over for a moment, but ultimately just wrapped his arms around the Wallabeanie again. "Nah, I'll keep it the way it is. Some mammals get an autograph from their heroes. I get their DNA."

"That's really flattering, kid. A bit creepy, but flattering. Just promise me one thing."

"Don't worry, I'm not gonna try to clone you or something."

"Not that." Nick's expression turned serious. "I want you to promise me that you're going to stop following in my footsteps as of today. It's great that you joined the force because of me, but despite what you may think, you're your own mammal, kid. So stop trying to be Nick Wilde 2.0 and just be Jimmy Frost." He smirked. "You'll never top the original anyway."

Jimmy was about to protest, but now that he thought about it, Nick was right. So far, trying to emulate Nick had only gotten him kidnapped and almost bludgeoned to death. Maybe he would have better luck trying out his own methods, whatever those might be.

_If I'm a blank slate, then I guess I'll just have to start filling in those blanks._

Nick tensed up as Jimmy suddenly pulled him into a hug. "Okay, that might be a bit much. Thanks for being easy on the ribs though." He awkwardly patted the arctic fox on the back.

"...No seriously, get off before someone sees."

* * *

_Outback Island_

_7: 42 PM_

The night sky around Outback Island was notoriously bright. On top of the nighttime attractions that lit the place up like a circus tent, the perpetually-moving Roomerang carried that light pollution over to the Mainland and back. It was no Sahara Square, but certainly bright enough to be distracting.

And more than bright enough to ensure that no one noticed the small rowboat slowly paddling across the water.

Simon sat at the back of the boat, phone to his ear. "Mission accomplished, sir. Damien Thornbrush is eliminated and his operation now belongs to you. I'm leaving Outback Island as we speak." He paused. "No, I did not buy you a Wallabeanie." He paused again. "No, I am not going back to buy you a Wallabeanie. The important thing is...oh, so you heard about that."

The raccoon pinched his brow and sighed. "Look, I  _know_ you want him alive. I kind of figured that went without saying." He scowled. "Hey, don't blame me! I got him out of there, didn't I? Sang's the one who dropped the ball!" His expression shifted into horror. "Wait, no, that was not intentional! You know what I meant! Stop laughing! STOP LAUGHING!"

After glaring at his phone for a few more seconds, Simon casually tossed it overboard. "Oops. Butterfingers."

"Who was that?" asked another voice.

"Your new boss. If you're lucky, your interaction with him will be minimal." Simon's gaze hardened. "Especially since he's not going to very pleased about what you did to his quarry."

"We're not very pleased either, mate! We know it was you guys who killed Mr. Thornbrush now. Ya think we're just gonna go along with it?"

Simon pulled his gun, quickly shutting him up. "Interesting point. Would you have preferred the Count  _not_ bailed you out of prison? Or maybe you would have been happier had I just shot you with  _real_ bullets instead of rubber ones. I still can, you know. You think anyone would find your bodies way out here?"

Fangs tried a few times to formulate a rebuttal, but couldn't manage it. "...Fair dinkum."

"Let's just take what we can get before we actually end up dead," Boomer advised, sitting on the opposite end of the boat.

"Why do  _I_ hafta row anyway?"

"Because my arms are too small to use the paddles."

"Bloody roo's, built all wrong…"

Simon sat back, tuning out the bickering naturalists. He had other concerns at the moment. After tonight, one thing had been made abundantly clear: the ZPD were on to them now, and he would be seeing a lot more of them in the near future.

He grinned.  _Good._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's time to say hooroo to the Outback Island arc! It's been a fun ride, but it had to end sometime. Now we move on to bigger and (hopefully) better things.
> 
> So what did you think of Jimmy Frost's backstory? We tried to make something a little more unique than the standard "fanboy story", so I'm curious how it came across. By the way, quick shoutout to the guest reviewer in Chapter 6 who totally called what Nick's deal with Jimmy was. And another shoutout to PresidentStalkeyes for coming up with the name for the hospital.
> 
> The woefully incompetent Precinct 5 belongs to me, as much as that matters since we'll likely never see them again.
> 
> Speaking of cops, I realize there's been a bit of...dispute...as of late over which names for the other ZPD officers are the "correct" ones. We've been using the list on the Disney wiki as our guide, but apparently, some recent blu-ray images came along and threw that into question. And since we're not going to retcon the species of a half-dozen characters, we'll instead just slip on some Nick-style shades and say "Deal with it." So for the rest of this story, Delgato is a tiger and Fangmeyer is a wolf, among other things. We will make sure to always refer to them by species to avoid confusion. (If you can't tell, we're slightly bitter about this.)
> 
> Lastly, here's a fun little contest for you guys: Name Jimmy's Wallabeanie! It's going to be around for the rest of the story, so might as well make it special. Just put a name in your review or PM it to one of us, and we'll decide which one we like most. :)
> 
> A03 Disclaimer: This contest is long over, but you can still suggest names if you want. Any new names from this comment section will be added to the results list just as an acknowledgment. That applies to all future reader questions as well. 
> 
> G'day!


	10. Calling All Challengers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not sure how, but we seem to have had another explosion of followers. Seriously, we got more reviews on the last chapter than any chapter either of us have posted of any story ever. I suspect some kind of conspiracy, but one that I can live with. Bottom line: You guys are amazing and we love you all!
> 
> Shorter chapter this time, but that doesn't mean it isn't an important one.

****

**Chapter 10: Calling All Challengers**

_One Week Later_

Given all that happened just the previous day, Nick's week of recuperation in Saint Bernarde's Hospital was surprisingly uneventful. There were a few  _highlights_  however. To summarize:

\- Chief Bogo put Judy on parking duty and paperwork for the entire duration. Drinking on the job was one thing, even if it was accidental, but to make it worse, the footage of her wrestling with Lucy Sang in the punch bowl had indeed made it onto ZooTube. Even  _worse_ , it had gone viral, and now the Internet was flooded with parodies and reaction videos to what had quickly become known as "Batbunny Begins". Frankly, she was lucky the chief hadn't given her parking duty  _while_  doing paperwork.

\- On the bright side, the same incident had given them more than enough evidence to put out an arrest warrant for Sang, the one who had caused all of this chaos in the first place. It appeared that Judy's initial assessment of the vampire bat had been accurate. She was a wanted criminal in several districts already, her past crimes ranging from burglary to grand larceny. Worse, she was suspected to be responsible for a string of rodent murders, all of the victims completely drained of blood, but nothing could ever be connected to her. Even with a warrant, there was little faith that they would have any easier time catching her.

\- The rookies had mostly been left off the hook, but the chief kept them away from active duty until their mentors were ready for action again. With Judy constantly busy, they naturally spent much of that time hounding Nick in the hospital, Jimmy to check up on him and Carla to chew him out for getting himself injured in the first place. The two extremes balanced each other out and left Nick feeling more amused than anything.

\- Nick taught Jimmy several card games, but as he was trying to steer him  _away_  from the sly fox stereotype, he neglected to show him any of his usual tricks. This somehow led to Jimmy beating him far more often than he found comfortable, without even realizing he was anti-hustling him. One day, the set of cards "mysteriously" disappeared out the hospital window and that was the end of that. At least until Judy came into the room wondering why a stack of cards had come raining down on her head. Nick still wasn't sure how she had gotten him temporary leave just to play 52-Card Pickup on the hot sidewalk.

\- Carla shared her experience with Precinct 5, and after laughing hysterically for three solid minutes, Nick explained to her what "double-entendre" meant. The hyena, having always assumed it was some kind of wrestling move, provided Nick with another great snapshot for his phone. She then called Precinct 5 and loudly ordered them to erase her interrogation footage, followed by her attempting to swim to Outback Island when they refused. Nick made a crack about her "getting wet", resulting in her nearly extending his stay in the hospital.

\- Nick received a few other visitors as well. Most of Precinct 1 showed up in some fashion, thankfully only one or two at a time. He was never good at dealing with people crowding around him. Chief Bogo came too, though he only shared a few words of sympathy, followed by a harsh reprimand, before warning him that they would be having a very long talk once he got back to the station. Nick tried to play up the "poor, injured fox" angle as best he could, but he didn't seem to buy it.

\- Lastly, on the day just before his release from the hospital, Nick received a truly massive blueberry cake as a get well present. It didn't have a card attached, but the sheer size made him strongly suspect Clawhauser as the sender. Nick immediately called over Judy and the rookies to share it with him, though the former refused to eat anything cake-related for at least a few months.

But the fun times had to come to an end eventually. As much as Nick hated the hospital, he knew it was paradise compared to what awaited him at the chief's office. Best case scenario, he could talk his way out of whatever punishment Bogo had in store for him.

Worst case scenario, he might not have to leave the hospital after all.

* * *

_Zootopia Police Department - Precinct 1_

_Chief Bogo's Office_

_11: 47 AM_

"So how's it hangin', chief?"

Did he have any better first words? No, no he didn't.

Chief Bogo was not amused. The cape buffalo sat in his chair, hooves clasped in front of him. He spent the first few minutes of the meeting doing nothing but glare at him through his thin spectacles. This was a common tactic of his, deliberately prolonging the torment of anyone unlucky enough to be here.

Nick knew exactly what the chief was doing, and yet he still struggled to keep his expression neutral. There was too much at stake here to be his usual calm, relaxed self. This wasn't some little white lie about being too friendly with a suspect. Getting his trainee kidnapped on his first day was  _not_  something the chief was going to just brush off.

At least the large brace that had been wrapped around his tail to keep it upright had the side benefit of making him  _always_  look confident, regardless of what the rest of his body language said. It helped that it was his only visible injury as well, the rest of his bloodied bandages hidden beneath his uniform.

"I've spoken with Jimmy Frost," Bogo finally spoke, keeping his tone steady. "According to him, you've been, and I quote, 'a super-amazing mentor'." He glared at him a bit longer, likely suspecting foul play. "In addition, I've looked over the reports from the incident at Dream Time and learned that not only did you play an essential part in Frost's rescue, you also knowingly endangered yourself to protect the lives of the civilians."

Bogo removed the spectacles and slipped them into his front pocket, which normally spelled disaster. "It is for these reasons, and these reasons  _only_ , that you are not handing over your badge right this instant! Is that clear, Wilde?!"

"Y-Yes, sir." His tail would have gone between his legs if it could.

Bogo smiled, pleased to see his subordinate acting like a subordinate for once. "I'm glad you understand. Because as of right now, you're off the case."

Nick shot up in his seat. "But we just solved the smuggling ring case, didn't we? I mean, sure, we may have skipped a few steps here and there, but the end result is-"

" _The end result_  is that another crime lord is dead and Outback Island is in total chaos!" Bogo slammed both hooves on the desk, scattering paperwork. "Furthermore, recent reports have indicated that this smuggling ring case is not as 'solved' as you seem to think it is. Already, we have more sightings of Feral Dream popping up throughout the city as if none of that even happened!"

Nick looked at the floor. There was no doubt about it now. Whoever these guys were, they were systematically eliminating the city's most powerful criminals and taking their place. Thornbrush's death had done nothing but put his business into different hands.

"Look at me when I'm talking to you, Wilde!" Bogo snapped, bringing his attention back to him.

"Sir, with all due respect, I'm the guy with the criminal past. If anyone has a shot of stopping these murders, it's me."

"Your experience could prove valuable," Bogo admitted, "but this situation is bad enough already without me having to worry about your reckless shenanigans! Especially when you've just recovered from serious injury!" His tone shifted for a moment, betraying the true source of the chief's anger. "Next time, you might not be so lucky, and loathe as I am to admit it, I don't want to lose one of my most promising officers."

Before Nick could even process this, let alone argue, Bogo reached for another file. "Instead, I am reassigning you and your team to a less dangerous case, for both you  _and_  my job," he said. "I'm sure you've heard about the 'mystery arsonist' by now?"

"You mean that guy Grizzoli and his boys won't shut up about? Yeah, a little." Knowing he was fighting a losing battle, Nick put on his usual mask of sarcastic indifference.

Bogo was noticeably disappointed by this as he was not the biggest fan of default Nick. "Then as I'm sure you know, this arsonist has targeted buildings all over the city, seemingly at random, which is what made him so 'mysterious' in the first place." He looked over the file, smirking a little. "However, he has recently started torching buildings exclusive to the Rainforest District, making this the opportune time to group up and finally catch him. Grizzoli's team will give you the rest of the details."

A few more seconds passed by in silence.

"Aren't you going to dismiss me?"

"You're an obnoxious orange turd and you aren't nearly as clever as you think you are."

"...That was actually a pretty good setup, sir. I'm proud of you."

"GET OUT!"

Nick got up and left, keeping his signature smirk planted on his face. He gave no further indication that this reassignment bothered him in the slightest.

Good thing he was so skilled at bluffing.

_No way can I just let these crime lord killings go. Not when I'm the one with the best chance of stopping them._

But how would he go about figuring this out when he was already on thin ice? This thing wasn't really worth losing his job over, was it?

At times like this, he knew exactly who to call on.

* * *

_Detention Center_

_12: 16 PM_

Nick couldn't explain his own nervousness. He had just survived Chief Bogo, so why was  _this_  making him so apprehensive? Maybe because there was still a chance of getting this guy to like him, while Bogo was already a lost cause.

He sat himself down in the visitor's room, waiting patiently for his guest. He wasn't even sure if he would actually show up to be perfectly honest. Nick didn't exactly give him a whole lot of reason to.

It took him a second to realize he was already in the room. Unable to see very far over the countertop, Nick didn't see anyone enter until the other mammal awkwardly hopped into the chair on the opposite side of the glass window, glaring at him.

"What do  _you_  want?" Finnick growled.

"Hey, I see they didn't put you in an orange jumpsuit yet. Probably for the best. We both know orange looks  _much_  better on me."

Finnick's eye twitched. "Screw this, I knew I shouldn't have come." He turned back around.

"Wait, wait! Don't go!"

Finnick stopped, but didn't face him. "Talk."

Nick sighed in relief, admonishing himself for almost ruining this conversation in record time. "Okay, I know I said I'd talk to Chief Bogo about your situation, but I've kind of been preoccupied for a while and the chief  _really_  doesn't like me right now. Like, more than usual. So if you could just hold on for a little longer-"

"I  _can't_  hold on any longer!" The fennec fox whirled around and slammed his tiny fist against the glass so hard that Nick could've sworn it made a crack. "For all your big talk, you've never actually been in the slammer, Nicky! So don't try and tell me you know what it's like!"

Maybe not, but Nick had a pretty good feeling what being on the bomb squad was like. "Relax, Finn. Let's just sit down and converse like civilized folk. Don't you want to hear about what's been going on in the outside world?"

"I really don't give a damn, no."

"Finn…"

"Ugh, fine! I know you're just gonna tell me anyway!" Finnick sat down in the chair, lowering him beneath the counter so much that everything below his neck was cut off, making him look like nothing more than a talking head.

_Don't laugh. Don't laugh. Don't laugh._

"What the hell are you laughing about?!"

Scratch that, a  _screaming_  head was even funnier. "I-I-I'm sorry! Just...you remember Damien Thornbrush, right?" he asked, muffling himself with one paw.

Finnick crossed his arms in annoyance, not that he could tell. "Ol' Damien? Yeah, what's he been up to lately?"

Nick's mirth quickly drained away. "Uh...dying...mostly."

"You serious?" Finnick shook his head. "Wow. Can't say I'm too surprised though. Guy was kind of asking for it with all that 'Drop Bear' crap. Guess someone finally dropped  _him._ "

"You should also know that he was the one behind the Feral Dream operation," Nick clarified.

Finnick's face turned downright murderous. "And he had me dealing with some itchy dingo instead of letting me into his inner circle?! You know what, screw him! He was  _definitely_  asking for it!"

"Let me remind you that his 'inner circle' consisted entirely of naturalists."

"I was  _already_  struggling to keep clothes on my back! What do I care?!" He threw his arms up in the air like he indeed didn't care.

"But that's not all. Mr. Big has been murdered as well."

"I'm sorry, what?!" He cared now, his jaw dropping in astonishment. "How did _that_  happen?!"

Nick scratched the back of his neck. "Well…"

Finnick wasn't known for being the quietest of individuals, yet he didn't say a word during Nick's entire explanation. (No family-friendly words anyway.) When Nick was finished, he thought for a second that he might have broken him.

"So let me get this straight," he said slowly. "Some nutjob is going around whacking crime bosses and merging their operations into one giant syndicate?"

"That's about the gist of it."

"Huh." Finnick leaned back in his seat, putting a paw to his forehead in stunned silence. "I gotta say, this really puts my own problems into perspective. I mean, I'm locked up right now, but I could be  _dead._   _You_  could be dead." He saw Nick flinch. "Holy shit, don't tell me you almost ended up dead!"

Nick lifted his shirt, showing off his array of bandages. "Define 'almost'."

Finnick shouted a very loud word that might have cracked the glass just a little more. "What the hell happened to you?!"

"Let's just say I learned first-paw about that Feral Dream of yours," he said, pulling his shirt back down. "It was really more of a nightmare. Totally false advertising."

Finnick just stared at where the injuries used to be. "Well, if that doesn't make us even, I don't know what does."

"Then at least  _something_  good came out of this," Nick sighed. "Because not only did us stopping the smuggling ring actually do nothing to stop the smuggling ring, now I don't even get to investigate the murders anymore. Chief Buffalo Butt put us on a nice, 'safe' job tracking down some pyromaniac."

"Oh yeah, I've heard about that guy," said Finnick, casually digging a claw through his ear. "He's been going around lightin' up buildings all over the city, right?"

"So I've heard, but now he's apparently got a thing for the Rainforest District in particular."

He paused. "That's...odd."

"Yeah, guess he found a good fast-food joint there or something."

"No, I mean...it's the  _Rainforest District._  What's the one thing that place is generally known for?"

Nick blinked. "Rain."

"Exactly," Finnick said, hopping onto the counter and putting his paws up against the glass. "So why's this guy trying to light fires in the single hardest place to light fires?"

"What, are you trying to be a cop now? It's a little late for that."

"Just answer the question!"

"I don't know, okay!" Nick admitted. "Why are you grilling me on  _this_  all of a sudden? It's nice that you're trying to help, but frankly, I care a lot more about these crime lord murders than someone's fire fetish. It's not like this is going to lead me...to…"

Nick cut himself off, suddenly remembering something  _else_  the Rainforest District was known for.

"Finnick, you're a genius!"

" _One of us_  has to be."

"Because you're my friend, I'm going to ignore that remark." Nick practically skipped out of his seat. "See you soon, buddy! I'll bring back something from Bug Burga!"

He closed the door, leaving Finnick sitting there with no one but his guards.

"Sure! You can go now! I didn't want any social interaction anyway!" He jumped straight from the table to the floor, kicked over his chair, then returned to his cell while sputtering angrily to himself.

 _Marks my words, I'm getting out of here, Nicky. With or_ without _your help._

* * *

_Nick's Cluttered Desk_

_12: 47 PM_

"Nick, what is going on?"

Judy didn't know why Nick had suddenly called the whole team over to his desk, or why he was grinning so widely that she could count every one of his carnivorous teeth, but it was kind of freaking her out.

"You think maybe he never got over that concussion?" asked Carla.

Nick's face shifted, putting a paw to his chest in faux-horror. "That almost sounded like a joke, Carla. Maybe I  _do_  still have a concussion."

"Nick, I just spent the last week giving out more tickets than the Meowerball. Can you please just be straight with us for once?" Judy pleaded.

"Well, if you must know, I think I just found a lead on our case," he smiled back.

" _Which_  case?" she asked suspiciously. "Don't think we don't know about the reassignment. In fact, I was about to go talk to Grizzoli before you pulled us in here."

"Trust me, Carrots," he said, turning to his computer and flexing his fingers. "We're about to hit two perps with one stone."

"So...this  _is_  about the new case?" asked Jimmy, confused.

"Yes and no." He started typing something into the ZPD database. "Tell me, what do you guys know about Zootopia's crime lords?"

"Nick…" Judy said warningly.

"Trust me," he repeated. "And answer me too, if you please."

She rubbed her temples. "Before this, I only knew about Mr. Big. And only because you almost got us iced by him."

Jimmy gasped. "Seriously? Why didn't  _I_  know about this?"

"Probably because I didn't want you to," Nick answered. "Anyway, Mr. Big was only one of several major crime lords, each controlling their own territory in Zootopia and carrying out their own operations. Mr. Big held dominion over Tundratown, running a 'transportation' service that carried his victims from one life to the next. Damien Thornbrush sat his fluffy little tail down on Outback Island, using Feral Dream to spread his naturalist agenda."

Judy's foot added a drum beat to his monologue. "Thanks for the recap, but what does this have to do with-"

"Ah, ah, ah. What's a five-letter word that starts with 't'?"

"...Trust."

"Good, you're learning. Now let's learn some more." He finally found what he was looking for and pulled up a police file. "With Big and Thornbrush out of the picture, that leaves only three major players still in the running. The first is this guy."

Out of curiosity, the other officers crowded around the desk, looking over his shoulder. On the screen in front of them was an image of what appeared to be a small sand cat with bleached tan fur standing atop a stage. The feline was wrapped up in a thick brown poncho and wore a sombrero several sizes too large, covering his eyes. He had a smile that seemed charming at first glance, but was undoubtedly fake. His whiskers were bent at an odd angle, making them look more like a poorly-trimmed mustache.

"Sandcat Sanchez, crime lord of Sahara Square. Eccentric mariachi player by day, ruthless kingpin by night. He runs a gambling ring from a little neighborhood known as New Mexicow, getting gullible mammals to place bets on his underground luchador battles. Of course, they're not exactly fair fights, for the wrestlers  _or_  their hapless fans, but good luck proving it."

"Carla, are you okay?" Jimmy asked.

The hyena's fists and teeth were clenched tightly, glaring at the image on the monitor. It took her a second to even notice the question. "Huh? Oh, it's n-nothing."

Nick moved right along as if he hadn't even noticed. The next image easily got everyone's attention again. Judy squinted at the screen. "Wha...what  _is_  that?"

The image showed a large expanse of water, surrounded by buoys and boardwalks. That wasn't what caught their eye though. In the center of all of this, they could see  _something_  sticking out of the water. Something that was long and pointy, connected to a dark mass. They could barely make the thing out, but it definitely seemed to be some kind of animal.

Nick just watched them stew over this a little before finally solving the mystery. "That, my friends, is Piers Narwhalter, crime lord of the Docks. It's a district filled with aquatic mammals. You know, those kind you barely hear about. He's an information broker, and rumor has it that he's got a network of water tunnels that he's used to build an espionage network over the entire city. Can't say I know for sure, as the guy reeeeeeally doesn't like most predators, namely the fish-eating kind. Guess it hits too close to home for him."

"I've never seen anything like that," Jimmy said, completely awed.

"And if you're lucky, you never will." Nick turned back to the screen. "Lastly, the one that concerns  _us_. Carrots, you can stop that foot now."

She begrudgingly did. The last image he showed them was not quite as cryptic, but definitely more hectic. It portrayed a group of wolves crowded around some kind of bar, standing next to a row of motorcycles. Each of the bikes was heavily tampered with, to the point that various deadly weapons were attached to their frames. They were all marked with a peculiar symbol, a white crescent moon with a wolf skull jutting out to the left, jaws opened wide. The wolves themselves looked about as sophisticated as their rides would suggest, dressed in typical biker gear and frozen in various poses of rowdy laughter and rough-housing. There even appeared to be one bent over and vomiting, thankfully out-of-frame.

"They look...fun," Judy said, disturbed by the very sight.

"Annemarie Luna, more commonly known as 'Lady Lang', crime lord of the Rainforest District. A cold, calculating businesswoman to most people, but a loving mother to her wolf pack, a literal crime family. Lang has a major extortion racket over the mammals living in the district. If she wants something, she  _gets_  it, one way or another. A lot of it is spare junk and vehicle parts that her lovely children here use to trick out their bikes and scare the crap out of people to get even more junk. They bust it up doing stupid biker things and then 'sell' it back to the original owners for double the price. As long as she makes money in the process, she's fine spoiling her kids rotten with all the toys they want."

"Wait a minute, I don't see a woman anywhere in that picture, let alone a  _lady,_ " Carla pointed out.

"For good reason. While most of her family aren't exactly subtle, Lang herself prefers to stay out of the limelight. In fact, no one outside of said family ever gets to see her in person, or even know where she is. Which is probably why our crime lord killers have been having so much trouble with her."

Judy did a double-take. "Wait, what? What does this have to do with...oh…"

"I see you're finally catching on," Nick said, smirking at them. "Don't you find it weird that two of these bigshots get killed in two days and yet we haven't heard a peep out of Simon & Friends for the past  _week?_  Now, what  _have_  we heard about? That's right, our friendly neighborhood arsonist suddenly taking an interest in the Rainforest District. We don't know which buildings he's targeted so far, but how much do you wanna bet they all belong to Lady Lang?"

"The arsonist is working for them!" Judy gasped. "And now they're trying to lure out Lang!"

"Nailed it," he said, grinning confidently despite the fact that he had only just figured this out himself thanks to Finnick. But they didn't need to know that.

"So what now? We track down these other crime lords and  _save_  their culos?" asked Carla, clearly not thrilled by the idea.

"I hate to admit it, but I kind of don't like that either," Jimmy said, tapping his claws together.

"I know it's our job to serve and protect, but these guys all seem pretty bad," Judy hesitantly agreed.

Nick turned his chair around to face them. "Look, I know you've all been trained to think that having less criminals is better for the city, but sometimes that isn't the case. If whoever's masterminding this is really capable of running all of these operations at once, then they're more dangerous than all of them combined."

"And if they're not?" Jimmy asked cautiously.

"Then the entire criminal underworld falls into anarchy. And let me tell you, if you think organized crime is bad,  _dis_ organized is a lot worse."

His argument had, if nothing else, gotten some reluctant nods. "The mastermind..." Judy said quietly. "Sang told me that she and Simon were taking orders from someone she called 'the Count'. Do you know anyone like that?"

Nick snorted. "The Count, huh? For someone who's done  _this_  much, he's pretty lacking in the creativity department." He put on a thick, Slothic accent. "One murder! Two murder! AH AH AH!"

"Nick, this is serious!"

"I know. I'm the one who had to tell  _you_  that," he countered. "Anyway, I don't know anyone who goes by that silly name, but I'm afraid that doesn't mean a thing."

"What do you mean?"

He looked down in resignation. "I've made a lot of enemies, Fluff. And a lot more I probably don't even know about. The Count could be anyone. An ex-con partner, an ex-con  _victim,_  some nameless pedestrian I pickpocketed once. If there's one thing I've learned over the years, it's that people can swear revenge over any number of things that you and I would find downright petty."

Carla stared at him expectedly. "And why exactly are we assuming he has something against  _you?_ "

He looked up at them, his expression hard. "I could be dead right now. I almost  _was._  The only reason I'm still walking around to tell you all of this is because that raccoon, Simon, saved my life."

"What?" Judy gasped softly. The rookies were just as floored.

"Why would he do that?" Nick continued. "If he just wanted to kill Fangs and Boomer, he could've easily let them rip out my throat first. Instead, he shot them off of me, and even though I had just witnessed him commit murder, he let me live. Why?" he pressed.

He didn't get an answer. "I'll tell you why. It's because this Count, whoever he is,  _seriously_  has it out for me. And he doesn't want anyone getting to me except him. Saving me was not a mercy, it was a death sentence."

"Don't you think you're being a little paranoid?" Carla asked skeptically.

"Paranoid? Alright, let me ask you something, Snickers." He leaned towards her, glaring darkly. "How about  _you_  try living on the streets for two solid decades and then tell me how 'paranoid' I am. If I wasn't so 'paranoid', I wouldn't have even made it to that lounge at Dream Time. I would've been lucky to make it to  _puberty!_ "

Seeing her shocked reaction, and everyone else's, Nick realized that he had said too much about his past. His defense mechanism instantly kicked in, returning his expression to calm and unreadable.

"So yeah. Let's go get that arsonist."

"Alright!" Jimmy shouted, brushing it right off. "With the five of us working together, we'll bag em' in no time!"

"Five?" asked Judy. "Did we get  _another_  new recruit?" As much as she welcomed the opportunity to train another officer, she hardly thought their performance so far warranted it.

"Uh huh! The four of us, plus Wallace!" He reached into his back pocket and pulled out the white Wallabeanie, now dressed in a miniature police uniform that conveniently covered its unsightly blood stain, another idea he had taken from Nick. He still needed to work on that.

"You still have that thing?" Judy asked curiously.

"You named it  _Wallace?_ " Nick added.

"Of course. You get it? It's like a mix of 'Wallabie' and 'ice', because it fits with my name and-"

Nick stopped him. "First of all, don't explain the joke. Second of all, that's not really what I was getting at."

"I thought you were teaching him to be _less_  like you," Judy whispered.

"I'm teaching him to not be sly and conniving. If I can't teach him my natural vulpine wit, then what do I have left?"

"Let's go break-in the ice!" Jimmy yelled, one arm wrapped around Wallace and the other pumped in the air as he paraded off.

"Better, but tone down the volume," Nick advised, trailing after him.

"Boys," Judy and Carla muttered. They glanced at each other in surprise, then did a small fist-bump.

* * *

_Rainforest District_

_1: 32 PM_

"If you want something done right, you gotta do it yourself. Isn't that how it always happens?"

The lush foliage of the rainforest canopy hung over the street as a lone vehicle traveled down its path. It was a limousine, long and pitch black in color, with tinted windows. After all, its occupants benefited greatly from the privacy.

The black-suited tiger who drove the car glanced nervously into his rearview mirror. It wasn't often that the Count had to come out and deal with these matters personally, but this lack of progress over the past week had brought even  _his_  renowned patience to an end. The tiger wasn't sure if driving him was a privilege or a punishment. It wasn't like he could expect a promotion out of something this menial. He was more likely to say something to tick him off and end up dead on the side of the road.

"Absolutely right, Count R-"

"Shush! I'm talking to  _myself._  I don't need the commentary."

Definitely no promotion. The driver elected to shut up before the position of roadkill opened up.

In the backseat of the limo, a sole figure crossed one leg over the other, staring down at a phone in his paw. With a clawed finger, he casually scrolled down through a list of news articles, reading each title to himself.

_"First Fox Officer Joins the ZPD: Nicholas Wilde Receives His Badge!"_

_"Rookie Fox Cop Takes Wilde Ride Through Sahara Square!"_

_"A Hero Falls: Officer Wilde Brings a Wake-Up Call to Feral Dream!"_

_"Nick Wilde Makes Heroic Recovery: Awaits His Return to Duty!"_

He snarled, the phone shaking with the power of his rage. Just seeing these headlines made his blood boil, let alone the context. If he weren't so composed, the device would have already been flung through the window. Not out,  _through._

"So, you think you can forget your past, Nicholas? Well, it's not going to forget  _you._ "

Putting the phone away for now, he reached into the front pocket of his suit and pulled out a small paper. A simple, but significant list, the first two items crossed out in red ink.

~~_Big_ ~~

~~_Thornbrush_ ~~

_Lang_

_Sanchez_

_Narwhalter_

He stared intently at the remaining three names, visualizing a nice red stripe through each of them. His other paw hovered over a long, thin cane, rolling it back and forth almost playfully. He smiled.

"One by one, you will all fall. And then Nicholas...you will be  _mine!_ "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We had an inordinate amount of trouble coming up with a title for this chapter. Really, we probably should've called it "The Chapter Where We Tease the Crap out of You", but that wouldn't have fit. Just from these little snippets, which of the upcoming arcs/crime lords are you most interested in? Anything else stick out to you? I would imagine yes.
> 
> Lady Lang, Sandcat Sanchez, and Piers Narwhalter belong to me. Quick shoutout to MusicaLoraineJourney over on Discord for helping me come up with that last name.
> 
> As you can see, we've also chosen the winner for the "Name Jimmy's Wallabeanie" contest. Wallace was just too good of a pun to ignore, even though the original comment didn't even suggest it for that reason. A big congrats to PresidentStalkeyes anyway. Because there were some other great suggestions made, we'll list all of them:
> 
> Wallabloody, Wildebeanie - The Grey Coincidence
> 
> Francis - Baneblade
> 
> Psychobie - Whitewolf
> 
> Fro yo - Raymesiris
> 
> Wallabeanie 2.0, Skippy, Joey - Unspecified Guest
> 
> Officer McGrowly, McGrowlavich - Cimar of Turalis WildeHopps
> 
> Killer Jimmy- vdbroeckt
> 
> Thank you to everyone who participated! We might do more contests like this in the future so keep a look out! :)


	11. Picking up the Scent

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let's get into what shall be colloquially known as the Lang Family arc, because we like putting stories into neat little boxes apparently. That said, I guess we'll call the first five chapters the Big arc? The Beginning Shit arc? The Kristy Elkwood arc? In any case, let's get on with it.
> 
> But first, another piece of fanart from malachitecat, this one featuring, among other things, Carla Hyenandez. A pretty good rendition. Find it at https://www.deviantart.com/malachitecat/art/Zootopia-Fanfiction-OCs-Carla-and-Sam-618390883 and revel in hyena goodness.

****

**Chapter 11: Picking Up the Scent**

_Rainforest District_

_3: 03 PM_

"Why is he calling me  _now?_ "

Lucy Sang let out a loud yawn as she woke up and stretched her wings. She was having such a good dream too: loads and loads of money, plus the miserable faces of those she took it from. Adjusting the grip of her clawed feet on the hanging branch, Lucy reached up and pulled a tiny phone from inside her jumpsuit. Using a wing to shield her eyes from the sun, she squinted at the caller ID:

Count Cheapskate

"Damn." Giving another yawn, she put the phone up to one of her large ears. "With all due respect, sir, it's like three in the afternoon. What do you want?"

As she reoriented herself with the waking world, it took her a second to realize she was being spoken to. "Huh? Oh, right, right. The job. Yeah, not really my problem this time. Isn't this what we brought in the pyro for?"

She rubbed at her eyes as she waited for the response. "So this one's been a bit trickier than you thought. I know Simon promised that this would be done by now. Take that up with him." An ear twitch. "Then give him  _another_  phone! Don't tell me you can't afford it! I'm still not seeing how any of this is  _my_  problem, by the way!"

Her fangs clenched tightly. "...Yes, I know who signs my check. Fine, I'll help out. I take it you have a plan?"

The vampire bat had to hold the phone away from her ear at the loud tirade that followed. It startled her so much that one of her feet lost hold of the branch and she had to flap her wings a few times to reattach herself. "Alright, alright! Of  _course_  you have a plan! You don't need to get so indignant!"

She could already tell it was going to be one of  _those_  days. "Well, don't leave me in suspense. Whaddya got?"

By nature, Lucy Sang was a very cruel and vindictive individual, the result of spending her whole life as an outcast to society. She had seen and done many things that most would consider unforgivable, even against her own family. So she was no stranger to the darker side of mammality. But what she heard next was enough to give even her pause.

For all of two seconds.

The bat burst into loud, cackling laughter, clutching one hand to her side for support. " _Wow!_ That is pure  _evil!_ You're really gonna do that to the poor guy?! Oh, oh  _holy guano_  that is too much! Ahahahahahahaha!"

By the time she recovered, he had already hung up.

* * *

_Grizzoli's Patrol Car_

_3: 10 PM_

Unsurprisingly, it was raining. The thin droplets splattered against the windows of the large police vehicle, covering it in water and making their current assignment all the more ironic.

"I apologize in advance for the smell of wet dog, sir," said Jimmy Frost from the backseat, normally the place where suspects would be locked up. He didn't seem to mind though, even strapping Wallace into the seat next to him.

"Don't worry about it. Hardly the worst thing I'm going to be smelling today," Officer Grizzoli replied. The giant polar bear drove the car with a casual grace unbefitting of his species.

"Seems like it would be pretty hard to light a place on fire in these conditions," Judy noted, riding next to him. As usual, she felt tiny in comparison, but she had long gotten used to it.

"It's easier than you think as long as you have the right materials," said Grizzoli. "Even so, we can't figure out what this guy is thinkin' setting up shop here. Maybe he just wanted a challenge? Seems pretty silly given how much easier he's made it for us to find him. Not that we  _have_ as of yet…"

Judy held her tongue, resisting the urge to spill their suspicions about the arsonist's motives. Technically, that was still only Nick's theory, plausible as it was. She wasn't obligated to share it with the other officers, right? Until the connection was confirmed, that was only going to muddle the investigation.

_There I go again rationalizing to circumvent the law. I'd feel a lot better about my job if I didn't have to do that so much._

Thinking about this conundrum made her think about Mr. Big, which made her think about the crime lord murders, which made her think about what Nick had told them, which made her think about her current conundrum, which made her think about Mr. Big-and now she really needed to change the subject before she drove herself insane. "So where are we heading right now exactly?"

"Old parking garage down on Moss St. It's long since abandoned to the public, but our correspondents in Precinct 4 have told us about some strange reports they've gotten on the place. Loud mechanical noises, old cars appearing and disappearing at random, shady figures, etc."

_Sure sounds like a Lady Lang operation alright._

"Aren't you going to ask what this has to do with the arsonist?"

Judy flinched. "O-Of course! I was just wondering that!"

"Really?" Jimmy shifted in his seat. "I thought we already-"

"So you think this place is going to be a target, right?!" Judy asked loudly.

"...Right," Grizzoli said, greatly confused. "So far, most of this guy's targets around the Rainforest District have had 'shady' written all over them. We're still trying to piece together how it's all connected, but we haven't found any direct leads yet." Judy struggled to stay silent yet again, while mentally willing Jimmy to do the same.

Thankfully, he seemed to get the memo. "What about the arsonist's previous targets? Before he started going after the Rainforest District?"

"That's the weird thing. We couldn't find any connection whatsoever between his previous targets. Clothing store, pawn shop, train station, medical clinic, souvenir stand, he got the full gamut," Grizzoli explained. "The only thing they had in common was that they all happened to be abandoned at the time. If that weren't the same story here, we wouldn't be sure if this was even the same guy."

"Are we? It still seems like a pretty flimsy link," Judy noted.

"Trust me, we're sure." He indeed sounded absolutely certain. "I'll tell you more once we get there, but let's just say he leaves a very...distinct...calling card."

* * *

_The 'Monster Truck'_

_3: 10 PM_

The mission had just started, but as far as Nick was concerned, it was already going disastrously.

Wanting to give the rookies more "varied" training, Chief Bogo had split Nick and Judy between the two patrol cars  _and_ placed them with the cadet they were less familiar with, which meant that right when he was starting to get along with Jimmy, now he was stuck with Humorless Hyenandez. On top of that, Officer Delgato was now driving his own car, on the logic that he had a better idea where they were going. While Nick was still reeling from this encroachment on his territory, Fangmeyer twisted the knife by immediately calling shotgun. He had never thought of wolves as ambush predators before today.

Now he was trapped in the back with Carla, who had deprived him of even the satisfaction of getting to "accidentally" kick the back of Fangmeyer's seat by choosing to sit behind him. This left Nick sitting behind Delgato, who he couldn't even see past, literally the worst possible seat in the vehicle.

Overall, a very rough day.

"You okay back there?" Delgato asked. Mockingly, Nick decided.

"I'm fine," he snapped, crossing his arms. "Just because I've got all these 'dingoroo' wounds, that doesn't mean I'm suddenly fragile."

Delgato shrugged. "I'm like three times your size. I  _always_ see you as fragile."

"A likely story."

"Where are we going?" asked Carla, as unconcerned with Nick's problems as ever.

"A local Burger Alpha on Misty Blvd. The place just cleared out due to a foul odor complaint."

Nick set aside the seating issue for a moment.  _Okay, I get the wolf theme, but that's not exactly what I was expecting._ "I thought we were looking for an arsonist, not an aromatherapist."

"I know it sounds weird, but this is the best lead we've gotten for a long time," Fangmeyer insisted. "You'll see what we mean when we get there."

"Or  _smell_ what you mean?"

"Exactly. But we have to hurry," Delgato said, turning his head for a second to look at him.

"Is that why you just ran that stop sign?"

"WHAT?!" The big cat whirled back around to face the road, panicking. Nick smirked, grabbing his phone from his pocket and getting ready to grab another photo-op.

"There was no stop sign! Relax!" Carla yelled.

Nick shoved the phone back in his pocket and turned to face her, an unsettling stare in his eyes.

_It's official: you and I will never be friends._

* * *

_Grizzoli's Patrol Car_

_3: 13 PM_

"Hey, Judy, can I ask you something?"

The bunny's ears quirked back in Jimmy's direction. "Sure, what is it?"

"What was  _your_ first day on the force like?"

Judy frowned. Her story was a well-known one, but that first day was (thankfully) not brought up much. "Parking duty." She shuddered. The previous week had made her never want to hear those two words again, let alone speak them.

"Oh." The arctic fox seemed disappointed. "Guess you didn't go through anything as cool as getting kidnapped, huh."

"Sure I did." If 'cool' was really the word to use here. "But not until my second day. That was when I had my first foot chase through Little Rodentia. Also my last because of the restraining order."

"Nice!" he smiled, ignoring the last part. "What about Nick?"

She noticed he had stopped referring to him as "Officer Wilde". "Not too bad. We pulled over a sloth for speeding."

"...Is that a joke?"

"Surprisingly, no."

"Guess I'm just lucky then. Isn't that right, Wallace?"

He reached over and put a claw under the Wallabeanie's chin, moving it up and down while putting on a falsetto. " _That's right, Jimmy!"_

"Okay, I have to know. What  _is_ that thing and why is it impersonating an officer?" Grizzoli asked, looking back at the stuffed toy as if it were some kind of foreign disease; fascinating, but not something to get too close to.

Judy giggled, just imagining how this scene must look. "Well, it's a long story, but it all started on Outback Island when-WATCH OUT!"

Grizzoli, momentarily distracted by the Wallabeanie, failed to spot the other vehicle as it pulled out in front of them. The patrol car slammed into its side, sending both vehicles careening out of control as Grizzoli slammed on the breaks reflexively. Aided by the already slippery conditions on the wet road, the patrol car hydroplaned and veered off of the side, crashing through a thicket of vines before finally coming to a stop when it plunged into a marsh.

For a few moments, the car just sat there as the officers inside shoved away their respective airbags. For Judy, the impact of the bag could have been more dangerous than the crash itself, but she got out with only minor bruising. As soon as she got unbuckled, the bunny flung herself from the window and onto dry land, bypassing the marsh entirely. Grizzoli, not nearly as nimble, had to trudge through the muck himself, Jimmy riding on his shoulder, and Wallace riding on  _his_ shoulder. When the bear emerged, nearly his entire lower half was brown. To complete the scene, the rain was still coming down, even harder now. "This...is not going to look good on my record."

"Forget about that, we have to get this squared away with that driver!" Judy yelled, her mind squarely on the law like usual.

She rushed out of the thicket as quickly as she could, just in time to see the other vehicle, a dark black limousine, pull away and speed off down the road. She couldn't so much as catch a glimpse of its license plate. Growling to herself, Judy stomped back over to the marsh. "Great! Now we have to track down that nice gentlemammal before he sues the entire department!"

"I thought we were trying to find a parking garage. Did that change?" asked Jimmy. He had fit Wallace into his pocket like an actual wallaby in a pouch.

Judy took a deep breath to calm herself down. "No...it's fine. But this is definitely going to make that more difficult. Grizzoli, get that car out of the marsh!"

"But I just  _came_ from the marsh!" he protested.

As Jimmy watched the following exchange, it continued to impress him how a two-foot bunny could so consistently dominate much large mammals. Grizzoli was back in the grime and pushing the car within the next minute.

"Wallace says he's sorry, Officer Grizzoli!" Jimmy called out to him. "Right, Wallace?"

He pushed Wallace down into a bow and put on the falsetto again. " _I'm sooooooory!"_

Grizzoli chose not to dignify that with a response.

* * *

_Burger Alpha_

_3: 25 PM_

Hiding the patrol car behind a large underbrush, the officers approached their destination. It was as impressive as it sounded: a rundown brick building with visibly overflowing trash bins and a giant wolf mascot sitting on its roof. The wolf appeared to be rearing its head back and howling, though the burger sitting in its mouth made Nick wonder if it was actually choking instead.

A little-known competitive "rival" to Bug Burga, the fast-food chain Burger Alpha was a franchise exclusive to the Rainforest District. Mainly because its palette was so downright unappealing that no one outside of the district would touch it with a ten-foot pole. And the only reason mammals  _inside_ the district did was because it, like many other things around here, was owned by Lady Lang. When one of her pack gave you a "recommendation" for the new Burger Alpha special, it meant you had damn well better go buy it before your carcass ended up on the menu instead. Not that they cared if you actually  _ate_ the stuff as long as they made a profit, but many felt that the fees were so exorbitant that they needed to get something out of it. For those who didn't want that "something" to be acid reflux, the food went straight into the trash, where it sat in this humid climate for days at a time.

So it wasn't like the place smelled like a rose garden even on its best days, but somehow, it was even worse than usual.

" _Yikes_ , you were not kidding about the stink," Nick groaned, clamping a paw over his sensitive nose. Carla and Delgato were quick to join him while Fangmeyer, being a wolf himself, needed both paws.

"You're not the one who had to spend  _weeks_  around this stuff. Don't complain," Delgato chided, his voice nasally.

"And what exactly is 'this stuff'?" He knew he had smelled this somewhere before, but he just couldn't put his finger on it. For someone so used to knowing everything about everything, that bothered him. Not that he was willing to free his nose and examine it any closer, mind you.

"We'll show you," Fangmeyer said, gesturing his head in the direction of the building.

"We really have to go in there?" asked Carla hesitantly. As a natural scavenger, seeing this much discarded food should have been appetizing to her. It wasn't.

"It's fine. We've done this before. Unfortunately." Indeed, Delgato and Fangmeyer made their way inside the building with as much skill as could be expected from such a task. Nick briefly considered just staying put, but his natural curiosity won out and he followed after them.

"You guys have fun with that. I'll be lookout," Carla said, shoving her curiosity into the trash with the rest of the junk. She went off to find a hiding spot without so much as a second glance.

Nick tried to ignore the feeling that he had just been conned and pushed open the doors to the establishment. The interior of Burger Alpha looked even more desolate, condiments and beverages strewn over the tile floors, and a flurry of bugs, that may or may not have been part of the menu, flying around in swarms.

"And I thought it smelled bad...on the outside!"

"Less snarking, more searching, Ham Solo," Delgato said, crouched behind the front counter. Fangmeyer was busily nudging tables and chairs aside with anything other than his front paws.

"Searching for what?"

"The source," Fangmeyer coughed. "And quickly, before I pass out."

Nick padded across the floor, looking every which way for whatever he was supposed to be looking for. Despite Delgato's suggestion, he didn't stop talking. "Could you at least give me a hint? Like twenty questions. Is it a person, place, or thing? Is it larger than a breadbox? Is it-?" Nick suddenly tripped, falling on his face and shoving his paw into his nose. Rubbing his sore snout, the fox looked back at the object that had felled him. "...small, black, and cylindrical?"

Delgato's head shot up from behind the counter. "And he finds it in thirty seconds. Of course."

"Leave it to Wilde to literally stumble over the evidence," Fangmeyer grumbled.

"You're just jealous I have a knack for this kind of thing," Nick replied shortly, reaching for the object.

"Finding evidence or falling on your face?"

"Little of A, little of B." Picking it up in his free paw, Nick turned it side to side to examine it. It  _was_ a cylinder, but only the bottom half of one, the top half blown to bits like a party popper. It was clear this object was the source of the overpowering stench, as Nick found his eyes watering up the more he looked at it. He took particular notice of the color palette. It was a black can, but the bottom rim was stark white, creating a pattern that almost resembled...

"It's skunk spray," Nick realized, sticking out his tongue in disgust. He never thought he would have to deal with  _that_ foul substance again. There was a good reason he wanted to pawn off that skunk butt rug and it wasn't just the money.

"Lovely, isn't it?" Fangmeyer asked sardonically.

"Can someone just tell me why our arsonist used skunk-in-a-can while I'm still coherent?"

"To put it simply, it's a homemade stink bomb," Delgato replied. "Our guy has a habit of chucking one through the window of any place he targets. As you can imagine, it clears out the residents pretty quickly. Shortly thereafter, he sneaks in and lights the place up without anyone to stop him. But we don't know his MO _exactly_ , as this is the first time we've ever gotten here before the 'lighting up' part."

"Well...that's not entirely true," Fangmeyer said quietly.

Not quietly enough for Nick to miss it though. "Oh? Do I sense a story here?" he asked, smiling innocently.

Delgato sighed...and immediately choked on skunk fumes. "Ugggh. The only other time we came this close was at an abandoned pub in Tundratown. This was back when the arsonist was a lot more erratic, so we were checking out potential targets almost at random. We were lucky to stumble upon the place when we did."

"Or so we thought," said Fangmeyer.

"We did find the first of those cans at least," Delgato continued, "but only because it flew in through the window while we were still looking around. Then Fangmeyer's reflexes kick in and he  _catches_  the thing."

"In his mouth?" Nick asked.

"In my paws!" he growled, which sounded much less threatening with the nasally filter. "Anyway, before Delgato and I can even figure out what it is, it blows up in our faces!"

"Ouch." Nick winced sympathetically, while also holding back a laugh.

"Now Fangmeyer, having one of the best noses on the force, takes one whiff and drops like a lead weight. I wasn't so fortunate and had to stumble my way out of the building half-blinded and coughing up my lungs. I thought maybe I could at least catch a glimpse of the guy who did it." Delgato shook his head. "Of course, since the purpose of the bomb was to clear us out, he was already long gone by the time I got out of there. He never came back either. Guess he saw the cops lurking around and knew we were keeping an eye on the place."

"So  _that's_ why you guys smelled so bad when you came to visit me at the hospital." One mystery solved, only forty more to go.

"And it's also why we hid the patrol car before we came in here. Our plan now is to lay low and wait for our perp to show up, then ambush him." Delgato took a glance out of the window as if he were expecting to see him right there.

"As much as we  _really_  don't want to stay in here," Fangmeyer said, in the process of stuffing napkins up his nostrils, "we can't afford to let this arsonist skunk get away again."

"Not necessarily a skunk," Nick argued. "Could be another mammal that just has access to skunk spray. The stuff's pretty big on the black market in certain circles."

"Whatever! Just hide somewhere!"

Nick shrugged, leaving Delgato and Fangmeyer hiding behind tables and counters while he headed through the back door into the kitchen. The more distance he could get from that can, the better.

He regretted his decision instantly. If he thought the serving area of the restaurant was nasty, the kitchen was much of the same, just taken up several more degrees. It was so bad that he had to tiptoe around the area just to avoid stepping in anything that would require a thorough foot-scrubbing to remove.

But he would look foolish if he went back now, so he put on his best smile and just went with it. Slipping inside of a large cabinet, Nick tried not to think about what it could have been used for and closed the double doors behind him, peering out through the crack between them.  _Now,_ this _is a good hiding spot. I'd like to see Shere Khan and Balto try to top it._

While picturing the looks on their faces when he caught the "mystery arsonist" they'd been chasing for weeks, Nick's tail swished side to side in excitement. Not enough to disturb the brace, but enough that he felt the tip brush up against something. He wouldn't have paid it any mind, given that he was surrounded by supplies, if it didn't feel so out-of-place with everything else. How many restaurants kept little glass vials in their storage?

He turned around in the cramped space to look at the object.

How many restaurants kept little glass vials attached to a blasting cap attached to...a car lock?

Nick ignored the strange sight of the metallic locking mechanism in favor of the much more worrying component. He didn't know much about this kind of thing, wasn't really his style, but he was fairly certain he was looking at some kind of bomb.

"...He works fast." That was the first thing he said.

The second was a loud, panicked scream, as he burst out of the cabinet and rushed for the door, not caring about anything he stepped in anymore. "Delgato! Fangmeyer! We have to get out of-!"

That was when the explosions started.

* * *

_Parking Garage_

_3: 56 PM_

It took nearly an hour more for Grizzoli's team to get to their destination after their little "detour". The large bear moved as quickly as he could to remove the patrol car from the marsh and even toed the line between the proper speed limit to get to the parking garage at a fast pace. But it was not to be.

"We're too late," Judy said softly, looking at what was left of their suspected target, now a confirmed one.

The parking garage itself was still standing, so at least the vandalism hadn't been  _that_ extreme. However, any chance of someone finding a usable vehicle inside had literally gone up in smoke. Every car in sight was a scorched wreck, though many were clearly nonfunctional to begin with. There were multiple tools and vehicle parts strewn haphazardly around the floor, making the garage's intended purpose completely impractical even without the fire damage.

It was a very recent job, judging by the smoke still lingering in the air, but the actual fire had already put itself out. Whether that was deliberate or not, Judy wasn't sure. "Something very fishy was going on around this place," she observed, surveying the scene. "I'm still not entirely used to the big city, but I know for a fact this is  _not_ what a parking garage looks like."

"I think you mean  _looked_ like," Grizzoli corrected. "But you're right. This place looks like more of a chop shop."

"A what?" Jimmy asked curiously. He  _was_ used to the big city, but not this darker side of it.

"A place where criminals take stolen vehicles to disassemble them, then sell the separate parts for profit," Judy recited, surprising even herself. "Oh...guess I  _do_ know what this is."

"Oh yeah, now I remember that term from the textbooks," Jimmy affirmed, nodding in satisfaction.

"Another example of why book smarts will never top actual experience," Grizzoli said, shaking his head. Judy looked down at the tools laying around her, reluctantly admitting that she was still very much a rookie herself.

"In any case, this is just another criminal operation our arsonist has targeted. I just can't figure it out. Is he suddenly going vigilante or what?" Judy kept her mouth shut, trying to ignore the irony. It seemed Nick's street experience topped all else.

"What's that smell?" Jimmy asked, his canine nose picking up something other than smoke.

"It's skunk spray," Grizzoli admitted. "Our perp likes to stink up a target to get rid of any unwanted interference before he torches it. It's like his weird trademark. You'd think someone would've caught the guy in the act by now, but he's a slippery one, I'll give him that."

 _And against wolves, it's no wonder this stuff sent them running._ Judy couldn't keep this a secret anymore. Not after Grizzoli had freely shared so much with them. "Actually...I think I might have an idea what-"

Her ears shot up.

"You were saying?" Grizzoli pressed.

"Hold that thought. I think we have company."

Grizzoli instantly went on alert. Another thing he had learned from experience was to never doubt Judy's hearing. To Jimmy's credit, he picked up on it quickly, shoving Wallace deeper into his pocket in a protective gesture.

It didn't take long for them to hear it too. After all, the sound of a dozen motorcycles rapidly approaching was pretty hard to miss. "Who is that?" Grizzoli asked cautiously, a paw already reaching for his tranq gun. Judy and Jimmy already had a pretty good idea, and they shared a nervous glance as the sound grew closer. Knowing they would be boxed in if they stayed inside the garage, the three officers quickly rushed outside, hoping to make it back to the patrol car.

They only made it half the distance before the bikes drove in, a pair of wolves cutting them off instantly. "Now where do ya think  _you're_ goin'?" one of them asked, smiling cruelly. The rest of the pack were quick to follow, coming in and circling the group in a show of natural hunting instinct.

These were clearly the same wolves from the image on Lang's police file and they were even more unpleasant in person. Sporting dirty biker gear and fur that clearly hadn't been given a proper grooming in quite some time, these wolves were the very image of uncivil. Adding to this unfortunate picture was the constant laughs and jeers that rose from the crowd as it surrounded them.

"Well, well, well, now what have we got here?" The apparent leader of the group drove up closer, leering at the officers. He wore tattered jeans and a green and black motocross jacket, marked with the distinct crescent moon insignia of the Lang Family. His bike carried the same coloration, though its distinction was vastly overshadowed by the giant chainsaws attached to either side. The other wolves had rides of a similar caliber, customized with only slightly less vicious weapons like power drills and sledgehammers.

The lead wolf rolled a toothpick around in his jaws, which given his clear lack of interest in hygiene, probably only served to make him look intimidating. "Looks like the ZPD finally decided ta up an' show its face. Sure took ya long enough!" Judy winced. He had a hick accent that made Gideon Grey sound downright pompous.

He looked above her head, seeing the remains of the chop-shop behind them. "But not quick  _enough!_  Now we done lost us another one! Boy, that riles me up more than a bull wearin' a red blindfold! GrrrrrrRRRRRrrrrrRRRRRRrrrrrRRRRRR!" He growled loudly, the sound distinctly like that of a revving motor.

"Watch yer blood pressure, Junior!" another wolf called out in concern.

"Butt out, Billy! I don't need ya remindin' me about ma stinkin' blood pressure!" He said all of this in about two seconds.

"Junior, was it?" Judy asked, slowly stepping towards him. "I'm sorry you lost your...shop," she said, trying to be diplomatic, "but we really are trying to help put a stop to this. So if there's anything you know about-"

"About  _what_ , little lady?" Junior crouched down until he was eye level with her. "About our business? About our... _finances?_ " He spat his toothpick into her face. She tried not to react. "Or is this about our momma? Yeah, ev'ryone's been lookin' for  _her_ , am I right?"

Jimmy piped in cheerfully. "Actually, yeah, we  _were_  hoping we could speak with her! Could you help us out?" Judy's jaw dropped and even Grizzoli, who didn't fully understand the situation, put a paw to his face.

The bunny was getting even more flashbacks about Mr. Big, namely her not-so-smart attempt to threaten him for info. Somehow, Jimmy's lack of malice made it even worse. A rookie mistake indeed.  _Oh sweet cheese and crackers, WHY?!_

Junior reared his head back and laughed, soon joined by the rest of the bikers. The laughter rang loud through the canopy, almost moving the leaves with the force of its might. The three officers looked between each other anxiously, already trying to come up with a way to get out of this mess.

Finally, the wolves calmed down and Junior wiped a tear from his eye. "Ya think we're just gonna bring you to see Momma? That's dumber than shootin' the broad side of a barn just ta prove ya can!" They soon became aware of several loud whirring sounds as the wolves started revving up their bikes, their attached weapons becoming even more threatening in motion. "Oh, we'll help ya all right! Help ya right into tha next life!"

"If anyone's got a plan, now would be a good time for it," Grizzoli whispered down at them urgently. Large as he was, even the polar bear didn't favor their chances. With Jimmy on the verge of panicking, it was up to Judy to think of something. Unfortunately, being surrounded by wolves was one of nature's signature death traps and their technological advancements weren't helping matters.

_Wolves...that's it!_

"I have an idea," she said suddenly. "On the count of three, everyone howl."

"Have you lost your mind, Hopps? How is that gonna-?"

"Just trust me on this!" she insisted. Jimmy nodded while Grizzoli shrugged, figuring he had nothing to lose.

"HOOWEE, this is gonna be a real show!" Junior yelled, cackling to himself as his twin chainsaws kicked on.

"1...2...3!"

At Judy's signal, the three officers all put their heads to the sky and let out a loud, bellowing howl. The sound was loud enough to outshine even the wolves and their bikes, sweeping across the entire pack. One by one, their bikes went quiet, the motorized weapons coming to a stop. They soon heard nothing at all coming from the wolves.

Especially not howling.

Judy was the first to notice and stopped. Jimmy noticed her vocal departure and quieted down as well. They both had to get Grizzoli's attention to stop him, the bear getting too into the moment for his own good. Slightly embarrassed, Grizzoli crossed his arms. "Well, that was therapeutic, but I don't see how it helped us."

"That...didn't do anything!" Judy gasped, horrified.

"Sure it did!" Jimmy corrected, pointing to the wolves. "They look  _way_ more pissed now!"

"We got sick a' folks tryin' to use our instincts against us," Junior growled darkly. "Momma trained it out of us." He and the other wolves revved their bikes up again, even louder than before. "But for  _that_  little stunt, we're gonna tear into ya like lunch hour at Burger Alpha! GrrrrrRRRRRrrrrrrRRRRRRR!"

With one last whir of their engines, the biker wolves sped towards them.

* * *

_Burger Alpha_

_3: 42 PM_

Nick never made it back to the serving area.

The explosion threw him off his feet and into a puddle of a substance he'd rather not identify. Hardly concerned with that at the moment, he quickly scrambled back up and headed for the door, only for a second explosion to sound from the other end. The shaking caused a falling metal beam to oh-so-conveniently bar his path. "Oh, come on! That kind of shit actually happens in real life?!"

Hearing a low crackling sound behind him, Nick suddenly realized that the kitchen was slowly being engulfed in flames. He was lucky the fire bomb had only singed the tip of his tail with how close he'd made that. A few seconds later and Burger Alpha would've had Fried Fox on the menu. (At a different location, of course.)

He wrapped his paws around the beam, trying to pry it away. "Guys! Guys, can you hear me?! Are you okay?!"

"Nick?!" Fangmeyer shouted from the other side. "Delgato's down! We need to get him out of here!"

"Great plan, but first we need to get  _us_ out of here!"

He could barely hear anything over the crackling of the fires and his own grunts of exertion, but he was faintly aware of more frantic thumping coming from the other side. "I can't! The front door's stuck! This kind of shit actually happens in real life?!"

"I know right?!"

Suddenly, he heard another noise. A massive crash sounded from the other side, followed by a shout of, "GET IN!"

It was Carla's voice. It didn't take Nick long to piece it together and come to the conclusion that she had just plowed the monster truck straight through the front wall of the building. Which was really badass and all, except he wasn't  _in_ that part of the building anymore.  _Nice hiding spot, Slick Nick. You've gone and outsmarted yourself yet again._

As he continued trying to pry away the beam, the heat finally got to the metal surface and burned his paws, forcing him to yank them away. The fox blew on them frantically, trying to get his tricky fingers back in business before the rest of him got burned with them.

This was, in Nick's humble opinion, complete BS. He hadn't just gotten out of  _one_ near-death experience only to fall straight into another. He couldn't afford to wait for help of his own; he needed to get the hell out of here.

He turned around, afraid of what he would see.

By now, the fire had spread significantly, now covering most of the floor and countertops. His only chance of escape now was the restaurant's back door, but there was a veritable sea of fire between him and it.

He coughed, the smoke starting to cloud the room. No time for doubt. If he was going to make a move, he needed to do it  _now!_

Trying to keep his wits about him, Nick made a run for it. A stream of fire lay directly in his path, forcing him to make a jump onto one of the few safe parts of the central countertop. It didn't remain safe for long, and he quickly had to roll across to the other side to avoid the closing flames

As he touched ground again, he became aware that he hadn't  _quite_ made it through unscathed. Quickly grabbing ahold of his already hurting tail, Nick patted it down to smother the flames, trying to ignore the pain. He made it brief, as the inferno continued to close in on him like the fires of Hell itself were trying to enact repentance for his sins. Or maybe he was just thinking too deeply into this because what else did you do when you were at serious risk of dying yet again?!

Nick stepped back instinctively as another jet of fire shot out at him, and screamed as his foot came down directly into a patch of hot liquid. Through a combination of adrenaline and just not caring anymore, Nick forced himself to jump through the remaining set of flames blocking his way, immediately falling to the ground and rolling once or twice in an attempt to follow the basic safety procedures he'd learned back when he was still in school.

Real fire didn't have the patience to wait for him to finish though and he got back up, seething in pain from his burnt foot, before practically throwing himself through the back door.

As he landed on the cold ground outside and felt the rain pouring on his body, the relief was instantaneous. Nick gasped for breath, fresh air filling his scorched lungs again. "...Thanks for the less dangerous case, chief...really appreciate it."

If he was well enough to snark, he was well enough to move. As much as he just wanted to lay there for a while, he had to make sure the others had gotten out safely. With some difficulty, Nick managed to get up again and open his eyes, seeing the expanse of rainforest sprawled out in front of him.

And something else.

The other mammal didn't even seem to notice him. Dressed in heavy brown overalls, a black undershirt, and work boots, the creature's head was tilted upwards, gazing almost longingly at the fire that consumed Burger Alpha. It was hard to tell for sure, as it wore a green gas mask that obscured its face completely. Its species was no mystery though, as the bushy black tail with white stripes was a dead giveaway. "So you  _are_ a skunk."

The skunk jumped slightly, only just picking up on Nick's presence. He heard a faint beeping sound as he did, but disregarded it. That wasn't what caught his attention right now, as it seemed he had just caught the "mystery arsonist" red-pawed.

Speaking of, his clothing and species weren't the only clues either. Looking more closely, Nick could see that the skunk's paws were almost completely bald, likely the result of many, many burns. Why he didn't just wear gloves, he wasn't sure. Maybe he liked the feeling, or lack thereof. Incidentally, the tip of his tail was also bald, though that one was probably an accident. Even more incriminating was the fact that he happened to be holding what looked a lot like a key fob, the perfect tool to detonate some car lock fire bombs.

Finally, the arsonist locked eyes with him, and though he couldn't see his face, Nick had a feeling he had just spooked the hell out of him. "What?! NO! That was supposed to be empty! What are you doing doing doing here?!" The skunk's head twitched in time with the repeated word, causing Nick to feel pretty unnerved himself.

"What are you, malfunctioning?"

"Don't call me that!" the skunk screamed, clutching his head. "The doctors always said that! Malfunctioning, delusional, deranged! They don't understand stand stand!"

Nick heard the faint beep again and looked for the source. It was hard to tell with his clouded vision, but he could just make out something thick wrapped around the skunk's neck. As he looked closer, he saw a small yellow light flicker off.  _It can't be…_

If he was really looking at what he thought he was, this arsonist was even more dangerous than he thought. Only the most unstable of criminals had to wear  _those_ anymore.

But it also meant that he had a plan to deal with this guy. Raising his paws high above his head, Nick put on his best spooky voice. " _I am the ghost of Nick Wilde! You killed me! YOU KILLED ME!"_

It worked even better than he expected. The skunk reeled back and screamed bloody murder. "No! NO! I'm sorry! I'm sorry sorry sor-AHHHHHHHH!" With a louder beep, the skunk's tame collar activated, sending a powerful electric shock through his body. Who needed a taser when the perp wore one himself? Nick felt a little bad about taking advantage of what was once a predator's worst nightmare, but he was too stressed right now to put much thought into the matter. He shot forward and lunged right for the arsonist, aiming to pin him down and cuff him while he was distracted.

It was a solid plan, but there were three important factors he failed to take into account:

1.) Someone wearing a tame collar was probably more than used to receiving these shocks regularly.

2.) Especially when that someone happened to be as much of a basket case as this guy.

3.) Frightening a skunk was  _never_ a good idea, ever.

Needless to say, the arsonist recovered much faster than he expected and, acting on base defensive instinct, reacted to the attacking fox by immediately whirling around and showing him a lifted tail, a noticeable hole in the back of his pants. Even after almost being mauled to death a week ago, and almost burning to death just a few minutes ago, somehow this sight filled Nick with a greater primal fear than anything he had ever experienced.

He let out a pitiful whimper. "Oh god no."

The next thing he knew, he was on the ground again, rolling around and clutching his nose. Tears streamed from his eyes and sounds emerged from his throat that he hadn't made since he was a cub. Nick Wilde knew suffering like no other, beginning to think that perhaps death wouldn't have been so bad after all. The worst part was that this was probably long-overdue karma for the poor skunk who had made more money as a rug than a mammal.

At some point during this sensory trauma, Nick became aware that the arsonist had booked it. And that he was on the verge of passing out again, which was frankly a mercy at this point.

He didn't bother trying to stay conscious. All he heard was muffled shouts in the distance, the crackling of fire, and the sound of flapping wings, before he allowed himself a well-deserved rest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Damn, was that long enough? Somehow these chapters just keep getting bigger and bigger. We're gonna end up with a 10k one at this rate.
> 
> Yes, Wallace has become the team pet. I like to imagine his imitation voice as Mickey Mouse.
> 
> Junior belongs to Mind Jack, with his design taking some inspiration from a certain video game that you might recognize. The arsonist skunk also belongs to him, but we'll get more into that later.
> 
> We assume most Zootopia fans who are nerdy enough to read fanfiction are also nerdy enough to recognize what tame collars are. If you don't, I suggest you look it up because it would take several paragraphs to do the explanation justice. In short, it's from a time when Zootopia was a very different (and in our shared opinion, much less interesting) movie. But we like to imagine they're still around in some fashion. It just makes too much sense that they were once a thing in this society.


	12. Dogs on Hogs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heh, it appears the tame collar thing really threw some of you for a loop. Probably the most "controversial" thing we've written in so far. But not to worry, it'll all be explained.
> 
> Eventually.
> 
> For now, more wolves and shit.

****

**Chapter 12: Dogs on Hogs**

_Rainforest District_

_Former Parking Garage_

_4: 05 PM_

As a member of a prey species, Judy was the first to respond to the attack. Junior came charging at her, veering to the right at the last second in the hopes of cutting her in two with one of his attached chainsaws. Short as she was, she almost dodged just by standing still, but then noticed that her ears were up in alert and quickly yanked them down as the saw soared over her head.

Two more wolves came for Grizzoli, assuming he would be the most dangerous adversary. The polar bear, foregoing the tranq gun he had originally prepared, charged an oncoming wolf and plowed a white fist into his muzzle. The wolf was thrown off of his bike, which continued forward a bit on its own before toppling to the ground. The other wolf turned on the spot to charge him again, a giant drill on the front of his bike gearing up for action. Not agile enough to dodge this one, Grizzoli planted both feet in the ground and caught the bike by its handles, the drill inches away from his gut. As the wolf growled and attempted to run him down, Grizzoli was pushed back, his footclaws digging into the ground for traction, until he finally threw the whole bike into another of its fellows, both wolves going down for the count.

Judy whipped out her tranq gun and readied it for action when a high-pitched yell caught her attention. Another wolf raced past, this one holding a long chain, wrapped around the ankle of Jimmy Frost. The arctic fox kept screaming as he was dragged along the ground, though it sounded more excited than fearful.

"Jimmy, catch!" Without thinking, Judy immediately tossed the gun to him. Despite his predicament, he caught it and fired at the wolf dragging him, finally freeing himself.

"Owww, that smarts," he said, getting up and dusting himself off. His ears perked up as a loud whirring sounded directly behind him. A larger wolf with a grey jacket and a built-in buzzsaw on his bike grinned at him viciously.

Jimmy yelped and backed away as the wolf came towards him, tripping and dropping his newfound weapon. "Just a little whelp after all. Almost feel bad about flattenin' ya." He revved up the saw. "Almost."

"Jimmy!" Judy shouted, about to race after him.

But as the wolf charged, he suddenly found something small, white and furry flung into his face. "GAH! Git it offa me! GIT IT OFF!"

Unable to remove the vicious Wallabeanie, the wolf crashed, flinging the plush into the air as he did. Jimmy reached up and caught it easily. "Good job, Wallace!"

" _Let's kick some ass, Jimmy!"_

"Kick 'butt', don't be rude."

Judy sighed in relief, but quickly came to the realization that she had just disarmed herself. Seeing Grizzoli punch out another wolf, Judy sidled up beside him. "Uh...if you're not using that gun…"

"My gun is bigger than your head."

She smiled sweetly, cupping her paws and widening her purple eyes at him. "Pleeeease?"

He grunted and dropped the weapon into Judy's paws. "Knock yourself out."

"Thanks!" She pointed the over-sized weapon into the crowd with only slight difficulty. "Now who wants nappy-time first?!"

These wolves clearly weren't the sharpest tools in the shed (they only stole them), and thus weren't smart enough to take Judy's threat seriously. A grave mistake.

The first wolf didn't even get close enough to strike. The bunny shot a dart straight into his neck, making him veer off course and miss her completely, then run straight into Grizzoli, who backpawed the semi-unconscious wolf into complete unconsciousness.

The second wolf only did slightly better, getting close enough to force her to jump out of the way of his attached sledgehammer. Before he could turn around for another go, the bunny landed on her feet and shot a dart right into his hindquarters. The unfortunate wolf yelped, then fell to the ground, his butt sticking straight up for all to see Judy's handiwork. The bunny blew on the end of her gun smugly.

"I think you might be enjoying this a little too much," Grizzoli remarked.

"What are you talking about? This is strictly professional," Judy replied, grinning at him while twirling the gun in her paws. A third wolf made a go for her, making her raise an arm and shoot him off his bike without looking, or even changing her expression.

"...Can I have my gun back now?"

Riding around the perimeter of all this chaos, Junior watched as his pack was given significantly more resistance than anticipated. "How is this happenin'? It's three o' them ag'nst…" He tried to count the remaining wolves. "...more than three."

The answer to his question was that it was three trained officers of the law against a bunch of dumb hick stereotypes barely even taking it seriously, but that didn't much matter to him anymore. He suddenly veered to the right as a dart went whizzing past his head. "Yipe!"

"Give it up, Junior. We can still settle this peacefully," said Judy, her gun trained on the moving target.

"Peace? Oh, I'll give ya a piece of  _me!_ " Junior whirled his bike around and attacked. For someone the bunny had pegged as, to put it nicely, dumb as bricks, he had at least learned from the mistakes of his packmates. Swerving left and right to keep her from getting a clear shot, Junior leaned to the left and swept at her with a chainsaw, low enough to make a clean cut this time. Judy raised her gun, but realized too late that he was too close to take a shot.

With a loud clunk, Junior passed by, looking back to see what was left of the uppity bunny cop. To his confusion, he saw her large tranq gun dropped on the ground, but nothing else.

"You're under arrest!"

"What in tarnation?!" Junior gaped in astonishment as Judy had not only dodged the saw, she was now  _standing on top of it_ , her feet planted safely on the guide bar. "You ain't normal!"

"I'll take  _that_ as a compliment." Pivoting on one foot, she kicked Junior across the muzzle with the other one, again and again. She had to admit, a small part of her left over from kithood was really enjoying getting to kick the snot out of a canine hillbilly.

"Enough o' this!" Junior took one paw off the handlebar to swipe his claws at her. With the kind of dexterity only a bunny could pull off, Judy jumped clear over his head, landed on the  _other_ saw with both paws, and thrust her feet back into his face. "Aggh!"

As the bike started getting too out of control even for her, Judy leapt back to the ground while Junior struggled to reorient himself. The wolf finally gained control again and panted heavily, his face covered in bruising. He rubbed a paw against his bloody nose, in complete disbelief. "Dang! She's scarier than a momma bear with six cubs in a pizza place parkin' lot!"

Judy just stared back at him, narrowing her eyes warningly.

Realizing he was being intimidated by a bunny, Junior shook his head violently, snapping himself out of it. "Oh, you are gonna git it now!" He clenched his paws around the handlebars, preparing for another assault. "GrrrrrRRRRrrrrRRRrrrrRRRRRRR-"

_"Enough!"_

It was as if time itself froze. Not only Junior, but every wolf in the vicinity suddenly ceased their attack, looking anxiously in the direction of the voice.

Judy followed their gaze and instantly saw why. Riding in on a black bike, that somehow looked more menacing than the others despite its lack of weaponry, was the single largest wolf she had ever seen. This guy was all muscles, wearing a dark blue collared shirt with black jeans and footwraps. His gaze was calm, but unmistakably threatening.

Junior gulped. "Oh, h-hey, Felix."

"What do you imbeciles think you're doing?" he asked slowly.

"Y-Ya mean this?" Junior looked in the direction of the strewn bikes and bodies behind him. "Nothin' much, really. We were just, uh, havin' a little fun."

Felix closed his eyes in a visible effort to remain calm. "Need I remind you that we have enough problems already without you picking a fight with the ZPD?"

At that, Junior suddenly got some wind back in his sails. "Hey, now! It's their fault for ignorin' us all this time! All we get is a few patrol cars passin' through, and the police force around  _here_  ain't even botherin'! I just lost ma shop because they don't give a damn!"

Felix rolled his eyes. "Yes, I can't imagine why the police would turn a blind eye to the plights of a crime family." His gaze turned to Judy and the bunny stiffened. If things got ugly, she felt a lot less confident about her ability to take on  _this_ wolf. "You there, what do you know about this?"

She glanced back at Jimmy and Grizzoli, who shrugged at her in response. She wanted to warn these guys anyway and now it seemed the opportunity had presented itself. Taking a deep breath, Judy went into a long explanation about the true intent behind the arson attacks, the assimilation of the other crime gangs, and the ones masterminding it. By the time she was finished, she had practically winded herself. "It's not much to go on, but that's what we know."

"We do?" asked Grizzoli. Judy winced, forgetting that she had never gotten to tell him this.

She looked up at Felix, waiting for a response. The large wolf's expression was unreadable, and it felt like an eternity before he answered her. "That's it?"

If she didn't know better, Judy would have questioned if she heard that right. "You...you knew all of that already?"

He scoffed. "Not all of us are as intellectually-challenged as Felix Jr. here." The smaller wolf was currently in the middle of trying to dig something out of his toes, tuning out the conversation. "We recognized the pattern in these attacks almost instantly; we just haven't been fast enough to respond."

"Wait, you're  _both_ named Felix?" asked Jimmy. Wallace's head fell to one side.

Felix growled in frustration, clearly having gotten this question far too often. "Yes. Don't ask why. Let's just say our parents' smarts went to Junior."

Said wolf finally withdrew a piece of gunk, sniffed at it, and flicked it away. "Sorry, what were y'all sayin?"

"What I'm saying," Felix answered patiently, "is that we're done here. Let's go!"

The bikers didn't need to be told twice. The ones that were conscious hefted up the ones that weren't and took off in droves, speeding away into the forest. "Wait!" Judy shouted. "We can help! We're after the same enemy here!"

"This is Lang Family business, and we will take care of it ourselves," Felix said simply, turning his bike around. "If you know what's good for you, you'll stay out of our way." With that warning, Felix drove off to join his pack, disappearing into the trees. Junior gave a mocking laugh before he left as well.

Now it was just the three cops, their patrol car, and a bunch of abandoned bikes left behind. Jimmy smiled. "That went well."

"AGGGGGGGH!" Judy screamed in frustration, pulling her ears down over her head.

"Or...not?"

"How long is this going to go on before we make some actual progress?!" Judy paced back and forth, tapping her feet in an entirely different way. "Simon...gets away! Lucy Sang...gets away! Crazy biker gang...GETS! AWAY! Just for once can we catch a break here?!"

A sudden banging came from the direction of the patrol car. "I don't know about a break, but we caught  _something_ ," Grizzoli said, pointing a thumb towards the car's backseat. Pounding against the window was a wolf with a grey jacket, the one who had been heroically taken down by Wallace.

"Guys! Where didja go?!" the wolf shouted frantically. "Don't just leave me here!"

"Figured if they were going to give us that much crap, we could at least arrest  _one_ of them," Grizzoli said. "And for the record, yes, I read him his rights first."

He suddenly found the rabbit wrapped around his ankle, hugging him profusely as her tail wiggled in glee. "Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!"

"Please don't make me regret this decision."

* * *

_Ex-Burger Alpha_

_4: 26 PM_

Nick was almost disappointed that he didn't wake up in a hospital bed.

It certainly would have been more comfortable than being sprawled out on the backseat without even the luxury of a blanket. Not like they  _had_ blankets, but still!

He could see that his uniform was an absolute mess by this point. Getting tossed around a filthy fast-food restaurant and then falling onto the wet ground probably contributed to that. His fur still wasn't dry either, and it wasn't going to get much dryer out here in the Rainforest District. He could also see that his left foot was wrapped up in a bandage, as was the tip of his tail. Compared to the rest of his bandage collection, that didn't particularly impress him.

"Damn, I'm a wreck. What's the damage, guys?" he asked wearily. Logic dictated that if he was in the patrol car, someone else must have been in here too.

But since when had logic ever helped him? "...Hello? Hellooooo? Poor helpless fox looking for some TLC!"

He got no response. "Seriously, what the heck?" Straining himself to get up, Nick peered into the front of the van. No one. "They ditched me. They actually ditched me."

Seeing flashing lights from outside, Nick figured he might as well get some answers the old fashioned way. He put a paw on the door and tried to open it, only to find himself locked in. "Come on, you can at least not treat me like a prisoner!"

A knocking on the window caught his attention, and he reeled back at the sight of Carla Hyenandez. "Never thought I'd be happy to see you, Chortles _._ Now can you let me out?"

"No."

"Excuse me?"

She crossed her arms. "Can't let you out. Sorry."

"You're not sorry at all, but can you at least tell me why?"

"Take a deep breath. Through your nose."

"Whatever. If finding my center will satisfy you…" Nick did what she said, and almost immediately fell onto his back screaming. "AGGGH! WHAT IS THAT  _STENCH?!"_

"That's you."

"HOW IS THAT ME?!"

"I guess you went nose-blind to it, huh?" She tapped on the glass, obviously enjoying this. "Did you forget about getting skunked?"

"I THOUGHT IT WAS A HORRIBLE DREAM!"

"Well, it wasn't. Don't know how you got that much skunk spray all over you, but that plus the rainfall made you pretty much stink  _a la muerte_ , so we threw you in here while the ZPD got everything cleaned up. Aside from that, not much to report I'm afraid. The paramedics just arrived-"

"MY NOSE IS DYING!"

"-and looked you over. Be thankful they even got close enough to take care of your injuries. Delgato didn't get off so lucky. Guy's got some pretty serious burns, but he should be alright. Hmm. Delgato. Delgato…" She put a claw to her chin. "I just thought of it, but do you know if he comes from New Mexicow by any chance?"

"THIS IS POLICE BRUTALITY!"

"Guess not. I'll have to ask Fangmeyer. Anyway, we're about to head out now."

"I'M GONNA-wait, you're gonna what?" Nick sat back up, immediately seeing an unamused Carla. (Also known as typical Carla.)

"We got a spare car so we don't have to smell you." Without warning, she opened the door and flung a set of keys into Nick's face before quickly shutting it again.

"So you're basically making me drive a quarantine bubble," he said flatly.

"Didn't you  _want_ your car back?" she asked, turning and walking away without waiting for a response, at least having the decency to leave the door open behind her.

"Hey, you've gotten irony down pat! Just a little further and we can work on puns!" Nick called after her, bitterly getting out of the backseat of the car, climbing around front, and letting himself back in again.

He found a crackling police radio waiting for him. " _Wilde! Wilde, are you okay? Say something!"_

Nick was almost tempted to rip it from the dashboard, but reluctantly picked it up. "What's the magic word?"

" _Nick! I-"_

"Wrong." He released the button and put it back down, waiting for Fangmeyer to try again.

"Please _pick up the radio!"_

He answered it again. "Fine, but only because I don't want to listen to the wolf whine channel. Now, what is it?" If he were feeling more patient, he would've given him the runaround at least 2-3 more times first.

" _We already checked out the building and, uh, yourself, but we need a report on what happened. How did you get...like that?"_

"Oh, nothing major. I just had a run-in with a skunk. Happens to the best of us."

" _Yeah, we know you got skunked, but how did, wait, you mean you actually_ saw _the guy?!"_

"Saw him, spooked him, got sprayed by him. And before you say anything, yes, he was an actual skunk. You were right, I was wrong. Enjoy that feeling of accomplishment while you can."

Fangmeyer didn't even seem to care. The nerve of him. " _Okay, I've got a notepad. Describe the perp for me as best you can."_

Nick found that he made a pretty good police witness after all. Perhaps it was because he had left such an "impression" on him, but he was able to describe the arsonist down to the last detail.

The last detail gave Fangmeyer pause. " _I'm sorry, what was that? Did you just say...a tame collar?"_

There was notable apprehension in his tone. For most predators, the words "tame collar" triggered immediate chills, even though almost nobody in this day and age had ever actually worn one. They came from a time when Zootopia was a very different city, one that didn't even  _try_ to pretend that "Anyone can be anything." He had a feeling Judy knew nothing about them, and he wasn't about to tell her either. Even back before he really knew her, and wanted to break that naive, peppy spirit of hers, that subject was too taboo to breach.

Nick swallowed a lump in his throat. "...Yeah. We'll have to check the database for any skunks committed within the last few years. That collar was no fluke. This guy was a  _real_ nutcase."

" _Alright. Will do. Good work, Wilde."_

Nick looked up through the windshield, seeing the spare patrol car sitting a few feet in front of him. Fangmeyer caught his stare and gave him a thumbs up, Carla sitting cross-armed in the seat next to him. " _Sorry about the accommodations, but I have to drive the car...and I need both paws for that...and I have an extremely sensitive nose...I can still smell you from here actually-"_

"Quit while you're behind, Whitewash."

" _Right. We're going to head back to the station to report in. You coming with us?"_

Nick had literally no desire at all to return to the station in the condition he was in. "Yeah, actually, I was thinking of finding a good bar and trying to forget all of this ever happened."

He saw the wolf's ears perk up in surprise. " _...Sure, I guess that's alright. You've certainly earned the rest of the day off. We'll tell Bogo about the incident then, while you go get drunk as a sk-"_

Nick drove off without another word.

* * *

_Grizzoli's Patrol Car_

_4: 38 PM_

Grizzoli hung the radio back on its stand, even less cheerful than usual after this latest update. If the fact that Delgato's squad had also lost their target was supposed to make him feel better, it didn't. Especially not with the tiger himself out of commission for the time being.

"Poor Nick…" Judy said glumly. "I guess neither of us can catch a break."

"Where are we going now?" Jimmy asked. "Back to the station to process this guy?"

"That's the plan," Grizzoli answered, glancing back at their prisoner quizzically. As he now occupied the back of the car by himself, Judy and Jimmy (and Wallace) were forced to share shotgun. The latter shifted around uncomfortable, but the former was already used to fox/bunny seating arrangements. "We'll take him back, fill out the paperwork, then in a few hours, we can get an interrogation going-"

"We can't wait that long!" Judy said urgently.

"Excuse me?"

"We have to find Lang  _fast_ , or else…"

Jimmy heard a sudden chime in his pocket, and maneuvered around a bit to pull out his phone, seeing that he had gotten a text message from a familiar number.

" _hy there, kid."_

"Oh. Right. The big crime lord conspiracy you forgot to mention," said Grizzoli.

Judy looked away guiltily. "I'm sorry. I know I should have brought it up sooner, but the chief was kind of against us investigating it anymore."

Jimmy typed out a reply. " _Hey, Nick. Are you okay? I heard things went rough for you."_

" _jst a bit of a hiccup. Nuttin 2 srs"_

" _I heard ya got skunked. :P"_

" _Damn it, Fangmeyer!"_

Grizzoli glanced at Judy waringly. "So it's just a coincidence that this arsonist case happened to align with the crime lord one."

"Yeah."

He pinched his brow and muttered something along the lines of, " _Weeks! We spent freaking weeks, and they just come in and stumble upon…"_ She assumed she wasn't meant to hear it.

Jimmy glanced over at her, then back to his phone. " _Shouldn't you be talking to Judy about this?"_

" _Iz ^s my trainee? No, no she isn't."_

" _I thought chief said we weren't supposed to talk much on this mission."_

" _SCREW WOT CHIEF SAYS! IT'S JST TEXTING!"_

"You know, if this was anyone besides you and Wilde, I wouldn't believe it," Grizzoli said aloud. "But rules are rules. I'm heading back to the station."

Judy certainly couldn't blame him for that response. But there had to be a way. "...What if we got something out of him  _now?"_

"You mean do the interrogation in a moving police vehicle? That's kind of unorthodox."

"Who do you think you're talking to?"

"Good point."

" _Are you drunk or is this just how you talk over text? XD"_

" _Not drunk yt. Goin 2 fix dat."_

" _0_0"_

" _Of crse Fangmeyer didn't teL u THAT part."_

"Hey, Jimmy, what do you think?" Judy asked, nudging the arctic fox in the shoulder.

"Huh?" He straightened up. "Oh sorry, I was talking to Nick."

"Nick? What's he up to?"

"Going to get drunk apparently."

Judy groaned. "We don't have time for this right now! Let me call him." She quickly dialed Nick's number and put the phone to her ear. She got nothing but ringing. "Annnnnd he's not even picking up. We'll just have to hope he can take care of himself because there's bigger fish to fry."

She climbed over Jimmy to glare through the grid into the backseat. The wolf glared back at her, surprisingly quiet given how rowdy he and his fellows had been before. "I hope ya folks ain't expectin' me to cooperate, or you'll be mighty disappointed."

"What is your problem? Don't you want to help your mother?"

"I'm helpin' her by keeping nosy types like you away!" he snapped. "Go ahead and arrest me! It ain't gonna do ya none."

Jimmy pushed her ears aside and peeked over her head. "What's your name?" he asked, smiling.

He blinked, stunned by the non-aggressive response from a mammal he'd tried to maim. "...Timber."

"Hi, Timber. I'm Officer Frost and this is Officer Hopps. How are you feeling?"

"Haven't you heard what happened to Big and Thornbrush?!" Judy pressed. There was a time and a place for good cop/bad cop, and this wasn't it. "These guys know what they're doing and they won't rest until they've gotten to your mother too!"

"She's done just fine so far! These chumps haven't been able to touch her at all!"

"But she can't hide forever, Timber," Jimmy said gently. "Can you really live with yourself if something happened and you could have prevented it? I mean, if it was me, that would be really sucky-"

Timber suddenly lashed forward and snapped his jaws at the grid, making them both reel back. "Y'all don't know what yer talkin' about! Lady Lang cared for us, _raised_  us, taught us the ways of the pack! She won't go down that easily, you'll see!"

"It's no use," Judy sighed, returning to her original spot. "They're too loyal to Lang. We're not going to get anything at this rate."

"I could've told you that," Grizzoli said bluntly. "You think this is the first time one of Lang's boys got arrested? Hell, I doubt we can even hold on to him for long. Evidence against this kind of thing tends to just...disappear."

"Arresting him was  _your idea!_ "

He shrugged. "Yeah, but it was more for personal gratification than anything. They tried to drill a hole in my gut. That's not okay."

"Ha! That's nothin'!" Timber shouted boastfully. "Ya should see the derby we got goin' on tonight! That's where the  _real_ action is!" Judy and Jimmy looked back and stared at him. "...I shouldn't a' talked about that either, huh?"

"Now leaving: the Rainforest District," Grizzoli announced.

"Actually...I think we have a good enough lead now. Let's go back," said Judy.

With a long sigh, the bear made a U-turn and headed back into the canopy.

"Now entering: the Rainforest District."

* * *

_The Wolf's Den_

_4: 44 PM_

Two wolves padded down the carpeted hallway, one significantly more anxious than the other.

"Momma's not gonna be mad at us, is she?" Junior asked nervously.

"Depends," Felix answered, not looking at him.

"On what?"

"Are you using 'us' in the sense to refer to you and I, or rather yourself in conjunction with your fellow bikers? Because if you are using the former, then I do not think she will be mad at  _us_ , but rather just yourself, in which case you should have instead used the word 'me'. However, if you were intending the latter meaning, then I must concede the strong possibility that she will, in fact, be mad at all of you."

Junior stopped in his tracks, staring blankly at his brother's back, before running to catch up. "Now yer just bein' spiteful!"

"I'm being honest. I don't know  _what_ she'll say, but mother knows best."

Reaching a set of white double-doors at the end of the hallway, Felix pushed them open with one paw and stepped inside with Junior.

It was less like walking into another room and more like walking into another world. The office of Lady Lang was kept in perpetual darkness, of little hindrance to her nocturnal family, but effective at keeping most outsiders from gleaning too much information should they happen to peer inside. The ceiling was speckled with a wide array of stars and constellations, furthering the illusion. Lang's desk itself was seated in front of a large tinted window that took up the entire wall, the perfect view for seeing the moon rise over the district each night.

As the doors closed behind the two wolves, the biggest source of light now came from a flat computer monitor sitting on the desk, facing away from them. A figure sat in a suspiciously-leather chair, paws folded as they watched the screen.

"What I am proposing is an alliance," the figure said. "I do not fear for my safety, but this new organization is proving far too adept at disrupting my operations. My entire livelihood is at stake here. It's only a matter of time before they target your own empire, and should they acquire  _my_ resources as well, you will be hard-pressed to stop them."

" _Alas, señorita, I cannot. My empire, she is a delicate beast, and must be fed always. Always! If I were to lend support to you, I risk losing my own."_

"You are at risk of losing your own anyway. Would you rather be in the red or in the ground?"

" _Your concern is touching, but do not worry for me. It is a delicate beast, but a beast nonetheless. Anyone who tries to prey on me will soon find out who the real predator is. Still, I am moved by your verbal embrace. My heart, she goes out for you and all of your kin. I must sing for you a song of regret."_

"No, no that's really not necessary. I-"

The strum of a violin sounded throughout the darkened room.

" _As the daaaaaaay, turns to niiiiiiiiight!"_

" _I must withdraaaaaw, from this fiiiiiiiight!"_

" _Oh, Lady Laaaaaang, eyes like the mooooooon!"_

" _She makes my heaaaaaart, just want to sw-"_

The feed was abruptly cut. "Never trust a feline."

Felix coughed loudly. "Miss Lang, we have returned."

"Oh, Felix! I didn't hear you come in." From the chair rose a white wolf, her pristine fur greying with age. She wore a blue button-up shirt under a darker blue blazer, while a black skirt extended down to her knees, ending in a pair of high heels. Her claws were painted a dark blue, matching her eyes. A pair of crescent moon-shaped earrings swayed gently from her lobes.

Annemarie "Lady Lang" Luna smiled warmly at her children. "A pleasure to see you both. Now, what can I do for-JUNIOR!"

Before the younger wolf could react, Lang bounded over and grabbed him by the cheeks. "You're hurt! Oh, my poor baby!" She withdrew a small handkerchief and spit into it, washing away the blood.

"Hey, that's not-ah, quit it, Momma!"

"Don't you talk back to me, young mammal! Now hold still and let me clean you up!"

Even Felix was mildly amused by the sight of Lang wrapping Junior into what was essentially a chokehold and grooming his face. "C-Come on, that tickles! Heehee, stop it! Hahahaha!"

Eventually, she did stop, but not before Junior's face was thoroughly covered in wolf slobber. "Feeling better, sweetie?"

"I...I guess."

"Good."

She punched him hard in the face, sending him to the floor. "MORON!"

Junior coughed, putting a paw to his cheek. "M-Momma?"

"How many times do I have to tell you not to attack the cops?! Do you think we need any  _more_ unwanted attention, huh?!"

"I-I-I'm sorry, Momma!"

"You're  _going_ to be sorry!" She stood over him, wagging a finger pointedly. "Because as of now, you're grounded! No more biking for a week!"

"What?!" Junior shifted onto his knees in a pleading gesture. "But the derby's tonight! I can't miss that!"

"You should have thought about that before you disobeyed me. Now, go eat your supper before it gets cold."

"Yes, Momma…" Junior got up and slumped out of the room, tail between his legs.

Felix waited until the doors closed to speak up again. "As much as I support you disciplining my baby brother, I believe there are more important matters to discuss."

"Of course," she said, looking to him sternly. "What do you have to report?"

"Unfortunately, much of the same. Junior just lost his chop-shop and we're down one more Burger Alpha."

"No great loss there."

"More troubling is that the ZPD has finally become aware of the plot against you. I warned them to stay away, but I  _was_  speaking to the notorious Officer Judy Hopps. I somehow doubt she'll listen."

Lang was silent, walking back to put a paw on her desk. "I see. Then we don't have much time until either the ZPD scavenges enough out of this chaos to arrest me, or this 'Count' gets to me first."

"Do not say things like that, Miss Lang!" Felix growled. "I won't let anyone hurt you!"

She smiled at him softly. "Just once, couldn't you call me Mother?"

"If you command me to, Miss Lang."

"Oh nevermind. I don't suppose Hopps told you anything new?"

"I'm afraid not."

She sat back in her chair, turning away to face the window. "Pity. I was at least hoping we could gain more intelligence on our enemy."

"It is a truly baffling situation," Felix admitted. "Especially with Big and Thornbrush also targeted. Even to gain this much power over the criminal underworld, I don't see why anyone would risk so much-"

"No," Lang said firmly. "I told you. There's more to this than just the power. Think of the previous victims. Mr. Big, iced. Damien Thornbrush, flattened with his own decor. This is not a professional job, but a personal one."

"Forgive me, Miss Lang," he said, bowing in submission. "But I must express that I find your theory of revenge killings to be difficult to swallow."

"How so?"

"Well, it's just that each of Zootopia's crime lords controls their own operations, their own domains, almost entirely separate from each other. It's hard to believe that someone could seek revenge against  _all_ of them."

Felix spent a long time just looking at the back of Lang's chair, seeing the end of her bushy tail swish slowly in thought.

"...There is  _one_ mammal who might."

He straightened up. "Miss Lang? You really know someone like that?"

" _Knew,_ " she clarified. "No one's seen hide nor hair of him in a very long time. But if I'm right, then he would not only have the desire to murder all of us, but to take everything we own for himself."

"How could such a mammal exist?" Felix asked, more to himself than her.

"More importantly, I would know who he's  _really_ after."

"...What?"

Lang rose from her seat again. "You mentioned that Judy Hopps was here. Tell me, was her partner, a fox named Nicholas Wilde, also present?"

"I don't believe so, Miss Lang, but I can ask the rest of the pack. If he's in the Rainforest District, someone will have seen him."

"Do that. If he is here, I would like to speak with him."

Felix did a double-take. "I beg your pardon?! You want to bring an outsider  _here?!_ "

"Yes," she said simply, tail swishing faster. "Clearly, this situation is not improving with time. If there's a chance he knows something that can help us, I am willing to take it."

Felix looked to the floor, uncertain. But his decision was already made. "I will do whatever you command, Miss Lang. If you want me to bring him here, so be it."

He perked up, surprised to see the old wolf placing a paw on his shoulder. "You be careful now, Felix. It's dangerous out there. I couldn't bear to lose you or any of your siblings."

"Our lives belong to you, Miss Lang. Nothing else matters."

"At least give your mother a hug."

Even in high heels, she couldn't reach his level, forcing him to bend down on one knee. Lang wrapped her arms tightly around the large wolf's head. "I love you, Felix." He tried to get back up, but found that Lang's grip was much tighter than he thought. "Say it."

"...I love you, Miss Lang."

"Close enough." She planted a tender kiss on his forehead and finally released him. Giving one final bow, Felix left the room to carry out his mission.

Alone once more, Lady Lang walked over to the expansive window and placed a paw upon it. The sky outside was getting darker, but it wasn't quite nighttime yet.

"The moon will be up soon. I wonder...how many more times will I be able to see it?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That enough italic text for you guys? Get used to it. :P
> 
> Felix (Sr.) belongs to Mind Jack. Lady Lang belongs to me. I just wish her office belonged to me too because I'm a total sucker for that kind of decor.
> 
> Boy, text lingo is fun! And by fun, I mean infuriating! The things we do sometimes…
> 
> Since we got some good feedback from our fan polling last time, here's another question for you guys. What voices/voice actors do you picture for each of the characters? We'll post the results next time, including what Mind Jack came up with because I don't really do that actually.


	13. Swingin' in the Rain

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First things first, you've probably noticed our snazzy new cover art. (Unless you're on A03, in which case it's probably been pretty darn noticeable.) That beauty right there comes from the wonderful zooijiness over on Tumblr. As you can tell, she's an amazing artist, so go check out her stuff!
> 
> In this chapter, we have some old faces, some new faces, and one sort-of-new-face-but-not-really.

****

**Chapter 13: Swingin' in the Rain**

_Rainforest District_

_The Rain Barrel_

_5: 10 PM_

It took Nick a while to remember that the Rainforest District didn't  _have_ a good bar. It was one of the reasons he spent so little time at home.

So instead, he settled. He settled  _hard._

The Rain Barrel was called such because of the large, round tree it was built inside of. While technically being two stories tall, the bar itself was located on the bottom level, with the upper one reserved for the proprietors and special guests. Nick knew from experience that those "special guests" were often members of the Lang Family, who used the place as a popular hangout spot. Indeed, he could already see a few of their bikes parked out front. Might as well see if he could make a little headway while he was busy drowning his sorrows.

He pulled into the parking lot and got out of the patrol car, immediately stepping into a puddle. Because he wasn't quite wet enough apparently. "Yup. Drinks are sounding pretty good right now."

Closing the door, he turned around and came muzzle-to-muzzle with Carla. Screaming in surprise, he fell backwards and landed in the puddle again. "Stop doing that!"

The hyena, holding an umbrella in one paw, just stood there and watched him as he got back up. "Aren't police officers supposed to be observant?"

"Oh yeah, I bet you passed  _all_ of those courses back at the academy," he muttered, squeezing water out of his sleeve.

"Do not question my abilities, Wilde!" she snapped, even more fiercely than expected. "You're lucky I bothered to come all the way out here!"

"Why  _did_ you come out here anyway?" He looked over her shoulder. "And where's Fangmeyer?"

"Back at the station, covering your hide. I had to call a cab. They overcharge, by the way."

"Welcome to Zootopia," he said dryly...wetly. "Again, you went through all of this effort because…?"

She grabbed him by the tie and yanked him towards her. "Because I'm supposed to keep an eye on you, jackass! What am I supposed to do if something happens to my 'mentor' while he's out making a fool of himself?!"

"Records room maybe?" She let go, but held a silent glare. "I'm impressed you can stand this close to me, considering the skunk funk I'm giving off."

"Only because I took a page out of Fangmeyer's book," she said, crumpled tissues noticeably sticking out of her nostrils. "Besides, I  _already_ have to hold down my bile when I'm around you."

"Why is it that the only time you can make a joke is when it's insulting me?"

"Who said it was a joke?"

Being the only one getting rained on seemed somehow appropriate now. "I don't suppose you brought an umbrella for  _me?_ "

"It's a thirty foot walk. You've wasted more time complaining than it would take to get there."

Lacking a response that wouldn't prove her point, Nick just gave her a very Carla-esque grunt and headed towards the bar. At least now he had a drinking buddy, using that term as loosely as possible. "So what are you getting? The Rainy Day? Canopy Delight? How about the Tarzan? Apparently, it makes you so drunk that you scream uproariously and I'd buy it for you just to see that."

"I don't drink."

"Course you don't. A Fruitopia then?"

"Quiet."

"It's a girly drink. Just wanted to clarify that on the assumption that it went over your head."

"I said, quiet!" Carla grabbed Nick by the arm just before he could enter the Rain Barrel and yanked him to the ground. Now forced into a squatting position, Nick found himself looking through one of the bar's windows, seeing a room full of patrons inside. Unsurprisingly, most of them were wolves, almost everyone else already cleared out by the pack.

However, there were three others present, and they seemed to be causing quite a stir.

Nick quickly recognized two of the intruders as Fangs and Boomer, despite the fact that he had last seen them lying motionless on the floor of Dream Time. They were fully clothed now, and not even in the kind of cheap gear he would expect from naturalists, but dark black suits that were uncomfortable just to look at.

Fangs seemed to think so too, as the dingo was scratching at it almost perpetually. "Oi! Why's 'e gotta go and stick us in these bloody things? The itchin's worse than ever!" he whined.

"Careful. Count won't appreciate ya ruining one of his suits," Boomer warned, the kangaroo's own suit still equipped with his iconic bowler hat.

"I'm tellin' ya the wanker's doin' this on purpose! This is right torture, it is!" Fangs balanced on one foot while using the other to scratch as well.

"Be grateful you are still alive," a third, much deeper voice intoned. It was easy to pinpoint the source, as it came from the single largest thing in the room by far.

Nick squinted through the window. "Is that...Koslov?"

"He's big," Carla noted, eyes wide.

"No, but you're not the first to make that mistake." The truly massive polar bear known as Koslov was formerly the chief bodyguard and head of security for Mr. Big. If  _he_ had fallen under the Count's influence, it was no wonder the arctic shrew had been so easily dispatched.

"You made very grievous error," Koslov continued, towering over the dingo. "I am surprised the Count did not crush little puppy skull like grapefruit."

"G-Grapefruit?"

Koslov raised his large paws and slammed them together. "Squish."

The dingo made no further complaints.

"I really wish we had Grizzoli here," Nick groaned. "How are we supposed to deal with  _that?_  I don't want  _my_ skull crushed like grapefruit either."

"You know him?" Carla asked.

"From when I used to work for Mr. Big, yeah."

"So you really used to work for a crime lord then?" Carla looked at him with keen interest. "What was that like?"

"Better than living on the streets," he replied shortly, guarded as ever about his past.

Carla gave a small sigh, looking away. "Yeah...you're probably right."

Nick turned his focus back to their new adversaries. "Anyway, we can't just sit here. Especially since I haven't even gotten my drinks yet."

"We can't just barge in there either. We're outnumbered  _and_ outmatched."

"I'm not so sure about that," Nick said, scanning the room again. The Lang Family wolves were getting more and more restless by the moment. "I don't think they'll try anything too aggressive with the Beverly Howlbillies around. This could be our chance to get some answers."

He narrowed his eyes at the suited criminals. "And we are  _long_ overdue."

* * *

_Danger Dan's Destruction Derby of Danger!_

_5: 13 PM_

"So...this is the place?" Judy asked.

It was a rhetorical question. If the rickety wooden sign wasn't a dead giveaway, the rest of the scenery certainly was. The derby that Timber spoke of took place inside of a large circus tent on the edge of the Rainforest District. It had clearly not been used by the circus in quite some time, as the bright and vibrant colors had since faded into a bleached tone and there were large holes in several places. Even from their spot in the patrol car, they could easily make out the sounds of uncontrolled shouting and engine motors from within.

"Sounds like they're already settin' up!" Timber said excitedly, pressing his face to the window. His tail banged against the grid as it wagged. "Ya gotta let me in there! I can't miss tha derby!"

"I don't know…" Judy said. "You  _did_  kind of attack us…"

"Yeah, but he helped us out too," Jimmy argued. "I say let him have his fun! Don't you think, Wallace?"

" _Be freeeeeee!"_

Judy figured that if the guy Timber almost killed was okay with it, she didn't have much room to argue. "Alright. Fair's fair I guess."

"YES!" Timber cheered. "Maybe ya folks ain't so bad after all!"

"But before we do," the bunny said pointedly, "I need your word that you won't just go in there and screw us over."

"Oh, absolutely! Just please, please, pleeeeease let me enter!" Timber pleaded, putting his paws up in canine begging position.

She sighed. "Fine. Grizzoli?"

"What am I, a chauffeur?" Regardless, the polar bear got out of his end and opened the back door for Timber.

"YEE HAW, I am gonna take the gold tonight-urk!" The wolf dashed off for the tent, but was halted abruptly when Grizzoli's paw grabbed the back of his collar.

"Yeah, trust only goes so far, buddy. You're taking us with you."

"Uh...sure, no problem." Grizzoli released the wolf, letting him stumble forward a bit as he tried to regain his footing.

"Can you take us to see Junior?" Judy asked.

"Provided he even shows up. By the sounds a' things, Lady Lang might have had some real choice words for him."

"Right. About her…"

"Ya'll are gonna hafta take that up with him," Timber said quickly. "Only the top dogs around here are allowed to give out that kinda info."

"Fair enough," she conceded.

While she pondered this, Jimmy heard the chime of another text message and pulled out his phone.

" _sur hOp ur havn a betr day thn me."_

" _Just got a new lead. Why? What happened?"_

" _Nw lead? on Lang?"_

" _Sort of. Still working on it. Seriously, what's wrong?"_

" _Let's jst sy I've got a 'beary' big problem right nw. Keep me updted ok?"_

" _Uh...okay."_

"What is it now?" Judy asked, seeing him on his phone.

"Sounds like Nick's in trouble," Jimmy answered. "Though he apparently still has time to text me, so it can't be  _that_ serious, right?"

"Who knows with him?" Judy shook her head. "If he needs help, he'll call us...I hope. In the meantime, we need to get in there. Lead the way, Timber."

"You got it!" The wolf grinned and headed off towards the tent, chuckling merrily to himself. "Oh, I can't wait to show 'em what I'm made of!"

"He  _does_  know we left his bike back at the parking garage, right?" Grizzoli whispered over to Judy.

"He'll figure it out."

* * *

_The Rain Barrel_

_5: 21 PM_

"So I says, 'Buddy, you're messing with the wrong guy. I'll show  _you_ what happens when someone messes with our mom.' So I smacked him down good! Gave him a nice black eye to go with his black heart!"

"No one cares, Tony."

Grouped around one particular table, a trio of bored wolves looked upon a fourth, who seemed completely oblivious to their reactions. Tony Lupinson, better known as "Fast Tony", was never the most popular amongst his packmates. Dressed in a bright red track suit with a matching headband and sneakers, he already stuck out like a sore thumb. His unique personality and voice that wouldn't be out of place on a used car salesmammal only added to his charm. "No need to be jealous, guys. I mean, I only took down a bear after all."

"Yeah, a  _sun_ bear," a wolf drawled, chin resting on the table.

"Never seen anyone so dang proud of a sucker punch," said another, swishing a claw around his drink.

"Hey, if ya wanna show us how it's done, how about takin' care of that big fella over there?" The third wolf pointed over to Koslov, currently shaking down the hapless okapi bartender.

Fast Tony chuckled nervously. "Maybe I will. Just after I...you know...get done with my drink here…" He lifted the cup up to his muzzle and sipped, very slowly, at his beverage.

"Someone really needs ta do somethin' about those guys," the first wolf said, having no faith in his companion.

"Come on, they're not so bad, are they?" Tony asked. "We both know they're not getting anywhere, and even if something  _did_ happen to Lady Lang, that just means I have a shot at being Alpha. Oops, did I say that out loud?" The other wolves growled.

The front door slammed open and in came another canine, dripping wet and carrying a pungent odor that quickly washed over the entire bar. The wolves, once ready to attack the suited crooks at any given moment, simultaneously decided it wasn't worth it and fled the building en masse, one even throwing himself through a window rather than get close enough to the fragrant fox to use the door.

"Stop me if you've heard this one," Nick announced. "A fox and a hyena walk into a bar...and everyone else leaves."

"I'm sensing a flaw in your plan, Wilde," Carla remarked, seeing nearly the entire bar empty out in front of them. The only ones left were the two officers, the three criminals, the poor bartender, and some red-garbed wolf either too brave or too lazy to budge.

"Nonsense," he said, so casually he could've fooled the unenlightened. "I've got them right where I want them."

"Uh-huh. So who's backing us up now,  _that_  guy?" She gestured over to Fast Tony, who stiffened up slightly.

"I could! Just...give me a second…" His tongue lapped gingerly at his drink.

But Nick's focus was squarely on the black-suited brigands. "So...Fangs and Boomer, what's it like returning from the dead?"

"We could ask you the same thing, mate," the kangaroo shot back.

"What the bloody hell are  _you_  doin' here?!" Fangs shouted, taking a wary step behind his partner.

"My tail's got a few choice words for you, Fangs. Sure you don't want to come kiss it and make it better?"

He poked his head out from behind Boomer. "Piss off! I ain't gettin' anywhere near ya!"

"Because of the smell?"

"Because I'm already on thin ice for roughin' ya up!"

"Very thin," Koslov added.

 _Just like I thought. I_  am _marked!_

Ignoring the chill that ran up his spine, Nick managed to keep his composure. "Nice to see Count Crimekiller bringing Tundratown and Outback Island together. You've even got team uniforms." He looked them up and down, from the diminutive dingo to the massive polar bear. "Though I will say, one brand of suit for every size of mammal? Not a bad idea." He reached up and tugged on his tie.

"Don't  _compliment_ them!" Carla hissed.

Dropping the bartender behind the counter, who wisely got the heck out of there, Koslov stepped forward and shoved Fangs and Boomer to either side. "Now Nikolai, there's no need for such hostile attitude. As you say, we are all friends here."

"Right. And I bet you said the same thing to Mr. Big before you helped murder him."

"You think you can criticize me after the swindle you pulled?"

"Are you seriously making that comparison?" Nick asked in disbelief. "Me selling him a bad rug doesn't have anything to do with you guys icing him!"

Koslov's mouth turned upwards, into a knowing smile. "Are you sure about that?"

"What are you-?"

"Hey, as nice as it is watching you make smalltalk with the enemy, were we planning to do something?" Carla asked.

Nick shot her a sideways glance, still trained on Koslov. "Fine. Carrots, call for backup."

Carla growled at him.

"Oh, right. Sniggers, call for backup."

"I don't have a radio."

"And why not?"

"Because I'm just a trainee! Why don't  _you_ have one?"

"Because it was too cumbersome to carry around."

"Hopps has one and she's half your size!"

"Which is why I let  _her_ handle it."

"So what, we're out of luck?!"

"Relax, I'll just use my phone."

Nick reached for his pocket, only to be grabbed up by the giant paw of Koslov. "There was only so much of that I could take." He chucked Nick across the room, where he landed on top of a table, breaking it under his weight. Fast Tony took another drink.

"Been there, done that," said Carla, unconcerned.

"Whoa, there! Easy, easy!" Fangs cried frantically, stepping in front of Koslov. "We're not supposed to damage the merchandise, remember?"

"He'll live." Koslov pushed him aside again and stomped over to Nick. "Now then, Nikolai, you are coming with me."

The front door was kicked open again, a significantly larger wolf entering the premises. "Actually, he's coming with  _me,_ " Felix said darkly.

* * *

_Danger Dan's Derby!_

_5: 22 PM_

The inside of the tent was, to put to it simply, pure chaos. Bleachers were arranged around the place, filled with rowdy, screaming wolves, which included their new escort. Timber failed to notice the discomfort of his new cop friends, who couldn't keep track of just how many safety and ordinance laws were being broken right in front of them.

On the bright side, they had gotten seats to this "performance" with surprising ease. All it took was some assurance that they weren't here to break up the derby and Timber was able to get them right in. The Lang Family were actually a pretty amiable group when they weren't trying to kill them, though the chewing out they got from Felix probably helped.

" _We have got one heckuva show here tonight, fellas!"_ shouted a wolf covered in oil stains and holding a megaphone, presumably Danger Dan, standing square in the middle of this hellish landscape as if it were the local playground. " _Ohhh, what's this?! It looks like 'Silver Bullet'' is having himself a showdown against crowd favorite 'Bone Chewer'!"_

Two wolves stared each other down, one on a dark grey bike that had a broken train track girdle attached like a jousting pole, and the other on an off-white bike with spinning tire irons hooked to the sides. The wolves revved up their bikes and charged.

"Is the derby normally this...dangerous?" Judy asked, wincing as Silver Bullet swerved to the left at the last second, avoiding the tire irons, but being knocked from his bike in the process.

"Nah, this is sissy stuff," Timber waved his paw dismissively as he watched one of Bone Chewer's weapons fly off the handle from the impact, nailing the rider in the jaw. "Just y'all wait until Junior shows up. That's when it  _really_ gets goin'!"

"That was the plan," Judy said, resigned. "Guess we just sit and wait then."

"I'll be glad to get this over with," Grizzoli grumbled. "And hopefully never see another wolf again."

"Hey now, that's a bit uncalled for."

"Is it?" Grizzoli pointed to the two wolves currently riding his shoulders, their compromise for taking up so much room on the seats. One of them was beating the back of his head in excitement and the other was shouting obscenities towards the arena.

"It's funny you say that," Jimmy chuckled, "because before I came here, I heard that  _you_ were a wolf."

Grizzoli looked mortified. "Where the hell did you hear that?! I have enough problems with people thinking I'm a grizzly bear!"

"Sorry, sorry, must have been a clerical error."

"I'll say!"

"Hey, here he comes now!" said Timber, trying to nudge Judy in the shoulder, but getting her cheek instead.

The group didn't have to look very hard to find Junior. The entire tent heralded his arrival, though not with a chorus of cheers as they expected, but rather  _jeers._

"Hey, Junior, here ya got grounded by Mommy!"

"Guess ya won't be much competition this time!"

"Have fun watchin' us have fun!"

Junior growled halfheartedly as he slumped over to a vacant spot and plopped himself down, a pitiful pout on his muzzle. "Let's go talk to him," Judy said, rising from her seat.

"Are you sure? He doesn't really seem in the mood," Jimmy pointed out.

He bobbed Wallace's head to make him nod in agreement. " _Major Party Pooper."_

"We don't have a choice. And from my experience, most mammals don't like talking to cops anyway." Another unfortunate reality of her job that she'd discovered the hard way.

"Fine with me." Grizzoli got right up, toppling his lupine stragglers.

"Hey, Junior?" The green-garbed biker sat up instantly at the sound of Judy's voice.

"What in Sam Hill are  _you_ doin' here?!" he shouted accusingly. "Haven't ya caused me enough trouble already?!"

"Um... _you_ attacked  _us,_ " said Grizzoli.

Junior seethed at the remark. "Lemme' guess, yer still hot on Momma's trail, huh?"

"Well...yes," Judy admitted. "But-"

"But  _nothin'!_ Tryin' to squeeze info outta me is more pointless than an arctic mouse hitchhikin' in a snowstorm!" He violently snapped his jaws in Judy's face. "SO BEAT IT!"

"Come on, Junior, don't be so unaccomodatin'," said Timber. "These guys are cool, trust me." Judy raised an eyebrow, wondering when they had suddenly become best buddies.

"It's nice to see ya gettin' all chummy with the ZPD, but unless ya got somethin' meaningful ta contribute, I suggest takin' yer traitorous tail right on outta here!"

"How about an honor duel?"

"And another thing! I-" Junior froze mid-rant. "What was that?"

"An honor duel. It's a challenge between one wolf and another for-"

Junior smacked him across the muzzle. "I know what an honor duel is, ya idgit!"

" _We_  don't," Jimmy piped in, raising a paw.

"It's a challenge between one wolf and another for some kind of higher standin' in the pack," Timber repeated. "It's a less violent way of solving conflicts."

Judy's ears flattened at the sound of another loud crash. "As much as it seems like you could use more of those, we're not wolves."

"Yeah, ya hear that, they ain't wolves!" Junior said loudly, jabbing Timber in the chest.

"Actually, only one party has to be a wolf. It's been used to settle disputes with outsiders sometimes."

"Dang it, Timber, you've a got bigger mouth than a hippo gettin' a root canal!" Junior roared, stomping his foot. "But I still hafta  _accept_  the challenge! And I don't! SO THERE!"

Timber tried to argue, but his voice died in his throat. "Got me there. Sorry, guys."

"I'm surprised you feel that way, Junior," Judy said innocently. "I thought for sure you wanted to be able to ride tonight."

The wolf's anger dissipated, replaced by confusion. "Wha…?"

"I mean, if it's a challenge this serious, you would be entitled to use everything at your disposal, right? Including that impressive bike of yours." She looked down, pretending not to notice the gears turning in Junior's brain. "But I guess you wouldn't want to settle anything with us anyway. Even if you  _could_  get us out of your fur for good if you won. Probably make Momma proud and everything..."

"Ohhhhh, no! You are  _not_ bringing up my momma!" Junior yelled. "Ya want a duel so bad, fine! IT! IS! ON!"

Jimmy looked at Judy in sheer awe. "How did you do that?"

"It's easy." She pointed to herself. "Sly bunny." Then to Junior. "Dumb wolf."

"I'll show  _you_ who's the dumb one! Just name a time and a place, little lady!"

"Uh...here and now?"

"Deal!" He reared his head back and shouted over the crowd, an impressive feat given the ambiance. "Y'all forget about yer junkmobiles for a while! The  _real_ show is about ta begin!"

The crowd cheered in approval.

* * *

_The Rain Barrel_

_5: 34 PM_

Nick looked back and forth between the freakishly large wolf and freakishly large bear, both vying over him. Unfortunately, it seemed neither of them were particularly bothered by his current ripeness. "It's nice to feel wanted and all, but do I get a say in this?"

"No!" they yelled in unison.

"Well, that's just plain uncivil," he said, shaking his head. "Besides, I'm not even the one you really want.  _He_ is." He pointed across the room, making everyone around him look in that direction. When they looked back, Nick was gone, now dashing for the hole in the window on the opposite side.

Before he could reach it, Felix bounded across the room and cut him off with an unnatural speed for a guy his size. He quickly grabbed Nick by the arm and stuck a foot behind his ankle to trip him to the ground, then stepped on his chest. "You won't get away from me  _that_ easily."

"Almost did." Felix twisted his arm, making him yelp.

Koslov started towards them, but suddenly turned around and caught the wires of a pair of electrodes aimed for his back. He gave a sharp yank, pulling the taser from the paws of Carla Hyenandez. "Our weapons are remarkably useless." She was promptly kicked into the wall by Boomer.

"Yeah, bar fight!" Fast Tony cheered, leaning back in his seat as if it didn't concern him in the slightest. "Go get 'em, Dumbass-I mean, Felix!"

The larger wolf turned his head to glare at him, letting Koslov blindside him with a right hook in that moment of distraction, knocking him off of Nick. Koslov made a grab for the fox, but was then tackled by Felix, who he had (understandably) not expected to recover from his punch. Watching the two monstrous mammals go at it, Nick backed away slowly.

As he did, he suddenly bumped into something, and looked over his shoulder to see that it was Boomer. "Hey there, mate!" the kangaroo said, forcing a smile. "How ya doin'?"

"...Fine, I guess?"

"That's good, I-" He was bashed over the head with a barstool, courtesy of Carla. The hyena followed up by grabbing his tail and swinging him into the counter, knocking over several more stools.

Nick whistled approvingly. "Okay, you seem to have a handle on things here. I'll go deal with Fangs."

Carla reached back and slapped his paw. "Tag."

"Huh?"

Boomer flew at Carla with another kick, which she quickly dodged, letting Nick take it instead. "Ah geez, sorry about that! Are you okay?"

"Just...peachy…" Nick grumbled from underneath him.

Koslov threw a punch at Felix, which he caught, then grabbed his arm while landing a kick to his face. "You are well-trained, mutt," Koslov grunted, wiping blood from his lip. "What style is this?"

"CQ2CP," Felix answered calmly, nailing Koslov in the chin with a palm strike, then hoisting him by the shoulders to topple him onto another table. "Close Quarters Combat: Coordinated Pack. It's one of seven lupine martial arts I've mastered."

"Fascinating." As Felix leapt at him, Koslov caught both of his wrists and headbutted him in the solar plexus. "But I prefer the simpler methods. Less...finesse perhaps, but effective nonetheless."

Koslov kicked Felix off of him and the two continued to grapple with each other, to the great amusement of Fast Tony. "So, Felix, if you kick the bucket, who gets to replace you? Not that I'm asking for any reason in particular."

"How's tha show?" asked Fangs, glumly sliding into the seat next to him.

"My money's on the bear, or maybe that's just wishful thinking," Tony replied. "Aren't you going to help?"

"Nah, guy's kind of a prick, and me mate can handle this on his own. I've had enough trouble for one day."

"Too bad."

He was suddenly yanked out of his seat from behind by Carla, who threw him onto the counter. Grabbing him by the throat, she dragged him across the countertop and over the other side. He hit the wall hard, causing a tap to start spilling alcohol over his face. The dingo wearily opened his mouth and caught some. "Ugh...Fruitopia…"

Hey, Boomer, can I ask you something?" Nick said casually, still pinned by the marsupial.

"Sure, I guess," the kangaroo said, pinching his nose. Nick was half-tempted to tell him that his big feet weren't exactly a rose garden either.

"How did you survive Outback? I thought that Simon guy shot you."

"He did. Used rubber bullets though so he could recruit us. Awfully generous of him."

"Yeah, he sure does seem 'generous' _,_ doesn't he?" Nick asked, rolling his eyes. "Think you can get off me now?"

"I think it's probably better if I don't."

"I disagree." Carla leapt onto his back, wrapping her limbs around him. With a loud yell, she threw her weight back and proceeded to suplex the kangaroo into the floor.

Nick stared awestruck at the now unconscious form of Boomer lying in front of him, then over to a similarly beaten Fangs, then up at the smugly satisfied Carla. "Where were  _you_ when I had to deal with these guys on Outback?!"

"Fighting a giant, grapple-proof mammal with a sadism complex. If you want to trade, Koslov's right there."

"Thanks for the offer, but I'd rather get out of here while I'm still breathing. Hold out your paw."

"Why?"

"Just do it."

The hyena glared suspiciously, but did as he said. "I swear, if this is another of your dumb jokes, I-" She looked down at the object dropped into her open paw. It was Nick's car keys.

Without warning, Nick turned and dashed for the door.

"H-Hey! Wait up!" Carla shouted after him.

"I'm the one they're after! Just get back to the station! I'll meet up with you later!"

Felix, seeing his quarry make a break for it, dodged out of the way of Koslov's next punch, then kicked him from behind, knocking him over. While the bear was stunned, he went for Nick. "I told you already, you will not escape me!"

Nick charged through the front door, already hearing the wolf in pursuit. Knowing he would never make it back to the car even if he  _could_ drive it, he instead went for the nearest form of transportation: one of the bikes left behind by the other wolves. Naturally, the only one that still had keys in the ignition was hot pink and decorated with the image of a scantily-clad lupine.

"Wilde!" Hesitating for only a second, he hopped on the bike and revved it up. He had no idea where he was going, so he settled on 'anywhere but here' and drove as fast as he could away from the bar.

But Felix was not one to give up so easily and mounted his own bike, sleek black and painted with the Lang Family insignia. It was nearly twice the size of the other bikes, with the engines visibly sticking out of its side. A wolf skull was mounted on the front, but where it came from he would not share with anyone. He never bothered to give the bike a name, but others called it Fenrir.

As soon as Felix sped off, Koslov emerged from the building as well. Seeing his target slip away, the polar bear rushed over to  _his_  vehicle, a giant truck formerly belonging to Mr. Big. It was now painted black, a testament to its new owner, but still equipped with a snow plow, a holdover from Tundratown he had never bothered to remove. You never knew when that kind of thing came in handy in this line of work.

Carla Hyenandez was last, and by the time she got into Nick's patrol car and started it, she knew she would have a hard time catching up. "I bet  _this_ wasn't part of the plan. Sly fox my spotted culo." She flipped the police sirens on and drove after them, not knowing she had brought two stowaways along for the ride.

"Are ya  _sure_  this is a good idea?" asked Fangs, clinging to the back of the car.

"Better than seeing what happens if we come back empty-pawed," Boomer countered.

"Fair dinkum."

Back in the bar, Fast Tony finally finished his drink, tossing the glass carelessly to the floor. "Alright, I'm good to go now. What, the party's over already? What a shame." He shrugged helplessly. "Oh well. Better luck next time."

He made to leave when he was abruptly hit hard over the head from behind. The wolf slumped to the floor and was dragged away, up the stairs to the second level of the building.

* * *

_DDDDD!_

_5: 39 PM_

It didn't take long for Judy's duel with Junior to get set up, and the entire arena had already been cleared out for it, leaving just her and the other officers standing there while Timber went off to procure a worthy ride.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Grizzoli asked. "I can't help but feel there's probably a safer alternative."

"I don't want a safe alternative, I want a fast one," Judy said, stretching her legs in preparation. "This is the best chance we have of finding Lady Lang before the Count does." She leaned back and forth, now stretching her arms. "Besides, it's probably not the most dangerous thing I've ever done. At least I'm fighting him  _with_ a bike this time."

"Can't argue with that. Just be careful, okay?" He put a paw on her back. "Some of us on the force might give you a hard time every now and then, but we do care about you. You're like our annoying little sister."

"Don't worry, I certainly know what  _that's_ like," Judy said, cracking her knuckles. "Now let's get this show on the road."

"Er...about that…"

Timber was back now, and he had a great deal of difficulty making eye contact. "I'm kinda ashamed to admit this, but we don't actually have a bike that's...your size…"

"...What?"

"Yeah, last guy who tried to enter with one was this shrimp called Little Lenny Lupus and we didn't allow it again after he had an...uh...accident." He rubbed the back of his head nervously. "So I'm afraid ya can't actually compete after all."

She shouldn't have been surprised. She really  _shouldn't_ have been. It was no secret that sizeism was still alive and well in Zootopia, especially among a pack of alpha wolves like these. Now  _she_  couldn't look anyone in the eye either.

"Alright, I'll bite the bullet," Grizzoli said, stepping forward. "Can't stand to see Hopps like this, so I guess I'll compete in her stead."

"Actually...I think you might be too  _big_ ," Timber said, smiling nervously. "Even Felix's bike wouldn't fit ya."

Judy and Grizzoli looked down and sighed in unison.

"Then I guess that leaves me." Jimmy Frost grinned, shooting him a thumbs-up. "If he's too big and she's too small, then I guess I'm just right!"

Judy barred his path in an instant. "No, no, no, no, nonononononoNONONO! We're competing with Junior here, not with Nick to see who can put you in more life-threatening danger. You are  _not_ doing this!"

"Judy, I  _have_  to," he said, surprising her with the firmness of his tone. "Ever since I joined up with you guys, I've done nothing but slow you down. It's time for me to be my own mammal, and that means taking charge for once." He pointed directly at Timber. "You!"

The wolf flinched a little. "...Yes?"

Jimmy narrowed his eyes. "I'm gonna need a sidecar."

Judy put a gentle paw on his leg. "Jimmy...I don't think they'll let me ride with you."

"Not a problem."

A few minutes later, Jimmy had chosen his bike. It was a medium-sized ride, stark white in color, armed with a pressurized nitrogen sprayer on the front, and large stop signs on each side to serve as shields. Per his request, it also had a sidecar, where Wallace now sat at attention. "I dub thee: the Motorsicle!"

Danger Dan was back in the ring. " _Now this here is promisin' to be one heck of a throwdown! I don't know who this runt is, but he's got some balls of steel to go up against the Champ! And speaking of which, here he comes now!"_

"Do you think Jimmy can win?" Grizzoli asked.

"I'm more concerned with if he can  _survive_ ," Judy said, her foot thumping rapidly. "But from what I remember of Junior's bike, he should be okay as long as he's careful. Those shields will probably help against the saws too."

" _And now, introducing the Champ on his prized bike Cerberus, let's give a big ol' howl for JUNIOR!"_

All at once, the wolves howled in greeting. Judy and Grizzoli might've joined in out of politeness if they weren't too busy gawking at Junior's bike. This was definitely  _not_ the same machine he rode before.

The Cerberus had the same green and black design of Junior's previous bike, but the similarities ended there. Instead of chainsaws, the bike was armed with a pair of large flamethrowers on each side of the handlebars. In the center of them was a scarily-realistic wolf skull, but not as scary as the large metal roller mounted on the front. "Ahahahahaha! How d'ya like that?!"

Jimmy gulped. "It's...very nice."

" _Y'all know the terms of this honor duel, but I'll explain them anyway! The duel goes on until one combatant either gives in, loses their bike, or dies!"_

"DIES?!" Judy screamed.

"Don't worry, that hardly  _ever_ happens," said Timber. Somehow, that didn't reassure her.

" _The winner gets one favor from the loser, that they must follow on penalty of being dishonored forever!"_

And that was all Jimmy cared about right now. "You know the deal, right? If I win, you bring us to Lang!"

"Sure, I remember!" Junior laughed. "And when  _I_ win, you and all y'all little cop friends are gonna hightail it outta here fer good!"

As he saw what could very well be his impending doom approaching, Jimmy could only think to give Nick a head's up as he promised.

" _At a derby about to fight an honor duel on weaponized bikes to find out where Lang's hiding. Just letting you know in case I don't make it back."_

It took a few moments to get a response.

" _gr8 let me kno f u win kndabusyrghtnowkthxbai"_

Junior kept ranting through all of this. "-and then Momma's gonna be so proud of me that I'll finally get that new gearbox I've always wanted! I won't lose!" He cranked both handlebars hard, unleashing a torrent of flames into the air. "BRING IT ONNNNNNNNNN!"

Jimmy steeled his gaze and revved up his bike. Win or lose, this was going to be  _awesome!_

" _Let the honor duel BEGIN!"_

* * *

_The Rain Barrel - Upper Level_

_5: 42 PM_

" _Finally_  some peace and quiet." Simon took a small sip from his drink, sighing in contentment. "I thought they would never leave."

"Doesn't sound sound sound like they got that Nikolai guy though." Across the table sat a skunk in burnt overalls and fur, his gas mask now sitting on the tabletop. His face wasn't much better to look at, his white cowlick and one of his ears partially singed, and one of his yellow eyes just a bit wider than the other. "Shouldn't we be doing something about that?"

"No need to bother. The Count said to stay put, so we'll stay put."

The skunk shrugged, raising his glass and noisily chugging it down, then casually flinging the object across the room, watching it shatter against the wall.

"Hey, careful! Not all of us have that protective gear, you know!" Lucy yelled indignantly. "Never interrupt a lady in the middle of her meal." With a small scoff, she turned back to a bound-and-gagged wolf lying on the floor. The lupine was one of four Lang Family representatives here to discuss terms with the bar's proprietors. Unfortunately for them, they had already come to an agreement with the Count, who offered to  _not_ burn the place to the ground in exchange for their cooperation. "Now hold still, sweetie. I need to find a good vein."

Willing to watch anything other than Lucy feeding, Simon turned his head back to the newest member of their wolf collection. Fast Tony was still out like a light...or so it seemed.

Simon squinted at the wolf suspiciously, then kicked him in the gut with his metal leg.

"Ow! What the heck?!" Tony put his paws to his mouth, but the damage had been done. "Please don't kill me!" he groveled, backing away from the raccoon.

"If I was going to kill you, I would have already," Simon said, nevertheless giving him a murderous glare.

Tony looked over at his wolf brethren, tied up and being fed on in the corner. "Please don't eat me either!"

Simon slapped him, hard. "Just shut up and listen! We're here to recruit you."

"R-Recruit me for what?"

"Boy, this guy is dense dense dense!" the skunk laughed.

"Is that the mammal who's been torching our hangouts?!" Tony asked, more surprised than angered.

"Yes. He goes by Harvey Montapue, our resident arson and demolitions expert."

"I burn things  _real_  good!" Harvey greeted.

Lucy pulled her blood-stained fangs from the wolf's neck and licked her lips. "Delish! See, that wasn't so bad, was it?" she asked, nuzzling his cheek. The wolf only whimpered in response. "So are we doing introductions now?" She turned to Tony and did a curtsy. "Lucy Sang, professional thief and espionage expert. And grumpy-pants over there is Simon VanDal."

"Simon will suffice," the raccoon said firmly.

"Wait, VanDal? Isn't that the name of-" He stopped when he saw Simon's head snap towards him. "...Simon will suffice."

"Anyway,  _my_ role is, to put it simply, a hired gun. It isn't what I  _want_ to be, but outside circumstances have put me in this position."

"What kind of circumstances?" Tony asked, still not entirely sure what was going on.

"Let's just say our boss and I have a common goal and leave it at that."

"He's a real enigma, that one. Me, I'm just in it for the money," Lucy admitted, flying up to perch on the back of a chair. "Always have been. It's the simplest way to get through life, without having to worry about all of those complexities like 'feelings' and such. You ever heard of the Felidae Infernum?"

"I...can't say I have,"

The bat giggled loudly to herself. "Yeah...I  _bet_ you haven't…"

"That's called being a sociopath," said Simon.

"You're one to talk! And what about Harvey? He literally came out of a nuthouse!"

"I'm never going back!" Harvey yelled, rocking back and forth in his seat. "Never never never never never nev-AHHHHHHH!"

Seeing the skunk suddenly convulse, Tony looked closely at him. "Is that a tame collar?"

"Yep. We tried to take it off, but apparently, he doesn't want us to."

"It helps give me a good jolt when I need stimulation," Harvey said, shrugging off the shock immediately.

"Pretty sure that's the exact opposite of what it was designed for, but whatever works for you."

"And that about covers it," Simon said to Fast Tony. "You already know what we're after and you're not entitled to the details until you join us. So what do you say?"

"Just to clarify, what do I get out of this?"

"You don't end up like  _them."_ Tony noted the tied-up wolves writhing on the floor, who seemed inclined to tear him a new one just for considering this. "Also, you'll get to take over operations in this district once we get rid of Lang."

"Works for me! I'm tired of these jokers anyway." The wolves started snarling and thrashing in rage, making him subconsciously check if their ropes looked tight enough.

Even Simon was a bit caught off-guard by how quickly he accepted. "...Good. We've been trying to get an inside perspective into the Lang Family for a while now, but the rest of your comrades have been so damn stubbornly loyal. Now then…" He smiled wickedly. "Tell us where we can find Lady Lang."

"Can't."

"...What?"

"I don't know where Lang is. They didn't trust me with that information," he said nervously, hoping this wouldn't result in a bullet through the head. The other wolves were actively rooting for just that.

"I guess it couldn't be  _that_ easy," Simon groaned, running a paw down his face.

"Cheer up, we've still got got got a plan, right?" asked Harvey.

"Boy, do we ever!" Lucy grinned, putting her wings behind her head. "You guys don't know this, but the Count already has a solution."

"And what would  _that_ be?" asked Simon, clenching his paws. Of  _course_ he didn't bother to share that with the rest of them! Why would he?

"Only one of the most devious, twisted plans I've ever heard!" Lucy cackled gleefully. "I'm getting all giddy just thinking about it!"

"It's really that good?" he asked doubtfully. "His previous plans have lacked a certain...quality assurance."

"Oh no, this is the same," she amended. "Just as convoluted as anything else he comes up with."

"Then why are you so confident?"

"I'm not," she said bluntly. "I'm at least 90% certain this operation is going to crash and burn. Whenever I pull a heist, I plan it out to the finest, most minuscule detail to make sure it goes absolutely flawlessly. But him? He practically makes it up as he goes along, and yet it somehow  _works_. I don't know if he's a genius or just lucky, but either way, the odds aren't in his favor. Once he inevitably ends up behind bars, so be it. No skin off  _my_ teeth."

Simon frowned, not exactly satisfied with that answer. "Whatever. As long as I get what's mine, the guy can fall off a cliff for all I care."

"He'd probably survive too."

"Hmph." He went back to his drink, he and Harvey losing all interest in the conversation.

Fast Tony just sat there uncomfortably, his presence once again ignored. "So, uh, I don't have to wear one of those tacky suits, do I?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're just not even going to comment on the chapter lengths anymore. The next one's probably going to be even longer. Oh well. :P
> 
> As mentioned before, Harvey Montapue belongs to Mind Jack. What we didn't mention is that he had perhaps the most troubled design process out of anything in this fic. He went from an albino chipmunk, to an albino skunk, to a normal skunk, to having a redneck accent, to having a New Orleans accent, to having that incomprehensible stutter, to having a tame collar. But at least we finally settled on something!
> 
> "Our weapons are remarkably useless." The biggest challenge with writing fight scenes in a Zootopia fic is the fact that the main characters are all equipped with weapons capable of instantly incapacitating an opponent, meaning that in any given fight, said weapons must be either completely ineffective or just not enough to end the fight in five seconds. Figured we might as well lampshade it at some point.
> 
> Shoutout to MusicaLoraineJourney for coming up with those drink names and PresidentStalkeyes for CQ2CP.
> 
> Now it's time to announce the voices you guys came up with for the OC's! Plenty of interesting choices here:
> 
> Carla Hyenandez: Carmelita Fox, a hispanic soap opera actress, The Grey Coincidence's Spanish teacher, Penelope Cruz, Catalina (Grand Theft Auto III), Angelina Jolie while chewing gravel, Rosa Diaz, Sara Ramirez, Michelle Rodriguez
> 
> Jimmy Frost: Jesse Eisenberg, Pinky (minus the Brain), Spike (MLP), Robin Williams, Charles Boyle, Elijah Wood
> 
> Simon VanDal: Ralph Fiennes, Solid Snake/ Sam Fisher, Ron White, Woody Harrelson, a Scottish pirate (Why does everyone seem to think Simon's European? Seriously. Leave an answer in your review. I have to know. XD-Mind Jack)
> 
> Lucy Sang: Juri Han, Helena Bonham Carter, Serpentine (Freedom Planet), Cassiopeia (League of Legends), Laura Bailey
> 
> Harvey Montapue: Heihachi (Tekken) Shia LeBouf, Mark Hamill
> 
> Lady Lang: Dame Judi Dench, The Grey Coincidence's Mom.
> 
> Junior: Billy Ray Cyrus, Larry the Cable Guy, Wade (GTA V)
> 
> Felix: Kit Harington, "Stone Cold" Steve Austin, Keanu Reeves, Nolan North
> 
> Damien Thornbrush: Steve Irwin
> 
> Fangs: Jeice (DBZ Abridged)
> 
> Boomer: Kevin Hart
> 
> Sandcat Sanchez: Antonio Banderas, Cheech Marin
> 
> Koslov: Vitali Baganov, Vladimir Kulich
> 
> The Count: Tony Soprano, Troy Baker, Liam Neeson, Jack Nicholson
> 
> Wallace: Spongebob, Plank (Ed, Edd n Eddy)


	14. All in the Family

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp. We've finally done it, guys. A 10K+ update. Feel free to either celebrate or moan to your heart's content.
> 
> Shame we had to do it on such a boring chapter though. This one's pretty filler honestly. Not much of significance happens here.

****

**Chapter 14: All in the Family**

_Rainforest District_

_The Wolf's Den_

_6: 00 PM_

Lady Lang looked up at the clock on her office wall, watching as another hour slowly ticked by. It was getting late. Her tail swished side to side in apprehension. It was a distinctly unpleasant feeling, knowing that it was only a matter of time before  _something_ happened. Whether that something was Felix returning with her invited guest or a much worse alternative, she wasn't sure.

She sighed, resting one paw on the window of her office. The moon had still not risen over the canopy yet.

In any case, the situation was getting increasingly dangerous. This stalemate could not go on for much longer. Once she said her piece to young Nicholas Wilde, she would go through with her plan and leave Zootopia for good. Already, she and Felix had devised a way to sneak her out of the city right under her enemy's nose. It wouldn't be long until this Count picked up on it, especially if he  _was_ who she thought he was, but she would hopefully be long gone by then.

Her lip curled upward into a silent snarl, painted claws scratching the glass.

Not that she feared death by any means. You didn't get to be one of the most powerful crime lords in Zootopia with that kind of cowardice. No, Lady Lang did this only for her children. If she was out of the picture, then perhaps they might be spared. But those boys were ruffians and vagabonds, with barely any control over their own lives. What would they do without their mother to watch over them? How would they ever survive?

Clenching her paw, she punched it weakly against the window, slumping her head against the pane.

That was what made this choice so difficult. No matter what happened, she would be losing her children tonight. But every parent had to let their children go sooner or later, and one way or another, that time was fast approaching.

Lang looked up into the window, her reflection showing a soft smile.

"They grow up so fast..."

* * *

_Torrential Turnpike_

_6: 07 PM_

In his panic to get away, Nick really should have paid more attention to where he was actually going. He'd somehow gone from a relatively quiet suburban bar to the single busiest highway in the entire district. At least he could keep his cool enough to stay on the road, but the rain flying in his face and the cars racing past him were not making him feel any more relaxed. "Geez, how did I end up all the way out here? This looks like the set for some big car chase or something."

"Wilde!"

"AHH!" Nick swerved to the left as Felix suddenly rode up on his right. He was mounted on a bike significantly more impressive than his, not that it was hard to outclass the pink nightmare. "What do you  _want_ from me?!"

"Miss Lang wants to speak with you! It'll be a lot easier for both of us if you just come quietly!"

Nick rolled his eyes. "Right! She just wants to talk! I've been around the block enough times to know what  _that_ means!"

"No, really, it seemed like she would take good care of you!" the wolf insisted.

"Yeah, I'm sure she'll 'take care of me' real good!"

"Damn mob lingo," Felix muttered. "Fine! Then I'll take you by force!"

"Well, at least you're being honest now!"

Felix growled and drove in close to take a swipe at him. Nick quickly drove away, curving around a passing car. As Felix came in again, Nick sped up to avoid him, then around a larger minivan. Revving up Fenrir, Felix drove up on the other side of the van. He knew his bike was faster than the pitiful thing the fox was riding and he would have no problem cutting him off.

But when he reached the front of the van, Nick was nowhere in sight. Looking behind him, he saw that Nick had cut the gas and was now escaping into another lane. "Cheeky little bastard."

"Works every time," Nick chuckled to himself. Before he could boast any further, he felt his bike suddenly leave the ground. He looked down, seeing that he was now sitting in the clutches of a giant snow plow. He revved the bike experimentally a few times, but the curvature of the plow kept him from going anywhere no matter how much his wheels spun.

"You will not escape me, Nikolai," Koslov warned, one paw on the plow's lever. "Now let's get you out of here, shall we?"

"Thanks, but you're probably the second-worst taxi service I've ever gotten."

Koslov grunted as the truck was rammed in the side by the small, yet sturdy form of Fenrir. "He's  _mine!"_ Felix hissed.

"Take him if you can, pup." Driving the truck back into him, Koslov pushed Felix across the turnpike and into the stone partition that kept them on the road, causing sparks to fly as the lupine struggled to stay on course. Reaching into his pocket, Felix drew a handgun and shot a few rounds into the passenger side window, leaving sizable dents, but not breaking it. "Bullet proof glass," Koslov chuckled. "You don't survive long in the underworld without it."

"That's a shame." Standing up in his seat, Felix reared back his fist and punched a hole in the weakened window. Eyes wide, Koslov quickly pulled away before the wolf could fire again, inadvertently shoving the plow lever forward in the process.

"This is my stop!" Nick waved and drove himself off of the lowered plow, taking off behind another row of cars.

Koslov looked between Nick on his left and Felix on his right. "I miss the simple days. I tell mammal to listen, he listen."

* * *

_Derby Arena_

_6: 06 PM_

"Boy, I'm gonna cook ya up hotter than a reindeer wearin' a parka in Sahara Square!"

"You'll have to catch me first!" Jimmy swerved out of the way of a plume of fire as Junior passed him. The Cerberus and the Motorsicle reached the opposite ends of the arena, turned around and charged each other, again and again. They had yet to actually collide or do any serious damage, but it was only a matter of time.

On the sidelines, Judy had her ears held over her eyes nearly the whole time, but she didn't miss anything as Danger Dan kept them all updated. " _Now_  that _was a close one, folks! Almost took that boy's tail right off! Maybe next time!"_

"Please tell me he's okay," Judy begged, trembling in her seat.

"For now, he seems to be doing okay," Grizzoli answered carefully. "It looks like a stalemate so far."

As the two bikes clashed again, Junior turned a flamethrower towards Jimmy and fired. Jimmy countered with his own blast of nitrogen spray, and the two opposing elements cancelled each other out, creating a small poof of smoke before the bikes raced past each other again.

"Which only means that neither of them have been horribly maimed yet," said Judy. "As much as I'd like it, Jimmy's not going to win this by just keeping up."

"So you want him to go Bambo on the guy?"

"No! I mean, yes! I mean, AGGH!" Judy squeezed her own ears tightly enough to make them hurt. "I just want him to get out of this with all of his body parts intact! Is that too much to ask?"

The more maneuverable Motorsicle ran circles around the comparatively clunky Cerberus, though the latter's range kept Jimmy from getting too close. "Ha! What's wrong, squirt?! 'Fraid yer ice is gonna get melted?!"

Jimmy suddenly veered straight into him, his stop sign shield blocking most, but not all, of the flames. He winced from the pain as his paws and the end of his tail were singed, which didn't stop him from ramming into Junior. The wolf buckled from the blow, hissing as the hot metal shield was pressed into him. "Ya little punk!" he yelled, clutching and blowing on his burnt arm.

"What's wrong? Afraid your fire's gonna get snuffed?" Jimmy asked, grinning playfully. Only then did he notice his paws were on fire and quickly patted them out.

" _Awright, now we're gettin' somewhere! This duel's really heatin' up now, in more ways than one!"_

Grizzoli gently patted the back of a near-hyperventilating Judy. "It's okay. Just a little burn. Nothing the kid can't handle."

She cautiously lifted an ear away from her eye and peeked out just a bit. "Oh sweet cheese and firecrackers, Jimmy, I  _really_ hope you know what you're doing."

* * *

_Torrential Turnpike_

_6: 12 PM_

"Those guys can play with each other all they want, but  _I'm_ getting out of here," Nick muttered, watching Felix and Koslov go at it again, now in motorized form. It was then he remembered that he was still stuck on a crowded freeway. "The question is  _how._ "

"Wilde!"

He flinched at the shout, until he realized it had come from his opposite side. The reassuring sight of the patrol car and its flashing lights came up next to him, Carla in the driver's seat. "I told you to get back to the station!" Nick called out to her.

"And  _I_ told  _you_ I wasn't letting you out of my sights! Now get the hell in here before I change my mind!"

"Don't mind if I do," Nick smiled, reaching for the passenger side door.

"Oh no ya don't!" Nick backed away as Boomer took a swipe at him from the roof, Fangs clinging for dear life next to him. "We're not goin' down like this, mate!"

"You brought  _them_ too?!" Nick yelled.

"I didn't know!" Carla snapped back.

"Seriously, you do  _not_ get to talk to me about being unobservant! Just shake them off!"

Fangs screamed bloody murder as Carla made a sharp turn to the left, then right, then left again. Boomer's long feet and low center of gravity let him keep his balance, while Fangs wrapped himself tightly around the roo's tail. In the distraction, Nick drove in close again and managed to get the door open.

"C'mere!" He almost made it back into the car when Boomer successfully grabbed him by the back of his shirt and hoisted him up to the roof. He couldn't say he felt sorry for the tacky pink motorbike as it spun out of control and fell into the middle of the road, but he did for the poor mammals he had just put into an instant traffic jam.

"Okay, ya got him!  _Now_ what?!" Fangs yelled.

Boomer blinked a few times. "Didn't really think of that part."

"Guys, I appreciate that you like my car enough to hitch a ride," Nick said, whipping out his taser, "but I'm still gonna have to charge you!" He shot for Boomer, only for the kangaroo to shove the weapon aside, causing it to miss and subsequently fly out of Nick's paws. The brief struggle knocked both of them over, wrestling for control on the rooftop.

"You might have better luck if you didn't crack a stupid one-liner every time you do something!" Carla advised, now trying to keep the car as steady as possible.

"Don't even joke about that!" Nick protested, squeezing a paw out of the kangaroo's grip and punching him across the muzzle.

"I'm not! That's my point!"

"Boomer, incoming!" Fangs shouted fearfully.

Felix had finally caught up, driving towards them on the passenger's side. "I'll be taking what's mine now!" He made a grab for Nick, which the fox responded to by grabbing the still-swinging car door and slamming it in his face. The wolf skidded backwards from the blow, but quickly regained control and growled. "I'll give you one thing, Wilde, you sure know how to tick a guy off!"

"Thanks! It's my specialty!" Boomer wrapped his arms around him again and pulled him back, both mammals landing on the flashing police lights and shattering them instantly. The vulpine and marsupial only got more aggressive, becoming a tangled mess of fur and claw. As Felix reached them again, he tried to keep his eyes on the bushy tail of Nick.

"Gotcha!" His paw shot forward, grabbing hold of the tail and pulling its owner off of the car.

"Uh...hey there, mate," Fangs laughed nervously, making Felix snarl at him.

"There you are!" Koslov shouted, his large truck coming up behind the group.

"I think this belongs to you!" Felix turned and threw a screaming Fangs straight through the polar bear's windshield.

"Bulletproof glass not what it used to be," Koslov noted, looking down at the dazed dingo now lying his lap.

"Thanks for the lift," he said, sighing in relief.

"Do you have Nikolai? No? Then you are not done!"

Koslov picked up the dingo-shaped projectile and flung him back at Felix, who was just making another attempt to grab Nick. The terrified Fangs clung to the wolf's head, inadvertently covering his eyes and making him veer into the vehicle. The sudden impact made Boomer lose his grip on Nick, who quickly ducked into the car and slammed the door. Boomer pulled on the locked door and pounded on the window in vain while Nick stuck his tongue out at him.

He turned to Carla, who looked apprehensive. "What? He can't get in."

The kangaroo swung down from the roof, his powerful legs kicking straight through the window to slam into Nick, who slammed into Carla, who slammed into the opposite door, knocking it open.

"Hijo de puta, I could kill you for this, Wilde!" the hyena screamed, hanging on to the swinging door.

"Get in line," Nick choked out, Boomer wrapping an arm around his throat while he just barely managed to keep control of the wheel with his feet.

"Lemmeinlemmeinlemmein!" Fenrir came close enough again for Fangs to leap off of Felix's back and into the car, leaving the wolf with several new scratches.

Boomer yanked Nick from the driver's seat and replaced him with the dingo. "Now we have a plan. Let's go!"

"Okay...sure," the traumatized canid replied, shooting nervous glances at the furious Carla while he put the car in gear.

Felix pulled his gun again and aimed it into the car, which Boomer countered by holding Nick in front of him like a shield. The wolf frowned, knowing the risk of hitting his quarry was too high. Instead, he slowly aimed the gun downwards, directly at one of the wheels.

"Hey, don't even think about hurting my baby!" yelled Nick.

But before either of them could act, the patrol car shuddered, its back end getting just a bit higher. Koslov smirked, his snow plow wedged underneath the vehicle. "Enough of your foolishness. In my homeland,  _this_  is how we solve problem."

* * *

_Derby Arena_

_6: 10 PM_

"Whoa there!" Jimmy leaned the Motorsicle hard to the right, avoiding a blast of fire as it soared over his head, scorching his perked ears. Junior went to look down at him when Jimmy suddenly came back up, nailing him in the nose with a sign. By the time Junior stopped the bleeding, Jimmy had already retreated again.

" _Talk about a real grudge match, folks! I've never seen anyone give the Champ such a runaround before! This looks to be anyone's game!"_

"No it doesn't, ya greasy loudmouth!" Danger Dan had to duck when Junior chucked a wrench at his head.

Growling to himself, he turned his attention back to Jimmy, waiting patiently on the other side of the arena. By now, both of them were marred with signs of battle, Jimmy with a few stray burns and some missing fur, while Junior had bruising in several places and shivered uncontrollably from some close encounters with liquid nitrogen. Danger Dan was wrong indeed, for while the damage was roughly even, Jimmy was taking it a lot better than Junior.

"How is that little runt doin' this?" Junior asked himself, rubbing his snout in disbelief. In his many years as champion of the derby, he had never been pushed this hard by anyone, let alone some scrawny pup who looked like he couldn't lift more than thirty pounds. He wasn't even that skilled, barely staying on his bike half the time. So how was it that-

"Hey, can we keep going now? My foot's falling asleep!" Jimmy called from the other side. The crowd burst into laughter at his remark, laughter directed at the wolf.

"Shut up! I'll go when I'm good and ready!" he screamed back, despite his own extremities getting pretty numb by now. Dang nitrogen.

"Okay, cool!" Jimmy grinned, bobbing in his seat excitedly.

"That's it…" Junior realized, narrowing his eyes. "It's not his body that's tough, but his  _mind_. No one else I've fought ever risked getting this close to Cerberus, too afraid of gettin' fried. But him...it's like he's  _enjoyin'_ this. Like 'e doesn't even care what happens to 'im."

He watched Jimmy reach down and pet the Wallabeanie in his sidecar with a disturbing amount of affection. His muzzle formed into a scowl. "Then I'll just hafta  _make_ him care."

Without warning, he charged straight across the arena for Jimmy. The arctic fox sat right back up and charged back, firing off the nitrogen sprayer. As had become routine, Junior immediately countered with a flamethrower, but didn't change his course. Jimmy was forced to veer to the right to avoid the larger bike, surprised when Junior made no move in response. The two bikes returned to opposite sides again, no worse for wear.

"Man, this is going to take forever at this rate," Jimmy sighed. "Guess we'll just have to keep on pressing on, right Wallace?" He glanced over to the sidecar and gasped in horror when he found it empty. "Wallace?!"

"Ya gave it a name?" Junior asked smugly, holding up the stolen Wallabeanie.

" _Talk about a low blow! It looks like the Champ has taken a hostage! ...No wait, it's just a plushie."_

"Give him back!" Jimmy demanded.

"Give him back!" Junior repeated mockingly, waving Wallace around. "I can't believe I've been havin' this much trouble against someone wussier than an elephant in Little Rodentia! Let me show ya exactly how much I care about you  _or_ this stewpid toy!"

With a twisted grin, he tossed Wallace on the ground a few feet in front of him and drove.

"WALLACE!"

Before Jimmy could do anything, Wallace disappeared under the steamroller, its tiny paw reaching towards him in longing.

* * *

_Torrential Turnpike_

_6: 16 PM_

"Fangs, get us out of here!" Boomer shouted over a struggling Nick.

"What do ya think I'm  _trying_ to do?! This damn blighter won't budge!"

"Then hurry up and figure something out!" The kangaroo grimaced as Nick's current aroma, easily ignored in the intense rooftop battle, started to become a lot more noticeable in this confined space.

Nick smiled deviously and intentionally pressed himself even closer. "That's right, smeeeeell the skunky fox." Boomer gagged and turned his head away, eyes watering. Nick shot an elbow into the kangaroo's tormented nose while he was distracted, slipping out from under his arm and hastily climbing back to the roof again. With the car about as mobile as a cinder block, Fangs and Boomer ditched the wheel and climbed out after him, followed by a livid Carla. Not willing to lose Fenrir, Felix pulled out a small tow rope and tethered the bike to the car before leaping onto the roof himself.

Nick reached the top and dusted himself off, only to turn around and find four other mammals standing on the moving vehicle with him. "Wow, I am feeling  _so_ vindicated right now."

All at once, they lunged, colliding into a heap inches away from Nick and quickly getting violent in their efforts to reach him. Backing away, Nick unwittingly stepped onto the front of the ice truck, where he was grabbed from behind by Koslov and dragged across the surface.

"It is time to stop running, Nikolai. Cooperate, and you have my word you will not be harmed."

"You'll forgive me for not trusting your word after Mr. Big paid the price for it," Nick shot back, trying in vain to pull himself out of the bear's iron grip.

"Still you go on about Mr. Big? I don't see why you care so much about this."

"Because he took me in when no one else would, raised me until I was experienced enough to survive on my own! Sure, we had our differences in later years, but I would never have even made it that far if not for him!" Before he could be pulled through the broken windshield, Nick snatched up a stray piece of glass and stabbed it into Koslov's paw.

The polar bear roared, releasing his hold on Nick to clutch the wounded appendage. "You give him too much credit," he said, pained. "Why do you think we ever took you in to begin with? Do you think it is because we  _liked_ you?"

"He...he told me that he saw potential in me," Nick replied, getting that unwelcome feeling of being hustled.

"Potential as a royal pain in the arse perhaps," Koslov laughed. "No, Mr. Big only grabbed you off the streets as a personal favor. He always  _was_  too generous with those."

"A favor to who?" Nick asked, and realized he had lost his focus for too long when he was tackled from behind.

"Yer not slippin' away this time," said Fangs, pinning Nick down until Koslov took a swing at him. "What the hell, mate?! We're on the same side!"

"I do not align myself with weaklings."

Koslov reached for the downed Nick, but the fox was yanked away by Felix, back onto the patrol car. The wolf was then bowled over by Carla, leaving Nick to fall and roll along the roof until he was stopped by Boomer's foot. The kangaroo went to grab him when Felix flung Carla into his face. Boomer toppled onto his back and Felix went for Nick, only to be tripped by Fangs, who pulled Nick away again.

It might have continued like this for some time if not for Nick suddenly punching the dingo square in the jaw. "ENOUGH ALREADY!" All of the other mammals froze in place at Nick's outburst. "I am sick and tired of being used as everyone's punching bag! Now, can we all just calm down and work this out like civilized animals?" They stared at him in silence, thinking it over.

Next thing he knew, Felix grabbed him by his left leg, Carla his right, and Boomer both of his arms, now pulling him back and forth in three separate directions. "You suck. You guys suck. Just want you to know that."

The impromptu game of Tug of War was interrupted by the sound of wailing police sirens. Looking back at the road behind them, they saw three more patrol cars heading their way, local cops from Precinct 4.

"Hey, don't worry, guys! We've got this completely under control!" yelled Nick, still being hoisted by his assailants.

"Screw this." Felix abruptly dropped Nick's leg and pulled out his gun once more, pointing the weapon at all of the mammals in front of him. "In case of a tie, victory goes to the guy with the loaded weapon. Any objections?"

Fangs, Boomer, and Carla glared at him, but didn't budge.

"Good." He suddenly whirled around and shot a bullet into the shoulder of Koslov. The polar bear reeled back in shock and pain, causing the plow and its passengers to veer into the partition.

"Are ya' trying to kill us all, ya sodding ratbag?!" Boomer spat.

"I'm not trying to kill  _any_ of you," Felix corrected, grabbing Nick and draping the protesting fox over his shoulder. "But Wilde is the only one I'm here for. The rest of you are inconsequential." In one swift motion, he leapt from the roof onto Fenrir and used his claws to slash apart the tow rope. "Happy trails." He slammed on the gas and sped off down the turnpike.

Boomer clenched his paws tightly. "Let's get after 'im, Fangs."

"Excuse me?" the dingo asked before suddenly being thrown onto the roo's back. Boomer barely gave him time to hold on before leaping from the roof and onto another car, then another, and another.

"This is getting very tiresome," Ignoring the pain in his paw and shoulder, Koslov dropped the patrol car like a piece of rubbish and rammed into it just out of spite as he gave chase.

Without anything to keep it going, the car came to a stop, allowing Carla to safely climb back inside. "I should probably explain this to the local cops." She glanced back at the approaching police vehicles, then over to where the action was. "Nah."

She promptly floored it.

* * *

_Derby Arena_

_6: 14 PM_

"Ahahahahaha! Not so high and mighty now, are we?!" Junior mocked, his laughter several leagues louder than necessary.

Jimmy remained quiet, his eyes pointed down at the flattened form of Wallace, what was left of his gift from Nick Wilde himself. He knew this was his own fault for letting the duel go on for so long, he didn't need to be told that much.

He'd heard it all before.

_Jimmy Frost groaned, pushing a wet towel to his new black eye. The arctic fox sat unsteadily on the bleachers, holding still as best he could while the squirrel medic looked him over._

" _Just keep pressure on it for a while and the swelling should go down," she advised, looking at him with a mix of sympathy and pity, a look he was getting very used to._

" _Thanks," he smiled, kicking his legs over the edge of the bleachers. "So when will I be able to go back in again?"_

_The squirrel paused, taken aback by his question. "W-Well, I would give it at least a few days before you-"_

_"Frost!"_

_The imposing figure of Major Ursula Friedkin, the ZPD's academy instructor, stormed over to him, frightening the squirrel off instantly. Jimmy sat upright and saluted purely out of instinct. "Yes, ma'am?"_

" _I see you lost again," the polar said, frowning._

" _Yeah, kinda," he admitted sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck. "I guess I'm not ready to go up against rhinos yet."_

" _Officer Hopps went up against a rhino and won in less than a minute," Ursula countered. "That's not why you lost."_

_Jimmy quirked his head, confused. "What do you mean?"_

" _Do you want to know what I saw up there?" she asked, crossing her arms. "I saw some scrawny little kid trying to take on a guy ten times his size, HEAD-ON, and smiling like he doesn't have a damn care in the world."_

_He shrugged. "Well, it's just a sparring match. In a real fight-"_

" _In a REAL FIGHT, you would have been slaughtered! This isn't all fun and games, Frost! The lives of mammals all across Zootopia are going to depend on your conduct as an officer!"_

" _But I was brave, wasn't I? That big ol' rhino didn't scare me."_

" _That's the problem," she said, lowering her head to glare at him. "NOTHING scares you! Nothing phases you at all! Ever since you got here, I don't think I've ever ONCE seen you take any of this seriously! To be honest...I'm not even sure if you really want to be a police officer."_

_He tried his best to avoid her gaze, but that giant head was hard to see around. "I-It's not like that. I'm acing most of my tests because I studied my tail off to learn."_

" _It's not just about the knowledge, it's about the attitude," Ursula insisted. "If you go into duty being this lackadaisy about danger, then you'll be brave, you'll be determined, and most importantly, YOU'LL BE DEAD!"_

_Jimmy was blown back a bit from the sheer force of her shout. "...That would be bad, yes."_

" _What you lack is motivation. Take a look up there." She pointed up to the boxing ring, where a tiger was now squaring off with a hyena, the latter giving him no mercy as she pounded away at him. "THAT is what motivation looks like. Hyenandez up there has made her passion for the job clear from day one."_

" _She looks a bit_ too _motivated if you ask me," Jimmy said nervously, hoping the hyena didn't hear him._

" _Indeed. That one could do with a bit more technique. Should you both manage to graduate, I'll recommend they put you on the same unit to balance each other out."_

_His eyes widened. "Wait, what?"_

" _But nevermind that!" she said, looking back at him. "Unless I see some real commitment out of you, I can't in good conscience let you pass. There must be something that can motivate you. What brought you to the academy in the first place?"_

_Almost subconsciously, Jimmy glanced over to the left, across several rows of bleachers, until his eyes landed on cadet Nick Wilde. The older fox didn't look back. In fact, he seemed to be paying attention to literally anything except his fellow classmates. Nevertheless, he couldn't help but smile._

" _Wilde, huh?" Ursula asked, following his gaze. "I figured a guy like him would attract fans sooner or later. Not often a fox signs up for a job like this, let alone two. But let me tell you something." She leaned down to his level, resting a paw on his shoulder. "He's got the drive to be a cop, I can tell that much already."_

" _What drives_ him _, then?" He was almost embarrassed that he didn't know already._

" _I'm not sure," she admitted. "He's very selective about his past, that one." She jabbed him in the chest and smiled. "So if you want to find out, I suggest you make that_  your _drive. Whenever you need that extra spark of motivation, just think of Wilde, okay?"_

_Just think of Wilde? Who knew it could be so easy? Jimmy ginned. "Yes, ma'am."_

Jimmy revved up his engines. "Yes, ma'am."

" _Hoo boy, I'm sensin' a resolution!"_ Danger Dan announced.

Had Junior stopped laughing in a reasonable amount of time, he might have noticed the Motorsicle suddenly charging across the arena straight towards him. The wolf was cut off mid-mock by the bike ramming hard into the side of the Cerberus, carrying so much momentum that it nearly threw him off completely. "H-Hey! What's tha big idea?!"

"You murdered Wallace!" Jimmy snarled hatefully.

"Whoa, now hold on!" said Junior, unnerved by the fox's sudden change in demeanor. "Ya can't be this bent out of shape over some dumb plushie! Just chill!"

"I'm  _always_  chill!" Without warning, Jimmy charged again, hitting Junior's other side. "That's all I am, the eager kid all smiley and cheerful no matter what happens!" Swerving to avoid a panicked flamethrower shot, Jimmy rammed Junior again. "But this isn't  _about me_  anymore!" He hit the front of the Cerberus at such an angle to send it spinning out of control. "Nick Wilde trusted me with that Wallabeanie and you ruined it!" He rammed in head-on one last time, pushing the off-balance bike straight into the wall of the arena. "So in his name, I'm gonna kick your smug, hillbilly ass!"

" _...Folks, I'm not rightly sure what's goin' on here, but it sure is fun!"_

There was no response from the crowd, all too stunned into silence to say a word. Judy and Grizzoli stared wide-eyed at the scene in front of them, wondering who this fox was and what he had done with Jimmy Frost.

"THAT! IS! IT!" A heavily-battered Junior pulled himself from the wall and spun around to face Jimmy, seething in rage. "I have had it with ya makin' a fool outta me!"

"You didn't need any help there," Jimmy said dryly.

"You think yer so clever, let's see ya dodge  _this!_ " The Cerberus stared down the Motorsicle, its twin flamethrowers gearing up for a final assault. "GrrrrrrRRRRRrrrrrRRRRRrrrrrRRRRRRRR!"

It took him a moment to realize no flames were coming out. "RRRRrrrrrrrrrrr-" he broke off, sputtering and wheezing. "What the heck?!"

Jimmy casually pointed to the flamethrowers, both now covered in a thick coating of ice. "I knew I'd never be able to take on a bike that size in a straight-up fight, so while I distracted you with all that ramming, I took the time to disable your weapons."

Junior tried a few more times to shoot some fire, but no dice, just ice. "Oh, you connivin' little sonofabitch." He kicked the side of the bike in annoyance. "Fine! I don't need any fire! I'll just take ya down all physical-like! You already admitted that yer puny bike can't beat mine!"

"Actually…" Jimmy grinned, "it already has."

"Huh?" He suddenly noticed an unsettling noise coming from his frozen flamethrowers, now ruptured from the extreme cold.

"Yeah, probably shouldn't have tried so hard to ignite those. Guess you never paid attention in science class when they taught you about thermodynamics."

"Thermadywhatsit?"

Jimmy waved at him. "Junior go boom now."

"Like  _hell_  I'm-!"

The Cerberus exploded, sending Junior flying several feet into the air, screaming like a little girl, until he landed with a pronounced thud, forming his own little crater in the ground as pieces of the bike landed around him. "Now that...that ain't right…"

Danger Dan almost dropped his megaphone in excitement. " _I can't believe it! We have a new derby champion! Give it up for, uh, dang never learned his name...Ice Guy!"_

"Ice Guy, Ice Guy, Ice Guy!" the crowd chanted.

Now covered in a layer of soot, the tip of his tail on fire, Jimmy grinned over at Judy and Grizzoli, who both looked like they had just barely staved off heart attacks. "See? That wasn't so bad."

Judy fainted.

* * *

_Torrential Turnpike_

_6: 23 PM_

"They just don't know when to quit, do they?" Felix turned his head back and snarled at his pursuers. Koslov was still coming at him in the snow truck, his plow tilted upward to scoop up Nick and nothing else, Carla Hyenandez was back in control of her police car, undergoing severe road rage, while Boomer was hopping from car to car to reach him, Fangs clinging desperately to his back while swearing profusely. Behind all of them, the ZPD was just trying to stay relevant.

"They're not the ones you have to worry about." While Felix was looking behind him, Nick suddenly punched him in the eye and jumped out of his grasp.

"What do you think you're doing?!" Felix asked, trying to keep control over both fox and Fenrir. "There's nowhere to escape to, you moron!"

"Maybe not," Nick said, balancing awkwardly on the handlebars. "But I've survived on the streets for most of my life. This is just a slightly bigger street, with a lot more cars on it, passing by at a very high velocity, and the metaphor is getting a bit muddled now, but the point is it doesn't have  _you_ in it!"

He threw a punch at the wolf's face that he turned his head to avoid. The sudden movement made Fenrir curve slightly to the left, bouncing off of a car, while Felix countered with a swipe of his claws. Nick dodged backwards and fell onto the hood of the bike, hanging on with pretty much nothing but his own stubbornness to survive. He caught sight of the disturbingly lifelike wolf skull attached to the front, and as Felix made another swipe for him, he kicked the wolf's arm into the mouth of the skull.

Felix screamed, his arm lacerated by the hood ornament as he pulled it out. Unfortunately for both of them, this brief diversion allowed their pursuers to catch up.

"Get 'im, mate!" Fangs screamed. "Please get 'im so we can go home already!" Boomer bounced from another car, kicked off against the side of a truck, and launched himself at Fenrir.

"PISS OFF!" Both Nick and Felix shouted, simultaneously kicking the airborne kangaroo as he leapt at them. Fangs and Boomer were thrown away from the bike, landing in the bed of Koslov's snow plow. The polar bear glared down at the two Outbackers, wondering if he would be punished for dropping them.

"Outta my way!" With some amount of difficulty, Carla bashed the patrol car into the truck until she was able to get by. "I'm the only one who gets to put Wilde in his place!" Driving up behind Fenrir, Carla pressed herself against the wheel, baring her teeth as she bore down on them.

"Does she realize that if she runs us down she'll kill us both?!" Felix shouted, holding down Nick with one paw.

"I'm pretty sure she does, yes," Nick answered calmly.

Felix paused for a moment, considering his options. "Stay here."

Nick was under the impression that  _he_ was the reckless one, but after seeing Felix suddenly leap off of the bike, he reconsidered holding onto that title. With little other choice, Nick frantically hopped into the driver's seat and tried to take control of the vehicle.

As for Carla, the last thing the hot-headed hyena expected was for anyone she was chasing to come after her instead. The sheer momentum easily carried Felix right to the hood of the car, punching a hole directly through the windshield and into her face. Carla fell back against her seat, knocked out in an instant. Frowning at the inconvenience this had caused him, Felix jumped back onto Fenrir just as Nick was about to drive it out of there, placing his paws directly over Nick's and easily arresting control.

But this wasn't Nick's primary concern anymore. "C-Carla!" Without a conscious driver, the patrol car came to a sudden stop. Not prepared for this, Koslov's truck hit it head-on, Fangs and Boomer being thrown back through the windshield as the force sent the entire truck tipping over onto its side. The large vehicle created a barricade right in the middle of the turnpike, blocking off access to the ZPD, or anyone else for the next few hours.

"Uh...smell the skunky fox?" He awkwardly pressed himself up against Felix.

"Let me tell you a little something, Wilde," the wolf said from behind him. "I have mastered seven different lupine martial arts, survived multiple life-threatening injuries, and learned exotic torture techniques for any mammal in existence." He narrowed his eyes. "But first and foremost, I am a loyal son to Lady Lang, and you will  _not_ defy her!" Nick could not resist any further, as Felix reared his head back and brought it forward, sharply headbutting him into unconsciousness.

"Hmph." Leaving the chaos behind him, Felix drove Fenrir up to the toll booth to exit the turnpike. Ignoring the petrified lioness that stood guard, Felix pulled out his wallet and searched through it.

"...Do you have change for a twenty?"

* * *

_Derby Arena_

_6: 31 PM_

"I...I didn't want it to end like this. I'm sorry I couldn't save you." Jimmy bent over the "corpse" of Wallace, slowly prying the plushie out of its crater. "Rest in peace."

"You know it's made of cotton, right?" Grizzoli asked, coming up behind him. "Pretty sure you could just re-stuff it or something."

Jimmy looked up at him hopefully, wiping a tear from his eye. "You mean...he's still alive?"

Grizzoli wasn't sure how to answer that.

"Don't you  _ever_ scare me like that again!" said Judy, wrapping herself tightly around Jimmy's waist. "Why are you foxes all so dumb?!"

"Urrggh…" Her ears perked up at the low groan, barely audible over the excitement of the crowd. Pulling on Jimmy's shirt, she gestured over to the sputtering, prone form of Junior.

"Right," he nodded. Leaving them to deal with the crowd, Jimmy got up and headed over to the beaten wolf. He didn't know how he would react now, but there was still something they needed.

Junior looked up at him wearily, his eyes flickering as a small smile formed on his muzzle. "Not...not bad, squirt…" he coughed. "I'm more messed up...than a near-sighted giraffe...under an eighteen-wheeler..."

"Sorry. I might have been a bit  _too_ motivated."

"Ya think?" Junior muttered. "But ya won fair and square, I can't deny that. I just want ya to promise me somethin' first." He grabbed onto the fox's arm. "Please...promise me you'll protect our momma," he pleaded. "She's all we got."

"What do you mean?" he asked. "Don't you have any other family?"

He turned his head to the left, glancing at the wolf skull that had fallen from his bike. "Fraid' not. Our parents were a pair of drunk idiots who gave me 'n Felix the same damn name. Can't say I much appreciate either one of them. The day Lady Lang had them killed was the happiest day of my life."

"Then Lady Lang isn't your real mother?"

"She ain't  _anyone's_  real mother," he said softly. "There's not a single one of us that's related to her by blood. But ya know what? She's more of a family than we've  _ever_  had. That's how the Lang Family was formed. We're just a bunch of lost pups who were in need of a momma…"

Jimmy nodded slowly. "I promise. I promise I'll keep her safe."

"Glad ta hear it," he said, almost laughing. "3157 Wolfsbane Lane. Momma moves around a lot, but that's where she's at right now." He suddenly yanked his paw away from Jimmy's grip. "Now quit it with all this touchy-feely crap before I yarf!"

"Thanks," Jimmy smiled warmly, ignoring him completely to give him a small hug. Junior groaned in confused disgust and passed out.

"Don't worry, he'll be fine!" Timber shouted from across the arena. "Ya should've seen him after last year's finals!"

Reassured, Jimmy pulled out his phone to give Nick the good news.

" _Hey, I'm still alive! Also, I won! :D"_

He waited a few moments, but didn't get a response. "...Uh oh."

* * *

_Off The Beaten Path_

_6: 42 PM_

Felix drove for quite some time before he was sure he finally lost his pursuers. Still driving Nick driving Fenrir, he took the time to pull over into the concealment of some trees to get situated. This quiet suburban area was a refreshing change of pace from what he had just been through. He didn't know  _why_  Miss Lang wanted the fox so badly, but he sure hoped it was worth it.

Casually tossing Nick over the bike, Felix went about searching his pockets for anything he might use to try something clever. He'd had about enough of that for one night.

He was almost disappointed by how little he found. "Unbelievable. No weapon, no police radio, not even a phone. What kind of lousy cop  _are_ you?" The unconscious fox just lay there, his tongue hanging out of his mouth. "It doesn't matter. I won't question Miss Lang's motives. Hang on tight."

Felix wordlessly hopped back on to the bike, threw Nick over his shoulder, and headed for home.

* * *

_Derby Arena_

_6: 42 PM_

Still no response. Jimmy watched the phone anxiously, his paw quivering. Had something happened to Nick? He knew he should've taken those earlier texts more seriously. Thinking about Nick had clearly not helped in that instance.

A sudden chime made him jump.

" _R u ok?"_

Jimmy released a breath he didn't know he was holding. Nick must have taken care of whatever problem he was facing. He should've known better than to doubt his mentor.

" _Nick, I won! I actually won! Can you believe it?!"_

" _Whoa, tht's g8, kid! Then u know whre Lang is?"_

" _Sure do! She's at 3157 Wolfsbane Lane! Let's meet up there, ok?"_

It took a few moments longer to get another response.

" _No prob, kid. I'll b thre in no time."_

" _Sweet! Man, I can't wait to tell you about what I've just been through! It was one crazy night!"_

" _Crazy like a fox?"_

" _Yeah, it was really"_

Jimmy stopped typing, his claw hovering over the keypad. Weird. He could've sworn that exact phrase had come up somewhere before. Didn't Nick mention something about it back at the hospital? Something about him, and that phrase...

_Oh crap. Oh crap oh crap OH CRAP!_

"JUDY!"

The bunny was in the middle of a conversation with Timber when the arctic fox rushed by, grabbing her by the ear as he passed. "Agh! Jimmy, what's wrong?!"

"We need to get to Lang  _now!_  She's in danger!"

"What?!"

Grizzoli, hearing the commotion, followed the two smaller officers outside the tent as Jimmy rushed straight for his car. "Hey, that's  _my_ ride!"

"Then get in! We need to go!"

"Jimmy, what is this about?" Judy asked worriedly, willing to forgive the ear-pulling for now.

Before he could say anything, Grizzoli screamed in horror. "Who did this to my car?!" The patrol car seemed to be fine on first glance, but closer inspection quickly revealed that all four of its tires had been slashed. "I knew we couldn't trust those damn wolves! Just wait until I get my paws on them!"

"Wait! It wasn't them!" yelled Jimmy. "I think it was the Count's goons! He knows where we are, and now he knows where Lang is!"

"Jimmy, I understand that you're worried, but how could he know  _any_  of that?" Judy asked doubtfully.

Jimmy looked down dejectedly, the weight of his actions crashing into him harder than Junior ever could. "Because...because I think I told him."

He didn't know how Judy and Grizzoli reacted, not willing to look at them to find out. How could he have been so stupid? He just made a promise to those wolves, and now...and now…

_What have I done?_

* * *

_3157 Wolfsbane Lane_

_The Wolf's Den_

_7: 04 PM_

Felix knew something was wrong the instant he pulled up to the giant, curled tree that housed Lady Lang. The location was known to very few members of the pack, so then why were there so many vehicles parked outside?

His grip tightened around the handlebars as he recognized the pitch black color of the vehicles from the skirmish he had just come out of. There were a pair of SUV's parked haphazardly in front of the tree, but much more striking was a long, black limousine, elegant despite the huge dent in its side. With his strong night vision, he could even make out the license plate, though its lettering confused him: CZYLKFX

His nose twitched, picking up the distinct smell of blood.

"Miss Lang!" Throwing Nick to the ground like an afterthought, Felix rushed straight into the hideout. He didn't need his nose to tell what had happened here. Strewn all over the white hallway were the bodies of Lady Lang's personal bodyguards. Felix forced himself to ignore them and keep going. He could mourn for his lost brethren later, once he ensured that Lang was safe.

In a matter of seconds, he cleared the hallway and kicked open the double doors into Lang's dark office, letting them close behind him. His eyes immediately searched for the white wolf, and to his great relief, saw her standing in front of the large window that overlooked the district. She did not look so relieved, her expression shifting into terror upon seeing him. "Felix, no! Get out of here!"

Only now did Felix register the other mammals in the room. There were several black-suited thugs lining the sides, looking at him in shock and apprehension, along with a raccoon in an aviator jacket who only looked annoyed. But he was more focused on the mammal standing directly in front of Lang, a medium-sized creature holding some kind of cane who hadn't even bothered to turn around. "Who are you?!" Felix demanded.

The figure looked over his shoulder at him, the light from the window illuminating a red-furred face, graying around the muzzle with age, piercing green eyes behind a pair of devil-rimmed glasses, and a sly, sinister smirk.

_"Take a Wilde guess."_

The aged fox chuckled, twirling the long cane in his paws as he turned around completely. He wore a prim black suit just like his henchmammals, with a blue plaid shirt underneath and a purple tie. His paws were clasped over the cane's headpiece, an effigy of a madly grinning fox head. His resemblance to the fox Felix had just carried here was unmistakable. Perhaps he should've just killed him after all.

"You leave my son out of this, John!" Lady Lang growled, catching his attention once more. She shot a warning glare at Felix, telling him to stay put.

"No one's called me  _that_ in ages, Annie," the fox said. "These days I go by Count Reynard."

She snorted, unimpressed. "Sounds about as clever as that 'Suitropolis' of yours."

"It was called  _Suitopia!"_ he snapped indignantly. "Honestly, who would waste a perfectly good pun like that?" He gestured a paw towards his suited thugs. "And as you can see, I never let my assets go to waste. Guess you could say my organization is 'tailor-made' for duty, eh?"

Lang just glared at him.

Reynard frowned. "Fine. Don't laugh. Just trying to lighten the mood." He leaned forward on the cane and rested his chin on top of the headpiece, mirroring its expression perfectly. "So...bet you're wondering how I found you."

"I really don't give a damn, no."

"It wasn't easy, I'll give you that much," he continued anyway. "You and your boys did an insufferably good job of keeping us guessing, even with Firecracker on the case. Hiding yourself this well in the technological age is a pretty admirable feat. But the thing about technology? We get too  _reliant_  on it. So reliant, in fact…" He reached into his pocket and pulled out a phone. "...that we don't even notice when it suddenly goes missing."

"So you stole someone's phone. I truly see the depths of your brilliance."

"Oh, I  _wish_ it was that simple!" he laughed. "Impersonating my son's text lingo was like learning a whole new language." He looked at the phone distastefully. "Such an archaic model too. I'll have to buy him a better one. Probably make a better gift than just sending him another cake."

Felix had heard enough. Snarling in fury, he charged across the room faster than any of the thugs could react and made a slash for Count Reynard. The old fox spun out of the way with a speed unnatural for someone his age, letting Felix slip right past him. The wolf stumbled only slightly and quickly whirled around, reaching for his gun.

He couldn't find it.

"Looking for this?" Reynard casually held up the stolen weapon. "You should really be careful with these things. There's a reason this kind of gun was officially banned from Zootopia, you know. Here, let me demonstrate it."

With all the emotion of someone mowing the lawn, he pointed the gun at Lady Lang and fired.

"MOTHER!" Felix threw himself in front of the gun, taking the bullet and falling to the floor.

"N-No!" Lang crouched down and cradled the large wolf. He was alive, but injured, blood pooling between his claws as he clutched at the wound. "Damn it, Felix, why couldn't you just listen to me?!" she sobbed.

"I...I'm sorry..."

"Okay, whoever was in the betting pool for one of these guys throwing themselves in front of her, you just won! Congrats!" Reynard announced cheerfully.

"You bastard!" Lang snarled, still holding Felix's head. "He didn't deserve this!"

"Really?" he asked, glaring back at her. "I don't know, it seems like real poetic justice after the way you threw  _my_ son under the bus."

"T-That wasn't-"

"This guy kinda reminds me of him actually," Reynard said, looking Felix up and down. "Bold, determined, so eager to get down to business. Species aside, there's really only one discernible difference between your boy and mine." He pointed the gun directly at Felix's skull. " _Mine_ has a future."

"Wait!" she cried desperately, shielding Felix despite how clearly illogical that action was. "Please! You can do what you want with me, just leave my children alone!"

"Yikes, you would make a  _terrible_ con-artist," he remarked, shaking his head. "Don't put all of your cards on the table, Moonshine. What could you offer me in return that I don't already have?"

"My pack."

Reynard paused. "...I'm listening."

"You know how loyal my children are. If you kill me, they'll never listen to you," Lang said. " _Unless_ I tell them to."

"And you would do this?" Reynard asked skeptically.

"I would rather them work for a monster than be killed by one," she hissed.

"Fine with me." He gripped one of the ears of his fox cane. "I'll just need you to give your boys a little message."

"No...don't…" Felix pleaded.

"Be quiet," she said firmly.

Reynard twisted the ear, which made an audible click as he lowered it down to her muzzle.

Lang closed her eyes, trying to stay composed. It was a good thing she had been prepared for a similar situation already. At least this way she got to say goodbye. "My children...I'm afraid I must tell you that I can no longer be your mother." That statement alone nearly broke her, but she forced herself to keep talking. "Instead...I must ask something very serious of you. As of today, you are all now under the control of the crime lord, Count Reynard. I beg of you, please do not resist. I don't want to lose any more of you. This is my final wish to keep you all safe." Against her will, she started to choke up. "Just remember...that I will always lo-"

There was another click and the ear snapped back into its original position. "Oh right, it only records for a minute," Reynard noted. Lang glared viciously at him. "What? I said to give them a  _little_ message, didn't I? That will do." He put the end of the cane under her chin, motioning for her to get up.

"Mother…" Felix tried to stop her, but the exertion finally proved too much for his injured state and he passed out. Lang saw that as a mercy.

"You care deeply about your family, as do I," Reynard said darkly, pressing Lang against the window with his cane. "Then you understand why I am doing this.  _Nobody_ wrongs my son and gets away with it. Not Big, not Thornbush, not  _any_ of you. On my honor, Nicholas Piberius Wilde is going to be the greatest criminal the world has ever seen."

"Is that so?" Lang asked smugly. If she was going down, she was going to make it  _hurt_. "From what I hear, that doesn't seem to be his agenda anymore. Looks like you came back too late, John."

Several of the Count's minions gasped, backing away. Even Simon was visibly on-edge.

Reynard's eyes narrowed murderously, his cane trembling with rage. But just as quickly, that rage disappeared, fading into a low shimmer. His head tilted up to the left, almost smiling. "...Look, it's the moon."

Lang knew where this was going, but looked anyway. Indeed, the full moon had risen high above the Rainforest District. She couldn't help but smile. As far as last sights went, you could do worse.

Reynard lifted his leg. "Now  _howl._ "

His kick hit her square in the chest, the force shattering the window as the wolf was knocked through it. Lady Lang's final scream rippled through the canopy, echoing far and wide before coming to a sudden stop. Count Reynard pulled out a small list from his front pocket and crossed off the third name.

~~_Big_ ~~

~~_Thornbrush_ ~~

~~_Lang_ ~~

_Sanchez_

_Narwhalter_

"It's called a hustle, sweetheart."

"What do we do with  _him?_ " asked Simon, pointing to the unconscious Felix.

Reynard pretended to give it serious thought. "Hmm...I believe Lang's deal was contingent on the pack agreeing to it, yes?"

"I believe so."

"And it didn't really seem like he agreed, now did it?"

"It did not."

"So how about we toss him too?"

"Toss him too?"

"Toss him too."

With the assistance of a bulky rhino, Simon chucked the wolf through the gaping hole after his mother. Reynard vaguely hoped he would land on her.

He turned around and straightened his tie. "Boys, scour every inch of this place for anything of use, then have Sparky burn it to the ground. I have other business to attend to." The thugs nodded in affirmation and set to work tearing the office apart while the Count watched with Simon. "All in all, I'd say that went pretty well." Reynard smiled, holding his cane behind his back. "That recording from Lang should help keep the other dogs in line while we take control of her resources and move on to the next target."

"What about your son?"

"Oh, I wouldn't worry about him. Nicholas is a tough cookie. It'll take a lot more than a little chase along the freeway to shake  _him_ up."

His nose twitched, suddenly picking up a smell even more unpleasant than blood. Reynard turned towards the office doors, now creaked open just slightly wider than he remembered them.

On the other side, Nick Wilde backed away slowly, eyes wide and paws trembling.

Then he turned and ran like hell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nice theory about the Count having a vendetta against you, Nick. Completely and utterly wrong, but nice.
> 
> ...
> 
> Okay, we know a few of you figured it out already. Shoutouts to thisisalongname, Cimar of Turalis WildeHopps, and Baneblade for being crazy like a fox. And for those who didn't?
> 
> We huuuuustled yoooooou! We hustled you GOOD! :D
> 
> (Here's a fun experiment. Try re-reading the first scene of the first chapter and see how obvious it is now.)
> 
> Count Reynard belongs to me (well, sorta). His design is based on John Wilde from the old concept art and this particular version of him was based around one simple question: What would Nick have grown up into had he never changed his conniving ways? And yes, this makes Reynard the polar opposite (pun intended) of Jimmy Frost. Who better for him to royally screw with over the course of this arc?
> 
> Shoutout to AnotherTerribleAuthor for inadvertently giving us that phone-stealing idea. You know who you are.
> 
> Yes, we know that fight scene on the freeway alone broke several laws of physics. We write our action scenes mostly on Rule of Cool. And sometimes Rule of Funny. But now you know our headcanon on regular guns in Zootopia. They exist, but they're relatively rare, and thus taken more seriously.
> 
> Needless to say, we have been waiting a long, long, long time to officially introduce Count Reynard into the story. We promise you, things are only going to get more interesting from here, as this story was made to be Nick vs. his criminal father first, everything else second. But this is not the end of the arc just yet. There's still one more chapter to go first.


	15. Parental Guidance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That hiatus was a bit longer than expected, but we're back in the groove now. To make up for the wait, we have a few announcements to make:
> 
> First of all, Born to Be Wilde now has a TV Tropes page! So if, like us, you enjoy categorizing stories into neat little boxes, we would appreciate all the help we can get in bringing this thing to life.
> 
> Second of all, you guys know "When Instinct Falls" right? It's only one of the biggest fics on this site (in every sense of the word). Well, after a recent collaboration on "One Hundred Kisses" (another great fic), Upplet, Mind Jack, and myself came up with the idea for some bonus chapters involving Lucy Sang. So if you're not reading that behemoth already, we recommend you look into it. We may not write WildeHopps, but that fic does it very well.
> 
> Lastly, we would like to extend a shoutout to our second beta reader, Darkflamewolf! As it so happens, I am also her beta on "Death Becomes You", which I recommend as well. It's dark, but it's good dark, and also involves evil vampire bats. Apparently, that's become a thing in this fandom. XD
> 
> So now that we've just shamelessly plugged a bunch of fics that aren't this one, let's wrap up another arc, shall we?

****

**Chapter 15: Parental Guidance**

_Rainforest District_

_Outside the Derby_

_7: 13 PM_

"No, I said  _Lady_ Lang!" Judy yelled into the police transceiver. "Yes, the crime lord. Wait, don't hang up on-!" The rabbit growled in frustration and slammed the radio back onto the dashboard. "Can you believe that Precinct 4 doesn't care what happens to Lang?!"

Grizzoli shrugged. "Uh...yeah, kinda."

"Whatdowedowhatdowedowhatdowedo?" Jimmy clutched his skull and muttered to himself, pacing back and forth across the muddy ground. "How could I  _do_ something like that?! My mom always told me not to talk to strangers! I mean, I didn't  _think_ it was a stranger, but the principle is the same!"

"As I  _keep_  suggesting, if we want to get to Lang, why don't we just ask the wolves for a lift?" Grizzoli pointed back into the tent, where the oblivious canines were still riding the night away.

"We can't!" Jimmy insisted.

"Why not?"

"Because then we would have to explain why we can't get there ourselves, and then they would ask how our tires got slashed, and then they would ask how the Count's guys found us, and then they would ask how I could betray them all, and I don't have an answer to that!" Jimmy explained rapidly, trembling as he spoke.

"Jimmy, it's okay," Judy said as softly as she could.

"No it's not!" he snapped back. "I screwed up! I made a promise to Junior and then immediately turned around and threw it in his face! Now Lady Lang is in terrible danger and it's all my fault! They'd never forgive me!" The arctic fox looked down, tears welling up in the corners of his eyes. "I don't even think I can forgive  _myself_ …"

Judy and Grizzoli watched him, unsure how to approach this situation. It pained the bunny to see any mammal in this much pain, let alone the team puppy dog. "Jimmy...I-"

Judy's ears stood up as a loud, piercing yell cut through the air. It came from a fair distance away, but was distinct enough to be picked up far throughout the district. "What was that?" Grizzoli asked, tilting his head towards the sound.

"That was a scream…" Jimmy said slowly. "A  _female_ scream."

As if just to prove him right, a dozen howls suddenly arose from all around them, the entire Rainforest District becoming a lupine cacophony. Most came from inside the tent, quickly followed by the sounds of several revving motors as biker wolves tore out of the derby one by one. The ZPD officers could do nothing but stare as the bikes sped straight past them. At the head was Timber, carrying the injured Junior over his shoulder. Not one of the wolves so much as looked at them.

It didn't take long after that for the full impact to sink in.

"No…no!" The arctic fox fell to his knees and planted his head to the ground. "I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!"

Judy almost tried to talk to him again, but Grizzoli put a paw on her shoulder to stop her. As she watched Jimmy sob uncontrollably and continue screaming apologies at no one in particular, she knew this wasn't going to be fixed with something as simple as words.

* * *

_3157 Wolfsbane Lane_

_7: 33 PM_

" _As of today, you are all now under the control of the crime lord, Count Reynard. I beg of you, please do not resist. This is my final wish to keep you safe. Just remember...that I will always lo-"_

With a prominent click, the mouth of the fox cane closed, no more sound coming out of it. "Now wasn't that sweet?" Reynard asked, looking out at the assembled crowd of nearly the entire Lang Family standing before him.

"What the hell have ya done to our mother?!" Timber snarled, advancing on the fox threateningly. The other wolves shared the sentiment, slowly surrounding him.

Simon VanDal, leaning against the side of one of the SUV's, prepared to step in, but Reynard just raised an eyebrow in response to the approaching wolves. "Is that a rhetorical question or do you actually want a play-by-play analysis? Personally, I thought it was kind of self-evident."

Timber grabbed Reynard by the tie and pulled him up to his teeth-bared muzzle. The fox looked down at his tie, mildly annoyed that it was getting mucked up by these grimy paws. "You've messed with the wrong pack, you son of a bitch! We're gonna-"

"Yeah, you're not gonna do a thing to me actually," Reynard interrupted, casually raising a finger.

"Really? Care ta explain why?" he growled. "Cause' regardless of what that doohickey just said, I think our mom would be a lot happier if we just ripped ya to shreds right now. Isn't that right, boys?" The other wolves shouted in agreement, already closing in for a good old-fashioned mauling.

"Uh...sir?" Simon pressed. He wasn't exactly nervous, but definitely concerned. Was the Count  _trying_ to get himself killed?

"Relax, Peggy, just doing business," Reynard called back. "It seems this crowd is a bit slow on the uptake."

At this point, Simon decided that no force on Earth was going to save him from lupine wrath, so he would just sit back and enjoy the show.

Timber raised his claws to strike. "I'm gonna tear out that silver tongue of yers, ya lowlife, scumsucking-!"

"Sure, go ahead."

Timber was so caught off-guard by this response that it stopped him mid-swing. "...What?"

"Go ahead. Tear out my tongue, or my throat, or my lungs, or whatever organ of your preference," Reynard said, pulling his tie out of Timber's loosened grip. "But before you do, you should perhaps consider the consequences."

"Consequences?"

"That's right." He straightened his tie before leaning back onto the cane. "Tell me if this story sounds real to you. Say you  _do_ decide to kill me and avenge your dearly departed mother only to find,  _whoopsie_ , you just ticked off the rest of my criminal empire, who may not necessarily care about  _me,_ but most certainly care about the power and influence that I bring them. Also money."

Reynard checked his claws, seemingly oblivious to the still-advancing wolves. "Now, let's say that you guys actually manage to come out on top.  _Double whoopsie_ , in addition to whatever casualties you've just sustained, you've also lost the legal protection that allowed you to run rampant around this district and the ZPD comes down on your collective ass like, and I hope you appreciate this metaphor, a pack of ravenous wolves."

The wolves continued forward, but with noticeably less vigor than before. "So by this point, most of you are either dead, injured, or incarcerated, leaving the remainder free to go wherever they may. Except  _whoopsie number three-sy,_ you don't  _have_ anywhere else to go! And soon enough, you're reduced to digging through trash and living under your overturned bikes just to keep the ZPD, or anyone else who has a bone to pick with you, from hunting you down and throwing you all off the nearest bridge. And the  _best part_ is that all of it could have been avoided had you simply done exactly what your mother wanted you to in the first place." Reynard turned towards the crowd, now frozen in place only a few feet from him. "That sound about right?"

No one said a word. Nearly the entire pack had their tails lowered and their heads bowed, a clear sign of submission. Simon watched all of this with a fascinated awe.  _How...how did he_ do _that?_

Reynard tapped his cane on the ground to get the pack's attention. "Now that we've got  _that_ settled, allow me to explain your new arrangements." He lifted the cane towards the tree that was once Lady Lang's former abode. On cue, several suited thugs emerged, each carrying stacks of important documents and equipment. Reynard slowly walked out from between the crowd, allowing them to quickly move out of his way. "I have control over all your resources now, which means that if you want to keep having your little hootenannies, you're going to do what I say."

"And you'll stop torching our hideouts?" Timber asked bitterly.

He stopped and turned around, facing towards them again. "Weeeeell…" The tree suddenly went up in flames, a gleeful skunk watching it burn from the sidelines. "...yes. Starting now, we'll stop torching your hideouts." He looked over at his henchmammals curiously. "Now, I believe we had a new recruit to introduce?"

"He's running late, sir," said a suited wombat.

He sighed, pressing his glasses to his face. "That's fine, I suppose. We can work on tardiness protocol later." His head turned at the sound of an incoming motor. "Ah, speak of the devil. Alright, dogs, meet your new supervisor!"

To the wolves' horror, another bike pulled up in front of them and off stepped a familiar face. Fast Tony was now dressed in a suit as well, though he still had his distinctive headband and sneakers, which made him stick out even more. "Hey, guys, remember me?" he asked smugly. He got more than a little satisfaction out of seeing the looks on their faces. "Guess what? I'm your boss now! Suck it!" He made an obscene gesture towards the pack.

"While his name may be a bit misleading, he certainly has the right attitude for a job like this," Reynard chuckled approvingly, putting an arm around the wolf's shoulder like they were old friends. He turned to the rest of the wolves, who were almost having more trouble accepting this than Lang's murder. "So whenever you need some more toys, come to this guy. And if there's any problem with those arrangements, he'll come to me." His eyes narrowed, his voice becoming chillingly quiet. "And if you value what pathetic lives you have left, you do  _not_ want him to come to me."

He grinned and clapped his paws together. "Anyhoo, that about covers orientation! Any questions?" They stared back with mixed looks of shock and horror. "Great! Then I'll just leave y'all to it, as you would say." He made it about three steps before he suddenly turned around again. "Oh, one more thing. I had a little run-in with the law earlier today, or rather the  _law_ ran into  _me._ " He pointed to the giant dent in the side of his limo. "You guys are sort of mechanics, right? So get on that, please and thank you."

Walking away for real this time, he headed for the bike Fast Tony left behind, pitch black and carrying a small box tied to its side. He hopped on and tucked his cane down the back of his suit, then pulled Nick's stolen phone out of his pocket and dropped it into the box before tying it up again. As he did all of this, Simon slowly came up behind him. "Not gonna lie, I was sure those wolves were going to kill you. I'm actually a bit impressed. And disappointed."

"You know you had faith in me all along."

"Don't press your luck." The raccoon glowered at him. "But aren't you forgetting something?"

"What, you mean Nicholas?" he asked, testing the engine. "I'm sure he's fine."

"That's not what I meant," Simon pressed. "Why did you just let him escape when you had Koslov's team out there searching for him this whole time?"

"Oh, that was really more of a diversion," he said, waving dismissively. "I just wanted to keep him busy so he didn't catch on to the plan."

"Sang was right, you know. That 'plan' had more holes in it than swiss cheese. All he had to do was try to use his phone and-"

"And  _what?_  He'd notice it was missing and come to the conclusion that his strikingly handsome long-lost father stole it from him as part of an elaborate scheme to find and murder Lady Lang?" Reynard shook his head, leaning down from the bike to smirk at him. "I taught him to be paranoid, but not  _that_  paranoid."

Simon stared blankly. "But that's...I still don't...you can't just..."

"Don't think about it too hard, Grandpa. You can't have a good con without a little risk. It's all about knowing how mammals  _think._ Like how I got Lady Lang to sign over her pack to me."

"You  _planned_ that?!"

"Now, if you'll excuse me…" He put his foot on the gas pedal experimentally. "This is the one that makes it go vroom, right?"

"...Have you ever ridden one of these before?"

"Nope!" He stepped on the gas and sped off, just barely avoiding a tree as he disappeared from view, cackling to himself.

Simon rubbed at his forehead, trying to figure out how the fox's mind worked, but as he felt a migraine coming on, he quickly gave up and went home.

* * *

_Torrential Turnpike_

_6: 50 PM_

When Carla awoke, she was upside down.

Slowly looking around her surroundings, she could tell that she was still inside of Nick's patrol car and that the car itself had been flipped onto its roof. She couldn't remember how. The last thing she could recall was that giant wolf leaping at her window, a feat that she had to admit was pretty hardcore, then nothing.

The hyena wearily reached up towards her seatbelt, which had clearly done its job considering she wasn't splattered on the freeway right now. Lightly pressing the button, the belt came loose and she held onto it to lower herself safely towards the floor/ceiling. Problem was, she'd really rather not let her bare feet touch all of that broken glass. With acrobatic skill from a time long past, Carla swung over to the door and unlatched it, then made another swing to toss herself through.

She hit the pavement hard and rolled away from the wreckage of her former vehicle. As she got back to her feet, a sudden throbbing made her put a paw to her head. When it came back soaked with blood, she realized that perhaps she hadn't gotten out so unscathed after all. The only question she had now was whether it was the accident or the wolf that had caused the head injury.

"Are you alright, Officer?" She turned around, seeing a leopard cop from the local precinct coming to her aid.  _Sure took him long enough._

"I've dealt with worse."

He nodded. "Regardless, we need you to come in and get checked out. That was a pretty serious accident you were just in. We'd also like you to give us your report on...whatever just happened here."

She surveyed the scene. Multiple overturned vehicles, a blockade of wreckage, and three dazed criminals currently being carted away, Koslov with several tranq rounds stuck in him. Perhaps this  _did_ require some explanation.

"Yeah...sure, no problem." She subconsciously started checking the rest of her body for injuries. Nothing  _felt_ broken, and she'd had enough broken bones to know what that was like, just a few bruises here and there along with the still-bleeding head wound. Checking her uniform and especially her badge to make sure everything was still in order, Carla finally followed the leopard over to a nearby ambulance. "Hey, did you see any sign of an Officer Nick Wilde?"

"The fox cop? I can't say we have, ma'am."

Ignoring the "ma'am" for the leopard's sake, she followed him over to the ambulance. Wherever he was, she resolved that Wilde owed her  _big time_ for this.

* * *

_1955 Cypress Grove Lane_

_7: 46 PM_

It never felt so good to be home. After literally sprinting the entire distance, which was still way too close to Lang's former hideout for comfort, Nick practically threw open the front door and collapsed on his bed from exhaustion. Not just the physical kind either.

After several minutes of just laying there, Nick finally started to crawl across the bed, over to his nightstand. Without bothering to look up, his paw fumbled around on the wooden surface until it finally wrapped around a square-shaped object and pulled it down to him.

Nick finally lifted his head, staring down at the picture frame now held between his paws. It was a very old picture, as evidenced by the bright-eyed, bushy-tailed smile plastered onto the muzzle of his younger self. A tall vixen stood to the left, laying a paw on his shoulder and smiling warmly. His mother, Marian Wilde. He found himself stroking a finger across her face softly and faintly wondered what she was doing at that moment. Not killing someone probably.

On young Nick's other shoulder was the paw of his father, John Wilde. His other arm was around his wife in a show of affection. He bore a happy smile, full of joy and humor, not at all like the psychotic grin Nick had seen plastered on him when he murdered Lady Lang. He reached down and tugged at his necktie.

"Dad...what  _happened_ to you?"

If not for the pristine suit and unmistakable mannerisms, he wasn't sure he would have even recognized that fox as his father. And as soon as he did, he'd been so overwhelmed with horror and panic that he just ran straight home like a scared little kit who had a bad day at school. Sometime during that mad sprint, it occurred to him that the last place he should be trying to hide from his family was at his house, but he kept running anyway. He needed the comfort of some familiar surroundings.

Once the adrenaline wore off, the truth of what he had just witnessed came crashing down on him. His father was the guy they had been chasing for over a week, the guy who had now murdered three crime lords in cold blood, the guy who was indeed gunning for Nick, but not to kill him. Oh no,  _that_ would have made it easy. Just what the hell was he going to do now?

He knew what he was  _supposed_ to do. He had witnessed a crime and was legally obligated to report it. To report his father, who he hadn't seen in decades, to the ZPD. To lock him away before he could so much as say "hi".

Groaning, Nick rolled onto his back, putting his paws to his face. "Why couldn't this just be simple?"

He couldn't do it. He couldn't tell anyone about this.  _Especially_ not Judy. Best case scenario, he'd just be dragging her into his own problems. Worst case scenario, she'd report it to Chief Bogo and cause all sorts of trouble. What about Mom? No, after all this time he had left her alone, he couldn't come back now just to dredge up horrible memories. He'd hurt her enough already. Finnick? Sure, maybe if he wasn't currently incarcerated and desperate for a way out. He'd like to think the fennec wouldn't try to strike some kind of plea bargain, but this situation was getting too crazy for him to take that kind of chance.

_Crazy like a fox, Nicholas?_

"Shut up, shut up, shut up!" Nick rolled back and forth on the bed, finally going just a bit too far and tumbling to the floor. Rubbing his head, he got back up, looking down at the police badge shining brightly on the front of his uniform.

For a brief moment, he thought about how much easier this would be if he weren't a cop.

In the next, he felt completely disgusted with himself. How could even consider something like that after all he'd been through? No, he just needed some time to think this over. He'd come up with a plan. He always did.

A loud rumbling came from outside and Nick turned his head, instantly recognizing the sound of a motorcycle.  _Oh crap, don't tell me those wolves aren't done with me yet._ Maybe Lady Lang really did have good intentions when she'd kidnapped him, but he somehow doubted that her orphaned children were very fond of him right now.

There was a distinct "thump" against his front door and Nick braced himself for an armed wolf to come busting in.

Then the sound of the motorcycle faded back into the distance again. So much for  _that_ theory. Didn't discount the possibility of a bomb, though. Creaking open his door gently, he saw that the thrown object was a small box that now sat innocently on his doorstep. Not hearing any ominous ticking at least, he slowly crouched down and opened it up.

It wasn't a bomb, but it sure dropped one on him.

The box contained the following items:

\- A tall cylinder of "Tomato Surprise", a special brand of chemical formula known for its ability to remove the stench of skunk spray from mammalian fur.

\- A roll of bills with the address of local dry-cleaner Frank Cunningham scribbled on the surface, presumably to get the same stench out of his uniform.

\- A gift-wrapped blueberry pie, which had even come shipped straight from the Hopps Family Farm. A small shiver ran up his spine.

\- Finally, his cell phone, which a quick search through his pockets confirmed was missing. Great. Now he couldn't even keep track of his own things.

"Dad always  _did_ like to spoil me," Nick muttered, forcing himself away from the sight of the pie. As much as he could use the comfort food, he was pretty sure that counted as accepting a bribe.

He pulled out the phone to check if it was at least alright and found that he apparently had an un-sent text message waiting to be delivered to Jimmy Frost of all mammals. Yet, the content of the message was clearly not directed at Jimmy...but at him.

" _It'll all be worth it, son. You'll see."_

* * *

_Dire Family Residence_

_8: 45 PM_

Nick wasn't the only one with family issues. Several miles away, Junior was having a pretty rough night himself.

When he had conceded defeat to that runty arctic fox and passed out, it was under the assumption that at least Lady Lang would be safe. So when he woke up later and found out that both she and Felix were dead, well... _insane with rage_ didn't quite express it fully enough. Especially when the rest of the pack told him that they were going right along with it, working for their murderer. Against the judgement of those traitors telling him not to overexert himself so soon after the match, Junior had hopped onto Fenrir, refusing to let anyone else touch his brother's bike, and drove off for home. He needed the comfort of some familiar surroundings.

Kicking open the front door to a small trailer at the edge of the rainforest, Junior made straight for the kitchen, having a serious craving for damn near anything he could fit his jaws around. Time to see how many deluxe meals from Burger Alpha could ease the pain of loss, and then he'd take the rest of that pain out on the bastard who killed Momma.

He stopped in the middle of the cramped hallway. The kitchen light was already on and low rustling sounds emanated from inside. Junior shook his fists, his teeth bared. He didn't know who had decided to break into their den, but it was the last mistake they would ever make. He dropped down onto all fours, creeping up to the kitchen on silent paw pads. Screw being civil. He was going to enjoy going full carnivore on this guy.

But as he rounded the corner and prepared to lunge, he found that "this guy" was a very familiar guy. "F-F-Felix?!"

The larger wolf sat shirtless at the kitchen table, grunting to himself as he wrapped bandages around his torso. "Hey, Junior."

"Don'cha 'Hey, Junior' me! I thought ya were dead!" the younger wolf yelled, rising back to two legs and wiping some drool from the side of his mouth.

"Really? Thought you knew me better than that," Felix muttered. "Hey, pass me that antiseptic."

"Uh...y-yeah, okay." His anger deflated, Junior passed the small bottle on the table over to Felix, who dabbed the substance over the bloody wound on his chest, then applied the bandages over top of it. Seeing the wound, Junior's eyes trailed down to the bullet sitting on a tissue in front of him. "How did ya pull that out?"

"Carefully." He finished wrapping the bandages, pulling them taut with his teeth. "And before you ask, I already buried Miss L- _Mother_ out back. I know you'll want to visit her too."

"Okay, lemme get this straight," Junior said slowly. "You were shot in the chest, thrown out the window, picked up Momma's body, carried her miles away back here, buried her, and  _now_ yer dealing with the bullet wound?!"

"Family comes first," he said simply, getting up from his chair and grabbing his shirt from the adjacent one. "Sorry to cut this visit short, but I have to be going."

"Going where?" Junior asked, too stunned to even question this anymore.

"Out." Felix threw the shirt over his body and headed past Junior, for the front door. "Out for blood."

"Oh, yer talkin' revenge. I can git' behind that, alright. Just let me go see Momma and then I'll join ya."

"No."

"W-What?"

"According to the asinine deal that fox made with our mother, any aggression from you, or the rest of the pack, will result in full gang warfare. And that is  _not_ what we need right now," he said firmly.

"That's the same hogwash the others tried to feed me," Junior grumbled, crossing his arms. "But doesn't that apply to you too?"

Felix smiled. "I never agreed to that deal, and more importantly, the Count thinks I'm dead. So you and the rest of the pack just play along for a while. Don't worry, I won't rest until I've avenged Mother."

Junior looked to the floor. "...Well, awright, but that doesn't mean I hafta like it." He looked up again to see Felix heading outside and hurriedly followed after him, watching as his brother climbed onto Fenrir.

"Thanks for bringing me my ride. That'll certainly make this easier."

"So, uh...what exactly are ya planning to do?" Junior asked curiously.

"Simple." He took a deep breath and cranked the handlebars. "I'm going to kill Wilde."

" _Which_ Wilde?"

Felix narrowed his eyes, his lips curling into a snarl. " _All of them."_

The bike roared to life and sped away, carrying its vengeful driver with it.

* * *

_ZNN Special Report!_

_9: 00 PM_

"Oh man, this one's gonna be huge! Mr. Lagopus might even give me a raise over this!"

"Uh, Stinkman, we're live."

"What?!"

The lens of a large news camera zoomed in on the form of a skunk in a yellow shirt and cargo shorts, wearing a ZNN cap atop his white-furred head. He held a microphone in one paw while using the other to fiddle with an air freshener hanging around his neck. As soon as he took notice of the camera, he quickly regained his composure and cleared his throat. "Good evening, Zootopia! It is a P-Utiful night here in the Rainforest District! This is Steven Stinkman bringing you the Nocturnal News!"

Steven started walking along the side of a river, continuing his report while the camera followed. "This just in, we are getting reports all over the district about strange behavior from the notorious Lang Family. This comes after over a week of rampant arson attacks plaguing these same mammals. Attacks that, while unconfirmed, are now believed to be the work of...a skunk." He looked down disapprovingly. "Because our reputation isn't bad enough I guess."

"Still live!" the cameramammal hissed, making Steven jump.

"A-Anyway, I musk emphasize that we still don't have all the details. However, we've just gotten a witness account that we know you'd like to hear." He came up to a boat docked on the side of the river. It was a large cabin cruiser with several rows of benches on its prow, dark red in color with the name "Foxglove" written on the side in pink cursive. "Introducing local eccentric tour guide, Billy Silva!"

"Who are you calling eccentric?" asked a silver fox in a black polo shirt and green shorts, wearing a fedora with a white band. The vulpine leaned against the side of his boat, crossing his arms at the reporter.

"Mr. Silva here noticed something unusual just a little while ago, isn't that right?" the skunk asked, holding the microphone towards his muzzle.

Ignoring the earlier slight, the fox grinned, eagerly leaning into the mic. "That's right! You see, I was standing on my deck, enjoying the scenery, when I suddenly hear this loud scream. Now I'm pretty good at sightseeing, so I point my binoculars up towards where I heard the sound and I see the strangest thing."

"And what would that be, Mr. Silva?" Steven pressed.

"It was a pretty fair distance away, but I could've sworn I saw something white falling from a tree and into the forest, screaming the whole way."

Steven nodded grimly. "Yes, there were several reports about this scream, along with a chorus of howling that followed it. Given the current state of the Lang Family, I think we can come to a solid conclusion what happened."

"I think we can," Billy affirmed. He turned and looked straight into the camera. "There can be no doubt that what I saw tonight...was a ghost."

Stinkman lowered the mic. "What?"

"Mammals of the Rainforest District, take heed and know that your lands are haunted by the spirits of the damned!" he said dramatically.

Steven stepped in front of him, rapidly waving his paws. "No no no, that is  _not_ the conclusion ZNN is making! What Mr. Silva saw was clearly the infamous Lady Lang-"

"Yes! The ghost of Lady Lang, ghastly ruler of the rainforest! Seeking revenge for her death, her spirit will haunt its denizens foooooreeeeeeverrrrrrr!" He wiggled his fingers and made a spooky moan. "Unless you show respect to her lands by taking 'Billy Silva's Haunted Boat Tour', now just $11.99 per ticket in reverence to the dead!" Steven quickly shoved him out of the frame. "And free seating for children!"

The skunk laughed nervously, tugging at his collar. "Well, he's right about one thing: it seems that Lady Lang, one of the five major crime lords of Zootopia, has been murdered. This is the third such murder to occur in less than two weeks. Coincidence? I stink  _not!_  As with the previous victims, Mr. Big of Tundratown and Damien Thornbrush of Outback Island, Lang's crime family now appears to be taking odors from a new kingpin. We'll keep you updated as the story unfolds, but one thing seems certain." He extended a paw and caught a drop of rain as it landed in his palm. "There's a storm coming."

"Ugh, that was so cliche," Billy chided from off-camera.

Steven put a paw over his mic and turned away. "Do you  _mind?_ I'm trying to tell the story here!"

"Yeah, and you wouldn't be getting anywhere if it weren't for me giving you so many ideas!"

"Wrap it up!" yelled the cameramammal.

He turned back to the camera, giving a large, forced grin. "Until next time, this is Steven Stinkman with the Nocturnal News! Good night, everybody!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that wraps up the Lang Family arc! The arcs are only going to get lengthier from here. As you can imagine, there's a lot to cover in the coming chapters.
> 
> One thing you've probably noticed about Count Reynard is that he talks. He talks a lot. He talks so much that he needs multiple paragraphs just to fit it all. Hell, we even had to cut some of it out just so he doesn't go from John Wilde to John Galt. Why do you think we never showed his side of those phone conversations?
> 
> But more importantly, you're probably wondering what the hell that last scene was about. Well, this isn't the first time we've mentioned ZNN, but now I am actually a member of the site and got my own little "zoosona" to go along with it: Steven J. Stinkman, the pun-gent reporter. Mind Jack also has a zoosona known as Billy Silva. So yes, we literally just self-inserted ourselves into the story, but only as outsiders. (And we fully admit that it was entirely filler. Sure was fun though.)
> 
> Speaking of ZNN, we've recently passed a million pageviews! So if you haven't checked us out yet, I highly encourage you to do so. :)


	16. Let Sleeping Dogs Lie

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're just going to warn you in advance that this next intermission will take two chapters to wrap up. So the Sanchez arc is going to have to wait a bit. Hey, we really wanna get to it too. XD
> 
> But in the pursuit of not boring you too much, we've got quite a bit to get into before then.

****

**Chapter 16: Let Sleeping Dogs Lie**

_Rainforest District_

_Shady Place_

_9: 31 PM_

By virtue of its thick foliage and abundance of land off of public roads, the Rainforest District in particular was a haven for conducting activities you didn't want other people to see. With the wolves out of his fur for now, Count Reynard had found the perfect spot to tie up one last loose end. The vulpine crime lord leaned up against the side of a tree, his cane crossed over one side. The forest clearing rustled with the sounds of nature as rain continued to pour down around him. Convenient as this place was, he would not miss the rain  _or_ the smell of wet dog.

"Ah, finally." He smiled as a large black van rolled up into the clearing in front of him. From the front of the van emerged the massive form of Koslov, who hadn't quite fit into the vehicle and looked more than a little sore. He walked around to the back and opened it up, reaching in to pull out an indignant Fangs and Boomer.

"Oi, what's the big idea?!" the dingo protested. "Ya just tossed us in back like a pile a' chunder!"

"Would you rather have been stuffed into the front with Koslov?" asked Boomer as the polar bear put them down.

"Sorry for the wait, gentlemammals," Reynard greeted pleasantly. "The Precinct 4 police chief gave me a bit of lip when I tried to get you out, but of course, I convinced him in the end. Seems the desire to not have your house burned down is universal."

Fangs froze up, only now noticing the Count. "W-We're sorry for failing ya, sir! Nick was j-just too slippery for us!" he stammered.

"Well, of course he was. He's my son!" Reynard chuckled in approval. "There's no shame in being outwitted by a fox. In fact, I actually wanted to reward you."

"Reward us? For what?" Boomer asked suspiciously.

"For providing me the information on how to reproduce  _this_ little trinket of course." He reached into his front pocket and pulled out a pair of blue pellets. "Feral Dream has been quite the commodity indeed. I can see why your organization was making such a good profit off of it."

Fangs blinked at the unexpected compliment. "Oh. Well...thank you."

"No, thank  _you."_ He winked at them. "There's a reason I brought  _two_  of these, you know."

Boomer's eyes widened. "You mean…?"

"That's right. You've provided me a good service, and in return, I've decided to let you have a little fun." He held out the pellets, letting the Outbackers snatch them out of his paw.

"Ace, I could  _use_ some relief from all this stress." Fangs held the pellet over his head, looking at it ecstatically. "Ya sure we can just do this right now?"

"Certainly. Though if you don't mind, I'd rather you not ruin my suits, so if you could just…"

The two naturalists stripped down so quickly that Koslov had to immediately shield his eyes, barely catching the discarded suits as they were thrown into his face. "How do ya feel about a little sprint through the rainforest, Boomer?" Fangs asked the kangaroo.

"That sounds absolutely invigorating!" he responded, grinning in anticipation. "Bottom's up, mate."

The two Outbackers tossed the pellets into their mouths, chewing on them greedily and swallowing. "I forgot how good these were," Fangs laughed, his body already shuddering from the effects. "Flavor's a bit unusual though. This a new blend?"

"No, it's the old blend," Reynard said, smiling softly. "The  _very_ old blend."

Boomer suddenly clutched at his throat, eyes widening in realization. "N-Night Howlers!"

Reynard watched as the Outbackers collapsed, choking on the substance. "Amazing what a little reverse-engineering and blue food dye can do, eh? But don't feel too bad. Like I said, there's no shame in being outwitted by a fox."

"Why?!" Fangs pleaded pitifully, dropping onto all fours as he struggled to keep control over himself. "Ya just said...we did good…"

Reynard shook his head unsympathetically. "How quickly you forget. Before your sense of self goes to the land down under, I suppose I better remind you." He glared at them darkly, whacking his cane into his open paw. "Did you  _really_ think I was going to let you get away with trying to murder my son?"

Boomer staggered as he reached towards him. "But...the disco ball…the fire…"

"Okay, so some of my associates could afford to be a bit more careful," he admitted. "But the key difference is that I still have a use for them. And now that I have the Feral Dream formula, you've proven tonight that you're only useful when you're not sapient." The naturalists' speech slipped away in favor of animalistic growls and barks. "So I think I'll just keep you that way."

Fangs reared his head up, eyes turning to slits as he let out a loud snarl and lunged for Reynard's throat.

Quick as a flash, the fox jabbed the tip of his cane into the dingo's chest. It sparked brightly, sending a high-voltage current into the Outbacker. Fangs fell to the ground, twitching violently. Boomer didn't even get that far as Koslov slammed two meaty fists down onto the roo's skull, knocking him out instantly.

"Cause and effect," Reynard said, dusting off his paws as Koslov threw the newly savage mammals into the back of the van and shut them in once more. He dug another Night Howler pellet out of his front pocket and examined it in admiration. "These little guys really pack a punch. I'll get some fun out of my new toys yet." He dropped the pellet into the mouth of his cane, electing to save it for a special occasion.

With business concluded, Koslov drove off with his cargo while Reynard turned and walked away, laughing to himself.

He made it a point to step on Boomer's dropped bowler hat on the way out.

* * *

_Savannah Central_

_Zootopia Police Department - Precinct 1_

_9: 54 PM_

"That...really could have gone better."

Judy shot a brief glare at Officer Grizzoli. By the time they got another patrol car to give them a ride back, she was in no mood for comments like that. It reminded her too much of something Nick would say.

She reflexively turned back to Jimmy, who had gone from shouting his head off to not saying a word. Head bowed, tail drooped, the arctic fox simply trudged along behind them, holding the badly-mangled Wallace close to his chest like a security blanket. Though he hadn't mentioned it, she knew he must have been worried for Nick as well. If someone was able to steal his phone, then she could only fear the worst.

It didn't help that she had little to no information on where he even was. "I-I'm sorry, I haven't heard anything yet!" Clawhauser squeaked out, a bit frightened of the bunny now standing on his desk.

"How can you not have heard anything?" she pressed. "I thought he was going to a bar or something. Hasn't  _anyone_ seen him?"

"Well, I-I mean we don't usually get...reports...about…" He gulped upon seeing the bunny's foot tapping. "Let me just check back again." Clawhauser quickly picked up the phone and dialed frantically.

"Maybe check into Delgato at the hospital while you're at it? I want to know how he's doing," Grizzoli requested.

After a few minutes of listening to the cheetah's disproportionately perky conversation, he finally put the phone back down with a smile on his face. "Good news! I can answer both of your questions!" He turned to the polar bear. "Delgato is feeling peachy-keen! Officer Hyenandez is keeping him company."

"Carla? What's she doing there?" asked Judy.

"She was brought in after the car accident."

" _What_ car accident?!" Her foot fired up again.

"Uh…" Clawhauser suddenly realized that perhaps this  _wasn't_  such good news. "The one where...Nick got...uh...kidnapped?"

Her worst fears were realized. "WHAT?!"

Jimmy lifted his head slightly. "Nick…?"

"There's a real lack of communication going on between the precincts here," Grizzoli noted.

"Come on, we need to get back out there and find him!" Judy shouted, already about to rush back to the car.

"I'm flattered by the concern, but that won't be necessary, Carrots."

The group of three turned away from the front desk to see the red fox in question just standing there behind them, as casually as if he were just coming in for another shift at work. "Yo."

Judy wasn't sure if she should feel overjoyed or infuriated right now. She settled on confused. "Wha...how? I thought you were kidnapped!"

"Oh right. That." He shrugged. "I escaped."

"Escaped?" Judy asked flatly.

"Yup." Technically, it wasn't a lie.

"What happened to your uniform?" Grizzoli pointed a claw at the fox, now dressed in his casual clothes again.

"Getting it dry-cleaned. Pretty sure you wouldn't want me around smelling like  _that_." He shrugged. "I'm not on duty right now, so no biggie, right?"

Judy stepped a little closer and sniffed at him. "Huh. You don't smell the least bit skunky. What did you use on your fur?"

Nick's composure shook, just for an instant. "O-Oh, just a...family recipe."

"Tomato juice? That's what my uncle Gregory used when he ticked off a skunk a few years ago."

"Something like that."

"Okay...and where exactly  _were_ you?" Judy asked. "I mean, it's great that you're back, but most mammals don't just walk away from being kidnapped."

"And who took you, anyway?" added Grizzoli. "The Count's boys or Lang's?"

"Whoa, guys." Nick put his paws up defensively. "I just got back and I'm a little tired. Can we save the interrogation until later? I'll be happy to give my official report in the morning."  _Once I have time to come up with it._

Judy stared at him for a long while, then sighed. "Alright...but you had  _better_ explain everything to us later." She pointed a firm finger at him.

"No problem, Carrots." He was quick to change the subject. "How have you guys been? Make any progress on Lang?"

He flinched upon seeing them all avert their eyes. He certainly could have chosen a more tactful way to divert suspicion. "Lady Lang...is dead," Judy finally said.

Their reaction was understandable, and as Nick faked surprise, he quickly took notice of Jimmy Frost. The younger fox hugged Wallace tightly, almost on the verge of tears. Not only had Jimmy not said a word since his return, he seemed to be taking Lang's death even harder than the others. But why? What did  _he_ have to do with this?

_The phone! Dad was contacting him! Don't tell me he-_

"Hey, kid?" Jimmy remained silent. "Frost?" He had to physically walk up and put a paw on his shoulder. "Jimmy?"

He slowly looked up and stared at him. "Y-Yes, Nick?"

"I think we need to talk."

Judy stepped towards them, but Nick raised a paw. "I know you want to help, Carrots, but I think a little fox-to-fox chat might do him some good." It was a complete load of bunk, but he had predicted Judy's response correctly, as she just nodded once and backed down.

 _Maybe I_  do _still have too much of my dad in me._ He put his arm around Jimmy's shoulder and led him away.

* * *

_Rainforest District_

_Canopy Medical Clinic_

_9: 36 PM_

"Juro por dios, if I have to stay here any longer, I am going to kill someone!" Carla Hyenandez lay back in her cot, a bandage wrapped around her head as she tried as hard as she could to stay still.

"You know, Nick was like that too when he was admitted," chuckled Officer Delgato from the cot next to her. After getting on the wrong side of one of the arsonist's bombs, the tiger had lost a good amount of fur from the burns, and his remaining pelt had more black than usual. All things considered though, he was doing alright. "Consider yourself lucky you're not nearly as hurt as he was, or  _I_ am for that matter. You should be cleared for duty again in no time."

She growled and crossed her arms, staring at the wall. "Hmph. Doesn't mean I have to like it."

"If you'd like to pass the time, I'm free to chat."

"No shit. Who  _else_ am I going to talk to?"

He smiled. "Is that a yes?"

"...Yes."

Delgato turned to face her, looking at the hyena curiously. "By that accent of yours, am I correct in thinking you hail from New Mexicow?" If he wanted to keep this going, he had to start somewhere.

"I do. Fangmeyer told me that you do as well?"

"Si," he smirked.

She rolled her eyes. "Don't think that we're suddenly best friends just because we share a subdistrict."

"I wouldn't dream of it. What street?"

"That's classified."

He frowned. Talk about a tough nut to crack. "I suppose I can tell you more about myself then."

"Feel free."

"I live on Aburrido St. with my mother and sister, who folks sometimes confuse me with. I spend my free time at the nearest Bug Burrito joint, watching the newest luchador matches, and going out to the Palms Hotel to get my groove on."

"Wait, what was that?" Carla asked, suddenly a lot more interested.

"My groove? Well, I won't be doing it again for a while now, but if you want, I can show you a video mi madre took of me doing the-"

"Not  _that_!" she hissed. "The luchador thing."

Delgato rubbed his head sheepishly. "I know, I'm a little old for it, but I just can't help myself. Every time I see those mammals in the ring go at it, I just get so fired up. Though I will admit that it hasn't quite been the same, since, well…"

"No," Carla said firmly, interrupting him. "No it has not."

He raised an eyebrow. "You a fan too?"

"You could say that."

"Now  _that_ I didn't expect," he grinned. "Any favorites?"

"Yes."

He waited a few seconds, until it became abundantly clear that he was getting no further response. "Um, I've always been partial to La Mala Perra myself. And I'm not just saying that because she happens to be a hyena! There's something about her that just speaks to me."

"Like what?" Carla challenged.

Taken aback by the short reply, Delgato struggled to answer. "It's...her spirit I would say. She has such a passion for the ring, and a determination to keep fighting no matter what," he explained, slowly looking Carla up and down. "You actually remind me of her a little. Except for one thing."

"What's that?"

"La Mala Perra is famous for her jovial attitude and loud, boisterous laughter. But you...you don't laugh."

"Don't let appearances fool you," Carla grumbled. "No matter how glamorous it may seem, some mammals just like to hide behind a mask."

"I suppose you're right," Delgato admitted. A few more seconds passed by in silence before he turned back to face her again, a smile on his face. "You're a fascinating mammal, Carla. If you want, I wouldn't mind showing you around town a bit, maybe going out for a bite-"

"Sorry, but no."

Delgato flinched. "Ouch. Shot down mid-sentence. Can't blame a guy for trying."

"It's not you," she clarified, actually smiling back at him. "Just that I'm already taken."

The tiger stared at her for a few seconds, then burst out laughing.

"What's so funny?!"

Delgato forced himself to stop, lest he end up losing the rest of his fur as well. "S-Sorry, that just caught me by surprise is all."

"You didn't think I could get a mate?" Carla asked, narrowing her eyes threateningly.

"No!" he said hastily. "I just didn't exactly get that impression from your work ethic. No offense, but you seem a lot more…" He chose his words carefully. "... _stressed_ than I would expect from someone in a relationship."

Carla turned away, sighing. "Ain't that the truth? I haven't even seen my mate in so long now. Not since I joined the police academy."

He leaned forward in surprise. "You mean they didn't even show up to your graduation?"

"Don't get the wrong idea," she snapped. "I'm the one to blame. Let's just say work has been taking precedence lately."

"Then request some time off. Nothing is more important than spending time with your loved ones," Delgato advised.

"I can't."

"Why not?"

"I just  _can't_!" She snarled. Looking down, she saw that her claws had gotten lodged in the cot. "Not until I finish what I set out to do…"

Delgato just stared, unsure what to make of the hyena anymore.

"Officer Hyenandez?" A tall antelope nurse suddenly appeared in the doorway. "We've just finished up your paperwork. You're free to leave at any time."

"Finally," she grumbled, flinging herself off of the cot and heading straight for the door.

"H-Hey, wait!" Delgato shouted after her. "What do you mean by-"

The door shut behind her.

* * *

_Zootopia Police Department - Precinct 1_

_10: 04 PM_

At this time of night, the only place Nick knew  _nobody_ would be was in the bullpen. He needed absolute privacy if he was going to get the truth out of Jimmy. Flipping on the lights, he stepped into the room, letting the arctic fox file in behind him. "Nick? What's…?"

"Alright, kid, what's going on here?" Nick stopped and turned around abruptly. "You've been really quiet since I got here. Freakishly quiet actually."

And he went freakishly quiet again, looking away. "It's n-nothing."

What was going on here? He never expected Jimmy Frost of all people to hide something from him, not that he had any right to judge. He looked the arctic fox up and down, trying to get a read on him. "Are you sure?"

"Y-Yeah. Don't worry about me."

So that was it. The fact that he was talking to Nick was precisely the problem. Jimmy idolized him, and didn't want to drag him into his own issues. The irony was suffocating.

Well, if talking to Nick was the problem, then he simply had to stop being Nick.

"Take a seat," Nick said simply, gesturing to the rows of tables and chairs before them.

He looked back in surprise. "A...seat?"

"Yes. I need to get your report on the incident," he said sternly, dropping his usual laid-back attitude.

With no further coaxing, Jimmy chose to sit right up front, paws clasped together in attention. Nick moved a small box behind the podium and used it to boost himself up so he could stand behind it. Jimmy looked confused, but kept focused on him anyway. This was all by design of course. Nick was a bit dicey at getting others to share their feelings, considering he could hardly do it himself, but pulling rank as his superior officer would trigger Jimmy's natural desire to respect authority and answer.

He tried to ignore the fact that this was the exact kind of manipulation his father excelled at. "Officer Frost, tell me the events leading up to the murder of Lady Lang."

It was hard to ignore it when it worked. "O-Of course..." Jimmy hesitated, but just for a moment. "Well...while you were gone, Judy, Grizzoli, and I were doing our own investigation, trying to track down Lang ourselves. But while that was going on, I suddenly started getting these...text messages."

"Text messages? From who?"

Jimmy suddenly looked extremely guilty, and Nick had a sinking suspicion he knew why. "From...you."

Nick subconsciously looked down at his pocket, where he could plainly see a bulge from his cell phone. And now his suspicions were confirmed. "But you know now that it wasn't actually me."

"Yeah…" Jimmy shuddered, staring down at his feet. "I think it was the Count. Somehow, he knew what you were up to at the time and was impersonating you. Then he...he…" Jimmy broke into tears. "...he got me to tell him where Lady Lang was."

Nick winced. If his dad  _contacting_  Jimmy weren't bad enough, he had outright conned the younger fox into screwing over the entire Lang Family. He saw Jimmy crying in front of him and felt a flash of disgust. How could John do something so horrible to such a naive, innocent mammal?

 _Because he's a con artist, you idiot. That's what they_ do. _You should know._

"I...I see…" That sure complicated things. On the plus side, at least Jimmy didn't know how complicated it really  _was,_ and judging by his reaction, that was probably for the best. That's what Nick kept telling himself anyway.

"Hey, Nick?" He snapped out of his daze upon hearing Jimmy's wracked voice again. "Did you ever find out anything? When...when you were kidnapped I mean. Like who this Count really is?"

"No, I'm afraid not." The lie slipped out so easily he couldn't stop it if he wanted to.

"O-Oh…" Nick had to avert his eyes from the sorrow on Jimmy's face.

_Can't justify that one, can you? No clever wordplay to make it sound any better. You just outright lied to him._

_It's not like that! Jimmy is so broken up over this already, I can't wreck him even more by telling him my dad is behind it!_

_Sure. Or you're just too much of a coward to come clean._

Now even his inner monologue was conflicted. "But I'm sure we'll get 'em eventually!" Yikes, that sounded lame even to him.

"...You really think so?"

Hopping down from the podium, Nick wrapped an arm around the smaller fox's shoulder. "I  _know_ so. A ZPD officer doesn't throw in the towel after a few little hiccups, does he? We just have to keep trudging forward until we come out on top."

"Wow…" Jimmy wiped a few tears away and stared at him in awe. "How can you be so confident, Nick? That's amazing."

_Yeah, there's some real "confidence" going on here alright._

"Oh, you know…" Nick himself didn't even know. "...just comes with the territory."

He wasn't prepared for Jimmy to suddenly pull him into a hug, still sobbing, but with less grief. "Thanks, Nick. If you really believe in me that much...I'll just have to keep trying. Because that's how much I believe in  _you._ "

Way to twist the knife even further. "...That's fine, kid. That's all anyone can ask of you."

In a perfect world, the conversation would have ended there. Nick's world was anything but. "...How did you get your phone back?"

Nick realized that he had let the arctic fox get just a little too close...literally. Jimmy was now staring directly at the lump in his pocket, breaking away from the hug.

_Crap._

"D-During my escape of course," he said quickly. "I swiped it back from the guy who stole it from me."

"Then you  _did_ see who it was," Jimmy pressed.

"N-N-No! I...I just happened to see it lying there on my way out so I just sort of...grabbed it."

Even naive, gullible Jimmy Frost looked skeptical. If this didn't happen to come out of Nick's mouth, he probably wouldn't have bought it for a second.

"Anyway!" He abruptly backed away, towards the door. "Just remember what I said about believing in yourself, okay?" He got no response. "Good. Then if you'll excuse me, I've got some things to take care of." Forcing a smile, Nick kept backing away until his back hit the door, he fumbled for the handle for a few seconds, then hurriedly left.

_Smooth, Nick. Real smooth._

_Shut up._

* * *

_Detention Center_

_10\. 24 PM_

What a disaster of a night. Nick had wanted to assure everyone at the precinct that he was safe, but now he was starting to think he should have just called in instead. He had done almost nothing but lie since he got here, and if he ran into anyone else tonight, he was going to completely fall apart.

So he decided that the only mammal he could talk to right now was the only mammal he could be completely open with. And that mammal was currently sitting in detention with no one else to talk to. They could both use the chat.

Or so he thought. "What do you mean I can't talk to him?"

It came out harsher than intended, but he really didn't have the patience for this right now. "I'm sorry, Officer Wilde, but visiting hours are over," said Officer Swinton, an older pig who worked shifts both here and the local prison. Probably not the kind of mammal Nick would ever get along with even in the best of times.

"Can't you make an exception for a fellow officer? I mean, I arrested the guy myself for crying out loud."

"I'm afraid not," Swinton said, in a tone telling him to take a hint. "You'll just have to come back tomorrow."

It was a perfectly reasonable suggestion, and one Nick would have had no problem with under better circumstances, but if he didn't get to vent to  _someone_ tonight, he wasn't sure he would survive until tomorrow.

Before he could argue back though, his sharp hearing picked up another voice coming from the door behind Swinton. It was faint, faint enough that he probably wouldn't have noticed it if it weren't so loud and booming. Last he checked, Finnick wasn't in the habit of talking to himself. "Visiting hours are over, huh?"

"That is a special exception. He wanted a-" Caught off-guard, Nick brushed past Swinton and into the room, ignoring her shouts of protest behind him as he slammed the door in her face and locked it. He heard the pig swear loudly from the other side and run off. Thankfully, she didn't have a key on her, but it would only be a matter of time until she came back. He needed to make this quick.

"Alright, Finnick, what's the big idea...with…" Nick trailed off at the bizarre sight in front of him. The fennec fox was plainly visible on the other side of the glass, looking like he had just been caught with his paw in the cookie jar. On the visitor's side, an impeccably-dressed siamese cat stood on the counter, a briefcase visible in his tiny paw. "Who the hell is this?"

"Aw crud, you weren't supposed to come here now," Finnick sighed, pinching his brow. "This is Sam Burmowitz...my lawyer."

The cat looked vaguely familiar to him, but he couldn't quite put a finger on it, nor did he care to. "You got a  _lawyer?_ You  _hate_ lawyers!"

Finnick shrugged. "I hate 'em up until I need 'em."

The cat, Sam, gave him a polite nod. "My client, Mr. Finnegan Chamberlain, has requested my services on account of the charges pressed against him. We need to discuss how he's going to behave in the trial." He frowned. "It's an area I believe will require  _much_ discussion."

"Trial?!" Nick snapped. "There's not going to  _be_ a trial! I told you I was going to-"

"Get me outta here, I know," Finnick finished. "But let's face the facts, Nick. You and I both know that ain't happening anytime soon."

"So what, you don't trust me anymore, is that it?" Nick's paws clenched at his sides, his teeth bared and his eyes narrowed at the small fox he used to consider his closest friend, his  _only_ friend. To think he'd gone through all of this trouble to confide in Finnick, only to find that he'd already walked out on him. Considering how guilty he already felt about lying to everyone else, this was only preying on his insecurities even further.

"It ain't like that!" Finnick argued. "But at this point, I need to start looking at some other options in case things go sour."

"Like this guy?" Nick shot a pointed glare at Burmowitz. "You called in some scrawny cat to bail you out instead of me? Who  _else_ have you been talking to behind my back?"

Sam frowned, sighing heavily. "With all due respect, Mr. Wilde, there was going to be a trial regardless of what you did. You don't have the authority to-"

"Nobody asked you!"

With that, Nick could see the feline shake his head and conspicuously avert his gaze from the two foxes, which just made him bristle even more.

A part of him knew that he wasn't acting rationally. That there was nothing wrong with Finnick wanting a lawyer. But Nick's rational side had been firmly buried under a mound of stress, unwanted memories, and physical exhaustion. Frankly, Burmowitz should consider himself lucky that this was the extent of his hostility.

"Yeah, and he ain't cheap either," Finnick shot back. "So if you could just am-scray for a while, I'm sure we can get this all sorted out."

"I'm sure you could!" Nick yelled, storming up to the glass. "I thought you were the one mammal who I could speak my mind to, but I guess I was wrong!" Nick slammed a paw on the glass, actually making Finnick flinch a little.

What now? No matter what kind of shitstorm life threw at him, Finnick had always been the constant, the life vest that kept him afloat. If he didn't even have him anymore...what else could he do but sink?

Nick looked down at the counter, his breath shuddering. "I...I really am alone…"

"My, this sounds familiar, don't it?" Nick looked back up again to see Finnick looking not the least bit moved. "Kinda like when  _you_ left  _me_  alone by becoming a cop."

"It's nothing like-"

"Oh really? Cuz' it sounds a whole lot like that to me."

Nick stammered, trying to respond. Finnick was right, and he  _knew_ he was right. If he wanted to, he could resolve this right here, admit that he was wrong, apologize, and move on.

But that was one step his crumbling sense of pride wasn't willing to take. "Forget it." Nick backed away from the counter. "If you don't want my help anymore, fine. You go ahead and keep chatting with your new best friend here. Do whatever you want. I'll leave you alone, no problem."

"Nick!"

The red fox paid him no heed and stormed out of the room, inadvertently swinging the door into Officer Swinton's face as she rushed back. The door closed again, leaving Finnick and his lawyer in the room.

Sam coughed uncomfortably and straightened his tie. "Now that that's out of the way...I believe we were talking about how to keep calm under pressure, Mr. Chamberlain."

"Don't call me that."

Nick left the detention center, Precinct 1, and Savannah Central still feeling bitter. By the time he got home and rested up,  _maybe_ he would be calm enough to go back and talk to him tomorrow.

Unfortunately, once tomorrow came, he no longer had that option.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We liked Fangs and Boomer as much as the next guy, but to be perfectly frank, we didn't really have any more use for them in the story. And no, the irony is not lost on us.
> 
> We all knew Nick wasn't taking this well. This was another difficult chapter since I am personally not very skilled at writing angst, so it was hard to convey Nick's downward spiral here while keeping it believable to his character. I'm curious to know how that came across.
> 
> Samuel D. Burmowitz comes from "BvB: Butting Heads" a fic from PresidentStalkeyes which I highly recommend. It's a very different kind of Bellwether redemption fic with high-quality OC's and exceptional world-building. Pres also went and tied some elements from BtBW into it as well, so I'm not just plugging this other story for no reason.
> 
> Part 2 of the intermission will come next time, where...things will happen. Let's just say that much.


	17. The Cat's out of the Bag

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Halloween, everyone!
> 
> But the time of year isn't the only reason this is a very special chapter. Why? Because with this chapter, Born to Be Wilde has just passed the glorious 100K milestone! Let no word count filter stand in our way!
> 
> Here's hoping for another 100K. Maybe. Probably.

****

**Chapter 17: The Cat's out of the Bag**

_Savannah Central_

_Zootopia Police Department - Precinct 1_

_8: 51 AM_

Nick was a bit later than usual that morning. This would soon become the least of his problems.

The moment he walked through the front door, he was furiously glomped by Judy, who could only have done so if she had been watching the door the whole time. "Where have you  _been?"_ she asked worriedly. "I've been calling you all night! Why didn't you pick up?"

"Sorry about that. Must've left my phone somewhere." He put on his best guilty expression, which felt  _really_  fake compared to his actual guilt.

Judy punched him in the arm, immediately followed by another hug. "Don't make me worry like that, you jerk!" She smiled up at his badge. "Nice to see you got your uniform back at least. Should take  _some_ of the edge off of your tardiness."

"I aim to please," he chuckled, looking down at his uniform. Thankfully, all traces of skunk spray were gone, leaving him with just the  _usual_ strong musk of a fox.

"Then why  _are_ you late?"

"Just had some things to sort out," he answered vaguely. "I considered requesting the day off, but what else am I gonna do aside from hanging out with my pals at the ZPD? It's either that or stay home and eat cookie dough out of a tube."

As much as Judy wanted to explain that the ZPD was not a place to "hang out", she had much bigger concerns on her mind. "Well, as long as you're here, I believe you have some explaining to do," she said sternly. "Especially on account of Jimmy."

"What about Jimmy?" Nick asked, wincing a bit.

"I don't know what you said to him, but he's somehow even  _worse_ than yesterday. Any idea what that's about?" she asked, somewhat accusingly.

 _Yeah, I have a pretty good idea._ "No, I don't have a clue."

Judy didn't exactly look convinced, which meant that today was already going wrong. Fortunately, he had a solution this time. After putting all of his most sly and cunning brain cells together, he had finally come up with the perfect cover story to both get everyone off of his back and leave him time to come up with a real solution. "But I  _can_ tell you happened when I was kidnapped."

Judy took the bait, her expression softening a bit. "Alright. What happened?"

Nick cleared his throat for dramatic effect and then began. "It all started when Felix, the big bad wolf on the tricked out bike, drove off with me to Lady Lang's. Now, I was knocked out most of the time, but when I woke up, I saw-"

"WILDE!"

Nick and Judy both froze in place at the familiar, booming voice of Chief Bogo. It really had a way of making them forget the current topic. "...Are you  _sure_ you're not in trouble for more than being late?" Judy asked nervously. That yell sounded intense, even for the chief.

"Pretty...sure…" He glanced towards Clawhauser at the reception desk. The portly cheetah just shrugged helplessly in response.

They both looked up as the water buffalo leaned over the top railing, glared at the fox, and pointed threateningly towards his office door. "Any idea what he wants, Carrots? The chief's a bit too subtle for me sometimes."

She looked towards him fearfully, knowing from experience that being called to the chief's office with  _that_ shout and gesture could only end badly. "Nick...good luck. I'll be right out here if you need me." She grabbed his paw in support.

"Thanks." Though he didn't show it, he was apprehensive about this as well. It couldn't just be about his tardiness...could it?

Nick kept as big a smile as he could manage while he headed into the elevator, shooting a casual wave to Judy as the doors closed in front of him.

_I am so dead._

* * *

_Chief Bogo's Office_

_9: 03 AM_

Nick had been called to the chief's office more times than he could count, and yet, there was something different about it this time. A feeling of dread that he just couldn't shake. Just what could the chief have in store for him? Something about his tone told him it was something big.

No, it wasn't just the chief. The atmosphere of the entire precinct had changed in some indescribable way literally overnight. It didn't seem like Judy had noticed, but he'd become aware of numerous pairs of eyes turning to stare at him as soon as he'd walked in, not with the usual warm friendliness he had become used to, but with something akin to...suspicion?

 _Of_ course _they're suspicious of me. I would be too._ Yet, somehow, he got the feeling this was even worse than he expected.

"I'm getting sick of this, Wilde," Bogo snapped as soon as he came in. That was a red flag already. He wasn't even bothering to build it up first.

"Sick of what, exactly?" Nick asked cautiously as he slipped into the chair. "The murders, the investigation…?"

"You." He sat back in his chair and glared at him calmly through his spectacles. "I'm sick of  _you_ , Wilde."

 _Ouch._  "Hey, I'm not crazy about talking to you either, so just tell me what this is about. I know I'm late, I got held up at-"

"I don't care about your tardiness."

Okay, that's one item to cross off the list. "Uh...I was going to give my report on the kidnapping incident later, so-"

"I don't care about the kidnapping."

Now  _that_ was news to him. "You...you don't?"

Bogo's expression remained neutral. "Normally, I would care quite a bit, but since you're obviously fine and don't feel inclined enough to give an  _immediate_ report on your own well-being, I'll set that aside for now. Hell, I'll even give you a mulligan for the patrol car you somehow managed to trash." Oh right, that too. Bogo leaned down and stared at him intently. "As a matter of fact, I'd like to talk to you about something very different. It's about your activities with a certain  _suspect_ …"

Nick stiffened. That sure narrowed it down. "Look, I sent Officer Swinton a card and a gift basket, it's okay."

Bogo lost his anger for just a moment, squinting in confusion. "...What?"

 _Guess Swinton didn't want to admit I got the better of her._ "Nothing."

"Enough with the diversions, Wilde!" Bogo slammed a hoofed fist on his desk. "You know what this is about!"

He really wished that he did. "Uh...can I have another hint?"

"I believe you would recognize the name 'Finnegan Chamberlain', yes?" Bogo asked darkly.

He preferred to go by Finnick, but that was probably not the best answer right now. Nick put on a show of trying to remember, as much as he already knew it was futile. "He was that one suspect in the Feral Dream case, right? The one with the drug van? My memory's a bit fuzzy…"

"Then let me remind you," Bogo said, pulling a thick file out of his desk and dropping it in front of him. "Mr. Chamberlain was not only a suspect you happened to arrest, but a former associate of yours. Of the 'legally adjacent' kind to be more specific. Does that ring a bell?"

Nick gaped, completely caught off-guard. He was expecting to get chewed out for the kidnapping, his altercation with Swinton, even his talk with Jimmy Frost,  _anything_ but this. Why did he have to find out  _now?_

"I suppose you're wondering why I brought this up, considering that incident was resolved over a week ago." Nick could only nod weakly. "That's because of  _this_ file." Bogo pulled out another file and set it next to the other one. "This is the case file for that incident, including all of the relevant evidence. Take a look."

Nick numbly reached out to grab the file. He had no idea where the chief was going with this, which only made it worse. The first thing he noticed was that this file was a lot thinner than the other one. In fact…

"It's empty." Nick opened up the file, only to see absolutely nothing inside. "I...I don't understand."

"Fascinating, isn't it? We just so happened to review the evidence for the Feral Dream case in light of this new murder and this is how we found it." Bogo jabbed a hoof into the empty folder. "Everything we had on that drug dealer just disappeared!"

"W-What?" Nick looked back and forth in disbelief, as if expecting to see a hidden camera somewhere. "Are you telling me the evidence was  _stolen?"_

"That's right. The documents, the packages, the interrogation tapes, even the damn  _van_ , gone. It was only a matter of time until that cat defending him caught wind of it and do you know what happened next? Do you know what  _happens_ when we lose all of our evidence?" Bogo asked, simmering with rage. "It means we had to let him walk!"

Nick swallowed. "Finnick...was released?"

"The little creep wasn't very humble about it either." Bogo shook his head in frustration. "I hate criminals, Wilde. The thought of someone getting away with something like this sickens me to the core. I won't stand for it."

That's when Nick pieced it together. Why Bogo had researched Finnick's connections, and why he had brought him here now. He felt a flash of anger surge through him to match the chief's own. "How about you just come out and say it," he growled. "You think  _I_ did this."

He didn't even hesitate. "You have to admit, it's a plausible conclusion."

"I wasn't even  _here_ that late! I left just before 11!"

"And can anyone back up that claim?"

Nick paused. "...No." He had made sure to slip out of the precinct without attracting any more attention. Clearly not a wise move in hindsight, especially when one of the witnesses who  _did_ see him here could testify that he had talked to Finnick shortly beforehand. Not good. "But you don't have any evidence that I  _did_ do it either!"

"Internal Affairs has already launched an investigation into the matter," Bogo explained. "And until that investigation is concluded, you are hereby suspended from duty. Turn in your badge."

Nick's breath hitched in his throat. " _Suspended?!"_

"Suspended!" Bogo's fists tightened, his glare getting fiercer than ever. "Know this, Wilde, I don't appreciate the legal system being made a mockery of, and  _especially_ not this precinct! You may have gotten into the force by the graces of Officer Hopps, but that will not save you if I  _ever_ catch you slipping up! Understand?"

Nick only felt himself getting more pissed off.  _I can't believe it. The chief doesn't just suspect me, he's practically treating it like a foregone conclusion!_

_Why so surprised, Nicholas? That's how it's always been for our kind, remember?_

_Huh. Inner voice is Dad now. That's new._

Nick clenched his necktie, pulled his badge from his pocket, and practically slammed it onto the desk. "Now you listen here-!"

It was probably for the best that he didn't get to finish that sentence. The office's intercom suddenly beeped loudly and the voice of Officer Clawhauser came through. "Uh, chief? There's a special guest here to see you."

"Tell him to wait!" Bogo shouted, slamming a finger down on the button while maintaining his glare with Nick. The fox gladly returned it, the two mammals practically nose to nose.

"I...really don't think I can…" Clawhauser answered nervously. "Can you please just...come down here?"

"NO!"

"But chief-!"

"Who is it?!" Bogo demanded, looking about ready to destroy the phone. "Who is  _so_ important that you need to interrupt me like this?!"

"Uh…" Clawhauser audibly gulped. "It might be better if you come see for yourself…"

* * *

_Reception Area_

_9: 07 AM_

"Are you feeling, alright?"

"I'd feel a lot better if you stopped asking me that."

Judy frowned at the hyena, the latter leaning up against the side of the elevator that Nick had entered. She tried to distract herself from worrying about Nick by making small-talk with Carla, who was woefully unsuited for it. Unfortunately, Jimmy wasn't exactly an option right now either...

"Such sad faces. Turn that frown upside down, señorita."

Judy's ears perked.  _That_ was definitely not Carla.

Turning around, Judy found two strange mammals standing in the middle of the lobby. One of them appeared to be a lion, concealed in a brown trench coat with a fedora covering his eyes. He just stood there, not saying a word, but being a significant presence regardless.

Yet the smaller of the two was even more noticeable. He was roughly the same height as Judy, but wore an oversized sombrero that compensated for it even more than her ears did. His body was wrapped in a brown poncho with black stripes, and as he looked up at her, she could see his tan fur and oddly-shaped whiskers that looked more like a curly mustache. He was such a distinct sight that she placed him instantly. "W-Wait a minute! You're-!"

"Sandcat Sanchez!" Carla snarled, pushing herself off of the wall as she bared her teeth at the feline. "What the hell are  _you_ doing here?!"

The lion gave a small growl of warning, but for all the hostility being thrown at him, Sanchez himself seemed remarkably unphased. "I knew I saw a familiar face! How has the ZPD been on you, Carla? I would hate for my old amiga to be...mistreated."

Judy's sharp ears picked up a distinct  _lack_ of sound. Looking around her, she saw that every officer in the area had completely stopped what they were doing, all staring in their direction. Even two officers carting in a muzzled jaguar froze on the spot, and so did the jaguar himself. The entire ZPD had come to a screeching halt.

Except Carla. "I'll mistreat your  _face_ , you little-!"

Judy quickly stepped in front of her. "Hold on! Starting a fight here isn't going to help anyone." She glanced nervously up at the lion again, who nodded threateningly in agreement. The hyena barely acknowledged her, glaring straight over Judy's head at the two felines.

"Such words of wisdom! I see why you are so highly regarded, Señorita Hopps." Without warning, Sanchez took Judy's paw in his own and bent down to kiss it. Carla snarled even louder behind her.

"Uh, t-thanks," Judy said, gently pulling her paw away. This whole thing was just surreal. Before they could even think about who the Count's next target could be, the Sahara Square crime lord waltzes right into their precinct and flirts with an officer without a care in the world.  _Is this the kind of power a crime lord wields? If so, we're in trouble if the Count gets any more of it._

"Can I ask why you are here, Mr. Sanchez?" she asked, getting back on track. "And your friend…?"

"El Orgullo," Carla muttered.

"Right. What brings you to the ZPD?"

Sanchez laughed, the brim of his hat tilting up just enough to glimpse his yellow eyes. "Oh, I think you could make a good guess." Judy bit her lip. What else  _could_ this be about other than the crime lord killings? Even so, his apparent knowledge about their involvement was more than a little unnerving.

But Carla wasn't having it. "I don't  _care_  why you're here, just get lost before I throw you out myself! Not necessarily in one piece." Several other ZPD officers gasped while El Orgullo bared his fangs. Judy knew she had to be a bit more forceful this time, lest something much worse break out.

"Now come here and-!" Carla looked behind her to see Judy holding her back by the tail. "What the heck, Hopps?!"

"I'm sorry Carla, but it's for your own good," Judy said, straining.

"I don't think so!" Carla made another move for Sanchez, dragging Judy along the tile floor, until the bunny reached for her cuffs. In a single, swift move, she attached one end to the leg of a bench, and the other to the leg of a furious hyena. "HEY!"

"Muchas gracias," said Sanchez, tipping his hat towards Judy. "To show my appreciation, I shall answer your burning question." He reached into his poncho for something, making Judy flinch and reach for her tranq gun.  _I should've known better than to let my guard down!_

Sanchez's arm emerged from under the poncho, now wielding...a violin. "I must sing for you a song of welcoming." With a strum of the violin, Sanchez began his recital, while El Orgullo accompanied him on a trumpet.

" _I greet you allllllllll, of the ZPDDDDDD!"_

" _I hope that yooooooou, will welcome meeeeeeeee!"_

" _It won't take loooooooong, I'll make it brieeeeeeeef!"_

" _But I come nooooooooow, to meet your chieeeeeeeeef!"_

As he gave one final strum of the violin, the room fell into silence once more, for a decidedly different reason. Even Carla was reduced to a quiet simmer.

"WOOO, good show!" Clawhauser clapped enthusiastically, attracting a few stares himself.

"Yes, yes, you are most kind, my feline compadre." Sanchez bowed. "Now, if you could send my message along…"

Clawhauser stared blankly, as if forgetting what his job was, before quickly calling the chief's office. Given that he was currently in a meeting, Judy knew that it wouldn't go over well, and could hear Bogo's irritated voice even from her current position. Soon enough, the cheetah put the phone down and smiled nervously as Bogo burst out of the office again. "Ola, chief of police! I would like to have the speaking with you!" Sanchez greeted, waving his sombrero towards him.

Bogo's expression shifted instantly, but not towards fearful reverence like most of the ZPD. If anything, he just looked annoyed instead of outright pissed. "Fine. Come on up. Wilde, get lost." Standing on her tiptoes, Judy could just barely see the top of Nick's head as he left the office and took the elevator back down.

Invariably, he ended up running right into Sanchez and El Orgullo as the elevator opened on the bottom floor. "So  _you_ are Señor Wilde," Sanchez said as he walked past him. "The apple does not fall far from the tree, no?" Judy wasn't sure what he meant by that, but judging by the look on Nick's face, it couldn't have been good. Sanchez's grinning face disappeared into the elevator as Nick stepped out.

"Great, one pendejo for another," said Carla, tugging at her leg cuff. "Think you can get this thing off of me now, Hopps?"

"Right, sorry." Judy quickly undid the cuff and let Carla loose.

"I don't know, that was a good look on her," Nick teased.

"I bet cuffs would look good on you too," she shot back.

To Judy's surprise, Nick actually looked a bit hurt by that comment, but just a bit. "What happened with the chief?" she asked, concerned.

He sighed and pinched his brow. "Finnick got released."

"That's great!" she smiled, which faltered when she noticed that his words didn't match his reaction. "That's... _not_ great?"

"Oh, it would be fan-freaking-tastic if not for the fact that he only got out because all of the evidence on him was stolen."

"Excuse me?!" Judy leapt onto Nick's chest, grabbing him by the tie. "Stolen?! From right under our noses?!" Such a heinous act went against everything she believed in. The law was supposed to keep people safe, not be abused for the whims of another! "Do they have any suspects?!"

"Yeah," Nick snorted. "Me."

Judy's heart sank, and she almost fell right off of Nick before catching herself. She shook her head slowly. "No way...they can't possibly think…"

"They don't have anything to prove it, but I'm not exactly getting the benefit of the doubt either. Bogo suspended me, pending investigation."

"Gee, I can't imagine why," Carla said unsympathetically.

"Not now!" Judy snapped at her, with enough force that the hyena's eyes widened and she backed down. "Nick, I'm not going to let them treat you like this. I'm going to march right up there and tell Bogo exactly what I think about-"

"That won't be necessary, Carrots." Last thing he wanted was for her to get in trouble over him. "Trying to change Bogo's opinion of me is a losing battle. There's just certain preconceptions you gotta deal with as a fox on the force. It's fine." It wasn't fine at all, which he failed to fully hide behind his emotional mask.

That was the last straw for Judy. Even Nick's principle of 'Never let them see that they get to you' was breaking under all the stress he was facing. As his partner and friend, she wasn't letting him stay like this a second longer. And the first step was finding out the whole truth. "Nick, you need to tell me what happened last night.  _Please_."

"I'm pretty curious to hear about this myself," said Carla. "I was hoping you'd at least be gone a  _little_ longer."

_Yes, son, let's hear what you've come up with. We're all waiting._

Nick ignored the persistent voice in his head and nodded, relieved to be on familiar ground again. "...I saw the murder."

That made Judy pause, her ears flattening. She had feared it was something like that and the confirmation didn't help. "What happened?" she repeated.

"When Felix brought me to Lady Lang, she was already dead," he explained, as solemnly as possible. "Murdered by that raccoon guy, Simon. Felix tried to attack him, but he ended up dead too. So I ran."

Judy nodded in understanding. That indeed lined up with what they knew so far, which wasn't much since the scene of the crime had been torched and no bodies were actually found. "And your phone?"

_That's right, what about the phone? How are you going to explain that one?_

"I saw it lying on the ground on my way out and snatched it up. I didn't even think about it at the time. If I had, I would've seen what they were trying to do…"

"What do you mean?"

"You don't get it?" he asked, shaking his head in mock-frustration. "They tried to frame me for the murder, Carrots. That's why they stole my phone and sent Jimmy all those incriminating texts."

"And why would they bother to do  _that?"_  Carla asked, suspicious as ever.

He shrugged. "The Count wants me for himself, remember? What better way to do that than to get me sent off to prison? We already know iron bars won't stop him from getting what he wants."

Nothing _will stop me from getting what I want._

"That makes sense," Judy said, pacing around as she put a finger to her chin. "And you were also the one who told the rest of us about the crime lords, piecing together where he would strike next. If not for that, we wouldn't have even been able to interfere. No wonder he wants you out of the way."

"Exactly!" Nick smiled. "But I guess Jimmy never told anyone else about the phone, so there wasn't enough evidence to incriminate me. That's why he must have arranged this incident with Finnick as well."

 _Hold on...I was just making that up, but what if he actually_ did?

 _Come now, you know Finnick will like it over here. I promise I'll take good care of him. Better than_  you _ever have._

Judy shook him out of his conflicting thoughts by suddenly wrapping herself around him in a hug. "Don't worry, Nick, I promise I won't let anything happen to you. I know how good of a mammal you really are." Carla rolled her eyes, but otherwise didn't protest.

Nick smiled softly, putting a paw on the back of Judy's head. "Thanks, Carrots. That means a lot."

As Judy smiled back, he somehow heard the sound of clapping from within his own mind.

_Impressive. A well-spun lie with just enough half-truths to support it. You even got your little bunny friend there to fill in the blanks. I see you've learned a lot from me._

_It's just to placate them for now. I'll find a way to deal with you, then I'll tell them the truth._

_Better find a way quickly then. You can't hide this forever. I won't let you._

_Don't tell me what I can't-_

"HOPPS! HYENANDEZ! BOTH OF YOU GET UP HERE  _NOW!"_

Once again, Chief Bogo had successfully derailed the conversation. "Sounds like the chief isn't buying whatever Sanchez is selling. Guess you better get going," Nick shot off quickly.

"Come with us," Judy requested.

He shrugged. "Can't. I'm not an officer anymore, remember? Besides, I'd rather not give Chief Buffalo Butt any more reason to hate me."

She sighed. "Alright. Just wait out here then. We'll try to settle this quickly. Let's go, Carla." The two females headed onto the elevator and moved up to the office, leaving Nick waiting below, idly watching them.

* * *

_Chief Bogo's Office_

_9: 21 AM_

As the officers filed into the room, they were greeted with the sight of Bogo hunched over his own desk, looking like he was desperately trying to stave off a complete meltdown. As if mocking him, Sandcat Sanchez sat in the chair in front of him, still as cheerful as ever, with El Orgullo leaning on the desk behind him. "Come in, come in! The fiesta is just getting started!"

If there  _had_  been a fiesta, Bogo was clearly hungover. "Let's just get this over with…"

"What's going on, chief?" Judy asked hesitantly. Carla shared in her confusion, though was still glaring at Sanchez.

"Why does everyone look so down?" the feline asked, looking around the room. "Perk up! It's nothing bad!"

"That is a matter of opinion," Bogo muttered.

Sanchez grinned even wider. "We struck a deal!"

Nobody liked the sound of that. "You're...gonna have to be a little more specific," Judy pressed.

"Gladly, señorita!" Sanchez hopped down from the chair and drew his violin once more. "I must sing for you a song of exposition."

"Hold on, I can explain!" Bogo cut in hurriedly. "You don't have to-!"

" _My fellow looooooords, they drop like fliiiiiiiies!"_

" _I must not beeeeeeee, the next who diiiiiiiiies!"_

" _So in exchaaaaaaange, for what I've fooooooooound!"_

" _You shall keep meeeeeeeee, all safe and sooooooooound!"_

There was no silence after  _this_ song.

"You want us to  _protect you?!"_ Carla yelled, having to be restrained again by Judy. "HELL NO!"

"Carla, what are you talking about?" Judy asked, struggling to hold on to her. "That's exactly what we've been  _trying_ to do!"

"For Lady Lang, sure, but not  _this_ gilipollas!"

"Such harsh words, Carla." Sanchez put a paw to his chest as if deeply hurt. "What have I done to earn such hostility?"

"YOU KNOW DAMN WELL WHAT!" Carla began thrashing even harder, shaking Judy back and forth.

"Officer Hyenandez, please refrain from adding to my migraine," Bogo growled, rubbing his forehead. "Hopps, I give you full authority to tranq her if necessary."

That finally made Carla stop struggling, but she showed her defiance by going to stand in the corner with her arms crossed, scowling at everyone else.

"I'm not any happier with this arrangement than you are," Bogo said, earning a scoff from Carla. "But Hopps is right, this is the best way we're going to catch whoever is behind all of this."

From outside the room, another ear was focused on this conversation. Nick casually leaned against the wall, staring at his phone, so that any onlookers would think he was checking his messages and certainly  _not_ eavesdropping. Like heck he was going to settle for just waiting around. He had to admit, he  _was_ curious, and frankly didn't want to risk missing out on anything else that would make his day even worse.

Good thing too, because this sounded pretty troubling.

"So what exactly are  _we_ getting out of this?" Carla snapped. "Aside from making life more difficult for an even worse criminal?"

Bogo glared, though he didn't exactly disagree with her view. "As Mr. Sanchez just stated in his...performance...he has valuable information on this enemy that he will grant us in return."

"What kind of information?"

"Information on the Count, the mastermind behind these heinous attacks," Sanchez replied, shaking his head with a 'tut tut tut'. "Surely, you would have no problem with learning such information, si? It's not as if you'd have any way of finding out otherwise."

Nick almost dropped his phone, fighting not to show how freaked out he was.

 _He knows! He freaking_ knows!

_I'm only hidden when I want to be, son._

"That's great!" Judy cried, oblivious to Nick's inner turmoil. "Sounds like things are finally looking up for us. Nick's gonna be so relieved to hear about this...do you hear something?"

Nick quickly ceased slamming his head against the wall.

"I can't believe everyone is just going along with this," Carla growled.

Sanchez casually walked over to her, making everyone else tense up. "Now now, Carla, can't we just let the bygones be bygones? Can't you smell a good opportunity when it presents itself?"

"The only thing I smell is your cheap cologne," she snapped.

"Do you like it?" he asked, pulling out a small, purple bottle. "It is called 'Rasguno de Gato'. I am quite fond of it personally."

"Perfume preferences aside, do you mind explaining how this is going to work?" asked Bogo, getting increasingly impatient.

Sanchez whirled around, grinning. "Why of course! I would be happy too!"

" _Without_ a song!"

His grin faltered slightly. "...Very well. It is quite simple. I have a few more arrangements to make and then I shall call you to my humble abode. So keep those big ears out for me, Señorita Hopps."

Nick suppressed a groan.  _I'm trying to keep her_ away  _from the problem, not send her headlong into it!_

 _Don't worry, I won't hurt her too badly. Maybe just_ one  _missing foot will teach her not to push her luck._

He had heard enough. Sanchez wasn't going to spill anything more and Nick wasn't going to just stand here and let Brain Dad keep taunting him about it. He forced himself away from the office and headed back down.

"Shouldn't we get started as soon as possible?" Judy asked.

"The concern is appreciated, but it will be no problemo. My own associates can handle the job until I am ready."

She frowned, but relented. Even for a crime lord, she couldn't help but be worried about him. All life was precious, even if Carla didn't seem to agree. "Alright, if you say so. How many squads are you looking for exactly?"

"Uno. Yours."

"J-Just ours?!"

"I'm not wasting any significant portion of the ZPD's resources on a crime lord when I  _could_ be using them to protect law-abiding citizens instead," Bogo answered. "Besides, your squad knows the most about this case, and seems to get involved in it whether I want you to or not."

Judy winced, remembering that they technically weren't supposed to be investigating the Lady Lang incident in the first place. "Point taken."

"Excelente!" Sanchez shouted gleefully. "Then I shall see all of you lovely mammals later." El Orgullo followed after him as he walked out of the office.

"At least he's gone for now," Carla grumbled.

"Oh, I almost forgot!" Sanchez abruptly turned back to face them, now holding his violin. "I must sing for you a song of parting."

" _Our time is shooooooort, it could not laaaaaaaaast-"_

Carla slammed the door in his face. "Short indeed."

"Finally, some peace and quiet." Bogo sighed in relief. "Now, all of you get out of my office. You heard the cat, he'll call you when he needs you."

"So what, we  _work for him_ now?!" Carla protested.

"Until this matter is settled, yes," he said firmly. "If he tries to get you to do anything shady, let us know, but otherwise your squad is responsible for Mr. Sanchez's well-being."

"This  _whole thing_ is shady!" Carla stepped closer, snarling up at him.

"Carla!" Judy stopped her again. Even for the hyena, this kind of temper was way out of line. "I don't know what went on between you and Sanchez, but-"

She turned to glare at her with such intensity that it stopped her in her tracks. "That's right. You  _don't_ know." Storming right past the bunny, Carla pulled open the door herself and slammed it again behind her.

Just like that, Judy was alone with Chief Bogo. "Officer Hopps-"

"Sorry, sorry! I'm leaving now!" she said frantically, about to bolt for the door.

"Just one thing," he stopped her. "I want to make it clear that the details of your assignment are only to be shared with the rest of your squad."

"Of course, sir. That's proper protocol."

"Only  _active_ members of your squad, you understand?" he asked intently.

Meaning non-suspended ones. "O-Oh…yes, I understand."

"Good. Now leave."

Judy wasted no more time in doing so. That could have gone better, but at least they had a plan now. With Nick cut out of the loop though, there was still one member of the squad she had to get up to speed.

And she didn't just mean about Sanchez either.

* * *

_Broom Closet_

_10: 11 AM_

"So you're _sure_  you can't tell me what that was about?" Nick asked casually, sucking on a lollipop as he followed his partner down the hallway.

"I...I'm sorry, I can't," Judy answered, unable to hide how much that hurt her. She felt awful having to keep this from Nick when he had just been so open with her.

"Then what exactly are you taking me to see Jimmy for?

"You'll see…"

If there was any positive to this situation, it was that even the rest of the squad essentially had the day off, knowing that Sanchez could call them at any time. On the other paw, Nick and Judy both started to miss the days when they could just go out on patrol together as partners. No trainees, no crime lords, no conspiracies. Those were simpler times, and simplicity was looking very appealing right about now.

"Jimmy, are you awake yet?" Judy lightly rapped against the door of the closet.

"Has he seriously been in there all night?" Nick asked incredulously. "Wouldn't the janitor have thrown him out or something?"

"The janitor felt too sorry for him." Judy tried the knob, only to find it locked. "Jimmy, please, we need to talk."

"Allow me," Nick sighed, casually moving Judy out of the way as he stepped up to the door. He reached into the back of his tie and pulled out two metal pins hidden there (hey, you never knew when these could come in handy). Inserting the pins into the keyhole, it only took him a few seconds to pick the lock. He hesitantly turned the knob and pushed open the door.

"Nick...is that you?" the timid voice inside asked.

Judy gasped and even Nick couldn't keep the shock off of his face. "Yeah, it's me...but I'm not sure I can say the same for  _you."_

Jimmy Frost looked like a complete mess. Huddled up in the corner, the arctic fox was dirty and disheveled, clutching Wallace tightly as he stared up at them through baggy, watery eyes. "...What do you mean?"

_So how's that plan not to hurt him working out for you?_

_I didn't mean for it to turn out like this!_

_Please. You must have known he would find out eventually. How did you_ think _he would react to knowing his idol lied to his face?_

"Don't worry about that," Judy said, and Nick took a second to realize she wasn't talking to him. The bunny walked over to Jimmy and put a paw on his shoulder in comfort. "Nick here wants to tell you something, isn't that right, Nick?" She looked up at him hopefully, signaling for him to clean up his mess.

Jimmy's attention went straight to Nick, his fragile little heart probably expecting him to tell him yesterday was just a misunderstanding, that he was still the good mammal Jimmy thought him to be, that he could still trust him.

Nick nodded in understanding. He opened his mouth and tried to tell him the same story he'd fed to Judy.

Nothing came out.

"Nick, what's wrong?" Judy asked, urging him on. "Please, just tell him."

 _I...I can't do it. I can't just lie to him_ again!

_If you can lie once, you can lie a hundred times. It's in your blood._

"Nick?" Jimmy asked, tearing up again. "Why aren't you saying anything?"

_End of the road, Nicholas. What are you going to do?_

Nick looked to Judy, then to Jimmy, then just shook his head. "I'm sorry."

He closed the door on them.

"Nick!" Judy rushed right to the door and tried to chase after him, but it still wouldn't open for her. The door remained stuck not by a lock, but by a hastily placed chair on the outside. "Darn it! Jimmy, stand back!" Judy took a few paces backwards, then charged forward, landing a flying kick on the door with both feet.

The door buckled a little but didn't open, leaving the lagomorph with very sore feet. "Ugh...come on Jimmy, I need your help."

"What good could  _I_ do?" He sighed morosely as he looked down at Wallace and gently stroked his head. "I'm no help to anyone. That's probably why Nick ran away."

"I don't know why he did that," she admitted, "but we're not going to find out just sitting in here. Let's go!"

He shook his head, not even looking at her. "Just leave me here with all the rest of the junk."

Judy trembled, both in sorrow and anger. Nick had a  _lot_ of explaining to do for this! Turning back to the door, she slammed and kicked it again and again, no matter  _how_  much it hurt. She needed to get out of here! For the sake of their investigation  _and_ their partnership, she had to find him.

With one final crash, Judy fell right through the door and onto her shoulder. Unsurprisingly, Nick was nowhere in sight. Groaning to herself in pain, she forced herself back up, not willing to stop there. Taking one last look back at Jimmy, Judy reluctantly left one fox behind to seek out another.

* * *

_Reception Area_

_10: 18 AM_

"Wow, Gazelle's holding a concert  _tonight?!"_ Clawhauser squealed, clutching his phone in his oversized paws. "Aw shucks, I've got a late shift. Maybe I could ask the chief for the night off. I still have that 'incriminating evidence' on him." He smacked himself on the nose playfully. "Oh, you bad kitty, don't you have naughty thoughts like that!" Really, he was pretty sure at least half the force secretly had that app. And if not, they  _should._

"Where is he?!" Clawhauser reeled back as Judy leapt onto his desk once again. "Where's Nick?!"

Clawhauser mentally redacted his first impression of this bunny. She was most certainly  _not_ cute right now. "Nick? H-He just left. He's, well, not working right now, so I didn't think anything of it…"

Judy immediately pulled out her phone and dialed his number, foot tapping in time with the rings. After three failed attempts to reach him, she gave up on that course of action. "Do you know where he went?" she asked Clawhauser.

The cheetah shrugged. "Home, I think. That's all he said. And he said it all... _ommminousssllllllly."_

"His home?" Judy paused. She had never  _been_ to Nick's house before. Anytime she even brought the idea up, he would brush it off, telling her the place was a mess and not worth the trip. After getting to know him better, she started to think that he simply didn't want her intruding on his privacy, which she was willing to respect...until now. "Give me his address."

Nick missing, Carla enraged, Jimmy depressed, and here she was desperately trying to keep everyone together. How had they gone from such a strong, cohesive unit to... _this?_

* * *

_Rainforest District_

_1955 Cypress Grove Lane_

_10: 56 AM_

Judy's first impression was that the place really  _was_ a mess.

She knew Nick didn't want her pity, but as she stepped off of the Zuber and in front of his dilapidated house, which looked about as old and decrepit as her Pop-Pop, she just couldn't help it. With the kind of money he once claimed to have made, was this really the best he could afford? Or did he turn down more lucrative options in favor of this isolated spot in the middle of nowhere? He valued his privacy indeed to live in a literal cabin in the woods.

"Stay focused, Judy. You have a job to do." After all, she didn't know when Sanchez would come knocking and Bogo would give her hell if she wasn't prepared. There was no time to lose.

She walked up to the rickety front door and knocked. "Nick?" No response. She knocked again. "Nick, I'm not mad at you. I just want to know what's going on. Please let me in." She knocked a third time, a bit harder, and was surprised to see the door open on its own. It had been left unlocked. That was odd of him, to say the least.

Stepping slowly inside the house, Judy took a few sniffs of the air. Her sense of smell wasn't nearly as good as Nick's, but she could tell he had been here recently.  _Very_ recently. He had indeed come home, but didn't stick around for very long.

She almost rushed right out again before realizing that she didn't have any other clues as to where he'd gone. Any clues to be found would probably be here. As much as she wasn't fond of rummaging through Nick's things without his permission, desperate times called for desperate measures.

But it didn't take long for her decision to become moot. As soon as she started looking around, she found a plainly-visible piece of paper sitting on his bed, placed right on top of Nick's discarded police uniform. That was way too conspicuous to be just another part of the mess in here. She slowly walked over to the note and picked it up.

_Dear Carrots,_

She almost dropped it right there. It figured that Nick would have expected her to come here. But why leave a note? Why couldn't he just talk to her?

Only one way to find out. She took a deep breath and continued reading the note.

_Dear Carrots,_

_Guess I might as well just come out and say it. I've been lying to you._

Judy blinked. She didn't understand. Hadn't he already admitted this to her?

_I know what you're thinking, but I'm afraid the truth I told you to explain my lie was also a lie, and that's the truth. The Count didn't try to frame me for the murder and I didn't steal my phone back. He gave it to me._

_And he gave it to me because the Count is kind of...my father._

She actually did drop the note this time. "Oh, sweet cheese and parentage." How does one even  _react_ to something like that? It would be like if the Night Howler case ended with her finding out that Bonnie and Stu had secretly planned the whole thing as some elaborate scheme to keep her away from Zootopia.

...No, that was just silly. The only thing she could do now was keep reading.

_Wow, feels like I took a massive weight off my shoulders just writing that. I bet it's pretty clear now why I couldn't just come right out and tell you about this. I know you just want to help me, but it's too late for that now. By the time you read this, I'll already be on my way to where I'm pretty sure dear ol' dad is hiding out. The only place he would go if he's expecting me, which I guarantee you he is. I'm not telling you where because I know the first thing you'll do is come chasing after me. I appreciate the sentiment, really I do. I've never met anyone who's cared as much about me as you, Judy._

"Nick..." Her paws clenched, crumpling the note. "Of  _course_  I want to help you. Why couldn't you just  _let_  me…?"

_But you need to understand, my dad is dangerous. VERY dangerous. I know you think the ZPD can stop any criminal if they just try hard enough, but not this one. He is the single most talented con artist I have ever known and he only taught me a fraction of his skills before he left. He knows how mammals THINK, Judy. What they want, what they'll do to get it, everything that makes them tick. Any plan you come up with to stop him, he'll have ten more to counter it, plus another two just for kicks._

_Look, I know you're worried and I don't blame you, but please just let me take care of this. I can't let anyone else get hurt on this investigation because of me and my twisted past. This is one mess I have to clean up on my own. I'll repeat that just for emphasis: DO NOT COME AFTER ME!_

_Yeah, like that's going to stop you. Just try not to get yourself killed on me, alright? I don't need any more blood on my paws._

_Well, the cab's almost made it home and I think the driver's gonna want his pen back, so I'll wrap it up here. Tell Jimmy I'm sorry, okay? I told him I was a bad role model, but he just wouldn't listen. Who knows, maybe you're ALL better off without me._

_Best regards,_

_Your dumb fox._

Judy didn't realize she was crying until the signature became stained with tears. "What, that's it?! You pull something like this and all you have to show for it is some tacky note?!" She crumpled the note into a ball and chucked into the wall as hard as she could. Being made of paper, it just bounced off harmlessly, but it at least made her feel a  _little_ better.

Like heck she was going to just sit back and watch as Nick headed towards certain danger. Even if the Count, his dad, she reminded herself, wasn't going to hurt him, she couldn't take that chance, especially if he was going to end up caught in the crossfire between them and Sanchez's thugs.

_Or maybe you're afraid he just won't come back._

Judy shook her head fiercely. She couldn't afford to have thoughts like that, not now! She needed to find Nick, that much was clear.

But how? He had deliberately cut off her only lead and now she had no other option than to return to the ZPD, exactly as he wanted her to. Considering the circumstances though, they probably wouldn't be able to put much effort into finding him right now, and a part of her doubted they would even be able to at all. "I guess I can at least bring them this," she sighed, going to retrieve the tossed note.

But as she bent down to pick it up again, her eyes caught sight of something on the nightstand. It appeared to be a picture of Nick and his parents. Seeing the adorable smile on the young fox's face, she couldn't help but smile. "Awww, at least he used to have a normal life with his folks. Shame that one of them is a murderous crime lord and the other is…"

Wait a minute.

" _Okay, let me set the record straight. My mom is fine. She lives in a place called Happytown, do not let the name fool you, in the same apartment complex that I used to live in myself."_

Nick's mom, the only other link to him and his past, was living somewhere in this "Happytown" place. Grabbing the picture frame, Judy glanced at the smiling vixen once more.

If  _her_ Wilde didn't want to open up, maybe it was time to ask another.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How's THAT for a cliffhanger? After bringing in Nick's dad a few chapters ago, it was only a matter of time before Mom had to join in too. Still gonna be a bit before that big meeting comes to fruition, but we promise it will be worth it. As for Nick himself, he'll be okay...probably.
> 
> Once again, Nick's descent into darkness was the hardest part to write, made more fun by turning his inner monologue into a facsimile of Reynard. Not even his own mind is safe anymore. We'll leave it ambiguous for now exactly what became of Finnick, but you probably have a pretty good idea.
> 
> But the highlight of this chapter (for us at least) was the introduction of Sandcat Sanchez, a character who has been relentlessly teased for a damn long time and is now finally stepping into the spotlight. And what a spotlight it is! He and Count Reynard are now in competition not just for who gets control of Sahara Square, but for who is the most fun character to write. It's going to be a heated competition indeed.
> 
> In honor of Mr. Sanchez, we'd like to propose a new question for you all: What songs do you find most appropriate for Born to Be Wilde (aside from the obvious)? As per usual, we'll post the results next chapter.


	18. The Stones of Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, for those not yet aware, our compilation series "Born to Be Drabbles" is now up and running. We're going to try to keep that updated on a somewhat consistent basis to have some correlation to what's going on in the main story. (A03 Disclaimer: Not here it's not, but that will be next up!)
> 
> Now let's actually get back to the main story! This begins the Sanchez arc, which in all honesty, might end up being our personal favorite of the whole shebang. Let's see if anyone agrees when all is said and done. :)
> 
> Special thanks to Upplet for being an extra beta reader on this chapter.

****

**Chapter 18: The Stones of Home**

_An Unknown Place_

_An Unknown Time_

"So we're all agreed then?"

The room was silent as the four other mammals stared back. Seated in large, red chairs were Simon VanDal, Lucy Sang, Harvey Montapue, and the imposing figure simply known as Koslov. Though "seated" wasn't entirely accurate as Lucy was actually perched on one of the chair's arms and Koslov had broken his entirely, now sitting on the deceased furniture's remains. Facing them at his desk was a grinning Count Reynard.

"What do you mean?" Simon asked, exasperated. "You literally just explained your plan and then assumed we all agreed with it."

"Don't you? I'd think you would know better by now," Reynard replied. His eyes idly wandered over his desk, which contained such wonders as a half-eaten blueberry muffin, a dead ficus plant, multiple colored pens spread out erratically, a manilla folder labeled "H.B.", and a plastic bobblehead of himself, which he flicked. "Survey says that 3 out of 5 crime lords agree that my plans are effective. Maybe you should stop being such a Doubting Danny."

"The Count knows what he speaks," Koslov agreed, nodding.

"Well, how could I argue with  _you_ , big guy?" asked Lucy.

"You cannot."

"It was a rhetorical question," she huffed. "Fine, I'll go along with it, but I still maintain that you're pushing your luck, Reynard."

"Noted. Sparky?"

"Do I get to burn burn burn things?"

"Sure."

"I'm in!"

Simon grunted, realizing he was the only one left. "I am quickly losing patience with this. When am I going to see some progress on  _my_ goal?"

"It's a necessary delay, given the circumstances." Reynard shrugged. "You must agree that once we control the entire criminal underworld, it will be a simple task to fulfill my end of the bargain."

He scowled. "Funny how much priority you give  _your_ family over  _mine_."

"Ugh! Come on, Simon, just say yes already or he'll  _never_ shut up," Lucy groaned, a wing over her face.

"She's right, I won't."

"Hmph." The raccoon nodded reluctantly.

"Good!" Reynard smiled, standing up abruptly. "Now then, as we're all going to be a bit spread apart this time, let's assign code names as an extra safety measure." He stepped out from behind the desk and approached his henchmammals, withdrawing a hand of five playing cards from his sleeve and holding them out. "Pick a card, any card."

No one bothered to question it. One by one, they came up and took a card from his paw, reading them out.

"Ace of Spades," Simon muttered, crumpling the card and throwing it over his shoulder.

"Queen of Diamonds," Lucy giggled. "Guilty as charged."

"Jack Jack Jack of Hearts," said Harvey, setting fire to the card with a blowtorch.

"King of Clubs," Koslov read.

Reynard smirked, flipping over the remaining card to reveal a Joker. "And you will refer to me as Wilde Card. Got it?" He received simultaneous groans in response.

There was a loud pounding sound, coming from across the room. "Sounds like our guest of honor has arrived. Care to let him in, Ice Bear?" Koslov nodded and his footsteps thumped loudly as he lumbered over to the front door.

Seeing the curious looks from his cohorts, Reynard could only laugh.  _It's finally time. Oh, how I've missed having another fox to talk to._

* * *

_Rainforest District_

_1955 Cypress Grove Lane_

_11: 14 AM_

For a long time, Judy just stayed there, sitting on top of Nick's bed and staring at the picture of his family. The family she intended to seek help from...and also the family she intended to put a stop to. How's  _that_  for a conflict of interest? If  _she_ was this torn up about it, it must have been a hundred times worse for Nick.

She glanced down at her phone. If she was going to make this call, she needed to do it now. Even if it was probably the last thing the chief wanted to hear. Steeling herself as best she could, Judy dialed the number.

 _"Welcome to the ZPD, this is Benjamin Clawhauser speaking! How may I brighten up your-oh, hey Judy! Did you find Nick?"_  He must have noticed her caller ID.

"Not...exactly…" she sighed, pinching her brow. "Can you patch me through to Chief Bogo?"

_"Uh...not sure you really want to be talking to him right now. He's being a total sourpuss. Like, even more than usual."_

Judy forced herself to stay resolute. "I know. Just...please."

_"Alrighty then. Don't say I didn't warn you."_

There was a buzzing sound as the phone changed lines, and then the cheetah's warm, friendly voice, was replaced with the total opposite.  _"What do you want, Hopps?"_

She subconsciously sat up a little, as if she were right there in the chief's office. She might as well have been. "Chief Bogo, we have a situation."

 _"Oh goodie, another one,"_  he drawled.  _"What is it this time?'_

"It's Nick, sir. He's...gone."

_"Did you miss the memo, Hopps? I suspended him."_

That reminder stung even more than the verbal jab at her memory. "I...I know, sir. That's not what I meant. I went to his house and-"

 _"You're at his_ house?!" he interrupted.  _"You have an important mission today and you're spending your prep time fraternizing with a co-worker? Maybe the sorry sod isn't home because you keep shoving your nose into his business!"_

Okay,  _that_ one hurt. "Actually, he left a note. He's...he's going after the Count."

 _"He's_ what?!" Judy flinched. She really hoped she wasn't just making this worse for him.  _"Why the hell would he do that?!"_

And here was the hard part. "...I don't know, sir. That's all the note said." To say that she understood Nick's perspective on this was an understatement. Telling Bogo about Nick's dad was out of the question right now. The chief could very well decide to fire him on the spot for keeping that from him, unfair as that was, and then there would be little point trying to save him in the first place.

Her investigative instincts were still on point though. The note was the only evidence that she knew more than she was letting on and she had already destroyed it.

 _"Wilde, Wilde, Wilde…"_  he chanted to himself. Judy could practically  _feel_ his anger threatening to fry the phone lines. _"Any idea where he went?"_

"No, sir." That, unfortunately, was not a lie.

 _"He should consider himself lucky he's not here right now. Fine, I suppose what he does on his off time is his own problem."_  Judy almost gasped. Did he seriously just say that? Nick could be in grave danger right now! Had the chief really lost  _that_  much trust in him?

It was now or never. "Chief Bogo, I am hereby requesting permission to go after him."

 _"Absolutely not! You have a job to do, Hopps! I can't afford to let you go gallivanting off at a time like this! Not to chase after some_   _oaf who's probably just slacking off!"_

It was then that something snapped inside of Judith Laverne Hopps. She was used to getting yelled at by the chief, that didn't bother her, but he had insulted her friend and partner one too many times. Suddenly, her usual deference to authority just didn't matter anymore.

"Some things are more important than a job."

_"Excuse me?!"_

"I  _said_ , some things are more important than a job," she repeated firmly. "I am  _going_ to rescue my partner, with or without your approval!"

She heard no response. Bogo had been stunned into silence, but she knew it wouldn't last. She had already said what she'd needed to. Staying on any longer would be a waste of time. "I will accept whatever punishment you see fit, but for now, I'm going to bring Nick home. Good day, sir."

 _"Wait! Hopps, you-!"_  She hung up.

Judy felt like she wanted to hurl. She couldn't believe she had just told off the chief. Anxious as she was though, she didn't regret it in the slightest. After what he had done to Nick already, she even felt justified taking him down a peg. If she had stood up for him like that back at the office, maybe this all could have been avoided. But no use dwelling on it any longer when she had a fox to save. She could make it up to him later.

Judy put the family picture back on the nightstand, her eyes trained on the vixen smiling back at her. Nick's mother, her key to finding the truth. Thanks to Nick, she had a general idea of where she was, but she still needed an address. That would be no problem. Nearly every citizen of Zootopia had a registered address in the ZPD database, so all she had to do was call Clawhauser and...and…

Judy slapped her forehead. Hard. She couldn't call the ZPD again, not after that!  _Now_ what was she going to do?

_So this is what shooting yourself in the foot feels like._

* * *

_Savannah Central_

_Zootopia Police Department - Precinct 1_

_11: 36 AM_

"So let me get this straight, now Hopps is off the case too?"

"Don't blame me for  _that_ one," Bogo grunted from behind his desk. "She's gone running off after Wilde, who apparently went vigilante on us. I don't know what she sees in that fox sometimes."

"You're telling me," said Carla, shaking her head. "Okay, so what happens to the mission now?"

"The mission is unchanged."

She blanched. "Are you serious?! I'm the only one left now!"

"Wrong. You still have Officer Frost," Bogo stated, pointing out of the office.

"In the loosest possible sense of the word. The guy's even more useless than Wilde right now!"

The chief leaned over the desk to glower down at her. "Then fix it! I have got enough on my plate right now without having to deal with insubordination from  _every_  corner! So go ahead and keep testing my patience, Hyenandez. See what happens!"

Carla had to fight down every instinct of a female hyena that told her to go for his throat, perhaps literally. "...Alright. In that case, I'm leaving  _now._ Better than sitting around here doing absolutely nada."

"I'm glad we've reached an agreement," Bogo said, forcing a smile. "Now g-"

"Get out. Yeah, I got it." Carla stormed out of the office and slammed the door. Again. Good thing it had been built to withstand a pissed-off water buffalo or it never would have survived.

Still sputtering to herself angrily, she made a beeline for the broom closet she knew Jimmy Frost had barricaded himself behind and unhesitantly busted her way in.

The arctic fox sat up with a start. "C-Carla? What are you doing here?"

"I'm here to collect you," she said, leaning against the door frame. "We have a job to do and I'm not going to be the only one left to handle it. So let's go."

"What job?"

"Oh right, you've been too much of a sad sack to notice." Carla sighed, starting to wonder why she even bothered. "I'll explain on the way. Now come on!"

"What's the point? I'll just ruin everything again." He hunched up in the corner, keeping his eyes squarely on his feet. "And I think my toeclaws need trimming…"

Growling lowly, Carla stomped into the closet. She came out a few seconds later, dragging Jimmy by the tail with little effort. A few other officers turned to stare at them as they passed by, which Carla returned with a fierce glare. "What are you looking at?! I'm just training the rookie! This is normal!"

"Uh...Carla, you're a rookie too," Jimmy pointed out whilst being dragged, his arms wrapped around the fluffy form of Wallace.

"But at least I know the meaning of this uniform," she countered, not even looking back at him. "What kind of officer are you, letting something like this hold you back? Suck it up!"

"But I failed! I don't deserve to-OWW!"

Carla had squeezed his tail. "What, you think failure makes you unworthy? If I had  _that_ attitude, I never would have made it through the academy! Consider it an honor to even be given that badge, don't go spitting on it!"

Jimmy wisely shut up after that, letting Carla continue to pull him out of the building while his claws grinded against the tile. At least his toeclaws weren't an issue anymore.

"Aw crap, I forgot," Carla fumed. Jimmy looked up at her, the hyena now focused on the parking lot. "We don't have a car anymore."

"What, you mean the one that you crashed?"

"I didn't crash it! A giant wolf jumped onto the dashboard and punched me through the window!"

"Oh. Okay then." She shot a curious glance at the fox, who she'd expected a much stronger reaction from. Clearly, he still wasn't 100% again.  _Even after one of_  my _pep talks? How dare he!_

"Come on, we're taking the bus," she growled, throwing Jimmy (and Wallace) over her shoulder and carrying them out towards the bus stop.

"I...I can walk myself."

" _Can you?"_ she shot back.

He chose not to argue. "So, uh, where are you taking me exactly?"

"Home." Carla looked wistfully out into the distance. "I am taking you home."

* * *

_City Hall_

_12: 07 PM_

With the ZPD an unfavorable option for now, Judy switched to Plan B. Thankfully, she still had friends in City Hall, just different ones.

Such as the eccentric chocolate-colored rabbit that darted into her path as soon as he saw her. Assistant Mayor Sunny "Lucky" Lapinson was the result of a strategic political maneuver that aimed to win the votes of the rabbit community, one of the largest and most influential communities in all of mammalkind. Dressed in a button-up shirt and suspenders with a carrot-shaped bowtie, he was the perfect picture of an assistant mayor.

And of an authority-loving dork. "Officer Hopps! It's an honor to see you again!" Sunny grinned and saluted her, forgetting about the stack of folders he was carrying as they all fell to the ground. "Oops."

"Here, let me help." Judy tried to ignore how familiar this felt as she bent down and helped him out. It had taken her weeks just to stop being suspicious of him, until she reminded herself of her own lesson not to judge others by their species, or in this case, profession.

"Thanks," he said shyly, looking away. Probably because he was too flattered or something. She idly wondered if this was how Nick felt around Jimmy. "Are you here to see the mayor?"

"I am," she confirmed, relieved he was sticking to business. "Can you let him know I'm here?"

"No need. You can just go in with the others," he shrugged, hefting his supply back up again.

"Others?"

"Yeah, those other ZPD officers that came in." He looked at her curiously. "You  _are_ with them, right?"

Judy told herself not to panic. Had the ZPD followed her here? No, the news couldn't have spread that quickly, and even if it had, there was no way they could have gotten here first. Now was not the time to be paranoid. "Yeah, i-it's fine. I'll just go on in." Well, she certainly had to  _now._

"Great, great," Sunny smiled, perking up again. He tapped his foot, awkwardly trying to end the conversation. "Erm...I'll see you around!" Judy merely blinked and the other rabbit zipped out of the hallway in an instant.

At least she wouldn't have to wait any longer to see the mayor, but that didn't stop Judy from hesitantly standing outside his office anyway. How was she going to explain this to the other officers? She mentally kicked herself for not asking Sunny what they were here for.

It was a moot point though, as just before she could grab the handle, the door opened in front of her. "Judy? What are you doing here?" asked Officer Wolford, a gloomier than usual McHorn behind him.

"Oh! Uh…I'm here to investigate a case." Which was technically true.

Fortunately, they didn't seem to have any idea what she was really up to as McHorn just nodded. "So are we. We were hoping the mayor would be able to provide some insight about our missing prosecutor."

Right, the missing prosecutor from Savannah Central. She had forgotten all about that case. It didn't seem the two of them were having much luck either, considering they had been working this same case over a week ago. Still, she couldn't help but ask. "Did he?"

"Yeah, he sure did…" Wolford rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably.

Judy paused, waiting for more. "And?"

"Er…" He struggled to say anything else.

"Hey, Wolford, I think your wife's calling you," McHorn said suddenly.

"I think you're right!" he said loudly, reaching for his phone. "Yep, definitely calling me! Sorry, I gotta take this!  _Outside!"_

They didn't really think they could fool  _her_ ears, did they? But they weren't the only ones withholding information, so she could hardly blame them. "No problem. I'll see you guys back at the station."  _Assuming Bogo lets me in again that is._

The wolf smiled in relief, giving her a small wave as he and McHorn passed her by, leaving the rabbit standing at the mayor's door.

_No more distractions. Time to get to the bottom of this._

Knowing she had better get moving before the mayor found something else to distract him, Judy quickly pushed herself through the large double doors.

"Mayor Manchas, I need to speak with you!" The neatly-dressed panther looked up from his desk, probably surprised to get another guest so quickly.

How a limo driver had become mayor of Zootopia she still didn't quite understand. She knew that he'd been inspired by her and Nick's efforts to restore the city and wanted to do his own part to make the world a better place. As a former Night Howler victim, he drew up a large number of votes from those who sympathized with his cause, and the rest was a bunch of political mumbo jumbo that Nick understood a lot better than her. He even slyly suggested that his mob connections had helped boost him to victory, but that couldn't be true...right?

"Officer Hopps, what a lovely surprise. But I've told you before that you can just call me Renato."

"And I've told  _you_ before that you can just call me Judy," she teased, smiling as she hopped into the chair across from him.

"Of course, of course. It's been a while since you and your partner have come by, you know." He looked back and forth, tilting his head to compensate for his scarred eye. "Where  _is_ Nick anyway? He's not still sour about me trying to, well,  _eat you_ , is he?"

Yes, actually, and he probably wouldn't approve of her coming here now. "He has trust issues," she said simply, and boy did she know  _that_ for a fact. "That's actually why I'm here. He's...missing."

"Missing?" Manchas shuddered a bit, recalling the time when  _he_ had been missing. "I'm sorry to hear that, but I don't see what I can do…"

"I need an address," Judy said. "For Nick's mother. I'd go to the ZPD, but things are...tense there right now."

"Hmmm, indeed, my resources could certainly find her for you, but may I ask why?"

"I'm trying to find out more about him," she admitted, feeling guilty for having to resort to this. "I know going behind his back to find his mother might not be the most ethical move, but...I'm worried about him. And I need to know what's really going on here."

"I see." Manchas smiled, nodding. "Don't worry, you are doing the right thing. Of that I am certain."

"Thanks," she said, not so certain.

"I can get Sunny to search our databases for you. He's much quicker than I. Any idea where to look?" he asked, already reaching for the intercom.

"Yeah. Nick said she's living somewhere in a place called Happytown."

His finger froze. "Happytown?"

"...Yes," she said hesitantly, unnerved by the sudden concern on his face.

"And you're planning to go there? Alone?"

"That's right," she answered again. "Why are you asking me this? What's wrong with Happytown?"

Manchas sighed, leaning back in his seat. "When you get to be in this position, there are certain responsibilities you have to undertake. Every district, every citizen, all under your guidance. It's quite a lot to take in, as you can imagine."

"I can," Judy agreed, not sure where he was going with this.

"Some of those responsibilities are much harder than others," he continued, looking at her sternly. "And chief among them is Happytown."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't blame you for not knowing. It's a neighborhood that much of the city tries to forget. I'm not going to mince words with you, Judy. It's a slum. A  _predator_ slum. And many of them have a very different idea of what justice entails."

"Oh…"

Judy tried to avert her gaze, but Manchas slammed both paws on the desk to ensure he kept her attention. "I am telling you this for your own good. A lone cop can't do much in a lawless land, even one as talented as yourself. There is no guarantee that you will come back unharmed and I don't need that on my conscience. So if I'm going to send you there, I need you to be absolutely certain about this."

Judy hesitated, but only for a second. She met the mayor's hard look with one of her own. "Sir, Nick could be in far worse danger even now. If I chose to ignore my own partner in need, even at the risk of my own life, then I wouldn't deserve to call myself a cop. I may not know when to quit, but frankly, I don't want to."

Manchas held his stare for a moment longer, before finally breaking into a toothy grin. "Good answer." He promptly turned to the intercom and pressed the button. "Sunny, I need you to look up an address."

Within seconds, the assistant mayor had returned. "Yes sir, for whom, sir?" he asked, holding a stack of files in one paw, a salute with the other, and holding the door open with his foot.

"Look for the surname 'Wilde' in the district of Happytown."

"Sure! Just let me finish reorganizing these files." Judy watched the other bunny zip back and forth across the office in a blur, diminishing his workload at insane speeds. Is this what  _she_ looked like on parking duty?

"Found it!" Judy hadn't even realized he'd started looking. "Ms. Marian Wilde, currently residing in Sherwood Apartments, Room 73, on Pine Road. That good?"

Judy quickly took out her carrot pen and copied the address onto her notepad. "Yes, that's great! Thank you!"

"Just doing my civic duty, ma'am," he replied, saluting her. Didn't he ever get tired of that?

She turned back to the mayor. "I'm sorry to cut this short, sir, but I need to get moving."

"I understand," Manchas assured her. "Good luck finding Nick. If you're the one on his tail, then I have no doubt you'll save him. Just as you did with Otterton...and with me."

"Thank you," Judy said again, giving Manchas and Sunny one last smile before she left the room.

After a moment, Sunny's smile faded, suddenly putting two and two together. "Wait, she's going to  _Happytown?!_ "

Judy closed the door behind her, feeling an extra hop in her step.  _Looks like I'm finally getting somewhere!_

She didn't make it more than five steps outside before her phone rang. Her blood froze when she noticed it was a call from the ZPD.

Gritting her teeth, she fought down the anxiety and forced herself to answer.

"Judy! Are you okay?!"

It was only Clawhauser. "Yes, I'm fine, thank you," she answered, sighing in relief.

But the cheetah oddly seemed even more relieved. "Oh, thank goodness! I have no idea what I would have done if something happened to you! You're the only one who doesn't make fun of me, you know. Some of the others try to hide it, but-"

"I'm sorry, but can you call me later? I appreciate your support, but I'll deal with the chief when I get back."

"Oh, I'm not talking about the chief. That is sooooooooo old news to me now."

"Then what  _is_  this about?" Judy asked, suddenly growing worried.

He paused for a moment. "You went to check out Nick's house earlier, right?"

"Yes. It was a little over an hour ago now. Why do you ask?"

"You...didn't see anything weird while you were there, did you? Like any suspicious figures or something?"

That was oddly specific. "No? Clawhauser, what's going on?" she asked again, her foot hammering in agitation. So much for losing her stress.

And it was only going to get worse.

"We just got a call from Precinct 4. Nick's house has been burned to the ground."

* * *

_Sahara Square_

_New Mexicow_

_12: 20 PM_

"You know, I kind of thought you meant  _my_ home, but then I realized it's way too warm for that," Jimmy observed, looking out of the bus's window at the sandy dunes and towering palms of Sahara Square.

"Do I look like your babysitter or something?" Carla snapped at him. "Find your own way back to Mommy and Daddy."

"I am not a baby!" Jimmy teared up, hugging Wallace tightly. "I'm not, I'm not, I'm not!"

"I won't even comment on that," she said, looking away in disgust. "Now mammal up, we need to be ready for our mission."

"And...what is that mission again?"

How she hated having to remind herself of this. "We're going here to...protect...Sanchez." She forced it out like it was bile in her throat.

"Wait,  _that's_ what we're doing?" Jimmy's eyes widened in panic. "N-No! You can't trust me to protect anyone! I'll just screw it up again! I can't let anyone else die because of me!" The fox made a lunge for the window, intending to literally jump out of the moving vehicle, but Carla tackled him into his seat before he got the chance.

"Oh no you don't!" she yelled. "I'm not letting you flake out on your duty! Hopps and Wilde clearly haven't gotten that through to your thick little skull, so I'm gonna have to pound it in with force!"

"Ow, you're hurting me!"

"Good! The pain helps you grow!"

Ignoring the odd glances they got from the other passengers, Carla pulled him back up into his seat, giving him a look that dared him to try that again. He didn't. "That's more like it. This isn't easy for me either, you know."

"Why not?"

 _Damn this curious canine._ "Let's just say that Sandcat Sanchez and I have a...history together. And that the last thing I want to do is protect him," she said bitterly, leaning against the window. "Look, no matter what you're going through right now, just trust me when I say it's a lot worse on my end. Sometimes, we just don't have a choice in these things."

Jimmy just nodded, thankfully not prying any further. Or maybe he just wasn't in the mood as his focus was quickly taken by their surroundings again. "Whoa...where are we  _now?"_

Carla afforded herself a small smile. "Welcome to New Mexicow, my hometown."

Jimmy continued to be awed as they stepped outside into rows of colorful buildings and festive decorations. The sounds of loud, frantic music reached his ears, making him bob his head. Even his emotional funk started to melt away to this funky beat. "Wow, this place is like a never-ending party!"

 _"Viva la Fiesta!"_ Wallace cheered.

"You'll get used to it," Carla replied cynically. "Come on, let's get moving." She headed off down the sidewalk, barely paying attention to their bright surroundings, whereas Jimmy tried to take in every single detail.

"To Sanchez?"

"Hell no! I'm not going anywhere near that  _maldito gato_ until I absolutely have to!"

"Wait, then why are we here?" he asked, holding Wallace over his head and shaking him to the beat.

"Like I said, we're going home. I need a bit of downtime before I have to deal with San- _him,_ and who better to spend it with than my own mate?"

He nearly flung Wallace off. "You have a  _mate?"_

"Why does everyone find that so hard to believe?" she snarled in frustration. "Yes! I! Have! A! MATE!"

"Cool!" Jimmy smiled, shaking off his surprise quickly. "So what's he like?

Carla slowed down a bit, suddenly feeling uncomfortable. "Uh…"

"Is he actually funny? I know that's usually a hyena thing, just not with you."

"Uhhh…"

"And he must be pretty huge to keep up with you too. A guy my size would be flattened before long. Er...no offense."

"Uhhhhh…shut up."

She finally stopped in front of a noticeably less-decorated house, two stories tall and looming over them almost ominously.

"All right...let's go." Carla took a deep breath and walked up to the front porch, her finger hovering over the doorbell. "Urrgh...come on, Hyenandez...just press it…"

" _I'll do it!"_

The hyena gasped as Wallace's snout was shoved against the doorbell. The theme of 'La Cucaracha' rang loudly through the house. "What did you do that for?!"

"What? You forced me out of my comfort zone to help me feel better, so I'm doing the same," Jimmy answered, shooting her a thumbs-up.

Carla was seconds away from throttling him when the door opened. As if staring down the barrel of a gun, the hyena lost her composure instantly. "Uh...hey there. I'm...I'm home."

Jimmy looked into the doorway, excited to meet Carla's mate...but not seeing anyone. "Your mate is invisible? Awesome!"

"Look down," she said, not taking her eyes away.

The fox did, and only grew more dumbfounded. At their feet was a caramel brown rat with a pink nose, wearing black cutoff jeans and a purple T-shirt for 'Mammal Wrestling Entertainment'. Even more striking was that the rodent was confined to a wheelchair. Despite her somewhat intimidating appearance, she wore a big grin on her face. "Carla! You're home!"

Jimmy's jaw dropped and his head slowly fell to one side, as did Wallace's. The Wallabeanie spoke first. " _Didn't see_  that coming!"

Carla smiled warmly and dipped her head down to reach the rodent. "I've missed you so much, Priscilla."

"Where have you been?" the rat asked softly, wheeling herself closer to kiss her on the cheek.

Jimmy couldn't help but smile. Strange as this might be, it  _was_ kind of adorable.

"Where have you been?!" Priscilla yelled again, slapping that same cheek. The fox stepped back, surprised to see that the blow was actually strong enough to make Carla flinch, though that was hardly the most surprising thing about this encounter.

"I'm sorry…" Carla said, her tone morose. "You know I would have come to visit sooner if I could, but-"

"But  _nothing!_ I don't care how important your job is, you can't just leave me behind,  _hiena muda!"_

Carla bit her lip, not sure how to respond.

Jimmy did it for her. "Hey, it's not like that. Carla's been, like,  _super_ busy with this case we're on and…" He stopped when he saw them both glaring daggers at him.

Priscilla looked him up and down suspiciously. "Carla, who is this?"

"Oh, that's Jimmy Frost. My partner," she answered casually.

A bit  _too_ casually. " _Partner?!"_ The rodent's expression turned into pure, unbridled rage, making Jimmy shiver. "So... _this_ is the one who's been keeping you away from me."

Carla's eyes widened. "Wait, no! That's not what I mea-!"

"RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Priscilla charged, her wheels spinning furiously. Jimmy wondered if he should move when the rat slammed on the brakes, sending her flying out of the chair and directly at his face. The poor fox didn't even have time to scream before the small, furry bullet crashed into him.

"DIE, HOMEWRECKER!"

* * *

_Happytown_

_Suitopia Building_

_12: 46 PM_

" _So? How do you like it?"_

_Nick looked up at his father curiously, the kit not entirely sure what he was so excited about. "What is it?"_

_John Wilde frowned, grabbing the back of his son's head and turning it back towards the building in front of them. "Why, it's a store!_  Our _store!"_

_He looked the building up and down, seeing it's white walls, glossy windows, and the large sign reading "Wilde & Son's Suitopia" staring back down at him. "But what's a Suitopia"?_

" _Nicholas, it's just a pun," John laughed, rubbing his head playfully. "More importantly, this right here is going to be our key to a better future. We just need to take out a little loan on this place and then we'll be open for business."_

" _So all we have to do is get someone to help us?" Nick asked, smiling hopefully._

_John smiled back, but he was too young to tell how fake it was. "Yes, son. That's all we have to do."_

It was almost eerie how well the place had held up over the years. Even the old sign barely looked any less pristine than it had before. Or maybe that was just the nostalgia talking. Nick never thought he would come back here again, and certainly not under these circumstances, but if there was one place he knew to look for his father, it was here.

He kept a wary eye out as he approached the shop. Happytown was, unfortunately, exactly as he remembered it. High predator population, low predator satisfaction, buildings run-down and marred by squatters and bullet holes. And so he kept his eyes peeled for anyone trying to take advantage of a seemingly new face, or even worse, the other half of his family. The only thing more stressful than finding Dad here would be finding Mom.

_What would she even think of me right now? Just when I thought I was making her proud again…_

_If you care so much what she thinks of you, why did you run away in the first place?_

Nick winced. Further proof that his own thoughts hurt much more than anyone else's. Looking over his shoulder one last time, he walked up the steps to the shop and hesitantly knocked on the door.

No answer. Was he really expecting one?

After a few seconds, he finally steeled himself and pushed open the door. "Dad?"

There was nobody inside. Just a few empty chairs and a desk cluttered with junk. Had he been wrong? Was there really nothing for him here?

No. He sniffed the air a few times. His father's scent definitely lingered here, along with that of Koslov and a few other familiar "friends". They had been here all right, and recently. Nick cursed himself for his reluctance. He had just missed them!

He wandered over to the desk, flicking the head of a tacky bobblehead.  _That_ certainly hadn't been here before.

" _I can't believe this!"_

_Nick's head shot up from the small rubix cube he had been fiddling with. He wasn't sure why, but toys like this interested him so much more than the action figures and miniature trucks all the other kits seemed to enjoy. Not that they ever let him play with them anyway. "W-What's wrong?"_

_The older fox whirled around on him. "What's wrong? Weren't you paying attention? They rejected us, all of them!" John slammed a heavy fist onto the desk, making Nick flinch away. It had been a hard day to be sure, as the two of them had given their spiel again and again, asking for a loan, only to be summarily rejected each place they went._

_Even so, Nick had never seen his father so angry before. "But...that's okay, right? We'll just try again tomorrow."_

_His words had a strange effect. John calmed almost instantly, contemplating something. Whatever conclusion he had come to seemed to make him happier, as a small smile spread across his muzzle. "Indeed...you are so much like your mother." He turned away, heading for the door. "No need to wait until tomorrow. There is still another way."_

" _Huh? But aren't all the banks closed by now?" Nick asked, running up to follow him._

_In response, John simply raised a paw to stop him. "You can't come along on this one, Nicholas. Don't worry, I'll be back soon."_

_Nick didn't get the chance to ask anything else before his dad left him alone._

His paw drew away from the bobblehead, which grinned back at him mockingly.

This was getting harder and harder the longer he stayed here. He needed to find whatever his father had left for him and get out of here. And he had very little doubt now that there  _was_ something to find. But if it wasn't up here…

Nick's eyes drifted over to the door at the back of the room, leading down into the basement. The place where John had done all of his tailoring.

He was surprised to find the door locked, especially when the front hadn't been. More surprising was that it was secured with an advanced padlock several decades younger than the door itself. This was a recent addition, and it didn't take much thought to guess why.

_I have to test your skills somehow, Nicholas. Come on, show me you haven't lost your touch._

As much as he didn't want to, Nick reached into his tie, pulled out a set of trusty lockpicks, and set to work. This took a good deal of time to crack, as the fox twisted the pins back and forth, one ear pressed against the mechanism. Finally, it came undone, falling to the floor. Once upon a time, he might have felt proud of such an achievement, but now it just seemed empty.

Nick brushed that aside and headed down, the stairs creaking loudly under his feet. The smell of old machinery greeted him at the bottom and he entered to the sight of a single, large sewing machine.

" _It's all about control, Nicholas. Ensuring that every thread you weave is integral to the finished product."_

_Nick watched his father intently, following each step as he put the suit together. Business was booming for Suitopia, and while he had gotten several of these demonstrations already, he never grew tired of it. Though it did make him wonder sometimes…_

" _Is that how you got the money for this place?"_

_John paused, but only for a second. Not enough to disrupt his work of course. "You keep finding new ways to ask the same question. You've taken after me well," he said proudly._

" _And you keep finding new ways to dodge the question," Nick said back, giggling as he rocked on his heels._

 _His dad laughed, smiling at him as he put the finishing touches on the suit. "Sorry, I respect your efforts, but I still can't tell you. What I_ will _say is that our kind...sometimes, there are just less options available to us, and that which remains becomes much more appealing. You don't understand that just yet, but you will."_

_Nick just nodded. Indeed, he didn't understand that at all. Mom always told him this was the city where anyone could be anything, so why…_

" _Just remember this." John halted his childlike curiosity by pulling him into a hug. "No matter what happens, everything I do, I do for you."_

_Nick looked over his shoulder, at the completed suit sitting behind him._

Nick looked down at the completed suit sitting in front of him. This too had only been made recently, even though the machine itself seemed to be on its last legs. Why had  _this_ of all things been left for him to find? Visibly, it didn't seem to be any different from the suits he had seen on all of his dad's thugs. And yet, there was something very unsettling about it. It took him a moment to figure out what, just by looking.

This suit was a perfect fit for him.

_If you're trying to psych me out, Dad-_

_It's working?_

Nick found himself clutching his tie and forced his paw away. Knowing he had to see this through to the end, he searched the suit. What he found was exactly what he was hoping for.

A spare room key for a suite in the Grand Palms Hotel. That was where he would find him.

_See you soon, Nicholas. I'll be waiting._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A number of minor revelations in this one. Guess we'll start with the most bizarre: Priscilla Rodentriguez, who belongs to Mind Jack. We've been looking forward to getting into Carla's backstory for some time now and this is one of the main reasons why. This was already hinted at when she talked with Delgato (and we grinned in amusement as no one picked up on the gender-neutral pronouns), but I think it's safe to say that no matter what you were expecting Carla's mate to be like, it probably wasn't this.
> 
> A bit less shocking was the reveal of Mayor Manchas, if only because he was intended to come in way sooner, as in, before Reynard was a thing. You can tell because the last time the mayor was mentioned was in Chapter 9, but we could never find a place to really introduce him. So I'll fully admit that he was pretty much shoehorned into this chapter just to get that out of the way. Why is Manchas the mayor anyway? Because we dislike the idea of Lionheart staying in power and thought another big cat with better reasons to help the city would be neat. That's about it.
> 
> Even so, it did allow us the opportunity to make a new assistant mayor as well, with the help of fellow user Lucky the Meowth. Yes, I know his nickname is perfect for a rabbit, but that's just a happy coincidence. There was another cameo of sorts in this chapter, but good luck noticing it unless you're already aware of the OC we're referencing. :P
> 
> Now, let's get to the results of our last question: What songs would be most appropriate for Born to Be Wilde. Boy, did we get some responses. :D
> 
> Anonymous: "This Is Gonna Hurt" by Sixx A.M.
> 
> Baneblade: "Bad Moon Rising", "(Wish I Could) Hideaway", "Fortunate Son", "I Heard It Through The Grapevine", and "Someday Never Comes" by Creedence Clearwater Revival. You were right about them having a lot of good songs for this, that's for sure.
> 
> FloofyFox: "Demons" by Imagine Dragons.
> 
> JustAnotherGuest: "The Man Who Sold The World" by David Bowie.
> 
> Katsuke: "Fallen" by Sarah McLachlan.
> 
> AncuL: "Symphony of the Night" by DragonForce.
> 
> KohGeek: "Don't You Worry Child" by Swedish House Mafia, "Still Alive" by Lis Miskovsky, "Silhouettes" by Of Monsters and Men, "Vengeance", "The Way", and "See What I've Become" by Zack Hemsey. Someone really went overboard here. XD
> 
> Let us know if we missed anyone. There were quite a lot.


	19. Mi Casa es Su Quesa

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A new chapter for the new year! Time to at least semi-resolve all of those cliffhangers you were left with last time. You're welcome. :P
> 
> Special thanks to rkaoril for her advice on how to Spanish. It certainly came at a good time. We've even gone back through all the previous chapters to make corrections and will be more mindful of mistakes in the future.

****

**Chapter 19: Mi Casa es Su Quesa**

_Sahara Square_

_New Mexicow_

_12: 42 PM_

Despite everything, Jimmy Frost had to admit that he was building up a pretty impressive resume for a rookie police officer. Kidnapped on his first day, defeating a hick wolf in a biker duel, getting his heart torn to shreds, which was probably normal at  _some_ point, right? And to top it all off, now he was on the ground getting repeatedly punched in the face by a wheel-chair bound rat who also happened to be his partner's mate.

So yeah. That was a thing.

"Ow! Ow! OWWW! Carla, help!"

"Oh, I bet you'd  _like_ that, wouldn't you, puto?!" Priscilla growled, landing an uppercut to his snout.

Grabbing Jimmy's jaw, she spun herself around his muzzle and flung her tiny frame onto one of his raised knees, then down onto his left foot, stubbing  _all_  of his toes. She grabbed him by the ankle and further showed her incredible upper body strength by hoisting the fox over her head and slamming him down on the other side.

"Come on, Jimmy, fight back!" Carla shouted. "Show some backbone!" She didn't make any move to help him. He had to learn  _somehow._

"W-Wait, can we just talk about, AHHH, it doesn't bend that way! It doesn't bend that way!"

"It does now! Beso mi culo!" the rat cried, pulling his leg up and over his backside. Jimmy let out a loud, whining yelp as Priscilla grabbed his tail and painfully twisted it. She used his tail to throw him onto his backside again, and then...

"Mom said people aren't supposed to touch me there!"

"And now you'll know what being a mom is  _like!"_

Carla's eyes widened.  _This_ move she had to stop. Before Priscilla could do unspeakable things to Jimmy's privates, she quickly stepped in to grab the rodent out of the air. "Wait, wait! Priscilla, I can explain!"

The rat settled for spitting on him as she glared up at her mate. "You've got some explaining to do alright! Like explaining why I haven't seen hide nor hair of you since graduation!"

The hyena looked away guiltily. "It's...complicated."

Jimmy wearily raised a paw. "I'm okay! Just...so you know…"

Priscilla glanced back at the downed fox. "Okay, I'll bite. How do you know this guy, Carla?"

"I told you, he's my partner." The rodent's teeth gnashed. "My  _police_ partner."

"Oh." She looked back and forth between them again, just now picking up on the matching ZPD uniforms. "Oooooooooh." She squirmed out of Carla's grip and dropped onto one of Jimmy's raised knees as he sat back up. "Lo siento. I tend to get a bit...agitated...when it comes to my mate."

He shrugged. "Carla gets agitated about everything, so no biggie." The hyena growled at him. "See?"

Priscilla frowned, looking at Carla with clear concern. "Carla...are you alright? This isn't like you."

"I'm fine," she said, not making eye contact. "Let's just say my training regimen has been a bit harder than expected."

"Mierda! You  _like_ a challenge!"

"Not this kind. Not when I have to work with Wilde."

"Who?"

"Nick Wilde! He's the greatest!" Jimmy grinned and nodded his head quickly, as if that was all the answer she needed.

"Carla?"

The three mammals turned back to the house, and Jimmy once again needed to be reminded to look down. Standing there was another rat, this one in a periwinkle house dress and a white apron. Her fur was slightly graying, but still an attractive shade of brown. "Carla, is that you?" the old rat asked, squinting her beady eyes at her. "It's so good to have you home, dear."

Carla smiled politely. "It's good to  _be_ home, mi madre."

Smiling, she slowly turned her head back inside the house. "EVERYONE, CARLA'S HOME! GET YOUR TAILS OUT HERE!"

Jimmy's ears twitched. He looked around warily as the ground started to tremble around him. There was a low rumbling sound, which started to get louder and louder. "Earthquake!"

"No." Carla smiled. "Just family."

The rumbling reached its peak as a horde of rats flooded out of the house. The swarm seemed to have no end, and they were all homing in straight on the three of them.

Jimmy screamed.

* * *

_Grand Palms Hotel_

_7th Floor - Oasis Casino_

_1: 13 PM_

_Sahara's Square premier resort was quite hard to miss. The local transit passed right by it and even the most stalwart tourists had to wonder just what that giant metal palm tree was all about. They were almost invariably disappointed to learn it was just a hotel, but it was a hotel with more than its fair share to offer, especially for the less savory crowd._

" _Watch and learn, Nicholas. This is how you win." John smiled and tilted his hand of cards to the left, just enough for his son to see. The young fox made a slight frown. He had seen his father play this game enough to know that his hand wasn't very good. So then why did he seem so confident about it? It was almost scary how calm he was._

_His opponent, a skinny deer, seemed to be having similar doubts. John said nothing, just staring across the card table, patiently awaiting his next move. The deer started shivering, his cards trembling in his hoof. John kept staring._

_Letting out a choked gasp, the deer's eyes went wide and he froze up, his hand dropping onto the table._

" _I think that's his way of saying he folds," John chuckled, raking a pile of chips over to him. Nick looked over at the deer's dropped hand, even more confused. Despite all the bravado, his father indeed had the worse hand._

" _It's not about the cards, son, it's about how you play them," John said, answering his question before he could ask it. Nick looked up in wonder, amazed in that youthful way that was so precious John couldn't help but smile. He reached over and patted him on the head affectionately. "And no fox worth his salt plays cards without a hidden ace. Or at least two Jokers. Just like the two of us, eh son?"_

"Who are ya calling son?"

Reynard blinked, his vision clearing as the cheerful young tod in front of him was suddenly replaced by a grumpy fennec fox in a suit. While he would never say so aloud, Finnick actually looked kind of adorable like this.

He awkwardly took the paw off of his head, frowning. "Sorry...just got hit by a bout of nostalgia. How interesting."

"Not as 'interesting' as getting fondled by your new boss," Finnick replied, crossing his arms. "I gotta say, Nick can be pretty weird at times, but now I see where he gets it from. Now I'm not gonna look a gift fox in the mouth after what you've done for me, but you sure you're all right?"

Reynard reached up to rub his eye, yawning. "Oh, I'm fine. Just nerves."

"Nerves? You?" Finnick let out a snort. "I didn't think you had a nervous bone in your body."

"Family has a way of changing things," he said simply, returning his attention to the poker table and the mammal playing against him. "Your move, jackass." As easy as flipping a switch, Count Reynard was back in the game.

The donkey glared at him.

"Hey, don't look at me like that just because you have a lousy hand."

"I do not have a lousy hand."

"Yes you do."

"No I don't!"

"Yes you do."

"No I don't!"

"No you don't."

"Yes I do!"

"No you don't."

"...Yes I do," he sighed. He made a move to fold.

Reynard smiled.

The donkey's lip curled and he glared back at him. "Hey, nice try! You almost had me, but I'm not falling for that!"

He shrugged. "Suit yourself." He casually put down a four-of-a-kind, all aces. "Then I take it you've got something to beat this?"

The donkey's jaw went slack and his head slumped onto the table. "No I don't…"

"Didn't think so." Reynard used his cane to pull another stack of chips over to his end, smiling down at Finnick. "Come on, let's go hit the slots next. I'm feeling lucky."

"What exactly is my job here again?"

"Your  _job_ is to hang back and watch while I bring in some new funding. I'm pushing seventy, Two of Clubs, I need a little more spice in my life."

"Yeah, about that name. You're not just making a crack about my height, are you?"

Reynard didn't get to answer. "What is this? I spy with my little eye, some new faces in these places!"

The two suited mammals made quite the contrast to the flashy feline now standing in front of them. "So you're Sandcat," Finnick said boldly. Maybe it was the wardrobe or Reynard's presence next to him, but somehow the Sahara Square crime lord wasn't all that scary in person.

"Si!" he made a small bow, tilting his hat. "What brings you fine amigos to my establishment?"

"Nothing much. Just personal business," Reynard replied, smiling at him in a very "I'm not planning to murder you at all" sort of way. "We're taking a tour of the local venues."

"But of course! We have much to offer after all."

Reynard whispered to the smaller fox, "Watch this," then smirked back at Sanchez. "Like what? I've read the brochures, but I'd love to hear it from you personally."

"No hay problema," Sanchez grinned, immediately whipping out his violin. "If that is what you desire, then I must sing for you a song of introduction."

Finnick paled. He'd been warned about this…

" _Sahara Squaaaaaaaaare, I was born and raaaaaaaaaaised!"_

" _Just look aroooooooound, you'll be amaaaaaaaaazed!"_

" _At this hoteeeeeeeeel, we'll serve you weeeeeeeeell!"_

" _So ring the beeeeeeeeeell, stay for a speeeeeeeeell!"_

Finnick groaned, his large ears ringing. Not only was that "song" near-deafening, it didn't tell them  _anything!_

Chuckling at his discomfort, Reynard clapped lightly.

"Gracias, gracias! I am happy to be of service. Enjoy your stay, amigos!" With a polite wave, Sanchez strolled past them and disappeared into the crowd.

"Nice guy," Finnick said, digging a claw in his ear to make sure it still worked right. "A little  _too_ nice if you ask me..."

"Did he smell funny to you?"

Finnick looked up at the older fox, wondering if his hearing really  _was_ damaged. "Uh...no?"

Reynard just nodded. "Hmm. I gotta say, Sanchez must be pretty cocky to just walk up to me like that. You think he's onto us?"

"I bet you already know."

"Well yeah." He put his arms behind his head and leaned back in his chair. "It's really hard to find a good challenge these days."

"Except for Nick, right?"

"...What?"

" _That's_  why you brought me in, isn't it?" Finnick pressed. "Cause' the only challenge you have left is from the guy you raised to follow in your footsteps. And that's why you're so bent out of shape. Even  _you_ don't know how this is all gonna turn out, do ya?"

"Impressive deduction. And here I thought I only liked you for taking such good care of my boy. You're quite perceptive."

Perceptive enough to know a dodged question when he saw one. "You have any idea when he's gonna show up?"

"Soon. Very soon I suspect. And when he does, I'll be ready for him." Reynard leapt from his seat and nudged Finnick's backside with his cane. "Now come on, Daddy needs a new secret lair!"

Finnick followed him towards the slot machines, already expecting Reynard to somehow rob them blind.  _I sure hope you know what you're getting yourself into, Nick._

* * *

_New Mexicow_

_Rodentriguez Residence_

_1: 17 PM_

Soon after Jimmy regained consciousness, he was quick to adapt to the situation. A little  _too_ quick, really. By the time the family sat down for lunch, he had already gotten used to the low ceilings and not stepping on any of his hosts.

"Thanks for the meal, Mrs. Rodentriguez!" the fox smiled, sipping on his very small soup bowl. "Er, I mean gracias!"

"Don't pervert our language," said Carla. Being the two largest mammals in the room by far, they didn't exactly fit in with the legions of rats that sat with them at the long table, eating a variety of breads, soups, and of course, cheeses. Even so, Carla didn't seem the least bit bothered by it. Priscilla sat next to her, with Wallace having his own spot next to Jimmy, currently being swarmed by curious rat children.

" _Please don't eat me!"_

Elizabeth, the family matriarch, smiled at Jimmy and refilled his soup bowl. "Aren't you just the sweetest thing? It's only natural to invite such a polite young fox into our home, especially one that's a friend of Carla's. How long have you been working together?"

"Not too long. We've only just gotten onto the force and most of our time has been apart."

"Yet every moment has been memorable," Carla added, tossing a piece of cheese into her mouth.

"On the bright side, the academy made your cula nice and muscly," Priscilla giggled, enjoying the view from her current seat.

"What's a cula?" Jimmy asked, making Carla smack him. "...Okay, I guess it doesn't matter. Oh, I have another question! Why are you living with a bunch of rats, Carla?"

Priscilla glared. "Care to repeat that?"

"Don't mind him, he's just dumb," Carla said, wondering when the fox would start eating the food instead of his foot. "He's probably asking how we met and all."

She relaxed, but only slightly. "Well, if he  _must_  know, we took in Carla off the streets."

"My parents were gunned down in a drive-by shooting," the hyena said, casually chewing on a wooden spoon. "I ran away before Social Services could pick me up, but soon found myself living as a vagabond, finding grub wherever I could, stealing to survive, that kind of thing." She completely ignored Jimmy's horrified expression. "While digging through the trash in an alley one night, I came across a group of rats, including Priscilla here. They took pity on me, offered me food, and then let me stay with them."

"What else could we do for the poor thing but take her in?" Elizabeth asked sympathetically. Carla just grunted at the gesture. "She grew up as much of a Rodentriguez as the rest of us, but she and Priscilla really hit it off and now it's official. She's my darling daughter-in-law."

Jimmy was surprised he even  _could_ be surprised anymore. "Whoa...so you two are actually...?"

"What, you were still having doubts?" Priscilla snapped. "Then take a look at this!" She raised her tiny paw towards him.

He squinted. "Uh...I don't see anything."

Priscilla leapt from her wheelchair, grabbed his tie, and yanked him down to eye level. Her arm was stopped about a millimeter from his eye, but it was close enough to see the gold ring on her finger.

"Perra tonta!" Elizabeth scolded, twacking Priscilla on the dome with her ladle. "You will not strike a guest in this house! Lo siento, Señor Frost. My daughter has had...anger issues since her injury."

He just nodded, smoothing out his tie again. "Yeah, I bet. How did that happen anyway? Was there an accident while you were, uh…" He looked at Carla.

"Dios mio, I am going to kill you myself!"

Elizabeth jumped up and hit her too. "Nooooooo…"

"It was Sandcat Sanchez," Priscilla blurted out.

The room went silent, even the youngest and most rambunctious of rodents at rapt attention. Carla tensed up, leaning down to put a gentle paw on her mate's backside. "Mi Corazon, you don't have to tell the story if you don't want to."

"He's just going to find out eventually," she sighed, turning back to the fox. "Señor Frost, how familiar are you with Lucha Libre?"

"Er...it's like wrestling, but with more colorful costumes and lots of yelling."

"...I suppose you could say that," she said, struggling to restrain herself. "Well, it might surprise you to know that both Carla and I used to be famous luchadoras."

He grinned, overwhelmed with excitement just trying to picture that. "Wow! That must have been awesome!"

She couldn't help a smile. "Yes. It was." Her ears fell and her smile quickly shifted to a frown. "For a while, anyway. Then Sandcat took over."

"That bastardo ruined everything!" Carla snarled, slamming her bowl down. "He completely killed the honor, the  _passion_  of the art! It stopped being about the glory of stepping into the ring and started being about stuffing his pockets!" She glared down at the floor bitterly. "Every one of us was under orders to win or lose matches on his call. His favorite victor being his pet cabron, El Orgullo."

"Now that's just mean," Jimmy pouted. "So what happened?"

"I refused," Priscilla said quietly. "I refused to throw a match against El Orgullo. In revenge, Sanchez had me crippled."

Carla shook her head. "We had everything we could ever want...and  _he_  took it all away! I couldn't fight in the ring any longer without my partner. We were both forced to quit Lucha Libre forever."

"If you knew all of this, why not report it to the ZPD?" asked Jimmy.

She snorted. "Sanchez is one of the biggest crime lords in the city. You really think the word of two deadbeat luchadoras is enough to stop him? No, the only way he was going to be brought to justice was if I did it myself!"

His eyes widened as he backed away from the table. "Y-You mean... _that's_  the reason you joined the ZPD?!"

"That's right. I figured if I was on the force long enough, sooner or later I would get a shot at Sanchez." She growled furiously, clenching her fists. "But now...now…!" She was like a ticking time bomb waiting to go off.

And Jimmy yanked all the wires. "So then... why are you protecting him?"

It wasn't Carla who exploded though. "You're WHAT?!" Priscilla screamed. "When were you planning on telling me this?!"

Carla winced. "It's...it's complicated…"

"I don't care how 'complicated' it is, you will explain this right now or so help me-!"

Elizabeth cracked her on the head. "Cabrona, one more outburst and I will put you over my knee!"

"Not like I even have  _feeling_ down there anymore..." she muttered.

Carla raised her paw. "No...I'll explain." Every beady little eye in the room turned to her. Even Jimmy, who already knew everything she was going say, was still fixated on how softly Carla spoke to her adopted family. She was a totally different mammal from the one who had literally dragged him here.

After she finished her story, Priscilla was the first who could find words again. " ...I see. I can't believe it...even when we're not under his thumb anymore, you still can't do anything against him."

"Yeah, that about sums it up." She sighed again.

Priscilla reached over and stroked her ankle in sympathy. "I can't stand to see you this way, mi corazon." She suddenly got a mischievous smirk. "I think we're going to have to do something about that."

Her eyes widened. "W-Wait! Not that!"

Elizabeth smiled, getting Priscilla's signal loud and clear. She pointed a commanding ladle towards the hyena. "Rodentriguez family...ATAQUE!"

"No, no, no, no, NO!" Carla screamed as the rats suddenly dropped what they were eating and rushed her en masse. She didn't stand a chance as they swarmed her completely, dragging her much larger form to the ground.

Now free of rats, Wallace slumped over. " _Better her than me."_

Jimmy was horrified.  _Oh god, is this what they do to mopey mammals?! I'll never be mopey again, I swear!_

And then he heard a sound. A sound so bizarre and unexpected that he would've thought for sure he was losing it if the evidence weren't right in front of him.

"Hee hee hee...ah ha ha ha HA HA HA! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Carla squirmed around on the ground, laughing hysterically as the rats burrowed into her uniform, mercilessly tickling her all over. It was loud, boisterous, and even a little creepy, or maybe that was just because it sounded so strange coming out of her.

He gaped. "She  _can_ laugh!"

Priscilla didn't join in the fun, just nodding sadly. "Would you believe there was a time when she  _always_  laughed?"

"Really?"

She started wheeling herself away from the table, towards the kitchen door. "Señor Frost, I think I need to speak with you. Alone."

His self-preservation instincts screamed at him to stay the hell away from the sadistic rat in the wheelchair, but when did he ever listen to those anyway? He grabbed Wallace and followed Priscilla into the kitchen, where she immediately shut the door. Carla's continuous laughter served as a very inappropriate backdrop to what she had to say. "How well do you know Carla? Really?"

"Not that well," Jimmy admitted. "I always just knew her as that loud lady who gets mad a lot." He saw the look on her face. "N-No offense!" he hastily added.

"It's worse than I thought…" She shut her eyes. "She wasn't always like this. Carla always used to be so  _happy_ , so full of life. Not this angry, bitter shell that I see now."

"You think it's because of Sanchez?"

She shook her head. "No. That's what bothers me. Even after I was injured, it was never this bad. She was angry, yes, but it was channeled towards wanting to avenge me, towards becoming a ZPD officer and stopping Sanchez. She never lost her spirit like she has now, never lost her ability to  _laugh_. Now it's like she's completely given up hope."

"Yeah. It must be pretty rough having to work for the guy you swore to defeat."

"You don't get it!" she yelled. He flinched away, bracing himself for another rodent beatdown, but it never came. "This isn't about that! Ever since she graduated, she's been distant with me, with all of us! All I got were a few half-assed phone calls here and there, and I couldn't even go visit her because she moved somewhere else and wouldn't give me the address! And now, after all that, she just comes back home again like it's no big deal! Even now, she refuses to explain why she vanished like that in the first place, and who's to say she won't just do it again when this is all over!  _Estupida_   _insufrible hiena!"_

Jimmy slowly opened his eyes, lowering his arms. Priscila had finally finished her tirade, panting heavily and wiping some sweat from her brow. Or were those tears? She was so small it was hard to tell. "Something else is causing this, something that she won't even tell  _me_ , her own companera. And I...I don't know what I'm supposed to do about that."

He wasn't sure what he was supposed to do either. Of course he wanted to comfort her somehow, but he didn't know the first thing about relationships  _or_ how to properly handle small mammals. The best thing he could think of was to put Wallace on the floor and wrap his arms around her in an awkward facsimile of a hug. " _There, there. It'll be okay."_

He looked back towards the dining area, where Carla's laughter had stopped. Back to normal.

No, this wasn't normal. Carla had been  _ab_ normal for far longer than he realized, and he was going to figure out why. That's what partners were for.

* * *

_Happytown_

_Suitopia_

_1: 51 PM_

He couldn't put it off any longer.

Simon squinted at the device held in his paw. The Count had indeed given him another phone to replace the one he had tossed overboard, this model even more convoluted and hard to figure out than the last, which he suspected was intentional. Reynard had then given him a "mission" that required him to do nothing except stand around this dreary neighborhood for hours on end, which he also suspected was intentional. The bastard.

The aged raccoon had scoured the place up and down, picking up scents, footprints, even a few stray hairs, all to put off making this call for as long as possible. But with a slight growl, Simon finally dialed the number.

" _There you are, Ace! I was worried you somehow managed to drop this one down the toilet or something."_

He fought down the urge to do just that. "I can confirm that your son has been here, Count Reynard."

" _Hmm? I'm sorry, I don't recognize that name. Maybe you have a wrong number?"_

"Your son has been here,  _Wilde Card,"_ he hissed.

" _Ah, that's better. You're sure he taken the bait?"_

"Yes, I checked the suit and everything. He knows where to find you."

" _How long ago was he there?"_

"I'd say a little over an hour."

" _...Alright, good work. Carry on with your secondary objective then."_

"You seem apprehensive." Simon couldn't fight down a smirk. It was so rare he got this opportunity. "Worried that maybe your son isn't coming?"

" _He'll come! I'm certain of it!"_

"Are you?"

" _Secondary objective. Carry on. Don't push your luck, Ace."_ He hung up.

Simon chuckled as he slipped the phone back into his pocket. Now  _that_ felt good. It almost made up for all the grief the Count had put him through so far.

Almost.

Actually, no, not even close. But it was still satisfying.

The sound of another vehicle caught his attention. It was probably nothing, but given the circumstances, he had to keep watch for anything. Creeping up to the window, Simon peered out, seeing a taxi pull up to the curb on the other side of the street. Odd, so few mammals willingly traveled to this hellhole. Then he saw which mammal it was and his brow shot up in surprise.

Officer Judy Hopps.

He immediately pressed his back against the wall. To think the rabbit cop would follow Nicholas all the way here. The Count had been certain she'd never be able to keep up with his son. Perhaps he really  _was_  slipping.

Or maybe it wasn't Nicholas she was looking for. Could she really be after…hmm, that could prove troublesome. Simon pulled out the phone and went to press redial. Then again...was only a  _potential_ problem really worth putting up with Reynard again?

He put the phone away and pretended he didn't see anything. What the Count didn't know wouldn't hurt him.

Or maybe he would. Simon just wasn't sure how much he cared.

* * *

_1: 54 PM_

The call from Clawhauser had almost been enough to send Judy sprinting out of City Hall and straight back to the Rainforest District, but she refrained, knowing she had to stay on this trail while it was still hot.

As soon as she arrived in Happytown though, she almost reconsidered. To call this place unnerving would be an understatement. When Judy stepped out of the car into the forgotten district of Happytown, she was expecting a bad neighborhood, crime and grime around every corner. She was prepared to deal with that. What she wasn't prepared for was...nothing.

"Uh...stay here for about twenty minutes," Judy called to the cab driver as she stepped out. Either he didn't hear her or didn't listen as the vehicle sped off the instant she left it. "Great."

The place might as well have been a ghost town. As soon as the cab left, she could barely hear a sound outside of her own heavy breathing, nary a soul in sight. But she knew the place wasn't deserted. There were still mammals living here, she could  _feel_ them watching her. It was like the entire district had honed in on her the second she stepped foot here. A primal fear crept over her, the fear of predators in the shadows just waiting to pounce on their helpless prey. Her eyes were wide, her ears on high alert, and her nose started to twitch.

Then she smelled it. Nick's scent. It was faint, but definitely there, just like at the house. The house that had since been destroyed for reasons the ZPD didn't know and that she didn't even want to think about. Did that mean Nick had come here too? If this was where his mother was, then maybe…

_No, I can't get distracted chasing after Nick again. Remember why you're here, Judy._

She took a few deep breaths, fighting back the chilling atmosphere. She could still smell Nick, and that familiar presence reminded her of why she had to do this. Steeling herself, Judy finally got herself to move. The cab had dropped her off only a few blocks away from her destination, but it felt like miles when she had to keep herself from bolting the other direction with every step. How did  _anyone_ ever live here, let alone Nick and his family?

A flash of grey appeared in the corner of her eye and she turned to an alleyway, her tranq gun out and trained. Somehow, this action made her feel even  _less_ safe, like this community had gone from merely stalking her to being outright aggressive. A part of her wanted to pursue whoever had been following her, but what was the point? Best case scenario, it would be a waste of time, worst case scenario...she would rather not consider.  _I seriously need to get out of here._

Judy reluctantly lowered the gun as she quickly made her way up the steps of Sherwood Apartments. A quick hop up to the door handle and she was inside. She felt at least a  _little_ safer indoors, even if this apartment complex could really use some TLC. Say what you will about the Pangolin Arms, at least it looked decent.

"Marian Wilde, Room 73, Marian Wilde, Room 73, Marian Wilde, Room 73," she repeated to herself, the mantra leading her down the dim hallway as she quickly scanned each door. She knew it was probably safer to stay quiet, but any more silence would drive her insane.

"Marian Wilde...Room 73." She nodded resolutely as she finally found the room she was looking for. A vaguely Nick-like scent wafted out from inside, encouraging her despite her fear. She almost expected Mrs. Wilde to attack her on sight at this rate. "I'm doing this for you, you dumb fox."

She reached up and pressed the doorbell.

* * *

_Sahara Square_

_Grand Palms Hotel_

_2: 02 PM_

Squatting on a wooden bench, Nick sat under the fronds of a palm tree, staring at the much larger, shinier palm tree in front of him. He knew what he had to do, and at some point, he was going to have to go in there.

_Do I? Maybe I should just go back. Forget all this happened._

_You really think that's still an option? Now don't keep me waiting, son._

Sighing to himself, literally, Nick finally pushed himself off of the tree and approached the hotel. Having been to this place a number of times, mainly for less scrupulous pastimes, Nick knew that the crowds here were often overwhelmingly large. He had enough trouble just getting across the small bridge and makeshift moat that surrounded the building. Even so, his keen vulpine instinct noted that tonight's foot traffic seemed a lot more orderly than usual.

He shoved his way past a loitering buffalo and through the revolving doors. The interior of the hotel lobby was made up of sparkling pools and towering plant life, making it almost seem like he was still outdoors if he didn't know any better. There was a lounge, a newsstand, a bar and grill, and a single elevator that led to the upper floors.

There were also cops. A  _lot_ of cops.

Nick swore to himself and hid behind the nearest piece of foliage. What was the ZPD doing here?! His first, rather paranoid, thought was that they had somehow tracked him down and planned to bring him back by force. But another quick peek at the officers told him that this wasn't the same ZPD he had left behind, but rather the local Precinct 2. That much was evident by the bison, wild dogs, and even camels that made up this force. In which case, there was little question why they were here.

_Looks like Sanchez is already beefing up his stolen security._

_It's cute how he thinks that will stop me, but I somehow doubt they'll be happy to see_  you _either._

He knew they would have more than a few questions if they discovered a suspended officer lurking around a major point of interest in the investigation he had been kicked off of, not even getting into the reason  _why_ he was here. No, he had wasted enough time already and couldn't afford to be spotted.

It almost felt dirty having to sneak around the police again, but at least there were plenty of guests and hotel decor to serve as cover. Without so much as a cursory glance in his direction, Nick made it to the public elevator behind the reception desk and hopped inside amidst a group of wildebeest. His paw instinctively went to his pocket, feeling the outline of the keycard inside it. He had already memorized the floor number.

As the glass elevator started to ascend, Nick saw the other floors pass by him in a flash, its walls decorated in various shades of sand coloration to be as diverse as possible to its residents. The elevator stopped first on Floor 7, the Oasis Casino, where his fellow passengers all exited at once. No doubt Dad had spent a good amount of time here waiting for him.

_You can bet I made a real killing too! Not literally. Yet._

Nick gritted his teeth and let the elevator keep taking him up. If he stopped to check any other floor, he would lose his nerve. Finally, the doors opened up on Floor 12, one of the floors that actually had rooms instead of entertainment. Being located in the upper, thinner part of the palm tree-shaped building, it was clear what mattered more to them. He was thankfully the only one here as he strolled across the hallway and came to his room number, which was also 12.

_Subtle, Dad. Real subtle._

_Says the guy in the tacky Pawaiian shirt. I swear you're wearing that just to spite me._

This was it. No turning back. He raised the card to the reader and the door unlocked.

It was of no surprise whatsoever that John had gotten the most extravagant suite he could find. Nick stepped out onto lush moss carpeting into a room covered with luxuries. A complimentary fruit basket was on a table next to him, next to a covered, circular bed. A long couch sat in the middle of the suite, and behind it a set of bathtubs, three sizes for different species, along with an accompanying fur dryer. Behind yet another set of indoor palm trees was a grand piano that seemed to exist for no other reason than to be showy. As if all that weren't enough, there was even a balcony.

"Crazy like a fox" did not even begin to describe the mindset that went into staying in a place like this. Except...John Wilde was nowhere in sight.

_You son of a bitch._

_That describes both of us, Nicholas._

Really? After all the stress he had put him through getting here, the guy couldn't even bother to show up?! He sniffed the air. No doubt he had been here; the place was practically  _drenched_ in his scent. A few other scents were mixed in as well, including one he easily recognized as Finnick. Not that he hadn't suspected it, but the confirmation wasn't exactly reassuring.

There was another scent as well, one that stung his nose and made him wince. One that was also, unfortunately, very familiar. He followed the scent around a wall and realized that he wasn't the only one in here after all.

Sitting a few feet in front of the couch, previously hidden from view, was the skunk arsonist who had made his excursion in the Rainforest District so  _very_ memorable. He currently had his gas mask removed, his yellow and twitchy eyes fully visible. The guy looked weirdly happy for a crazed arsonist. The skunk had yet to notice his presence, completely transfixed by a fireplace in front of him. It wasn't even remotely cold. It was more like his father had done the equivalent of giving him a lollipop to keep him occupied.

Now how to handle this. He considered sneaking up on him, but that was way too risky when dealing with a skunk. He couldn't startle him, but he couldn't outright threaten him either. What a conundrum. He looked back and forth, searching for anything that could safely get his attention. He found his answer in a nearby switch on the wall. One click and the purely decorative fireplace extinguished instantly.

The skunk blinked a few times, as if unable to comprehend the sudden lack of fire. Nick stood there as patiently as he could until the mephit finally noticed him. "Hey! I was enjoying that!"

"Yeah, I could tell," he said dryly. "Look, I know we've had our...issues, but right now, I just want to get to the bottom of things. You know who I am, right?"

"Of course! Don't think that disguise can fool me!" The skunk grinned, completely forgetting his previous annoyance and actually saluting him. "I'm ready ready ready for my next mission, Wilde Card!"

Nick raised an eyebrow. Wilde Card? That was pretty lame, even by  _his_ standards. Exactly the kind of thing Dad would come up with though.

_Wait...don't tell me..._

"...First, give me a report on your last, er, mission," Nick ordered.

Sure enough, he answered immediately. "I guarded this room faithfully, sir! No one suspicious got in on my my my watch!" Given how absorbed he seemed to be in that fire, Nick doubted he would've noticed if an elephant had stampeded through.

But if he was going to play the Big Bad Fox, he might as well make the best of it. "Right! Good job, uh…"

"Jack Jack Jack! I didn't forget!" he smiled proudly.

If only  _all_  suspects were this cooperative. "I should hope not. Good job, Jack." He pinched his brow, wondering how exactly he was going to go about this. He suddenly wasn't sure if impersonating his dad made this easier or harder. "May I ask when you were expecting...me...to get back?"

Jack crossed his arms and frowned, trying to think. "Hmmmmm...later."

_Come on, son, put a little more 'oomph' into it. I can do better than that!_

" _When_ later?" he growled forcefully.

"I don't know!" he protested. "You don't tell me these things! You just kind of twirl twirl twirl your happy cane and leave without warning!"

_Yeah, that sounds like me._

Nick didn't have to fake his anger anymore. "So you don't know  _anything?"_

"Nope!" he announced, almost proudly.

"So what, I'm just supposed to sit around here now?!"

"I guess." He reached behind his back and pulled out an apple. "Want one?"

_Wow! Talk about a waste of time! Sucks to be you, son._

"Shut up!" This was the last straw. After all the abuse he had suffered so far: mauled, burned, skunked, suspended, having to turn on his own friends and potentially losing his job, following a trail of breadcrumbs all so he could settle the score with his father. And now all that effort was being halted just because some loony skunk couldn't give him a straight answer?!

Screw never letting them see that they got to him! This right here, this got to him!

With a fury he didn't even know he had, Nick lunged for the hapless skunk and tackled him to the ground. The mephit's hindquarters were wedged uncomfortably under his tail, so that even if he wanted to spray, it would do little good. And that was very inconvenient for him as Nick grabbed him violently by the throat. "Where is he?!"

"What what what are you t-t-talking about?" he asked fearfully, stuttering even more than usual. "I'm just trying to-"

"I said  _shut up!"_  Nick's fist slammed into his nose before he could finish. The skunk's face was left bloodied, and he could even see him tearing up a little, but that didn't stop him from putting his claws to his throat and bearing down on him. "I have had  _enough_ of his mind games! Do you have any idea what I've been through to get here?! I'm not playing around anymore, SO WHERE THE HELL IS HE?!"

"Oh my, it seems like we've answered the age old question: What's black and white and red all over?"

_Yeah yeah, any other cute jokes you wanna lob at me?_

It took him a second to realize that his father's voice hadn't come from inside his head this time. Nick froze, slowly turning around as two more mammals entered the room.

Finnick just watched in silent shock, clearly disturbed by what he had just walked in on.

But not his father. The older fox took one look at Nick and smiled, not a cruel smirk, but that same warm smile he remembered from all those years ago.

"Hello, Nicholas. We have much to catch up on."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, we're cliffhanging you again, but we're doing it to set up a neat parallel in the next chapter, so it's all good, right?
> 
> *ducks tomato*
> 
> That aside, this chapter serves to reveal most (but not all) of Carla's backstory and her history with Sandcat Sanchez. We also get more awkward bonding between her and Jimmy and hints that something bigger is a part of this. Hope you enjoyed that because they might not even be in the next chapter. You can probably tell we've got a BIG one coming next and it needs all the space it can get.
> 
> I've always wanted to see inside of the Palms Hotel (Palm Hotel? Another thing the sources can't seem to decide on.) so it's only natural that it's going to be a major location in this arc. It is designed almost purely from the artbook, even using the same suite as Reynard's room. The only minor tweak is that we changed the room's entrance to a door instead of a private elevator, because if there's only one elevator in the lobby, then how the hell does that work? Shoutout to AngloFalcon for providing his own insight on the hotel.
> 
> Similarly, Happytown and Suitopia were designed from the very few pieces of concept art they received, but we decided to do a bit more with Happytown. Instead of portraying it as the standard "pred ghetto", we took the approach of making it more of a forgotten community, largely abandoned and inhabited only by those too nostalgic or unsavory to move out. We'll see which category Marian Wilde falls in when we meet her next time.
> 
> Really, we're meeting her next time! Honest!
> 
> *ducks another tomato*


	20. Meet the Wildes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Greetings, everyone! The chapter you've been eagerly awaiting is finally here! (I'd like to assume you eagerly await every chapter, but no matter.) We've been really looking forward to writing this one too, and for good reason. Lots of plot stuff here, lots of exposition, and hopefully lots of fun. Enjoy. :)

****

**Chapter 20: Meet the Wildes**

_Grand Palms Hotel_

_Floor 12 - Reynard's Suite_

_2: 33 PM_

There was a long silence as the three foxes stared at each other, the only sound in the room being the quiet sobs of Harvey Montapue on the floor next to them. None of them were quite sure how to proceed, not even Count Reynard himself. Both he and his son had been anticipating this moment, yet they still found themselves at a loss for words actually seeing each other again after so long.

Because of that, it was Finnick who actually spoke up first. "So...heya, Nick. How ya been?"

The taller fox snapped out of his stupor and glared at him. "Could be better. How about you? Dad offered you a better deal, huh?"

"Hey, don't give me that!" Finnick shot back. "I saw an opportunity and I took it! It's the same mentality we've been living by for years, or have you forgotten that since taking up the blue?"

"You think this has been  _easy_ for me?! Why don't  _you_ try changing your entire lifestyle and then tell me how much better-!"

"Hey, anyone know how to spell 'crescendo'?"

Nick and Finnick briefly halted their argument, watching as Reynard typed a lengthy message into his phone. "Uh...c-r-e-s-c-e-n-d-o," Nick said slowly.

"Thanks. And...cre-send-o!" After a few more seconds of rapid clicking, he returned the phone to his pocket, then shifted his focus to the two smaller foxes. "Now boys, let's try to keep things civil. We're all friends here."

" _Former_ friends," Finnick muttered. He stiffened as a cane was placed firmly between him and Nick.

"Be that as it may, I've put waaaaaaay too much time and effort into this arrangement to get derailed over your petty squabbling. I need a little peace and quiet here. Speaking of which…" He turned to the skunk still sobbing on the floor. "GET OUT!"

The arsonist squeaked and scurried out of the room on all fours. "Amazing how little you can do with an insane pyro skunk." Reynard shook his head and turned back to them again. "Now, we're all grown foxes here, so let's just sit down and have a pleasant chat over some tea. Savvy?"

Nick and Finnick looked at each other, more weirded out than angry at the moment. Finnick just shrugged in response, but Nick wasn't about to go along with it that easily. "After all that? You think I'm going to just sit down and have tea with you?"

A few minutes later, he was seated on the plush couch, slowly sipping at his tea with Finnick. He looked down at his cup in silent disbelief.

_What just happened?_

_Man, I'm good._

Reynard turned on the false fireplace again and sat himself down on a stool in front of it, presumably to set the mood. "So what brings you around, son?"

Nick blinked, staring back at him. "Gee, I don't know. Is it the fact that I haven't seen you in over two decades or that you're now a criminal mastermind?"

He smiled back. "You tell me. What matters more to you?"

Nick tried to respond, but couldn't manage it. He grumbled to himself and took another swig of tea. "Whoa, you shut Nick up!" Finnick laughed. "Not bad, old mammal."

Reynard stared hard at his son, lightly tapping the cane on his lap. "But what you  _really_ want is answers, isn't it? You want to know where little ol' me has been all this time. What I've been up to since I walked out of your life."

Putting the tea to the side, Nick nodded. "You tell me what's going on.  _Then_ I'll decide what to do about it."

"I'm pretty curious myself," Finnick admitted. "Nicky boy doesn't like to talk about his past, not even to me."

"You're one to talk,  _Finnegan."_

"Don't you dare-!"

"Very well," Reynard interrupted before they could go at it again. "Let's start from the beginning."

* * *

_Happytown_

_Sherwood Apartments - Room 73_

_2: 35 PM_

It felt like an eternity before the door finally opened. Judy couldn't tell if it was the anxiety of the moment or if the mammal on the other side was just that cautious. In a place like this, she wouldn't doubt either.

The old fox opened the door just a crack, emerald eyes staring down at Judy over a chained lock. "Yes? Who might you be?" There was a hint of trepidation in her voice and Judy mentally kicked herself again for wearing her police uniform here. Probably not the greatest first impression to make.

"I'm Off-er, Judy Hopps, Mrs. Wilde. I work with your son."

"Nicholas…?" she asked softly. "Yes...I've heard of you. You're his partner in the ZPD, right?"

"Yes, that's right." Judy nodded, relieved that she at least knew  _that_ much. It would have been a real challenge convincing the vixen that her son was a cop otherwise. "May I come inside? I want to ask you a few questions."

The crack in the door grew slightly smaller. Could she have phrased that  _any_ more cop-like? "N-Not that you're in trouble or anything. It's about Nick. I want to know more about him and you seemed like the best mammal to ask."

Her sensitive ears picked up a small sigh as Mrs. Wilde looked down at her sadly. "I am sorry, Ms. Hopps, but it's not my place to talk about my son like that. If he doesn't want you to know, maybe that is for the best. Good day."

The door closed.

"Wait!" Judy yelled, banging a fist on the door desperately. She couldn't lose this lead, it was the only one she had! "You don't understand, he's missing! I think he's going after his father!"

"John…"

Judy froze, her ears twitching at the sound of multiple locks swiftly coming undone. The door opened suddenly and she was ushered into the room before she could so much as get a word out. "Come inside. Quickly."

The door slammed shut behind her.

For such an abrupt entrance, the inside of the apartment was warm and cozy, like she was back home with her parents in Bunnyburrow again. The walls were decorated with a light green fern pattern and the tables and chairs made with neatly polished wood. It was clear this lady didn't get visitors very often. Judy coughed uncomfortably. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Wilde."

She smiled. "Please, dear, you can call me Marian." Not the type to show off, she was dressed simply in a violet, button-up shirt and a crimson skirt. Her fur was lighter than Nick's, but greying in several places, even more than someone her age should be. Judy frowned as she realized age wasn't the only cause of gray hairs. "Make yourself at home. I'll whip something up for you." Judy was once again cut off before she could respond as the fox swiftly headed into the kitchen. Not a lot of visitors indeed.

In the interim, she figured she might as well do as she suggested. It would be pretty cruel to try to force information out of this kindly old vixen. So she just sat herself at the table, draped with a floral cloth, and waited for her to return. It was so surreal that a place like this could exist in such unpleasant surroundings.

Her eyes were drawn to a calendar hanging from the wall, one particular date circled in red. She had to squint to read it, but all those carrots were good for something. What she saw threw her for a loop. Could it really be so soon…?

"Sorry for the wait," Marian said, emerging not two minutes later with a small salad of fruit and carrots. "I've never been a very traditional predator," she chuckled.

"I've never been a very traditional prey either." Judy smiled back, taking a bite. For a fox, she definitely had good taste in herbivorous ingredients. She had to introduce her to Gideon sometime. "Thanks for the salad, but I really do need to talk to you about Nick."

Her smile faded, but she nodded. "I know. It's just so nice to have someone over for a change." She folded her paws together and looked her straight in the eyes. "So...John is really back in town?"

"Yes," Judy replied, deciding to leave out the part about him being a murderous criminal for now. "Nick's gone after him and now I'm trying to track them both down. Please, can you tell me more about Nick's past? I don't know who else to turn to for help."

"What's his favorite color?"

Judy quirked an ear. "I'm sorry?"

"His favorite color. What is Nick's favorite color?" Marian repeated, keeping her calm gaze on the bunny.

"...It's orange," Judy answered. Truthfully, she didn't know if that was due to his fur color or his favorite nickname for her, but she felt it a bit conceited to ask.

It was apparently the former anyway as Marian smiled a bit more. "Favorite food?"

"Blueberries."

"Favorite band?"

"Fleetwood Yak."

"Favorite pastime?"

"Slacking off."

After another moment of silence, Marian burst out laughing. "He really hasn't changed much then. Sorry about all that, I was just curious how well you really knew him. You're closer than just partners on the force, I can tell that much already." She winked at her, an expression that only confused Judy more.

"In that case, I will tell you everything."

* * *

_Floor 12_

_2: 48 PM_

"So how should I begin? Once upon a time...it was the best of times, it was the worst of times...a long time ago in a district far, far away…"

"Get on with it!" Finnick growled.

"Hey, a good opening makes the story!" Reynard countered. "Fine. As you may or may not know, Nicholas and I used to live in a small apartment in Happytown, along with my lovely ex-wife, Marian." He smiled wistfully, lost in the memories. "Boy, was she something. I still remember how we met at a roller rink way back when. I was wearing this snazzy yellow jacket as I came up to her, whipping out zinger after zinger. She smelled of the most beautiful-"

"Don't really need to hear about how you and Mom got together," Nick interrupted impatiently.

"I do. This sounds juicy." Finnick smirked.

"No, you're right, I should probably skip ahead a bit," Reynard said, making the smaller fox snap his fingers in disappointment. "Point is, the three of us had a pretty good life together, as far as foxes in the slums go at least. We both had a decent income and a good share of fond memories, but what really mattered to us was our son, Nicholas. He was our pride and joy and we both wanted nothing more than what was best for him."

He frowned, those fond memories coming to a sudden halt. "Unfortunately, that's an area where we had some...disagreement." Nick looked away, knowing exactly where he was going with this.

But Finnick didn't. "Disagreement about what?"

* * *

_Room 73_

_2: 52 PM_

"I knew what kind of mammal John was. I knew what kind of activities he got up to when he thought I wasn't looking." Marian sighed, stirring a small glass of water with her claw. "He was a con artist through and through. Called himself 'Honest John', going out to street corners and pawning off all kinds of useless junk on mammals, gambling in rigged games, even ripping off our own friends and neighbors. He eventually made enough money legitimately to support us, but he just couldn't help himself. He went and opened this tailor shop called 'Suitopia' with Nick, and even though it  _seemed_  like an honest business, I bet I could find evidence of wrongdoing if I knew more about tailoring."

"And you still married him?" Judy asked, trying not to sound judgemental.

"Mammals around here do whatever they can to survive," she said bluntly. "I couldn't hold it against him just for being raised in less ideal circumstances than myself. Besides, it was all relatively harmless fun. It wasn't like he ever actually  _hurt_ anyone."

Judy winced. That was clearly no longer the case.

"I still remember when we first met at a roller rink. He was wearing this ridiculous yellow jacket and tried to woo me with a bunch of cheesy puns. But he had a certain charm to him that I couldn't ignore and I fell for him anyway. I'm sure you understand that."

She paused and stared pointedly at Judy, making her a bit uncomfortable. "Uh…"

"So I turned a blind eye to his activities," she continued. "But…"

"But you didn't want Nick to be raised the same way," Judy guessed.

"That's right," she said firmly. "Our son deserved better, a future where he didn't have to cheat and steal his way through life. I tried to instill in him the belief that anyone really can be anything."

"And John didn't like that?"

"No. He believed that such a 'naive' attitude would only get him slaughtered. I've lost count of the number of times we've argued about it. But for the sake of our son, we never let it divide us." Her paw gripped the cup tightly. "At least not until...the incident."

Judy's ears flattened. She had a pretty good idea exactly what "the incident" was. "You mean...with the Junior Ranger Scouts?"

Her eyes widened in surprise. "So you know about even that? My, he really  _has_ opened up to you." Again, the vixen shot her a sly smile she wasn't sure how to interpret. What a strange mammal.

But the smile didn't last. "That was the beginning of the end for our family…"

* * *

_Floor 12_

_3: 03 PM_

_Nick hadn't stopped crying since he got home. He hadn't even bothered to change out of his uniform, even though he knew he would never be wearing it again. He had been so confident, so full of hope that the Junior Ranger Scouts would accept him. That was what Mom said. Was he just fooling himself? That was what Dad said._

_He should've just kept it to himself. He never should have let them see that it got to him. If he had, then maybe he wouldn't be alone in his room right now, listening helplessly to the results of his actions. They had told him to go to bed hours ago, but how could he?_

" _I warned you this would happen! I told you from the beginning that they would never accept a fox! And now look at what they did!_

" _Don't you dare blame_  me _for this! I was only trying to give our son a future!"_

" _What is_  that _supposed to mean?"_

" _You think I don't know about you sneaking him out to your little casinos and back alley rigs? Teaching him all of those horrid tricks!"_

" _Hey, those are valuable life skills, especially for our kind! At least I'm owning up to who he is instead of dressing him up in a fancy uniform and parading him around like he doesn't know any better! Face the facts, Marian! If it weren't for me, the poor tod probably wouldn't even have made it back home tonight!_

_The next thing Nick heard was not a voice, but a loud, resounding slap. His breath caught in his chest._

" _Get out."_

" _M-Marian, I-"_

" _Get OUT! My son is going to have a better life, and that starts with taking you out of it!"_

_Nick covered his mouth, stifling a gasp. She couldn't mean…_

_There were more noises, some scuffling feet, claws hitting wood, muffled shouts, and then a slammed door. But Nick stayed silent, not making any sound of his own until everything else went quiet. Only then did he chance leaving his room. His instincts were screaming at him to just stay put, but he couldn't ignore something like this._

_He creaked open the door just enough to peek his head out. Both of his parents were gone, in opposite directions. From down the hall, he could hear a faint crying that belonged to his mother. As much as he wanted to run in and comfort her, she wasn't the one who needed it most right now._

_Knowing Mom was preoccupied, Nick crept up to the front door and unlocked it, stepping out of the apartment._

" _You should've stayed in bed, Nicholas."_

_Nick jumped as his father's voice reached him. John Wilde was not as "gone" as he seemed, leaning against the wall of their apartment only a few feet away. Nick immediately reached up to wipe his tears away, but the older fox wasn't in the greatest shape himself. His eyes were sunken and he seemed to have a perpetual frown glued to his muzzle. "I...I just wanted to make sure you were okay," Nick said weakly._

_That didn't get him to smile, but it at least got his attention. "You really are too naive for your own good. I'm not sure if that's due to my failings or your mother's influence. I'm not even sure it matters anymore."_

_Nick couldn't find any words, just staring listlessly as his father crouched down to his level, placing a paw on his shoulder. "Listen, son, your father has to leave for a while. I'm not sure when I'll be back, but I promise you that I_  will. _And until then, I need you to be strong for me." He reached up and caught another tear that Nick hadn't noticed he shed. "Can you do that for me, son?"_

_Nick felt tears welling up again, but nodded. Never let them see that they get to you, not even Dad._

" _Good. Now it isn't much, but I want you to have something to remember me by." John put his arms behind his head and unclasped his tie. Before Nick could react, his father fastened it around his own neck, the oversized accessory dragging on the floor. "There. It might be a bit big now, but one day you are going to_  rock _that look."_

_The tod finally managed a smile as John ruffled his headfur and stood up again, finally smiling. "You make me so proud, son. I can't wait to see what you grow up into."_

_Then John turned on his heel and left, like it was just another day for him. Nick was too stunned to even leave the hallway._

"Whoa, hold up,  _that's_ where you got that tacky tie?" Finnick asked incredulously.

"It is not tacky!" both Wildes yelled back. Nick found himself clenching that tie again and growled as he slapped his paw away.

"Heh. How long have you been doing  _that_ before you noticed?" Reynard chuckled. "I'm flattered that I've had such a profound effect on you."

"Especially considering you've been gone most of my life," Nick replied. Reynard visibly flinched.

Finnick burst out laughing. "And Nick gets one back on Daddy! This is just getting better and better!"

Reynard extended his cane so that the tip touched his son's shoulder. "I...I really am sorry about that. You know I would have stuck around if I could." Nick scoffed. "And even so, I took precautions to ensure you would be in safe paws."

Nick was suspicious, but still curious. "What kind of precautions?"

* * *

_Room 73_

_3: 10 PM_

"To this day, I wonder if he knew."

"Knew what?" Judy asked, long having put down the salad. She was far too engrossed in the story to eat it.

"Knew that Nicholas would run away." Marian shook, tears threatening to fall from her eyes. Judy immediately felt guilty for dredging up such terrible memories again. "I should have seen it coming. He had suffered such severe trauma in just one night, yet he fell right back into his usual self like nothing ever happened. It didn't seem to bother him at all."

 _Never let them see that they get to you._ "He wouldn't let you in."

"Countless times I tried to get him to open up," she said, frustrated. "But he would always change the subject or give me blind reassurances. You can't imagine how much it hurt to see my son like that. And then, one day soon after...he didn't come home from school." She sighed, the heartbreaking sigh of a mother without a son. "In just a matter of days, I had lost my entire family. And I never even saw it coming. I'm a terrible mother."

"Don't say that!" Judy was quick to interject. "You were only doing what you thought was right! Nick  _did_ need a better influence!"

"Perhaps, but was it worth it? For years, I had no idea where my own son was, or if he was even alive. And I knew that if he was, he would be relying on John's teachings, not mine. I had done nothing but drive him away."

As much as she wanted to comfort her, Judy couldn't find a way to rebuke that. "Was he really that hard to find?" She would have had trouble finding him during the Night Howler Incident if not for Finnick, but even so, Nick never struck her as particularly stealthy, especially with that gaudy shirt of his.

"I couldn't even find a trace of him," Marian replied. "And the ZPD was of no help, not that I expected them to be for some stray fox from Happytown. No offense," she added, seeing Judy's crestfallen expression.

"No, I get it. Not every cop is all for making the world a better place, at least not for every _one_. I just don't understand how Nick could have vanished like that."

"I have a theory." Her ears perked up at that. "John knew his son, even better than I did, I admit. And despite his twisted ideals, his love for him was genuine. He wouldn't have left him just like that. I just know it."

"Then...you think John contacted him again?"

"No, I caught Nick's scent here and there, but never his. I believe he really did leave the city that day. But still...he had something to do with it. I just know it."

From what little Judy knew of the mysterious Count, she was inclined to agree.

* * *

_Floor 12_

_3: 13 PM_

"The crime lords?!" Nick shouted, flabbergasted. "You asked the  _crime lords_ to look after me?"

"Hey, I never got the chance to teach you all that I knew," Reynard said defensively. "Being the most successful criminals in Zootopia, they were the best option left. So before I left the city, I went to each of them, laid out my problem, and asked them for a favor. A favor to take you in and keep you safe should the need arise."

"So you mean to tell me that when Mr. Big's guys picked me up off the street, it was because of your  _favor?"_ Nick shook his head in disbelief. "I always wondered what those polar bears were doing in Sahara Square…"

"Okay, so Big agreed to your terms. What about the other four?" asked Finnick.

Reynard's paws clenched around his cane, his muzzle forming into a scowl. "The other four...they refused me. All of them. Said you were too much of a liability, or you couldn't be trusted, or they just didn't like me." His scowl became more and more pronounced. "Even Mr. Big rescinded on the deal over some stinking rug."

A chill ran down Nick's spine. "That's why, isn't it? That's why you're killing them all. Because of me."

"Those self-centered bastards dared to reject  _my_  son? They all got what was coming to them," he answered darkly. "Who would've thought that your true salvation would come from a little fox in a big van?" He turned his gaze to Finnick, who was so thoroughly disturbed that he didn't even take offense. "Thank you for taking such good care of my boy, Finnick."

"N-No problem."

"So after that, I left Zootopia and-"

"Whoa, wait a minute!" Nick stopped him. "You can't drop a bombshell like that and just  _keep going!"_

Reynard paused, as if confused that someone actually interrupted him. "There will be time for questions at the end of the presentation." He put his cane to Nick's lips. "Now shush."

He begrudgingly shushed.

* * *

_Room 73_

_3: 21 PM_

"And you never saw him again?" Judy asked.

"No, John walked out of my life that day. He never even tried to contact me."

"I meant Nick," she clarified. He had mentioned his mother even back then, and it didn't  _sound_ like they were that badly estranged. Or was that just more of Nick's mask shielding his emotions? She doubted her own ability to see through it anymore.

A small smile teased at her lips. "Not in person, no. But after a while, he started sending me letters, postcards, photographs...everything except just talking to me. I suppose he wanted to at least reassure me he was still okay."

"So you stopped looking for him?"

"I was afraid," she admitted. "Afraid that if tried to find him, he would only retreat more. Enough for him to even cut contact with me again. If I lost even that small comfort...I don't know what I would do."

"I think  _he's_  the one that's afraid." Marian looked at her curiously. "He doesn't show it, he never does, but that's just how Nick is. The more he hides something, the more it hurts him. I bet he's been wracked with guilt over running away, all these years." After having lived in such a large family all her life, she couldn't even imagine being so alone. She shot the vixen a smile. "As soon as I find Nick, I'm going to  _make_ him come back."

Finally, a real smile came to the vixen's lips again.

* * *

_Floor 12_

_3: 26 PM_

"I was on my own for a while after that, in even worse shape than you probably. I fell back into my usual tricks, got a few marks here and there." He rubbed the back of his head, almost embarrassed. "But those guys out in the suburbs,  _man_ are they suspicious of our kind. I underestimated how much harder it would be to make a living away from the city."

"You don't exactly look impoverished," Nick noted, rolling his eyes. "So how did you go from  _that_ to 'Count Reynard' anyway?" He even added the air quotes.

"Glad you asked!" As the sudden grin on his face said just as clearly. "It was actually kind of a breakthrough for me. See, I realized that this bias the local populace had against me could be turned to my advantage."

Nick and Finnick shared a raised eyebrow. Not  _once_ had prejudice against foxes ever helped them. "How so?" Nick asked incredulously.

He looked away, idly examining his claws. "You ever heard of Fox Away?"

"You mean that brand of anti-vulpine products that hurt like a mofo?" Finnick growled and crossed his arms. "What of it?"

"I invented it."

"What?!" Nick nearly lunged off the couch at him. "You mean that stuff is just a scam?!"

"No way! It works way too well to be a scam!" Finnick argued.

"Of course it  _works._ " Reynard smiled, more than a little amused by this display. "It works about as well as any other deterrent, I imagine. But those gullible bunnies out in the burrows? All I had to do was slap on an anti-fox label, bribe a few of their own to peddle the stuff, and they gladly paid double, even  _triple_ the price for it!" He giggled to himself. "The Fox Taser is my personal favorite, right up there with the Fox Net and Fox Rope."

"I'm not hearing this!" Finnick yelled, covering his ears. "I did not get tased by glorified snake oil!"

"With the entire population of Bunnyburrow eating out of my paws, is it any wonder I've made such a generous income?" Reynard asked, wiggling his eyebrows.

 _You've gotta be kidding me! You take advantage or our own species and you don't even care?!_ He couldn't imagine the number of foxes who had suffered because of his father's lust for power. He was going to tell Judy to make her family ditch that Fox Away stuff ASAP!

"So you formed your little syndicate in Bunnyburrow," Nick continued abruptly, fighting down his indignation. "That still doesn't explain why you came back."

He had the gall to actually look  _hurt._ "Isn't that obvious? I made a heck of a living out there, sure. Got myself a fancy townhouse in Foxden, loyal thugs, a new car,  _this_  thing." He waved his cane around. "But even after all the fame and fortune I raked in, I couldn't escape one simple fact: I  _missed_ you, son. And nothing could replace you, no matter how hard she tried."

_"She?"_

"No matter how hard I tried," he amended. "I needed you in my life again, Nicholas. I wasn't getting any younger, and who better to take over the family business than you? But then...I saw something in the news…"

Nick really didn't like where this was going.

* * *

_Room 73_

_3: 38 PM_

"I knew he made the right choice of partner," Marian said warmly. "I knew it ever since the day I got  _this."_

Judy watched curiously as she headed out of the kitchen, returning a few moments later with a scrap of newspaper that had long since degraded, gently unfolding the paper and placing it on the table. Judy already had a pretty good idea what she would find as she read the headline of the cut article.

" _First Fox Officer Joins the ZPD: Nicholas Wilde Receives His Badge!"_

"Nicholas never told me about this development, perhaps he thought I wouldn't believe him, but we  _do_ still get the news out here." She tapped a claw on the image of Judy giving Nick his badge, a moment the bunny remembered just as fondly. "I almost fainted at the sight. Just when I had given up hope in him ever being more than just another shifty fox, he does something like this."

The tears almost started again as she fixed her eyes on Nick's smiling face. "I was  _so_ proud."

* * *

_Floor 12_

_3: 38 PM_

"I was  _so_ pissed!" He slammed the cane down onto the carpeted floor, making a very unintimidating thump. "My son, a police officer?! What a joke!"

Nick kept himself restrained, but felt his fists starting to shake, his upper lip curling.

"But I knew it wasn't your fault." He'd lost his fury as quickly as he'd gained it, and Nick forced himself to do the same lest he show any more weakness around him. "I blamed myself, really. Had I been around, you never would have lost your way, and now you were in greater danger than ever. It was then and there that I knew I had to do something."

He rose from his seat and moved across the room, watched intently by both other foxes, until he stopped in front of the large window looking out at Sahara Square. " _That_ is why I came back, son. I'm going to form the most powerful criminal empire Zootopia has ever seen, then give it all to you. Consider it a gift, my  _atonement_ , for leaving you on your own for so many years."

"I already have a job," Nick said, pushing himself off the couch and approaching him. "And I'm  _not_ alone. Sorry, Dad, but my answer is no. What are you going to do about it?"

Reynard turned around, staring hard into his eyes. Just this once, he wished he could tell what his father was thinking.

* * *

_Room 73_

_3: 42 PM_

"You'll see him again soon, I promise you that."

Marian slowly looked up again, seeing the bunny's small smile greeting her.

In half a second, she wrapped her arms around Judy and pulled her into a tight hug. "Thank you."

Marian Wilde didn't seem to know her own strength, at least not compared to that of a bunny. Judy was faced with the dilemma of either hurting the vixen's feelings any more by telling her to stop or risk choking to death. Being Judy Hopps, she gave her all the time she needed.

By the time Marian released her, Judy's shoulder was left soaked. "I'm sorry...I don't know what came over me."

"It's okay…" Judy said, still a little winded. "I know how hard this must be on you."

She nodded solemnly. "Bring my son home, Judy Hopps. You're the only one who can."

Shaking it off, Judy was quick to take the vixen's paws in her own. "I will."

Marian wiped a tear from her eye, slowly smiling wider.

A sudden knock at the door ruined the moment. "Sorry, that's probably my neighbor wanting his copy of the morning paper. We keep trying to catch the mailmammal and sort this out, but he never sticks around here long enough. Excuse me." She let out a welcome laugh and headed out of the kitchen, leaving Judy seated at the table.

As sweet as the old vixen was, Judy knew she couldn't stick around much longer. She had gained a wealth of information today; now she had to put it to good use and fulfill the promise she made to Marian. But where to go from here? The name 'Suitopia' had come up in the story, the name of John's old tailor shop. Could that be where Nick was going? It wasn't far from here, so it could be worth a look. She should probably call Carla and Jimmy to give them an update as well. She felt a bit guilty for just ditching them to go after Nick, and maybe they had learned something too-

*BANG*

The piercing sound completely derailed Judy's train of thought. She had spent too much time on the force not to recognize that sound. "Marian!"

She rushed out of the kitchen as fast as she could, berating herself for letting the vixen go alone. Her worst fears were realized as she saw Marian standing in the doorway, opened only slightly, but enough for the bullet to pierce her. She slowly turned around, staring at Judy with listless eyes as a pool of blood formed around her abdomen. She tried to speak, but couldn't even get a word out before she collapsed to the floor, motionless.

There was another loud bang as the door was kicked open, bringing Judy face to face with the perpetrator. Her eyes narrowed.  _"You!"_

Felix smiled back. "An eye for an eye."

* * *

_Floor 12_

_4: 12 PM_

"So...what are you going to do?" Nick asked again, unnerved by the silence.

Reynard blinked, refocusing his eyes. "Hmm? Oh sorry, I was lost in thought for a moment. I'm not going to do anything."

"...Excuse me?"

"Son, you're a grown adult and you can make your own decisions." He casually sat himself on top of the railing. "If you don't want to join my cause, so be it. I can wait." He lifted an arm and started examining his claws. "Who am I to come into your life again after all these years and try to dictate your future?"

Nick's jaw dropped. He looked back at Finnick just to make sure he wasn't losing it, to which the fennec had no reply. "You don't want to dictate my future? What do you call getting me suspended from the force?!"

"Oh, I wouldn't worry about that." He waved his paw at him. "You and I both know that investigation will go nowhere, as I intended. You'll be back on the force in no time. The only reason I even bothered with that little prank was to teach you an important lesson."

"What, that you're still kind of a dick?" he asked sardonically.

He chuckled softly. "Tell me, how long did it take them to turn against you, Nicholas? After all the time and effort you put into solving the Night Howler case, completing your training in the academy, working to stop crimes, they were awfully quick to assume that you'd fallen back into your old habits. Do you think they'll treat you any better once you're back?"

"Well, I...I…" Damn it, why couldn't he ever get a word out around this guy?

"No matter what outfit you put on in the morning, no matter what you do and who you try to help, you'll always be just another shifty fox to them." He looked at him with an expression that could only be described as pity. "What do you think you're going to accomplish living this lie? Even if you  _did_ earn their respect, it's not like it's going to improve the lives of every  _other_ fox out there. At most, you'll just be one of the 'good ones'. The exception, not the rule. That's a lesson you'd learned a long time ago. Shame you seem to have forgotten it."

He finally found his voice. "You're wrong, Dad," he growled. "The world is more than just a bunch of pre-defined roles.  _That's_ what I've learned."

If anything, Reynard only got  _more_ relaxed. "Welp. I guess we can't agree on everything. So what now?"

"What are you talking about?"

"I've already said my piece. You're free to leave at any time." He pointed his cane at the door. "So I'll ask again...what now?"

It didn't take Nick long to decide. "What do you  _think?"_ he said, stepping towards him. "I don't care why you're doing this. I don't care that this is all some twisted homecoming present to you. I don't even care that you're my father. You  _murdered_  three mammals!"

"I prefer to think of it as a 'permanent hustle', or 'perma-hus' for short. And I'm pretty sure I've perma-hussed more than three by now…"

Nick stopped right in front of him, narrowing his eyes threateningly. "You must be crazy to think I'd ever go along with this."

"Crazy like a fox?"

"No, crazy like a crazy person! And I'm bringing you in."

"Ah ah ah." He wagged his finger at him. "Have you forgotten already? You don't have the authority to arrest me."

Nick didn't falter. "I can make a citizen's arrest. I've witnessed you committing a crime."

"True, but  _when_ did you witness that again?" he asked, leaning in uncomfortably close. "Oh yeah, back in the Rainforest District. And you've had plenty of time to report it since. Pretty sure you can get more than a suspension for withholding that."

Nick winced. He had him there.

 _Standing right in front of me and you_  still _can't do anything. Pathetic._

He shook his head and grabbed his father's arm. "I'll figure it out later. For now, you're coming with me."

He tugged on Reynard's sleeve, but the older fox didn't budge. "So you can hold me in your little cell until you figure out what to do about me? Sorry, Nicholas, but I'm not going to make it  _that_ easy."

His other paw reached down and jabbed two fingers into his cane's eye sockets. The mouth of the headpiece opened and a plume of smoke rushed out, quickly filling the confined space. Nick reeled back and coughed, along with Finnick. The smoke soon filtered out through the open balcony doors and dissipated, but by the time it did, Reynard was already gone. "Damn, where is he?!" Nick looked around the room frantically.

A sharp whistle brought his attention back to the doorway, where Reynard now stood waving at him. "But there's no fun in an absolute victory either. How about a game of Cops and Robbers to settle the score? Catch me if you can!" Reynard laughed and rushed out the door. Nick was quick to race off, in hot pursuit.

Left alone in the room, Finnick threw up his arms and walked away. "Screw this, I'm going in the hot tub."

* * *

_Room 73_

_4: 14 PM_

Despite months of training on the ZPD, Judy's nose started twitching as if she were just a scared little bunny at the Carrot Day's Festival again. She never expected to see this wolf again, especially not like  _this._

"Why?" was all she could manage to say.

He sniffed. "Like I said, an eye for an eye. Wilde killed my mother, so I killed his."

"Nick…?"

"His father. Not like it matters." He lowered the gun and put it back to his side with the ease of a trained professional. "I won't rest until they  _all_ meet the same fate."

"It was  _you,_ " Judy said, her deductive mind piecing it all together. " _You're_  the one who burned down Nick's house!"

"Yes, and I'm the one who followed you all the way here," he sneered. "Thanks for that."

Her ears dropped in horror. Nick's house being lit up as soon as she left it, that feeling of being watched, the flash of grey that just barely escaped her view...she had led him right to her.

Without any regard for her emotional turmoil, Felix turned and left the apartment. Judy regained her composure in a flash and went to pursue him, but the crumpled form of Marian Wilde caught her attention.  _Worry about him later, Judy! She needs your help!_

Judy rushed to the vixen's side and gently rolled her over, placing an ear to her chest. Even with her delicate hearing, she couldn't tell if she was even still breathing. With no time to lose, she reached for her phone to dial 911.

She listened closely as the phone dialed, agonizingly slow, while the sounds of a scuffle came faintly from outside. "911. Please state the nature of your emergency."

 _Oh sweet cheese and thank you!_ "Come quickly, someone has been shot! The address is on Pine Road, Sherwood Apartments-"

The wall in front of her exploded, Felix's large form having been flung violently through it. Dust and plaster spread into the air as another mammal Judy really didn't want to see again came in through the hole, glaring daggers at the wolf.

"You  _really_ shouldn't have done that," Simon snarled, cracking his knuckles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Phew! Hope you enjoyed this chapter, because it was by far the most difficult to organize, assemble, and write out of any of them. It was SO difficult that it's almost single-handedly responsible for this latest gap between updates. Thank you, Mr. and Ms. Wilde, for having so damn much to say.
> 
> This setup, as in John and Marian telling two sides of the same story to two different mammals at the same time, was planned for a long while, so much of the arc up to this point has been about getting both Nick and Judy to their respective destinations in tandem. It was easier than it sounds, though it did require a bit of contrived plot driving. But the end result was too much fun to regret it.
> 
> Regardless, tell us what you think of Marian Wilde, and the various sides to John Wilde. Also if any of the various reveals made in this chapter struck a chord with you. Fox Away being a fox-run scam is a headcanon I've joked about long before writing this, so it was a real pleasure to actually make it part of the story. That scene in particular is also hinting at something major we have planned for this story...or perhaps another story.
> 
> Apologies for the distinct lack of Carla and Jimmy, but it was kind of awkward trying to shove them into this. There will be plenty of them next time, not to worry.


	21. The Wilde Boys

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As some generous reviewers have pointed out, we've passed the one year anniversary of Born to Be Wilde a little while back. Sure wish we could have gotten this out then, but thank you anyway. I'm happy to say that after a long absence caused by a combination of real life factors and a burnout of motivation, both of us are feeling pumped to get back into the story. Thank you for sticking with us in spite of that. :)
> 
> As a reward for your patience, we present not only the longest chapter yet, but a snazzy commission of Count Reynard from the skilled paws of Quirky-Middle-Child. Go check it out on Deviantart! (Or Reynard will be unhappy and nobody wants that.) There's also been a ton of Lucy Sang fanart lately, thanks to Upplet and "When Instinct Falls", so that's something to keep an eye out for as well. Go follow his story if you aren't already, seriously.
> 
> So how's everyone enjoying the arc so far? We're roughly halfway through it now, so hold on tight because the crazy (like a fox) train has only just left the station!
> 
> Our usual beta DarkFlameWolf was unable to do it this time, so a big shoutout to President Stalkeyes and Cimar of Turalis Wildehopps for taking over as emergency betas.

****

**Chapter 21: The Wilde Boys**

_Grand Palms Hotel_

_Floor 12_

_4: 25 PM_

It was around this point that Nick really regretted not having any better plan than "talk to Dad and try to figure something out". Needless to say, he hadn't, aside from losing even the tiniest shred of doubt that his father had to be stopped. Actually  _stopping_ him, however, was going to be no small feat.

Both figuratively and literally because the guy barely even slowed down. "Step it up, son! I've got like three decades on you!" Reynard taunted, spinning around to point the end of his cane at the pursuing Nick.

The younger fox dove to the ground as what appeared to be a small ink capsule shot out of the tip, coating the floor behind him in the sticky substance. He felt bad for the cleaning lady who had to deal with that. "How many functions does that thing  _have?!"_

"Enough." He shrugged, turning and making a mad dash into the elevator. Nick scrambled back to his feet as quickly as he could, but he was only fast enough to catch his father's mocking wave before the elevator doors closed in his face.

He wasted a few seconds pounding on the call button before he realized it would do him no good. Instead, he made for the stairwell, keeping a keen ear out for the rumbling of the elevator as it descended next to him. It was thankfully only a few flights before it came to a stop, and a panting Nick rushed out of the stairwell and in front of the doors as they opened again.

Reynard was nowhere in sight.

"Seriously? Again?" Nick put both paws on the sides of the elevator and stuck his head inside.

He realized that he had been played just a second too late. He only caught a glimpse of Reynard in his peripheral vision before the old tod swung down from the ceiling and kicked him square in the face. "You're losing your touch! At least give me a challenge here!" he laughed, leaving his son in the dust as he took off down the hall.

Nick tried not to be embarrassed. Falling for something like that after all his years on the street? Maybe he  _was_ losing his touch.

But that just meant it was time to find it again.

"Watch me," Nick growled, continuing the chase.

* * *

_Happytown_

_Sherwood Apartments - Room 73_

_4: 32 PM_

Judy watched with silent trepidation, her frantic eyes traveling from Simon to Felix and back, unwilling to let either of them out of her sight, all the while trying to keep watch of the injured Marian as well. But even rabbit eyes could only do so much.

"Excuse me? Miss? What was the address?"

Judy's scattered attention was forcefully brought back to the operator on the other end of the phone, which her mind quickly registered as the priority. "Happytown, Pine Road, Sherwood Apartments, Room 73. And connect me with the ZPD while you're at it. The shooter is still on the premises, along with another wanted criminal."

No matter how much experience this 911 operator might have had, they were obviously not trained for this scenario. "What?! I-I mean, the police and medical services are already on their way! Now find a safe place to hide until help arrives-"

"With all due respect, I am  _not_ leaving a wounded mammal alone with these lunatics. I'm staying right here," Judy said firmly, keeping her eyes on said lunatics.

"You…" Felix said darkly, recognizing the raccoon instantly. He slowly rose to his feet as he raised his gun.

Simon didn't respond with words, simply reacting to the threat. He was already on the move, swinging his metal leg up into the wolf's wrist and knocking the gun from his grip. The weapon slid towards Judy, who cautiously placed her foot on it. "And I've also secured the murder weapon."

Another pause, during which she could hear the operator trying and failing to discreetly call their supervisor over for assistance. Judy's other foot tapped in frustration. So much for quick response.

"Do you have any idea what you've just cost me?!" Simon roared, aiming another kick at Felix's leg that could have well broken it. But Felix was not to be caught by surprise twice and dodged to the side, aiming a punch at the raccoon. Simon grabbed his arm and threw him to the side, ramming into him as he stumbled and sending them both into a shelf. The mammalian mercenaries grappled with each other whilst knocking over several sentimental items.

"Just get over here!" Judy yelled, hanging up the phone and ducking out of the way of a stray picture frame as it sailed past, hitting the ground and shattering next to her. She couldn't help but notice that it was the very same picture she had seen in Nick's house, the image of Marian now ominously cracked. "Hang in there, Marian…" she urged, tearing off a small bit of cloth from her shirt and fashioning a makeshift bandage. Thank goodness for required medical training in the ZPD.

It didn't take long for Felix and Simon's brawl to bring them into the kitchen, the former throwing the latter onto the table and breaking it. Simon quickly snapped off one of the table's legs and used it to block a kick from the wolf, breaking it again in the process. Felix then landed a punch to Simon's nose and pinned down his arms, grinning sadistically as he attempted to strangle the raccoon. Struggling for breath, Simon just managed to reach out and grab onto a nice big splinter to stab into the wolf's paw. Felix screamed and loosened his grip, allowing Simon to yank him closer and counter with a vicious headbutt.

Felix stepped back, pulling the splinter out forcefully. "I have to admit, I'm impressed. You're putting up a better fight than the bear."

"I've been doing this for a while," Simon replied, reaching inside his jacket. "And by the way, I have one of these too." In a flash, he pulled out his own gun and fired it.

Had Felix been any less skilled himself, he would have been shot dead for real this time. But by the time Simon went for his gun, the wolf was already diving into a roll. The shot destroyed a nearby teacup as Felix took position next to the kitchen's fridge and toppled it in front of him to block the next shot, spilling its contents all over the floor.

Judy winced, in the midst of attempting CPR. If Marian recovered from this, she would have some serious renovations to do.

When!  _When_ she recovered from this, she reminded herself. She took another uneasy glance down at the unmoving vixen, frustrated at her own helplessness. There was only so much she could do, an unwelcome reality for the rabbit who only wanted to make the world a better place.

Simon reflexively backed away from the spilled produce, which gave Felix the opening to dive from the top of the fridge and onto him. The raccoon fired off another shot as he was tackled to the ground, shattering a light above them as they wrestled for the weapon.

"Actually...I think I've heard of you," Felix strained, surprised by the smaller mammal's strong grip. "You're Simon VanDal, right?"

"What of it?" Simon elbowed Felix in the chin and attempted to point his gun right under it, but Felix brought down his arm and knocked it to the side again.

"Ah yes, the great 'One-Legged Bandit'. How's that stump holding up?" he mocked, aiming a punch for the raccoon's forehead that he rolled away from.

"Don't pretend you know me," Simon shot back, said leg whipping up into the wolf's crotch. Felix gasped and doubled over in pain, but as Simon reached for the gun, the wolf turned his head and literally bit into it, throwing his head to the side and removing the weapon from play. This one also landed near Judy, who mentally added something else to watch onto the list.

"I know enough." Felix smirked, kicking Simon away and getting back up. "Tell me, does the name 'Kyle VanDal' sound familiar to you?"

Simon, about to rush in for another attack, froze on the spot. It was just for a second, but it was all Felix needed.

Before the raccoon could react, the empty and open fridge was thrown on top of him, trapping him inside the cold coffin. Felix jumped onto it just for good measure, then took off through the front door of the apartment, not even sparing Judy or his unfortunate victim a second glance.

A loud banging immediately took her attention back to the fridge as Simon kicked it off, an impressive feat for one so small. Bruised, shivering, and covered in food residue, the raccoon immediately snatched up his dropped gun and went to pursue the wolf. He, however, stopped for just a moment to look over Marian's prone form. "Is she going to be okay?"

Judy's ears perked up, in confusion more than anything. Why did  _he_  care? "I...I don't know."

"Damn." He looked down and shook his head. "Kyle...I'm sorry."

The sound of sirens blared in the distance, quickly growing louder as the seconds flashed by. Snapped out of whatever trance he was in, Simon spared no more time and fled the premises. Judy realized that she probably should have tried to stop him, but her mind was too addled to even process what just happened. Especially that name she overheard: Kyle VanDal. It sounded familiar to be sure, and not from that long ago either, but she just couldn't place it...

Seconds later, emergency services rushed in, and suddenly she didn't care about anything else anymore. "Over here! Hurry!"

* * *

_Grand Palms Hotel_

_Floor 10 - Sahara Spa_

_4: 34 PM_

Nick stayed on Reynard's tail as he headed through a pair of large, double doors. He braced himself and plowed through them with his shoulder.

Immediately greeted by the smell of sweat and incense, his nostrils flared up in response. Various mammals getting various treatments in various states of dress lounged all around him. Decorated with tile floors and sand-coated walls, the Sahara Spa was the perfect place for desert mammals to relax. Shame that relaxation was the absolute last thing on Nick's mind right now.

It certainly didn't help him find Reynard, and it felt awkward to look when everyone in the room was now staring at him. "Uh...sorry, guys. I'll be out of your fur in just a bit. Just gotta...find my dad."  _Stop talking, Nick._

"You mean that fox behind you?" a hippo in a hot tub helpfully pointed out.

Nick yelped at a sudden, sharp pain in his backside. Unamused, he turned and glowered at the snickering Reynard, still holding the rolled-up towel he'd just used to smack his son in the buttocks. "Real mature. What are you, five?"

"Yep. Five steps ahead of  _you_." Tossing the towel onto the end of his cane, he twirled it around and flung it at Nick's face. The younger fox swatted it aside and made a lunge for his father, who did a frontflip over his head and landed near a group of bathers.

"Hey, buddy, you're blocking my view!" a coyote protested, standing out of the tub.

Reynard pushed him back in. "Well, you're not blocking  _mine_ unfortunately. It's bad enough that a quarter of my guys are naturalists."

"Which reminds me, I still owe you for Fangs and Boomer," Nick said, coming up from behind and trapping Reynard between him and the tub.

"Oh, don't worry, I already took care of them," Reynard smirked back, ears perked toward the sound of an approaching cart. "Can't have it getting too  _steamy_  around the workplace, you know!" His cane lashed out and struck the cart as it passed by, spilling a large pile of hot rocks into the tub.

"Crap!" Nick shielded his eyes as both steam and the shouts of irate mammals now filled the room. Combined with the overpowering smells, it almost completely obscured his senses. Reynard could be hiding anywhere. Nick looked back and forth cautiously, trying in vain to detect any sign of him.

_Great. He's probably flown the coop already._

_You really think I want to_ lose _you? You know I can't resist this kind of fun._

_Then you're probably going to try and sneak attack me from behind. Nah, too obvious._

_Perhaps, but you won't see me coming from_  any _angle until it's too late, so choose wisely._

_Then I choose none of the above._

Nick crouched down on the spot, soon hearing the distinct whoosh of a cane flying over his head. He immediately swept out with his leg and felt it make contact. As the steam dissipated, it was more than a little satisfying to stand back up with his father now lying at his feet. "How's it feel to be outfoxed?"

Reynard lifted his head up slightly, wiping away a small trickle of blood from his bruised nose and staring at it, almost fascinated. "Let me get back to you on that. It's a new experience for me." He looked up at him, a proud smile on his muzzle. "That's my boy."

Nick tried to ignore that. "Ready to give up yet?"

"Hardly. I'm having way too much fun!"

_Told ya._

Nick attempted to subdue him just as Reynard tried to roll away, an effort that sent them both into the water. The other mammals were quick to clear out as they engaged in an aquatic wrestling match that ended with Reynard dunking his son. The two soaking wet foxes scrambled out of the tub, one giggling and one seething.

"Ahhhhh, right there…that's nice…" sighed a large bison, face down on a mat with a pair of attractive mountain lions massaging his back. The felines' gentle purring turned to loud shrieks as they quickly leapt off, replaced by the wet Wildes.

"Alright, boy, let's see how that fancy ZPD training matches up with my street skills." Reynard launched a fast kick at his side, which Nick caught, then attempted an elbow to the stomach. Reynard blocked it with the cane, then pushed back to free his leg and stabbed the cane at Nick again. Nick promptly dodged and punched him in the throat. It seemed he'd finally found an effective way to shut him up as Reynard clutched his throat and struggled to get another taunt out. And remember how to breathe.

"Hey, I didn't ask for the intensive massage!" the bison yelled, feeling the furious fox feet on his back.

Reynard responded with a swift cane smack to the rear. The bison roared and rolled onto his back to shake them off. Having seen it coming, Reynard was quick enough to hop off in time, but Nick was not. The younger fox grunted and tried to shove the ungulate off of him. "Bye, son!" Reynard coughed, still massaging his wounded throat as he made a break for the elevator.

Nick finally squeezed himself out from under the annoyed mammal and rushed for the open doors, determined not to let them close on him this time. Reynard stopped abruptly and sidestepped, extending his leg and tripping him into the elevator. He reached in after him and pushed the button for Floor 3. "Enjoy the Gazelle concert! I hear you can relate to her music now." Nick tried to get back out again, but the world's fastest closing elevator doors thwarted him.

With a belligerent sigh, he slammed on the button for Floor 9. He knew Reynard wouldn't shake him that easily, but this had better not turn into a full tour of the hotel or he'd be needing some relaxation after all.

* * *

_New Mexicow_

_4: 40 PM_

"Mmmm...ooooooh...mmmm..."

" _Lucy in the sky with diamonds! Lucy in the-"_

Lucy scowled as her phone went off, literally dropping what she was doing as she reached into her jumpsuit to answer it. "Simon's right, you really  _do_ always call at mealtime! What do you want?"

" _Just checking in, Queenie. I'm getting a bit held up over here with the boy coming to visit and all, so I wanted to make sure you're still holding up."_

"Aside from being a vampire bat stuck out in the blazing sun, I guess I'm fine." At least the awning she was currently perched under provided some much-needed shade. "What's with you? You sound kinda raspy."

" _Probably because my son just throat-punched me. So, you know, family reunion could've gone better. But I'm having a blast over here, so don't you worry about me."_

"Because I was  _so_ worried about you," she muttered sarcastically. "Anyway, I'm still watching the place like you wanted, but are you sure he's even gonna show up?"

" _Tsk tsk, oh, Queenie. Haven't you learned who you're talking to by now?"_

"More than I want to. Fine, but you better be right! I've been taking in fluids all day long just so I don't shrivel up out here!"

" _Relax, will ya? Sun's going down soon and then the fun will_  really  _begin! So get yourself as juiced up as you need."_

Lucy bit her lip, dreading the answer to her next question. "Speaking of which...I don't really have to wear  _that_ , right?"

" _Aw, come on! I worked hard on that design! Do it for me?"_

"No."

" _Do it for double the pay?"_

"...Alright. As long as it doesn't end up on ZooTube like the punch bowl incident."

" _Whatever. I'll still have it on recording regardless. Now go out there and make me proud!"_ He hung up abruptly.

"What, does he think he's  _my_ dad now?" she muttered, quickly disregarding the entire conversation. The Count was certainly one of her less likable employers, but at least he kept things interesting.

A weak moan touched her ears, reminding her of the small rat currently struggling to crawl away. "Oh no, I'm not done with  _you_ yet," Lucy purred, grabbing the exsanguinated rodent's tail with her clawed foot and pulling him back in. "Now where were we?"

"Para! Por favor!"

"Cuuuuuuuute!" With a flash of her pointed fangs, she finished her meal.

* * *

_Rodentriguez Residence_

_4: 52 PM_

Jimmy Frost was quickly learning the true meaning of the word "fiesta". The feast had yet to end, despite the fact that most of the rats had collapsed from exhaustion and were now laying all around the house, and on top of him. The fox had been effectively pinned down by sleeping rodents, but he didn't mind. He couldn't believe how at home he felt here, especially since  _he_  at least was raised by ordinary arctic fox parents.

"Need anything else to eat, Señor Frost?" Elizabeth offered.

He managed to turn his head. "No thank you...no gracias? I can't eat another bite." Which was pretty impressive coming off a meal prepared for rodents. Elizabeth sure knew how to cook.

The matriarch smiled and headed back into the kitchen to begin the long process of cleaning up. The fox yawned and slowly closed his eyes. Maybe he could do for a nap as well.

_"Oh, the weather outside is frightful! But the fire is so delightful!"_

His phone had other ideas. Jimmy shot up reflexively, spilling a half-dozen rats to the floor. "Lo siento," he whispered, a phrase he was now familiar with due to its repeated usage around Elizabeth.

The damage already done, he figured he might as well answer the phone. "Judy? There you are! Carla and I have been waiting to hear back from you all day! Did you find Nick?"

The rabbit could talk even faster than she ran, Jimmy just barely able to keep up as she rattled off everything she'd learned since leaving the precinct. "Oh, that's bad. But that's good. That's even better! Now it's bad again. Oh geez, that's _really_  bad! Yeah, I'll let Carla know. Good luck."

He hung up, needing a moment to compose himself. His head was swimming with everything he'd just heard, but he could sum it up easily: Nick was in some pretty deep doo doo. He was grateful to have ordinary parents right about now. No wonder Nick had been acting so strangely this morning. Despite the onslaught of bad news he'd just heard, that knowledge brought a smile to his face.  _So he_ did  _have a good reason to lie! I knew I shouldn't have doubted him! Carla's probably still gonna hate him though..._

He glanced around the room. Speaking of which, where  _was_  Carla? She needed to know about this ASAP. Stuffing Wallace back into his pocket, Jimmy slowly stood up, creeping out of the dining area while taking care not to accidentally step on any sleeping rats before making his way upstairs. Well, upramp actually, since rodents didn't care for stairs, but at least he didn't have to squeeze himself through a tube. He wasn't sure how much Carla would appreciate him coming up to her old room, but he had no choice.

It wasn't hard to find at least; he just had to look for the door that was way bigger than the others, which also happened to have her police badge hanging from it for whatever reason. He knocked lightly. "Hey, Carla? Just got a call from Judy. Some big stuff you should probably know about. Carla?" He knocked again. Still no response. Bracing himself to possibly get the snot beaten out of him for trespassing, he pushed open the door.

The hyena's room was mostly as expected. Dumbbells on the floor, luchador merchandise lining the walls, a worn-out punching bag in the corner, and a fine layer of dust from how long all of this had gone unused. Carla herself was sitting on her old bed, Priscilla perched on her shoulder, as she thumbed through a large book. It must've been a good one, since neither of them gave any indication that they were aware of his presence. Knowing he was playing with fire here, he slowly crept up onto the bed with them and looked over her other shoulder, curious what could make  _them_  of all mammals so enraptured they didn't even notice him.

It was a photo album, and an unexpected peek into Carla's life with the Rodentriguez family. Not able to get baby pictures, they started with her as an adolescent pup, playing around the house with her many undersized siblings. Elizabeth appeared in many of them, showing just how much she appreciated their roughhousing.

Next came Carla's teen years, angsty goth phase included. She had grown significantly and family photos now required her to either sit down or carry all of her siblings. Surprisingly, it seemed she often chose the latter. He wondered if this was for sentimental reasons or just another form of exercise.

And then her adult life. Much of it was filled with Lucha Libre photos, Jimmy's eyes nearly bulging out of his skull when he saw the kind of outfits she and Priscilla used to wear, though he had to admit they looked cute together. There were even wedding photos of their big day. He smiled to himself as Carla paused on one specific picture. She was in a tux (naturally) with Priscilla in the palm of her paw, both closing their eyes as they attempted a kiss as best they could.

He couldn't take it anymore. "D'awwwwwwwwwww-wck!"

Carla's paw wrapped around his throat in a heartbeat, and his were pretty fast right now. "What are you doing in here?!" she hissed.

"Urk! S-Sorry. Judy just called. Important stuff. Please let me keep my head."

"Let him go, mi corazon," Priscilla advised. "Like you said, he's just dumb."

Carla begrudgingly released him, letting the fox catch his breath. "You...must have been...really distracted...by those photos."

She slammed the album shut. "Tell me what Judy said, and make it fast."

Jimmy nodded eagerly, taking one more deep breath before opening his mouth.

"SoJudytoldmethatshetriedtofindNickathishousebuthewasn'tthereandheleftthisnoteabouthowhisdadisactuallytheCountandIwaslikeohmygodandthenNick'shousegotburneddownbutshewasn'tactuallyinitatthetimesothenshewenttofindNick'smomandfoundoutabouttheirmarriageissuesandstuffbutthenshegotshotbythatbigscarywolfguyandnowshe'sheadingtothehospitalandJudy'sfreakingoutandI'mfreakingoutandwehavetodosomething!"

The fox gasped for air, even more winded than before. Carla and Priscilla just stared at him, wondering how he didn't explode. "Que?"

"Nick...is in...deep doo doo."

"Oh." Any interest Carla had before was now gone. "You call that news?"

"Look, it's bad okay?" Jimmy insisted. "We need to get out of here and-"

"No."

He froze, stunned. "Say what?"

"I say no!" she repeated. "I'm finally home with my family again after all this time and I'm not leaving them to go chasing after that imundo mala vido!"

"Carla!" Priscilla gasped.

"He's not a-wait, what does that mean?"

"Filthy lowlife."

"He's not a filthy lowlife! Sure, he used to be a sorta bad guy, but he's not anymore! After all you've seen him do, how can you still hate him like this?"

 _"Why can't yoooooou be friends?"_  Wallace pleaded.

Carla scowled, firmly turning her back on the fox. "None of your business. Don't you have a crooked cop to go rescue? Sorry, I meant _ex_ -cop."

"Yes, I do!" he answered. "I mean...I don't? Whatever, I'm going back out there, with or without you!" He stormed out of the room, making a feeble attempt at slamming the door behind him.

Carla shook her head. "Wouldn't have spent all that effort telling him to mammal up if I knew he was going to waste it on him. Can we get back to the book now?"

Priscilla put a paw on her cheek. "Carla...are you sure about…?"

"Please?" she asked, her tone of voice practically begging her to drop it and move on. The rat could see a distinct wetness in the corners of her eyes. This was not the time to push her, but she hoped that time would come soon.

"Alright."

* * *

_Grand Palms Hotel_

_Floor 9 - Mrs. Pong's Noodles_

_5: 03 PM_

No one knew the full story of how a Pandese restaurant ended up in the Palms. That was a tale lost to the ages as the owner would simply say that she came here from "the old country" and leave it at that. She had gone all out in making it resemble the old country as well, oriental designs and a large amount of bamboo furniture decorating the place. Despite its foreign atmosphere, the restaurant was always packed, though the usual clientele were mostly pigs and bunnies for whatever reason.

"Sir, I'm going to need you to either order something or leave," said a somewhat furious tigress waitress.

"But I'm just getting to the good part!" Reynard insisted, his legs propped up on the table as he regaled her with another of his "hilarious" stories.

 _"I'll_ have something." Nick kicked open the door as dramatically as he could. "One dirtbag crime lord to go please."

"Hey, you've finally caught up!" he grinned, waving his son over. "Come on, let's have a bite to eat before we play some more."

"I'm not hungry." Nick pointed a clawed finger at him. "And the only thing I'm taking out tonight is  _you._ "

"...Are you coming onto me? Because I'm flattered, but-"

He was nailed in the face with a bowl of soup. Nick shot a quick apology to the rabbit he'd swiped it from.

Reynard let the bowl slowly fall off, leaving his face covered in broth and a stray noodle that he quickly slurped up. "Excuse me, Miss...do you have  _Kung Fu Fighting_ on your jukebox?"

The tigress sighed, sulking off to turn it on. "Not again…"

Reynard slowly got out of his seat, leaving his cane behind. He hopped from foot to foot, making faux martial arts poses and noises.

Nick tried very hard not to crack a smile. Maybe it was some kind of fox instinct, or the fact that it had been so long since he had seen his father, a mammal he once admired and respected more than anyone else, that a part of him wanted nothing more than to just chill out and have some actual fun with the guy again. He was still going to kick his ass and haul him off to jail, but that didn't mean he had to be all angsty about it, right?

Oh, to heck with it. He did the same thing.

They stayed like that for some time, just waiting for their cue.

" _Everybody was kung fu fighting!"_

"Ooooooooooooooooh!"

"Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!"

The two foxes stepped forward, launching a flurry of lighting-fast punches and kicks that could shatter bricks. Or so they liked to think anyway. In actuality, they were just beating the tar out of each other, but in a much sillier fashion. The other customers certainly didn't care, cheering them on excitedly.

"You have brought dishonor to the House of Wilde," Reynard said dramatically, blocking a chop from Nick. "I must avenge our sly ancestors." He snatched up a pair of chopsticks from a bowl and jabbed them into his nostrils.

Nick yelped and hopped back, yanking them out with one paw and leaning on a table with the other, hoping no one would be using those utensils anytime soon. "No, it is you who will face defeat today, one who is crazy like fox." Reynard dove behind his table to dodge a flying bowl of egg soup made to compliment the noodles still coating his face.

Reaching one paw up, he retrieved his cane and stepped back out into the fray. Twirling it like a bo staff, he swatted aside a half-dozen pot stickers that Nick had thrown like shurikens. "No no no, not the suit!" He swung his cane into a plate of dumplings, sending all of them flying back at Nick. Using an overturned tray as a shield, he avoided getting any of it on his face at least, then quickly returned fire. The disturbingly eager customers not only didn't mind their food being stolen, they outright passed it to each side to continue fueling the kung food fight.

"What is going on out there?!" an angry voice boomed from the kitchen. All the action stopped abruptly, the food-covered foxes and their audience staring up at the large form of an old female panda, dressed in an apron and armed with a wok.

"Mrs. Pong, they're kung fu fighting!" a rabbit answered excitedly.

"Not again," she groaned, focusing her wrath on the Wildes. "Is this true?!"

Reynard cleared his throat. "Well, madam, and I must add that you are looking  _fine_ , technically we did cause a bit of a ruckus. But it's really all about what your customers want in the end, right? And I have to say, they seem pretty-"

He took a wok to the face, so hard that his face was actually imprinted into it. Before he could regain his senses, Mrs. Pong lifted both of them off the ground and tossed them firmly into the opposite wall. Father and son shared a look that clearly conveyed the same sentiment: Run.

As Mrs. Pong roared and charged at them, they quickly got their tails out of the restaurant, past all the cheering bunnies and piggies that they couldn't help but share a few hi-fours with, and into the elevator.

Nick slammed the close door button while Reynard tapped the '8' with his cane, then they both leaned back against the wall and spent a few moments catching their breath.

* * *

_Happytown_

_5: 11 PM_

Judy sat out there on the cold steps for what felt like hours once the district's understaffed ZPD was done taking her statements. Happytown's effects on her had faded, her own anxiety far more powerful than anything it could cause. She tried to block it all out, but it was hard to ignore the flashing lights of the ambulance, or the squeaky wheels on the gurney that was transporting Marian Wilde towards it.

The old vixen was surrounded by paramedics, doing everything they could to staunch the blood loss and keep pressure on her chest, with a respirator placed over her muzzle to keep breath in her lungs. She was still alive, that much was clear, but for how long? She didn't want to ask.

"Excuse me," a paramedic said, oblivious to her desires as he came over. He was also a lupine, an unhelpful reminder she didn't need, as specist as that might have been. "You are the officer who called this in, right?" Probably for the best he didn't recognize her either. "It's too early yet to tell anything for sure, but we can give you an update if you want to hear it."

Given the choice, she honestly wasn't sure she did, but it was against her nature to stay ignorant. "Yes. I do."

He nodded, his expression already making Judy regret her decision. He crouched down to reach her level. "I'm going to be frank, it's not looking good. The bullet pierced a lung, the shock sending her into a comatose state. If you hadn't kept air in her for as long as you did, she would likely be dead already, but...I'm afraid her chances of waking up again are slim, even if we can repair the damage."

His bedside manner could use some work.

"I'm sorry," he said softly. "If you would like to come with her, you can."

Of course she did. Where else was she going to go now? Judy stood up numbly, just putting one foot in front of the other as she made her way into the ambulance. The paramedic hopped in behind her, closing the doors and blocking the grim scene. She could almost thank him for that much. In just a few seconds, that felt like minutes, the ambulance took off. It was a relief to finally be leaving this place, but now she was stuck in here...with Marian. She couldn't ignore this now. Taking a deep breath, she forced herself to look at the comatose fox.

All at once, the reality of the situation sank in. Her partner was gone, and may never be her partner again even if she found him. His mother could very well die and he probably had no idea, and his father was a ruthless criminal she had no idea how to stop. Maybe this wasn't going to decimate the city like the Night Howler Incident had, but on a personal level, it was even more devastating.

And if  _she_  was this torn up over it, then how was Nick ever going to take it? The poor guy must be a wreck already having to face his dad.

* * *

_Grand Palms Hotel_

_Floor 8 - Elevator_

_5:16 PM_

Nick and Reynard kept their eyes trained on each other as the elevator moved down to the next floor. Pulling himself together, Nick shook off the Mrs. Pong's ordeal and the brief moment of nostalgia it provided, ready to finish this as soon as those doors opened.

And as soon as they did, what seemed like an entire herd of antelope filed into the elevator, effectively trapping them both. Seemingly oblivious to the odd mammals out, they pressed the button to go one more floor down and the doors closed again. Herding mammals were never known for being courteous of others.

"Guess we're skipping Floor 8," Nick said, trying to untangle himself from the sea of limbs and antlers.

"It was a stupid floor anyway." Reynard shrugged as best he could. "At least we got a chance to clear the heir."

Nick glanced over at him, one look at that stupid grin telling him that, yes, he had heard that right. "Yeah. Too bad I wasn't tailor-made for this after all."

"Actually, I think it's been a rousing successor."

"Then I guess your failure isn't becoming a parent."

"No worries, I've still got an offspring in my step."

"And he's gonna smack you where the son don't shine."

"...Are you  _sure_ you're not coming on to me?"

"Positive."

"I may have fathered this plot, but you're just being a child."

"I could have conceived a better plan, I admit."

"It's given birth to a total disaster, Nicholas."

"But I can still give it new life."

"Or maybe you should have aborted this while you had the chance."

"Whoa!"

"Too far?"

"A bit."

"Sorry, but I don't give even a little fox about that."

And so the Wildes continued their duel in the only means available. Their captive audience groaned loudly with each new pun, wondering just how long this elevator was.

* * *

_New Mexicow_

_Rodentriguez Residence_

_5: 21 PM_

Elizabeth furrowed her brow in worry, rapidly counting the numerous rats slumbering around her. Only through her honed mothering instincts did she know that some were missing. "Tomas? Pedro? Maria? Where  _are_ you? I swear, they had better not be off drinking again, or so help me…" Her attention was drawn briefly away as a certain arctic fox lumbered past her, heading for the door. "Señor Frost? Where are you going?"

He winced, for some reason thinking he could slip out without anyone noticing. "Something came up. I need to go help Nick."

"But do you even know where he is?" the matriarch asked, concerned. It was hard not to see the vulpine as just a much larger child, and she didn't let any of her children wander out after dark.

Sighing, he opened the door and looked back at her. "Not exactly, but I know his evil fox dad is after Sanchez, and Sanchez is somewhere here in Sahara Square. So if I find Sanchez, I find evil fox dad, and I find Nick."

"What an amusing coincidence. It appears we are looking for the same fox, amigo." Jimmy knew then that this wasn't going to be easy as Sandcat Sanchez was suddenly standing right outside the door. "May I come inside?"

Elizabeth glowered at him, but reluctantly nodded. Letting a cat into a den of rats was never a cause for security. At least most of them were asleep already. Jimmy moved to the side and let Sanchez into the residence, smelling that pungent cologne instantly. El Orgullo attempted to come in behind him, but couldn't quite squeeze himself through the door. "You can stay there," Sanchez told him. "This should only take uno momento." The lion nodded and squatted down in front of the door, which also happened to block off anyone from trying to escape. "So...you know why I am here, si?"

"I have a few ideas…" Jimmy muttered.

"Then perhaps I must sing for you a song of reminding." Whipping out his violin, he ignored Elizabeth's frantic attempts to stop him and began to sing.

" _I know it haaaaaaas, been quite some tiiiiiiiiiiime!"_

" _But now I muuuuuust, sing you this rhymeeeee!"_

" _I am prepaaaaaaared, all things in plaaaaaace!"_

" _For the two of yooooooou, to guard my spaaaaaaace!"_

A chorus of wailing served as the coda to his song, as he had managed to wake up everyone in the house, if not the entire neighborhood. The Rodentriguez family only screamed louder when they saw the two felines at the front door, scurrying back to their rooms in a scampering stampede. "That should only take a few years of therapy," Elizabeth sighed. "So you finally want to bring in your new bodyguards, Sanchez? Having trouble in El Paraíso?"

"Nothing my boys cannot handle. Just going on a fox hunt, as it were."

"So you  _do_ know where Nick is?" Jimmy pressed.

"And his father. They're both at the hotel, making a complete mess of the place I might add."

"Sounds good to me." He smiled. "So when can we go?"

"We're not going anywhere." Carla stomped into the now-empty dining area, heading straight for Sanchez. Priscilla was still riding on her shoulder, equally pissed. "Do you have any idea how long it's been since I've gotten to be with mi familia?" she snarled at him. "I'm not giving that up just to be your little slave again!"

"And whose fault was that, Carla?" he asked tauntingly. " _I'm_ not the one who said you had to exile yourself from your family. That was your own decision."

Priscilla glanced at her briefly, uncertain, but was quirk to direct her ire back on Sanchez. "I'll get her reasons out of her eventually. But not before getting  _you_ out of  _here!"_

"So you intend to turn your back on me, after all the good times we've shared together?" Sanchez looked down, almost sadly. "In that case, I must sing for you a song of-"

Carla snatched the violin out of his paws before he could so much as play a note, breaking the instrument over her knee in one swift motion. "The only song I need to hear is your swan song."

Sanchez looked like he had just lost his mother. Even El Orgullo raised an eyebrow in surprise. "Mi...mi violin…"

"Would you like to borrow one from my siblings? That should help accentuate the mood."

"Carla…" Sanchez kept his head lowered, eyes hidden by his sombrero. "I believe you know the consequences of crossing me..."

Priscilla looked away, arms moving down to her chair. It was a subtle movement, but not subtle enough to escape her mate. "I do. And that's why I'm going to put an end to it."

The rat was quick to turn back to her. "Wait, what are you…?"

Carla glared straight at El Orgullo, still watching all of this from the doorway. "How about it, you big cabron? You and me, in the ring,  _tonight."_

Jimmy gawked. "Say whaaaaaaaaat?"

"Now hold on, Carla!" Elizabeth cut in, commanding attention despite the vast size difference. "This is not what you joined the ZPD for! Even if you win, you can't catch Sanchez this way! All you'll be doing is getting yourself in even more trouble!"

Priscilla stroked the hyena's cheek lovingly. "She's right, mi corazon. You don't need to do this for me."

To her surprise, Carla paid her no heed, her cold stare resolute and unwavering. Something was seriously wrong here. Derelict of duty was one thing, but disregarding her and her family was unheard of. "Maybe not, but I  _want_ to. For you, and for the glory of Luche Libre, I am going to take El Orgullo down!"

"An interesting proposal, and no skin off my teeth of course." Sanchez smiled back. "Well? Do you accept her challenge, El Orgullo?"

The lion slowly formed a wide, fanged grin.

Jimmy covered his face with both paws, letting Wallace droop at his side. " _Ay, carumba!"_

* * *

_Grand Palms Hotel_

_Floor 7 - Oasis Casino_

_5: 21 PM_

By the time the elevator doors opened again, the antelope were all too eager to escape. Nick too was getting sick of all these distractions, even if another side of him was enjoying it more than he'd like to admit. The sooner he got his dad under wraps, the sooner he could sort out all these conflicting emotions.

But as soon as they emerged, they came face to face with a very strange mammal. Dressed in a matador's uniform and billowing red cape, the bull was glaring pointedly at both of them. He wasn't the only one either, as he was surrounded by a whole team of coyotes, wild dogs, various felines, and other desert mammals, all dressed in surprisingly-intimidating mariachi uniforms. Backing up this group were armored ZPD officers from Precinct 2, and yet  _they_ were the ones who looked out of place here. All of the regular patrons had wisely been escorted out. "That's quite enough out of you two," the bull bellowed. "Just who do you think you are?"

Reynard managed to look smug and confident despite being covered in water, bruises, and foodstuffs. He jabbed a thumb at himself. "In your own language, I'm loco como un zorro."

"He asked  _who_ , not  _what,"_ Nick grumbled, sorely wishing that the old "enemy mine" adage didn't apply here. The opportunity to apprehend his father was now sadly overshadowed by the very real chance of getting shot in the attempt.

"Same difference. And who might  _you_ be, aside from ironic?"

"This is Gomez, my head of security," said Sandcat Sanchez, stroking a whisker as he emerged from the crowd. "And he's told me you boys have caused quite the ruckus here."

"That's right, Jefe," Gomez snorted. "Damaged property, food fights,  _puns!_ They must be stopped."

"And indeed they shall be. But first, I must sing for them a song of hopelessness." Sanchez prepped his violin while Gomez pulled out a pair of maracas to join him.

" _A pair of fooooooooxes, you've crossed the liiiiiiiiiiiine!"_

" _You tried to ruuuuuuuuuun, but now you're miiiiiiiiiine!"_

" _And in the ennnnnnnnnd, you had no chaaaaaaaance!"_

" _Cornered nooooooooow, it's your final daaaaaaaaaaaaance!"_

He bowed as his minions cheered uproariously, the ZPD offering their best golf claps. "Oh, you are so kind! How marvelous it is to perform for you today."

Reynard laughed, completely ignoring the multitude of tranq guns and other weapons aimed at him. "Okay, you know he's not that special, right?" He got reactions akin to committing blasphemy. "Seriously,  _anyone_  can do that."

"Disparates!" Sanchez snapped. "My musical talent is unique and unparalleled!"

Reynard casually popped the headpiece off his cane, revealing a small microphone, and put it to his lips while tapping his foot.

" _Five, six, seven, eight, let me set the story straight!"_

" _You make a good show, but it's already too late!"_

" _If you corner a fox, you'd best be ready to fight!"_

" _With two of us here, you're in for a hell of a night!"_

Reynard's rap concluded, he held the makeshift mic out in front of him, and dropped it. Nick found himself unable to contain an amused smirk while Sanchez just scoffed. "Feh! You call that  _music?"_

Doors slammed open all around them as around three dozen suited mammals burst into the room, now surrounding the group that surrounded them. Sanchez and Gomez went from smug to scowling. Reynard twisted the headpiece back on the cane, seemingly oblivious. "Actually, I call it stalling. Good work, King! Now do us a favor and cash these chips!"

"With pleasure." He immediately punched out the nearest of Sanchez's thugs. This brought the room to chaos in a matter of seconds as the two crime gangs waged war on each other. Sandwiched in the middle, the ZPD was hopelessly outmatched trying to quell them all. The sound of shots and musical chords filled the casino.

In spite of this, Reynard calmly placed his arm around Nick's shoulder. "I believe this nicely demonstrates the difference between our kind and theirs. A few too many mooks and the boys in blue become the boys in black and blue. And you want to be  _associated_ with these mammals?"

Screw the adage. He  _liked_  those mammals. Reynard just barely dodged Nick's attempt to slug him. "Better than being the guy just sitting back and watching!"

"On the contrary, Nicholas, one's level of success is inversely proportional to how much work you have to do yourself. But just for you, I'll play a little longer…" He clicked his tongue and proceeded to run directly  _towards_ the fierce melee now engulfing the Oasis.

Nick had no choice but to follow. "You  _are_ crazy!"

Reynard actually spun around and ran backwards, as if to make that point even clearer. "Are you feeling lucky, Nicholas? Hit me! If you can." He effortlessly ducked a warthog's arm that swung at him and disappeared into the crowd.

"That escalated quickly" did not even  _begin_ to describe what just happened. Nick mentally kicked himself, knowing that if he had just ended this sooner, maybe he wouldn't have to deal with the hail of limbs, blunt objects, and tranquilizers that flew all around him. He shoved aside a suited wombat, immediately having to dodge a New Mexicown feline and his flute-shaped baton, then using said cat as a shield to block a salvo of darts. This wasn't his first time getting involved in a skirmish with the police, though it had been a long time since he was on this end of it. Not the kind of memories he wanted to relive.

 _Then what_  do _you want, Nicholas? Isn't this whole thing about you chasing your memory of me?_

_I don't want anything to do with you anymore._

_You've got a funny way of showing it._

"Think fast!"

And this time he did. Nick whirled around and caught Reynard's cane before it could hit him. "You know, if you're trying to be a better father, you can start by not caning me." He gripped the weapon tightly and yanked it towards him, kicking Reynard in the gut and letting him fall back into a slot machine. The already-spinning wheels stopped on triple 7's, sounding a chime and spilling a deluge of coins onto his head.

A pair of beefy arms wrapped around Nick from behind, lifting him off the ground and squeezing him tightly. "That is far enough, Wilde," a ZPD rhino growled from behind him. "I don't know what's gotten into you, but both you and your Dad can answer that down at the station."

"...Would you believe me if I said I have a perfectly good explanation for this?"

"You better."

Reynard flipped a coin into the air. "Heads!" As it came back down, he flicked it right between the rhino's eyes, making him shout and drop Nick. Reynard didn't stick around for a thank you and took off again.

_That sure makes things awkward, huh?_

_Shut up, Dad._

Nick leapt out of the way as the rhino charged him, but his short flight was cushioned as he crashed into another mammal. One who turned and snarled at him, brandishing sharp claws. "Hey, watch it will…" The suited wolverine took one look at him and paled, backing away. "S-Sorry about that! Totally my fault! Please don't tell your dad!"

"Uh...I won't," Nick reassured him, too weirded out to even consider it.

_Yeah, wouldn't want anyone to question your loyalties or something._

A soft thunk was all the warning he got, rolling away from a very unfortunate mariachi bear who had just been tranqed. The ZPD was stepping up their game and Nick had to swerve back and forth as several more mammals fell around him, grateful for his relative shortness. He reminded himself not to pick on Judy for that anymore.

"Nicholas, catch!" Nick leapt up and snatched Reynard's cane out of the air as it flew at him. The fox himself was standing on a poker table, one of Sanchez's jaguars grabbing his caning arm and a ZPD hedgehog trying to pull him down by the leg. "Now listen closely, I need you to point the mouth at them and pull on the right ear!"

_Oh, this is precious! You gonna save Papa Reynard now?_

_That cat might kill you…_

_Yeah, but let's be honest, I'm kinda asking for it._

"Son, I know this is shocking and all, but it would be really nice of you to royally flush these guys now!" His mind wasn't made up fast enough to stop his body from acting. He aimed the cane's mouth at them, grabbed the right ear, and yanked it hard.

A plume of fire shot out, engulfing both attackers and sending them rolling on the floor. Reynard leapt away in surprise. "Whoops, I meant the left ear! I was going for itching powder!"

Nick just stood there, horrified at his own actions, dropping the cane.

Reynard hopped over and picked it back up again. "Relax, they're fine." They certainly didn't  _look_ fine, but at least they were alive. "As much as I'd like to give you a pep talk right now, we've got bigger problems."

A giant shadow loomed over them. "You've gone far enough, muchachos," Gomez huffed, grinding one hoof against the floor.

Reynard shot a quick glance towards Koslov, who was otherwise occupied tossing aside officers and criminal band members left and right. That option shot, he pressed his back up against Nick's, brandishing his cane. "Let's show this punk how the Wildes cut a deck." Nick wasn't exactly enthusiastic.

_You go on and on about how much you've changed, yet here you are, siding with criminals and resisting arrest. Perhaps the new you isn't all it's cracked up to be._

Nick dodged Gomez's first swing, the second deflected by a cane strike. Before he could go for third time's a charm, Nick punched him in the gut.

_Perhaps you need to stay out of my business._

Reynard twirled his cane around and brought the headpiece up into Gomez's crotch. The sturdy bovine was only stunned for a second, rearing back to headbutt the fox when Nick pulled him out of the way, causing him to trip.

 _Perhaps you need to figure out what your business_ is.

Nick felt a nudge in his side and saw the cane sticking out next to him invitingly. He hesitated for just a second and grabbed onto it, whisked off the floor as Reynard flung him onto the bull's back, swiping his cape for himself.

_Perhaps you need to shut up and let me!_

Gomez got up on all fours, Nick his unfortunate passenger. He grabbed the bull by the horns as he attempted to buck him off. Reynard fluttered the cape out next to him, waving it tauntingly as Gomez finally took notice of him. He promptly forgot all about Nick and charged, the younger fox steering him on course until Reynard pulled the cape away, jumping off and letting him crash head first into a pachinko machine.

_Perhaps you need to make up your mind!_

Reynard jabbed him the butt with his cane, delivering a shock not unlike a cattle prod. Gomez roared in fury and pulled him back up, eyeing the two foxes murderously.

_Says the figment of my imagination!_

Nick and Reynard smirked at each other, moving perfectly in sync to dodge to each side as the bull brought both fists down on them. In one swift motion, they both reared their fists back and struck him with simultaneous uppercuts to the chin. With a low grunt, Gomez collapsed onto his back and this time did not get up again.

_And whose fault is that?!_

Reynard panted, wiping a bead of sweat from his brow. "Is it just me...or do we make a  _really_ awesome team?" Nick tackled him backwards, sending them both onto a giant roulette wheel positioned square at the center of the casino. "Okay, just me then."

Nick pinned him to the wooden surface and snarled in his face. "What do you  _want?!"_

"I want you to take over my hive of scum and villainy, I want you to embrace your Wilde side, I want you to stop being such a dang killjoy..." He jabbed the cane lightly into Nick's ribs and sent another surge of electricity into him, just enough to stun him while he raised a leg and kicked his son into the edge of the wheel. "But in lieu of all that, I at least want you to put up a good fight."

Nick groaned, slowly getting back to his feet as the shock wore off. The unsteady surface of the roulette wheel wasn't helping.

 _At least_ one _of us can answer that question._

_I really don't need both of you right now._

_If you didn't need me, I wouldn't be here._

_Dad, I-_

_I'm not your dad! Not anymore! And no matter how much you want to pretend that you can both arrest me and play around with me like the good ol' days, you can't! It's time to choose! One way or the other!_

Reynard cracked his neck from side to side as he stared him down, raising his fists. "Two of a kind and playing for keeps. Shame your mother couldn't be here, or we'd have a full house." Nick glared at him silently. "What, too cool for puns now?"

Reynard's own voice interrupted them, and not the one in Nick's head. " _What does the fox say? Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing! Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing! Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing!"_

He glanced down awkwardly, eyes traveling quickly between his son and his pocket. "Uh...you mind if I…?"

"No no, go right ahead," Nick replied. "You've already been putting work before your family."

" _Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing! Pick up the phone, me! Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing!"_

"That's it, when I'm done, we're going to have a looooooong talk about these behavioral issues." Reynard plucked the phone out of his pocket and answered it. "Hey there, Ace. Great to hear from you, but I'm trying to bond with my son here, so if you could maybe call...back...later…" Any ideas Nick had of trying to sneak attack him evaporated in an instant. He was too stunned to do anything at all.

He had never seen his father frightened before.

It only lasted for a moment before that rare expression disappeared, replaced by something more subdued, and more dangerous. "I'm sorry...could you repeat that? Because for a second there, I thought you just said  _my ex-wife has been shot."_

Nick's breath stopped dead cold. Suddenly, John wasn't the parent he was worried about anymore. "Mom?"

Reynard didn't seem to register Nick anymore either. He was completely occupied by the voice on the other end of the phone and...giggling? "But that couldn't be right. After all, I  _specifically remember_ ordering you to keep her safe! Do you remember that, VanDal?" His paw shook, the phone shaking along with it. "And do you remember our deal? Good. Then how about this? Until you  _bring back that wolf's bloody head,_  the deal is off! And I mean that literally, I want it  _dripping!_ "

He hung up, still not meeting Nick's eyes as he stared down at the multi-colored platform. "Alright...so that happened. No big deal. I...I can fix this. Nothing I can't handle."

"You did this."

Reynard finally looked back at Nick, now shooting him the most hateful look he'd seen yet. "W-What? No, I-"

"I may not know what happened exactly, but I heard enough. Mom was shot by one of those wolves from the Lang Family, wasn't she? As retribution for you killing  _their_ mom." He felt himself starting to tear up, but he fought it down hard. He could cry later. Right now, he needed some retribution of his own. " _You did this!"_

"No!" Reynard protested meekly. "I would never endanger Marian!" He choked down his panic, approaching Nick with a calm, outstretched paw. "Come with me. We can fix this, together. Remember, son. No matter what happens, everything I do, I do for you."

He didn't stand a chance. Like the bull they had just taken down, Nick was only seeing red. With far more speed and aggression than he had ever shown before, he threw a swift punch into his father's face, every side of him now all for kicking his ass. The blow knocked the old tod on his back, cracking one lens of his glasses, but Nick wasn't done yet. Taking the cane into his own paws once again, he pressed it hard against Reynard's throat, eyes burning with rage and hatred. "Everything you've done has only screwed up my life even further! I was perfectly happy before you came back and you ruined it all!" He tightened his grip, only faintly acknowledging Reynard struggling beneath him. "You should have  _stayed gone!"_

"Oh, craps." Reynard winced and closed his eyes.

Nick paused, but not because of another stupid pun. As he stared down at his father, he took notice of the cracked lens, seeing his own face looking back at him from that small image. An image now greatly distorted.

"...What am I doing?" he asked quietly. "All this time, I've been trying to beat you at your own game. Only now did I finally realize something."

"What's that?"

"I don't want to play anymore." He dropped the cane and released him, standing back up again. "This isn't what Mom would want. It's not what Judy or any of my new friends would want. And you know what? It's not what I want either."

It was only then that it became apparent just how quiet it was in here. Most of the chaos had dwindled down by now and those left standing were all watching the family drama in the literal center of this conflict. The Count's suits were stunned at seeing their boss defied, the musical minions weren't sure if they were still supposed to attack, and the cops gladly took the brief pause as a chance to quietly call in backup. Nick took a cursory glance over at the assembled mammals and hopped off the wheel.

"Wait, where are you going?" Reynard asked. Desperation was another new face for him.

"I'm done doing things your way. I'm still going to stop you, but it'll be on  _my_ terms. If I want to be a cop again, it's time I start acting like one." He reached up and undid his necktie, wiping his bloodied paw on it, then throwing it back at him as if it were nothing more than a piece of trash. "Go fox yourself, Reynard."

He then immediately walked over to the nearest ZPD officer and said, "Hi, I'm Nick Wilde. You may arrest me now."

He wasn't sure  _what_  Reynard's expression was now, but he wished he could get a picture of it.

Time unfroze quickly after that. Nick's arms were pulled behind his back and cuffed, now the picture of perfect serenity. Reynard stayed where he was, the vulpine crime lord not making any attempt to go after him or avoid the incoming wave of law enforcement. He didn't move at all until the large paw of Koslov landed on his shoulder. The bear was wounded, with multiple darts sticking out of him on top of that, but he wasn't going down that easily. "What do we do now, sir?"

He slowly clenched the discarded tie and stared at his son, unable to focus on anything else. "Just get me out of here."

Nodding slowly, Koslov scooped up Reynard with one arm and swatted aside a row of cops with the other. Quickly scanning the crowd, he spied a certain feline making his own escape with Gomez. "What about Sanchez?"

"What  _about_ Sanchez?" In the entire room of scurrying mammals, his eyes never left Nick's.

Nick's eyes never left him either, but his were calm and half-lidded, just like they were supposed to be. Their mutual stare was broken only when Reynard finally tripped another smokescreen. The officers fired, but when the smoke cleared, several of their own were down, Reynard and Koslov were gone, and the casino now had a giant hole in the wall.

But Nick wasn't particularly upset. He knew that he had won this round.

_Well done, Nicholas. To be honest, I wasn't sure you had it in you._

_You can go now._

It went.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nick's inner conflict between the two sides of him has been the central premise of this story from the beginning. It morphed over time from merely being cop vs. criminal to past vs. present and ideals vs. reality, but Nick has been unbalanced in some way for our entire journey thus far.
> 
> So why on Earth is this getting resolved in the middle of the fourth arc? I admit, that wasn't always the plan, but we've always been the kind of guys to write according to what the characters want and alter the story to accommodate. And right here, Nick was telling us that he couldn't stay like this for much longer, so it was time to put this issue to bed. Which isn't to say the story will be ending prematurely or that we don't know where to take it from here. Still plenty more up our sleeves. :P
> 
> If you're wondering why the casino scene was so much longer than the others, that's also because it was originally the only setting for this battle and not just the climax of it. In fact, the original title of the chapter was going to be Casino Battle Royale. (Yeah, even by our standards, that was a little weak.)
> 
> The scene with 'Mrs. Pong's Noodles' was a giant, blatant reference to Kung Fu Panda, our other big furry love. Which is also why that scene is even wackier than anything else we've ever written. We couldn't resist. Or rather, we didn't want to.
> 
> Nick and Reynard's pun duel was heavily inspired by a similar duel between Elan and his father Tarquin in "The Order of the Stick", a fantastic webcomic that is also one of my main inspirations when it comes to my style of humor. Some of the puns are even the same, but were too perfect not to include. (Lots of mood whiplash in this chapter, eh?)
> 
> Gomez was originally going to appear in Chapter 19, but the scene was a bit too packed as it is and supposed to be focused on Reynard and Finnick, so he was a bit too hard to fit in. His name is a not-so-subtle pun off of a certain famous director. He is owned by me.
> 
> Want to know what else wasn't originally planned? The metric ton of song references that found their way into this chapter. But it is appropriate. Speaking of which, we have another question to pose to you guys, a bit similar to the last. What ringtones do you think are a good fit for each character? Feel free to include as many as you want, even for characters who already got one in this chapter. (Speaking of songs, is it bad that for the majority of the chase, I had a variation of 'We Are Number One' to the tune of 'Crazy Like a Fox' playing in my head?)
> 
> Shoutout to President Stalkeyes (again) for helping out with the restaurant and spa scenes.
> 
> Did we intentionally postpone this chapter just to release it on Father's Day? Yes, but only for a few days, so please don't kill us.


	22. Seeing Double Trouble

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, some pretty big reactions to the last chapter. Honestly not sure how we can top that kind of insanity, but we'll certainly try! The rest of this arc will be mostly Carla-centric, so prepare yourselves to be suplexed by our words! Or something. Just enjoy the lucha-ness.
> 
> A special shout out to TV Tropes user Snicka, who seems to have become Born to Be Wilde's dedicated entry pimp. Keep on troping, buddy. We greatly appreciate it. :)

****

**Chapter 22: Seeing Double Trouble**

_Grand Palms Hotel_

_Rooftop_

_5: 46 PM_

_What just happened?_

That question repeated itself over and over in Count Reynard's mind, like a broken record that he didn't have the energy to fix. Because as it turned out, he  _couldn't_ fix anything.

It had all been going so well. He had expected that Nicholas might not be receptive to joining up with him at first, even that such a meeting could end in complete chaos. So what? That chaos was the most fun he'd had in a while, finally faced with an adversary who could rival his intellect, cunning, and wordplay. Worst case scenario, or so he thought, he at least got to spend some quality time with his son again and remind him of all the fun they used to have together. Even getting the utter shit kicked out of him in the process was an expected, albeit not desirable, outcome.

But then something very  _un_ expected happened. Nicholas had changed, and not in the way he wanted, tipping the scales back towards the side of law and order. He'd walked away from him, he'd thrown his own childhood keepsake to the ground, he'd called him Reynard. Not Dad, or Father, or even John, but Reynard. Sure, he wanted everyone  _else_ to call him by that alias, but not his own freaking son!

He'd find the irony hilarious in any other circumstance.

No, he didn't expect this. He didn't have a plan for this. And now a second question began to echo in his mind.

_What the hell do I do now?_

For the first time in longer than he could remember, he was at a complete loss.

Koslov, for his part, had done an admirable job. The giant bear had carried him up several flights of stairs whilst evading police, then barricaded the door with a heavy steel beam intended for construction, all despite having more needles stuck in him than a back-alley junkie. Sure, these were tranquilizers intended to take down a fox, so they weren't going to do much to your average polar bear, let alone Koslov, but the combined dosage made even the lightweight crime lord feel more like a load of bricks. "We should be safe for time being," he said, finally stopping to catch his breath. The loud banging on the door was greatly distracting though, or was that just in his head?

"Good. You may put me down now." Coming from anyone else, the simple order would be no cause for concern. Coming from Count Reynard, the fact that it came with nary pun, quip, nor wisecrack raised a major red flag.

He might've commented on it too, until his eyes nearly fluttered shut of their own volition. After snapping them open again, he decided that it wasn't worth potentially dropping his boss, or worse, falling on him. He set the fox down gently, years of experience with much smaller mammals helping him compensate for the tranquilizers.

"There you are!" yelled Finnick, waiting for them on one of the artificial palm fronds. The fennec's suit looked hastily put on, but still better than either of theirs right now, and he was draped in one of those fancy hotel towels they always made a fuss about stealing. "Where the hell have you been?! The fuzz is swarming this place and I barely got out in time before they came beating down my door!" He paused only for a second as he scanned them both. "And what's with you two? You look like shit."

"Do not disrespect the Count," Koslov slurred, his jaw partially numb from sedation.

Finnick stepped closer and poked him hard in the kneecap."And what are  _you_  gonna do about it? In case ya haven't noticed, we're all screwed! The ZPD has us trapped up here with nowhere to go but down! What do we do, threaten to jump and hope for sympathy?!"

"I came here because the Count ordered me to. Why are  _you_ here if you are so clever?"

"The cops are blocking the way down, so I went up! Or maybe we're all just following the bad guy cliché of climbing up to the highest point when justice comes knocking! If you've got any more brilliant ideas, I'd love to hear them, Reynard!"

Reynard didn't react, too transfixed on the bloody tie in his paw, which the smaller fox quickly recognized. "Hold up, is that Nick's tie?"

"Not anymore."

"I believe the Count is going through the five stages of grief," Koslov explained. "He will be fine."

"Oh, I'll show him grief!"

Koslov had finally heard enough to willingly exert himself further. "You are very loud and very rude. I will teach noisy mutt lesson." He raised his arm to attack, only for it to fall limp at his side. Undeterred, he smacked Finnick across the muzzle with his numb arm like the King of Clubs he was purported to be, sending him rolling across the rooftop. As soon as he found some traction, Finnick snarled and lunged back, biting him in multiple places that he couldn't even feel. The bear very slowly tried to get him off, pivoting around in circles. Reynard watched all of this unfold without so much as a smirk.

But over their increasingly loud, yet decreasingly effective argument, another sound started to emerge. It was soft at first, but became much harder to ignore as it drew closer. Even the feuding mammals had to put it on hold once they saw the unmistakable form of a sleek, black helicopter descending from the night sky. "Guess that works," Finnick admitted, releasing his hold of Koslov's ears and nose as they both backed away to make room. The chopper came down right in the center of the roof and the propellers slowed to a stop.

One of the suited tigers emerged from the vehicle, adorning a helmet and earmuffs. "Sounds like I'm here just in time, boss. Let's get going before…" Even under the helmet, they could tell he was raising an eyebrow. "What happened to  _you?"_

Reynard's cane flew up and the feline flinched as it slammed into the side of the aircraft, mere inches from his head. "Next one to ask me that takes the fast way down." Saying nothing more, Reynard hopped in and took his seat.

An awkward silence passed until the pilot started up the propellers again. Koslov chuckled uneasily and nudged Finnick with his foot. "You see? Already he is past denial stage."

Suddenly not in the mood for argument anymore, Finnick ignored him and filed into the chopper. Koslov made it just far enough to reach the doors before he finally passed out, having to be dragged the rest of the way in before they shut the doors and lifted off.

* * *

_Sahara Square_

_5:48 PM_

_What just happened?_

That question repeated itself over and over in Nick's mind, like a mixtape on the fritz. At least it was stuck on a song he somewhat liked.

He wasn't entirely sure how to feel about what went down at the hotel. He wanted to be happy about finally breaking free of his father's influence, but the fact that it had taken his mother's potentially-fatal shooting to do it wasn't exactly reassuring. At the time, it had been the catalyst to finally drive him completely over the edge, to see Reynard not as his father but as the monster he had become.

And then he'd realized what kind of monster  _he_ was becoming. Committing acts of violence and hatred in the name of family was exactly what Reynard would approve of, and like him, he was acting upon his own form of justice instead of the one he was supposed to be following. So he'd decided then and there to end it, leaving justice in the paws of those who actually knew what they were doing. Which was why he now found himself sitting in the back of a police cruiser, heading away from the hotel and towards a nice, comforting set of iron bars. His only regret was that he couldn't drag Count Reynard there with him.

Or rather, his only regret aside from letting himself get hauled off before he could find out more about what happened to Mom. He'd already given one side of his family far more attention than the other and that was about to change. "Excuse me? Officer?"

The black mustang who had arrested him, and rather respectfully at that, turned back to glance at him through the barred window. "What is it? Don't tell me you're having second thoughts about turning yourself in now."

"Not at all." And Nick smiled a little when he realized he meant that. "I wanted to ask you something. Have you heard anything about the shooting of a Ms. Marian Wilde?" The smile didn't last. "It happened earlier today, in Happytown."

The horse took a second to respond, during which Nick could see a clear grimace cross his face. Happytown didn't have the best reputation out on the streets and it was even worse among the police he imagined. "I'm afraid I don't. The precincts don't share much with each other unless it's really serious. We all have our own cases to deal with."

"Yeah, I figured…" Except he left out the part about how barely anything leaked out of Happytown in general. Nick knew as much, so why did he even bother to ask?

_Because I'm finally being a good son and actually worrying about her. I'm so sorry, Mom. I'm sorry I ran away and cared more about my scumbag father than you. But most of all, I'm sorry I can't be there with you now._

All he said aloud though was, "Thanks anyway." His mask was back in place, business as usual, but this uncertainty was quickly getting to him. A large, flashy van playing mariachi music passed by on the left and he didn't even blink. It figured that as soon as one parent stopped dominating his thoughts, the other took over.

_At least I'm not hearing her voice in my head. Yet._

"So how much longer until we reach Precinct 2?" he asked, desperate for anything to change the subject.

"We're not going to Precinct 2," the officer answered. "We've been given a special request. You're to be taken to Precinct 1 to speak with IA."

Chief Buffalo Butt  _and_ Internal Affairs? Yeah, that would sure keep his mind occupied.

* * *

_5: 49 PM_

"Was that a police cruiser?" Jimmy asked nervously, seeing the other vehicle pass by on the right.

"Do not fret, amigo," Sanchez called from the front seat, only the tip of his sombrero visible. Much more noticeable was the hulking form of El Orgullo driving the van. "Have you forgotten who you are with?"

"That's...kinda  _why_  I'm fretting."

"We're not going to get pulled over," Priscilla reassured him. "I know from experience. This light show on wheels might as well be invisible to the police."

"What about Nick's bad dad? I don't think he'll have any problem seeing us."

"On the contrary," said Sanchez, raising a clawed finger, "I have it on good faith that Señor Wilde's steely gaze will be pointed elsewhere for the foreseeable future."

"Giving us all the time in the world to settle this, huh?" Priscilla muttered bitterly.

"You shouldn't be here." It was the first thing Carla said since they headed out, as if she were already competing with El Orgullo in vocal scarcity. The hyena looked pointedly at Priscilla, then Jimmy. "Neither of you. This is  _my_ grudge to settle."

The rat glared right back at her, easily matching the intensity of the larger mammal. "You think I don't have a stake in this?"

"Of course you do, and I'm going to avenge-"

"I mean  _you,_ idiota! How do you think I'm going to feel if you get yourself hurt doing this for me?! That's your problem, Carla, you always think you can handle everything on your own!"

Jimmy backed away as much as he could, shielding Wallace's eyes. Even Sanchez and El Orgullo shared an uncomfortable look as the rat's small, but loud voice was amplified in the enclosed space.

"-selfish, bull-headed things you could do! Honestly, I don't know how you ever became a cop!" Carla, who had stoically weathered the verbal assault up to this point, stiffened and let out a low growl. That one had struck, and struck  _hard._

Priscilla finally stopped herself, seeing the look on the hyena's face. "Carla...I…"

"Sanchez, pull over. My mate will be getting off here."

"Carla!"

While not one to be ordered around, Sanchez was more than a little sick of this already. He gave the signal to El Orgullo, who nodded and brought the van to a halt on the side of the road. With the flip of a switch, one of the passenger side doors opened automatically.

Priscilla struggled to respond for several seconds, rapidly flashing back and forth between sadness and anger. It was anger that stuck. "Fine. Push away everyone that wants to help you. By the sound of things, you have a lot in common with this 'Nick' of yours."

"OUT!"

She didn't even look back, straining not to let her expression show as she hopped off the seat and then out of the van, letting the door close behind her.

Jimmy slowly looked back, jumping a little when he saw Carla boring holes into him next. "Uh...I'm no relationship expert, but that seemed a little harsh…"

"You too." Carla pointed firmly at the door. "Get out."

He gulped. "I...I will not."

"Jimmy…" she growled warningly.

"No!" The fox literally put his foot down, though it just barely reached the floor. "It was you who told me to stay strong for what I believe in. I'm holding to that, Carla. I won't back down to anyone...not even  _you."_

Carla was taken aback by his sudden boldness, but she wasn't about to back down either. The two mammals leaned in closer and closer, stubborn snarls building on each side, until-

"Ay ay ay, are you quite finished yet?" Sanchez asked impatiently. "If I wanted to watch a soap opera, I would sit down for a night of 'Maria la del Burro.' I'd sing a song to express my displeasure,  _but_   _I can't now!"_ El Orgullo reached over to give him a comforting pat on the shoulder. "Gracias. Just… just drive."

As the van started moving again, Carla finally relented. "Hmph. You wanna know how I became a cop?" She moved her sharp glare to the back of Sanchez's hat. "You're about to find out."

* * *

_Construction Zone_

_6: 04 PM_

Far away from the tension in Sahara Square, and just as oblivious to anything going on there, a pack of wolves worked tirelessly. It wasn't a project they particularly enjoyed, but as trained mechanics, they found a certain thrill in a new challenge, and what the Count had asked of them was a challenge indeed. It also helped to keep their minds off of the fact that they were effectively slaves, despite getting a paycheck for it.

The Lang Family (and they refused to call themselves anything else) were stationed around a massive warehouse in an abandoned patch of land. While it had been legally bought by their new employer, there was no doubt in their minds that this project was for nefarious purposes. Well, maybe a  _little_ doubt, considering what they were expected to build. But unlike Mother, Count Reynard didn't encourage asking questions unless he wanted to boost his ego even further, so no one did. Most of the work went on inside though, leaving onlookers to only wonder what was causing such a tremendous racket.

The noise was enough to even drown out the black helicopter now setting down outside. "All of you, step outside for a minute," Reynard ordered. Finnick, the tiger pilot, and the still-unconscious Koslov were practically shoved out of the chopper while Reynard slammed the door shut again. The small fox spent the next minute or so idly poking Koslov and wondering if maybe he  _should_ have just jumped, until the crime lord emerged again, wearing a shiny new suit.

Frankly, he wasn't surprised. Reynard had clearly planned for things to get messy, even literally, so  _of course_ he had packed a spare suit in the chopper. He even had a new pair of glasses to replace the ones Nick had presumably busted. Gloomy demeanor aside, he looked good as new. Still, there was one thing off about his new wardrobe, and it took Finnick a second to figure it out.

He wasn't wearing his tie anymore. At least, it hadn't been  _his_ for a long time. "Picked up a souvenir from the hotel," he said, the closest thing to a joke the entire trip over, but there was no mirth behind it. "Stay here and watch Koslov for me. I have business to take care of."

"Uh...sure," Finnick replied, watching him walk off in that old, tacky, now blood-speckled tie. He quickly decided it wasn't a subject he should bring up if he wanted to stay on the Count's good side. Sighing, he sat himself square on top of Koslov. "Must be easy bein' large and in charge, eh big guy?"

Reynard tried to maintain his usual, casual stroll as he headed through the lot. He couldn't let these wolves sense weakness, not now. He had to remain civil, even  _if_ one of these filthy, uneducated, pit-sniffing vagrants had shot Marian. Though the constant noise and motion made it hard to pick out the filthy, uneducated, pit-sniffing vagrant he was looking for.

One of them found him first. Feeling a fierce glare on the back of his neck, Reynard stepped to the side as a loaded pick-up truck pulled up next to him, far too close to the place he was just standing. He hadn't met the wolf behind the wheel, but he knew who he was: Felix Dire Junior.

Oh yes, his self-control was going to be  _tested_ tonight.

"Howdy, Reynard," he greeted, clearly undergoing a similar test himself. And failing. "Shoot any mothers lately?"

He seriously considered making an example of him right there, but his hold on the pack was unstable already and he couldn't risk fracturing it further. Not  _yet_ anyway. "Talk to your brother lately?"

Junior's eyes widened for a second, paws wrapped tightly around the wheel. So he  _did_ know he was alive. Another point against giving Junior the same courtesy.

Luckily for him, Reynard had bigger wolves to fry. "Where is your alpha? I need to speak with him."

Junior growled, tilting his head sharply to the right. "Ain't no alpha around here, but Tony is that way."

"Thanks. Have a nice day." He walked away, muttering under his breath. "Insolent mongrel."

"Murderous bastard," Junior muttered back, driving off quickly.

Despite the vague directions, Reynard had no trouble finding the newly-elected alpha wolf. Fast Tony was fast asleep in an abandoned convertible, sneakered feet resting on the dashboard and a construction helmet, evidently just for show, draped over his eyes.

"Charming." He slammed a fist on the horn.

Tony awoke with a start, fist raised to clobber those responsible. "Why you lousy, stinkin'-" He lifted his helmet. "-wonderful, generous, forgiving Count Reynard. How was your day, sir?"

"Left much to be desired." A description also apt for the lazy mutt in front of him. He glanced back towards the warehouse. "Progress report."

"We've been working all day on it, sir." "We", meaning everyone else. "A lot of the infrastructure is built already, but even with a few dozen trained mechanics, it's still gonna be a while…" He noticed the look on Reynard's face. "B-But we did get your limo back to perfect condition."

"Hmmm...when did I give you all this project again?"

"Last night."

"Wait, really? It feels like it's been  _months."_ Passage of time was the first thing to go in old age, or so he'd heard at some indeterminate point in the past. He reached into his new suitcoat and pulled out a manilla file, one inscribed with the letters "H.B.". Taking a moment to compare and contrast, he finally nodded. "I suppose you're doing okay then. Just remember when I need this done by."

"Yeah…but why does it have to be that exact day?"

"Tony, do you remember my policy about questioning my carefully-crafted plans?"

"Don't?"

"Good boy. That's not why I'm here though. Take a look at this." He put the file away again, now bringing out a small slip of paper that he handed to the wolf. "These are the names of the most talented, ruthless, and all around kill-happy mammals currently under my employ. Find them and bring them to me."

"Er...yeah, I can do that," Tony said hesitantly, looking over the list. "Wait, you don't have VanDal on here? That guy's a total ace."

" _No, he is not._ " He turned his back on the wolf, shooting an unenthusiastic wave over his shoulder. "When you come looking for me, I'll be in the Countmobile, reflecting on...a lot of things."

Though Tony didn't see it, Reynard finally cracked a small smile. True, maybe he didn't have a plan to deal with Nicholas just yet, but a little revenge never hurt anyone.

* * *

_Savannah Central_

_Zootopia Police Department - Precinct 1_

_6: 10 PM_

There was a good reason Nick didn't want to come back here yet, and it had nothing to do with getting yelled at. No, he was more than used to anything Bogo could throw at him, and he doubted IA would fare much better at breaking him. He intended to tell nothing but the truth after all.

But even though he knew what the truth  _was_ , the rest of his co-workers didn't, and the shame he felt upon being walked into his own precinct in pawcuffs was overpowering. Anger he could live with. Disappointment was uncharted territory, and as hard as it was to see it on the faces of his fellow officers, his  _friends_ , the disappointment he felt towards himself for ever letting it get to this point was even worse. How should he even react?

"Nice to see ya, Wolford!"

"Wife still treating you well, McHorn?"

"Enjoy that hospital food, Delgato?"

Exactly as he always did. Even if he was guilty of some legally-adjacent actions, he saw no need to act like it. This was Officer Wilde's return to form, and soon enough, they were all going to see that.

Besides, he needed to stay strong just to face Chief Bogo again. The buffalo wasn't known to be a fan of cowards, but he also hated criminals, so even Nick couldn't predict how he would react to this latest escapade. Would he get fiery anger, bitter disappointment, or something even worse, complete indifference now that he'd lived up to what the chief profiled him as?

He almost seemed to get just that when Bogo stepped out into the lobby and took over for the horse without a word. The stallion nodded and shot Nick an encouraging smile before he left, but he barely noticed. "Hey, Chief."

"Wilde," he said, just as shortly. Bogo was normally so easy to read,  _comically_  easy, really, but he wasn't betraying anything today. He simply put an arm on his shoulder and led him down the hall. Nick already knew exactly where he was heading: interrogation. Normally a place where he got to be as much of a smartass as he wanted as long as it got the perp to talk, but now that  _he_ was the perp, he wasn't sure what kind of approach he should take. Smartass tended to be his default though...

"How much do you know?" It seemed like a dumb question, but Nick needed at least  _some_ idea of what he was in for.

"I know that your father is the Count, he's been trying to get you to join up with him, you both made a complete mess of the Grand Palms, and then you almost strangled him to death."

_So all the parts that sucked, got it._

"But I also know that you didn't go through with it. You turned yourself in and now here we are." Nick's ears perked up just slightly. Was that  _pride_ he just picked up? Not wanting to jinx what must have been his imagination, Nick decided to take advantage of his right to remain silent.

"I was a lot like you once." Okay, now this was getting weird. "Young, brash, temperamental, and with a natural disdain for authority. Don't deny it." He wasn't planning to. "But once I was on the force, I realized that kind of attitude wasn't going to fly. Not just for my sake, but for those in my squad. You keep looking out for yourself and mammals get hurt. It's a lesson I learned the hard way."

He really didn't want to hear the details. "And this reminds you of...me?"

He sighed. "For the longest time, I admit there's been a part of me that's always doubted you. Even after all that you and Officer Hopps have done for this city, all it took was a few flimsy pieces of evidence to turn it into full-on profiling. But I was wrong. Old habits die hard, and for that...I'm sorry."

_Is the world ending? Am I seriously bonding with Chief Buffalo Butt?_

His grip suddenly hardened, as did his voice. "Which isn't to say I  _like_ you. You're still an annoying, wisecracking, pain-in-the-arse."

 _Phew. Disaster averted._ "Awwwww, I dislike you too, buddy."

He snorted. "We're here."

"Here at the birth of a blossoming anti-friendship?"

"Here at the interrogation room." The smile Nick was growing promptly died as he found himself staring into the familiar room. It looked so much scarier from this side of the table. "I'm not allowed to observe this, so you're on your own. Try not to embarrass me too much."

"No promises."

"Oh, and Wilde?" The fox turned back to face him. "Your mother is still alive. Hopps is looking after her now."

Nick released a breath he didn't know he was holding. There were no safer paws she could possibly be in. "Thank you."

"Contrary to popular belief, I actually pay pretty close attention to my officers. Now get in there before IA starts whining to me."

Nick just nodded, and with that weight off his shoulders, he entered the room.

* * *

_Sahara Square_

_6:15 PM_

No one said anything for the rest of the ride. Jimmy thought it best to keep it that way, lest this sudden generosity vanish and he find himself evicted by force. No amount of guts would keep Carla from tossing him through the window. Or the door. Without opening it.

Not even Sanchez spoke, nor did he sing, which was as unnerving as it was relieving. Thankfully for everyone involved, it wasn't much longer before they arrived at...a completely nondescript brick wall. "Don't tell me we're  _lost_ now!" Jimmy whined.

El Orgullo lifted his large paws to the side and clapped three times in succession. Answering the signal, the wall opened in front of them like something out of a Jack Savage movie. Paying it no mind, the lion went back to driving. The van entered the tunnel and moved slowly downwards as the wall closed behind them.

The fox couldn't ignore this quite so easily. "Wait, so your underground luchador circuit is…"

"Underground, si," Sanchez answered. "Very exclusive. Except to those burrowing freeloaders from the Nocturnal District."

He said no more, as if that was all the explanation needed. Giving up, Jimmy just sat back and tried to ignore the tension in the air as he tried to figure out some kind of game plan, one that didn't involve grappling anyone into submission. Something was seriously wrong with Carla, that much was obvious, but what could  _he_ do that her own mate couldn't? After Carla had bailed him out of his funk, he owed it to her to at least try. Just as long as things didn't get any weirder.

The van came to a stop inside a large, circular room. It was home to a wrestling ring, old and dilapidated, but far from abandoned. The seats were all empty, for the moment, and the only other mammals there to greet them were a beaten-up bull in matador clothes and Sandcat Sanchez.

New as he was to the force, Jimmy's developing investigative instincts told him something was wrong with this picture. He looked at the Sanchez who had left the van with them, then the one standing next to the ring, then back at the former, then the latter, until finally, "You have an evil twin brother?!" The fox gaped at them. "Or is that the good twin? Does it even matter with crime lords, cause it seems kinda relative…"

The bull stepped forward and smacked him. "Gracias, Gomez," said both Sanchez's.

"It is not something so pedestrian," Vanchez explained. "I have enough moola to make my  _own_ twin. Observe." At his signal, El Orgullo lifted a large bucket of water and dumped it onto Ringchez.

His clothes were soaked instantly, water dripping off of him in puddles. And not just water either, but a mix of black and tan fur dye that pooled at his feet. Grunting in annoyance, he ripped off his poncho and sombrero, revealing a plain brown shirt, jeans, and a baseball cap adorned with a leaf symbol. As the last of the dye came off, he glared at them through masked eyes, a ringed tail popping out behind him. "Meet Danny, professional actor and body double."

"A pleasure," the tanuki said dryly, suddenly not sounding the least bit like Sanchez. "So you got my money or what?" Sanchez signaled to the lion again and he pulled a briefcase from under his trench coat, flipping it open for Danny to look over. "Good. I'd charge extra for making me sing like you, but it didn't take much effort."

The feline scowled. "My talent is wasted on you anyway." He snatched back the extra violin and strummed it lovingly. "Oh, mi amore. I shall never let anyone harm you again."

"Um, quick question," Jimmy said, raising his paw. " _Why_ did you have this guy pretending to be you?"

"The old fox isn't the only one with a cunning mind." Sanchez smiled. "While I was coming to the ZPD for help, I had Danny posing as me at the hotel, where I knew those crooks would be looking. They fell for it...how you say, hook, line, and stinker." He sniffed a few times, then whirled around on Danny. "You were supposed to wear my cologne too! We needed to be  _completely_ identical!"

The tanuki was busily straining water out of his tail. "Do you have any idea how hard it is to get that stuff out of your fur? I do have other clients, you know." He raised a paw before he could complain. "Relax, he doesn't know your scent, and it's not like he could smell both of us to compare. He's got bigger problems now anyway."

Gomez cleared his throat. "Speaking of which, we really shouldn't stay here. The ZPD  _and_ the Count's boys are stomping around right above us."

"Let them. We have business to settle and no one is going to stop us."

"Wait, we're literally  _under_ the hotel right now?" Jimmy asked. "Then what about Nick?"

"He's fine," the bull said through clenched teeth.

"And also not here anymore," Danny added. "The cops took him."

Jimmy groaned loudly. "Dang goalposts, just stay still!"

"On that note, I'm getting out of here," the tanuki said, waving passively as he left with his payment. "I've seen what's going on up there and I want no part of it. Sayonara."

"Well, at least we can take care of this wrestling thing, right Carla?" If it hadn't been for the twenty minutes of silent treatment, he might have noticed sooner that the hyena had vanished. "Not this again."

"I know where she's going." Sanchez smirked. "Back to her old locker room, and her old uniform. It's still there of course, just as fresh and durable as ever. I wonder if we can say the same about Carla…"

He sincerely hoped so.

* * *

_Savannah Central_

_St. Bernarde's Hospital_

_6:17 PM_

By some stroke of fate, good or bad, Marian Wilde's injury had been deemed too severe for the limited medical resources of Happytown to accommodate, which probably wouldn't mean much if not for being related to one of Zootopia's most famous duo, and having the other directly on the scene. Instead, she had been transported to the very same hospital Nick himself had stayed in after his unfortunate run-in with savage Outbackers.

It could have even been the same room, but Judy didn't care enough to check. She was too focused on just staying by the vixen's side whenever she could, even though the situation was now completely out of her paws. She just felt she owed something to Nick to stay here, no matter what, until she got some real results.

As if challenging that notion, she got a phone call just then. This would finally be what she needed to perk herself up again, but she sure didn't get that impression when she saw Cheif Bogo on her caller ID. The odds that she was about to be fired for insubordination were pretty high, but practically guaranteed if she dared ignore the call, so she forced herself to answer it anyway. "Hello?"

" _Officer Hopps."_ The chief sounded much more resigned than usual. Had something happened, or was he just putting on a facade of sympathy before he ended her career? " _Wilde is back."_

With those three words, it suddenly didn't matter. "Really?! Where is he?!"

" _Back at the station. I know you haven't been following the police channels for a while, so this may come as a shock to you. He's been arrested."_

And with those three words, she was back to being terrified. "No...that can't be right!"

" _Calm down. He turned himself in for his rogue actions. His original charges have been dropped."_ If he had really wanted to calm her down, he would have said that to begin with. Even delivering good news, the chief had found a way to get back at her.  _"How's Mrs. Wilde?"_

Judy shook off her surprise that he even knew about her quickly, looking over at the prone vixen in the bed next to her. She was hooked up to more machinery than she could identify, but still hanging on for the time being. "She's comatose, but alive," she summarized.

There was a silence very uncharacteristic of Chief Bogo. " _...I understand. That boy has been through a lot."_

"No thanks to you", she almost replied, but she didn't feel like being spiteful anymore. She just had to know what was going on. "I've already given Jimmy and Carla an update. Do you need me back at the station?"

" _Not anymore."_ Which almost sounded like a confirmation that she was fired until, " _The Sanchez mission seems to have resolved itself, though I'm still waiting on an update, namely where the heck those two officers were while all that was going on."_

"All what, sir?"

" _Too much to explain right now._ " She knew the feeling. " _Officer Wilde can tell you later, or the IA agent interrogating him now."_

"IA...?" That could get ugly, especially with Nick's mouth. She really hoped he didn't default to smartass again.

" _Don't worry, he'll be fine._ " Surprisingly, he actually sounded like he meant it. " _If he can handle me, there's nothing IA can do that will shake him."_

* * *

_Zootopia Police Department - Precinct 1_

_Interrogation Room_

_6: 16 PM_

As he entered the room, Nick wondered how long they would make him wait to meet his interrogator. Under Bogo's protocol, they usually let the perps sweat a little, softening their resolve before letting someone in to meet them.

Either the IA was supremely confident or just didn't care for Bogo's protocol because the agent was already there. She was a raccoon in a gray suit jacket and matching skirt, with a red blouse underneath. Still as a statue, her blue eyes followed Nick as he slowly sat down across from her.  _Not to be specist, but are_ all _raccoons this creepy?_ "Hi...I'm Nick Wilde, and-"

"I know who you are," the raccoon cut him off. She calmly brought out a pen and notepad, flipping through it lightly. "Karen VanDal, Internal Affairs. Now, let's get down to business."

 _And why does that name sound familiar?_ "Sure." There was something about this situation that made him very, very uncomfortable. Not knowing what IA had planned for him, or if he could get his badge back, or if he'd even make it out of this building again, or anything about this raccoon lady, okay, a  _lot_ of somethings. "Look, about the whole evidence room theft-"

"You've been cleared."

She said it so bluntly that Nick needed a second to recover. "Wait, really?"

Her gaze tightened. "Do I look like the type for jokes? Yes, the charges have been dropped. There wasn't enough evidence to make a case."

 _Thanks for mentioning_  that,  _Chief._ He could picture him laughing right now."Then...I can be a cop again?"

"Naturally." He sighed in relief. "Assuming your hearing about the incident at the Palms goes well."

The sigh hitched in his throat. "Hearing?"

"Yes, hearing. Is yours functional?" Apparently, she  _was_ the type for jokes. "You'll be meeting with a board of IA representatives, including myself, to discuss your continued role in the ZPD."

As if he didn't feel like enough of an idiot for running off after Reynard. Why oh why couldn't he just stay put? "Alright, so what do you want to know? If this is just a precursor to my hearing, that is."

Karen clicked her pen and already started to write. "We will get the full story then, but for now, I would like to hear your version of the events. There are quite a few holes we need to fill."

Okay, he could handle that. "Well, it started when I witnessed Lady Lang's murder. That's when I realized that my father was behind the Crime Lord Killings."

She stopped writing. "So you concealed valuable witness testimony. That will be sure to come up…"

He gulped. The urge to lie was strong, but he refused to do it anymore. "I mean, I just found out my dad was a murderer. Can you really blame me?"

"No, but the law can. What happened next?"

"I took a detour at my house to reflect, then came back here. After 'concealing valuable witness testimony' for a while, Chief Buf-Bogo, called me up to his office and told me about the evidence room theft. You know what came next."

"Your attention to detail is sorely lacking," she frowned, still writing nonetheless. "Let's focus on the theft for a bit. It is one of our main concerns."

He thought he was a pretty good storyteller personally. "I thought you said I was cleared."

"You are." She stared hard at the fox, still keeping that pen going. "That's not what concerns us. What we want to know is how your father arranged this in the first place."

He scoffed. "What do you mean  _how?_  The guy could talk a square peg into a round hole if he wanted to."

She pinched her brow, her patience starting to slip. "It's no easy task to steal evidence from the ZPD. There are all kinds of security protocols in place to prevent that kind of thing. The suspect would have needed to get through an ID scanner, know exactly where to find what they were looking for, and then get it out without being seen by anyone else. On top of that, all electronic records of such an event would need to disappear, as they did. That's not something just anyone could pull off, super criminal or not. It would require a lot of planning.  _Inside_ planning."

"Are you telling me you think there's a  _mole_  in the ZPD?" In hindsight, it seemed kind of obvious, but between being suspended and his father's shenanigans, it didn't really cross his mind at the time.

"At least one. Possibly several." For one of her "main concerns", she sure didn't convey much worry. "It would explain not only the theft, but how he's been able to stay one step ahead of your investigation at every turn."

"Do you have any suspects?" Nick quickly raised his cuffed paws. "Wait, let me guess. A certain handsome fox in the ZPD?"

She didn't even try to deny it. "A new recruit with a checkered past? It's only natural to be suspicious. No offense."

"None taken." He didn't try to hide how much that statement was a blatant lie either. "But I'm not sure what else you expect from me then. Even my own dad didn't tell me about any of this."  _Well, he sorta hinted at it, I guess._

Karen steepled her fingers in contemplation. "Perhaps not, but given your background, we hoped you could provide some insight into your fellow officers. Given your ability to sniff out a con…"

"I'm not going to sell out anyone in this precinct," he growled. "I'm trying to rebuild the bridges I've burned, not stomp on the ashes!"

It barely broke her stride. "Do you trust them, Mr. Wilde? The same way you want them to trust you?"

"You're damn right I do! These mammals aren't just my fellow officers, they're my  _friends!"_ And now that Finnick was officially lost to the dark side, they were the only friends he had left.

Without comment, Karen stood up and walked away. Nick wondered if he had somehow offended her until she used a chair to reach up and turn off the camera to the room. "Hey, I know I was being kinda cheesy there, but we still need that."

"You trust the ZPD, do you? My, how quickly things change." She came straight towards him, reaching a paw into her suit jacket. A few dozen alarm bells were instantly set off in Nick's mind and he cursed his cuffed wrists in the chance he ended up having to fight her off.  _Oh crap, is she another raccoon hitmammal my father controls? I knew I wasn't being specist!_

She thrust something towards him and Nick immediately dove out of his seat to avoid it. But Karen wasn't holding a gun or a knife or a boxing glove on a spring, just a photograph. It was of another raccoon, this one less creepy, in a black suit and grey tie, plus a snazzy pair of gold, wire-rim glasses. "Do you recognize this mammal?" she asked, almost threateningly.

Thankfully, Nick still knew (almost) everyone. "That's Kyle VanDal, the missing prosecutor from Savannah that McHorn and Wolford have been chasing for a while and he's totally related to you, isn't he?" Which answered remarkably little about what was going on here.

"That's correct," she hissed back, growing increasingly hostile. "And I'm sure you don't know this, but there is strong evidence that the ZPD themselves are behind his kidnapping."

He didn't even know it was a kidnapping. "I...can't respond to that in any way that won't anger you further, so can I just ask again what this has to do with me?"

Karen leaned closer, so close now that her cold eyes were only a good inch from his. "You're going to help me find my son,  _Officer_ Wilde, or I can promise you that losing your badge will be the least of your worries."

 _The sad part is that this is still going_ way _better than I expected._

* * *

_Sahara Square_

_Fracaso Felino_

_6: 39 PM_

Jimmy was left to his own devices while Carla and Sanchez made their preparations. With no one else to talk to, he soon found himself engaged in a heated debate with Wallace.

"I'm really starting to think we should call for backup."

" _For what? We're still technically doing our job."_

"Yeah, but Carla might be getting in over her head."

" _Wrestling isn't illegal. Or at least we can't prove it is."_

"But that lion guy is huge!"

" _Who would you rather she try to suplex? The lion, or you if you interrupt her grudge match?"_

And that's how Jimmy Frost lost the debate to his plushie. "Alright, but I should at least send an update." He pulled out his phone and went to make another call when Gomez suddenly lifted him by the back of his collar. "What do you think you're doing, niño?"

"...Trying to get a good shot for a new wallpaper?"

"Kids today," he huffed, snatching away the phone. "No recording devices or flash photography on the premises."

The fox was dropped roughly on the bleachers. "Can't I just put it on silent?"

There was a loud crunching sound, followed by a multitude of electronic parts falling onto his head. "Done."

Followed by Wallace. " _The service here stinks!"_

Gomez stared. "Is that thing alive?"

"It's kind of ambiguous."

" _Hey, what's that over there?"_

On the upside, Jimmy now had someone else to talk to. Another panel on the wall slid up, admitting a group of bruised and battered mariachi minions. "Ah, welcome, welcome!" Sanchez greeted from the ring. "You're just in time to enjoy the show!"

Gomez approached the group, whispering cautiously. "Any tails from the ZPD?"

"No, Señor Gomez," a coyote answered. "We lost them during the skirmish with Count Reynard's mammals."

"And what about  _them?"_

"Hey, check it out, mates! They got a bloomin' wrassling ring down 'ere!" Now emerged a group of suits, looking no better, but much less at home.

The coyote smiled nervously. "They were a bit more persistent."

Gomez snorted and shoved the canine aside as he cracked his knuckles. "Then let's be sure to show them a warm welcome."

The two factions drew their weapons and got ready to square off once again before a piercing screech stopped them in their tracks. It came from Sandcat's violin. "Everyone, please. There is no need to fight. That's what tonight's entertainment is for!" He strummed a few more off-key notes to make his point. "So sit down and enjoy yourselves. There will be plenty of time to work out our differences later."

No one moved, just staring awkwardly at each other to see who would go first. Gomez sighed. "Stand down, boys. You know how much El Jefe enjoys these events."

They grumbled in agreement and went to take their seats. The bull remained standing, eyes trained on the suits as if daring them to attack. A brave arctic wolf was the first to speak up. "Well...the Count's ultimate goal  _is_  unifying the gangs so, uh, I guess this in our best interests. For now." There were a few more muttered excuses between the rest of them as they sat down too.

Of course, the real reason was that it had been a long, stressful day, and everyone really just wanted to kick back and watch some wrestling. In that way, they were already unified. But they still took up separate bleachers, now leaving Jimmy Frost square in the middle of two violent criminal syndicates.  _You know, there's something to be said for loneliness._

"Hey, is that a cop?"

"Nah, he's way too scrawny. Must be a costume."

"And he's a fox. Count would probably get mad if we wasted him."

" _Hey, pick on someone your own-mmph!"_ He slapped a paw over Wallace's mouth.

They didn't get to see how close he'd just come to wetting himself because that's when the lights dimmed, signaling to all present that it was time to sit down and shut up.

A spotlight shined down on the ring, illuminating three figures: Sandcat Sanchez on violin, El Orgullo on the trumpet, and Gomez on the maracas. There were several shouts of applause mixed with gasps of horror as only the reuniting of this band could stir.

"I must sing for you a song of climax." And the trio began to play.

" _The time has cooooooome, at long, long laaaaaaast!"_

" _For Carla noooooooow, to face her paaaaaast!"_

" _Win or looooooose, this shall deciiiiiiiiiiide..."_

" _...if Carla's skiiiiiiiiill, can match her priiiiiiiiiiiiiiiide!"_

El Orgullo played a small solo on his trumpet.

" _She always waaaaas, a headstrong onnnnnnne!"_

" _But at one tiiiiiiiiiime, she could have fuuuuuuun!"_

" _Now all I seeeeeee, is a broken meeeeeeess!"_

" _Somewhat my faaaaaault...I must confeeeeeeeeess!"_

Gomez shook his maracas violently, yet still keeping in beat with the song.

" _Yet even noooooow, it's a surpriiiiiiiiiise!"_

" _How so much haaaaaaate, has filled her eyeeeeees!"_

" _So Carla deeeeeear, answer me pleeeeeeease!"_

" _Oh, why can't weeeeeeee, just shoot the breeeeeeeeze?"_

"Because you suck!"

Sanchez snarled, his claws almost slicing the violin strings as the song ended abruptly, like a needle screeching off of a record. "I had six more verses you ungrateful puta! Very well, we'll skip the pre-show and get straight to the feature presentation!" He stormed angrily out of the ring with Gomez, leaving El Orgullo standing still as a statue in the middle. Then even the spotlight in the ring went out.

The crowd erupted into boos and cheers, conveniently separated on each side by a runty arctic fox who was now scanning the room for the source of the heckling. "Carla? I know that aggressiveness from anywhere! Where are you?"

His voice barely carried above the excited crowd, and especially not when Sanchez started speaking again, this time over a megaphone. " _Buenos noches, everyone! We've got a very special exhibition match for you tonight, involving a familiar face some of you may recognize! If not, don't you worry, because it won't look the same after this match!"_

"Hey! The commentator is supposed to remain a neutral party!" Jimmy protested, once again being completely drowned out.  _Wait a minute...cheering crowd, obnoxious announcer, scary opponent...how does something like this happen two nights in a row? The academy really needs to prepare us better for deadly sporting events._

" _I now present the reigning champion of the Fracaso Felino, at five feet and 480 lbs, hailing from New Mexicow, the one, the only…Ellllllllll Orgullo!"_

The spotlight came back on, and now standing there was a lion Jimmy never would have recognized as El Orgullo if he weren't just explicitly told as much. The big cat had shed his fedora and trench coat, leaving him in only a bright yellow speedo with matching boots, as well as a patterned red on yellow mask depicting a soaring eagle. His untrimmed mane hung down behind his head, nearly reaching his waist. He seemed more than comfortable in this ridiculous attire, even taking the time to just stand there and bask in the raucous applause before he raised a large paw to silence them. The fox pulled his fingers from his ears, relieved that at least Carla was wrestling the quiet one.

El Orgullo cleared his throat, then roared with enough force to shake the ropes around the ring. "HYENANDEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZ!" The whole room shook when he started stomping around. "WHERE ARE YOU, YOU BIG POLLO?! TOO SCARED TO MEET YOUR SPOTTY MAKER?! WHEN I GET MY PAWS ON YOU, I'M GONNA CRUSH YOU INTO A BALL, THEN DRIBBLE THE BALL UNTIL YOU'RE SMALL ENOUGH TO FIT IN WITH THE REST OF YOUR FAMILY! I AM THE PRIDE OF THE PRIDELANDS! I AM THE ALPHA AND THE OMEGA AND I'M NOT EVEN A WOLF! I...AM EL ORGULLO...AND I...AM GOING...TO MAUL! YOUR! FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE!"

"Maul her face! Maul her face!" the crowd chanted, even those who had never seen him before.

Jimmy was now officially terrified, cradling Wallace for safety.  _No wonder Mom never let me watch wrestling! He's scarier than a hundred Carlas! Okay, maybe not a hundred, but at least two!_

"Relax, it's just his stupid catchphrase. Even for Sanchez, face-mauling is an illegal move."

"C-Carla?" He turned his head, then screamed and nearly fell out of the seat when he saw a giant skull staring back at him. "KILL IT WITH FIRE!"

The skeletal demon slapped him. "It's  _me_ , idiota!" She was dressed in black tights and boots with silver trims, a similarly-patterned sports bra, and was glaring at him through a black mask covered by a silver canine skull. Carla was now scarier than somewhere between three to five Carlas. He couldn't manage an exact estimate at this time. "I need you to do me a favor."

He was still petrified. "Yes?"

"Hold onto this for me." She pulled out her police badge from somewhere within her tights and passed it to him. "The rest of my uniform is in the locker room, but I can't just leave that behind. Give it to Wallace or something."

"I...guess that's okay. Hey, Wallace, I've got a bigger badge for you to try on."

" _It's not my style!"_

"Oh, quit being so stubborn!" He forcefully stuffed the badge into Wallace's chest, now bigger than most of his uniform. "See? It looks great on you!"

Carla glanced at him for just a second. "Good enough. Now you can watch as I stop both Sanchez and Wilde in one fell swoop."

"Nick?"

"I mean  _Big_ Wilde! Papa Wilde! Wilde Grande! They're both the same to me anyway."

The fox just stopped himself from getting into another fruitless argument. He'd much rather get to the bottom of her strange behavior. "Carla, before you go up there, I wanted to talk to you about…" She was already jumping into the ring. "...nothing apparently."

" _And our challenger, at three feet, eleven inches, 130 lbs before all the comfort food, hailing from who knows, who cares, give it up for tonight's unfortunate victim...La Mala Perra."_

Carla got mostly boos as she stepped into the ring, but still managed some polite applause from those rooting for the underdog. Unlike El Orgullo, her personality didn't change much as she responded by casually flipping off the audience and spitting on the floor. " _Makes you wonder who the heel is in this matchup, eh amigos?"_

Carla looked almost comically short next to the towering behemoth in front of her, but wasn't the least bit intimidated by that fact. She just looked him in the eye and said, "Hello. My name is Carla Hyenandez. You crippled my partner. Prepare to die."

All that earned her was a grimace. "WAS THAT SUPPOSED TO BE A JOKE? EL ORGULLO IS UNSURE IF HE SHOULD LAUGH."

" _Si, our former legend has lost much in the way of comedy. Let us hope her skill has not equally declined, unless of course it provides more entertainment! Now let's get this grudge match started!"_

"Not so fast! A challenger approaches!" The voice was small, but shrill.

And it was the only thing so far to strike fear into Carla's heart. "Inconceivable!"

"Don't be so happy to see me, mi corazon." Priscilla smirked, wheeling herself into the arena. Only the suited members of the audience were confused how she'd gotten up there.

Priscilla's uniform was similar to Carla's, but with a rodent skull over a purple mask and silver tights and bra marked with purple lightning bolts. Had Jimmy seen her like this when she'd attacked him, he probably would have had a heart attack.

" _Oh, what an unexpected development! It appears another fallen star, La Niñita, has joined us here tonight!"_

More cheers. The crowd was always excited for a twist.

"What are you doing here?!" Carla strained, bending down to the rat's level. "I thought I told you to beat it!"

"Did you really think you could get rid of me that easily?" Priscilla asked back, waving a tiny finger tauntingly. "I thought you would have learned from the garbage disposal incident."

"Low blow! Why do you have to bring  _that_ into it?!"

Jimmy stood up. "Hey, am I the only one wondering how she got here at all?

"That's easy. I just grabbed onto the exhaust pipe and cut the brakes on my chair, riding all the way here with you guys."

Jimmy sat down. "Okay, thanks for clearing that up."

Priscilla smiled up at her mate. "My apologies, Carla, but you're stuck with me. I don't care how hard you try to push me away, the priest said till' death do us part, so I'm not letting you go until someone pries you from my cold, atrophied hands,  _hiena obstinada morónica!"_  Somewhere along the line, this became a lot less heartwarming, but the audience "awwwwww"ed anyway.

Another deafening roar quickly put an end to that. "EL ORGULLO DOES NOT CARE ABOUT YOUR DOMESTIC DISPUTES AND WOULD LIKE TO GET TO THE MATCH! WHICH, AS EL ORGULLO WILL REMIND YOU, IS  _NOT_ TAG TEAM!"

" _He is right, of course. A noble and touching gesture this is, but also a pointless one."_

Carla turned away, trying to sound disappointed. "Rules are rules. You can't fight with me, so just go home, Priscilla."

Then yet another voice chimed in. "Awww, now where's the fun in that? If the big pussy needs a partner, I'll be happy to oblige!"

The lion's head whipped up towards the ceiling. "EL ORGULLO DOES NOT NEED ANY HELP AND WANTS EVERYONE TO STOP STEALING HIS SPOTLIGHT!" His ears twitched. "ALTHOUGH HE IS MILDLY CURIOUS WHAT THAT RUMBLING SOUND IS."

Sanchez heard it too, and knew then and there that tonight wasn't going to be as simple as he'd hoped. "Oh no."

"Oh yeeeeeeeeeeeeah!" Then the ceiling exploded. But instead of collapsing the entire building on top of them and killing everyone, it left only a tiny hole behind, just big enough for a slender mammal to drop through and descend slowly into the ring. A shower of plaster and dust fell all around the new arrival as they landed directly on one of the turnbuckles and posed dramatically.

" _What an unexpected development! Again. Would this new fighter care to give an introduction?"_

From the cloud of dust came a voice that sounded like it had inhaled too much of it. "Are yoooooou talking to meeeeeee?! I'll tellllllllllll you who I ammmmm!" The figure started to emerge from the cloud, a very shapely figure in a tight red vinyl jacket with a black angel wing design on the back, a crimson fanged mask, a pair of colored shades and a goofy hat. Below that she wore a red bikini bottom...and nothing else. "My name isssssssssssssssss…"

Jimmy gasped. "Hey, it's that crazy bat lady Judy was talking about!"

"Interrupt me again, and I'll snap into  _you_ , Slim Jim!" she snarled. "Now as I was sayiiiiiiiiiiiiing, my name isssssssssss…"

"Look, it's Lucy!"

"Oh yeah, I remember her from around the hideout!"

"Actually, I think she's going by Queen of Hearts now!"

"Wait, I thought her name was Batbunny!"

She screeched loudly in indignation, making even those not covering their ears before do it now. "Ugh, you  _ruined_ it!" Lucy tossed the hat to the floor and stomped on it, immediately switching back to her normal voice. "I had a whole big thing planned for that, guys! Really!"

Carla, Priscilla, and El Orgullo exchanged looks. Even Sanchez was getting annoyed by the constant interruptions himself. "Excuse me, señorita, much as I appreciate a good entrance, we can't have just anyone joining a match whenever they feel like it. You're not even a registered fighter here!"

The bat was in his face in less than a second, holding out a rolled up document. "My name, measurements, hometown, and even signature moves. That should be enough, right?" She smiled and flitted her unseen eyelashes at him.

Thoroughly caught off-guard, the feline resigned himself to the fact that the plan for tonight was already botched and took the paper, reading it over. "So you are 'La Sangrienta Baronesa', measurements are 'none of your business' and...did you seriously write 'from Parts Unknown'?"

"It's a nice place. I don't know why it gets such a bad rep." She shrugged. "Honestly, I thought the first thing you'd notice is that it's written in blood."

"Dios mio!"

"Just kidding!" she cackled. "It's red pen! Everyone knows blood is only good for drinking and painting!"

Sanchez glowered at her over the now-crumpled paper. "You're not going to leave quietly, are you?"

"I think the question you should be asking is does your audience  _want_ me to?" She fluttered out into the ring, perching herself on the tallest post she could find. "Come on, who wants me?!" The crowd erupted with shouts of approval, even from the half who had no idea who she was. "I know, but you can't have me!" she giggled.

"EL ORGULLO DOES NOT WANT YOU, ALTHOUGH HE DOES WANT YOU  _OFF!_ " The lion reached up to swat the bat on his head, but she was already gone.

"I hate to say it, but I agree with the big cabron," Priscilla spoke up. "The bat doesn't belong here, and frankly, she's making a mockery of our entire profession."

"No one invited  _you_  either!" Carla insisted. "So why don't both of you just take a hike and let me settle this my way?!"

"You don't like me?" Lucy pouted, hovering sadly in mid-air. "No, you're right. Who am I to stand in your way? I'll just go then…" Amidst protests from the audience, she waved goodbye and flew back up into the ceiling hole.

Carla blinked. "Huh. That was easy."

Before someone could so much as amend that with "Too easy", a series of small objects dropped out of the hole and into the ring. Gasps rang out across the room, but especially right there in the center. It didn't take long to identify what had fallen.

It was three bloodless rat bodies.

"Oops, I dropped my food wrappers! I'm such a litterbug!"

"I'll kill her!" Carla had to grab her mate out of the air as she attempted to fly after her. "Get down here and fight! You want a piece of me so bad, I'll give you something to chew on! I'll rip off your fangs and shove them so far up your backside you'll have to literally eat out of your ass!"

"Okay!" Lucy popped back out of the ceiling with no further prompting.

" _What a slightly more expected, but still generally unexpected development! It appears our new challenger is just_ full _of surprises!"_

"EVEN EL ORGULLO IS SHOCKED."

Carla would've joined in, but she suddenly found herself out of words. This was her family she was looking at and she couldn't help but feel that their deaths were her fault. Just the latest link in a long chain of mistakes. And it was only going to get longer because there was now not even the slightest chance of Priscilla backing down.

Then might as well make the best of it. "Mi corazon...let's do this."

Priscilla finally stopped struggling, looking back at her mate. "You mean it? You want us to fight together again?"

She gently lowered the rodent back into her chair. "If it means avenging our familia, I will do anything. You know that." Thankfully, the mask concealed her eye contact, or lack thereof.

"I do. And just like when I said those words all those years ago, I have vows to make." She reached up with a tender paw...and put Carla's tail in a death grip. "I vow that whatever is going on with you, when this match is over,  _you will tell me everything!"_ Her tone implied very severe consequences if her demands were not met. "Comprende?"

Carla made the mistake of hesitating. "Uh...well, I…"

With one fierce yank, the rat pulled her down to ground level to stare her right in the eyes. " **COMPRENDE?!"**

It was times like these that Carla was reminded of how much her mate drove her crazy. And how much she drove her  _crazy._ "Okay, okay! We'll figure this out after the fight, I promise."

"Then what are we waiting for?" She released her grip on the hyena and prepped herself. "Sanchez, are we ready to go or what?"

"I have  _been_ ready!" the feline hissed. "Fine! It's a tag team match now! But if anyone else tries to jump in, they will be shot on sight!"

"HEY, EL ORGULLO IS STILL NOT-"

The megaphone blasted into his ear. " _Silencio! The bat is your partner now! Deal with it!"_

Lucy blew a raspberry in the other. "Yeah, deal with it."

" _Now then, if everyone is finally prepared, let's get this show on the road!_

On one side of the ring: La Mala Perra and La Niñita. On the other: El Orgullo and La Sangrienta Baronesa. And watching them were Jimmy Frost, Sandcat Sanchez, a plushie with a badge, three dead rats in a towel, and a whole ton of interested mammals just looking for a good time, not at all realizing the significance of what was about to happen.

"Peel your beady eyes, Wallace. This one is going to be big," Jimmy advised, the plushie still gripping Carla's badge tightly.

He had  _no_ idea.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How's that for getting back on track? Only took about three weeks to whip up this bad boy (not counting the time I took to write "Nick Wilde: Ace Attorney, which was still pretty quick for a five chapter story). Team BerserkMind is back in business!
> 
> Danny belongs to me. He's not only another shameless KFP parody, he's a shameless parody of one of my KFP OC's. Oh, the levels we will sink. But at least now you finally know what was up with the two Sanchez's.
> 
> Karen VanDal belongs to Mind Jack. If you're confused about why it's taking so long to make the obvious connection here, remember that no one on the ZPD side knows Simon's last name yet.
> 
> Disclaimer: I have next to NO knowledge of professional wrestling and especially not Lucha Libre. All references in this chapter come from co-author and wrestling fan Mind Jack, who helped out more than you can imagine with this and the next chapter. Thanks again for sticking by me, man. :)
> 
> We haven't really bothered to translate most of the gratuitous Spanish being thrown around, but since there will be quite a lot of it coming up, let's at least give you the names of all of our wrestlers:
> 
> El Orgullo: The Pride (Spanish Hulk Hogan, let's be honest here. And no, he doesn't scream ALL of his lines, he just has a lot of presence. Think "The Boulder" from Avatar.)
> 
> La Mala Perra: The Bad Bitch (Vaguely based on the Great Gonzalez, with moves based on Jack Swagger.)
> 
> La Niñita: The Little Girl (Rey Mysterio, especially with his nickname.)
> 
> La Sangrienta Baronesa: The Bloody Baroness (Randy Savage, or at least she tried to be. Sorry, couldn't keep THAT up for an entire fight.)
> 
> One last thing, since we got surprisingly few responses to our reader question last time (a lot was going on, we forgive you), we're going to repeat it once more: What ringtones do you think are a good fit for the various characters of BtBW?


	23. No Laughing Matter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Are you ready to rumbleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee?! Sure hope so by now. It's a new year and a new anniversary marker for good ol' BtBW! Let's celebrate by watching masked wrestlers beat the tar out of each other! :D
> 
> Word of warning: this chapter is almost entirely Carla. All Carla, all the time. Because who wants to read a Zootopia fic about Nick and Judy, right? The thing is, Carla has become a bit of a polarizing character from what we've seen, and this chapter...probably isn't going to change that, but enjoy anyway! (Please?)

****

**Chapter 23: No Laughing Matter**

_Inside the Countmobile_

_7:00 PM_

"This is boring."

Count Reynard never thought he could attribute that word to anything he did in his long and illustrious career as a criminal psychopath, yet here he was, sulking in the backseat of a stolen limousine, doing whatever he could to entertain himself.

He started with pacing, which quickly lost its luster in those limited confines.

Then he practiced his cane twirling. No matter how he felt right now, dropping the thing in the middle of a monologue again would just be embarrassing.

After that, he laid back across the seat for a while, tossing the spare Night Howler pellet from his cane into the air and catching it.

That gave him the idea to start making howling noises in the hopes of tripping up the wolves outside. Still didn't work. Even in death, Lady Lang found ways to ruin his fun.

This was followed by Minesheeper. Clearly, he was getting desperate now.

Next, he shuffled and reshuffled a deck of playing cards, now actively trying to assign a card to every single member of his organization. He then reminded himself that Seven of Spades still owed him money from their game with Three of Hearts and King of Diamonds.

He dug up an old rubix cube, solved it, switched all of the stickers around, solved it again.

Finally, he checked the time. "How the hell has it only been ten minutes?!"

There was a sort of restlessness hanging over his entire operation right now. Could the wolves complete his project in time? Would his agents at the hotel manage their own mission? Did any of it even matter now that Nicholas had taken himself out of the equation? He didn't know the answer to any of these questions, and if he weren't insane already, he would definitely be approaching it trying to figure them out.

So Reynard decided to do what he did best: plot and scheme. Maybe there was nothing he could do to egg his henchmammals along (at the moment), but he could certainly make backup plans. He practically had a Master's degree in backup plans! All he had to do was think of a scenario where someone other than his son had to take over the empire.

What about Koslov? He was strong, focused, determined, fairly intelligent, had helped murder his last employer in cold blood and was now despised by most of his former subordinates...okay, next.

Finnick then? He had worked closely with his son after all. Surely he had a good deal of business savvy under his belt. Then again, he definitely came across as more brawn than brains, and he wasn't particularly brawny at that. His temperament didn't exactly scream leadership either, just threats of the face-biting variety.

Simon? Too unreliable. Lucy? Too unpredictable. Harvey? Too cowardly. The wolves? Too disloyal. Fangs and Boomer? Did he seriously just consider handing the reins over to  _naturalists?_ Also, he was pretty sure he Night Howler'ed them…well, poop.

That settled it then. The only ones he could trust to run this thing when he was gone were his own family members, which of course he knew before he even started. That left him with only two options. Okay, technically three, but if Marian didn't want anything to do with him  _before…_

And with that reminder, bargaining gave way to depression. Reynard sighed, slumping over onto the seat. He needed something to take his mind off of this.  _Anything_.

Maybe now was the time to consult one of his favorite shows. It couldn't hurt at this point, right? Reynard dug into the seat cushions for the remote, then flipped on a small TV screen that came down from the ceiling. It did the job instantly.

"Oooh, wrestling!" Reynard sat back up and watched closely, his only regret now being a lack of popcorn.

He put his phone up to his ear. "Koslov? I have a job for you…"

* * *

_Sahara Square_

_Fracaso Felino_

_Match Time: 0:01_

_The bell rang out loudly across the ring as the two luchadores collided with each other._

_As the commentators had covered in great detail, tonight's exhibition match was between reigning champion El Orgullo and perpetual underdog La Niñita. Underdog only due to her size, as she pretty much slaughtered every opponent she went up against, and that was_ without  _her tag-team partner. Said partner was relegated to the sidelines for this one, but made no attempt to hide her presence or affiliation. Carla Hyenandez, here known as La Mala Perra, was in full wrestling uniform and shouting cheers of encouragement to her mate from ringside._

_Priscilla made a good show of pretending she actually needed it, zipping around El Orgullo's clumsy swings and stomps, then striking back with punishing body blows. For such an imposing figure, the champ looked like a total pussycat compared to her. It was almost a bit underwhelming._

" _Yeeeeeeeeah! You maul_ his  _face, Priscilla!" Carla cheered. "Then every other part of his body too! Go to town!"_

" _Such passion! I'd feel inclined to sing about it, but it is too loud in here." Somewhere along the line, new crime lord on the block Sandcat Sanchez had decided to join her._

 _Carla's enthusiasm died instantly. "Not loud_ enough,  _clearly."_

" _Porque?"_

" _Nevermind." Carla glared down at the falsely friendly feline, crossing her arms. "What are you doing here?"_

" _I own this ring," he replied simply. "And the circuit. And you. Or did you forget?"_

" _Must've slipped my mind." It amazed her that he was still standing there, despite her practically radiating her disdain for him as a physical aura of hate. Admittedly, she had to give him a little respect for that, but just a little._

 _Priscilla catapulted herself off of one of the ropes and flew over El Orgullo's snapping jaws, grabbing him by the mane and pulling him down to the ring with a tremendous slam. She jumped onto his chest and raised her arms, silently announcing her victory. "Eat steaming mierde, Orgullo!"_ Mostly  _silent. A frightened-looking elk referee moved in and began the count._

" _Uno…!"_

_Carla smirked. What was she doing letting Sanchez distract her from what really mattered? She threw her head back and let loose the greatest cheer of all, then sent that same confident smirk right back at him. "You may own us, but Priscilla just owned your almighty champion."_

" _I can see that," he said, stroking his whiskers in a very passive aggressive manner. "It's quite a pity, really. I must admit I was expecting a different outcome."_

" _Dos…!"_

_Carla remained unsympathetic. "Sucks to be you then, doesn't it?"_

" _Si, si it does. More than you could know. To think, so many mammals would support a rat defeating a cat! A total perversion of the natural order!" He spat onto the ground in disgust, which was quickly wiped up by a custodial mouse. "Now that is more like it."_

" _Wait a minute…" Carla narrowed her eyes at him. "Did you bet against Priscilla?!"_

" _Of course I did. Why do you think this count is taking so long?"_

" _...Dos and a half…?"_

" _If everyone insists on putting their hopes in a rodent, it is only my natural obligation to feed off of her," Sanchez continued. "If only she agreed to take the fall like I ordered her to."_

" _Hmph. You should've known better than to think Priscilla would ever throw a match. Unlike_ you,  _she has a sense of honor."_

" _Oh, but I_ did  _know better…" Without warning, Sanchez put two fingers to his lips and let out a loud, sharp whistle, piercing enough to be heard even over the commotion in the ring._

" _...Dos and three-"_

" _Hey, what gives?!" Priscilla snapped, taking a menacing step towards the ref. "You better finish that damn count or so help me-URK!" El Orgullo's massive paws suddenly closed around her. Smirking smugly, the lion rose to his feet, taking Priscilla with him._

" _Priscilla!" Carla was on the move instantly, attempting to climb into the ring. She made it halfway there before a pair of tigers, put in position for this exact purpose, yanked her back off. Fuming, the hyena was hoisted up, forced to watch what came next._

" _Did you_  really  _think my star fighter would be beaten so easily?" Sanchez asked, a cruel smile on his lips. "This was all a lesson, dear Carla. One that you and your treacherous mate will not soon forget!" El Orgullo held Priscilla's torso within one paw and her legs in the other, showing her off for the entire viewing audience to see. Both hyena and rat struggled against their captors, but it was too little, too late._

" _NO!" Carla screamed._

_El Orgullo twisted._

_*SNAP*_

Carla shook her head violently. She wouldn't let the sound of a bell throw her off this easily, Packlov be damned!

But it was too late. As soon as the referee, the same frightened-looking elk as a matter of fact, signaled for the match to start, Carla found herself lifted off the ground by her face. "YOU SHOULD HAVE STAYED HOME TODAY,  _PERRA,"_  said El Orgullo with a smug grin. Carla had been thrown through the air before, but only rarely with the sheer dismissal El Orgullo tossed her into the corner with. Her head hit the top turnbuckle, which certainly wasn't helping her keep it in the game.

" _El Orgullo is off to a great start! La Mala Perra is clearly showin' ring rust here!"_ yelled one of Sanchez's commentators, a portly tasmanian devil in a dirty tan suit. Irwin "The Devil" Devin was both a longtime commentator and a longtime resident of Outback Island. It showed.

Carla narrowly rolled out of the way of the charging lion. As he turned to face her, a pair of booted hyena feet collided with his nose, sending him stumbling back to the turnbuckle. "GAH! YOU CANNOT KEEP  _EL ORGULLO_ DOWN! HE WILL-!"

El Orgullo was interrupted by Carla's fist between his eyes.

" _Ohhhhhh! Pride before a fall!"_ the tazzy said with a laugh.

" _That pun was terrible, Devin,"_ the other commentator, a very boring-looking rodent in a gray sweater vest told him.

"You're  _terrible, Vole. That's why no one likes you."_ Michael Vole shrugged in neutral agreement.

The hyena was practically savage as she drove El Orgullo into the corner, jumping up onto the middle rope to better pummel the lion's face in. His head snapped back and forth painfully with each swing. A vicious smile split Carla's face. Her heart was thudding out of her chest, adrenaline rushing through her veins. She hadn't felt so alive in  _years!_

" _La Mala Perra has officially shaken the rust off!"_ Vole exclaimed.

" _She'd better! I came outta retirement for this! Do you have any idea how hard it is to book passage from Outback Island at this time of night?"_

El Orgullo managed to gather his few wits together enough to shove Carla off of him. His vision blurry, he stumbled off into a different corner.

Strangely enough, there were three bats there. He could have sworn there had been only one before. "You're doin' great out there!" they cheered in unison. All three held up a wing. "High five!"

Well, who was he to say no? He held up a paw for the three of them to slap.

"Tag!" the ref announced.

Wait, what?

Lucy giggled. "Looks like it's my turn! Wish me luck,  _partner._ "

El Orgullo growled, but stepped between the ropes to rest on the corner. He wasn't in very good condition to argue.

" _It seems El Orgullo has been tricked by his own partner."_

" _Hey, just like you got tricked by your wife, Vole. How many of those muskrats did she tag in? Four? Five?"_

" _I lost count."_

* * *

"Hey, she's not doing too bad so far," Jimmy said, Wallace perched on his lap in the bleachers. The Wallabeanie still held tight to Carla's ZPD badge, wearing it with as much pride as a plushie could. "Think she can keep it up?"

" _I dunno, why don't you go up there and ask her?"_

"Please stop trying to get me killed."

"Are you quite enjoying yourself, Señor?" It was then that he remembered the current seating arrangement, which now placed Sandcat Sanchez on one side and his large, imposing chief of security Gomez on the other. Neither looked particularly happy with their guest.

Jimmy failed to pick up on that completely. "Yeah, I'm having a blast. Thank you for your hospitality."

Sanchez stared at him for a moment, twirling a whisker, until he finally decided the fox wasn't being sarcastic. "...I cannot resent such politeness, especially from  _un canino_  where it is so very rare."

"Right, right." Jimmy nodded along, not at all realizing he'd just insulted himself. He turned to Gomez and gave him a friendly nudge in the side. "Hey, did I tell you guys about the time I competed in a bike derby?" Gomez growled at him.

Perhaps he was becoming a bit  _too_ used to this kind of thing.

* * *

_Match Time: 2: 41_

Lucy forwent walking in favor of flying up to Carla, landing on her shoulder with a cheeky grin. "Heya, sweet cheeks. I like the mask. It's a real improvement on your face."

Carla swiped at Lucy, who immediately slipped to the other shoulder. "Geez, I knew you were slow in the head, but you're also just plain slow. You're more useless than Meals on Wheels over there." Another swipe. "Y'know, once you're down, I'll have free access to her." Another dodge. "You think I should drink her dry, like I did the others?" Lucy slipped out of an attempt to grab her around the torso. "Or maybe I should make like Harvey and set her on fire. Hey, then I can call her Hot Wheels! Hee hee!" This time she slipped onto Carla's muzzle, right between her mask's canine fangs. Carla was so infuriated, she didn't see the problem trying to punch her there. Her nose crunched as it was nearly broken by her own punch. "C'mon, Chuckles, I've got the crowd laughing themselves to death," Lucy teased from atop the fallen hyena's head. "That's supposed to be  _your_ job!"

Vole nodded. " _Baronessa's got a point, Perra. You_ are  _the hyena."_

" _Hey, not cool! I thought you were above stereotype jokes, Vole."_

" _Wha-the bat just made a murder joke!"_

A deep growl emerged from Carla's throat. Lucy was right. Despite the dark tone to her taunts, the audience  _was_ laughing, laughing at and mocking the pain and misery she and her mate had gone through for years. "Shut…your…mouth!" she snarled viciously.

Lucy calmly examined her claws as she sidestepped Carla's wild haymaker...right into the paw grabbing her from the other side. She choked as she felt the viselike grip wrap around her. "Oh, guano…"

" _That, children, means bat shit,"_ Devin explained.

"There are children  _here?!"_

Carla brought the bat up to her face, showing off a cruel smile. "How do you get a bat out of a belfry?" she asked.

Lucy gulped. "Uh...how?"

Carla drew back her fist. "By ringing her bell."

The punch felt like a windshield ramming into a bug, satisfying  _thud_ included. Lucy went flying out of the ring, landing on the floor and out of sight.

Carla ran to the ropes, scanning the outside. "Where did you go,  _maldita puta estúpida_ _?!_ I'm not done with you!"

_*CLANG!*_

Carla stumbled backward, eyes spinning in circles before she fell onto her rear. Lucy dropped the frying pan she'd swung into the hyena's face. "Guile and preparation beat youth, enthusiasm, age, and experience," the bruised bat said, dusting off her claws.

" _That's pretty philosophical coming from someone who just used a frying pan as a weapon. Where'd that come from anyway?"_

" _Don't you know anything, Vole? It's not a true wrestling match without miscellaneous blunt objects lying all over the place!"_

Lucy flew over to her corner, slapping El Orgullo on the shoulder. "Your turn, lunkhead. I need a break." The lion stepped into the ring, cracking his knuckles as he watched Carla stagger back to her corner.

"Maybe it's good I'm here after all," Priscilla quipped, tagging the hyena on the nose.

Carla watched her mate wheel herself into the ring, trying to remind herself that she could still put up a good fight. Even so, she couldn't help but think back to that day she first saw her...

" _Where is she?!" Carla demanded._

_The hospital receptionist, a female panther, leaned away from her slightly. "You're going to have to be more specific, ma'am."_

_Seeing that she was making a scene, Carla cleared her throat and forced herself into something that resembled calmness. She visibly trembled from the effort. "Priscilla Rodentriguez, por favor. She should have just come out of surgery."_

_The panther nodded and spent a few moments to look up the name while Carla's claws hammered against the desk. "Ah yes. Are you friend or family?"_

" _Family." The feline gave her a look. "Yes,_ really!  _I should be in the system! Carla Hyenandez?"_

" _Alright…" she said skeptically, looking her up too. "Very well, she is in room 106, down the hall to the-HEY!" Without so much as a "gracias", Carla swept past her and into the hall. Every other hospital worker between her and her mate knew better to get out of the way._

" _Priscilla!" Carla kicked open the door to her room hard enough to bend the hinges. The rat naturally didn't mind, and neither did her miniature relatives, but the antelope nurse seemed to share the receptionist's sentiment. Priscilla quickly shooed her out as Carla came into the room, signaling the hyena to come towards her. She did so gladly, leaning down over the small frame covered by hospital sheets and bandages. "How are you doing?"_

" _Could be better," she said, shrugging off both her condition and whatever painkillers she must have still been on. "Might make wrestling a little harder though."_

" _Priscilla, how could you say that?" Elizabeth asked, coming forward to hold her bandaged paw. "There's no way you can fight again after that injury."_

" _What injury?" Carla pressed. "Is one of her legs broken? Both of them? All four of her limbs? Whatever the case, I can wait as long as she needs to recover!"_

_Several of the other rats looked away uncomfortably. Elizabeth just sighed, kneeling in front of her daughter-in-law. "She's...not going to recover, Carla. Her spine is broken. She'll have to spend the rest of her life...in a chair."_

_On cue, the rat chorus burst into tears, sobbing uncontrollably. Elizabeth bit her lip, trying to remain strong, but clearly fighting tears herself. Carla took a step back, her breath catching in her throat as she struggled to respond._

_Pretty much the only one not devastated by Priscilla's crippling was Priscilla. "Guys, come on, it's not that bad! I've already watched a ton of movies about mammals who can still kick ass in wheelchairs! It's just another challenge to overcome!"_

" _Y-Yeah," Carla managed to say. "Can't be any greater challenge than marrying_ me  _at least."_

" _Whether you think you can do it or not, no official league is going to accept that!" Elizabeth snapped back at her daughter's carefree attitude. "And there is no way I'm letting you back into Sanchez's ring! I am sorry, Priscilla, but your wrestling career is over."_

_At this, Priscilla's face finally fell. "Oh...well, that's alright too. I can still help around the house...and spend time with you...and be with my mate…" Something else must have occurred to her just then because now even she was crying, her facade of indifference finally crumbling. "...somehow."_

_A loud crash sounded from across the room, the imminent result of Carla punching over an IV stand. The sight of Priscilla's tears had broken_ her  _calm as well, but her reaction was quite different. "He's going to pay for this."_

" _Who is?" Elizabeth asked before she could stop herself._

" _Sanchez!" she snarled. "That_ bastardo  _came into our world, disgraced our culture, and now he's hurt our_ familia?!  _I won't let him get away with this! I will have my revenge!" She capped off her monologue by lifting one of the other hospital beds and chucking it through the window. It hit a car somewhere down below and set off an alarm._

" _That's going to add to the bill," Elizabeth muttered. The other rats nodded, unphased by the hyena's destructive tendencies._

" _Carla, I know how you feel, but there's nothing you can do about Sanchez!" Priscilla protested, quickly forgetting her own sorrow. "You know as well as I do that he's too powerful! Not even the ZPD can touch him!"_

_This succeeded in defusing Carla, but not in the way she wanted. "The ZPD...that's it! If I could join the ZPD, I'll have access to all of their resources and I then I can really put the hurt on Sanchez! They think he's too scary to deal with, just wait until they get a look at me!"_

_Priscilla shared a concerned glance with the rest of the family. "You...want to become a police officer?"_

_Carla looked back at them, grinning from ear to ear. "Yeah? What's wrong with that?"_

" _Uh…"_

 _Elizabeth chose to step in. "Carla, you are a very..._ spirited  _mammal, but I'm not sure your mindset is in the right place to be an officer of the law."_

" _What are you talking about? I'm trying to get justice for mi familia_.  _That's the best mindset I can have." She looked back and forth at the increasingly concerned faces. "Why are you trying to stop me?! I'm doing this for_ you!"

 _Priscilla extended her finger and beckoned her over. As Carla leaned down again, the rat reached up and kissed her lightly on the nose. "You have already done plenty for us, mi corazon_.  _I don't need revenge. Just stay with me."_

_Carla smiled warmly, nuzzling her mate gently with her much larger head. "You are so strong, Priscilla. But I need to be strong for you too." She pulled away abruptly, stepping back towards the door. "And I need to submit an application while I still have time! I'll be back as soon as I'm done!" She winked slyly at her. "Then we'll explore what you can still do with the top half of your body."_

_Priscilla couldn't help but smile at that, even as Elizabeth blushed and shook her head. "I'll look forward to it. Love you!"_

" _Love you too!" Carla blew a kiss then slammed the door. It fell off of its hinges seconds later._

" _Why didn't you stop her?" Elizabeth asked, still disapproving._

_She shrugged. "I know better than to try to do the impossible."_

" _I'm not even going to comment on that," she said blankly._

" _It doesn't matter." Priscilla lied back in her bed, smiling. "She'll be back and I'll be waiting."_

Of course, Carla wasn't actually  _there_  for that last conversation, but she was pretty sure that's how it must have gone.

Yes, Priscilla would be just fine. She  _had_  to be.

* * *

Jimmy wasn't so sure. "Even as someone who's been almost emasculated by her, I have doubts about Priscilla's chances."

"You don't need to worry," Sanchez said. "About being emasculated, I mean. You're already there, amigo."

"The rat's probably going to die," Gomez said bluntly.

"Si, that seems likely."

"Oh no!" Jimmy gasped. "Wallace can't see a thing at her size!" He lifted the Wallabeanie up in his arms so that he could see Priscilla clearly. "There, that's better."

" _I'm king of the world and she's queen of the ring!"_

Sanchez glanced over at him. "You are one disturbed Niñito."

* * *

_Match Time:_ _7: 24_

" _Uhhhhhh, how is this gonna work? La Niñita is in a wheelchair after El Orgullo broke her back."_

" _It's called bein' handicapable, Vole!"_

El Orgullo and Priscilla both approached the center of the ring. "LA NIÑITA! YOU HAVE ALREADY BEEN PROVEN TO BE NOTHING BEFORE THE MIGHT OF EL ORGULLO! SURRENDER NOW, AND HE MAY SHOW MERCY!"

Priscilla adjusted the straps holding her in her chair. "I will never surrender. And don't bother showing mercy.  _I won't."_

El Orgullo snatched her in one large paw as he laughed in her face. "FOOLISH GIRL! EL ORGULLO WILL INSTEAD SHOW YOU AN ETERNITY OF PAIN!" He slammed Priscilla around like a rag doll, stomping down on her, and punting her across the ring to bounce off the ropes, before casually putting up his fist for her to slam into. "HAHAHAHA! WRITHE IN EL ORGULLO'S CAGE OF TORMENT!"

" _El Orgullo proves his namesake by being_ way  _too proud of himself for beating up a cripple!"_

" _I think she might be dead, Devin."_

The lion cackled victoriously, dropping Priscilla down for another punt. She landed easily on the mat, as his foot stopped halfway. "WHAT?! EL ORGULLO DOES NOT UNDERSTAND WHY HIS LEGS BETRAY HIM!" He leaned in closer, seeing that his boot laces had been tied together. "IMPOSSIBLE!"

"Completely possible," Priscilla disagreed as she pushed herself up into a semi-handstand. " _You_ need an eternity to cause enough pain to make someone submit...I only need a moment.  _Abrazar la muerte!"_

She sprang up absurdly high, landing hard enough on his chest to knock him off his feet. She gripped a fistful of his neck fur in one hand, and rocketed the other into his chin. El Orgullo gained a bad case of whiplash as she used him as a makeshift punching bag. When he tried to swat her off, his meaty paw was caught. He was tossed around the ring as if he weighed no more than she did, his shoulder very nearly pulled out of its socket in the process.

" _Now_ that  _I'm pretty sure is impossible!"_

" _Not in the world of television, Vole."_

That same arm was wrenched up behind him. Instantly, he became filled with fear. "NO! EL ORGULLO DOES NOT WANT THAT!"

Priscilla shot him the cutest, most innocent, and most terrifying grin he had ever seen. It made Carla swoon.

Devin did a spit take into an unamused Vole's face. " _Oh jeez! Are we about to see the Black Plague!?"_

What occurred next was too terrible to describe or commentate. El Orgullo screamed with the terror of a soul trapped in the depths of Hell. The entire crowd recoiled. A mother covered her child's eyes.

" _T-That is not audience appropriate!"_

" _I like it!"_ said Devin with a grin.

Thankfully for El Orgullo, it seemed Priscilla was in a merciful mood; or perhaps she just wanted to torture him more later.

Lucy gave a cheeky grin as her partner crawled weakly towards her. "O. M. G! El Orgullo!? I'm your biggest fan! Can you sign my wing?"

El Orgullo could barely see at this point. He reached out unsteadily to satisfy his fan, only to feel a light tap on his knuckle. "Tag!"

Vole shook his head. " _This is really not his night."_

El Orgullo's arm flopped to the mat and he rolled onto the apron. ' _DAMN THAT BLASTED BAT,'_ he thought to himself as he slowly pulled himself to his feet.

* * *

"So she did better than expected," Sanchez admitted. "She just took him by surprise, that's all. Who  _wouldn't_ underestimate a pitiful creature like that?"

"I'm sorry, did you say something?" Jimmy asked, still holding Wallace into the air.

" _She totally kicked that big kitty's ass!"_

"Wallace,  _language."_

Sanchez apparently thought this conversation wasn't worth continuing because he turned back to the ring. "Well, It doesn't matter. She can't last much longer with her injuries."

* * *

_Match Time: 11: 05_

Lucy sauntered up to Priscilla, who wheeled around her warily. "Hey, Prissy. I'm surprised that you came into work today. I heard a bunch of your relatives got drained like juice boxe- _ack!"_

A single punch sent her involuntarily flying back. She struck the ropes, somehow managing to get tangled to the point that she couldn't get out.

Devin rubbed at his eyes. " _What just happened? I blinked and missed it."_

* * *

"Wow, that was pretty quick!" Jimmy said excitedly. He turned towards a gaping Sanchez. "But seriously, what was that you were saying before?"

Gomez lifted him up by the back of his collar, pulling his fist back threateningly. "Put him down, Gomez." Sanchez sighed. "I don't believe he is even physically capable of being a smartass."

"Correct!" Jimmy cheerfully confirmed. Gomez grunted and dropped him. "You know, you should really find some less violent ways of expressing yourself."

"What do you think my music is for?" Sanchez asked bitterly. "Ever since I was a kitten, I used the power of song to soothe my tattered soul. But the critics, they deny me my passion! They say I am 'lackluster' and 'tasteless' and 'uninspired' and that I suck, but I showed them!"

Jimmy put an arm around his shoulder, an action that put Gomez even more on edge. "I get it now," he said sympathetically. "You became a crime lord so you could prove all your critics wrong. You just wanted to be appreciated."

Sanchez looked confused. "What are you talking about? I became a crime lord because I'm cruel, greedy, and selfish. Being able to maintain a literal captive audience is just a bonus."

"Oh." Jimmy withdrew his arm, disappointed. "I thought that was gonna be, like, your origin story."

"Life is not a comic book!" he snapped, turning back to the match. "Now sit back and watch my masked friend in tights save the day."

* * *

_Match Time: 11: 06_

El Orgullo, who had finally fixed his boot laces and recovered most of his dignity, tapped Lucy on the back with a claw. "REVENGE IS A DISH BEST SERVED WITH A SIDE OF THE FIERY WRATH OF EL ORGULLO!"

To Carla's surprise, Priscilla wheeled up to her for a tag as well. "That  _coño_ doesn't deserve the satisfaction. I'll come back in on my own terms, when it brings the most despair to his heart."

"You frighten me sometimes, mi corazon."

"Good. You're learning."

Carla stepped past her mate, into the ring. "We meet again, mi querido. Shall we dance?"

El Orgullo gave an irritated growl. "YOU WILL PAY FOR THE INSOLENCE YOU HAVE SHOWN EL ORGULLO! EL ORGULLO WILL-! HEY! WHAT ARE YOU-!?"

_*THUD!*_

Carla had no more patience for this. She had moved as soon as he growled, picking him up and slamming him directly on the back of his head. "And  _you_ will pay for all the hearing damage you've caused tonight!"

" _My doctor isn't cheap either!"_

" _Please, this is nothing compared to some of the clubs on Outback."_

"EL ORGULLO WILL-AGH!" He was cut off roughly by Carla headbutting him in the nose.

"Pipe down," she commanded.

"NEVER! EL ORGULL-OW! STOP HEADBUTTING EL-GAH!"

" _I don't think that's what 'use your head' means, Perra."_

" _Hey, that line was actually funny, Vole!"_

" _Thank you!"_ Vole replied, genuinely pleased.

" _Don't let it go to your head. Then you'll end up like_ him."

"You can stop this any time!"

"EL ORG-AHH!"

"At this point, you might as well be hitting  _yourself!"_

"El Orgullo...will be… more considerate...to the ears of others…" The lion fell to his knees and then onto his back.

"Good kitty. Now, stay down." Carla stood up and turned to walk back to her corner.

El Orgullo growled quietly as he pushed himself to his feet. His successful ascent was rewarded by Carla's forearm slamming into his collarbone, a clothesline hard enough to physically bowl him over once again. "Bad kitty!" she scolded.

Lifting him up by the scruff of his neck, she wrapped her arms around his abdomen. As his legs lifted off the ground, he was just lucid enough to realize what was going on and started to struggle. "NO! NO!"

Carla held on stubbornly. "Awwww, El Orgullo, you sound sad. Y'know, I have a special kind of laugh that cheers people up reeeeeal quick."

"EL ORGULLO DOES NOT WANT YOUR SICK IDEA OF TREATMENT!"

Vole took a big sip of water, then did a spit take back into Devin's face. " _Oh my stars and garters! Are we about to see the Last Laugh?!"_

Carla swung El Orgullo up, planting him down on the back of his head. ' _EL ORGULLO IS NOT SURE IF HIS VISION IS BLURRED FROM HEAD TRAUMA, OR HIS EYES VIBRATING IN HIS SKULL…!'_ the confused cat thought to himself as he lay looking up at the lights. ' _AT LEAST THE BIRDIES SWIRLING IN HIS VISION ARE PROPERLY ADORABLE.'_

Once again picking up Orgullo by his neck fur, Carla shoved him back over to his corner. "It's been fun, puss-puss, but you can go home now."

" _Is it just me, or is El Orgullo actually not that good of a wrestler?"_

" _He's called 'The Pride' not 'The Talent', Vole. Pretty sure he only wins because Sanchez rigs all his fights."_

A shrill, feline voice yelled from the audience. "H-Hey! I hired you to  _commentate_ , not  _speculate!"_

Lucy offered her wing to the battered lion. "Ya did good out there, El Orgullo. How about a congratulatory shake?"

He angrily slapped the wing away. "EL ORGULLO WILL NOT FALL FOR YOUR TRICKS AGAIN, WINGED HEATHEN!"

"Tag!"

Devin chuckled. " _Heh heh, I like this girl."_

"EL ORGULLO HATES ALL OF YOU! EXCEPT THE FANGIRLS! EXCEPT THE WEIRD ONES!" With little other choice, El Orgullo stepped out of the ring.

"Better luck next time," Carla said, giggling loudly as she watched him leave.

* * *

Jimmy couldn't help but wonder who this strange hyena was and what she had done with Carla.

"I can't believe this," Sanchez huffed next to him. "Sure, the big hombre is a bit lacking in the brains department, but he's up against someone who hasn't stepped foot in the ring for months and a crippled rat! This is pathetic!"

"Yes, but they're fighting for noble causes like love and family," Jimmy said as if it were obvious. "And revenge, which is less so, but still kinda balances out in the end?"

" _At least 50/50,"_ Wallace agreed.

"Bah!" Sanchez brushed him aside. "El Orgullo has fame, fortune, and enticing lionesses to do all the merchandise-hunting for him. What greater motivation does he need than that?"

"Didn't you cut his pay last week?" Gomez asked.

"Our budget was tight and I needed more lights!" He shook his head. "No importa. If I need to rely on that strange bat to win, then I shall."

"Uh…" Jimmy frowned, wondering briefly if he should warn this self-professed scumbag of his impending doom. His heart didn't take long to make that decision for him. "You should know that she's most likely here to kill you."

"Oh, of course she is," he said dismissively. "That doesn't mean I can't still make use of her. On the flipside, if Carla beats her into a fine paste, I won't have to worry about that." He grinned confidentiality at the fox. "It's all about managing your resources, niño. Either way, I win."

"But you still bet on El Orgullo," Gomez reminded him.

" _Silencio!"_

* * *

_Match Time: 18:55_

Lucy strolled up to Carla, wings folded innocently behind her back. "Well, at least I still have  _someone_ who'll fall for my tricks," she teased.

Carla laughed for an uncomfortably long time. "Tricks are for kids, puta _._ Maybe you should fight someone your own size."

She slapped paws with Priscilla, who had a not-very-pleasant grin on her face as she wheeled herself into the ring oh-so-slowly, doing her best to up the suspense.

" _This sure is suspenseful!"_ Vole exclaimed.

Lucy must have taken offense to Carla's assertion about tricks and their proper audience, as for once she was in no mood for pageantry. She rushed up to Priscilla before she could blink and tipped her out of her wheelchair. "This! Is! For! The! Punch!" With each word, she kicked Priscilla hard in the chest, driving the wind out of her. "And this is for the punchbowl! Blame that damn rabbit!"

" _I have no idea what she's talkin' about, but apparently La Baronessa is_ also  _perfectly willin' to hit someone in a wheelchair."_

" _She'll go far in the business, Devin."_

" _Damn straight! It's touching to see a rookie with so much potential!"_

Lucy flew up, about to stomp down on Priscilla's ribcage, but found something weighing her down. Looking back, she found that Priscilla had caught her by the ankle and was dangling in the air below her. "Hey! That's a violation of my personal space, lady!" She kicked down at the dangling rat, barely getting a flinch out of her.

Gritting her teeth, Priscilla crawled up Lucy's torso. She swung a fist at the bat's face, narrowly missing, but putting the two almost face to face. "You are going to die for what you did to my family,  _bruja!"_

Lucy jerked her head forward, hitting Priscilla square in the nose. The little luchadora almost lost her grip, but not quite. She punched Lucy in the ribs, causing her to grunt in pain. Lucy kicked her back, then Priscilla bit her leg. From the audience's perspective, it was like watching two fuzzy orbs dancing in mid-air.

Vole squinted. " _I've heard of high-flying moves, but this is ridiculous!"_

" _Almost as ridiculous as you pretending to know wrestling lingo!"_

Lucy flew higher above the ring, trying to shake Priscilla off, but she just wouldn't budge. Looking down at her glowering face, Lucy saw the floor of the ring over her shoulder and got an idea. Instead of flying higher, she stopped flapping altogether, letting the two of them drop like stones.

Priscilla landed hard on her back, with Lucy on top of her. "If you miss your family so much, then why don't you  _join them?!"_ Before Priscilla could react, Lucy sank her fangs into her throat.

For a second, the crowd actually went silent. No one really knew what to say about what had just occurred. Even the referee seemed unsure if he should interfere. He looked like…well, a deer in the headlights. This silence was ended by the shocked cry of " _PRISCILLA!"_ from Carla.

Lucy looked up, her chin stained red, just in time to see a giant steel bat slam into her face and knock her away. Tossing the ironic weapon aside, Carla knelt over her mate. "Priscilla! Speak to me! Are you alright?!"

Priscilla sat up with a groan, covering the bite on her throat with a paw. "I'm fine…just…ow. Where is that…flapping whore?"

Carla glanced over her shoulder. She honestly hadn't cared much  _where_ Lucy landed, but she seemed to have crashed into one of the mobile lights used to illuminate the ring from the outside, as one was now broken. The bat herself was slowly crawling her way back through the ropes. Judging by the soot covering her and the wafting smoke, she'd gotten quite the nasty shock. The bat wheezed. "That...was…"

"Shocking?" Carla suggested.

"ELECTRIC?" Orgullo offered.

" _Charged?"_ Devin and Vole asked in unison.

"I…was gonna say painful…Imma go over here now." She very slowly flopped over to her corner.

Priscilla glared after her. "Aren't we going to stop her?"

To her surprise, Carla ignored the question. Instead, she moved Priscilla's hand away from the bite. "You're bleeding! That doesn't look good." Blood was seeping from the wound, staining Priscilla's fur red.

Priscilla coughed. "I can still fight. It's fine."

Carla gave her a skeptical look, but let it pass. "Come on. Let's go tag you out."

" _Hold on, let's back up a bit here. Did the Baroness actually_   _just suck her blood?!"_

" _She's a_ vampire  _bat, Vole."_

" _I thought that was just her gimmick!"_

Ignoring the obnoxious commentators and practically shoving the ref out of the way, Carla officially tagged out her woozy partner. That was  _way_ too close for comfort. Just that brief, helpless moment of seeing Priscilla in mortal peril brought on a special kind of despair Carla hadn't felt in years.

Or at least, it  _felt_ like years, but was actually not that long ago.

" _Annnnnnnd….GO!"_

_Carla took off running into the obstacle course, barely cognizant of the other cadets running with her. She was a few months into the Zootopia Police Academy now and things were going pretty well so far. Seriously, why did everyone say this was so hard?_

_She leapt into the air, grabbing onto the hanging bars and swinging across, knocking off a wolf who made the mistake of getting in her way. He fell and rolled the rest of the expanse, only to be stomped on as Carla stuck the dismount. What a wimp._

_Carla dove forward into the sand pit as the harsh winds blew at her. She crawled relentlessly over the hot surface until she bumped into the backside of a black bear stuck in the middle of the pit, gasping for water. She scrambled up and over his back, clawing him several times in the process, then springboarded off of him to reach the end. If you can't take the heat, get out of the ZPA._

_She braced herself and dug her claws into the ice wall, making her ascent quickly past a few other mammals struggling to climb. Unable to see the top once she got there, her paw reached up and grabbed the first hold she could find...which just so happened to be the tail of a mongoose. She yanked him off and completed the climb, hearing his screams as he fell onto the next mammal in line and knocking them all off in a domino effect, ending with some skinny arctic fox who had barely left the ground. Talk about a hopeless case._

_Before she knew it, Carla was sliding across the finish line. She jumped up and down, literally roaring in celebration._

" _HYENANDEZ!"_

_She stopped, looking over at the furious face of Major Ursula Friedkin. Once she stopped cheering, she could hear the groans and pleas for help from the many cadets she had left behind. She didn't get much time to think back on it before the polar bear physically dragged her off the field._

_Carla was flung into a chair in her office, roughly enough to nearly knock it over. Ursula sat down at her desk, glaring silently across the room at her. Even the hyena was a bit cowed by her intimidating presence, but not enough to keep her mouth shut. "So, uh, what is this about?"_

_The bear's fist slammed down onto the desk, rocking it violently. "You have to_ ask?!  _This is the third time this week you've injured another cadet!"_

" _I was just doing what I was supposed to do!" Carla argued. "It's not_ my  _fault the others can't keep up! After a couple months of hearing you yell 'You're dead!' at everyone, I kinda thought the idea was coming out_ alive!"

" _Not at the expense of your squadmates!" she countered. Seeing that Carla could easily match her in the yelling department, she calmed down slightly. "You realize that you're going to be part of a team, right? That everything you do is going to affect whoever you end up partnered with? Hell, I was thinking of sticking you with Cadet Frost."_

" _The arctic fox?!" she asked, horrified. "He won't last two seconds out there! Even that_ red  _fox is more capable!"_

" _But he at least knows how to support a team! Our job is to_ protect  _the weak, not trample over them! I'll ask you the same question I asked him, Hyenandez. What brought you to this academy?"_

_She tried hard to keep her face straight. "Someone I love was hurt because of my weakness. I joined so I could get justice for her."_

_The bear nodded. "That's about as vague as what Cadet Wilde told me, but I get it. Let me tell you though, I've seen enough revenge stories come through here to know how they end. You'll go into the force all gungho, bite off more than you can chew, rush off into battle, and then YOU'LL BE DEAD!" She paused a moment to let the echo of her voice reverberate. "Not just you, but everyone_ around  _you. Your mate deserves better than that."_

_Carla couldn't hide her shock. "I didn't say-!"_

" _I know. I can always tell." She smirked. "Do you know what your mate wants out of this? Because I can guarantee you that it isn't getting yourself killed in her name. What she wants is_ you.  _Just you."_

" _You don't know Priscilla," Carla growled._

" _No, but I know a tragedy waiting to happen. And I can't have that on my conscience." She leaned across the desk, keeping the hyena's eyes on her. "I want you to think for a long, hard while about what you need to be doing right now. Is this_ really  _the right path for you? If you're still feeling that way next year, I won't give you any more gripe about it."._

" _Next year?" Carla asked, suddenly uneasy. "What are you saying?!"_

 _Ursula sighed. "I'm saying that I'm terminating your application. I'm sorry, but I can't ignore these incidents any longer, especially now that I know why they're happening. The ZPD is a place of justice, not an outlet for the anger you're harboring." Carla snapped at her, fangs closing an inch from her nose. "That is_ not  _helping your case, missy! You'll thank me for this later! Over and out!" With a final salute, Ursula stood up abruptly and left the room._

_Surprisingly, Carla made no move to stop her. She was rooted to the spot, still trying to process what just happened. For the second time, in far too short of a time, she had failed Priscilla again._

Something inside of her snapped. She couldn't let anything else happen to her. Not now, not  _ever._

* * *

"Okay, something is  _seriously_ wrong with Carla now," Jimmy observed. "Not to alarm anyone, but I think it might be insanity."

"Oh,  _maldición!"_ Sanchez swore. "It's finally happened."

" _What's_  happened?"

The cat bowed his hat, looking much like he had just given up hope. "La Mala Perra has awoken completely."

* * *

_Match Time: 23: 23_

With two wounded mammals resting on the sidelines, Carla and El Orgullo stepped into the ring. "Only you and me left," Carla pointed out, not even looking at him. Her voice was completely monotone and her movements swayed as if she were being pulled by strings.

El Orgullo didn't care about any of this and sucker punched her, sending her to the mat. He ran to the ropes and springboarded into a flip, landing torso-first on top of her.

Devin cringed. " _Ohhhhhh, that was a mean Lionsault!"_

" _Emphasis on_ mean.  _Does this guy have any sense of honor?"_

" _If he did before, it's definitely been beaten out of him now. I'd say-oh hold on, I think he's about to gloat again."_

" _Ugh, he's barely letting us do our job."_

El Orgullo stood and struck a pose. "YES! HA HA! EL ORGULLO SHALL HAVE HIS REVENGE FOR HIS EARLIER HUMILIATION! HE WILL-OOMPH!"

Carla once again cut him off, this time by attempting to stick her head in his mouth...through his teeth. He stumbled back, hands over his mouth, actually stunned speechless by such a dangerous maneuver.

Unfortunately for El Orgullo, Carla was no longer Carla. The hyena's mind was slavering. The stress had finally gotten to her. Her heart beat in her chest like machine gun fire and her breath came in quick bursts, but on the outside, she looked like a kit on the last day of school, with the smile to match. "Eheeheeheehee! What's wrong, pretty kitty?! Can't take a  _joke?!"_

" _What's up with_ her?  _El Orgullo hit her head too hard on that last blow?"_ Vole asked.

" _It's more than that,"_ Devin answered, almost fearfully. " _She's back. La Mala Perra is finally back."_

Carla looked back and forth, her grin fading a little at the sight of the crowd around her. "C'mon, everyone! You know what time it is! Laugh with me! Ahahahahahahahahahahaha!" The lion barely made a move to stop her as she erupted into a chorus of high-pitched laughter that echoed across the ring. Soon, the rest of the audience was joining her, filling the place with more laughs than any comedy club could hope to top.

Jimmy shuddered. "I never thought I'd say it, but I think I liked Carla more  _without_  a sense of humor."

" _This shit is whack, yo!"_

"You're right, Wallace, she  _is_ pretty wacky."

"EL ORGULLO'S INSECURITIES LEAD HIM TO BELIEVE YOU ARE ALL LAUGHING AT HIM AND HE POLITELY REQUESTS THAT YOU STOP!"

She did, turning her head slowly towards him while still wearing that massive grin. "Sounds to me like we've got ourselves a real stick in the mud in need of a good laugh. Hope you're ready for the punchline!"

He frowned in confusion. "BUT YOU HAVEN'T TOLD A JO-OOOOF!" With blinding speed, Carla thrust herself off of the ropes and clotheslined El Orgullo in the throat as she crossed the ring.

"I don't need to. You're enough of a joke already! Kyaaaaahahahahahahaha!"

Vole shrugged. " _I gotta admit, that was actually pretty funny."_

" _Unless you want her doin' that to_ you  _next, you_ better  _laugh!"_

El Orgullo only started to get back up when he saw the grinning hyena standing over him. "You look tired. Have a  _seat!"_ She slammed a steel folding chair over his head, knocking him back into the ground. She could have taken this opportunity to pin him, but instead walked around back and grabbed him by the tail. "Hope you enjoyed my headliner, but the best is yet to come and I ain't lion!"

"EL ORGULLO FINDS THAT OFFENSIVE!"

He was even more offended when she started swinging him around in circles. "Well, if you don't like  _that_  one, how about something a little more  _topical?!"_ She threw him straight upwards so that he crashed into the lights on the ceiling, shooting sparks across the crowd like fireworks. "Now here's  _my_ catch phrase!" She leapt up and caught him as he fell back down. "Don't screw with my family!" Grabbing him by the neck with his head between her arms, Carla suplexed him into the mat, dusting her paws off afterward. "Oooooh, I think I might've  _bombed_ that one! Ahahahahaha!" By now, the audience was in stitches.

"This is incredible!" Jimmy said, shooting up out of his seat. "She's getting mammals to laugh at her o _n purpose!"_

"Let's segue into a different routine, after this beat!"

Carla grabbed the lion by his underwear, driving her knee into his gut. "That was for my family!" She wrapped her arms around his abdomen, suplexing him into a complete flip that knocked the breath from his lungs. "That was for my wife!" She grabbed him by the ankle and threw him into the ropes, launching into a spinning kick to his stomach as he bounced back. "That was for every other luchador who's had to put up with your crap!" El Orgullo was lying on his back, groaning. Carla cast a look at Priscilla over her shoulder, and the two shared a grin. "And  _this_ is for the crowd!"

The announcers looked at each other in confusion, but the audience seemed to know what was going on. They began a steady chant: "CCF! CCF! CCF!"

Vole looked at his card. " _Uh, that move isn't on the list."_

Jimmy looked to Sanchez, who curled his lip in disgust. "It is their team finisher; the Closed Casket Funeral."

" _Yeah, Vole! Don't you watch the classics?"_

" _You didn't recognize it either! Admit it!"_

" _Never!"_

Carla lifted El Orgullo onto her shoulders so that he was sitting like a child on their parent's shoulders, his legs on either side of her neck. Priscilla pulled herself onto the top turnbuckle, then over onto the top rope, bouncing slightly in anticipation. Carla turned so that both she and the still dazed El Orgullo faced Priscilla. "Are you ready,  _mi corazon?"_

Priscilla's voice was weak from blood loss, but her eyes were hard as steel. "Born ready,  _mi alma."_

Carla tagged Priscilla, who catapulted herself up into the air, somehow managed a frontflip, and plowed into El Orgullo's face. As she did this, Carla dropped back, slamming him into the mat. His skull struck ground with Priscilla's weight on his face. "EL ORGULLO...REGRETS _..._ his career decisions…" he said weakly as his vision faded to black.

Carla looked down on him with satisfaction. "Rest well and dream of large lionesses."

A tense silence overtook the crowd before, slowly, everyone looked to the referee expectantly. The elk waited a few seconds more before awkwardly looking back to a very disgruntled Sanchez.

"Just get it over with," he spat.

Finally, the ref slapped the ground. "Uno! Dos! Tres!"

The bell rang.

The audience erupted into cheers.

* * *

_Fracaso Felino_

_7:31 PM_

_Match End_

" _Incredible!"_ Devin announced, standing up in his seat. " _This is why you don't dismiss the classics, folks! Our winners, back on the top again, are La Niñita and La Mala Perra!"_

" _I don't know about you, but that one really started to drag towards the end. When do we get paid again?"_ Vole asked.

"Yes! She did it!" Jimmy shouted, doing a perfect jumping fist pump to demonstrate his excitement.

" _Suck it, Sanchez!"_

"Wallace!" Jimmy scolded, looking sheepishly at the feline. "Sorry, sir."

"I must sing for you a song of unyielding rage," he said to no one in particular, drawing his violin.

What followed was a long string of caterwauling at the top of his lungs, loud enough to drown out the entire audience and bring everyone's' attention to him. "There. I feel better now."

"So do I," Priscilla said, smirking as she hopped off of the unconscious El Orgullo. "Seriously, revenge is underrated. I may not approve of your methods, but...thank you, Carla." She tilted her head forward, openly requesting a grand affectionate gesture in return. As the last vestiges of the La Mala Perra persona slipped away, Carla leaned down to give her a quick peck on the cheek. Priscilla was unimpressed. "...That's it?"

Strangely enough, Carla seemed more anxious than ever. "Great! We won! You should go home now."

"What?!" Priscilla screamed in shock. "You're  _still_ trying to get rid of me?! Okay, that's it! You said I'd get an explanation after the match, so I'm holding you to that promise! You're going to tell me...exactly...what's been...going...on…"

Between the physical exertion and the emotional outburst, the lack of blood finally took its toll on Priscilla. The rat tumbled out of her chair into a lump of lucha on the floor. Carla breathed a sigh of relief, leaning down to scoop her up. "I'm sorry, mi corazon, but explanations will have to wait. Hey, Frost!"

The fox stopped cheering for just a moment. "Yeah?"

"Catch!" Carla tossed her unconscious mate towards him. He, or rather Wallace, caught her in his arms. "Get her back home and into bed! She'll be fine, but she needs rest!"

"O-Okay, I…"

"Now wait just a second here!" Sanchez brushed past Jimmy and scrambled up into the ring. "You think that after this public humiliation, you're going to just walk out of here?!"

"No," Carla said, her tone suddenly cold and serious. "No, I don't. And neither are you."

"Porque?"

"NOW!"

A low rumbling overtook the room, making the audience quiet down as they too wondered what was going on. Their answer came when a set of thick metal bars slid up from hidden slots in the floor and surrounded the ring, coming together to form a cage over Carla and Sanchez and trapping them inside. But only Sanchez looked worried. "What is this?! I didn't authorize a cage match! More to the point, the fight is  _over_ , you imbécils!"

In response, the announcers could only shrug.

" _Sorry, Jefe."_

" _It wasn't us."_

Jimmy had been about to make his exit, but the sudden turn of events stopped him as well. He was nearly bowled over as Gomez came rushing past him, banging on the cage and yelling incoherently. The fox started to grow concerned now. "Carla? What's going on here?"

"I told you to leave!"

"I know...but…"

"Finally…" Behind Carla, he could see the charred form of Lucy Sang fly haphazardly through the bars and back into the ring. "You didn't have to hit me so hard, you know."

"Carla, watch out!" Jimmy shouted.

But Carla barely moved, just glaring back at the bat contemptuously. "And  _you_ didn't have to drink my mate!"

"Touché. If it makes you feel any better, she wasn't even that good."

"Why would that make me feel better?!"

"Because I got fried by a giant light bulb and didn't even get a decent meal out of it?"

After a few seconds contemplating this, Carla turned away again. "Just to be clear, I  _do_ actually hate you."

"That's nothing new."

Jimmy, Sanchez,Gomez, and nearly the entire rest of the audience watched this exchange with increasing confusion. Having heard enough, Sanchez finally stepped forward. "Now listen here,  _dear_ Carla, I don't know what you're trying to pull, but you let me out of here this-!"

Carla reached for him, making the feline flinch, but all she grabbed was his spare violin. Sanchez rolled his eyes. "Oh, sure! If you want to break my things again, go right ahead! My violin, she can be replaced,  _much like you!"_

Without a word, Carla lifted the violin and slammed it downwards, shattering the instrument to pieces.

Over Sanchez's head.

The cat yelped in surprise, collapsing to the floor instantly. The effect this had on the audience was just as immediate, with one half cheering and the other half calling for her blood. The two sides quickly came into conflict with each other and stated rioting in the stands like true sports enthusiasts, fur, weapons and musical instruments flying every which way. Only Gomez remained ringside, incensed beyond reason as he attempted to physically pry the bars apart.

" _Wow! Talk about striking a chord! What do you think about this latest development, Vole?"_

" _I think it's time for us to go back into retirement, Devin!"_

" _I think you're absolutely right!"_

Both announcers promptly ran off in opposite directions.

"Ooooh, mi cabeza…" Sanchez groaned as he climbed back to his knees. "How dare you-!"

"The handle's still intact," Carla pointed out, then struck him again with it.

Jimmy slipped out of the chaos and ran up as close as he could to the bars, once again ignoring her orders to leave. "Carla, what are you doing?! I get that you want revenge, but this is going too far!"

Carla ignored  _him_  just as easily, keeping her cold eyes on Sanchez. There was an intensity in them that Jimmy had never seen before, and it frightened him. Lucy hovered even closer now without Carla so much as acknowledging her. "Well, well, it looks like your time has come, Carla." She smirked knowingly. "Or should I call you  _Joker?"_

Still holding the spent violin, Carla lifted Sanchez up by the scruff of his neck. This was exactly what she'd been waiting for.

_This was exactly what she'd been waiting for, and she blew it._

_Carla sat down at the bus stop, back in her black jacket and jeans after her short-lived journey in ZPA cadet clothes. She didn't even make it to a full uniform before they kicked her to the curb._

_How long would the familia remind her of this failure? Probably not as long as she'd remind_ herself.  _La Mala Perra, the Slayer of Giants, Laughter of Death, Dropper of Balls. Nothing to do now but head back home with her tail tucked between her legs and try to explain this to Priscilla._

" _Hey, stop me if you've heard this one before. What do you call a hyena in a storage closet?"_

 _Carla scowled. She was_ seriously  _not in the mood for this. That didn't seem to matter to the sharply-dressed fox who sat down next to her, tapping a garish cane against the ground. He grinned widely at her, giving his joke an appropriate pause before, "A laughing stock!"_

" _I've heard better," she said shortly, turning around and hoping he'd get the hint to go away._

_He did not. "Someone's a bit grouchy today." No shit. "I guess I can't blame you. Having your hopes and dreams mercilessly crushed like roadkill under a steamroller will do that."_

_A growl started to rise from the back of her throat. "Is there something you_ want _, Mr….?"_

" _Reynard. Count Reynard._ Mr.  _Count Reynard. Pleased to meetcha." He extended a paw._

_Carla ignored it. "That's a dumb name."_

" _This coming from 'La Mala Perra'? Let's not alias-shame here, Carla."_

_She slapped the lingering paw away. "How do you know my name...s?!"_

_"I've been keeping an eye on this year's batch of vic-cadets from the academy. Not like I'm some creepy stalker or something. One of them is my son."_

" _Riiiiiiiiight…" she said skeptically. Though come to think of it, he_ did  _bear some resemblance to Cadet Wilde. "You couldn't just get a visitor's pass and say hi?"_

" _That would be...awkward. I haven't seen him in over twenty years."_

" _You must be a pretty shitty father then."_

" _Can't argue that." And yet he was all smiles about it. "I want to keep an eye on him, but mine are going with age. I need someone young and fresh on the inside. That's where you lucky cadets come in."_

" _Are you_ sure  _you're not some creepy stalker?" Carla shook her head in disgust. "Anyway, you're yiffing up the wrong tree, fox boy. In case you've forgotten, I'm not a cadet anymore."_

 _He was completely unphased. And Carla thought_ she  _had a good Poker face. "True, but it need not be for long. See, I've got what you might call 'connections' and 'charisma' and 'coercion' and ignore that last one. Point is, you wanna be a cop, I can make you a cop. Not that I see the appeal in it myself, but hey, I won't judge."_

" _You really think I'm gonna take an offer like that?!" she snapped, silencing the tiny voice in her head before it could say otherwise. "Obvious shadiness aside, I have better things to do than babysit your brat!"_

" _What, like grovel to your mate?" Her hackles raised. "I mean, you wouldn't have to do anything like that! I'll just pull some strings and get the two of you on the same squad, as part of some 'rookie training program' or something. Oh, and I'll throw in Cadet Frosty too just so the big bear doesn't get suspicious. Personally, I think you'll make a_ great  _team."_

" _Wow, you still think I'm gonna go along with this," she said dryly, not even having the energy to stay mad anymore. "You might wanna work on your sales pitch, because the only thing you've persuaded me to do is find a different bus stop. Adios." Sweeping her tail in a way that deliberately whacked him across the face, Carla walked away._

" _Wait! What about your ZPD training?" Reynard called after her._

_She kept walking. "I'll come back next year! If you're so knowledgeable, I assume you don't need me to explain that!"_

_He laughed to himself, under his breath, but_ just  _loud enough for her to hear. "Yeah, I'd like to see you_ last  _that long."_

 _Carla stopped._ "Excuse  _me?"_

 _Reynard paused, looking at her like he was actually surprised and frightened she had overheard. "Well, I just meant that you'll have to put up with a_ whole year  _of living with your failure. That can't be easy for anyone."_

 _She glared over her shoulder. "I know you think I'm just some dumb musculosa_ ,  _but I see what you're trying to pull. Priscilla will forgive me. And if she doesn't, I deserve it anyway." She started walking again._

" _Maybe she will," Reynard agreed. "But you're not thinking of the_ consequences,  _I'm afraid! For the next year, Sandcat Sanchez will continue to exploit the fighters under him, making a mockery out of the lucha code and everything it stands for! Your entire family will continue to suffer under his control, all because of your failure to stop him when you had the chance! if I didn't know any better, I'd wonder just how much you_ really  _care about them if you're not willing to take any chance to-!"_

 _Someone might as well have rung a bell for how quickly Carla tackled him to the ground and put him in a headlock. "What, you think I'm_ weak,  _is that it?!"_

 _Reynard gasped, dropping his cane as he struggled to breathe. "No...gack...but if_ I  _can...urk...provoke you so easily...agh...what will_ Sanchez  _do?"_

_Carla loosened her grip, if only so she didn't have to wait so long for him to make a point. "Explain!"_

" _Your fiery passion is your greatest strength, but also your greatest weakness. Sanchez will exploit that, take every opportunity to try and set you off, until you finally snap. And when you do, he'll_ ruin  _you. You, and everyone you've ever cared about. Tell me I'm wrong, Carla! Tell me that won't happen! Tell me you'll be able to live with this for another_ year!"

_She couldn't. As much as she wanted to say just that, she couldn't. She couldn't put them all in danger because of her. "...Dammit!" She dropped him to the ground._

_Reynard climbed to his knees and coughed, rubbing at his throat. "I hope this doesn't become a trend…"_

" _You can really get me through the academy?" Carla asked, that same fiery passion now completely gone. She stared off into space, wondering if she was really doing this._

" _I'll do you one better," he smiled, getting back to his feet. "I'll personally guarantee you a shot at Sanchez, free of charge."_

" _And all I have to do is...watch your son?"_

" _Yep. You won't even have to report to me. Just keep him in your sights at all times and make sure nothing goes wrong."_

" _Then...I…"_

 _They both looked up as a large bus came over the horizon, approaching the stop. Reynard stepped in front of her. "You didn't like my_ last  _joke, so let's try another one. I'll even let you supply the punchline." He cleared his throat dramatically. "A fox and a hyena walk up to a bus stop. Both are pining for someone special, but need to take big risks to get to them. Seeing this common ground, the fox extends a gracious offer to the hyena and the hyena says…" He did a pirouette and extended his paw expectantly._

_This time she took it, ignoring the bus as it moved on by. "Fine. Just shut up already."_

_Reynard frowned, taking his paw back. "Okay,_ I'll  _come up with the punchline." He did the pirouette again and reached out to grab her paw, smiling wickedly._

" _Welcome to the ZPD, 'Officer' Hyenandez."_

Sanchez screamed as he was thrown through the air and into the bars, losing his sombrero and flopping pitifully to the floor. Seeing this, Gomez worked even harder, starting to make real headway bending the bars. Showing little concern, Carla walked slowly towards the downed Sanchez, her face deceptively neutral.

Jimmy took a step back, a powerful sense of dread keeping him from running now even if he wanted to. " _Joker?_  What does that mean? Carla? Carla, answer me!"

Carla ignored him, but Lucy was all too happy to answer. "What, haven't you ever stopped to wonder how the Count's been one step ahead of you guys this whole time? He likes to pretend he's some omniscient god, but the truth is much simpler. He's had a mole in your team from Day 1: your good buddy, Carla Hyenandez!"

The audience gasped, apparently still thinking this was part of the show even as they kept pummeling each other. Jimmy was too horrified to even get out that much. "What?! No! No way! That's ridiculous! Carla would never do something like that! Carla, why won't you look at me?!"

The hyena kept her head turned away, refusing to make eye contact, but still continuing her approach. Lucy kept speaking for her, obviously relishing in the pain she was causing. "Need some proof? Take a closer look at that badge she gave you, particularly around the 'i'."

Jimmy reluctantly did so, admonishing himself for giving such a horrible lie this much credence and doubting a valued teammate. At least until he saw the camera. It was extremely small, enough to fit right over the dot in the 'i', but it was definitely there, staring back at him mockingly. But he remained skeptical, or perhaps just naively optimistic. "A-Anyone could've put that there."

Lucy rolled her eyes. "Oh, for crying out-here!" She flew across the ring in a heartbeat, thrusting a cell phone into Jimmy's face.

The sight of it finally got Carla's attention, but her reaction was more frightened than angry. "You stole my phone?!"

"Sorry, it's become a habit. Anyway, take a look at this!" Lucy tapped her claw on the screen a few times, then showed him a text from "Wilde".

It wasn't Nick.

_Hey, Joker. It's me, Reynard. You know, Count Reynard? The Count? The guy you work for? :D_

_Anyhoo, I've got a status update. I think the Sanchez here at the hotel is a big fat faker. He didn't smell of any kind of cologne like the one I saw you complain about. Remember, through that fancy spy badge I had you wear? Totally wouldn't have been able to tell the difference without that._

_So here's what you're gonna do: as soon as you see the real Sanchez, call him out to a big fight in the ring under the hotel. Everyone knows you've got a hate boner for the guy, so it's not gonna look that suspicious. But in case you have any trouble, your fellow associate Queen of Diamonds will be there to help you out. Sorta. Still got a cover to maintain, after all. Once you win the match and get Sanchez within your grasp, just give a signal for my guys to drop the cage down on ya. Then you'll finally have your long-awaited revenge, so long as you don't try to chicken out of it, of course. That would be bad for everyone involved, especially your family._

_But I know you won't have any problems. You've been such a wonderful mole, Joker. The way you sabotaged your own attempt to snag Ace on Outback then let him get away. The way you followed Nicholas around the Rainforest District so I could impersonate him perfectly through those fake texts. Oh, and my favorite part, the way you stole that evidence on Finnick and then framed Nicholas for it! Man, it's a good thing that arctic fox friend of yours won't ever see this, cause' I bet he'd be PISSED! XD_

_Well, my son just showed up, so I'll stop rambling in such oddly-specific detail now. You go do your job as the BEST MOLE EVA and give music boy his final crescendo!_

_P.S. Nicholas helped me spell that word. Isn't he such a good boy? I have only the highest of hopes about how this meeting is going to go!_

And then there was a fox emoji next to a thumbs up emoji.

"Don't worry, he's that long-winded in  _all_ of his texts," Lucy said. "But when he sends stuff like that, I have to wonder if maybe he  _is_ a bit omniscient."

Gomez got the bars just far enough apart to stick his head through. "That's pretty messed up."

Carla, who had one foot planted over Sanchez, couldn't do much more than stare at Jimmy helplessly. "Frost...Jimmy, I-"

"Shut up! Just shut up!" he snapped back as harshly as he was used to receiving. "All this time,  _all this time,_  that I've trusted you and tried to help you, and you've just been playing all of us for fools?!" Ignoring the smug and satisfied look on Lucy's face, he kept ranting at Carla, equal parts enraged and devastated beyond measure. "You gave me that big pep talk when I was depressed about betraying Lady Lang, but  _you're_ the reason she's dead! You helped the Count trick me, knowing all along what he was planning, then had the gall to pretend like you cared about me! And what about Nick, huh?! You act like he's some criminal scum, but at least  _he_ doesn't sell out his friends! Or his own family! Carla Hyenandez, you are...not a very good person!" He capped off his sobbing speech by ripping the fake badge out of Wallace's grip and throwing it as hard as he could onto the ground.

It didn't break, but the camera did.

* * *

_Inside the Countmobile_

_7:40 PM_

The TV cut to static. "What?! No! NO!" Reynard screamed, throwing his popcorn at the screen in a vain attempt to bring his free entertainment back. "Right when it was getting good! You can't just leave me on a cliffhanger for who knows how long!"

Snarling, he grabbed his cane and swung the headpiece as hard as he could into the screen. That's not how you treat your fans, dammit!"

* * *

_Fracaso Felino_

_7: 41 PM_

Sanchez was starting to recover his senses when Carla stomped hard onto his chest, keeping him almost effortlessly on the floor. It was a convenient way to avoid acknowledging Jimmy's loud and angry monologue, but she couldn't avoid it forever. "Why do you think I didn't want you to come? I was trying to protect both of you from this."

" _Were_ you?" Jimmy asked coldly. "Or were you just trying to hide your own shame? I never thought you were such a  _coward!"_ Several audience members let out an 'ooooooh!' in response.

Carla herself didn't even respond, let alone with the furious indignation he expected. It was hard to tell exactly  _what_ she was thinking when her expression was almost unreadable under the mask. But she did finally look at the fox, no longer capable of ignoring him no matter how much she wanted to. "You're right." That was about the  _last_ answer he expected, throwing him off just slightly. "As strong as I like to think to I am, the thought of Priscilla or mi familia finding out about this petrified me. As soon as I graduated with that fraudulent badge, I shut myself away, too scared to face any of them with what I'd done. Heh. I'm the  _real_  joke here."

In one move, she reached up and tore the mask from her face, drawing gasps from the many lucha fans in the crowd. Her face was of one trying very hard not to break down, but rapidly losing that battle. "And yet I took it all out on Nick Wilde! Every time I saw his face, all I saw was his father mocking me, looking down on me for taking his lousy deal! He was such a manipulative monster, how could I ever think his  _son_  was any different?!" She sighed. "But he is. Better than him, better than me. I really do hate criminals, you know, and I'm the worst criminal of all."

Jimmy was silent, still glaring at the hyena, but no longer having anything else to throw at her. Lucy looked back and forth between them, waiting for the fight to continue, but that was the end of it. "Ugh, way to suck all the fun out of it, Joker."

From beneath Carla's boot, Sanchez growled. "Feeling guilty, señorita? Maybe I'll help you write a song about it…" His paw shot out from under his poncho, wielding a knife. "... _en_   _el infierno!"_

Even as distracted as she was, Carla reacted instantly, stomping on his paw with her other boot hard enough to cause an audible crack. Sanchez screeched as Carla lifted him by that same paw and slammed him into the bars, pressing his whiskered face partially through them. The sight was enough to make Jimmy take a few more steps back. "C-Carla? What are you doing?!"

"Finishing the job." With her other paw, she removed one of the strings from what was left of his violin and wrapped it around his throat, strangling the cat slowly. "If I don't, then everything I've done, all the mammals I've hurt, will have been for  _nothing._  I have to do this."

"No, you don't!" the fox yelled. "Just let me bring you back to the ZPD, Carla! We can figure this out, I promise!"

Sanchez writhed and gasped, turning paler by the second. Carla smiled, in an unnervingly friendly way given the situation. "You're a good kit, Jim. Thanks for all the laughs, even if I didn't show it."

Jimmy stared back in horror, feeling helpless to do anything to stop this. Even Gomez's attempt to get through the bars was stopped by Reynard's gang dragging him back into their brawl, only able to watch what came next. Sanchez's eyes were nearly bugging out of his skull as his struggles grew weaker and weaker.

No...there was still  _one_  thing he could do. Almost without thinking, Jimmy drew his ZPD tranq pistol and trained it on Carla. "Drop him. You're under arrest."

Carla didn't drop him, or even acknowledge that she'd heard him. She just kept squeezing him tighter and tighter until...

Sanchez let out a choked whimper, a sound far more audible than Jimmy expected, then abruptly went limp in Carla's arms. The fox started to tear up again, lowering his gun. "Carla...why?"

The hyena gasped, stepping back and dropping Sanchez on the spot. Her reaction seemed unusual to say the least after just murdering him.

Then he saw the knife in his back, the very same knife Sanchez had tried to attack her with. There was no question now that Sandcat Sanchez was dead, nor was it particularly hard to guess the culprit. "What?" Lucy asked, casually licking some blood splatter off her lips. "I was just doing you a favor. That was taking forever."

"I would've done it…" Carla said quietly.

"No, I don't think you would've," she replied matter-of-factly. "I can always tell real killers from the fakers and you were  _way_ overselling it. But that's okay." She flew up into Carla's face, grinning. "You'll get used to it."

Their voices came through much clearer than before, and Jimmy soon realized that was because the rest of the room had suddenly gone quiet. The forces of Reynard and Sanchez, many of them in the midst of beating each other senseless, stopped what they were doing and focused their attention on Sandcat's corpse. Slowly, they looked back at each other, not quite sure what to do now.

Lucy took advantage of the silence and swooped up through the top of the cage, spreading her wings and voice wide for the crowd. "Listen up, losers! And yes, I'm talking to Sanchez's boys because your days of parroting lousy music are over! Your boss is dead, and as soon as the cops realize that, they'll be down here to renegotiate your previous arrangement! The choice is yours: join up with the Count for a celebratory  _fiesta,_ or go down with this sinking ship!" She winked at them. "And I've been told that cats don't like water."

Gomez roared, throwing his distracted assailants aside and brushing down what was left of his tattered matador uniform as he stomped towards her. "You think it's that  _simple?!_ We've dedicated our  _lives_ to Jefe! We won't turn on him so easily!"

Jimmy was inclined to agree, at least until he saw the former Sanchez mooks ditching their gear en masse and shaking paws with the suited fellows they were fighting with less than a minute ago. He was stunned. After the undying loyalty he'd seen from Lady Lang's "children", the utter indifference these mammals showed was nothing short of astounding, and that was  _before_ they sent a hail of musical instruments flying at Gomez. The steer let out a moo of betrayal as he was buried in a sea of wood and brass.

"Yeah, funny thing about the music industry," Lucy giggled. "As soon as one band breaks up, the fans just jump onto the new biggest thing. Guess you're just a one-hit wonder after all!"

"Hey! Enough games!" Carla shouted up at her. "Let me out of here already!"

"What, so you can run on back to the ZPD and spill everything about us? I don't think so." Lucy slipped back through the bars, hanging upside-down from one of them as she smiled cruelly down at the hyena. "We'll bring you home to your  _new_ family to prove your loyalty. Until then, you can stay in your cage like the trained attack dog you are."

Biting her lip, Carla looked out at the increasingly-nervous Jimmy, still holding tight to Priscilla. He looked back, and while she saw sympathy on his expression, she also saw a clear tinge of "You reap what you sow".

She didn't particularly disagree. "Alright, then just let  _them_ go. They have nothing to do with this."

"You mean  _aside_ from being obvious leverage against you?" The bat cupped her hands to her lips and yelled, "Fifty points to whoever grabs the fox and rat!"

She cackled and pulled herself back through the bars to avoid Carla's enraged swipe. The hyena saw the crowd of newly-formed suits approaching the petrified Jimmy and shifted her priorities. " _Run, idiota!"_

To his credit, Jimmy reacted quickly, raising his tranq gun and popping darts into the first few crooks that came for him. They dropped like flies, but this did little to deter the others, who simply climbed over their immobilized comrades and lunged for him. Jimmy was thankful to be so small and scrawny for once, slipping through the arms of much larger mammals who came at him from every side. "Do you guys even know what those fifty points are  _for?!"_

They all paused, murmuring to each other in uncertainty before they looked up at Lucy. "They can be exchanged for snacks, prizes, or Batcoin, a digital form of currency for my eventual new world order," she answered.

"Yeah,  _that!"_ a tiger yelled, and then they were on him again. It wasn't even enough of a distraction to get him out of there as he soon found himself surrounded, his back pressed against the ring. He clutched Wallace and Priscilla tightly to himself and brandished his tranq gun as threateningly as he could manage.

" _It's out of ammo!"_

"Don't you betray me too, Wallace!"

"Out of the way!" a much fiercer voice demanded. Jimmy was so startled that he dropped the gun and instinctively ducked, which worked out pretty well for him as the massive body of El Orgullo came crashing through the metal bars and onto the crowd of criminals. Carla leapt through the gap and landed on his furry back, also landing on the dozen or so mammals he'd crushed by extension. She spread her arms and roared at the mob. " _NO PASARÃS!"_

They were still trying to process the flying lion when Carla attacked, spreading the gospel of La Mala Perra to all who would hear it. Jimmy understood what she was trying to do without her having to scream at him again, and he wouldn't let it go to waste. "Gracias," was all he said before booking it out of the arena, ferrying Priscilla (and Wallace) to safety.

" _She wasn't such a jerkface in the end, huh?"_

Jimmy swallowed a lump in his throat. "No...I guess she wasn't."

Lucy almost considered going after them, but decided against it. The ZPD would find out about Carla's treachery sooner or later; this way just made things more interesting. Besides, Carla herself wasn't going anywhere...not anywhere she'd  _like_ at least.

The battle went on for another few minutes, but while the hyena took down many of their thugs, some for potentially months of recovery, superior numbers finally got the better of her. At Lucy's command, they backed away from the battered and beaten Carla Hyenandez, who looked like she had been through several layers of Hell. Grabbing a stunt cable from the ceiling, the bat swooped down next to the luchadora and lightly kicked her in the head. She didn't lose a leg for the effort, which meant she was probably good to go. "Tsk tsk tsk, you've really had a rough night, huh? But look on the bright side. You got your revenge, your friends and family are safe, and now you've got an even  _bigger_  crowd to please."

The confused mooks just gave the freaky bat her space as she attached the stunt cable to the back of Carla's tights, then hopped onto it. "Good night, everybody!" She tugged on the cable, which whirred and activated, pulling both Lucy and Carla up through a hole in the ceiling.

Everyone else just stared up at that hole until someone shouted, "Fiesta time!" After which, the more disturbing elements of tonight were quickly forgotten.

* * *

_Inside the Countmobile_

_7: 46 PM_

There was a knock on the side of the limousine. "Uh...Count Reynard?" Koslov's voice asked warily. "Is something the matter? I heard you may be distressed."

"They just canceled  _iCarla!"_

"I see." It was clear by the tone of his voice that he did not see. "Is there anything else I can get for you?"

"No," he replied, scowling as he fell back into his seat. After a few more seconds of heaving out the rest of his angry outburst, a very solemn Reynard was left. "In fact, I think I need a change of scenery altogether. Keep the wolves working, Icebox. There's someone I sorely need to visit. Maybe then I can sort out what's going on with my brain right now. If this keeps up, I'm gonna go crazy, and  _not_  in a good way!"

"Affirmative, sir. Good luck." Among all of Koslov's positive traits as a henchmammal, his brevity was one of the finest. Without any more hassle, Reynard hopped into the front seat of the Countmobile and started it up, speeding off towards a destination only he knew.

But not before taking a second to pull the list of Zootopia's biggest crime lords from his pocket and cross one more name off of it. His show might have been taken off the air early, but he could predict the ending anyway.

~~Big~~

~~Thornbrush~~

 

~~Lang~~

~~Sanchez~~

Narwhalter

Only one more to go. Whoop dee freaking do

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two years, three months, and thirteen days since we started this monster. Talk about a long-simmering plot twist. Believe it or not, Carla Hyenandez was intended from the moment of her conception to be Count Reynard's mole in the ZPD. Hell, we knew she'd be a mole before we even knew she'd be a luchadora, or that she'd have a crippled rat for a mate.
> 
> And, well, that's where this idea got a bit more complicated. You see, Carla was originally planned to be a straight-up villain, and quite possibly Reynard's biggest supporter at that, but that's the thing about writing a character for so long before getting to the pivotal moment of "the twist". After the narrative has led us to give her all of this backstory and unexpected character depth, it suddenly got a lot harder to say that she'd just been evil all along. That's why we ended up going the tragic villain route instead. Honestly, the people who hate her probably still hate her, if not more, but at least now you understand why she is the way she is. Whether or not you care is a different story. :P
> 
> Oh, and in true BerserkMind fashion, there was a metric shit-ton of foreshadowing for all of this, as early as Carla's first scene in Chapter 5. We'll add it to the TV Tropes page at some point.
> 
> Irwin "The Devil" Devin is loosely based off of wrestling commentator Peter Senercia, also known as Tazz. Michael Vole is more obviously based off of Michael Cole. Both are owned by Mind Jack.
> 
> Still not many answers to the reader question about ringtones for characters. Either that wasn't a very good one or you people are just getting too distracted by all this shit we keep throwing at you. But here's your answers anyway:
> 
> DrummerMax64: "Wild Thing" or "Walk on the Wild Side" for Nick, "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun" or "What I Like About You" for Judy, "Livin' la Vida Loca" or "Macarena" for Carla, "It's a Small World" or "Tubthumping" for Frost, and "Trogdor" or "The Number of the Beast" for Finnick.
> 
> SozyFox: "Believer" for Judy.
> 
> Master Fearless Shadow: A whole bunch you didn't actually assign, but here they are regardless. I definitely see how some could fit, especially THE CHAIN for Nick.
> 
> 1\. THE CHAIN • Fleetwood Mac
> 
> 2\. "Wham Bam Shang-A-Lang" • Silver
> 
> 3\. Longview • Green Day
> 
> 4\. Midnight City • M83
> 
> 5\. Walking On A Dream • Empire Of The Sun
> 
> 6\. Smooth Criminal • Michael Jackson
> 
> 7\. Wye Oak • Civilian
> 
> 8\. Twisted Truth • Project RnL
> 
> 9\. Go Back • Tony Allen & Damon Albarn
> 
> 10\. The Bravest Man in the Universe • Bobby Womack (ft Damon Albarn)
> 
> 11\. Stylo • Gotillaz
> 
> 12\. They Don't Really Care About Us • Michael Jackson
> 
> 13\. The Silent Comedy • Bartholomew
> 
> 14\. Phenomenon • A Thousand Foot Krutch
> 
> 15\. You're Gonna Leave • Stephen Marley
> 
> 16\. I'm Not Afraid • Eminem
> 
> 17\. Paranoid • Black Sabbath
> 
> 18\. Welcome to the World of the Plastic Beach • Gorillaz ft. Snoop Dogg
> 
> 19\. Maria Maria • Santana
> 
> 20\. El Manana • Gorillaz
> 
> All brilliant choices and good job actually answering twice, Drummer. I hope you noticed the line we added just for you. ;)
> 
> Final note, but perhaps the most significant of all: Born to Be Wilde is soon to no longer be FFN exclusive. Starting tomorrow, we are going to begin the painful process of porting the fic over to A03 in its entirety. During which, we intend to comb over each and every chapter once again to root out any errors that somehow slipped past us and our betas the first 3-4 times (and yes, we've spotted some). Now that the fic is about to make a resurgence, the timing seems appropriate. (A03 Disclaimer: Pretty sure you know all that by now. But if you're reading this, congrats, you're all caught up!) 
> 
> (Actual final note.) Credit to LapisLucius42 for the name Packlov


	24. Rats, Raccoons, and Reynard, Oh My!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As of this update, the entirety of BtBW has now been ported to A03. Special thanks to all of you who supported us here and helped to ease the transition. That means this chapter will be the first to be uploaded to both sites at the same time. No more playing catch-up, A03 peeps! Now we're all on the same page!
> 
> And what a page to leave off on. As the Sanchez arc finally comes to a close, we prepare to move on to the last crime lord on Reynard's list, and the one people seem the most curious about. But first, one of those intermissions you all love so much. Hey, maybe even this feels like a breath of fresh air by now.

****

**Chapter 24: Rats, Raccoons, and Reynard, Oh My!**

_Sahara Square_

_8: 19 PM_

Jimmy Frost ran as fast as his little legs could carry him, which was an impressive speed for carrying a stuffed wallaby and an unconscious rat with him, but otherwise...well, actually, it was a bit sad how much they were weighing him down. But for a neurotic weakling who had made it onto the force primarily through book smarts and sheer willpower, he was running at a semi-decent pace. Good thing no one was actually coming after him though.

He realized this fact soon after making it back up to the main floor of the hotel, where the police presence was noticeably lacking. He considered trying to get some backup to deal with the situation downstairs, but decided against it for several reasons that mainly boiled down to "I can't trust anyone anymore." If even Nick and Carla could lie straight to his face, regardless of their motives, how could he believe any of these Precinct 2 cops to not be secretly working for Sanchez or Reynard or some other bad dude that no one had bothered to tell him about yet? If he was going to get Priscilla back to safety, he was going to have to do it on his own.

" _Let's blow this pawpsicle stand!"_

With Wallace.

That resolve gave out on him soon after his legs did a few blocks away, which was why he was now on a dingy bus avoiding stares from passengers. "She's just sleeping," he said of the limp rat, which was technically true, but got him even more stares.

By the time he got off in the New Mexicow sub-district, it started to occur to him that he really had no idea how he was going to handle the awkward questions once he actually made it back and had to face Elizabeth again. "Don't worry, your daughter almost got eaten by a vampire bat, but she should be fine now. Where's Carla? Oh yeah, she turned out to actually be working for the bad guys this whole time and that's why she never bothered to visit you. Sorry about that."

" _Sounds good! Let's go with that!"_

"No! Geez, Wallace, you have even worse social skills than I do."

" _And who's fault is that? You keep coddling me!"_

"Guess you have a point there."

" _Of course I do. Now will you stop sweating all over me?"_

"It's hot out here," he said meekly. "Also, I'm terrified. Seriously, we need to figure out what we're going to tell the Rodentriguez's."

" _No need to worry about that."_

"Why not?"

" _Because we're already there."_

Jimmy froze on the spot, realizing that his feet had subconsciously taken him right to their doorstep while he was busy arguing with the plushie. "Eep! O-Okay, maybe I could just ring the doorbell and leave her here. That'll be fine, right?"

Several voices came from inside. "Hey, did you hear that?

"Si, it sounded like someone loudly talking to themselves."

"I smell fear and emotional distress."

Panicking, Jimmy placed Priscilla gently on the doormat and ran for it, hiding behind a nearby, very festive mailbox.

" _Coward."_

"What? You've seen how that family acts. They'll tear me apart," he whispered.

Wallace glared accusingly at him through those adorable, beady eyes. " _That's no excuse to leave them in the dark! They just lost their adopted daughter again tonight and you don't even have the guts to tell them why?!"_

"It's not that! I...I just…"

" _You're afraid that they'll judge you for letting this happen. That they'll think less of you as a mammal. I bet that's exactly what Nick and Carla thought too when they were lying to us. Maybe it's time someone around here actually came clean for once."_

Jimmy sighed, pressing his forehead into the cold and colorful metal. "You always know exactly what to say, Wallace."

" _Of course I do. I'm just your repressed subconscious speaking out to you in the form of an elaborate ventriloquism act."_ A tiny plush paw fell onto Jimmy's arm. " _Or_ am  _I?"_

Suddenly, Elizabeth didn't seem so scary anymore. Jimmy booked it back to the house just in time for the matriarch herself to come to the door. "Señor Frost? What is- _mi hija!"_ She ran to Priscilla's side instantly, hugging the smaller rat to herself and crying softly. He patiently waited for her to ask what he knew was coming and prepared himself as best he could. "What happened? Where is Carla?"

Jimmy took a deep breath and knelt down to her level. "May I come inside? I think the whole family needs to hear this."

* * *

_Savannah Central_

_Zootopia Police Department - Precinct 1_

_8: 34 PM_

"It's been two hours, I have to pee, and for the last time, I don't know who your stupid mole is!"

Karen VanDal, and he was still trying to get over  _that_ curveball, had questioned him very intimately about each of his fellow officers, trying to squeeze out any information she could about who was most likely to be a mole. Her increasingly paranoid theories ranged from Wolford to Grizzoli to Clawhauser, even  _Carla_ of all mammals. Frankly, Nick had no idea, and he was almost starting to question the veracity of this "mole" theory entirely. In his exhausted state, he made the mistake of voicing that thought aloud, which did  _not_ sit well with her. "Of course you know! Aren't you supposed to know  _everyone?"_

"I will refrain from ever using that phrase again, just please oh please let me use the bathroom!"

"Alright, time's up!"

Chief Bogo barged into the room. Sooner or later, he finally had to wonder what was taking so long. Sooner would've been nice, but Nick wasn't about to look a gift buffalo in the mouth.

"I'm not finished here," Karen said, glowering at him.

"Too bad. You may be a guest, but this is still  _my_ precinct. I will take it from here." His tone left no room for argument.

"...This isn't over." Nick could still remember the furious glare Karen gave him as she stormed out of the room and slammed the door. He would probably be seeing plenty of it in his nightmares.

He really didn't want to think about that interrogation anymore, which was unfortunate because Bogo demanded a full summary. Nick gave it to him (after a bathroom break) while following the chief through the halls of the precinct, not heading towards anywhere in particular. They were more or less just circling the lobby in a maneuver Nick dubbed "professional pacing."

"So that IA agent didn't talk to you at all about what went down at the hotel?"

"Not really."

"Instead, she asked you about the evidence room theft, which you've already been cleared for, because she's convinced that it was an inside job?"

"Pretty much."

"On top of that, she also happens to be the mother of Savannah's missing prosecutor, who was apparently kidnapped, and for some reason thinks the ZPD is responsible?"

"Makes as much sense to me, sir."

" _That's_ what she's been talking to you about for the past two hours?"

"Uh huh."

"And did it actually get anywhere?"

"Can't say it did."

"Then it was all just a complete waste of our valuable time?"

"Well...I'm trying not to lie anymore, so…"

Bogo came to a stop, making Nick bump into his backside. "This is ridiculous."

"The interrogation or the fact that we're still in the lobby?" Nick stopped to wave at Clawhauser, who waved cheerfully back.

"I'll be giving IA a good, long talk about their agent's lack of professionalism," Bogo said, ignoring him as usual. "What did you say her name was? Karen VanDam?"

"VanDal, sir." Nick paused. "Actually...this is kind of a long shot, but maybe it wasn't such a waste after all."

"I'm listening." He even turned around to look at him. What high praise!

"You remember Simon, that raccoon who iced Mr. Big? I've seen him in person a couple times since and the resemblance is somewhere between 'uncanny' and 'please don't shoot me'." Bogo did not respond. "Or it could be a fluke. Maybe psychotic raccoons are just trending."

"No, hold on, don't dismiss it just yet. This could be worth looking into."

Even Nick couldn't hide his surprise. "Really?"

Bogo nodded. "We should have Karen VanDal's information in the records. Let's see if we can find a connection." He moved past Nick and headed towards the elevator that would lead back up to his office.

He stopped when he realized Nick wasn't following him. "Well? You need an invitation?"

"Uh...no, sir. Coming." Nick darted after him, still trying to wrap his head around the idea that Chief Bogo was completely and unambiguously on his side for once.

* * *

_Chief Bogo's Office_

_8:45 PM_

Nick sidled up next to Bogo as they scoured over his laptop. At this proximity and this late hour, it felt less like a police investigation and more like two buddies watching a movie on Petflix. "Alright...Karen VanDal...let's see what you've got to hide…" the chief said, making a few keystrokes.

The fox peeked over his shoulder, then through his horns as he brought up Karen's information. "Not much apparently. A few decades working in law enforcement, even Anipol, a nice house in the Meadowlands, squeaky clean criminal record, of course. That's almost  _more_ suspicious these days."

"And if she's as unstable as you implied, I don't see her getting a job in IA, let alone Anipol, without a little outside help," Bogo agreed, continuing to sift through her information. "There must be something she isn't telling us. A bit of unlisted background history or someone else's influence working behind the scenes."

Nick's wandering eyes froze on one specific point. "Like her emergency contact perhaps?" he asked, pointing at the screen.

" _Simon Charles VanDal,"_ Bogo read, gritting his teeth. "Husband."

"Well, that was easy. It even lists a phone number. What do you say, wanna give Ringtail a ring?"

The chief rolled his eyes. "Oh yes, I'm sure he'll be  _thrilled_ to hear from us. Bet he'll come waltzing right through the front doors of the ZPD if we just ask nicely enough."

"Yeah, he doesn't strike me as a guy that likes unsolicited calls anyway."

"Nor is he likely to be anywhere near his listed home address." Bogo now entered Simon's name into the search bar. "But maybe we can dig up something else."

Nick watched intently. "Annnnnnnnd...nothing." He patted the buffalo's back condescendingly. "We didn't find him back when we were specifically looking for one-legged raccoons, remember? Don't think he's in the records."

"And here I was almost starting to think you had learned deference towards authority," Bogo said, deadpan.

"You missed this. Admit it."

"No." A few more keystrokes and then a huff of annoyance. "Alright, what do  _you_  suggest then, smart guy? Zoogle him?"

"Hey, just because I took the chance to rag on you, that doesn't always mean I have a better idea. Just ask Carrots." His tail lowered a bit. "Hey...how's she doing anyway? Both of them."

"They're hanging in there," Bogo answered vaguely, but truthfully. "Your mo-the victim is in a comatose state, but Hopps seemed more worried about  _you,_ to be honest."

"That sounds like her alright." Nick allowed himself a small smile. "Figures that even with a shooting victim right in front of her, she still-wait a minute!" He shook Bogo's shoulders roughly. "The gun!"

"The one used on...her? We don't know what it-"

"No, not that one! The one Simon uses! Think we could get info on him through it?"

Bogo thought it over for a moment. "Potentially, if you can remember enough details. We don't have a huge archive on illegal firearms, so we're still not sure exactly what it was he used on those polar bears. But whatever it was, it wasn't standard issue."

Nick put his thinking cap on and tried to remember as much as he could about the gun. The closest look he got at it was while he was lying bleeding on the floor of Dream Time, so he wasn't exactly the best source to ask.

Still the best source they  _had_ though. "I think...it was a revolver of some kind. That's the one with the spinny chamber thing, right?" Bogo nodded. "It was silver and, uh, knocked out Fangs and Boomer without killing them. Rubber bullets, I think the roo said."

"There were no shots heard on the night of Big's murder either," Bogo added. "So it's likely he used a silencer on it."

"That's a lot of gizmos for one gun." Nothing special compared to his father's cane though. "Is that common?"

"Nope." Bogo smiled as he typed all of this information into the system. "So it's an extremely powerful silver revolver capable of taking both a silencer and custom rounds. Let's see if that gets us anywhere…"

They got only a handful of results, but they came with pictures. "That's it!" Nick yelled, physically jabbing a claw into one of the images, a perfect match for the gun Simon carried.

"A B-11 Silver Centurion? These guys come up with the most pretentious names for their toys." Bogo opened up the record and looked over it. "Just as I thought, this thing is super rare, even for a firearm. In fact, despite its capabilities, it rarely even sees combat use. It's mainly given out as a retirement present to members of elite paramilitary forces."

"Elite paramilitary forces…" Nick repeated. "Guess I can stop picking on Carrots for getting her butt kicked by him. What else?"

"That's it."

"...What do you mean that's it?"

"That's  _it."_ The water buffalo finally shoved him away. "It's not like they're going to post gifting photos of all the happy recipients. This is special ops stuff here. We have more information on the suspect, his family, and the weapon he carries, but otherwise, we've hit a dead end."

"Come on, he's some super soldier with a rare and dangerous weapon? I could've guessed  _that_ much!" Nick snapped. "How are we supposed to  _find_ him?"

"Maybe through the missus." Bogo stood up abruptly, making Nick glad he let go when he did. "We've got more than enough info to rake Karen over the coals now. Let's go interrogate your interrogator."

"Wait!" Nick said, reaching out to stop him. "There's one more thing I wanted to look into."

"What's that?"

"The Kyle VanDal case."

Bogo frowned. "You don't seriously believe that the ZPD  _kidnapped_ a public prosecutor, do you?"

Honestly, Nick wasn't sure  _what_ to believe anymore. "...I just wanted to know more about it. More ammunition to throw at Krazy Karen, right?"

"Fine." Bogo sat back down, Nick keeping a healthy distance this time as he pulled up the relevant case file. "Kyle VanDal, age 31. Talented young prosecutor with a perfect arrest and courtroom record. Went missing about two weeks ago. He was last seen at Hamwood Memorial Park in Savannah Central, sitting on a park bench. Security footage later caught him leaving the park and getting into his car, seemingly of his own will. Traffic cams lost track of him going into a tunnel and never coming back out."

"Those tunnels will getcha every time," Nick said solemnly.

"He hasn't been seen since. The only real evidence we even have is a jacket he left behind on that bench. Take a guess how much we pulled off of  _that._ Here's a hint: rhymes with 'hack wit'." Bogo closed the case file. "And that's the tragic tale of Kyle VanDal. Happy now?"

" _Confused_ would be a more accurate word. What does any of that have to do with the ZPD?"

He snorted. "Did you think an internal kidnapping scheme would just be listed in our records for anyone to find?"

Nick did a double-take, even more confused now. "Wait, does that mean you believe…?"

"I don't know  _what_ to believe anymore," he said simply, getting back up again.

_Whoa._

Nick wasn't about to let this opportunity slip by. Before Bogo could leave, the fox blocked his path and held up his paw. "Go team?"

Bogo glared down at him for several long seconds. Then he raised a hoof and smacked it into his paw hard enough to make it sting. "Go team."

He headed past Nick and out the door, the fox cheering silently behind him.

 _Wait until Carrots hears about_ this  _shocker! Oh, and that VanDal stuff too, I guess._

* * *

_New Mexicow_

_Rodentriguez Residence_

_8: 38 PM_

There was much to be said about the nobility of Jimmy's decision to be honest and upfront with the Rodentriguez family. That didn't make it any less terrifying.

"And, uh, that's about the size of it," he finished, trying to ignore the fact that he was being stared at by hundreds of rodent eyes. A fact he had been trying to ignore for quite a while actually. "Any...questions?"  _This isn't a Prowler Point presentation, you idiot!_

Several dozen paws shot up. At least they were being polite.

He felt obligated to give the floor to Elizabeth though. The matriarch remained huddled over the still-unconscious form of her daughter. It was probably for the best that he wouldn't be the one to explain this to her, for the sake of his cajones. "Señor Frost, I only need you to answer me one thing."

"Wait, really?" He looked again at the sea of raised rodent hands. "What's that?"

"Where is Carla now?" The rest of the hands lowered.

"I told you, she was still at the arena when we escaped. The Count's guys probably took her somewhere else though. I don't know where."

"I see…" Elizabeth slowly turned to the rest of her family. Jimmy remained silent, ready to comfort them in their time of need.

"Did you hear that?! Carla is in trouble! Are we just going to sit back and let those beasts do whatever they please with her?!"

" _No!"_ the tiny voices shouted back.

"Then let's go find her and kick their tails in!"

" _Yeah!"_

"Yeah!" Jimmy cheered. "Wait, no! Guys, did you miss the part about her being a spy? Because that hyena is a spy."

"That hyena is  _family,"_ Elizabeth corrected. "And regardless of her actions, she always will be. We've  _all_ made stupid mistakes before, haven't we?"

A chorus of rat voices answered.

"Ooooooh, yeah!"

"Remember the Flaming Churro Incident?"

"Or the Day of the Dead? Not the holiday."

Elizabeth picked up a small, but sturdy rolling pin. "Besides, they've already taken three of my children. By my vow as a mother, they will take no more." The rest of the rats were already arming themselves with other dangerous household items like they were about to fight a miniature war.

"B-But you don't even know where to look!" Jimmy protested, quickly losing control of the conversation.

"Then we'll find out just like Carla would. By beating the snot out of everyone in our way until one of them talks!"

The rowdy rats roared in approval.

"Rodentriguez family... _vamanos!"_ Elizabeth led the charge out of the house and onto the streets of New Mexicow, bellowing a war cry. The rest of the family was quick to follow, just as passionate, just as aggressive, and just as oblivious to Jimmy Frost being directly in their way.

 _Let no one say they don't keep their promises._ The arctic fox groaned, dragging himself back to his feet. His fur and uniform were in shambles, now covered with hundreds of little rat tracks. Regaining his bearings, Jimmy quickly realized the house was now empty. "Hey, wait! Where's Priscilla?!"

"We took her with us!' Elizabeth yelled from outside. "She'd be furious if she found out we saved Carla without her!"

And with that, they were gone, their cries for blood echoing down the street.

Jimmy looked down at Wallace, left in equally bad shape. "Wallace, I'm not sure, did that go well or horribly wrong?"

For once, Wallace remained silent.

"Yeah, I'm stumped too."

* * *

_Savannah Central_

_Zootopia Police Department - Precinct 1_

_8: 51 PM_

"If we hurry, we can still catch her," Bogo said, quickening his pace as he headed back down to the lobby, even taking the  _stairs._ Nick had to practically jog to keep up with him as he waved down Clawhauser at the front desk. "You see a scary-looking raccoon come through here lately?"

The cheetah shook his head. "No, but there was a pretty cheerful-looking one who left a few minutes ago."

"Dammit!" Bogo swore, stomping his hoof. "We just missed her!"

"I don't know," Nick said. "Why would she be  _cheerful_ after what just happened? Not sure she's even physically capable of it. Must be a different raccoon."

But Clawhauser continued. "The one that interrogated Nick, right? The IA agent? She had to show me her badge before I let her in, so-"

"Okay, thanks! We got it!" Bogo sighed, turning towards the open doors. "It really does feel like they're always one step ahead of us, huh? Maybe Karen was on to something after all. Maybe there really is a mole in the ZPD."

Nick laughed it off. "What? Naaaaaaah."

A dirty and disheveled Jimmy Frost came barreling through the doors, covered in equal parts mud and bruising. "There's a mole in the ZPD!"

"Officer Frost?!" Bogo exclaimed.

"Jimmy?!" Nick coughed uncomfortably as he recalled the last conversation they'd had before his little "episode." "How, uh, how's it been?"

"Terrible! Didn't you hear me?! There's-ACK!" In his hurry to get to them, Jimmy tripped and fell flat on his face. They spent a few seconds just watching his unmoving form in complete silence.

"Should I call 911?" Clawhauser asked.

Jimmy gasped and sprang back up, dry heaving. "Gotta...warn you...bad things...happened!"

"Okay, kid, just slow down," Nick said calmly, coming over to help him. "Deep breaths now. You look like you got hit by a bus."

"I did! But the rats were worse!"

"...Benji, I think he might need that 911."

" _He's not crazy, guys!"_ Wallace vouched for him. " _Carla sold us out!"_

"Officer Hyenandez?!" Bogo asked, in complete disbelief. " _She's_ the mole?!"

"Wait,  _Carla_ hustled us?" From how little he'd known her, Nick was even more stunned. Chuckles? Snickers? Humorless Hyenandez? He wasn't sure if he was horrified or impressed that she had fooled even him for so long. He was towing the line at least. "I'd ask if that's a joke, but you're only slightly better at those than her. No offense."

"Actually, she's better than you think," Jimmy said. "See, we went to visit her mate and it turns out she was adopted by a bunch of rats and she's also a luchador and then Sanchez came and Carla challenged that big lion guy to a wrestling match and it was really awesome and she won but also lost because that bat was there and she killed Sanchez and they took Carla and-"

"I'm sorry, you lost me there," Nick interrupted. "Carla has a  _mate?"_

"Nevermind that!" Bogo snapped. "If what he says is true, then your dad has been playing us from the very beginning! It's no wonder we haven't been able to stop him yet!"

 _I should've known._ No matter how insane Reynard's plans were, he couldn't help but keep thinking that. He  _was_ his son, after all. If anyone could see something like this coming, it had to be him. But Reynard was so much better at being the worst example of their kind. He had truly planned for everything and accounted for anything.

Well... _almost_ anything. "We can  _now."_

"Huh?"

"If my father has just lost his spy, that means he can't track everything we're doing anymore. He'll have no idea what we're planning or when we're going to go after the final crime lord, Piers Narwhalter." Despite the direness of the situation, Nick gave a triumphant smirk. "So I say we go after him  _right now."_

Bogo frowned. "That's a bit short notice, Wilde. Besides, how do you know Reynard isn't on his way to the Docks as we speak?"

"Trust me, I think he's got other things on his mind right now," Nick replied, still a bit satisfied about that.

"The disturbing thing is I  _do_ trust you," Bogo admitted. "Fine, but who are you even going to get to come along? Do you have any idea how spread out our forces are right now? I've got maybe a half-dozen officers still in the building. Another thing to thank your father for."

"I'm in!" Jimmy said, his enthusiasm returning quickly.

Bogo scoffed. " _That's_ no surprise. But who else?"

" _Me too!"_ Wallace yelled.

"That doesn't count!"

"I'll go!" Clawhauser raised his paw from across the room.

"You don't either!"

"Well, I've got a pretty busy schedule tonight, but I  _guess_ I can make time for this," Nick said with an exaggerated moan.

He was pretty sure he'd just lost most of the progress he made with Bogo, but the look on his face was worth it. "If I may suggest the obvious solution, what about Officer Hopps?"

"Yeah! We'll be like The Three Mouseketeers!" Jimmy agreed. "Kinda sucks that we're not the Furtastic Four anymore though…"

" _What am I, chopped liver?"_

A slyer than usual smirk crossed Nick's lips. "Or arrrrrrre we?"

"You're not seriously giving the plushie credence, right?" Bogo asked.

"Actually, I'm giving  _you_ credence," Nick said, smiling up at him. "Methinks we couldn't hope for a better replacement grouch than the chief killjoy himself."

" _Me?_ Do I need to show you what I've got on my plate tonight?"

"Nothing right now, sir!" Clawhauser helpfully reported.

"It was a rhetorical question!" Bogo looked back at Nick to find him still smiling. He didn't smile back. "You do realize that you should legally be behind bars right now? The only reason you aren't is because of my rare generosity. I suggest you don't push it any further."

"I'm only complimenting your skill and leadership qualities," Nick replied, pushing it further. "Come on, don't you wanna bust these guys with your own hooves? I'll let you punch my dad in the faaaaaace."

Bogo groaned, once again realizing that his intimidation tactics were less than effective on the fox. "Alright. On one condition."

Nick nodded eagerly. "Uh huh?"

But the second he saw the evil smile on Bogo's lips, he regretted the idea instantly. "No puns, no snark, no nicknames, no stupid jokes of any kind for the  _entire mission."_

Jimmy gasped, putting his paws to his lips.

" _Oh snap!"_

Nick looked like he was about to faint. "What?! But...but that's like telling me not to be me!"

"Not being you would make you much more tolerable, yes."

"I-I-I mean...it's like telling Clawhauser he can't have donuts anymore!"

Clawhauser let out a high-pitched scream.

"No one's telling you that!" As the cheetah narrowly averted a heart attack, Bogo leaned back down towards Nick. "So what's it gonna be, Wilde? Do we have a deal?"

Nick took a deep breath and stepped forward, Jimmy watching him intently. "Don't do it, Nick! It's not worth it!"

"I have to, Jimmy. For the greater good." He steeled his resolve. "Deal."

"Good. Then we'd best get going." Nick watched Bogo head for the doors, feeling like he had just sold his soul. "Oh, and you might want to bring  _this_ along too!" He dug something out of his pocket and tossed it over his shoulder to him like it was a piece of worthless junk.

Unsurprisingly, it was Nick's police badge. "It's not official yet, so you don't get to wear it again. Just thought you might like to hold on to that."

Nick smiled anyway. "I shall carry it with unofficial honor, sir."

Bogo looked over his shoulder. "That sounded an awful lot like snark to me."

Nick tensed. "I mean...thank you for the opportunity, sir."

Bogo chuckled darkly. "I'm enjoying this already."

Muttering bitterly to himself, Nick followed the chief out through the front doors with Jimmy following after  _him_ as per usual. "So are we going to call Carr-Judy to meet us there or what?"

"The hospital is on the way, Wilde. You're not getting out of going there  _that_ easily," Bogo said knowingly.

"Whaaaaat? Why would I be trying to get out of that?" Nick asked innocently.

"Probably because your mom's there and it's been a really long time since you've seen her and you're kinda sorta the reason she got shot?" Jimmy offered.

"Thanks, kid. And that doesn't count as a nickname!" he said, already stopping Bogo before he could even open his mouth. "It's just...she's not even awake right now. And maybe she'll never be again. To leave her alone for all these years only to come back when she can't even look at me just seems...cruel, you know? Mom deserves better than that."

"You're just making excuses," said Bogo, seeing through it instantly.

"Yeah, maybe I am," Nick admitted. "Doesn't make it any less true."

He was immediately hugged by Jimmy, and Wallace by extension. "Nick, come on, it'll be okay. We'll all be there for you." Bogo snorted. "Physically."

_Congratulations, Momma's Boy, you're being comforted by Jimmy Frost. You've officially reached a new level of pathetic._

* * *

_Savannah Central_

_St. Bernarde's Hospital_

_8: 53 PM_

Judy let out a yawn. It was getting late, and even with police privileges, she knew she wouldn't be allowed to stay here much longer. Marian's care was out of her paws now. Now she had another duty to perform: to ensure that his son would get to see her again, preferably without a glass wall between them.

She leaned over to Marian's prone form and gently placed a paw on her shoulder, watching the gentle rhythm of the various machines keeping her alive. "I have to go now, Marian. Nick needs me too. But I promise that I'll bring Nick back to you, and I always keep my promises." Judy stepped down from her lofty position on the bed and headed for the exit.

She caught a scent in the air that stopped her in her tracks. As soon as she recognized it, nothing in this depressing atmosphere could stop a smile from forming on her lips. "Nick!" Talk about the world's most quickly fulfilled promise. She sped across the room towards the door.

She screeched to a halt as the scent became clearer. No...this wasn't Nick's scent. It was very similar though, kind of...like...Marian's…

_Oh no. Oh no oh no oh NO!_

It was almost embarrassing that her first instinct was to hide, but she was  _not_ about to put Marian in any more danger by acting recklessly. Judy threw herself into a nearby supply cabinet and shut the metal doors, only then starting to worry that she might be in danger regardless.

Minute went by before something actually happened, or at least it  _felt_ that way when she had ears that could pick up every single sound in the room. The beeps and hums of Marian's life support, the rustling of the sheets, the curtains blowing in the gentle breeze, and especially the medical equipment she kept bumping into just trying to fit in here.

And then came the sound of the door opening, followed by padded footsteps slowly moving across the floor and a thin object tapping against the surface, both moving towards Marian's bed. Judy closed her eyes and held her breath, listening as closely as she could for more subtle audio clues.

"Oh, Marian…"

Voices worked too.

"It's true...what did that fiend  _do_ to you?"

She heard a small thump and the bed shifting under added weight.

"Damn that Simon. If only he'd done a better job looking after you, none of this would have happened. I can assure you, I won't be hiring someone into management again just because I find their background amusing. The nerve of that...dumb trash panda...and his...metal leg thing…"

He trailed off into a loud sigh.

"You know what the worst part about being the world's greatest conmammal is, Marian? You can fool anyone but yourself. Nicholas was right, this is all  _my_ fault."

His voice started to hitch.

"I just...I just wanted to help him, you know? I didn't want him to waste his talents trying to help a city that treats our kind like dirt...and will continue to treat us like dirt long after they forget about him. Sooner or later, that reality is going to set in and I'm...I'm not sure he can handle it anymore, Marian. He's too far gone in this delusion, thinking he can really change the world...and it's going to destroy him in the end. What kind of father would I be to just...to just sit back and let that happen?"

Judy would've been more incensed by those comments if not for the genuine hurt she could hear in his voice. He let out a humorless chuckle.

"If you were awake right now, you'd probably slap me again. I wouldn't blame you...I didn't back then either. Even growing up in a cesspool like Happytown, you were too innocent for your own good, but...but I loved that about you, Marian. You were truly one of a kind. I was drawn to you...needed to protect you from the harshness of the outside world. You...and especially young Nicholas. No matter how much we fought about it...no matter how many lumps I took...it was all worth it to keep you safe. So why...why…?"

Finally, Judy heard tears drop onto the fabric.

"Why couldn't I protect you  _now?_ Have I really become...become so monstrous that I can't even protect my own family anymore? That I'm now actively throwing you in harm's way? Nicholas...hates me...told me I should've stayed gone. You...might never wake up again...not even to agree with him. And don't even get me started on…my  _other_ mistake…"

He spent the next minute just sobbing. Judy slumped her head against the doors, not sure how much more of this she wanted to hear.

"I'm so sorry...for all of this. I don't deserve...any of you. Maybe...maybe I should...stop. Turn myself in or just…leave and...never come back. That's what you both want...isn't it? If nothing else...I can...at least...obey your last wishes."

Judy had slumped too far. With a loud bang, the doors flew open and she fell over onto the floor. "Oh...no…"

" _You!"_

The old fox rose from his spot on the bed, quickly wiping the tears from his eyes as he used them to glare at her. He wore a black suit that looked fresh, yet already disheveled, his fur unkempt, and...was he wearing Nick's tie? Why did it have blood on it? "Damn it all, I  _knew_ it smelled like rabbit in here. I thought I was just getting hungry."

Judy picked herself back up, resisting the urge to immediately reach for her tranq pistol. Kinda wishing she still had fox repellent though. "I know who you are, John Wilde. Just stay right there and we can talk about this."

"It's  _Reynard! Count_ Reynard! How many times do I have to tell you mammals?!" Reynard circled around the bed to face her, his cane smacking threateningly into his open palm. "And I know aaaaaaall about  _you_ , Twitchy."

" _Twitchy?"_ And she thought "Carrots" took some getting used to.

"I get it now…" he said softly, the cane hitting his paw faster and faster. "I should've pieced it together sooner. It's not me...it's you!  _You_ led that wolf to my wife!  _You_ poisoned my son against me! Who the hell do you think you are screwing with my family?!"

 _Now_ she reached for her gun, drawing it on Reynard before he could get any closer with that thing. She had been trained for this situation enough to know when reason was off the table. "I'm Judy Hopps, ZPD officer, and for the sake of you  _and_ your family, I'm taking you in. Now drop the weapon."

To her surprise, he did. The cane clattered onto the floor, the headpiece smiling at her almost tauntingly. "No, it's not just you, is it? It's the entire ZPD. Simon was right about you. You corrupted Nicholas into this unnatural shape, giving him this false optimism, setting him up for failure. It's not just the crime lords I should be targeting... _it's_   _all of you!"_

"Stop talking!" she demanded. If he was anything like Nick, the longer she let him speak, the worse the situation would get. So she made her orders quick and to the point. "Get on the floor, arms behind your back!" Her finger tensed on the trigger, ready to pull it in an instant if he failed to comply.

But once again, he did. "Go ahead and arrest me. It won't make any difference in the end. I will have my revenge."

She ignored his mad ramblings, approaching him slowly with her gun unmoving and pawcuffs at the ready. Yes, she had been around Nick  _far_ too long to fall for any of his verbal trickery.

But what she failed to realize was that Reynard knew that too, and if he were planning to manipulate her, it would be by pretending to do exactly what she wanted, knowing full well she was too by-the-books to pull the trigger unless he gave her reason to, and would ignore anything he said. Including voice commands. " _Firefox."_

Judy jumped away as a plume of fire erupted from the mouth of the cane, shooting reflexively. It might have still hit Reynard had he not moved in that same instant, picking up the cane and swinging the headpiece into her cheek. The rabbit fell back onto the floor, learning a painful lesson that day about her foe.

She hoped she would be able to use it in the future, given that he was now standing on her chest and raising the cane above his head to bash her skull in with it. She could see the madness in his bloodshot eyes as they bore into her. "Heeheehee...hahahahaha... _ahahahahahahahahaha!"_

"Nich...olas? Is...that...you…?"

His manic laughter died down as he turned to the bed, his expression far beyond shocked. Even if she couldn't see her from this position, Judy instantly recognized the voice as Marian's.

The second she did, the weight left her chest. Judy rolled to the right, snatching up her dropped gun and firing at Reynard as he took off running, just missing his bushy tail as he turned the corner. She went to run after him, but Marian's voice stopped her again. "Ni..cho...las?"

She lowered her gun, moving to the side of her bed. Marian's eyes were barely open, her breathing barely her own...but she was awake.

"He's not here," Judy said, almost crying herself, "but he will be soon."

* * *

_Zootopia Police Department - Precinct 1_

_Parking Lot_

_8:57 PM_

"You know, you look really different without your tie."

"Why do you smell like cheese?"

"As much as I'm enjoying watching you two hug it out, can we get a move on already?" Bogo asked irritably. "You're the one who wanted to rush this, Wilde."

Jimmy released him, a bit embarrassed. "Chief Bogo considers shows of affection a waste of time," Nick thought aloud. "That explains a lot."

"Snark." The buffalo pulled open the driver's side door and climbed in. "Do whatever you want, but we're still driving by the hospital to pick up Hopps. My car, my rules."

"Once again, I reluctantly accept your terms," Nick conceded. "Also, I call shotgun."

"Too late." Bogo pointed a hoof at Jimmy, who had already claimed the front seat and was miming driving motions with Wallace. The arctic fox was learning fast. "Guess where that puts you."

Nick refused to give him the satisfaction of a response as he wordlessly climbed into the back, the prisoner's seat, for the second time that night. He didn't know how, but they planned this.

"Hold tight, everyone. I adhere rigidly to the speed laws, but don't expect me to go a single iota slower." Bogo put the car into gear and pulled out of the parking lot.

"By the way, what were you guys talking about before I came in?" Jimmy asked curiously.

"Just chasing a potential lead," Bogo explained. "Don't worry about it for now. It's not important."

Nick grumbled and nodded in agreement.

* * *

_ZNN Special Report!_

_9:00 PM_

"Good evening, Zootopia! This is Steven Stinkman bringing you another scent-sational story with the Nocturnal News!" a familiar skunk greeted from an alleyway. "But first, let me introduce my new cameramammal. You may remember Billy Silva from our last story on Lady Lang."

"Yo." The silver fox waved his paw in front of the camera. "I'm only here because Steven got startled by the thunder and put the last cameramammal in a stink-induced coma."

"B-Billy!"

"What? I thought it was our job to report on interesting stories."

"That's  _my_ job!" he insisted, recovering quickly like a true semi-professional. "We're coming to you live from a dark alley in front of the ZPD's Precinct 1 building, logically the safest dark alley in all of Zootopia. According to vague sources, Precinct 1's Officer Nick Wilde has just been arrested! This comes at the tail-end of a lengthy skirmish at the Grand Palms Hotel, during which it came to light that the mastermind behind the Crime Lord Killings may be his own father!" Steven grimaced. "And I thought  _I_ had a troubled upbringing."

"Wait, so we're allowed to talk about  _that_ , but…"

"We're here now to get some feedback from folks in the local area. I'm not allowed on ZPD premises anymore, so instead, I'm just going to stand in this dark alley and jump out at mammals who walk by." Right on cue, an old goat lady hobbled past. "Ah, excuse me, m'am-"

The goat shrieked, beating him over the head with her purse. "GAH! Billy, help!"

"Don't worry, I'm not missing any of this!" He reassured him, making sure the camera picked up every last whack.

Finally, the goat let up and fled on her walker, leaving Steven to rub his sore head. "I guess we know what  _her_ opinion is…"

"For some reason, I kinda thought that you would be better at planning things out."

"Honestly, not as much as you'd expect. Maybe this idea  _could_ use some fine-reeking though…" Before he could come up with anything, another mammal walked by and his reporter's instinct won out. "Pardon me, you scary-looking gentlemammal, but do you have anything to say about the rumors of Nick Wilde's arrest?"

"...Is this what qualifies as news these days?" the disgruntled raccoon asked back. "That wasn't even the most noteworthy thing to happen today."

Steven faltered, caught off-guard. "Really? Well, there  _have_ been some unconfirmed reports about Sandcat Sanchez, but we're still sniffing those out."

"You misunderstand. I mean that the biggest news story of the day hasn't  _happened_ yet." The raccoon smiled calmly. "But don't worry, you're in the perfect position to get some exclusive coverage."

"A new scoop?!  _Here?!"_ Steven asked excitedly. "Oh boy oh boy oh boy!"

Billy peeked out from behind the camera. "Uh...maybe it's because I'm new to this, but that sounded like kind of a red flag."

"You're right, Billy. You  _are_ new to this. To get by in this business, you gotta stick your nose into any scoop you can find." He turned back to the raccoon. "Isn't that right, Mr…"

He trailed off, not because he was waiting for a name, but because the raccoon had already left.

_This is it._

Simon VanDal walked through the ZPD parking lot, slowly, but with purpose. With Wilde's group gone, there were but a few officers left here. Aside from those idiot reporters, no one saw him coming.

_I will wait no longer._

Despite his best efforts, the wolf who shot Marian Wilde had eluded his grasp. That was well enough for him. He was a fellow professional and had earned his right to revenge. He didn't give a damn whether he lived or died and certainly wasn't going to waste any more time going after him.

_I know what I must do._

So the Count didn't want him around anymore, did he? Good riddance. He had relied on the old fox for far too long already. He didn't need to see his twisted plan through to the end before he got what he was owed. Now, he would simply do what he did best...and take it himself.

_I will have my son back. One way or another._

Simon pushed open the front doors of the building, finding himself immediately the subject of attention. He looked slowly up at the portly cheetah now gaping at him, donut frozen in front of his mouth.

And then he smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At this point, even WE'RE not sure what the deal with Wallace is. Not sure we ever want to give a definitive answer either. :P
> 
> At least you've finally got some answers about Simon...and family. Yeah, mammals being driven to extreme lengths for the sake of family is a bit of a recurring theme, isn't it? Who do you think has the most effed up family so far? Seriously, that's the next reader question.
> 
> After having a few of the background officers tag along so far, Chief Bogo himself finally gets in on the action. He really is the best option we can think of to replace Carla. Besides, it's nice to see him in a role other than the hardass who assigns cases and yells at his subordinates. Perhaps he could have chosen a better time, but props to him anyway.
> 
> What's that? What happened to Carla anyway? No idea what you're talking about. *whistles*


	25. Intermission Impossible

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's nice to get into a rhythm of posting to two sites now. A rhythm of regular updates again is pretty cool too.
> 
> Despite where last chapter was heading, we're still in intermission times. But not just any intermission! This is...

**Chapter 25: Intermission Impossible**

_Sahara Square_

_Fracaso Felino_

_9: 02 PM_

"Wow, this place got  _destroyed."_

"Good. That's what the fans come to see, Cole."

The ring was in complete shambles, torn and dented in several places, to say nothing of the amount of junk scattered around it. Cole nearly tripped over a stray tuba, kicking away the instrument angrily and hurting his foot in the process. "Ow! Why did you even want to come back here again?"

Devin grinned at him, and his injury. "Haven't ya heard? Sanchez just got whacked. That Count Reynard is quickly becoming the guy ta know if you wanna get ahead."

"But we're retired."

"Yeah, well maybe we don't hafta be! Come on, you saw that last match. I'm still awesome, you're still a tool, we've still got it!"

Cole thought it over for a moment. "Maybe you're right. I bet the Count's gonna arrange a  _ton_ of matches he'll need us for."

"From what  _I_ hear about him, it might not even be limited to matches!" Devin laughed, extending a paw. "Put 'er there, pal! Let's ride this thing to the bitter end!"

Cole grinned and shook it. "Sounds good to me! I can't wait to get back into the groove again!"

"For fame!"

"For fortune!"

"For Carla!"

"...Huh?"

" _MATAR!"_

The two announcers screamed as they were suddenly set upon by a horde of angry rats, pummeled with tiny weapons and dragged below the ring as they begged for mercy they would not receive.

* * *

_Savannah Central_

_9: 10 PM_

It had been a rough night so far, to say the least, but it didn't take Nick long to find the silver lining in all of this.

No, not the case — his deal with Chief Bogo. Try to deny  _him_ his natural charms, would he? Too bad for him that Nick still had a secret weapon up his sleeve.

Jimmy.

" _99 bottles of mooze on the wall! 99 bottles of mooze! You take one down, pass it around! 98 bottles of mooze on the wall!"_

"Wilde?! What have you done?!" Bogo asked, horrified.

"Sorry, sir. You left me no choice."

" _You take one down, pass it around! 97 bottles of mooze on the wall!"_

The buffalo strained not to go over the speed limit. "How does he even have this much energy after what he's been through?!"

"I have a name for that, but I can't say it without breaking our deal."  _Frostbytes._

" _-pass it around, 96 bottles of mooze on the wall! 95 bottles of-oomph!"_

Jimmy stopped singing, the immediate result of Wallace's butt being shoved into his mouth. Bogo sighed in relief. "Problem solved."

"You're already reminding me of Carla, chief," Nick said, forcing himself not to make a more witty remark,  _I'm starting to remind_ myself  _of Carla too. This sucks._

"And  _you're_ already making me regret this," he shot back. "You're just lucky Officer Frost has an off switch."

"Yeah, but Wallace doesn't."

" _95 bottles of mooze on the wall!"_ the wallabeanie continued to sing, its head still sticking out of Jimmy's mouth. " _95 bottles of mooze!"_

Nick joined in. " _You take one down, pass it around!"_

" _94 bottles of mooze on the wall!"_ they both sang.

If it weren't for his rigid commitment to road safety, Chief Bogo could have downed every last one of those bottles.

* * *

_St. Bernarde's Hospital_

_37 Bottles Later_

" _Finally,_ we made it," Nick said, if only to get one last jab at the visibly drained police chief before hopping out of the car. The hospital was still fairly busy even at this time of night, further evidence of his father's extending influence and the consequences thereof. Bogo remained silent as they headed into the building, and so did Jimmy due to still having Wallace wedged in his throat. Nick stopped to help him get it out before one of the staff tried to surgically remove it.

"Can I help you?" a gnu receptionist asked, noticing their badges instantly and giving them priority over the rest of the waiting room.

Bogo professionally ignored the resentful glares as he stepped forward and flashed his badge again just for good measure. "We're here to pick up Officer Hopps. She should have arrived here earlier with a patient named Marian Wilde." Nick flinched a bit at the reminder. "What room are they staying in?"

He could've just as easily asked her to call Judy out here, but didn't just to make Nick squirm a little more. "It's… Room 212, but visiting hours are already over. We were about to fetch Officer Hopps anyway if you wanted to just wait here."

Bogo caught the pleading look from Nick and promptly ignored it. "No need to inconvenience you any further. We'll take it from here." Nick facepawed as the buffalo and arctic fox started off. "You can stay here if it's  _too much_ for you, Wilde," Bogo added.

Nick took one look at the crowd of residents staring at him and knew his choice was already made. He almost felt relieved that he no longer had to make it. "I'll come too, thanks."

But just to make sure he didn't get off too easy, Bogo twisted the knife one last time. "Guess you really are a momma's boy, right, Frost?"

"Oh yeah, definitely!" Jimmy said loudly. "Nick must love his mom a  _lot!_ Huh? Why are you waving your arms and making shushing noises, Nick?"

"Awwwww!" the residents, and the receptionist, chorused.

The worst part was, Chief Bogo was already down the hall and up the stairs, no doubt patting himself on the back.  _So you too have learned the art of weaponized Frost. Well played, sir. Well played._

Nick hurried after him, Jimmy skipping behind as oblivious as always. The chief could make him look bad all he wanted, but he was  _not_ going to be the first to see his mother in this state. Forcing down all of his previous uncertainties, Nick bolted up the stairs, crossed the hall, and stepped in front of him just as he reached for the door. "Nuh-uh. Me first." His heart was pounding. Lest he lose this burst of courage now, he swiftly threw open the door.

He heard Judy scream and then froze on the spot as a tranq dart embedded itself an inch from his head. "...Hi, Carrots."

"Nick!" She bounded across the floor in a single leap and slammed him against the door in a bone-crushing hug. At least she wasn't hitting him this time, but knowing her, that could change in a heartbeat. "It really  _is_ you! I thought I smelled you, but…"

"But what? You thought it might be  _another_ tall, handsome tod coming to visit at this late hour?"

"Yes, actually."

"...Wait, what?"

Bogo cleared his throat behind them. "Not to interrupt yet another sappy moment, but we're actually here on official police business and we need to get going. But before that...I thought Wilde might want to have a moment with his mother."

Judy smiled up at him. "Wow, you really  _are_ a sweet guy, chief. That's so thoughtful of you."

"Yeah, he's a real sentimentalist," Nick said dryly.

"Sarcasm," Bogo noted.

"Yeah, he's a real sentimalist!" Nick said sincerely.

"Hey, Nick?" Jimmy nudged his shoulder. "I think she's looking at you."

It didn't take him long to realize he wasn't talking about Judy. Nick found that he was subconsciously avoiding looking at Marian's prone form only when it was pointed out to him. But more importantly, "She's...awake?"

"Nicholas…" Marian said weakly, barely staying focused on him. He could see a small smile forming on the vixen's lips and a tear trailing down from one half-lidded eye.

No turning back now. Nick moved across the room almost mechanically, he too focused only on his mother, the vixen he had only seen through a dirty glass frame for the past two decades. He really was a lousy son. But the way she looked at him now, he could tell she didn't blame him in the slightest.

Behind him, he was only fleetingly aware of Bogo nodding silently to Judy and Jimmy and ushering them out of the room, shutting the door and leaving them alone. Whether this was an engineered move on his part or genuine sympathy, it didn't matter to him anymore. Not at all. "Hey, Mom."

"You're really back…" Marian said, blinking a few times as if she thought she might be hallucinating from whatever drugs they were putting into her.

"That's right," Nick said gently, allowing his mask to crumble. If he could truly be himself around anyone, it was his mother. "How have you been?"

 _How have you_ been?  _Really?_

If he could truly embarrass himself around anyone, it was his mother. It occurred to him that a twenty year absence  _might_ have impacted his ability to talk to her. "Better." She smiled regardless. "Much better."

"Yeah, you really seem like you're recovering."

"I'm not talking about that, you silly." She giggled, actually  _giggled_ through her oxygen mask. "No bullet could keep me from seeing you again."

"Not technically true, but okay." Now Nick laughed too. Were they pumping something into this room? "Heh. I forgot how much you remind me of Carrots. No wonder she was able to get through my thick skull."

"Yes...about her." Marian winked slyly. "I approve."

"...Approve what?"

"Oh, nothing." He reminded himself to grill Judy on whatever they talked about later. "I'm just glad she could help you find your way." She choked up a bit.

"I missed you, Nicholas."

_Hold it together, Nick. Keep a lid on the waterworks. It's not that touching, it's not that touching-nope, here they come._

"I missed you too, Mom." He looked back at the door, just to make sure no one was recording him, then broke like a cheap porcelain vase. "I'm sorry." He couldn't stay composed enough to list everything he was sorry for again. There was too much to cover anyway.

"Come here," Marian requested. Nick sniffled, his con senses hoping she wasn't about to smack him as he leaned towards her.

She slowly reached a paw up and...ruffled his head. "It's okay. You think I'd hold a grudge against you for that?"

"Kinda, yeah."

"Well, I don't." She pulled him in for a hug with surprising force given her condition. "You've been away far too long already without me putting up any more walls between us. Just promise me you won't do it again."

Nick nodded numbly, still embarrassed by how much more torn up he was than her. "I promise. But...I do kinda have to…"

"Yes, you need to go put John in his place, I know." Marian pulled away, patting his shoulder lightly. "Don't worry. I can wait...just a little bit longer."

Nick reached for his tie to wipe away his tears, remembered he didn't have it, and used his armfur instead. "Thanks, Mom. When I get back, I'll be a fox you can be proud of."

"Oh, Nicholas," she laughed, flicking him on the nose. "You already are."

* * *

_9: 46 PM_

When Nick finally emerged, he was not surprised to find the rest of his new squad staring at him. "What? Just saying hi...is all." He sniffled again before he could stop himself.

"Of course," Judy said, smiling way too innocently. He took one look at her upright ears and realized she had heard everything. Still smiling, the bunny moved one paw across her mouth in a zipper motion and shot him a thumbs-up.

_I am so glad she uses her powers for good._

"Glad you got  _that_ giant loose end tied up," Bogo said impatiently. "Anything else?"

"Actually, I was kind of wondering why I smelled  _my dad_ in there," Nick said, watching Judy's smile quickly disappear.

"W-Well,  _I_ want to know what happened at the hotel," she countered.

"I'm pretty curious about both of those things," Jimmy admitted.

"And  _you."_ Nick turned to Jimmy. "I still want to know how Carla has a mate and, of slightly more importance, how she betrayed us."

"Carla betrayed us?!" Judy yelled. "Is  _that_ why she's not here?! I asked Jimmy about that and he used the plushie to dodge the question!"

" _Did you ask Jimmy about that? Yes, yes you did."_

"Alright, ALRIGHT!" Bogo finally stomped the floor hard enough to shut them up. "Clearly, we could  _all_ use a bit of catching up. So let's get in the car, drive to the Docks, and we can regale each other on the way. Sound good?" He paused. "Oh wait, you don't get to decide. I do. Let's go!" Bogo spun on a hoof and stormed off.

"To be honest, I'm most curious about how you got the  _chief_ on board with this," said Judy.

"Pain and sacrifice, Carrots. Pain and sacrifice."

* * *

_Savannah Central_

_10: 10 PM_

"There. All caught up. Does everyone feel better now?" Bogo asked, pulling up to a stop sign.

When he got no response, he looked back at his passengers, who were all rooted in their seats with wide-eyed, gaping expressions. His question snapped them out of their stupor.

"Dad snuck into the hospital and tried to kill you?! That  _dick!_ And he totally beat me to visiting Mom so now I look even worse! I was gonna bring her to visit my new house, but apparently I don't  _have_ one anymore!"

"I can't believe Carla's been  _spying_ on us this whole time! And she's married to a rat?!  _And_ she's a masked wrestler?! You think you know a mammal…"

"That's so awesome how Judy got to meet Nick's mom and Nick got to meet Nick's dad! I mean, not for either of  _them_ really, but it's still really cool that you met up at, like, the exact same time! Funny how that worked out."

" _Foxes and bunnies! Living together! Mass hysteria!"_

"Guess not." Bogo turned back to the road and continued driving. "You think that's hard to handle? Getting all of that dumped on you at once? Well, guess what, that's  _my_ job, each day, every day. Mammals always notice the officers out there in the field, solving cases, busting perps, but  _I'm_  the one who gets all the bombs dropped on him and has to keep them from exploding."

Nick, Judy, and Jimmy shared uncomfortable glances with each other.

"In other words: suck it up, we've got a job to do!"

They breathed a collective sigh of relief, shoving the mind-blowing revelations aside for the moment and focusing on the task at paw.

"Good. Now, we're almost there, so it's about time we came up with some kind of plan." He watched as the scenery around them became a lot more wooden and began to stink of fish. "Wilde, this is all your fault as usual, so what have you got?"

Nick cleared his throat. "Actually, I  _do_ have a plan. First, we're going to find an entrance to-"

The car's police radio crackled loudly.

"Annnnnd, there goes my train of thought."

"It's just the station giving me an update, don't be so melodramatic." Bogo huffed in annoyance and picked up the radio. "You have even worse timing than usual, Clawhauser. What is it now?"

The voice that came out was low, cold, and definitely  _not_ from an obese cheetah. " _I'm sorry, Officer Clawhauser can't talk right now. He's a bit...tied up at the moment. Ugh, damn fox is rubbing off on me."_

A chill ran up Judy's spine as she recognized the voice instantly. "Simon VanDal!"

" _Ah, so the ZPD finally knows my last name. Congratulations, it only took you a year longer than everyone else."_ He clicked his tongue. " _I meant a week. They do say that passage of time is the first thing to go…"_

"What are you up to?!" Bogo demanded.

"And did you seriously take  _Benji_ hostage?" Nick asked, shaking his head. "That's like kicking a very rotund puppy."

" _Be that as it may, he makes for good bait, don't you think?"_ He quieted down and shifted the radio he was using so that they could hear the feline's muffled pleas for help.

"I hope you don't think it's going to be that easy," Bogo warned. "I know it may seem like it sometimes, but Clawhauser and I aren't the only ones who hang around the main building!"

" _I'm well aware,"_ the raccoon replied, far too calmly for comfort. " _In fact, I count...one...two…"_

Bogo's bravado faded.

" _...three...four…"_

Nick and Judy looked at each other uneasily.

" _...five...six…"_

Jimmy hugged Wallace tightly.

" _...and Clawhauser makes seven._ Now  _are you going to take me seriously?"_

Bogo swallowed a lump in his large throat. "You expect me to believe that you took down seven...six highly-trained ZPD officers?"

" _Do you require proof?"_ Without waiting for an answer, a gunshot sounded from the other end. They quickly heard several more muffled cries in response, practically filling the vehicle with palpable dread. " _It wasn't easy,"_ he admitted. " _It wasn't particularly hard either. I imagine it_ looked  _pretty impressive though, choreography-wise. Shame you couldn't see it."_

"What are your demands?" Judy asked it without thinking, just echoing her knowledge of how to handle hostage situations. Bogo knew the protocol as well and let her speak.

" _Good. I knew I could rely on Officer Hopps to get straight to the point. Here's the deal: whatever asinine road trip you're all on, you're going to turn around and come back to the precinct_ now.  _I'll be keeping a lookout for your squad car. Oh, and if I see anyone_ other  _than you try to approach the building, I'm going to shoot the stripes off of Fangmeyer here."_

There was a loud, yet still muffled outcry of indignation. " _Hmm? Have something to say about that?"_ They heard the raccoon's footsteps move across the floor, alternating between pads and peg, followed by the ripping of tape. " _Now what was-?"_

" _I'm Delgato!"_

" _Oh."_ Apparently not the reaction  _any_ of them were expecting. " _Are you sure? My cheat sheet says you're a lion."_

"You're  _lyin'!"_

His mouth was quickly taped shut before the raccoon addressed them again. " _Hope you remember those names better than I do. You'll need them to notify their next of kin unless you hurry. VanDal out."_

"W-Wait! I-!" Judy's heart sank as the radio clicked off. "Chief Bogo?"

"I'm already on it," he said grimly. "Don't tell anyone about this." He immediately made an illegal u-turn, flipping on the siren and nearly flooring the pedal as they raced back to the precinct.

They had only just glimpsed a large, fish-shaped sign that read, "WELCOME TO THE DOCKS! ZOOTOPIA'S MOST INTERESTING DISTRICT EVER!"

"Don't worry, Carrots. It's false advertising," Nick said, though his usual sense of mirth was completely absent.

"I don't get it," Jimmy said, shaking uncontrollably. "How did he know we had just left? Did Clawhauser tell him?"

Gritting his teeth behind the wheel, Bogo's eyes suddenly widened. "Karen VanDal...she set us up!"

"Simon's...wife?" Judy asked, still trying to get a grip of everything she'd only just learned about him. It was hard enough coming to terms with him having a missing prosecutor son.

"Of course," Nick growled. " _That's_ why she looked so cheerful when she left the ZPD. It was all a trap. She knew we would look into her background after that interrogation, that we would find her connection to Simon and that we would come after her in response. All to lure us out of the building while her hubby moved in."

"But that doesn't make any sense," Judy reasoned. "If they want us back there now, why did they have to get us out in the first place?"

He shrugged. "Probably because they're too scared of tangling with the chief while he's on his home turf."

"Your attempt at brown-nosing aside, you do have a point," Bogo said, swerving around some slower vehicles...which was everyone else on the road right now. "As police chief, I am granted certain privileges that could have prevented this from happening. The emergency lockdown protocol for instance."

"Whoa," Jimmy breathed, as easily-impressed as ever. "Can the precinct turn into a giant robot too?"

"We don't have the budget for that."

"It doesn't matter anymore," Judy said resolutely. "Simon's in there now and we need to get him out. Or to a holding cell, whatever comes first. Got any more ideas, Nick?"

"Oh sure, just because I have a plan for dealing with a giant stabby-fish, clearly I have a plan for everything," Nick huffed.

Judy faltered. "I'm sorry...I didn't mean…"

"Of course I have a plan, Carrots." He smirked. "You haven't been apart from me  _that_ long, have you?"

"Just because we're in a crisis situation, that doesn't mean our deal no longer stands," Bogo reminded him.

"Noted. Okay, here's what we're going to do…"

* * *

_Construction Zone_

_10: 11 PM_

Meanwhile, Finnick was busily finding out that large ears and power tools did not mix. "Urrgh...why do they have to be so damn loud? I swear, if someone starts a howl, I'm gonna…"

The wolves would never find out what he was gonna do because he spotted Koslov first, sitting still as a statue over the sloppy tracks of Reynard's Countmobile. "Are you still  _here?"_

"The Count has not returned. He is taking long," the polar bear replied, not even looking at him.

"It's been, what, an hour or two at most?" the fennec asked. "Guy's got some serious issues to work out, on top of the ones he already started with. That's gonna take some time. Take it from someone whose best friend used to hang out under a bridge."

"Still…" he said, uncertain.

"You're worried about him, huh?" Koslov turned to glare at him. "Hey, I won't give you any crap about that. I get it. I'm pretty attached to the big idiot's little idiot too."

"Do not insult the Count  _or_ his little idiot."

"I still remember the first time I met Nick," he continued, ignoring him. "It was pretty soon after Mr. Big kicked him to the curb, so I can't say I hold much against you for icing him, but Nick was sitting there in the snow, looking so lost and pathetic that I couldn't help but feel sorry for him."

"So then you asked Nikolai to be partners?"

"Heck no! I threw a snowball in his face and laughed!" It was very similar to the laugh he made right now. "But then he threw a bigger one back at me and I knew then that this was going to be something special. By the end of the day, we were both shivering and frost bitten, but we'd formed a bond. And, well, I was short on cash, so why not give him a shot?" He very,  _very_ slightly smiled.

Koslov was not impressed. "Is that really entire story?"

"Screw you too. How'd you and Reynard get so chummy then?" Finnick snapped back.

"He ordered borscht...and I brought him borscht."

"Fascinating. But here's what I'm getting at: foxes are crazy. He didn't make that his dumb catchphrase for no reason. And we have a reaaaal tendency to seek out others like us, who make us feel better about being so damn unhinged all the time."

"I am not sure I appreciate implications."

"What, like it's any kind of secret?" he asked pointedly. "Heck, just look at the kind of psychos we've already had working with us. That peg-legged raccoon who seems to hate everyone, that bloodthirsty bat who drinks rodents dry and I'm pretty sure  _gets off on it,_ that pyro skunk guy who...seems to have up and disappeared. Am I the only one who noticed that?"

"So what you are saying is that the Count will come back to us?" Koslov worked hard to put this together. "Because we are...like him?"

"Honor among thieves, right? A guy like Reynard doesn't get as far as he does without knowing how to adapt. He'll bounce back, somehow, and when he does, he'll have his own dysfunctional crime family to return to." Finnick plopped himself down next to the bear and cracked open a bottle of mooze, then tossed him one.

Koslov caught it and smiled down at the much smaller mammal, who seemed much less annoying without a hundred tranqs doing the talking. "Ironic, isn't it? That now  _I_ am one with doubts and  _you_ are offering reassurances."

Finnick raised his bottle to his lips. "I'm just waiting to see how this all plays out. To Wilde."

"To Wilde."

The two mammals toasted and drank, watching the wolves continue their work in silence.

_Here's another lesson for you, dumbass: keep your friends close and your enemies closer. You better appreciate what I'm doing for you, Nick._

* * *

_Zootopia Police Department - Precinct 1_

_Parking Lot_

_10: 17 PM_

"Alright, everyone. Stay calm, keep your focus, remember the plan, and forget every one of the driving laws I broke getting here." Bogo pulled to a stop right in front of the main entrance, visibly discouraging anyone else from trying to gain access.

"Doesn't look like anyone else has showed up yet," Judy observed, climbing out.

"For the safety of everyone inside,  _good._ I'm not about to risk their lives calling on anyone else. We're on our own here."

"Business as usual then," Nick said. "For a second there, I was worried this might be too different for us."

"I don't know, Nick…" Jimmy pointed slowly inside. "... _that's_  pretty different."

Judy paled. "Oh sweet cheese and Clawhauser."

The glass doors gave them a pretty good look into the building and the sight before them was not reassuring. Seven officers, seven friends _,_ turned into seven hostages. Wolford and Fangmeyer were tied together back to back, their wrists and ankles zip-tied and their snouts muzzled. Delgato was similarly bound to a support column, grimacing through the tape reapplied to his mouth. McHorn and Grizzoli were tied together on the floor in such a way that their tremendous weight kept either of them from getting up...though the multitude of tranqs sticking out of them probably helped too. Trunkaby was also tranqed, tied, and tethered to another column with her own trunk. In the center of it all was Clawhauser, tied to his chair and gagged with his own box of donuts.

Simon plucked one out, twirling it on his finger as he kept his Silver Centurion revolver pointed calmly at the cheetah's head. Perhaps most concerning about all of this was that despite the visible injuries they could see on their fellow officers, the raccoon had a few scuffs on his jacket at most. As soon as he noticed them staring, Simon tossed the stray pastry into the air and shot it to pieces. Disregarding Clawhauser's cries of despair, he picked up his radio and spoke to them again. " _Not a bad response time, I admit. Though if I were a less patient mammal, someone would be dead by now."_

Bogo stood outside the car, pulling the radio from inside with him. "What is this about, VanDal? Did Count Reynard put you up to this?"

He snorted derisively. " _I'm afraid the Count and I have gone our separate ways. I'm the one running this show, and if you want your fellow officers back alive, I suggest you follow my script."_

The chief was trying hard to keep himself in check. They all knew how much he hated submitting to criminals, but he was left with little other choice. "We're listening."

" _I assume at least some of you are familiar with the Kyle VanDal case, including the more...interesting rumors surrounding it…"_

"I am."

"Me too."

"Sure do."

"Uh huh."

" _Yeppers."_

" _...Alright then. That makes things easier."_ Even though he was still very much in control, something about the raccoon's demeanor was definitely bothered by how much he was getting caught off-guard. Hopefully, that was something they could use to their advantage and not something that would get them killed. " _I'm in need of further information on that case and you're going to get it for me."_

"You mean the ZPD database?" Nick asked. "Good luck with  _that,_ pal. We just looked up that case before we left and found diddly-squat."  _Like the chief said, they're not just gonna put something incriminating there for anyone to find._

So then why did the chief seem so unnerved by this?

Simon smiled. " _Ah, but did you look in the restricted section? The one that requires the police chief's security clearance?"_

Nick, Judy, and Jimmy all turned to Chief Bogo. "A police chief has certain privileges," he repeated, almost guiltily. "And they are not to be invoked lightly. We already had a lead, Wilde. Something like that is only a last resort."

" _Then I'm happy to provide you an excuse,"_ Simon said before he could even respond. " _And since a conspiracy of this level would naturally go pretty high up...I'm very curious what I'll find there."_

"The ZPD didn't kidnap your son!" Judy yelled without thinking. "That's just crazy! Like-"

" _Like a fox?! Is_ that  _what you were going to say?!"_ The entire room tensed up, Clawhauser looking like he just wet himself, before Simon calmed himself down. " _My apologies...bit of a sore spot."_

"Hopps, I really shouldn't have to tell you this, but please don't antagonize the hostage-taker," Bogo advised. Judy looked away bashfully.

"Yeah, don't want to get on the bad side of  _Charles_ here," Nick quipped.

"Wilde,  _seriously!"_ Bogo thankfully had his thumb off the radio until he was ready to talk again. "I accept your terms. Do you want me to access the database for you then?"

" _I don't think so,"_ he said suspiciously. "You  _might actually be a slight challenge to deal with. Write down your ID and password, then give them to…"_ As he scanned the group, Bogo scowled at him, Nick waved, Jimmy hid Wallace behind him protectively, and Judy looked on nervously. " _...her."_

" _Me?"_ Judy asked, surprised. "This better not be because I'm a bunny."

"I'm  _a raccoon,"_ he countered. " _Call it a sense of familiarity. Better the devil that you know, right?"_

"Who are  _you_ calling a devil?" But if this was the only way to save everyone...Judy sighed. "Alright, I'll do it. Chief?

Bogo hesitated. "This is in complete violation of the chain of command, I hope you know that."

" _Oh, I know what the chain of command is. It's the chain I beat Wolfard with until you understand who's in rutting command!"_ Simon paused, pulling out a piece of paper, his "cheat sheet", and squinting at it. " _Wait, is that an 'a' or a second 'o'? It's a bit smudged."_

"Fine, you win." With great reluctance, Bogo pulled out a small notepad and scribbled his credentials into it. He passed it to Judy, making sure that only she saw it and not a very curious Nick. "Remember the plan," was all he said before sending her on her way. Judy exchanged knowing glances with Nick and Jimmy, then headed inside.

" _Not so fast. I think you're forgetting something."_

She stopped, her paw resting on the surface, then groaned and passed her tranq gun to her teammates. Nick made a grab for it, but Bogo was quick to confiscate it first. With a slightly less hopeful look, she headed inside for real.

The atmosphere was somehow much more oppressive on this end of the glass. She glanced around anxiously at her captured friends, the ones still conscious staring her right back, just as fearful of her own safety. She willed herself to ignore them and focus on Simon, who hopped off his perch on the front desk to meet her halfway, his gun aimed at her the entire time of course. "Let's get down to business."

From the outside, her teammates kept a close on the proceedings. "Alright, get ready, everyone," Nick whispered. "As soon as Simon leaves, we're going to sneak in and free everyone, then get them to quietly pretend they're still captured until we can ambush him."

Jimmy nodded. "I forgot most of the plan, so thank you for recapping it verbatim."

"I  _remembered."_

"No one likes a know-it-all, Wallace."

"Focus!" Bogo said sharply.

As Judy got nearer, the realization that Simon could literally pull the trigger and end her life in an instant was getting harder to deal with. That didn't mean she was happy about giving in to him either. She held out the notepad as soon as he was close enough, glaring bitterly. "Here. Just take it."

"Gladly." Simon reached out to grab the notepad...and grabbed her whole wrist instead, yanking Judy towards him and spinning her around, wrapping one arm around her throat and using the other to hold the gun to her head.

"Change of plans: Officer Hopps is coming with me," he said, now close enough to be clearly heard without the radio. "Just in case you had any ideas about waiting for me to leave, know that I now have  _eight_ hostages."

Judy was bitter before; now she was  _pissed._  " _That's_ why you picked me?! Because I'm the only one  _shorter_ than you?!"

"Pretty much." Simon began to walk her backwards, towards the elevator. "Do you know what your biggest mistake was? Treating me like some common criminal. I've spent years fighting far worse scum than you'll  _ever_ know. You never stood a chance." Simon elbowed the button to open the elevator, pulled Judy inside, then smirked mockingly at his helpless audience as the doors closed again.

Outside, Bogo facehooved. "If anyone has another idea, I'd love to hear it."

Nick raised a paw. "Well…"

"Not you."

* * *

_10: 29 PM_

Simon stood stock still, Judy firmly in his grasp, as deceptively calm elevator music played. Judy tried her best to relax into it. So what if Plan A was a bust? Since when did Plan A  _ever_ go right for them anyway? She just had to do what they always did: wait for an opportunity to present itself.

In the interim, she supposed she could at least do more than the typical damsel in distress. "So why  _do_ you think the ZPD kidnapped your son?"

Simon tilted his head skeptically. "Are you actually curious or are you just trying to distract me?"

"...A little of both?"

The raccoon actually chuckled. "You are one bold bunny. Fine, I'll humor you. Are you aware of the sole piece of evidence Kyle left at the scene of his last sighting?"

Judy wracked her brain to dig up that information from the pile that had been dumped on her. "His jacket, right?"

"Correct." His gaze hardened. "I gave him that jacket the day I returned from the Cold-Blooded War. It was his most prized possession. He would never leave it behind by accident, and he knew we would realize that. It was a signal to  _us_ that something had happened."

"Meaning yourself and Karen, right?" His suspicious glare darkened at mention of the name. To make this situation even more unnerving, she still had no idea where the other VanDal  _was_ or her continued role in all of this. "I'll grant that Kyle was probably taken by someone, but what evidence do you have of ZPD involvement?"

"We did some digging into the cases Kyle was working on before his abduction. We found nothing to suggest a motive for the crime." He seemed to wait until the exact moment Judy went to open her mouth again. "So we dug  _deeper._ It was then we discovered a rumor that was circulating about how Kyle was in the midst of investigating a ring of corruption within the ZPD. And that he disappeared while chasing a lead to that end."

"But that's not...you still can't…" Judy struggled to get words out. "That still isn't concrete evidence, even if it  _were_ true!"

"Perhaps not, but we never gave up searching. Following the theory that Kyle had been the target of a conspiracy, we got ahold of the security footage and re-examined his actions that day. He sat down on a park bench, then got up without warning and drove away, leaving his jacket behind. The only conclusion we could come up with was that he was being guided by someone, someone who told him to leave there immediately. So we checked the scene for evidence of anything that might have posed a threat to him."

He paused again, just waiting for her to ask, "What did you find?" Because if he hadn't found anything, they wouldn't be here.

"A sniper's nest," he said, as if he were describing something he picked up from the store. The two of them came from very different worlds indeed. "The actual weapon was long gone, of course, but we knew how to identify such a spot. There was more than enough evidence to suggest that someone had been there, aiming to kill our son." He grit his teeth. "And among that evidence was a scrap of cloth, torn in their haste to get away, which made a perfect forensic match to a ZPD uniform. But I suppose you thought I was just a delusional nut job."

Judy didn't say anything, almost feeling a bit guilty for assuming the worst of him. Then she remembered the seven hostages still in the lobby and that guilt quickly disappeared. "...Whatever your reasons, I can't forgive you for this. Maybe not everyone in the ZPD is a perfect paragon of justice, but that doesn't change our ideals, what we strive to be. If there's any roots of corruption left to yank out, you have my word that I'll find them...but only after I've dealt with  _you."_

"Eh. I've heard better."

Simon withdrew his metal leg from between the open elevator doors, finally letting them close behind them as he walked Judy out. "To be honest, I had no practical reason to tell you any of that. I only did so because your naive belief in law and order kind of pisses me off." He smirked down at her. "But you  _did_ succeed in distracting me for a good forty seconds. I'm sure your friends are very proud."

* * *

_Chief Bogo's Office_

_10: 29: 41 PM_

Judy only just registered the laptop still open on the chief's desk before she was shoved towards it. "You have the chief's credentials. Pull up the Kyle VanDal case," Simon ordered, keeping his gun trained on her as she got seated. "And don't try anything funny. I'm watching you like a falcon."

She typed silently.

"Falcons have better eyesight than hawks. In case you were wondering."

"I've never heard of either."

"Tch. Schools these days. Not even teaching mammals classes on other classes. Nevermind, just find that data."

Okay, so getting him to talk was definitely  _not_ the opportunity she was waiting for, nor did anyone come to her aid in those precious forty seconds. But she refused to give up, even as she did everything he told her to. She wasn't quite naive enough to think that her belief in law and order amounted to anything with her brains splattered on the wall.

She entered Bogo's credentials into the system and suddenly saw a lot more pop up before her eyes than the paltry case file Nick had described. Good thing  _she_ wasn't one of those roots of corruption or she could do some real damage with this kind of info. She felt dirty just for glancing at the screen. "There's a lot here. Search away." She spun the laptop towards him.

He spun it back. "So you can beat your personal stalling record? No, I already have it covered." Simon reached into his jacket and pulled out a grey flash drive lined with black stripes, sliding it across the desk to her. "Download the data onto there.  _All of it._ I will look it over later."

She gritted her teeth. No doubt about it, this guy was a professional. He had some pretty professional hardware too; the data download took even less time than the elevator ride. Not even slow technology could save the day. All she could do now was pull out the drive and glare defiantly. "You won't get away with this."

"Is this the part where I say, 'I already have'?" he asked sardonically, reaching for the drive. "Because I already have."

A loud, blaring alarm rocked the building.

**Warning! Emergency lockdown activated!**

" _What?!"_ Simon looked up at the ceiling in shock. " _Dammit!_ Do you have any idea how close I was to getting out of here?!"

"I don't," Judy said, clasping her fingers and smiling in an insufferably pleased fashion. "But I kind of hope it was less than forty seconds."

* * *

_Parking Lot_

_10: 31 PM_

"What's going on?!" Nick asked, any chance of a plan shattering with the blaring noise.

"It's not possible…" Bogo gasped. "I'm the only one who should be able to activate the emergency lockdown protocol!"

"Obviously not! Screw negotiations, we gotta get in there before-NO!" Nick practically lunged for the doors as solid metal sheets slid down over top of them, succeeding only in smacking into them.

"Wallace, bust us through!" Jimmy threw the heroic wallabeanie as hard as he could at the blockade, only for him to bounce harmlessly off. "Well, I got nothing."

"Judy…" Nick slammed one fist on the sheet fruitlessly. "I only just got you back…"

* * *

_Chief Bogo's Office_

_10: 32 PM_

The alarms mercifully died down, making Judy's ears ring from the aftermath. The lights died down as well as the main power kicked off to conserve energy, casting the entire building in a dark red veil instead. It nicely accentuated how pissed off Simon VanDal was, still looking around as if a new way out would appear if he just glared at it hard enough. Normally, Judy wouldn't be very happy about being trapped in a building with one of the most dangerous criminals in Zootopia, and becoming dangerously unhinged at that, but she had always been one to see things differently.

Because  _this_  was the opportunity she'd been waiting for.

With one paw, she snatched up the forgotten flash drive. With the other, she vaulted over the desk, swinging her leg and kicking the Silver Centurion out of Simon's grip. He didn't have time to react, as her second kick went square into his face. Simon staggered back as Judy capitalized on the shift in momentum, leaping from the top of the desk and landing another kick to his chest. This one sent the raccoon into the doorway, which Judy swung from the top of to kick him again, booting him out of the office and into the glass guard rail overlooking the lobby. Sprinting towards him, Judy picked up speed and finished off with a double-footed flying kick into his wide-eyed face. "Eat  _this,_ you assymetrical jerk!"

The tremendous blow sent both of them through the guard rail, plummeting towards the floor below. Judy kicked off of Simon and propelled herself backwards, landing safely on Grizzoli's body fat. Simon himself hit the floor full force and now lay flat on his back.

Judy looked at him, still shaking from adrenaline and fully aware that her fellow officers were now staring at her in complete awe. "Yeah...Yeah! That's what you  _get!_ You thought you could just waltz in here and steal our data? Not on  _my_ watch, buster! If there's one thing you should learn from this humiliating defeat, it's this: don't mess with the Zootopia Police D-!" Simon kicked himself back up. "...oh."

"No, please, don't mind me, I'll let you finish," Simon said, casually brushing the dust off of his jacket. "You were going to say 'Department', right? Or is there another d word you'd like to substitute?"

Judy's ears flopped down. "Dagnabbit."

"Not my first choice, but I'll take it." He cracked his neck from side to side, keeping his eyes on her the whole time. "Oh, and the flash drive too. I'll be taking  _that_ right now if you know what's good for you."

Judy glanced around at the many eyes on her, all of which were openly telling her not to do what she was about to do. " _Do_ I know what's good for me?" Judy dangled the flash drive in front of her face. "No, no I do not." She dropped it into her pocket and threw up a "bring it" gesture.

There were several muffled gasps from all around her. Simon just sighed heavily. "What do you think you're doing? Trying to impress your friend, Officer…" He pulled out the cheat sheet. "...Pennington? Who the hell is Pennington? Does that one even  _exist?"_

He crumpled the list and threw it over his shoulder. "My research may have been a bit rushed, but I  _do_ know that you're nothing but a rookie.  _I'm_ special ops. Do the math on how well this is going to go for you."

Luckily, Judy was better at multiplication than division. "Trust me, this isn't going to go like our last fight."

"I should hope not because...uh...that went poorly for you?" Now he just looked confused.

She narrowed her eyes. "You have no idea what I'm talking about."

"No, no, just...give me a reminder?"

"It was a little over a week ago...?" He shrugged. "On Outback…?" He thought to himself intently. "You were at a cafe…?"

"Oh right.  _That."_ His face finally lit up in recognition...and disinterest. "Forgive me, my militaristic mind classifies things in a very particular way. I didn't classify that as a 'fight', you see. Now, if you had said 'inconvenience' or even 'annoyance', then maybe-"

Judy flung herself at the raccoon, aiming a sweeping kick to the side of his head.

He caught it effortlessly. " _Still_ too slow." He landed a palm thrust to her gut that flung the bunny onto her back. "That one I'll classify as 'mercy' if you give me the drive now. Deal?"

"Fine. Take it." Judy dug the thing out of her pocket and tossed it to him.

She leapt forward at the same time, kicking him back just before he could catch it, grabbing it again and landing back on her feet.

Simon skidded back a bit on his peg leg, but did not fall. "This isn't just stubbornness. You're not doing this just for your precious ideals. You've got something against me, don't you?" Only now did he look even remotely interested.

She didn't deny it. "You're right. This is about more than just my pride," she said, shoving the flash drive back into her pocket. "This is also about a promise I made to a friend a long time ago. A friend whose father you murdered in cold blood. I promised her that I would be the one to take you down." Judy glared at him. "And I  _always_  keep my promises."

The other officers didn't have any reaction to this, because they thankfully didn't know what she was talking about, but Simon did.

And it made him burst into laughter. "Now that's more like it! For a second there, I really thought there was nothing more to you than your one-note 'Justice Bunny' routine, but you've got some real conviction in you after all. I can actually relate." He reached up and grabbed the zipper of his jacket, pulling it down slowly. "Fine then. If you want to settle the score with me so badly, Officer Hopps, then I'll give you your inconvenience. I'll give you the inconvenience of your  _life!"_  In one swift motion, he pulled off his jacket and threw it to the side, where it landed atop McHorn's horn.

Beneath the jacket, Simon wore an orange sleeveless t-shirt, lightweight and marked with a peculiar emblem over his heart. It was circular, depicting a combat knife with a bushy fox tail wrapped around it. The writing on this emblem read:

DELTA FOX

ZOOTOPIAN ARMY

Judy didn't recognize the name, but some of her compatriots did, even Clawhauser looking way more freaked out than he did just moments ago. There was a multitude of muffled shouts that sounded a lot like strong recommendations to give up. She did not. "Delta Fox?  _Really?"_

"Why do you think Reynard hired me in the first place?" He smiled very unpleasantly at her. "I've gone through wars, Hopps. You think I can't go through  _you?"_

"I think it doesn't matter. I'm going to stand and fight either way. Besides…" She shifted back onto her legs, throwing her paws up in a basic offensive stance she learned from the academy. "...Haven't you heard? I don't know when to quit."

"Haven't  _you_ heard?" Simon fell into a stance of his own, his right foot back and his right paw pulled into a fist while his left paw was raised to show his claws. " _Neither do I."_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some long-awaited reunions in this chapter: Nick and Marian, Judy and Simon, Finnick and Koslov, the Rodentriguez family and violence. So to go over them one at a time:
> 
> Nick and Marian was probably the hardest to write. On the one hand, it needed to be emotional and heartfelt. On the other hand, she just came out of a coma and Nick is a bit stunted in the "expressing himself" department. So it had to be short, but hopefully sweet.
> 
> Judy and Simon has been a showdown practically set in stone ever since Judy made that promise to Fru Fru way back in Chapter 4. Simon kicking her butt on Outback and literally crashing in on her and Marian didn't hurt either. If anyone was going to throw down with him in the end, it was going to be her. But this is right up there with Nick vs. Reynard in terms of climactic duels, so expect a lot to go into this one. Jacketless Simon has also made an appearance on my Deviantart, so feel free to check him out. 
> 
> The Finnick and Koslov scene was honestly conceived as just a way to add more to the chapter at first, but it did give us the opportunity to show how both of them have been taking things without Reynard around to give orders. Trying to at least give Koslov a LITTLE more character beyond Drabble 1, and Finnick is perhaps taking more cues than he likes from both father and son.
> 
> The Rodentriguez scene wasn't tossed in. That was always planned. Yes, THAT was part of the outline. At least they're looking in the right places.
> 
> The answers to our reader question were interesting to say the least. We've got Upplet, who says the Wildes (understandable), and adds the Sangs using some forbidden knowledge. DrummerMax64 also puts the Wildes in first with the VanDals in second (added after this chapter, to be fair.) And then there's Grey Coincidence, who went...above and beyond to say the least, but ended up deciding on the Lang Family as the winners with Reynard alone putting the Wildes in the runner-up position, with the Rodentriguez's at the bottom and the VanDals yet to be determined. (Any results change yet, Grey?)
> 
> Special shoutout to LionKingAlex for joining the Born to Be Beta crew. Welcome aboard!


	26. Simon Slays

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case you haven't noticed yet, or just aren't following me that closely, I rather abruptly posted a new story to both of my profiles a little while back. That story was RJ, my second addition to Cimar's What If collab (and partly responsible for the year-long hiatus). While not exactly connected to BtBW, it does have many many references to it and you can expect this story to reference it right back. So not at all required reading, but...it would be appreciated. :P
> 
> Oh, and there's a big climactic fight happening too, but come on, we just HAD one of those.

**Chapter 26: Simon Slays**

_Savannah Central_

_Zootopia Police Department - Precinct 1_

_10: 50 PM_

It was only after Chief Bogo dented his hooves, and not the metal sheets blocking the doors, that he finally had to throw in the towel. The buffalo rubbed at the appendages wearily, grunting in resignation. "Alright, Wilde, I'm now open to all suggestions. What have you got?"

The fox's head slumped listlessly against the barricade. "I came up with this idea to save Judy while Charles was taking her up the elevator…"

"Yes? What is it?"

"Shot to hell now that there's a few inches of solid metal between us, that's what it is."

"Damn!" He punched the door again, wincing.

"Can't we call in a tank or something?" Jimmy asked, still nursing Wallace back to health after his brave assault.

Bogo shook his head. "Trust me, we don't have that kind of time. Besides, this is still a hostage situation. If either of the VanDals spot any kind of backup coming, it's only going to make things worse."

Nick perked up. "So you  _could_ get a tank?"

"Thanks for helping to illustrate why I didn't already." Bogo laid one hoof back on the metal plates, subdued. "All we can do now is trust that Officer Hopps keeps her cool and doesn't do anything too reckless or above her position."

The fox grabbed his prone arm, shaking it fearfully. "Chief...this is  _Judy_ we're talking about!"

Bogo's eyes slowly widened in horror. "Oh no."

He immediately resumed punching the metal.

* * *

_Lobby_

_10: 56 PM_

Those proud members of the ZPD who were still conscious and able to fully appreciate their situation could only watch helplessly as the two combatants sized each other up. Judy and Simon fixed one another with an unrelenting glare, staying stock-still as they each waited for the other to make a move. There was a long, tense silence between them, broken only by the sounds of Clawhauser nomming on his donut box.

"Oops!" the cheetah said through his stuffed mouth as a single donut fell out of place and tumbled overboard. He too could only watch helplessly as his jelly chocolate creme fell to the floor.

The instant it landed, Judy sprung into action. She rushed at Simon full-force, swerving back and forth as she did so that her impressive agility would help catch him by surprise.

It didn't work. He blocked her eventual punch, shoving her arm to the side and countering with a hook to the gut. While she was staggered, he swept her feet out from under her, and the bunny had to quickly roll away to avoid being speared on the end of his peg leg. She leapt back into a kick that he once again caught, and spun, landing her face down on the ground. Trying a different approach, she sprung back up and now jumped clear over his head, aiming for his back. What kind of blow she was even going to try she didn't get to fathom, for Simon whipped his head back and caught her below the chin. Her vision went hazy, and before she knew it,  _he_ was behind  _her,_ hooking his elbow around her throat and squeezing tightly.

"So I'm really curious how you were  _expecting_ this to go," he said, letting Judy writhe in his tight grip. "Because I thought I made it pretty clear that it wasn't going to end well for you."

"I...won't...give...in!" she choked out, squirming defiantly in his grasp.

"No one's denying that you've got the willpower, Hopps. But this isn't an anime, and you're not the brave magical girl who's going to overcome all odds to beat someone way out of her league. So take a hint!"

Judy stomped hard onto his good foot, managing to slip away for a whole half-second before he grabbed her by the ears. Simon pulled her into a rotation and spun her around a few times until the flash drive she was hoarding fell out of her pocket and clattered onto the floor. As soon as it did, he threw Judy bodily across the room, watching her hit the central column and fall behind the desk. Clawhauser did his best not to make eye contact.

Simon picked the drive back up and looked it over briefly just to make sure it wasn't as damaged as the bunny it came from. Nodding in approval, he slipped it into his jeans and went to grab his jacket that he was starting to think he should've never bothered taking off.

A few paces there, he stopped, sighed, and sidestepped to the right, letting Judy's flying kick sail past him. Judy spun on her heel and launched another kick back at him, which he swiftly dodged, delivering a kick of his own in response. Between her legs. With his metal prosthetic.

All the officers watching cringed and "Ooooooooh"-ed, mutually thankful that it didn't happen to any of them. Judy let out a squeak several pitches above her normal octave before Simon tossed her back across the floor. "I'm just going to assume you didn't learn anything from that experience."

"Actually...I did…" she strained weakly, propping herself back up with Trunkaby's trunk. Managing a small smile, she waved the flash drive in front of him. "I learned that your fancy military training didn't guard you against pickpockets."

Simon gasped, digging into his pocket out of sheer reflex and glowering at her when it naturally turned up empty. "Clever girl."

"You know it," she replied, projecting far too much confidence for someone who'd just spent the last few minutes getting her fluffy tail handed to her. So maybe going toe-to-toe with Simon VanDal, Mr. Murder on Metal,  _wasn't_  such a good idea. But that was fine. She didn't need to win.

She just needed him to  _lose._

Because if there was one area where she knew she could beat a crippled old raccoon, it was speed. Judy dropped the flash drive back into her pocket and took off down the hall. "Catch me if you can!"

Simon needed a second to register this, having fully expected the rabbit to throw herself back at him again. The next second, he shrugged and turned around to head back up to the chief's office. He had other ways of retrieving that data, even if they weren't as convenient. No reason to get involved in what would surely become a lengthy and convoluted chase around the building. The rabbit could have the damn drive for all he cared. He wasn't stupid enough to leave anything incriminating on it.

He stopped.

Wait...did he still need her passcode? Did the system lock him out by now? Would he be able to get through Chief Bogo's security questions? Oh, how he longed for the old days of just having to go through the phone company. Things were so much simpler then.

Simon became aware that he was being stared at. The bound and gagged officers surrounding him were starting to look more confused than frightened. It made him unusually self-conscious.

"Hmph. Rabbit season it is." Flexing his fingers, he took off down the hall after the fleeing bunny.

* * *

_Hallway_

_11: 03 PM_

After what felt like an eternity of running, Judy rounded a corner and screeched to a stop in the middle of the hall, catching her breath. She didn't remember the precinct being this big. Nevertheless, she hadn't heard any sign of pursuit in some time now, so she was certain she must have lost him. Now, if she could just find someplace to hide until this lockdown thing blew over. Sooner or later, somebody out there had to figure out a way past it, right?

Later would have to suffice, for at that moment, her ears twitched. She couldn't yet see anything, but the faint clanking of metal on tile was unmistakable.  _No way. He wasn't chasing me at all before. How did he catch up so quickly?_

Simon emerged from around the corner, charging straight at her.

On all fours.

"Hey, Miss Symbol of Justice, I want to talk to you about taking things that aren't yours!"

"What, like that data you stole?" she almost replied.  _This isn't the time for banter, you dingus! RUN!_

And run she did, her previous fatigue forgotten in the blind heat of adrenaline. Unfortunately, she was quickly losing track of where she could run  _to._ These halls seemed to go on endlessly and the clanking of Simon's peg leg behind her never seemed to get any further away.

In fact...it was starting to get closer.

"Makes you wonder, doesn't it? Just how fast I was with  _both_ legs!" She didn't dare look back, even as she heard the clanking suddenly cease. It was her reflexes that saved her when Simon launched himself into the wall, kicked back off, and brought his metal leg down onto her position. Judy dodged by so thin a margin that she almost tripped over the massive crack his attack left in the floor.

 _Oh come on!_ she silently swore as she pushed herself to run even faster. That show of power got Simon's leg stuck in the floor for the few valuable seconds she needed to reach the nearest door and slip inside.

The dispatch room was even darker than the rest of the building, not even illuminated by the soft glow of computer monitors like usual. If it weren't for the red-tinted emergency lighting, she would be completely blind right now, carrot-filled diet be darned. Knowing she didn't have much time, she threw herself to the floor and scurried under one of the nearby desks just as she heard the door start to open behind her.

It was then she realized just how blind she truly was. She couldn't see most of the room, and to her growing horror, she couldn't see Simon either. Yet there was no mistaking that he was in here with her, for the pounding clanks fell away to softer clinks with each step he took. Judy's sensitive ears swiveled towards the sound, her heart beating like a jackhammer in her chest. Her paws went over her mouth to stifle her breathing. She went still, not daring to move for risk of making even the slightest noise.

Simon crept along the rows of desks, going full commando-mode with his senses on high alert. "You're not the first snake in the grass I've had to flush out, Hopps," he said in a deathly calm voice. "I got well-acquainted with one during the war. He was an actual snake, in actual grass. He's also dead now. That's the moral of the story."

 _Think,_   _Judy, think! There has to be some way to catch him off-guard!_

She looked at the desk across from the one she was hidden under. It was Trunkaby's, as evidenced by the extra-large computer sitting atop it. It was made for a large, fingerless mammal, reinforced to all get-out to resist wear and tear from both hoof contact and trunk mucus. As a result, the thing was nearly two hundred pounds of metal and reinforced glass. And the keyboard made for an interesting game of Twister.

Hearing the steady rhythm of Simon moving ever closer to her hiding spot, Judy got an idea.  _Sorry, Francine, but I need this more than you do!_

A subtle scraping of claws on linoleum alerted Simon to where his quarry was hiding. Smiling, he ceased purposely letting his leg hit the floor hard enough to make a noise. He'd done it only to make the rabbit panic and it seemed to have served its purpose.  _Poor little snake._

He zeroed in on the noise, now moving with absolute silence. Once he started hearing quiet, rapid breathing, he knew he had the right spot. He lunged around the corner to grab Judy, but didn't quite get what he expected.

Two feet crashed into his nose and sent him reeling back, right into the perfect position for Judy to put her plan into effect. Thanks to its odd construction, Trunkaby's computer was very top-heavy. One hearty pull of the bundle of cords through the hole in the bottom of the desk sent the entire thing toppling forward…right onto the startled raccoon.

Judy didn't wait to see the results, taking off through another door the moment everything started coming down. She didn't know if the move had stopped him, but she felt it a safe enough assumption that it didn't.

Sure enough, Simon crawled over the remains of the massive monitor a few moments later, only mostly unscathed. Quick as he was, he'd managed to jump back just far enough to avoid being smashed into a grease stain, but not far enough to stop it from landing on his good foot. That was the second time she had injured it. Pain sliced up his entire leg as it hit his ankle, and it spoke of his immense discipline that he only let out a small grunt of discomfort.

 _I'm not sure if I should be annoyed or impressed._ His foot throbbed.  _Nope, definitely annoyed._

* * *

_Construction Zone_

_11: 14 PM_

"Go Fish."

Koslov reached down and, with some difficulty, drew another card from the pile, pinching it between his meaty claws. "Bah. In Tundratown, if we want fish, we punch hole in ice and get fish."

Finnick facepawed, not for the first time tonight. "That's just what they called it, okay? Because the deck is the 'pool' and you're 'fishing' for cards."

"Then this bait is clearly faulty because I have twenty-five cards. I could make fan." He held the cards up in front of his face to demonstrate.

"Uh, you gotta have some complete sets there by now. Are you even trying to make books?"

"I need to make books too? I don't even have binding materials! What rubbish!" He threw his own hand at Finnick's, dispersing both across the ground and instantly turning their game into 52 Card Pickup. It was the fourth time this had happened.

Finnick set to work cleaning up. "Well, the good news is that I've solved the mystery of why nobody else wants to play with you."

"Really? Why?"

As Finnick reached for the last stragglers of the deck, a low rumbling and the shaking of pebbles on the ground warned him that they would soon be lost forever. He scurried back, leaving the cards to their fate as a familiar black limousine suddenly pulled in and ran them into the ground. The visual metaphor was not lost on him. "Oh shit, it's Reynard."

Koslov gave him a look.

"I-I mean, oh sweet, it's Reynard!"

The atmosphere around the entire site immediately shifted. Loyal henchmammals stood up straight in attention, less loyal wolves worked more diligently, and every one of them had no idea what to expect. Count Reynard's last visit had really put the "table" in "unpredictable." A table he had flipped. No one wanted to be the next table.

The front door of the Countmobile swung open and out stepped the fox. The first thing any of them noticed was his pristine suit and immaculately groomed fur, so clean that it almost physically hurt to look at. It was almost as bright as the gleam from his white teeth as he grinned, tapping his cane into the ground in a redundant move to get everyone's attention. "Hellooooooooo Zootooooooopia! Guess who's back and better than ever!"

He looked pointedly at his viewing audience. "Not a rhetorical question, FYI."

On cue, several voices began to chant. "Reynard! Reynard! Reynard!"

One of them was Koslov, who stopped for just a moment to glance down at Finnick appreciatively. "You were right. He did adapt. He has reached Acceptance stage."

"Yeah...he sure did." Finnick was stunned, trying to hide just how nervous he was by joining in with the chanting. He hadn't been lying when he predicted that the fox would adapt and recover from his sorrowful state, but he never thought it would happen so quickly. When Reynard left, he was a broken shell of a mammal. Now, he was completely back to...well, whatever passed as normal for him. It was unnatural, and that disturbed him more than he'd like to admit.

Finally, the chanting died down on Reynard's command. "Alright, alright, I missed you guys too, but let's not make it weird. This is a  _professional_  environment." He affixed his devil-rimmed gaze on Finnick, as if sensing his weakness. "Progress report, Radar. How's the HB Project coming along?"

"Uh…" Finnick didn't dare look back to check, so it was a good thing he and Koslov (mostly Koslov) had been keeping tabs. He rattled off the last thing he remembered. "They finished with the giant letters."

Reynard's expression shifted back and forth a couple times between pleasure and displeasure until it finally stopped on one, like a living slot machine. "Excellent! Just be sure to spell-check it later. I don't think literacy is the wolves' strong suit. Icebox?"

The bear looked almost elated to receive another order. "Yes, sir?"

"What's the current status on Piers Narwhalter?"

"He is...still alive?" he answered, confused by the question.

"Good. Don't want anyone kill-stealing from me when I'm not around. Hope you've all had a good rest, because we're heading out right away! It's time to rock the Docks, baby!" He pointed his cane dramatically into the distance, then lowered it a bit. "Oh wait, I almost forgot. Speedy?"

He frowned when there was no reply, calling out into the crowd. " _Speedy?_ Don't make me mark you tardy, young mammal! You don't want to know what my detention is like!"

"Coming! Coming!" Fast Tony huffed as he rejoined the group, gasping for breath. "At...your...service."

"Nice of you to join us. I just remembered that I asked you to pick up some assassins for me," he mused, leaning towards him. "Sure, it was a bit of an impulse buy, but what am I gonna tell them? 'Sorry, I don't need anyone dead today?'" He let out a barking laugh at the absurdity. "Might as well commit to it, right? So where are my murder mammals?"

Still worn out, Tony just lifted a shaking finger to point over his shoulder.

A group of five sinister silhouettes had appeared behind him, towering over the crowd of onlookers. "We're heeeeeeeeeere!" they chorused.

Reynard smiled lightly, without turning around. "You had better not be standing on my car."

The five sinister silhouettes awkwardly shuffled around, trying to get back down.

* * *

_Zootopia Police Department - Precinct 1_

_Cafeteria_

_11:22 PM_

_Alright...that should just about do it._

Her task complete, Judy sat back to admire her handiwork from the relative safety of behind the kitchen counter.

She had it all planned out. Planted in front of the double doors that led into the ZPD's cafeteria was a single tripwire. As soon as it was triggered, heavy pots would drop onto the bottles of ketchup and mustard she'd lined up nearby, squirting their contents all over the floor and creating a slippery terrain.

The counterweight of the dropping pots would, in turn, knock over a series of metal folding chairs arranged like dominoes. The chairs would land on the trays sticking out over the edge of a pair of tables, flipping them over and launching the rows of silverware she'd positioned there like catapults.

Finally, the egg timer she already had running would tick down during that moment of distraction, delivering the coup de grâce. A fire extinguisher attached to the back of a trolley cart would be set off, sending the cart hurtling into her target. Game, set, match.

Judy smiled just picturing it all. Good thing she'd spent so many long winter nights watching  _Roam Alone._

Right on cue, she heard the rapid clanking of metal approaching the vicinity and ducked behind the counter. Seconds later, Simon burst through the doors, instantly setting off her carefully-laid traps.

The tripwire sprung, the pots were dropped, and the condiments fired. They soon covered the entire area in front of the door in wasted food product, and even landed on Simon's ankle a little. "What the hell?"

Then the silverware catapults were launched. Seeing the incoming projectiles, Simon shuffled slightly to the left, and then the right, dodging them all.

The egg timer rang its alarm and the fire extinguisher went off, delivering its payload of roughly twenty pounds right into Simon. The raccoon caught the metal beast with both paws, being pushed back a foot or two before the extinguisher ran out of steam and the whole thing came to a screeching halt.

Judy's head peeked out once the carnage died down, seeing a completely-unharmed Simon standing on the other side of the counter, glaring at her. "You look really disappointed right now and that's kind of insulting."

His paw shot out and grabbed her by the collar, yanking her out from the confined space. "Don't confuse me with the idiot fox I used to work for. It's going to take a lot more than outdated slapstick to slow  _me_ down."

She glared back. "What? Like you're any better? Can't blame me for getting confused."

With a savage growl, she was slammed back against the surface of the counter, pinned down by both Simon's weight and the absolutely murderous look on his face. "Do you know how easily I could kill you right now?"

"Not as easily as I can distract you apparently."

There was a small "plop" over his shoulder and Simon turned to see the flash drive he'd been pursuing sitting inside a pool of mustard. He'd expected her to try to throw a punch or a kick, but not to throw  _that._  "Cute."

Then he headbutted her, hard enough that she was left too dazed to try to jump him from behind again as he went for the drive. With the floor left in the condition that it was, he went into a slide, gliding across the slick surface to snatch it up as he passed by. As if by magic, the drive flew away just as he reached for it, causing a very confused Simon to crash into the opposite wall.

He looked back at the still stunned Judy, now holding the drive once again. A faint glimmer of light clued him in to the nearly invisible string she'd used to pull this stunt off. Despite the trickle of blood running down her head, she managed to stand again. "Don't...call me cute."

He scoffed. "I don't like being called a pirate either, but do you think that stops anyone?"

"To be fair, you  _are_ trying to download data illegally."

Simon bared his teeth ever-so-slightly. "If you are trying to anger me into doing something foolish, you'll have to do better than that."

Judy smiled. "Crazy like a Delta Fox."

The raccoon charged forward, remembering the floor too late as he tripped into the spill. Judy didn't have time to celebrate as he recovered pretty much immediately, ketchup covering his face as he snarled hatefully at her.

_Not good. My efforts to slow him down are only making him scarier!_

So she did the only thing she still could.

She ran. Again.

* * *

_Another Hallway_

_11: 31 PM_

With nowhere to go and an increasingly incensed mercenary on her heels, Judy really wasn't sure how much longer she could keep this up. Even worse, she had no idea when, or if, help was coming. She needed a real plan, one that didn't revolve around antagonizing someone with a much higher body count.

The only one she could think of technically qualified, but how doable it would be was another story. If she could navigate all the way back to the chief's office, maybe, just maybe, she could find a way to shut down this lockdown and get everyone out safely. Whether or not that included herself remained to be seen.

And now the clanking was back.  _Give me a break already!_ She needed to lose him again, hopefully for longer than two minutes this time. She was still amazed she'd been able to set up all those traps so quickly. Without waiting for another aerial attack, she kicked her way into the first door she saw.

It was the ZPD's storage room. Kind of like the evidence room, except instead of being filled with important case items, it was mainly home to tote bags, coffee mugs, calendars, and other themed merchandise, all arranged in towers of cardboard boxes. She made a mental note never to let Jimmy know about it.

She could probably squeeze herself into a few of these boxes, but which one would make the best hiding spot? Probably not the one of carrot-shaped recorder pens that she'd somehow made much more popular, not even with their catchy tagline of "Technically saved Zootopia!". As much as she would've liked to do a comprehensive analysis of how each and every box would serve as effective camouflage, she didn't have that kind of time. In fact, she was pretty sure just acknowledging the stupid pen box had wasted most of it.

Then she saw another box, tucked away in the corner and apparently empty. It even had slots to serve as air holes. Seeing no better option, Judy rushed over to the box and opened it.

"Surprise!" Simon leapt out of the box and into her face.

* * *

_Parking Lot_

_11: 37 PM_

"Judy? Judy?! Juuuuuuuuuuudy?!"

"Jimmy, you're not helping!" Nick yelled.

"Sorry…" The arctic fox's ears drooped as he slumped over. "I'm just worried about her."

"Me too, kid. Me too..." But Nick didn't sit. He hadn't been sitting or immobile at all in quite some time. "The worst part is, I  _know_ I can think of a way to get in there and rescue her, except that I'm too busy being worried to think straight! It's like some kind of...cleverness paradox!"

"Nah, that just makes you a real mammal," Jimmy replied. Nick looked at the younger fox strangely. "You know, having feelings and emotions that make you care about others. It's not a bad thing. I mean, what's the point of being that clever if you can't even make friends and be happy because of it? Seems like kind of a waste to me."

Nick stopped moving, watching Jimmy go right back to tossing Wallace up and down playfully while humming to himself. "I...guess you have a point there, kid. What about you, Chief? Any profound advice from your corner or should I ask Wallace next?"

"Quiet!" Bogo ordered.

"Oh right, no snark."

"I said  _quiet!"_ The bovine had given up on punching the door, again, and now had the side of his large head pressed up against the bruised surface. "I haven't heard any activity in there for far too long. It sounded like Hopps was trying to fight him, like an idiot, but now they're both gone. I think she's led him away from the hostages."

" _Or he killed her and went on his merry way,"_ Wallace offered.

Bogo glared at the plushie, which Jimmy hid in his arms protectively, but decided to let it go. "No matter the reason, if the hostages are unguarded, this may be our chance to rescue them."

"Are we calling in backup now?" Nick asked.

"No. By the time they get here, we might lose our window of opportunity. We need to act now."

"Uh huh. So is this the part where you down a can of spinach and tear open the barricade?"

"That would be awesome!" Jimmy exclaimed, eagerly awaiting such a display.

But Bogo was paying no attention to either of them, walking away by himself back towards his car. Nick nodded slowly to himself. "Alright, I'm not sure which of us scared him off, but I'm going with the plush."

" _Discrimination!"_

A loud revving interrupted the potential race war as the chief's car lurched forward, zooming past all of them and into the shielded wall. "Whoa!" Nick yelped.

That single blow did far more damage than his hooves ever could, but the barricade remained standing while his bumper did not. Undeterred, Bogo shifted into reverse and went in for another charge. "Come on,  _break_ , damn you!" This one cracked his windshield.

"But Chief, what about your car insurance?!" Jimmy cried.

"As long as I don't have to deal with anyone's  _life_  insurance, I'll pay for it all out of pocket!" He crashed into it once again, destroying his headlights.

" _What a hero."_ Wallace almost sounded impressed.

"Am I the only one going to point out that this could easily destroy the car  _and_ him before that wall busts in?" Nick asked, raising a paw. It wasn't even that long ago that Carla had crashed her own car through the wall of a burning building. The chief was doing a scarily good job replacing her.

Then again, that very maneuver was the reason he was still standing here, and he owed it to both Judy and Carla to repay that debt. "Ah, heck with it." He started cheering him on. "Break that wall, break it down! Ra! Ra! Ra! Throw caution to the wind and insult its Ma! Gooooooo, Bogo!"

* * *

_Storeroom_

_11: 36 PM_

Simon had broken the laws of physics themselves to get the drop on her. How was she supposed to compete with that?

Judy had no time to react as he grabbed her by the head and slammed it into the ground, roughly twisting her arm up and behind her back. She waited for him to insult her again, to trade more one-liners back and forth, but he did no such thing. She could still see ketchup stains on him and that seemed to have crossed some kind of line. He just kept pressing her face into the floor while pulling on her arm, creating a pain so agonizing she was sure it would break any second. "Give. Me. The drive."

Judy's free arm flopped down to her pants pocket and reached inside. Simon waited patiently, still not letting up, until she withdrew her carrot pen and stabbed him in the leg with it. He hissed and shifted reflexively, allowing her to pull her legs out from under him and kick him off. She would never doubt the power of the pens again.

She searched for the nearest exit, which was no longer the door as she didn't favor her chances of slipping past Simon again. Instead, she scrambled up a makeshift staircase of boxes towards an air vent. She heard a clattering on the floor behind her as Simon yanked the pen out and she climbed faster, reaching the vent just as he started to close in.

Gripping the grating tightly, she kicked the stack of boxes out from under her, toppling them back into the raccoon. Then, still managing to hold on, she kicked the grating in until she was able to squeeze inside. It was just big enough for her, so Simon wouldn't be following, and this fact seemed to register to him as well. " _HOPPS!"_

She crawled and crawled until she could no longer hear him at all. Only the thudding of her own frantic movements registered to her now, and within this confined space, the sound was almost deafening.

Even if she considered herself pretty well-versed in the layout of Precinct 1, that didn't extend to its apparently labyrinthine ventilation network. With so many different rooms and corridors to pump air to, she had absolutely no idea where she was going. The only hints she got were the occasional peek through the other vent gratings, and she never risked slowing down enough to get a good look.

 _Don't panic, just think about this logically, Judy. The chief's office is on the second floor, so I need to go up. Get vertical first, worry about the horizontal later._ That made perfect sense to her until she realized that with the vents gradually sloping up and down, she didn't even know what floor she was still on. It didn't help that she had taken such a beating so far that her eyesight was starting to blur. With her adrenaline wearing off, the pain was returning to the forefront, slowing her movements and making each new step an unpleasant reminder of how terrible an idea this was.

So until she saw some clear evidence that she was making progress, all Judy could do was keep scrambling around, lost in the vents and her own thoughts, searching desperately for her destination. She looked through grate after grate after grate after-

" _C'mere!"_ Simon roared, his arm punching through the grate, grasping Judy's shirt, and tossing her out.

It was a longer drop than she expected, smacking against a metallic dome, then a thick pipe, before finally hitting the ground. Once she got her bearings again, she took a look around. The place she was in now looked positively hellish, old and sinister-looking machinery looming over her from every direction, steam hissing out of heated pores, and even the floor beneath her feet being hot and uncomfortable. This was one part of the building she had never been in before: the ZPD's boiler room. "I was going  _down?!"_

"You still are," Simon said calmly, landing on the walkway across from her. His eyes never leaving hers, he cracked his neck from one side to the other. "Well? Isn't this the part where you run away again?"

He was baiting her. Of that, she was certain. While her ability to evade him had been mixed so far, the fact remained that she was still holding the drive and he wasn't. She intended to keep it that way, and so she ran again.

Judy darted across the walkway, turning to look over her shoulder and expecting to see Simon hot in pursuit. He wasn't there, not even in the spot she'd left him. She leapt over a guard rail and hit the floor below, unsure if the sound of impacted metal came from her or not. Turning a corner, she shrieked as a burst of steam erupted in front of her. Sliding under it, she went off the beaten path again, hopping up to an overhanging pipe, then another, and another, until she reached the top of one of the larger mechanisms. From here, she could see the entrance to the vent she'd been forced out of. With this much height, she might just be able to make it back. As she readied herself to make a running jump, a clang from behind startled her. Whipping around, she could see nothing there, then turned back and found Simon's fist flying into her face.

Her landing was even rougher the second time, hitting the top of a grated staircase and bouncing all the way down. She ended up skidding to a stop in front of the main boiler, caged off from the rest of the expansive room and with no other way out. A sharp pain shot up her right leg and she realized to her shock that she had twisted her ankle. She wasn't running anywhere now.

Judy had truly reached the lowest point. Of the ZPD, and quite possibly her chances of survival.

She didn't even see Simon come down the stairs, but suddenly, he was there. Like a savage cat toying with his prey, he waited patiently for her to get back up, knowing he finally had her cornered. She could see traces of blood on his metal leg, recalling a time long ago when she had once been after exactly that.

Judy panted, struggling to stand, but she remained defiant, suicidally so, even now. "Do...your...worst."

"You're not...fooling...anyone," he replied, unimpressed by her false bravado.

 _Wait, why is_ he  _out of breath? I've barely scratched him!_

Judy didn't have time to contemplate this because Simon was done waiting for her. He charged forward and swung his leg, fully intending to finish this. To his surprise and her own, she actually managed to dodge it, ducking into his reach and kicking off the floor on her good leg to counter. Simon reacted quickly, his arms moving to defend himself.

But he wasn't quick enough, and Judy nailed him under the chin with an uppercut.

Simon was launched off the ground and fell several feet away, leaving a stunned Judy in his wake. She couldn't be proud of this because she had no idea how it happened. After everything she'd been through thus far, there was no feasible way she should've landed that blow. She was just waiting for the raccoon to kick jump back up and start beating the tar out of her again.

Instead, he got up much like an ordinary mammal would after being socked in the jaw, rubbing the afflicted area and groaning. Continuing to breathe heavily, he reached up and wiped a bead of sweat from his brow.

That was when she put it together. This wasn't pain; it was fatigue. Simon Charles VanDal may have been one of the most dangerous mammals to ever walk the Earth, but he was decades past his prime now, no longer able to continuously exert himself for long periods of time. And he'd just chased her through practically the entire ZPD.

It wasn't just speed she had on him, after all. Youth and vigor were pretty big advantages too. Big enough to turn this around on him? She didn't know, but for the sake of keeping this data safe and fulfilling a promise to a friend, she was sure as heck willing to find out.

Judy tried to shift into her stance again, the same one she'd taken at the start of all this. The weight this required her to put on her injured leg made it significantly less comfortable the second time. "Ow…"

Following her lead, Simon clumsily mirrored his opening stance as well, one leg back and claws outstretched. "Don't get...cocky...bunny."

* * *

_Parking Lot_

_11: 40 PM_

"Bogo! Bogo! He's our chief! If he can't do it, he'll give us grief!"

"SHUT UP, WILDE!"

As if empowered by his sheer desire to make the fox stop cheerleading, Chief Bogo grit his teeth, clenched his hoof around the clutch, and shoved it forward. His worn-down beast of a patrol vehicle heeded his final command and made one last desperate assault against the barrier blocking their way.

The metal wall buckled under the force of the blow and creaked loudly...as it failed to open. Bogo's car had finally been through enough, letting out a metallic whine of distress as it promptly broke down and started leaking oil. Bogo stumbled outside, laying a gentle hoof on its hood. "There, there, Ol' Bessie. You did your best. You've done a great service to the ZPD."

It was so melodramatic that even Nick didn't have the heart to make fun of him for it. "Geez...sorry, Chief. I didn't know, uh, Bessie meant so much to you."

"A shame she died in vain though," said Jimmy, holding Wallace comfortingly. The poor plushie had witnessed too much death at such a young age.

"Who says it was in vain?" Bogo asked. He had yet to turn around, and his tone of voice was suddenly...concerning. Taking a few steps back, he reached into his shirt and pulled out a match. "You might want to get some distance."

Jimmy was confused. "What do you mean by-?" Nick grabbed him by the back of his collar and dragged him away before he could question further, going back only to pick up a dropped Wallace that was somehow screaming at him.

"Goodbye, old friend." With a wistful smile, Bogo lit the match and threw it onto the trail of oil in front of him.

_BOOM!_

The explosion seemed to rock the entire parking lot, even from behind the dumpster that Nick and Jimmy had hidden themselves. When they dared to peek out again, Ol' Bessie had been put out to pasture, now nothing more than a pile of spare parts. Nick watched a flaming tire roll past them. "Wow...maybe I shouldn't push my luck so much with the chief."

"But as the new Carla, you gotta admit he's playing the part well."

"Right?!"

" _Think we can get him into spandex?"_

For all the spectacle the explosion had caused, the metal shell was still mostly intact. There was, however, now a noticeable hole in its surface, just wide enough for the two foxes to slip through. That left things a bit awkward for the police chief who had just blown up his own ride (and possibly life partner) to create it. As he just stood there, staring intently at it, Nick tried to break it to him gently.  _Very_ gently. "Uh...thanks for the help, sir, but Jimb-Jimmy and I can take it from here if you want to just sit down and rest for a-"

Without a word, Bogo dropped onto all fours and rammed into the hole to persuade it to be a little more generous on who was allowed through. With all the damage already weakening it, the buffalo did just that, and now there was a significantly larger hole awaiting them. "Or just do that. Hard to believe he was ever a beat cop…"

"I know! I don't think  _anyone_ could beat him!"

Nick was going to respond in an entirely different manner before he saw the sly smile on Jimmy's muzzle. "Heh. You really have grown, kid."

Stepping around the pieces of destroyed car, they climbed through the hole left by Bogo and entered the building.

The red tint hurt his eyes as soon as he stepped inside. Aside from the panicked faces of the bound ZPD officers, the front lobby was completely clear. Unsurprisingly, the chief was already at work undoing the bonds on the other officers, some of whom were only just now waking up. He was very noticeably leaving Clawhauser for last, passing right by him at least twice to free the larger, stronger, more capable officers first. It made sense, practicality-wise, but Nick felt sorry enough for him that he went straight to the cheetah's side. "Hold on, Benji. I'll have you out of there in a jiffy."

"Mmm! Mmmmmmm!" he said, expressing his undying gratitude.

Nick rolled his eyes and yanked the donut box out of his mouth. "You're very welcome, buddy."

He was crying. "My jelly chocolate creme…"

"You're wha-agh." Nick shuddered as he felt himself step in something very moist and very chocolate. Feeling like this kind of thing was about typical for him at this point, he lifted his foot and found Clawhauser's destroyed donut stuck to it. "Well, I know the first thing  _I'm_ doing when we get to the Docks." He noticed Clawhauser drooling and stared at him blankly. "You had better not tell me you still want it."

As Bogo finished helping McHorn and Grizzoli back up, Jimmy managed to gnaw through the ropes around Delgato and tear his tape back off. "Are you okay?"

"Nothing hurt by my pride." He winced as Jimmy grabbed his arm. "And my burn wounds! Don't touch!"

"Where's Judy?" Nick finally asked, wiping his foot off on Clawhauser's side before cutting him completely free. He deliberately averted his eyes from what happened next.

"Yeah, that's a bit of a complicated question," an unmuzzled Wolford replied. "She  _was_ here, but then she took off down that hallway." Rubbing his sore wrists, he gestured with his head instead. "VanDal went after her and we haven't seen either of them since."

"Which VanDal?" Bogo asked, untying Trunkaby from her trunk.

"Simon!" Fangmeyer yelled before the other wolf could steal his thunder. "Wait…do you smell that, Anthony?"

"Yeah," Wolford agreed, suddenly unsure. Closing their eyes, both wolves lifted their snouts to the sky and sniffed carefully. "Uh, scratch that. Actually, it smells like both of them are that way."

Nick let out a choked gasp. "Are you serious?! What,  _one_ killer raccoon wasn't enough?!"

"Calm down, Wilde. She's going to be fine," Bogo assured him.

"How do you know?"

Bogo stood up straight and cocked his tranq pistol, along with the seven other officers they'd just freed, even Clawhauser. "Because we're coming to bail her out."

"Oh, are we doing a thing?" Jimmy quickly rushed over and joined the pose.

Seeing this assembled force of blue pride, Nick couldn't help but feel a little reassured, perhaps foolishly so. "Alright then. Let's get to work.

* * *

_Boiler Room_

_11: 48 PM_

A burst of steam hissed from a pipe, a pipe that pumped gasoline into a burner, a burner that ignited the main boiler, a boiler that reached temperatures hot enough to sear the fur off of any mammal unfortunate enough to get too close.

It still wasn't as heated as the battle raging in front of it.

Simon struck Judy in the side with his metal leg.

Judy kicked him in the stomach in return.

Simon pulled her in by the ears and punched her in the face.

Judy pulled him back and boxed his own ears.

Simon ground his peg leg into her foot.

Judy used the other to break her code of conduct and kick him in the groin.

Simon clawed at the side of her face, and missed.

Judy aimed a punch at the side of his face, and didn't.

Judy kicked him in the ribs and staggered him to the side.

Judy rabbit punched him in the back of the neck.

Judy kneed him under the chin and kicked him into the grating.

Judy started to question her life choices because holy heck did that hurt. Which leg did she injure again? She could barely tell anymore because now they were  _both_ in pain. Along with everything else. She  _really_ needed this to end. "Stay...down…" It was a plea, not a threat.

Simon had propped himself up against the grating wall. He was panting from both pain and fatigue now. "Not bad, Hopps...Maybe you're not...the only one...who bit off more than they could chew."

He attempted to get up, only to stumble forward and cough up blood into his paw. The raccoon glanced down into it almost admiringly, before looking back at her and yelling, "Catch!"

On edge as she was, Judy reacted instantly and did just that. For all she knew, it could've been a live grenade. That he puked up, but she wouldn't put it past him.

It was actually a tooth, curved and carnivorous, that she had evidently knocked loose. It was a bit bloody and kinda gross, but it felt somehow wrong to just drop it. "You can keep that," Simon said. "Take it as a trophy...because that is the most you're going to get out of this. Do you want to know why?"

Judy didn't really, because she was pretty sure the answer involved him  _not_ staying down.

Far from it, he was now standing upright again and lumbering slowly towards her. Despite now looking significantly worse for wear than he did ten minutes ago, Simon kept on coming. "Because I don't  _matter,_ Hopps. I'm doing all of this for one reason, and one reason only: to save my boy. And for Kyle's sake, I'll make any sacrifice I need to. My other leg? Both of my arms? My eyes? My ears? My soul? Everything that I am, I will gladly give up to ensure that my son has a better life. A life that is  _nothing like mine!"_

He stopped only a few feet in front of her. Judy was too terrified to even move, or perhaps just incapable of it. Simon spat another mouthful of blood at her feet. "And in case you're still confused,  _that_ is the difference between me and Reynard."

She barely even saw him move, but suddenly he was coming for her. She had no idea how she was still standing, but her body reacted, some instinctual drive within her taking action before the rest of her could even process it. And as Simon threw a punch, she responded with a kick.

The result was exactly what you're expecting. At the same time, Simon's left fist struck Judy's right cheek, and Judy's right foot struck Simon's left cheek. There was a loud cracking of mutual bone damage, and then they broke apart, each combatant staggering back from the blow.

Neither was in very good shape afterward. Judy was afflicted with bruises, a still bleeding head injury, a loose buck tooth, bent ears, and a sprained ankle that she was definitely  _not_ giving the proper treatment. Actually, it was the same ankle she'd just plowed into Simon's face and it didn't appreciate that one bit. The raccoon himself was left with a broken nose, a black(er) eye, a bruised foot, cracked ribs, and a pen-shaped hole in his leg. This gave both of them great difficulty just standing upright, more content to just stare each other into submission until Simon finally put words to it. "Still think...your convictions...are stronger than mine?" he panted out. "Then stay standing... _I dare you..._ "

"I...won't...give…" Judy stumbled forward, trying to regain her equilibrium.

Then her leg gave out on her and she collapsed. The oh-so-sought after flash drive was jostled out of her pocket and skidded away, landing on the floor between them. If she stretched out far enough, she could probably still reach it, but it was no use. She couldn't move a muscle anymore. It was over.

"That's what I thought." Simon walked over slowly, and Judy could only watch as he bent down and finally claimed his prize. As he stood back up, he looked down at her with something between admiration and pity. "But I'll give you one thing, Hopps...that was a fight."

Bent as they were, Judy's limp ears still picked up the sound of a whooshing tranq dart before Simon did. In a better state, the raccoon would've still most likely avoided it, but that time had passed and the dart struck him square in the back. He lurched forward again, only having enough time to let out two words before falling to the floor right next to her. "Goddammit, honey."

"Love you too, sweetie." Karen VanDal casually holstered her gun, which Judy recognized as a second Silver Centurion, then moved to her unconscious husband's side.

Judy didn't question what she was doing here, or why she had shot Simon. She was too relieved to care. "Thank you…"

"Shut up. I didn't do that for you." Karen was just as terse as Nick had described, not even looking at her. "I just had an opportune moment to shoot and I took it."

Okay,  _now_ she had questions. "You...were waiting...to shoot...your husband?"

She pulled the dart out of his back, checking both it and him for signs of damage. Not her. "Well, yeah, that was the whole plan. Up until  _you_ royally effed it up. You could've just been a good little girl and played along until I made my move, but no, you had to go and be the big hero. Same result, except way harder on everyone involved. Well done."

 _These two were truly meant for each other._ "But...why?"

"Because he's an idiot," she said, dutifully applying first aid to said idiot. Judy really could've used some. "It's just like a male to go running off and hold up a police station, leaving his beleaguered wife to deal with the paperwork. He didn't exactly make this easy on me either, you know. I was just trying to get him arrested at first. Figured that 'interrogation' with the fox would give you enough of a lead to track him down, but then he went and pulled a stunt like this. So I had to improvise."

Judy was quickly putting the pieces together, proving that she at least hadn't suffered any brain damage. "The emergency lockdown...that was you."

"It wasn't easy hacking into the ZPD mainframe. Wasn't particularly hard either." She still wasn't looking at her, but Judy could hear the smugness in her voice. "After that, I was going to find and snipe the son of a bitch, but you went and made that difficult. Don't mammals have the decency to at least keep a fight in one room anymore?"

 _We were completely off-base,_ Judy realized.  _They weren't in on this together. Simon had no idea she was even involved. Karen was playing us both._

Finishing up her patch job, Karen turned her attention to the little grey flash drive that had caused so much trouble. She picked it up, examining it curiously for a moment, then crushed it in her paw like a piece of junk. "I got a newer model anyway."

Judy watched as all of her efforts literally shattered in front of her, falling through the gaps in the grated floor. "But...I...wha...don't you want that too?!"

"If I wanted that data, I would've gotten it from the network mainframe. No, it's useless to me now. I already know the ZPD had nothing to do with Kyle's disappearance. That's what I was trying to tell  _this one_ ," she tilted her head back towards Simon, "before he decided to hook up with a crime lord and start gunning down polar bears. He was never a good listener."

"Ugh." Judy planted her face firmly into the floor. Evidently, she  _could_ still move a muscle. "I can't believe I did all of that for nothing. I was so close too…"

Karen let out a snort. "Okay, you  _do_ know he was going easy on you the entire time, right?"

She lifted her head. "...I'm sorry, could you repeat that? I'm not sure I heard you over my ruptured eardrums."

Karen finally looked at her, and she looked at her like she was the biggest moron to ever crawl out of the mud. "You never stood a chance, rabbit. The only reason you ever got this far was because Simon was going out of his way to pull his punches. Do you want to know how this  _should've_ ended?"

 _He blocked her eventual punch, shoving her arm to the side and countering with a hook to the gut. While she was staggered, he swept her feet out from under her, and the bunny had to quickly roll away to avoid being speared on the end of his peg leg. She leapt back into a kick that he once again caught, and spun, landing her face down on the ground. Trying a different approach, she sprung back up and now jumped clear over his head, aiming for his back. What kind of blow she was even going to try she didn't get to fathom, for Simon whipped his head back and caught her below the chin. Her vision went hazy, and before she knew it,_ he  _was behind_ her _, grabbing her head by both sides and promptly snapping her neck._

_Judy's limp body fell to the floor and Simon looked down at it with disgust. "What a waste of time. Stupid bunny." He took a second to spit on her corpse, then picked up the flash drive and left._

"Was the director's commentary really necessary?" Judy asked, more than a little disturbed.

"Yes." She had already turned away again. "I almost took him out right there actually, but I prefer to avoid witnesses."

Judy tensed up.

"Don't worry, you're fine. If Simon got the shit kicked out of him trying to spare your life, it'd be pretty rude of me to just kill you anyway. Besides, we're on the same side here. More or less."

"Yeah, this idea that Simon was trying  _not_ to kill me? Still not sure I'm buying it. Maybe at the beginning, sure, but…"

Karen reached down to Simon's peg leg, grabbing it at the top and twisting until it clicked. It slid right off, revealing a second artificial leg underneath. This one was much pointier, a sharpened blade that glimmered in the heat and looked like it could slice her in half like melted butter. "It's poisoned too, just so you know." Karen slid the duller leg back on. "You were saying?"

Now Judy was the one ignoring her. The rabbit's attention was too focused on the unconscious Simon laying beside her. She just didn't get it. By his own admission, he took lives with as much effort as he took breath. " _Do you know how easily I could kill you right now?"_ And yet he didn't. He had put himself through all of this just to  _avoid_ killing her. Why?

 _He was willing to make any sacrifice he needed for Kyle's sake, but he still didn't want to if he could help it. Simon, you creep, how am I supposed to keep hating you_ now?

She could swear his motionless expression was somehow smirking at her.

There was a loud thundering of paws and hooves coming from above. Her friends. Karen looked up, unconcerned. "So much for no witnesses. You rest there, I'll do the talking."

"As if," she hissed.

"That wasn't a request."

Karen stomped on her head and Judy's last vestiges of consciousness slipped away.

_You know what? He's defeated, he's getting arrested, justice has been served. I'll take it._

_And now I'll take a nap._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so this wasn't exactly the big climactic fight we were building up to, but it's how we always knew it was going to go. Even though this story doesn't exactly go out of its way to adhere to realism, let's face it: Judy stands absolutely no chance against someone like Simon in any kind of fair fight. Hence the sudden shift to a long cat and mouse game in which we attempt to write a thing called suspense. And a wacky Home Alone parody, but mostly suspense.
> 
> Basically, this entire chapter was all about subverting expectations. Judy lost the fight, although she won in other ways, the cavalry doesn't arrive in time, Karen turns out to be quite the manipulator, and Simon isn't a very good husband. I'd say the VanDals just shot up a few notches in the most effed up family rankings.
> 
> Next time, we finally arrive at the Docks, meet Reynard's new assassin team, catch up with a certain angry luchadora, and kick more expectations to the curb.
> 
> Shoutout to LionKingAlex, our new beta, and his story "The Sound Designer." It's a fun little mystery/personal growth story with quirky characters and a unique case involving non-sentient reptiles. Much like "When Instinct Falls" and "Death Becomes You," it also has a minor crossover with BtBW in the form of Jimmy Frost, who is a guest character there. So check it out if you're interested and not too attached to WildeHopps. (I know I just lost half of you there, but still plugging for the other half.)
> 
> Shoutout to Pandora for coming up with the name "Roam Alone."


	27. It's a Hard Dock Life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> April Fools! It's an actual update! Betcha didn't see that one coming!
> 
> Alright, enough teasing and sidetracking, let's begin the Narwhalter arc. This is quite a busy chapter with a lot of new elements introduced, so hold on tight as we "dock" for landing. (This is arc five. Don't expect an apology for any quality of pun at this point.)
> 
> In other news, this chapter marks Born to Be Wilde passing the sacred 200,000 word milestone! In celebration, (and certainly not by complete coincidence) the BtBW TV Tropes page now has new subpages, including a Character page! It still needs a lot of work, especially for the less prominent characters, so anyone who's familiar with the site, please lend a helping hand if you can. Thank you.

****

**Chapter 27: It's a Hard Dock Life**

_Zootopia Police Department - Precinct 1_

_Interrogation Room_

_12: 01 AM_

_Dear Fru Fru,_

_This is your good friend, Judy. How have you been? Are you enjoying your new home in Little Rodentia? I bet Little Judy is happy there. Big Judy is still banned from coming within twenty feet of the place, but feel free to visit sometime. It might have to wait until I recover though, as I happen to be a bit under the weather right now._

_Oh, guess what? I fulfilled my promise to you today! Technically, it was yesterday now, but who's counting? I ended up pulling a bit of an all-nighter at work to get it done. It doesn't matter though because it let me face the mammal who killed your father. Did you know that he's a war veteran with decades of combat experience? Me neither! What a hilarious circumstance that turned out to be!_

_But I did knock his tooth out. I enclosed it with this letter so you can hang it on your wall or turn it into a coffee table or something. Have fun with it! He almost knocked MY tooth out actually. Wouldn't that have been funny? Instead, he just beat me bloody, fractured several of my bones, and I'm not sure I'm able to have children anymore. But he sure didn't get my tooth! That will always remain a symbol of the promise I made to you. Because much like a tooth, it was pretty much forced on me._

_Don't worry though. Even though he kicked my butt a little, a lot actually, he was arrested and brought to justice in the end. Hopefully, that knowledge will bring you peace of mind and allow you to move on._

_If not, tough biscuits._

_Your friend,_

_Judy_

_P.S I apologize for the sloppiness. Writing letters this small is very challenging. Maybe it will get easier once my paws stop shaking uncontrollably._

Judy looked down at the completed letter in her lap, then up at Nick standing over her. "That doesn't sound too bitter, does it?"

"Bitter? What? Noooooooo."

While Judy had suffered no serious brain damage during the fight, discounting whatever led her to pick it in the first place, her ability to recognize sarcasm might have been impacted. "Okay, good."

"You should be in the hospital right now," Bogo said, as disapproving of her methods as ever. "You're a mess, Hopps."

It was an accurate description. Most of her bruises had gotten surface-level treatment, but now she was just covered in bandages that made her look even worse than she felt. And she felt pretty awful too. "I  _can't,"_ she insisted regardless. "We need to get to the Docks as soon as possible. We can't afford to jump another week later while I recover."

"I hate to say it, but that makes  _you_ the smart one here, Wilde."

Nick shrugged, remembering his own term as a medical mummy. "Honestly, If I knew back then what I do now, I'm not sure I would've stayed in bed either."

He shook his head. "You're both hopeless."

"How do you think that nice lady's doing?" Jimmy asked, his nose pressed up against the one-way glass.

"You mean the 'nice lady' who broke into the precinct, hacked into our mainframe, and shot her own husband?" Judy asked, scowling. "I can't believe we're just letting her interrogate him like nothing happened."

"There's nothing we can do," Bogo said, not sounding any more pleased about it himself. "According to her, she was just coming back here to pick up something she left behind when she got caught up in the lockdown. So she wandered around looking for a way out until she saw Simon and took the chance to be a Good Samaritan. That's all."

Nick raised a paw. "You forgot the part where we burst into the room to save the day and she rewarded us with a nice, slow, condescending clap." He put on a screechy imitation of her voice. " _Wow, the cops really do always arrive late."_

"But that's ridiculous!" Judy exclaimed. "She  _told_ me about it! Her whole sordid plan to catch Simon!"

"Which means absolutely nothing without evidence, and she left none," Bogo said bluntly. "It's your word against hers."

"Actually, it's…" Judy paused, then sighed, "...exactly what you said, yes." She was starting to regret not holding onto that carrot pen.

"You know what I  _don't_ miss about being a cop?" Nick asked, slumping up against the wall. "Legal loopholes."

"You're free to give that badge back anytime, Wilde," Bogo said, turning to face the window. "But she had better get something worthwhile out of him. If we're losing ground for the sake of  _another_ pointless interrogation, then one way or another, I  _will_ find a way to nail her tail to the wall."

"Does yelling at him about their marriage count as pointless?" Jimmy asked, pressing his eyes against the glass now. "Because she's doing a lot of that. I've kinda become familiar with what it looks like."

Bogo pinched the bridge of his nose. "Knock on the window and give her a signal to speed things along."

"Yeah, okay, sure." Jimmy politely knocked on the transparent surface.

" _HEY, LADY, HURRY THE BLEEP UP!"_

"Wallace!"

Nick had to stifle a laugh. He wasn't sure what was funnier: the startled yelp from the other side of the glass, or that Wallace had actually yelled "BLEEP".

That  _Jimmy_ had yelled it, he reminded himself, but getting to the bottom of  _that_ issue would require a significantly longer interrogation.

Karen's irritated voice spoke up again. "Well, I guess you're not the  _only_  one who doesn't know how to sit and listen. Wanna say hi, honey?" She moved to the side, allowing them to see Simon sitting at the other end of the table.

The raccoon was restrained in a fashion that, were it anyone else, would be comically overkill. Both his wrists and ankles were cuffed together and tethered to the table, which itself was bolted into the floor. His body was wrapped in chains, literal chains, that extended all the way up his torso to his head. And over his mouth was a firmly secured muzzle, but while the sight still made Nick a bit uncomfortable, he wasn't about to protest its use this time. At this point, he didn't doubt Simon's ability to kill everyone in this room with his teeth alone.

But he perhaps had no greater restraint than the ol' ball and chain still chewing him out. "What do you think, Simon? Care to enlighten  _all of us_  about this wonderful employer of yours? I'm pretty curious myself, about what makes a self-proclaimed conniving fox more trustworthy than your own wife."

Simon released a muffled grunt through his muzzle. "I never  _trusted_ him as far as I could throw him." He thought over that statement. "Make that a lot  _less_ far than I could throw him. The point is, I only ever worked for him because he had the resources, and because he too is a father who wants his son back. Differences of opinion on that matter aside..."

"That's  _one_ way to put it," Nick muttered.

"Uh huh. And how did that work out for you again?" Karen asked sardonically. "Did he finally help you find a lead on our dear missing Kyle? I'm going to guess no, because satisfied mammals don't shoot up a police building."

To the surprise of anyone else who had known him, especially Judy, Simon averted his eyes and bowed his head in submission. "...No."

"Didn't think so. And do you want to know who  _did_ find a lead?" Karen leaned in closer. "Well,  _do_ you?"

"...Yes."

"Yes,  _what?"_

Another sound came through his muzzle that sounded an awful lot like a subdued sigh. "Yes, dear."

"Good. Now I-"

Judy burst into the room without warning. "Then how about this? Make it worth our time and  _then_ you'll get your lead!"

Bogo didn't even try stop her. "Hopps will be Hopps…"

Simon was taken aback, less by her sudden entrance and more by the fact that she was still on her feet. "How are you not in the hospital?"

"How aren't you?"

"Touché."

"Welcome back, Hopps," Karen said, completely unsurprised by her interference. "Saved your pen for you." She tossed the carrot-shaped recorder to her, which Judy caught, accidentally pressing the play button as she did.

Simon's gruff voice echoed out of the speaker. " _Ow! Can't believe she stabbed me with a pen. Wait, did it just record that?"_

"Anyway, that was a clever bargaining tactic," Karen admitted. "But unnecessary. When he hears what I have to say, he'll gladly spill everything."

"Oh, is that so?" Simon asked, having found a little ground to stand on again. "Who is it then? I want names, ranks, and home addresses if you really want to impress me."

Karen let out an exasperated groan. "For crying out loud, Simon,  _it was not the ZPD!"_

His eyes hardened. "So you say, and so you  _have_ said, but you were there. You saw the evidence just as I have. At the time, you even came to the same conclusion. So if it wasn't some corrupt officers of the ZPD, then who? Who was it who kidnapped our son?"

Karen gave him a look. Judy recognized that look. It was the same "biggest moron" look she had given her just last night.

"Take a Wilde guess."

* * *

_Construction Zone_

_11: 19 PM_

Meanwhile, in a time where it was still technically yesterday, Count Reynard stood, appraising his new team of assassins. "They're beautiful, aren't they?"

Finnick took a step back. "They're...something, alright."

"Awwww, look at the little guy! He is  _so_ adorbs!"

"I could, like, snuggle him to death!"

"He is literally making my heart melt!"

Finnick took a step forward. "The  _hell_ did you just-?!"

A trio of white blurs surrounded him in an instant, snatching the small fox off the ground. The next thing he knew, he was being aggressively nuzzled by three arctic vixens. They were nearly identical in appearance, with matching blue eyes, gold earrings, and equally-revealing skimpy pink bikinis. They quickly caught the eye of every male (and some females) in attendance, even the wolves, whose work productively instantly screeched to a halt. Those same eyes regarded the flustered Finnick with scorn. "G-Get offa' me!" the captive fox roared, blushing profusely.

In a quickly-pulsing heartbeat, there were three polished knives around his throat, forming a triangle of death that could kill him if he so much as sneezed too hard. " _What did you say?!"_ the vixens hissed.

He gulped. "P-Please continue. And I also feel compelled to tell you that I like having my ears scratched."

"Cuuuuuuute!" they squealed. And suddenly, two of them were gently caressing his ears while the third hugged him tightly. Tightly enough to prevent escape.

Reynard cleared his throat. "It almost feels redundant saying this, but meet Pearl, Opal, and Crystal, Mr. Big's former top massauses. And assassins."

"You forgot  _that_ part?" Finnick asked meekly, tongue lolling out as he turned to putty in their paws. "I can see whhhhhhhy…" Several mammals growled at him.

"Sadly, they had a bit of falling out after he took some offense to their...provocativeness," Reynard continued. "Must have been too much for his old-fashioned sensibilities. Not a problem with me though. I  _have_ no standards!"

"All for the better," Opal said. "It is literally impossible to give a decent massage to a rodent."

"Mine wasn't that great either," Fast Tony grumbled. "Mainly because they tried to garrotte me in the middle of it."

Reynard cleared his throat again, much louder. "Let's move on, please, thank you. Next on our list is-"

" _I will introduce myself!"_

Even Reynard's rarely-shaken composure was a little rattled by that. A small, furry figure rocketed high into the air, only to land with a tremendous impact on the ground less than ten feet away. He was the most intense wallabie anyone had ever seen, wearing a fedora lined with various predator teeth, a pair of khaki shorts, and a perpetual scowl. Shaved into his chest fur was a disturbingly accurate map of Outback Island. "The name's Drummond Rane! Outbacker, CEO of Wallabeanie Inc, and the mammal who's gonna  _burn this place to the ground!"_

The physical force of the boast sent a shockwave rippling over the assembled crooks. Koslov was the only one brave enough to ask the obvious question. " _He_  used to work for Thornbrush?" Drummond shot him a fiery glare that could kill a lesser mammal.

"He was a  _business partner_ of Thornbrush," Reynard clarified. "At least for a while. Then the Drop Dead Bear tried to cut him out so he could get his own line of toys and things quickly turned sour. It made our friend here so hopping mad that once I took Thornbrush out of the market share, he decided he owed me a favor."

"Which I wish I had been told  _before_ I went to recruit him," Fast Tony complained, rubbing at an unseen injury on his backside.

"Don't be such a wuss!" Drummond barked. "You don't look like a naturalist to  _me!"_

Reynard grinned. "Oh, I  _like_ this guy!"

"Which reminds me...I have a gift." The wallabie turned around, cracking the very Earth under his feet to face the fox. "Consider it a service for helping to rid the world of those uncomfortably naked freaks."

Several of those uncomfortably naked freaks were nakedly freaking uncomfortable with this line of dialogue, but none were dumb enough to speak up about it. The dumb one was a new recruit who didn't know any better. "HEY! BEING LOUD AND BOASTFUL IS EL ORGULLO'S SHTICK! EL ORGULLO DOES NOT APPRECIATE LOSING THE SPOTLIGHT TO A PUNK WHO PLAYS WITH DOLLS!"

The suited lion barely finished that sentence when a mammalian meteor came down on top of him. "DRUMMOND...RANE!"

When the dust cleared, El Orgullo was nowhere in sight. Only a lion-shaped crater was left behind. "Give him a week and he should be able to climb back out. Now as I was saying..." Drummond made another unnecessary leap back in front of Reynard and lifted the fedora on his head, revealing what was unmistakably a Wallabeanie. It was orange in color and wearing a black suit with a pair of shades. In one of its tiny paws was a pen attachment with a cap shaped like a fox head. On its back was a pull string. "Pull it to make it say a quote and stab someone."

"How relatable!" Reynard immediately pulled the string, because why wouldn't he?

" _Watch out, everyone! There's a fox in the henhouse!"_

The plushie stabbed its pen down at Reynard's paw, but the fox was fast enough to evade it. "Whoa-ho, he's a spunky one! Reminds me of myself, in a way. I think I'm gonna call him 'Reynard Junior', RJ for short." He hooked the pull string around one of his belt loops, tying "RJ" securely to his waist, then looked back at Drummond. "You're already so much more fun than Peggy.  _He_ never got me a Wallabeanie even when I asked."

"Fool. He deserved to die."

"I...I didn't say he was dead."

But Drummond Rane had already hopped away, awaiting his chance to shine again.

Another voice spoke up in his place. "I don't know how I'm going to top  _that_ entrance, but I can certainly try!"

Stepping forward now was a cheetah in a red conductor's tailcoat and pants, carrying what appeared to be a large coffin next to her. Her spotted fur was patterned with an impossibly-contrived assortment of music notes. "Piper Piedmont, also known as the assassin Melodía. Pleased to make your acquaintance, everyone. I'll give you a performance you won't soon forget!" Her voice was insufferably posh and flowery, as if she were perpetually standing on a recital stage.

"Piper here is the former squeeze of Sandcat Sanchez," Reynard explained. "From what I hear, many a symphony and erotic fanfiction has been written about their exploits. Up until he dumped her anyway."

"It wasn't me, it was him," she insisted.

"Surprising," Koslov noted. "Musical cat seems like perfect match."

"You would think," Reynard agreed. "Perhaps a demonstration is in order,  _Ms._ Piper."

"Certainly, darling." The feline bent down to open the coffin, which was apparently an instrument case, and pulled out a violin made of polished wood. It smelled suspiciously of blood. With a razor-sharp bow, Piper played a melody for them. It was relaxing, harmonious, and in no way offensive to the ears.

"That explains it." Koslov nodded in understanding.

"Indeed," the feline said proudly. "But that isn't to say my music can't be used for  _other_ purposes as well." She put the violin away and pulled out another instrument, a silver flute. Closing her eyes, Piper gently blew into it, producing...what seemed to be no sound whatsoever.

It became apparent that was not the case when several mammals among them suddenly started screaming, bending over and clutching their ears. The vixens were among them, finally dropping Finnick, who was even worse off himself but used the chance to gain some distance. It also affected Fast Tony and every other member of the Lang Family, whose howls of agony were a song that should never be heard.

But the look on Piper's face suggested she would make it a platinum if able. "How was that? I call it, 'Sucks to Be Canine in D Minor'."

"Bravo, bravo!" Reynard clapped uproariously, then reached up and pulled the plugs from his ears. "With a showstopper like  _that,_ I can't imagine what else you have in that case of blunt objects."

She stuck her nose in the air. "A-hem! They are blunt  _instruments,_ thank you very much."

"Okay, good, I was worried you didn't notice the joke there." As Piper stepped back towards the limo, along with three very sore vixens, Reynard turned around to face them all. "And there we have it. Pop quiz, Radar, what is the central theme among our new friends?"

" _WHAT?!"_ the fennec screamed, ears still ringing.

"Nevermind. Icebox?"

The polar bear glanced at them thoughtfully. "They are all...outcasts?"

"Correct. These exceptional mammals were all a part of something big once: the great crime gangs of Zootopia. But for one reason or another, they were cast aside by the crime lords, and now they work for me." Reynard looked upon them proudly. "This is why we're doing this, everyone. To ensure that every prospective criminal gets the chance to live up to their fullest potential, bringing all of their wonderful talents together into one big happy crime family. It truly is beautiful."

The vixens playfully shoved each other, Drummond loudly cracked his joints, and Piper flossed her teeth with a bowstring.

Finally shaking his head clear of all the white noise, Finnick walked up beside him. "I'm sure whatever you just said is really profound and all, but you're still missing a Lang Family representative. That seems kinda unlike you."

"Oh,  _am I now?"_ He winked. "As a matter of fact, I had a Lang Family representative in mind the entire time. That's why I sent him to gather the rest." He waved his cane to point at Fast Tony, who was just recovering from the auditory assault himself. "Congratulations, Speedy, you're being promoted!"

"...Huh?"

"When it comes to outcasts, truly there is no better example the Lang Family can provide. You're rebellious to a fault, disdainful of the old leadership, disliked by everyone else, somewhat lacking in the whole 'professional killer' aspect, but three out of four ain't bad. So get in there, you!" Without warning, Reynard smacked Tony on the butt with his cane, making the wolf yelp and stumble forward to join the rest of the group.

"H-Hey, hold on a sec! Don't I get a say in this?!"

"Nope!" Reynard answered cheerfully.

"Good luck," Finnick said mockingly.

"Try not to die," Koslov added casually.

"PLEASE DIE!" the wolves chorused genuinely.

"Impressive synchronization, all bonded together in their mutual hatred for you," Reynard observed. "If that doesn't prove you're meant to be here, I don't know what does."

"Aww, don't worry." Crystal wrapped an arm around Tony's quivering neck. "Whatever doesn't kill you will, like, make you stronger and stuff."

"This  _will_ kill me!" he cried.

She giggled. "Yeah, probably."

Reynard stepped towards them. "My six sitouts, my deadly deadbeats, my reprehensible rejects, it is my honor as the Count of no real nobility to hereby christen you…"

He swung his cane dramatically. "...the  _Discards!"_

The assassins grumbled unenthused responses, all while Tony kept shivering in place, eyes wide.

"Hey, I went through like five different names for you guys before I came up with that!" Reynard pouted. "I already ordered team jerseys and everything."

"So these are the guys you're sending after Felix?" Finnick asked. With that reminder, Tony started to shake even faster, letting out a high-pitched whine.

"Actually, I believe it would be more prudent now to make Felix come to us," Reynard replied. "This wolf has proven himself quite adamant about taking revenge against me and my family, for reasons I find somewhat petty…"

"Didn't you kick his mom through a window?"

"It was  _self-defenestration!"_ he shouted. "Anyway, I have little doubt that either Nicholas or I will be his next target. And where are both of us heading? The Docks."

"So these aren't just assassins," Finnick realized. "They're bodyguards."

"It's kill or be killed, as they say." Reynard leaned in close and whispered. "And should we just happen to wander a little too close to Narwhalter's lair, and he chooses to be unreasonable and attack, maybe we'll even get a freebie out of it."

"What about Tony?"

"Oh, him?" Reynard glanced back at the terrified wolf, who looked like he was about to bolt any second. "I lied. I do have  _some_ standards. Frankly, it was either this or give him to Vampirella, and between you and me, I think he got off easy."

Before Finnick could ask what he meant, still swarmed with so many other questions, Reynard was heading back to the limousine. "Alright, everyone in the Countmobile! We're going fishing! If you have to pee, do it there!"

The Discards piled into the vehicle, with Drummond reaching back out to pull in Tony as he attempted to flee. Reynard hopped into the driver's seat with Finnick on shotgun, looking up as Koslov attempted to find a spot as well. "Sorry, Icebox, but we'd need a Counttractortrailer to fit you too. Just stay here and watch the wolves for me, savvy?"

Koslov's face fell. "You mean exactly what I've  _been_ doing?"

"Yep. Don't worry, I'll bring you back something nice." With that, Reynard stabbed his cane in between the gears, right in the spot where a stick should be, and pulled it forward. "Now let's go get our catch of the day!"

The Countmobile sped out of the site, carrying with it one eccentric criminal mastermind, his reluctant sidekick, five deadly assassins, and a wolf curled up in a little ball who just wanted to go home.

* * *

_A Dark Place_

_A Dark Time_

Carla Hyenandez hadn't felt this woozy and disoriented since her Quinceañera. That was a good night. This, so far as she could tell, was not. And that was if it was still even night at all. She really had no idea how long she had been out.

Her current surroundings weren't helping matters. When she first woke up, she almost thought she was still in the ring. Though it was pitch black, her night vision let her see the distinctive shapes of the turnbuckles and ropes that surrounded her. And she could tell by the feeling of spandex against her fur that she was still in her wrestling uniform, minus the mask, though it felt somehow unfamiliar in a way she couldn't quite place. The uniform had lost much of its original sheen, covered in dirt and ripped in several places. Someone was going to pay for that.

She slowly rose to her feet, which was easier said than done after just getting the shit kicked out of her. It was also harder said than done because she was La Mala Perra and she refused to stay down for anyone. Once she was back up, Carla could see over the ropes and view the rest of her surroundings. There wasn't much else to see. The whole room was certainly built to resemble a wrestling arena, but it very clearly wasn't one. There were no stands, no visible exits, and no audience. It was a cheap parody of her beloved sport if anything.

There was one other feature that reminded her of the ring: an array of blinding spotlights that suddenly turned on, making her squint and shield her eyes. Even the added light wasn't illuminating this situation at all for her. "Guess I'm still the main event."

" _ **Right you are!"**_

As Carla's eyes adjusted to the brightness, she could see a large monitor descending from the ceiling. It stopped several feet above the center of the ring, angled down to face directly towards her. As she watched curiously, the monitor flickered on, revealing a horrifying sight. It was a white mask depicting the smiling face of a bat, painted with red splotches that were clearly blood. It looked almost clownish, and was designed in such a way that the face could only be seen when it was worn upside-down, or when the wearer was. " _ **Hello, Carla. I want to play a game."**_

It might've actually been a little intimidating if not for the familiar black catsuit plainly visible above it. "We already played a game, Sang. It was called Lucha Libre. I won."

" _ **No you di-I mean, who is this mammal you speak of? I am the notorious**_ **Jigsang!"**

"I don't watch horror movies and even I can tell you're butchering this. Also, your voice modulator sucks."

" _ **Must you ruin**_ **everything?!"** Lucy yanked off the mask and threw it aside, still hanging upside-down as she glowered at her. " _You know, most mammals I throw in here haven't seen my face before. Apparently, that dampens the effect. Noted."_

Carla lounged lazily on the ropes, thoroughly unimpressed with the performance.

" _Oh well, it's not the opening act that counts, but the main event. Welcome, Carla Hyenandez, to…"_ She spread her wings wide and grinned. " _...the Belfry!"_

The shout echoed needlessly around the empty room. "And what exactly is…" Carla did a mocking imitation of the same pose. "...the Belfry?"

" _Just my little home away from home. Consider it a trash heap of sorts for-"_

"Appropriate."

" _Let me finish! A trash heap of sorts for misfit minions who the Count no longer has any practical use for. The final resting place of broken, worthless toys."_ She smirked knowingly down at her. " _So yes,_ Joker,  _very appropriate."_

Despite her attempts at keeping a neutral expression, Carla grimaced a bit at that one.

" _You see_ ,  _la hiena de puta, you've been declared a liability. A burden. Useless. A wet sock. A brick. So your generous employer has kindly donated you to the purpose of entertaining our raving crowd! Give her some love, folks!"_ Obviously prerecorded cheering crackled through unseen speakers.

"Please. Even Sanchez's slow nights were more entertaining than anything  _you_ could ever provide."

" _We'll see about that. Tonight, you are going to be fighting for your life in a very special exhibition match, one that will make Sanchez's ring look like a sandbox at the playground. It will push you to the very brink and back, sideways!"_

Carla nodded slowly. "Sure...I  _could_ do that.  _Or_ I could tell you exactly where to shove that cheap mask of yours and leave. How's  _this_ for a heel turn?" She turned on her heel and leapt over the ropes, leaving the ring. Prerecorded booing followed her out.

" _And exactly what exit were you planning on using?"_

"Whatever exit I can find. I'll make my own if I have to."

Lucy tut-tutted behind her. " _Carla, Carla, Carla, you're so predictable. Always solving your problems with violence, always threatening and intimidating others to get your way. Never met a challenge you couldn't suplex your way out of, huh?"_

"What's your point?" she asked, still having no better idea on how she was actually going to escape.

" _Just an observation,"_ she said idly. " _By the way, how do you like your new boots?"_

Carla's anger was briefly forgotten, too confused by what appeared to be a complete non-sequitur of a question. She looked down and realized just what it was that had felt unfamiliar about her uniform. Sure enough, her stylish luchador boots had been replaced by another pair, ones that were black without the silvery trims and extraordinarily plain. Carla, for the life of her, couldn't find any reason she should care. "They take some unity of theme out of my uniform, but that's about it. What, are you going to threaten me with hot pink if I don't behave?"

" _Tempting, but no. Those are actually a very unique pair of boots you're wearing. I call them 'Hoot Boots'! Wanna guess why?"_ She leaned in expectantly.

"Because they're made of owls?" Honestly, she wouldn't put it past her.

Lucy held up a small remote. "Because they're a real hoot!" She pressed a button.

Carla looked down, concerned as she felt the new boots begin to hum and vibrate. Was the bat actually going to blow her legs off just for not playing along with her game? Unfortunately, she couldn't put  _that_ past her either.

But what actually happened was, for Carla at least, perhaps even worse. "Pffft! H-Hey! What th-heh. Hehehe. Hahahahaha!" The hyena doubled over, giggling uncontrollably. "I-I-Is thahahat the behehehest you gohohohohot?" Carla struggled to rein in the giggle fits, without success.

" _Nope. Let's try cranking it up to about half-max."_ Smiling innocently, she turned a dial on the remote.

"Nonononobwahahahahahahahahaha!" Carla was no longer able to stand, dropping to the floor and rolling around with manic laughter. She desperately tried to yank the offending footwear off, but they were practically vacuum-sealed to her ankles.

" _Right, like I'm gonna let you just take them off,"_ Lucy scoffed. " _What do you think I am, an amateur? Like a bad fashion trend, the Hoot Boots are stuck with you until you complete a series of death-defying challenges. But only to get you to cooperate. Can't have the audience getting bored now, can we?"_ A laugh track joined in on the ridicule, but it couldn't hope to match the hyena's hysterics.

Lucy pressed the button again, finally bringing Carla's torment to a stop. She stayed gasping on the floor for several moments, trying not to let the mortifying humiliation of what just happened get to her. She dearly hoped that this fake audience really  _was_ a fake audience.

" _When you're done resting up, kindly make your way back into the ring. Take all the time you need. Don't want to over exert yourself."_

No one could deny that Lucy had Carla pegged, for the hyena climbed back into the ring within seconds. "I'm...just...fine…"

Carla hated every second of this, and she hated having to do anything Lucy told her to do even more, but it was very much starting to look like going along with it was her only real chance of escape. Besides, she couldn't hide that she would get a good deal of satisfaction out of beating Lucy Sang at her own game. It might even be kinda fun.

" _Are you done justifying this to yourself yet?"_ Lucy asked smugly. " _Then let me explain the rules. You will have no time limit, and no breaks. Pinning isn't a thing either. Neither are disqualifications. The only way this match will end is by knockout. By which I mean literal unconsciousness or death. Now that-"_

"So it's not really wrestling so much as it's a street fight in gaudier clothes."

" _I suppose you could say that. But you_ shouldn't  _have, because you cut me off again!"_ Lucy pressed the button, quickly sending Carla into another peal of forced laughter. " _Let me make one thing clear: If I let you sass me before, it's only because I didn't want to spoil the surprise. But you're in_ my  _world now, Carla Hyenandez, and you'll play by_ my  _rules, like it or not! Comprende?"_

"C-C-C-Comprende!"

The boots were silenced. Carla was too. If anyone asked, this was entirely because she refused to give Lucy the satisfaction of saying anything more, and not because she hadn't yet regained the ability to speak.

" _Still, I do believe in good sportsmanship, sometimes, so how about this? I will answer for you one more question. I'm sure you have several, so choose wisely."_

Carla waited for a few seconds, to try and discern if the bat was being serious or just trying to bait her. Surprisingly, she seemed genuine, and so Carla gasped out the first question that came to mind. "Where...am I?" She almost caught herself too late. " _Specifically!_ District-wise!"

" _The Bel...dang."_ Lucy was annoyed for about half a second before her smile returned. " _Very well. I'll tell you exactly where you are..._ if  _you complete my first challenge!"_

Carla snarled. There was the catch.

" _What? Don't you like having a prize to fight for? This is information you could use to help you escape. I'd say it's a bargain."_

This  _was_ better than cooperating purely because she had been coerced into it. Carla's pride shrugged in resignation, willing to compromise.

" _Though I_ did  _expect you to ask about your mate and your fox friend and if they got out safely. Something like that."_

Now  _that_ was definitely baiting, but Carla didn't take it. "I don't need to ask. I already know how tough Priscilla is, and Jimmy has proven himself very resilient when he needs to be. They'll be just fine." And it was true. She really wasn't worried about Priscilla or Jimmy anymore. She was only worried that she would never have the chance to earn their trust again.

" _Are you suuuuuuuure?"_ Lucy prodded, but Carla's expression didn't waver. " _Oh fine, be that way. Then without further ado, let's introduce your opponents."_

"Opponent _s?"_ Carla asked. "Plural? That seems...unfair."

" _Duh, that's why it's called a_ challenge _. And you don't know the half of it. Come on out, boys!"_

With a loud whirring of metal, a panel opened on the opposite end of the ring. Something was being lifted towards the surface, but before Carla could even see what it was, she could hear the sounds of snapping and growling, as eager for blood as the bat above her. And when Carla finally saw who and what it was she would be expected to fight, even her tremendous confidence wavered. "Dios mio…"

" _LET'S GET READY TO RUMBLEEEEEEEEEE-"_

* * *

_On the Road Again_

_12: 25 AM_

"So just to be sure, we  _are_ actually heading to the Docks now, right?" Judy asked.

"Against my better judgement," Bogo said, looking pointedly at the rabbit's injuries, "yes, we are actually heading to the Docks now. As much as driving  _Clawhauser's_ car there makes me wish we brought barf bags."

Unsurprisingly, the fat feline was a bit of a slob, and wasn't accustomed to sharing his vehicle. Nick had to put his feet up on the back of the passenger's seat to avoid having them touch the floor. But with Nick and Judy's own patrol car still totaled after the incident on the Torrential Turnpike, and Ol' Bessie's heroic sacrifice, and most of the other officers still needing their vehicles for other duties, this is what they were stuck with now, fuzzy dice and all.

"It could be worse. Maybe some other psycho with a grudge will pull something before then," Nick said.

"Don't even joke about that. Seriously, don't. I'm counting it as a term violation."

"Fair enough. The only psycho I'm interested in taking down right now is Count Reynard." He said the name, or rather the alias, with a subdued, but noticeable fury. This latest evidence on just how deplorable his father had become was not sitting well with him. It was like every time he thought he couldn't possibly get any worse, he found new and exciting ways to prove him wrong. "Just how much of a hypocrite can he be? He goes on and on about how he's trying to 'save' me from cophood, all while outright  _kidnapping_ someone else's son?!"

"Consider yourself lucky you didn't have to spend as much time around Bellwether as I did," Judy replied. "Hypocrisy seems to be a thing among megalomaniacs."

Jimmy had no opinion on this subject, as he was currently curled up in a ball on the backseat and snoring softly, Wallace cradled under his arm. Unlike them, the young fox had no experience with all-nighters, doing paperwork or otherwise. They couldn't begrudge him for it. If he needed a quick rest to be more effective in the field, then more power to him for being able to sleep right now. Nick practically envied him.

"You two still have a lot to learn about how criminals think," Bogo said. "Yes, even you, Wilde. Despite your vast and questionable experience, it's a lot different dealing with it from this side of the line. You have to shift your entire perspective around and start thinking about how to put a stop to crimes rather than how to commit them. I imagine that's a bit uncomfortable for you."

"Boy, ain't that the truth?" Nick slumped back in his seat. "Do me a favor, Chief: next time you hire someone with a criminal past, make sure to tell them that  _up front._ Would've saved me a lot of trouble."

"I'll make a note of it." He sounded serious too. "Anyway, before we get interrupted again, please tell us everything you can about Piers Narwhalter and how we're supposed to save his ass."

"Do narwhals  _have_  asses?"

" _Wilde!"_

"Right. Well, I'm afraid I don't know very much, at least not by  _my_ standards, but Piers is Zootopia's chief information broker. You want to know anything, about anyone, anywhere, he's the guy you get in touch with. Of course, finding information on Piers  _himself_ is a different story. When you make a business out of digging up dirt, you get pretty good at covering your tracks with it."

"But you still know more than most," Judy pressed.

Nick smiled. "Naturally. According to rumor, the kind of rumor you only come across by sticking your nose where it doesn't belong, Piers has access to a vast network of underwater tunnels through which he literally ferries his underlings around. They serve as his eyes, ears, and when necessary, pointy head things. Given that most mammals can't last very long underwater, he and his marine forces have a bit of a monopoly over it. He almost never leaves it either, which is going to make getting to him a bit of a kerfuffle." Nick mentally crossed "Use the word 'kerfuffle' in a sentence" off of his bucket list. A list that was feeling more and more necessary to keep track of.

"Not very social, is he?" Judy could relate, having lived in a farming community that was 99% rabbit, and growing by the second, for most of her life.

"Let me put it this way: he has a devoted following based around the belief that predators are not only savages, but secretly plotting to cannibalize him and every other marine mammal just because we happen to eat seafood."

"Oh, sweet fish and chips."

"Exactly."

"So he's an extreme xenophobe with an impenetrable underwater empire, like Catlantis, all built under the Docks?" Bogo asked, in a tone that really  _wanted_ to believe him after everything they'd experienced, but was still having some trouble. "And we need to find a way into it anyway?"

"Unless you don't think my father can find a way. Then we can just go home and order pizza."

Bogo's hooved fingers clasped tightly around the wheel. "Alright, then let's test your ability to use your powers for good. You're an evil mastermind who really wants Piers Narwhalter dead. How do you get to him?"

As much as Nick would've liked to smoothly belt out an answer like reflex, he was honestly at a bit of a loss. Even all the extra time he'd had to think about it didn't help him figure out how  _anyone_ was supposed to get to Narwhalter, cop, criminal, or anything in between.

_Alright, Inner Dad, I'm calling you out. What's your plan this time?_

_Oh,_ now  _you want to talk to me again. I thought you banished me from your mindscape like a pro bono exorcism._

_Believe me, the less I have to talk to any facet of you, the better, but I need information._

_About how to get to Mr. Stabbyface? Yeah, I heard everything, but I'm not talking. Figure it out yourself,_ boy.

_Maybe I will…_

_H-Hey, what are you doing?!_

"Nick?" Judy asked curiously, peering into the back. The fox was staring unflinchingly at the back of her seat, sitting as still as a statue. But he had heard her, for he raised a finger for silence.

_How do ya like me now, Dad? I'll take that epiphany now._

_Owww, I may be a mental construct, but I have feelings too! Fine, take it and leave me alone. The real me's just gonna beat you again anyway._

"I got it!" Nick snapped back to reality, startling the bunny back into her seat.

"I really wonder what goes on in your head sometimes, Wilde," Bogo said. "Then I decide I'm better off not knowing."

"Probably a good idea," he admitted. "Okay, we need to track down one of Narwhalter's associates on the surface. From there, we can pry out some information on how us surface-dwellers can get to him."

Bogo was incredulous. "After all that, your brilliant idea is to ask someone  _else_ for an idea?"

"No, my brilliant idea is to interrogate a suspect for information. Isn't that what cops do?"

He sighed  _loudly._ "...You are technically correct."

"The best kind of correct."

"At least it's something. Now we have a plan," Judy reassured them both. Jimmy continued snoozing away. Outside the window, the "MOST INTERESTING DISTRICT" sign passed by them again.

She was starting to believe it now.

* * *

_Inside the Countmobile_

_11:44 PM_

"That sign is a filthy liar," Finnick grumbled, glaring at the fish-shaped advert as it fell behind them.

Count Reynard was as relaxed as ever, driving the limo with one paw and using the other to scratch RJ behind the ears. It was a pretty respectable attitude to have with a team of assassins sitting in the back. The most he did was threaten to shoot anyone who started singing "99 Bottles of Mooze".

Every now and then, Finnick chanced looking back there through the rearview mirror, just to make sure no one was doing anything he might find life-threatening. Drummond Rane was crossing his arms and thumping his foot, visibly going stir-crazy with all the pent-up energy he was longing to release. If it weren't for his honorbound agreement with Reynard, Finnick would've expected a few holes in the roof by now. Piper Piedmont was softly playing traveling music on her violin, occasionally adding sharper notes whenever they hit a bump or mailbox. Fast Tony had attempted to escape out the window more than once, and was now being massaged into submission by the vixens to keep him from doing so again. Finnick could sympathize, but was just glad it wasn't him. Seeing Pearl sneak a wink at him, he stopped watching and double-checked to make sure his seatbelt was tight enough.

"So I know you're probably not gonna tell me," he said, looking back over at Reynard, "but what's your plan for taking down Narwhalter? Heck, I don't even know where the guy lives."

"Oh, just at the center of an elaborate underwater maze that's basically inaccessible to land mammals." Not that this seemed to concern the fox in the slightest. "I'm thinking we're gonna find one of his guys on the surface and shake him down until we can figure out how to get there. Then we storm in and shank him in the ass with his own horn. If narwhals have those. It's technically a tooth, right?"

Finnick rolled his eyes and leaned against the window. "Fine, don't tell me. I figured as much."

"I  _did_ tell you."

The fennec stared back at him, shocked beyond belief. "Wait, you're serious?  _That's_ your entire plan?"

"What's wrong with that plan?" he asked, making his best show of being deeply offended. "I...I quite like that plan, good sir!"

"It's not like I've got anything better," he confessed. "That's just a lot more  _direct_ than I've come to expect from you. You're usually more akin to a living Rube Goldretriever machine."

"What can I say? Times change and so can I."

"Yeah, about that actually." Finnick couldn't let this opportunity slip by. "What the hell  _happened_ to you? You come back from the hotel and you're a complete mess of a mammal. You go back out again and now suddenly it's like none of that ever happened. Can't say I've ever seen anyone get over a crippling psychological breakdown that quickly."

This, in their entire conversation, was the only thing to give Reynard any length of pause. Even if that pause was still beyond what most mammals would notice and led to nothing of import. "You know the old saying, don't you? 'When life gives you lemons, you burn someone's house down'." Seeing Finnick's glare, he responded, "No? Then how about, 'You can't make an omelette without gunning down a family of chickens who didn't pay their protection money.' Come on, you must know  _that_ one!"

"Not as well as I thought apparently." Finnick wasn't sure if he was more pissed at Reynard for not taking this seriously, or at himself for ever thinking he would.

"You know what? No." Reynard clicked his tongue thoughtfully, fingers drumming on the wheel. "You're too smart for that. As I should expect from my son's old partner in crime. I hope you don't think I've been keeping you by my side just to have a straight mammal to my comedic wit. The fact of the matter is, I rather like you actually. Compared to everyone else I've employed, you're easily my favorite, like a vintage trading card that I'd frame on my shelf. That makes you quite special to me, Finnick."

He didn't say this with any kind of heartfelt emotion or visible expression of affection. It flowed out of the Count's mouth as easily as he would rattle off his grocery list. That made Finnick tempted to dismiss it as a steaming load of bullshit, but in this case, it was the words themselves that carried the meaning. Reynard was a very guarded criminal, much like Nick himself back in the day. This wasn't the kind of insight he would share lightly, even as a lie. It exposed weaknesses about himself, weaknesses that Finnick knew for a fact were real and could be exploited.

It almost made him feel like a bit of a jerk for actively exploiting them, but real feelings or not, he still preferred the younger Wilde over this one. "Uh...thanks. It's, uh, great to work with you too. Nick used to speak really highly of you."  _Before you went completely off your rocker, that is._

Reynard only nodded, and just like that, the moment was over. Finnick could tell his words had affected him though because he then freely provided exactly what he asked for. "Let's just say I had a stroke of inspiration while visiting my ex-wife. I see a bigger picture now, one that stretches beyond the crime lords and my assimilation of their gangs. Piers Narwhalter is no longer my primary concern, Finnick. He's merely a stepping stone, one that you need to be very careful about stepping on, but a stepping stone nonetheless. Once I gain access to his powerful network of information, I'll be able to pool all of my resources and put my  _real_ plan into action."

This too, he said with no real passion, but there was an intensity behind his voice that made Finnick almost shiver. "So...only one more crime lord to go until then?"

"Only one more. And thank badness for that." He sighed in relief, a move which broke the building tension. "This has been such a tedious process already, I'm glad I only had to perma-huss five crime lords instead of six like there used to be."

Finnick let that pass for a few seconds in silence, but no longer. "...Are you gonna explain that comment, or is that just something else you'll keep teasing everyone with and never elaborate on?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Reynard said, taking some time to peruse the HB file as they pulled into their stop.

* * *

_The Belfry -_ _First Challenge_

_Still Ambiguous_

" _-EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"_

Lucy gasped, taking a few deep breaths before daring to speak again. " _In the red corner...traitor to all of her friends, failure to her wife and family, insult to the art of Lucha Libre, wanted for the murder of Sandcat Sanchez, but completely failed to actually kill him and so didn't really get any sort of revenge, plus let me remind you that Count Foxypants took over Sandcat's syndicate and so_ nothing  _will actually change, CARLA HYENANDEEEEEEEZ!"_

Carla barely heard the long string of insultductions anyway. She was too busy wondering how she would avoid adding, "died in vain and was never seen again" to the list. She had fought matches with the odds stacked against her before, but this was on a whole different level.

" _Annnnd in the blue corner...these two guys who you probably forgot existed!"_

Fangs and Boomer had seen better days. The two Outbackers were caged and snarling, their slitted eyes denoting a savage state. Even worse, they seemed to have been forcefully stuffed into sparkly masks and speedos, the latter including their names printed on the butts. No one should be forced to wear those, even if they weren't naturalists.

As soon as they sighted her, the savages lunged and hit the side of the cage, Fangs' jaws snapping through the bars and Boomer's stubby arms swinging at her.

"What happened to them?" Carla asked, not sure if she should fear the duo or feel sorry for them.

" _Remember that chase along the turnpike? You know, the one where you crashed your own car? After that, the Count decided that these two were more useful to him as savages than sapients and left them for me to look after,"_ Lucy explained. " _But don't worry, I've taken_ super  _good care of them! I gave them baths…"_

The monitor she was on briefly switched to footage of Fangs and Boomer strapped into harnesses and repeatedly dunked into a tank of water.

" _I kept them well-groomed…"_

Fangs and Boomer were dragged by collars around their necks through a pair of giant brushes.

" _And I gave them plenty of exercise!"_

Fangs and Boomer ran along a hamster wheel in pursuit of a fake rabbit wearing a police uniform. Then Boomer tripped and fell onto Fangs, causing both of them to spin around the wheel a few times.

" _So as you can see, I am very well-equipped to being a responsible pet owner,"_ Lucy said proudly.

Carla took a second glance at their snarling jaws and the way they were drooling at her. "What about feeding them?"

Lucy blinked a few times, then slapped her forehead. " _D'oh! Silly me, I_ knew  _I forgot something! Well, I guess it worked out in the end. You get a challenge and they get a meal!"_

 _And if they spill my blood all over the floor, no doubt you'll get a meal as well._ This was the kind of comment she would normally not be shy about saying out loud, but the prospect of being incapacitated in front of a pair of savages was not one she wanted to chance for a cheap jab.

But even with all of her faculties intact, Carla wasn't exactly oozing confidence. She was still tired from the beating she'd gotten already, and these could hardly be considered the same mammals she had soundly thrashed back at the Rain Barrel. No, these were the same mammals who had put Wil-Nick, in the hospital for a week.

" _Is our challenger ready? Then let's ring the bell and start this-!"_ Lucy doubled over coughing, clutching her throat. " _Ack. Can't do the voice anymore. Just...just start."_ The sound of a bell echoed through the room.

The cage door swung open and out came Fangs and Boomer, charging straight for their seemingly helpless prey. Carla's life flashed before her eyes, and it helped her to remember something.

She was not Nick.

She was La Mala Perra.

Fangs was the first to reach her and the dingo lunged for her throat, jaws wide to give her a hickey that would make Lucy proud. Before he even made the leap, Carla was countering it, bending low and sending an uppercut into the bottom of his chin that forcefully slammed the canine's mouth shut and audibly cracked his jaw. "Sorry to upper-cut in!" He fell to the floor next to her as Carla charged forward, grabbing him by the tail and swinging him like a bludgeon into the approaching Boomer. "But I'm feeling hungry for a cage-in special!" Both savages were thrown backwards, right towards the open cage they came from.

The cage was quickly pulled back into the floor before they reached it. " _You probably think that was bad luck, but imagine how pissed I'd be if this was_ that  _anticlimactic."_ With no cage in their way, the savages hit the ropes on the other end of the ring and flopped to the floor, angered, but otherwise unharmed.

Before they could attack again, Carla struck first, flinging herself off of the ropes to barrel across the ring and into Fangs. Gritting her teeth to ignore the scratches and bites he gave her in protest, Carla tossed him over the other side onto the hard floor below. "Looks like I just scored a...dingout?' The booing clip played again.

She jumped away just as Boomer struck out with his powerful legs, getting clawed across the stomach in the process. Knowing he could've easily disemboweled her with that same move, she considered herself lucky. Not giving him another chance, she leapt over his head as he lunged for her, grabbing him from behind and suplexing him hard into the ground. "I knew I'd wipe the floor with...uh...roo." More booing.

La Mala Perra was bombing, and even worse, the savages were both back up again. Fangs's fangs were visibly bent and Boomer was bleeding from a head wound, but if they were even remotely slowed down by these injuries, they didn't show it.

"Ahahaha...ha…" La Mala Perra's signature laugh died in her throat as the full weight of her situation bore down on her. She was fighting for her life against two opponents who didn't feel pain and would never tire, all to escape a sadistic game and get back to friends and family who most likely never wanted to speak to her again. There was nothing funny about any of this no matter how hard she tried to force it, no punchline that could fit these circumstances other than perhaps "The Aristocats!"

La Mala Perra had gone back into retirement, leaving Carla Hyenandez to either pick up the slack or become a snack. The stinging of her wounds and her blood dripping onto the ring did nothing to boost her confidence.

" _Do you see now, Carla? What your challenge_  really  _entails?"_ Lucy asked. " _How do you KO opponents who won't stay down? I'm curious to see what answer you come up with."_

"Whose side are you on?!" the hyena growled.

" _Whichever one provides the most entertainment. Between you and the mindless junkies who partied too hard...it's a tough call."_

The savages were so uncivilized that they didn't even have the courtesy to wait for them to finish talking, and Fangs charged for Carla again before she could retort. She narrowly sidestepped his lunge and brought her elbow down on the back of his neck, knocking him to the floor. She pinned him before he could get up again, but knowing there would be no three count, she wrapped her arm around his throat and pulled him into a chokehold. Even if he wouldn't go down from pain or fatigue, she could still choke him unconscious.

" _Ooooh, there's an idea! Not sure if it's one you've thought all the way through though."_

As Fangs thrashed and writhed in her grip, Carla realized that she had overlooked Boomer. The kangaroo was now climbing onto one of the turnbuckles, not out of any sense of tactical advantage, just an instinctual urge to get to higher ground. From there, he looked down at the hyena and her hostage and roared. He was going to pounce, and there was little she could do to avoid it. The dingo's struggles were beginning to weaken as he lost oxygen, but she wouldn't have enough time to choke him out completely.

In her moment of desperation, another idea came to mind, one that repulsed and disgusted her, but was too coldly logical to ignore. She didn't have enough time to choke out Fangs...but she  _did_ have enough time to break his neck, eliminating a threat and putting her one step closer to freedom. She could hear the bat's voice echoing in her head. " _I'm curious to see what answer you come up with."_

She placed a paw on the side of Fangs's head, as if she might actually do it, but she wasn't fooling herself for a second, and the next thing she felt were Boomer's two giant feet coming down on her backside.

" _Ha! I_ knew  _you couldn't do it!"_ Lucy yelled victoriously. " _Finally, I can rest easy."_

Even as she continued to get raked by their sharp claws and teeth, Carla stood her ground and traded blows with the savage duo. "What are you talking about now?!"

" _See, it was really bugging me how that whole thing with Sanchez ended, all ambiguous about whether or not you were gonna go through with it. I didn't think you would, but I didn't know for sure, and I was really kicking myself for getting impatient and doing it for you. But then I thought, 'Hey, if she can't kill someone even when her literal life depends on it, then no way would she have done it out of petty revenge.' And you couldn't do it, so that means I was right! Yay!"_

"...Are you serious?" As Fangs and Boomer attacked again, Carla grabbed each of them by the arm, and with a spin, threw them both into opposing corners. "You forced me into a death match just to  _satisfy your ego?!"_

" _Of course not. I also wanted to see if you were capable of solving a problem without hitting it really hard. In that area too, you are meeting all of my expectations."_

It was a point that Carla found, in her current condition, increasingly difficult to argue. She racked her brain for any solution she had ever come up with that didn't involve brute force and liberal application of it.  _Jimmy getting kidnapped? Nailed a hippo in the cajones. Nick trapped in a burning building? Drove his car through the wall. Jimmy and Priscilla under attack? Tried to beat up every single mammal in the arena and got myself captured instead._ And now here she was trying to fight savagery with savagery.

_Alright, Nick. Let's take a page out of your book for once._

Carla looked back and forth between Fangs and Boomer, both back on their feet and about to charge again. Then, despite her numerous injuries and her heavy, labored breathing, she held out both paws and gave them a mutual "bring it" gesture. Taking the bait, Fangs howled with fury, Boomer's large tail thumped angrily against the ground, and they both rushed her.

At the last second, Carla jumped backwards, causing Fangs to bite Boomer in the shoulder and Boomer to slash Fangs in the chest. As they broke apart again, they started snarling and snapping not at Carla, but each other. It was the closest thing she had ever seen to any kind of communication between the two savages, and she could only imagine what this strange "language" would translate to.

 _Snarl, snarl, yip, growl_ ("What the hell was that for, ya bloody tosser?!")

 _Stomp, growl, thump, stomp_ ("Next time keep yer dirty mouth offa' me, mate!")

 _Yip, snarl, growl, howl_ ("Bugger off! You hit me first!")

 _Stomp, stomp, stomp, hop_ ("I did not, ya blind drongo!")

 _Roar_ ("Get stuffed!")

 _Roar_ ("Get double-stuffed!")

Carla watched as the savage Outbackers started tearing into each other, ignoring her completely. " _Nicely done,"_ Lucy praised, smiling down at the grisly scene. " _Want me to get you some popcorn for this?"_

She could've left it there and waited a minute or two for her challenge to complete itself, but letting two stupid naturalists kill each other was hardly any better than killing them herself. Carla grabbed onto the nearby ropes and jumped outside of the ring, tearing the ropes down with her, then started ripping apart the apron that covered the bottom.

Fangs and Boomer didn't stop fighting until a dark shadow was cast over them. They looked up, slitted eyes widening as the apron was dropped over them, then pulled up to sweep them into it. Using the ring ropes, Carla tied the ends together, trapping them inside of the makeshift sack. They struggled wildly in protest, tearing a few small holes here and there, but they currently lacked the higher intelligence to take advantage of it. "And  _that's_ what I call a non-violent solution," Carla finished, brushing the dust from her paws. "Good enough for you?"

Lucy frowned. It was clear she would've much preferred the bloodbath. " _Eh, 6/10. They're still not dead or unconscious."_

In response, Carla climbed out of the ring again, then climbed back in carrying a large, ringside bell. She approached the squirming sack and held the bell above her head.

"Din-goes the bell."

_DING!_

"Boom goes the dynamite."

_DING!_

Fangs and Boomer offered no further resistance. "Do I pass now?"

Lucy accepted the added bodily harm as recompense and smiled. " _I guess so. Congratulations, Carla, you've completed your first challenge!"_

"Perfecto," she said dryly. "Now how about you answer my question?"

She half-expected the bat to feign ignorance, but she surprised her again by immediately complying. " _Sure, sure, you've earned it. Might wanna take a seat first though. It's a lot to tell."_

Without much in the way of options, Carla sat herself on top of the unconscious lump she'd left in the middle of the ring, wondering just how long it took to explain where they were. As she did, she took greater notice of the cuts and bruises she had sustained, as they were really starting to sting with nothing else to distract her from them. And this was only the first of an unknown number of challenges that awaited her. Could she possibly outlast them all when she had so narrowly survived this one?

She was so distracted by these thoughts that she almost forgot to listen when Lucy started speaking again, and she doubted she would repeat herself. " _Let me get the short answer out of the way: we're in the Nocturnal District."_

That was all she needed to say to get Carla's mind whirling again. She had heard of the mysterious Nocturnal District before, but only through rumors, and none of them good. As the name suggested, it was a district created primarily to serve the needs of nocturnal mammals, which the rest of the city could only do in limited capacity. It was difficult to support a true nocturnal lifestyle in the hustle and bustle of a sprawling urban environment. As such, the Nocturnal District was not directly part of Zootopia, but directly beneath it, a massive underground city built into the very foundations of Zootopia itself.

Naturally, this also led it to being the single most crime-ridden cesspool in the entire metropolis, even worse than Happytown. Away from the prying eyes of the surface world, the nocturnal mammals practically had the run of the land down here. They had their own police force; it was even among the numbered ones, Precinct 7, but they weren't just helpless to stop criminal activity, they were plainly terrified of doing anything more than preventing the occasional purse from being pinched, and that depended on who was doing the pinching.

" _Did you know there used to be_ six  _ruling crime lords in Zootopia?"_ Lucy continued, segueing from her very thoughts. " _Sandcat Sanchez, the crime lord of Sahara Square, Mr. Big, the crime lord of Tundratown, Lady Lang, the crime lord of the Rainforest District, Damien Thornbrush, the crime lord of Outback Island, Piers Narwhalter, the crime lord of the Docks..."_ Lucy paused meaningfully. " _And Vladzotz Fangpyre, the crime lord of the Nocturnal District."_

Carla tried to remember if she had ever heard that name before, but even Sanchez had never mentioned him. Of course, ruling over the harsh, sun-baked district of Sahara Square, she doubted he and the Nocturnal crime lord saw eye-to-eye. "Can't say I've heard of him," Carla finally replied. "What was he like?"

" _No idea. Never met him."_ Upon seeing the look on Carla's face, " _What? I'm already telling you more than you asked for. I may not have met Vladzotz, but as you can probably tell by the name, he was of the flying, bloodsucking persuasion like myself, a vampire bat of impressive renown and an even more impressive castle from which he ruled over this underground kingdom. I do wish our paths had crossed at least once. It would've been an...interesting encounter, I'm sure."_ Lucy stared off into space, a noticeable blush coloring her cheeks. Carla didn't bother asking what kind of "encounter" she had in mind.

"So why  _are_ you telling me this? You just admitted you have no real reason to."

" _I just wanted to give you a fair reward for your hard work, Carla."_ Lucy brushed straight past the obviously-bullshit answer and continued on. " _But it was not meant to be. That fancy castle of his went up in flames one night, and Vlad and his entire family line were never heard from again. I don't know who was responsible. The civilians? The police? A bitter gang member? Some buff guy with a whip? In any case, Vlad's empire collapsed overnight and organized crime in the Nocturnal District came to an abrupt end."_

"And the mammals there lived happily ever after?" Carla asked, appreciating the info, but still trying to figure out the point.

" _Nope, quite the opposite. You wanna know what's worse than organized crime, Carla?_ Dis _organized. With Vladzotz gone and no heirs on the throne, his former empire went, pun-intended, batshit insane. The gang wars that waged as someone attempted to fill the power vacuum were immense, enough to nearly tear the entire district asunder. In the end, a new crime lord was never crowned, and anyone who tried didn't last more than a week or two. It's not so much a crime haven now as it is a crime clusterfuck. Anything goes! And that's where I came in."_

" _There_ it is. There's the point. More ego-stroking."

" _Oh, I haven't gotten to my point just yet. So how about you shut up and let me?"_ she asked sweetly, holding up her remote.

Carla shut up.

" _You could call me an opportunist, or perhaps an entrepreneur, but I always thought of myself as an entertainer first and foremost. So I swooped in and took advantage of all the mess to create my own little hideaway where I can have all the entertainment I want! At the expense of others, naturally. That's just how things are down here."_

Lucy laughed. " _And_ that,  _my new guest, is the point. There_ is  _no point! I have no obligations, no responsibilities, no shackles to hold me down! I can do whatever I want, whenever I want, to whomever I want! Reynard's goal may be to create order among the syndicates, but I've always found the thrill of chaos soooooo much more exciting!"_ She sure looked "excited" alright by the way she was wrapping her wings around herself and giggling like a schoolgirl.

She snapped out of it quickly. " _So yeah, that about covers that question. Where we are is the pinnacle of my life's philosophy given form. Anything else you want to ask?"_

Stunned, Carla just rose her paw slowly.

" _Too bad! That's all you get for one challenge! I do_   _have another prize for you though."_

Carla heard a whirring behind her and turned to find that there was suddenly a small table with a glass of water awaiting her. She looked at it skeptically. " _Come on, you think I would put you through all of that just to poison you? You can't tell me you're not up for a refreshing glass of H20 right about now."_

She was. In fact, Carla needed water so badly that she could barely keep herself from lunging at it right now. "So...there's really nothing but water in there?"

" _Now I didn't say_ that." Carla, who had just jumped down and was about to grab it, stopped. " _It's filled with a healthy dose of tranquilizer, just enough to konk you out and get you set up for your next challenge."_

"And you expect me to drink that because…?"

She braced herself, expecting a familiar tingling in her Hoot Boots any second, but it never came. Just as she had proven herself capable of not relying on brute force, Lucy too had other methods at her disposal than coercion. " _Because if you don't, you're going to be stuck in this room forever and you'll never see your loved ones again. Personally, I never took you as that much of a coward, but you've already proven me wrong once today…"_

Carla glared at both the monitor and the glass, but neither were intimidated, so she finally picked it up. "Alright, but let me just say this: I don't care how many of your sick challenges you throw at me, Lucy Sang. By my honor as both La Mala Perra  _and_  Carla Hyenandez, and as a proud daughter of the Rodentriguez family, I swear on my life that I will not stop fighting until I! Am! Vic-"

" _Bored now."_ Lucy pressed the button.

Carla slapped both paws over her mouth to stop the onslaught of giggles, but seeing that it was futile, hurriedly chugged the drugged water in one gulp. She remembered too late that tranquilizers were not meant to be taken like shots and abruptly passed out, hitting her head on the table on the way down.

" _Ouch!"_ Lucy winced. " _She's sure out alright. Hey, Grunt, let's get our amiga here dressed and ready for the next one!"_

* * *

_Under the Sea_

_12: 03 AM_

In the dark depths beneath the waves, within a guarded sanctum, a series of clicks and whistles rippled through the water.

"A report?" a voice answered. "Yes, Mr. Narwhalter, I do have news. But it isn't good…"

More clicks, followed by a long, droning buzz.

"You are correct, sir. The fox, Count Reynard as he calls himself, is coming for you now. He has already disposed of the others and I must admit he seems formidable. We may be protected for the time being, but I doubt he will stop until he has killed you too."

There was a long pause, followed by a simple, two-click reply.

"Wha...what do you mean ' _let him?!'"_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We weren't kidding when we said there would be RJ references. The vixens Pearl, Opal, and Crystal first appeared in that story in a similar capacity. Just to recap, they are based on the three arctic foxes that appear in the concept art and this particular version of them belongs to me. They are named after white gemstones and each have an annoying way of speaking that comes from typical valley girl stereotypes. The RJ Wallabeanie is obviously based on RJ himself. You may or may not find his quotes familiar.
> 
> Drummond Rane is a very unsubtle parody and belongs to Mind Jack, as does Piper Piedmont. I will take credit for their team name though because I'm more proud of it than I should be.
> 
> The Belfry plot is another one we've been looking forward to for a while. I know at least one of you wanted to see Fangs and Boomer again, so hopefully that brightened up these otherwise tense circumstances. They may not be the only familiar faces we see down here either. The Hoot Boots were a bit of a last-minute addition, as it was otherwise hard to justify Carla going along with any of this.
> 
> Fans of "When Instinct Falls" should be well familiar with the Nocturnal District and its crime lord: Vladzotz Fangpyre. After Upplet has made such fantastic use of Lucy Sang in his story, in which her relationship with Vlad is a lot less distant to say the least, it only felt right for us to return the favor, even if it's not exactly a major role. He may even make a physical appearance in Drabbles at some point. While it's not obvious yet, we're also using Upplet's version of the Nocturnal District. And do look into WiF if you haven't already. It's a biggie and a goodie. ;)
> 
> Speaking of Lucy, Mind Jack has now started a side story about her origins known as "Bloodlines." The first chapter is on his profile if you want to know more about everyone's favorite psycho bat.
> 
> That should be all for this unexpectedly large first chapter of the Narwhalter arc. Happy 200K, everyone!


	28. Stink or Swim

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Narwhalter arc continues, just to remind you that we're still, in fact, actually at this arc. Worlds collide and familiar faces return, but otherwise, not much to say actually. Been a while since that's happened.

****

**Chapter 28: Stink or Swim**

_Zootopia Police Department - Precinct 1_

_Interrogation Room_

_12: 14 AM_

"So how are you feeling?"

Simon assumed his significant other was being sarcastic until he caught a flash of genuine concern on her muzzle. They were sitting here alone now, aside from the wolf, bear, and tiger outside still watching their every move, and Karen seemed to be using that time to be a little less abrasive than usual. "That's a complicated question," he said, leaning back as far as his restraints would allow. "Mostly, I'm pissed, still pretty vengeful, a little embarrassed, a bit on-edge, but...also relieved."

"Relieved to finally know the truth?"

"Relieved to know that I've been worrying my striped tail off over just  _Reynard."_  He let out a breath he'd been holding for a long, long time. "I was expecting worse."

"I know," she said, her eyes subconsciously trailing down and to the right. "We just need to have faith that your old employer will keep Kyle alive long enough for us to get to him."

He snorted. "There's no faith involved. If he were dead, we would already know. Reynard likes to make a show out of everything."

"Which brings us to the question of what to do about  _you,"_ Karen said, clasping her paws on the table in front of her. "You know I can't just bust you out of here, right?"

"Why not? If I could take this whole building, you should have no problem with those three outside." He looked genuinely confused.

She facepalmed. "Still have a soldier's mindset, I see. Unfortunately,  _one of us_ needs to hold an actual, stable job, and work opportunities are rather lacking for criminal fugitives. And then there's the mortgage on the house, our investment accounts, Kyle's retirement fund…"

"But you can't just leave me here either," he pressed, a hint of fear in his eyes. "You can't leave me alone with them."

"Shut up." Without warning, Karen reached across the table and pulled him into a kiss. It was as blunt and straight to the point as she was, but deeply affectionate in a way that only its recipient could discern. "Relax, honey," she said softly. "I'm not going to abandon you. I promise."

He smiled, his tail twitching. "Then what do you have in mind?"

There was a knock on the door behind them and in came the white wolf whose name Simon didn't even bother trying to learn anymore. "Not to kill the mood, but your lawyers are here."

"Lawyers?" Simon asked. " _That's_  your big plan, Karen?"

"Just follow my lead. At least we know we can trust them."

He narrowed his eyes in realization. "Please don't tell me you hired-"

" _ **Objection!"**_

The wolf jumped as a burly badger maneuvered his way past him. He was dressed in a professional blue suit and pants with a white undershirt and red tie. Simon could just see the glint of a Zootopian defense attorney's badge on his lapel. "It looks like we got here just in time, Mr. VanDal," he said, speaking with a distinct Badgertain accent.

"What were you even objecting to?"

"You being trussed up like a holiday dinner, of course!" answered an opossum coming in behind him and shoving the recovering wolf out of the way. She wore a black trenchcoat, belted at the waist with a gold buckle, a red blouse, and blue jeans. She slapped a pair of red, fingerless gloves together eagerly. "Don't worry, Simey, we'll get you out of here lickety-split!"

"I can't wait," he said dryly.

"Eric Badge, Delilah O' Possum," Karen greeted. "It's been a while. How's your new business been treating you?"

Eric rubbed the back of his neck with his long claws. "Somewhat…lightly…"

"This had better not be your first case," Simon groaned.

"Don't be silly!" said Delilah. "We've had plenty of experience settling civil lawsuits, sometimes even winning them!"

"This is a murder case," he reminded them, gritting his teeth. "Among other things…"

"We understand," Eric assured. "No matter what kind of trouble you're in, Mr. VanDal, we promise to prove your innocence in the name of justice."

"Justice!" Delilah cheered.

"Okay, but...you  _do_ know I'm actually guilty of all of it, right?"

Eric froze. "...I'm sorry?"

"He's guilty as shit, yeah," Karen admitted. "I was just hoping for a good plea deal."

Eric reeled back in exaggerated fashion. Delilah fainted and played dead on the floor.

If his restraints allowed him, Simon would headdesk.

* * *

_The Docks_

_Shantytown_

_12: 32 AM_

Nick took a deep breath through his nostrils. "Ahh...smell that crisp, nautical air. That's the smell of the sea!"

"This isn't the sea," Bogo said. "It's a glorified lake loaded with salt and artificial wave generators to make it  _resemble_ the sea."

"And your role as New Carla is cemented. Let's get to work."

The Docks was a unique district, but not what most would consider visually-appealing in the way that most of the city was. It was basically the complete opposite of Outback Island in that regard, and tourists were unlikely to find anything other than an abundance of species that didn't tend to reside anywhere else. Seals and walruses packed and stacked crates, moving them across the waters on tugboats, while dolphins and whales swam below the surface, maintaining the infrastructure or just playfully splashing passersby.

The cops headed across the wooden walkways, just trying not to get a splinter. "I know it doesn't  _look_ impressive," Nick said, "but rest assured that the real action lay literally beneath the surface. Now we just need to figure out how to get there."

Judy nodded. "Do you at least have a lead on who we should be going after?"

"I do. Though he's a bit of an elusive figure and I'm not entirely sure he actually exists. I mainly just know about him through various urban legends."

"Oh, that sounds  _very_ promising," Bogo said, throwing his hooves up. "We don't have the time to go searching every one of these dilapidated buildings. Especially if you're going to have me keep carrying your rookie." He gestured to the unconscious arctic fox still snoozing peacefully over his shoulder.

"I guess we probably should wake him up now," Nick conceded, as fun as it was watching the district chief of police become a pack mule. He started to look around for the nearest bucket of water.

Judy quickly averted disaster by jumping up and giving Jimmy a light bop on the noggin instead. "Aroo?" The young vulpine yawned right in Bogo's face as he woke up. "What did I miss?" he asked drowsily.

" _We're looking for someone to take us to Narwhalter and his secret underwater empire,"_ Wallace answered.

"Oh, okay…"

"Wait, how did you know-?" Nick again had to stop himself from questioning it. "Anyway, the plushie is right. Our fellow could be anywhere in this district, but I have a pretty good idea where to start looking. We just need to blend in a little more…" He looked towards a nearby pier, where an assortment of market booths had been set up.

Bogo looked at him suspiciously. "What are you plotting, Wilde?"

* * *

_The Bailing Bucket_

_12: 36 AM_

"Not what I was expecting, but this is somehow even worse."

The Bailing Bucket was an interesting sort of bar, which in this city seemed to outnumber the mundane kind. The place was situated on one of the lower rungs of the Docks, so close to sea level that the tides freely moved in and out, flooding the place. This was not a bug, but a feature. Due to its usual clientele, they actually got more business running a place that was always partially underwater, and the tides never rose higher than the tables, ensuring that the drinks at least would stay dry. The last thing anyone wanted at a bar was a literally watered down beverage.

Unfortunately for the erstwhile officers, it was high tide.

After wading their way to a table, or in Judy's case,  _swimming,_  they somewhat uncomfortably sat themselves down. Species-wise, they stuck out a bit, but it was mostly hidden under what Nick had referred to as "elaborate disguises." The fox wore an old-fashioned white sailor's outfit, complete with the little hat, Judy had a female version in a spiffy light blue with a skirt, Chief Bogo was wrapped up in a large rain coat and hat, and Jimmy had gone all-out with a full pirate costume, including a fake eyepatch, hook paw, and Wallace in a parrot costume on his shoulder. "Shiver me timbers, where be this landlubber we're lookin' for?"

"Why did you let him get the pirate costume?" Bogo sighed. "You  _know_ we're gonna be hearing this the entire trip, right?"

"I don't know what yer talkin' about, Captain."

"Captain, huh? I kinda like the sound of that..." He smiled wistfully.

"Glad you do," Nick said, "because as it turns out, it  _is_ a captain we're looking for. Captain Smokey, to be precise. He's a bit of a local troublemaker with a reputation for mischief and trickery. Just my kind of mammal. And word on the street is, he's in pretty good with our buddy Narwhalter."

"And this is one of his hangouts?" Judy asked.

He shrugged. "No idea, but everyone knows that the best place to meet new mammals is at the local watering hole. If he's here, he'll probably be an old guy sitting by himself and looking all mysterious. May have an eyepatch, beard, and/or a salty demeanor."

Judy sat up in her water-logged seat and looked around the room. "Nick, there's like  _five_ of those here."

"That could be a problem…" he admitted. "I don't even know his species."

"Don't worry, I'll handle this," Jimmy said, suddenly standing up. Before anyone could stop him, he raised a fake sword, turned to the rest of the bar, and yelled, "Ahoy thar! I be Captain Frost of the Arctic Sea! Have any of ye scallywags seen Captain Smokey?! He owes me a whole lot o' doubloons!"

" _Pay up or walk the plank! Walk the plank! Squawk!"_

Instantly, several flippers pointed towards a table in the back. "Oi! Thanks a lot, you bunch of sellouts!"

The mammal grumpily swigging down his drink was not very big for a sea captain, and not very fat for a seal. He was dark grey in color and wore a grey overcoat on top of it, plus a white captain's hat. He somehow had a grizzly beard, which might have been fake, with a tobacco pipe poking out through it. Smokey needed a good drag of the pipe before he spoke to the strange mammals now splashing over to him. "Alright, I've never heard of any of you lot, so who are you and whaddaya want?"

Nick cleared his throat. Everyone else was pretty content to let him do the talking, considering they had no idea who this guy was, and in Bogo's case, wanted to see how badly he would screw it up. "Well, Captain Smokey, sir, big fan of your work, by the way, we just wanted to know-"

"You're cops."

"Nice disguises, Wilde," Bogo said flatly.

"It's not that," Smokey said, waving his flipper. "They're actually pretty good. Especially the pirate there." Jimmy grinned and high-foured Wallace. "But word travels far in this part of the city. I doubt there's anyone in Narwhalter's crew who doesn't know who you are and why you're here by now."

"I guess that saves us some trouble..." Nick said, a little unsettled even though he himself had told the others about Narwhalter's vast information network. "So you'll help us?"

"Now when did I say anything about that?" He took another swig from his drink, and barely bothered to swallow it before speaking again. "Narwhalter doesn't let any landwalkers into his sanctum, especially not preds. Nobody wants to be 'that guy' who broke the number one rule. Be grateful you're not sleeping with the fishes you snack on."

"So there  _is_ a way we could get inside."

Smokey faceflippered. "This is why I hate foxes."

"Hey!" Judy yelled.

"My dad's trying to kill his boss, Carrots. It's sorta justified."

"Let's get something straight here." Smokey hopped around on his flabby body to face them. "Narwhalter isn't my boss. He's a friend of mine who I do odd jobs for every now and then, but Captain Sam Smokey is a Lion of the Sea and he doesn't throw down his anchor with any mammal! Got it?!" He slammed his glass for emphasis.

"Uh...got it, Mr. Lion."

"I'd just like to point out that we're fully in our right to arrest you now," Bogo said, finally losing patience with this.

"Oh, really?" the seal asked smugly. "And then what? You'll bring me back to your station and grill me for a few days while I give you diddly-squat? All the while giving good ol' Count Reynard plenty of time to figure it out for himself? Yeah, I don't think you'll be arresting me, bozo."

"It's  _Bogo_ ," he growled.

"In fact, I think I've suffered just about enough of you idiots. Hold my beer." He promptly threw the contents of his glass into Bogo's face.

"Agh!" The chief clutched at his face and rubbed furiously. Some of it had gotten in his eyes. "Grab him!" he ordered.

But before they could even react, Smokey inhaled deeply and blew a large cloud of smoke at the rest of them, making the officers start coughing uncontrollably. Being the lowest to the "ground", Judy was the first to recover, opening her eyes just in time to see Smokey disappear below the table. "He's getting away!"

"On it-GAH!" Nick turned to pursue, but abruptly fell over and splashed into the drink.

"How did you trip in  _water?"_ Judy shook her head in disbelief and swam after the seal, who she could just spot as a moving dark blob.

Nick sputtered as he grabbed onto the table to pull himself back up, reaching down with his other paw to pull up something else. "That jerk just  _pantsed_ me!"

Judy looked back, sure he must have said something else, when that dark blob crept back up on her. "Eek! My skirt!" Several bar patrons instantly grew more interested.

"Don't fret, me hearties, I'm on me way!" Jimmy didn't get very far before Chief Bogo snatched him up.

"We don't have time for this!" Throwing Jimmy back over his shoulder, Bogo ran after the retreating seal, grabbing Nick and Judy as well before rushing out of the bar. Let no one say that Chief Bogo didn't know how to get things done when he was literally carrying his team.

Stepping outside, he looked frantically through the surrounding waters for the runaway seal, but only found him when he leapt up in front of the bovine and smacked him across the face with his tail a few times. "Pretty sorry performance for a water buffalo!" he taunted, plopping back into the drink.

"I'm a  _cape_ buffalo!" As his target swam away, Bogo made a desperate and somewhat reckless move. So it was only fitting that he used Judy for the task, picking the surprised rabbit up and throwing her as hard as he could at Smokey's back. She hit the seal with a tremendous splash before both of them disappeared under the waves. "What?" he asked, seeing the two concerned foxes on his shoulders. "Don't tell me she wouldn't have done the same thing herself if she had time."

Sure enough, Smokey burst out of the water seconds later with Judy attached to his backside. The bunny was panicked only for a second before she put both feet together and kicked the seal away, sending him flying into a shipping crate. "Yes!" Judy pumped her fist in adorable fashion as she fell back into the water.

Nick and Jimmy dismounted from Bogo, partially because they didn't want to be thrown next, and followed him up a ladder onto the main dock. Seeing them coming, Smokey pulled himself from the wreckage and bounced pitifully away, being much slower on land. But before they could so much as say "Freeze!", Bogo suddenly tripped backwards, slipping on a banana peel that had suspiciously ended up under his hoof. Nick and Jimmy swerved to avoid him and continued the chase, cutting Smokey off at the edge of the pier before he could escape into the water again.

"Alright, alright, ya got me!" the salty captain said, extending a flipper begrudgingly. "Good game, fellas. Put 'er there."

Jimmy smiled and reached for the flipper when Nick grabbed his arm. "Nah ah, too easy."

Smokey sighed and turned his flipper over, revealing the joy buzzer attached to it. "Can't blame an old pinniped for trying."

"We can, actually," Bogo said, picking him up from behind by the scruff of his coat. "There's even a name for it: 'obstruction of justice'. So how about you start telling us about this friend of yours?"

* * *

_The Nocturnal District_

_The Belfry - Second Challenge_

_Some Later Time_

Carla was even more sore when she woke up this time, both in body and in temperament. Her recently-accrued claw and bite marks still stung a little, dulled only by the sizable lump on her noggin and the tranquilizer she had been forced to ingest. As her brain slowly recovered, it started to piece together where she was and how she had gotten all of these wonderful injuries. Needless to say, she was pissed, which was kind of like saying that she was breathing, but under the circumstances, it was hard not to be.

Unlike the fake wrestling ring, the room she was in now was completely alien to her. It was square and metallic, with piping visibly running through the walls and connecting to a room somewhere beyond a large, rectangular mirror. She would've been more curious about the pipes, except that her own reflection was far more distracting. So  _that_ was why she felt a bit chilly. "She put me in a  _bikini?!"_

To Carla's immense horror, her badass wrestling uniform had been replaced by a thin, two-piece swimsuit. It was frankly a small miracle that it at least came in black and bore her familiar skull design. But it wasn't like it was the  _only_ thing she was wearing; she still had the Hoot Boots too. Carla frowned in displeasure and poked the bikini top a bit. "Could she possibly stoop any lower?"

" _An excellent question, but I suggest you save_ those  _until after you've completed your second challenge!"_ A familiar monitor lowered from the ceiling above her, showing Lucy lounging on a beach chair, sporting giant sunglasses, wearing a lei, and sipping some tropical drink, probably made from some tropical mammal. " _Eesh, you really_ do  _look terrible. This is like the total opposite of the fanservice I was going for."_

Carla was confused. "What does servicing fans have to do with any of this? Are they giant death fans that I have to jump through?"

" _Nevermind. Your second challenge is actually a dip in my personal swimming pool. All you gotta do is swim from one end of the pool to the other. If you succeed, I'll answer another question for you. And as a bonus, it'll help to wash off all that yucky dried blood."_

"I'm surprised you don't want to save it for yourself," she quipped.

" _Right, like I_  totally  _didn't feed on you at all while I was having you undressed."_

"Ugh!" Carla shuddered, assaulted by more than one disturbing mental image.

" _For the record, Brain Bleach is_ not  _one of our prizes today. But as a consolation, you get to meet another old friend. Take a look!"_ The mirror in front of Carla whirred and flipped over, revealing itself to actually be one-way glass. Now she could see into the next room, and with another push of a button, hear into it as well.

It was, as Lucy said, a truly massive pit of water, at least the size of an Olympic pool. It was also a wave pool, as she could see it constantly shifting and undulating. Swimming across this wouldn't be easy, but perfectly doable, so Carla didn't buy for a second that this was all there was to it.

That was when she heard the panicked voice. "No no no! Water bad! Water bad bad bad!"

Through the gaps in the waves, Carla could make out a lone figure in the middle of the pool, balancing precariously on a surfboard. He was a skunk, and quite a sorry skunk at that, marred with bald patches in his fur from head to toe. Similar to her, he was dressed only in a pair of black swim trunks with white trims, not counting what appeared to be a  _tame collar_  of all things wrapped around his neck. In complete defiance of his circumstances, a relaxing Pawaiian melody played over the speakers. "Is that the 'old friend'? I've never even met this guy before!"

Lucy lifted her shades, just so she could fake being genuinely surprised. " _Really? My bad. I guess I just assumed_ all  _of the Count's henchmammals were buddy buddy."_ Carla chastised herself for letting that get a growl out of her. " _I'll introduce you then. This is Harvey Montapue, former arsonist, current surfing champ. Hang six, bro!"_ Harvey kept babbling incessantly in response.

"Arsonist?" Carla mused. "So this is the nutjob who was lighting up all those buildings in the Rainforest District?" Come to think of it, she  _did_ know who this guy was. Nick had described him to her and Fangmeyer after the "incident" that left him stinking to high hell for the rest of the trip. Arsonist? Check. Skunk? Check. Certifiable? Check. They never did find the time to learn any more about him.

" _Yep! Sadly, Reynard found his talents rather limited, and his attitude problem didn't help. Word of advice: crying like a little bitch in front of your employer is not the best way to maintain job security. He's too unbalanced to be useful, so now he has to_ learn  _balance, or else that tame collar will zap him dead!"_

Carla was not concerned. "Yeah, I'm pretty sure those things are waterproof? How else was he burning buildings in the  _Rainforest_ District?"

" _Maybe it_ used  _to be, before I made some 'modifications'._ Now,  _it will instantly deliver a fatal shock if completely submerged in water."_ She tapped her chin. " _Which, come to think of it, seems like a way more effective method of controlling predators back in the day. They should've just had dunk stations on every corner if any stepped out of line."_

Carla's lip curled with genuine disgust. She had gotten used to the bat's casual sadism by now, but making tame collar jokes around predators was just  _sick._ "Wait...you have access to tame collars?"

" _Yeah?"_

"Why didn't you stick one of  _those_  on me?!"

" _Because if you kept zapping yourself every time you got too mad about something, we'd be here all day."_ She...kinda had a point. " _Besides, this is funnier."_ Lucy lifted her remote and pressed the button. Carla was on the floor in seconds, kicking and screaming with laughter as the Hoot Boots did their thing. " _See? Told ya!"_ She turned them off.

Carla was making it a personal challenge to recover from this faster each time it happened. She expected to break her record several more times before she got out of here.

" _Anyway, I wouldn't worry. Harv there doesn't have anything to do with_ your  _challenge. I'm just saving space by overlapping them."_

"Oh,  _right!"_ Carla snapped. "Do you think I'm an  _idiota?!_

" _Is that your second question? Because I'll answer it, but…"_

"You just  _happen_ to give me a suspiciously-easy challenge, that just  _happens_ to cut directly through  _this guy's_ challenge?! I know what's going on here! You just wanna see if I'll leave the skunk to die or not!"

Lucy made some kind of exaggerated shocked noise. " _Whaaaaaat? Nooooooo…"_

" _Last time,_ you were testing my ability to solve a problem without violence!  _This time_ , you're testing my morals, to see if I'll put the needs of a complete stranger before my own! You're not being subtle at all!"

" _Subtlety is overrated!"_ Lucy screeched, tossing her glass melodramatically to the floor. " _You think you've got me all figured out, don't you? Of_ course  _you're going to save him, right? That's what you're thinking? Well then, I bet_ this  _won't be an issue at all for you…"_

There was another loud whirring and Carla turned to her left, ready for whatever deathtrap the bat threw at her next.

Instead, a piece of the wall slid open and fresh air wafted inside.

The opening gave sight to a massive underground cavern. Judging from what she saw, Carla realized that the Belfry was located near the edge of the Nocturnal District, in a dark, quiet, run-down lot. But in the distance, she could see entire stone neighborhoods built into the cavern floor, and massive stalagmites topped with beacons lighting up the cavern ceiling, so vast it might have been a sky of its own. Gothic skyscrapers reached for the surface, and on the edges of the district, huddled against the cavern walls, factories and mining facilities were buzzing with activity. Up high above, a soothing blue light - millions upon millions of glowworms - could be seen pulsing through the clouds of mist that congregated around the pointy stalactites clinging to the roof, almost as though they were stars beaming against a cloudy nighttime sky. Crystals embedded into the cavern ceiling glimmered in the glowworm's light, speckling the rocks around them like a colorful kaleidoscope.

Carla's jaw nearly dropped. How could a place so infamously dark and crime-infested also be so beautiful?

And now it was right in front of her.

"...Oh."

* * *

_The Docks_

_S.S Blowhole_

_12: 52 AM_

This really was turning into quite the unusual investigation. Normally, the suspect was supposed to ride with the officers, not the other way around. But for the sake of getting things done and hopefully sleeping sometime before noon, they agreed to Smokey's request to sail out in his tugboat. It actually worked out pretty well, since they found it unlikely that he would try to bail overboard and leave them with his property. It was clearly of sentimental value to him, since it didn't appear to possess much value otherwise.

The S.S. Blowhole was showing its age, its grey paint rusted and peeling, its tow lines worn, its infrastructure cracked in multiple alarming places, and its steam engine, which itself was well obsolete, occasionally sputtering in a very unsettling manner. They frankly had no idea how the thing moved so smoothly, but it glided right across the water with no issues. Content that they at least didn't have to worry about their ride spontaneously sinking on them, the cops began their questioning.

It wasn't going very well.

"I'm just saying, if Narwhalter is being targeted by  _predators,_ and half of you are  _predators,_ then is it not logical for me to bar off all  _predators?"_ Smokey asked, remarkably comfortable around the cops despite the situation. "What are you guys even going to  _do_ if you get to see Narwhalter? Eat him first?"

"We're not going to eat him!" Nick insisted. "We want to  _help_ him!"

"Oooooooh, I guess I can let you through then! You've already done such a stand-up job protecting the  _rest_  of the crime lords that I know he'll be in safe paws!" He slow-clapped his flippers. "Arf. Arf. Arf."

"Ahoy, matey, I don't think this bilgerat is being genuine!" Jimmy pointed out. "Make 'em walk the plank!"

"I don't have a plank," Smokey said.

"No plank?! This sly seadog has outwitted us again!"

"Didn't you say that Narwhalter was your friend?" Judy asked, attempting an emotional approach as bunnies were wont to do. "Shouldn't you be doing anything you can to keep him safe?"

"Narwhalter doesn't  _need_ protecting," Smokey said, spitting onto his already filthy deck. "You have no idea what he's capable of. I trust in his abilities. I  _don't_ trust in yours."

Chief Bogo, who had been uncomfortably silent for most of this, finally sat up. "Well, I guess that's it then."

"Chief?" Judy looked back at him, shocked.

The buffalo's expression was stern. "To be honest, ever since I heard about what we were getting into going after Narwhalter, I had my doubts we'd even be able to talk to him, let alone protect him. And according to our new friend here, it won't make a difference anyway."

Judy looked to Nick and Jimmy, making sure that she wasn't the only one completely floored by this. She wasn't. "B-But, Chief, we can't just give up!"

"Why not? Have you forgotten who we're doing all this for?" he asked bitterly. "Piers Narwhalter. Not only a criminal, but a crime lord, one of the worst of the worst. You heard the seal, Hopps. Aside from Reynard, he's the only one left now. Maybe we should just let karma do its job and save the big guns for the fox himself."

 _He's not giving up. He just doesn't care._ Nick remembered the chief's words on the day of his suspension. How much he hated criminals, and how he especially couldn't stand them abusing the system for their own ends. He was also openly displeased with the arrangement they'd made with Sandcat Sanchez, agreeing to it only because it seemed like a good shot to catch his father, who he didn't even know about at the time. It occurred to Nick that he might've been too quick to think that he should bring along the chief of police to go rescue someone like Piers Narwhalter. "Can I say something?"

"You're going to whether I want you or not."

"Good point," Nick said, stepping forward. "What do you think would've happened to me if Carrots here decided I wasn't worth the trouble of saving? Because I can make a pretty good guess; it's out there right now swinging a cane around and spouting tired catchphrases. Carrots pulled me back from the brink, Chief. That's why I'm here, right now, trying to stop that which I could have very easily become."

"What are you saying? We help Narwhalter now and turn his life around later? It's too late for that."

He shrugged. "I thought the same about myself once, but it turned out all I needed was a bun in shining armor to smack some sense into me. Because she took the time to understand me and why I did what I did, when she could've just had me arrested for felony tax evasion."

Bogo squinted. "When did you commit felony tax evasion?"

"Don't change the subject. Sure, if we save Narwhalter, there's no guarantee that he's going to change at all, or even drop his stupid paranoid grudge against predators, but at least we've given him the  _chance_  to change. And if we  _don't_ save him, his resources are going to end up in my father's clutches, and we already know what  _he's_ going to do with them."

"Hmm." Bogo sat back down. "Alright, you've convinced me."

"Really?" Nick was actually surprised. "I didn't think I could pull off a speech like that."

"You didn't. You sounded like a damn musical. But from a purely logical standpoint, you made a better case for saving him over leaving him."

"I'll take it."

" _I_ thought it was good," Judy said, smiling as she hugged him around the waist. "I didn't know you felt that way. That was really sweet of you, Nick."

"No offense, Carrots, but you're kinda proving his point."

"For the record,  _I'm_ still not convinced," Captain Smokey said, crossing his flippers.

"Looks like we have no choice," Jimmy said seriously, stepping towards him. "We'll need to play good cop/bad cop to crack this perp. Wallace, take it away."

" _Excuse me, sir, we'd like to ask you some questions about Mr. Narwhalter."_

"And you'd better cooperate or we'll throw the book at you!" Jimmy growled.

"Why are  _you_ the bad cop?" Judy asked.

Nick whispered into her ear. "He finally stopped doing the pirate thing. Just roll with it."

"Ahoy thar! I believe ye lot have some booty I'd like ta plunder!"

That wasn't Jimmy.

A large shadow was cast over the S.S Blowhole in the light of the moon as a new ship approached its starboard. They were so engrossed in dealing with Smokey that they hadn't even noticed until it was right on top of them. "What is  _that?"_ Judy asked nervously.

Nick sniffed. "Smells like fresh irony, Carrots. And that can only mean one thing."

By all unlikelihood, their assailant appeared to be a giant, vintage pirate ship, painted completely black. Its sails were raised, showing off a jolly roger depicting the face of a very familiar fox grinning wickedly, while in place of the traditional crossbones were his cane and tie. As the ship pulled up alongside the S.S Blowhole, they could see its name written on the side in calligraphy: The Fine-Jailed Fox.

"Where does he get the time to make these things?" Judy asked, gaping.

"I have a lot of questions about what my father does," Nick said. "Honestly? That is not one of them."

* * *

_The Nocturnal District_

_The Belfry - Second Challenge_

_Decision Time_

" _Weeeeell? What's it gonna be, Carla?"_ Lucy prodded.

"Shut up, I'm thinking!"

It seemed so easy, so obvious of a choice before, but with an escape from this hellhole right in front of her, the temptation was definitely there. Carla bit her lip in uncertainty, looking back and forth between the open door and the pool room.

" _Muy bien!"_ said a little voice that sounded an awful lot like her. Carla looked down at her left shoulder, where there was suddenly a much smaller version of herself wearing a bright red devil costume. " _We barely have to lift a finger! Come on, let's blow this joint!"_

_Dios mio, I have finally snapped from the stress. Priscilla always warned me this would happen one day._

" _No! Don't you_ dare  _leave that poor zorrillo behind!"_ said another Carla on her right shoulder, dressed like an angel. " _He is in just as much pain as you are!"_

" _Yeah right! Just look at the guy! He probably doesn't even understand what's going on!"_ Devil Carla argued.

" _That may be so, but he still needs your help!"_

" _You don't have_ time  _to help! You need to get out of here right now and go find Priscilla!"_

" _And what would_ Priscilla  _think if she knew you abandoned another mammal for her sake?"_

Devil Carla scowled. " _That's below the belt."_

" _I play to win,"_ Angel Carla said smugly. " _Deal with it."_

" _RAAAAH!"_

And before Carla knew it, the two figments of her imagination were violently wrestling atop her head. It had an odd way of making her look back on the situation.

This wasn't really  _about_ Priscilla anymore, was it? It used to be. At one time,  _everything_ in her life had revolved around Priscilla, and the rest of the Rodentriguez family as well. They had adopted her, raised her, loved her, and she never felt like she had done enough to return the favor. That was why she had thrown herself into the police academy to avenge Priscilla, and why she had accepted Reynard's deal when she failed. Carla would do anything and everything at her disposal to protect them.

Even at the cost of her own morality.

That was her mistake.

And she wasn't going to make it again. "I'm taking the challenge."

" _Hah! Where's your Faustian fire now, puta?!"_ Angel Carla yelled triumphantly, putting Devil Carla into a headlock. The devil weakly patted her arm in a sign of surrender.

" _If you insist,"_ Lucy said. And the door to freedom slammed shut again. " _In case you were wondering, my offer_ was  _genuine. I was honestly willing to let you go just to see how badly you regretted it later."_

"I'm not going to have any more regrets," Carla said, smacking her fists together. "Now let me into that pool!"

" _Sure! Lucky for you, Harv is still alive after you left him in mortal peril for like ten minutes!"_

 _Okay, maybe_ one  _regret._

The mirror on the wall rotated again and stopped between sides, allowing Carla to enter the pool room through the gap.

The stench hit her like a piledriver. An overpowering blend of rotten eggs, chopped garlic, and burnt rubber that brought the hyena to her knees, both paws clamped tightly over her nose. "Huele como el noveno círculo del  _infierno!"_

" _What? Don't tell me you forgot what skunks do when they're frightened. I'm pretty sure this guy emptied his entire tank in here by now. Good luck!"_

And she thought it was bad when it was rolling off of Nick. Amplified and condensed in this enclosed space, it was ten times worse. Enough so that she was in serious danger of passing out if exposed for too long, which would be a death sentence out there. But she hadn't come this far just to be waylaid by a little stink, or even a lot of stink. Carla pulled one paw away from her nose and dove headfirst into the water.

Unsurprisingly, it was ice cold, but she'd dealt with worse in lucha training. It was the first time she'd ever tried to make such a swim with one arm though. Carla did it anyway, forcing herself through the water and the crashing waves as she made her way towards the stammering, surfing skunk.

"D-D-Deep breaths! Deep deep deep breaths!" Harvey struggled not to cry, his eyes shut tight and wobbling slightly as his collar stayed a solid yellow.

" _Poor kit!"_ Lucy chimed in. " _He's been in a mental hospital near all his life. I don't even know if he's aware of what's going on half the time. But eh, Reynard wanted him disposed of. Who am I to look a gift fox in the mouth?"_ Carla ignored her as usual and kept going, getting pretty close to him.

Unfortunately, Harvey was not only tuning out all of Lucy's announcements in his panic, he still remembered the words she'd given him when he started his challenge. " _Remember, just keep your eyes closed and the monsters in the water can't get you. If one of them gets brave, you'll hear them approaching. Skunk 'em."_ He did so now.

"AGGGH!" If Carla weren't already holding her nose, she was certain this latest blast would have knocked her out. What it  _did_  do was get in her eyes, making them sting terribly.

" _Oh, hey, I guess he_ did  _have another shot left! Who knew?"_

Enraged and half-blind, Carla screamed at him. "Eres una mierda estúpida! If you don't want me to save you, I'll leave right now!"

"Y-You're not not not gonna fool me!" Harvey said in a quavering, almost childlike voice. "I know what kind of scary things things things she keeps here!" His collar flickered to orange.

" _Better calm him down!"_ Lucy warned. " _That collar goes off and he's done for! Sure would stink stink stink to have given up your freedom for nothing nothing nothing!"_

Carla wished she could take a nice, deep breath right now. She really did. "Ugh...I'm sorry. My name is Carla. I'm here to rescue you. And I'm not a monster. Well, that's debatable, but I'm  _trying_ not to be."

"D-Don't come any closer! You might be that big quiet thing that hit hit hit me outside the hotel!"

"Do I  _sound_  like a quiet thing to you?" With her nose plugged, she sounded downright ridiculous actually, which she hoped would make her less threatening. "Look, it's been a really rough night for me, even before all of this. There's a lot of mammals who I let down, and they probably think the worst of me, but...I just want to prove that I'm better than that. Maybe that's what Nick really wanted himself." Who knew that this neurotic skunk was what she needed to bring it out into the open? "Harvey, was it? Can you please trust me? I really want to help you and anyone else stuck in here." Treading water as best she could, she turned around to show him her back. "If you let me come closer, you can climb aboard. I can save you. Please?"

Harvey hesitated, but slowly opened his eyes. "O-O-Okay."

She sighed in relief, then almost gagged on the stink. Good thing he was finally being cooperative because she wouldn't last much longer in here. "Great! Then come on!" Still treading water, she slowly approached the surfboard and its hapless rider, allowing him a platform to climb on. He hopped aboard, wrapping his arms around her torso. Aside from him having seemingly never trimmed his toeclaws, it was a comfortable arrangement for both of them. "Now let's get out of here."

"You bet bet bet!"

" _Pfffft! You didn't think I'd make it_ that  _easy, did you?"_  Lucy cut in sharply. " _Release the mechanical shark!"_

"A-A shark shark shark?"

"Relax, she's just screwing with us. There's no way she actually has a…" Carla heard a metal gate slide open somewhere deep below them. "Hold on tight, Harvey!" She began swimming frantically for the other side, still with one arm, while being careful to keep the skunk and his collar above the waves.  _Who the hell said this was_ easy?!

_Oh mierda. I did._

* * *

_The Docks_

_S.S Blowhole_

_1: 04 AM_

Everyone had a different reaction to seeing Count Reynard show up now.

Nick knew it was an inevitability, but he wasn't expecting it so soon. He also wasn't expecting to see this level of flamboyance from him again after the last time they'd met. Whatever had snapped him out of his funk, it was undoubtedly going to make him even more annoying to deal with.

Judy was still mad that he'd gotten the better of her back in the hospital, and was all the more determined to pay him back for the thwack on the head she'd gotten for her troubles. Marian's ex or no, she wasn't letting him anywhere near her again.

Jimmy had never actually met the old fox in person before, but everything he knew about him, plus some residual trauma from the Lady Lang incident, made him pretty sure he wasn't going to like him. And that was a little tragic, because Jimmy liked basically everyone.

Bogo was honestly kind of unimpressed.

So was Smokey.

So was Wallace.

Reynard himself was unsurprisingly decked out in pirate garb of his own, consisting of a black buccaneer coat, cotton pants, a wooden peg leg, and a giant hat with a feather of unknown origin sticking out of it. He withdrew his cane, sliding off the entire outer shell to reveal a shimmering sword underneath, which he pointed threateningly towards them. "I be Captain Long Con John! Scourge of your wallets! Terror of your…" He trailed off, his eyes narrowing not on Nick or Judy, but on Jimmy. "You ripping me off, Frosty?"

"I did it first!" Jimmy protested. " _And_ I have a parrot!" He pointed proudly at Wallace.

" _Kiss my tail feathers! Kiss my tail feathers! Squawk!"_

" _I_ have a  _ship!"_ Reynard snapped back. He sighed in frustration. "Forget it. I just got here and I feel like this gimmick has already run its course. I only got the leg to make fun of Peggy anyway. Just fork over Smokestack there and you won't get hurt."

"Go jump in the fake sea!" Smokey spat back. Meaning that he actually hocked a loogie in Reynard's general direction.

"Not a seal of approval, are you?" the fox chuckled. "That's okay. That just means the Discards will have to  _draw."_

"The  _what?"_ Nick asked.

"Come on out, everyone!" And onto the deck emerged several mammals they had never seen before.

" _Piper Piedmont!"_

"Must you call us that in public?" Piper asked, sitting atop her instrument case. "I might have to charge you extra for that."

" _The Vixens!"_

"Awwwwwww, girls, look at the little guy down there in the pirate costume! He is  _so_ adorbs!" Pearl squealed, Crystal and Opal quickly joining in.

"I am gonna, like, cuddle the  _shit_  out of him!"

"He is literally the cutest thing I've ever seen!"

Jimmy blushed profusely and tried to hide himself under his hat.

" _Drummond Rane!"_

"So are those the guys you want me to smash?" the wallaby asked, cracking his neck, knuckles, and tail. "You better be specific or I'm gonna just start smashing everything. Fair warning."

"Fast Tony."

"Get back here!" Finnick snarled, pulling the panicking wolf away from the railing as he attempted to jump overboard.

"You're not my mom!"

"Your mom is dead!"

"Who are  _these_  nutjobs?" Judy asked, more confused than concerned.

"Assassins," Bogo answered. "The deadliest in the city. I've had to handle some of their cases every now and then, but I've never seen them all together here at once. Except for that wolf. Not sure what he's about.

"Help meeeeeeeee!"

Judy remained confused. "Aren't assassins supposed to be quiet?"

"But that's not all!" Reynard announced. "I've added one more member to my crime family! Say hello, RJ!" He pushed aside his coat to reveal the Wallabeanie attached to his waist.

"What is  _that_ abomination?" Nick asked, more than a little disturbed by his miniature double.

"He's RJ!" Reynard answered, as if that explained everything. He reached down and grabbed the plushie, pulling it away from him and then releasing it, letting the pull-string yank it back.

" _Greetings, fellow mammals of the legally-adjacent variety, and welcome to my humble celebration!"_

"OW!" Reynard clutched his now bleeding paw. "I forgot about the stabbing part…"

"How did you give that thing  _my_ voice?" Nick pressed, still very unnerved.

"Trade secret," Drummond replied. He glanced down at the disguised wallabeanie on Jimmy's shoulder. "A Winter Warrior model. Good choice."

"Thanks!" Jimmy lifted up his hat to be polite, then hastily lowered it again when he saw the Vixens still staring at him.

"I've had enough of this." Bogo whipped out his tranq pistol and pointed it straight at the fox. "I guess I'm the only one who's going to say it, but you're all under arrest."

Reynard just rolled his eyes. "Right, because that worked out sooooo well for Twitchy there. I know you've been off the field for a while, Buy One Get Owned, but you and I both know that you're not going to shoot me."

"Wanna bet?" He held his hoof finger right over the trigger. "You're a gambler, right? You feeling lucky?"

"Luck has nothing to do with it," he said dismissively. "You can  _try_ to shoot me if that's how you get your jollies, but it's just going to miss, or your gun will jam, or something else contrived."

"He's right," Nick said. "Happens every time."

"Don't be ridiculous." Deciding he didn't need any more prompting given the scale of Reynard's crimes, Bogo fired.

Reynard swung his sword cane and cleaved the dart in two. One piece ricocheted back into the gun that fired it, shattering the weapon in Bogo's hooves. The fox threw up his arms in a "told ya so" gesture. "You see? I don't even know how I did that."

"He does have a point though," Piper said impatiently. "I've had enough of the dress rehearsal. Let's get on with the show!"

"And I've got places to be!" Smokey agreed, completely unconcerned.

"If you insist," Reynard said, lifting his sword. He swung it down in a signal of attack. "Fire the cannons!"

"This was just a set piece for a local show when we stole it!" Finnick yelled, still wrestling with Fast Tony. "The cannons are decorative!"

"Then fire the designer!"

"You know…" Smokey said to his passengers, "if you were waiting for an opportunity to get thedrop on those scoundrels, this would be it."

"So you can use that time to slip away from both of us?" Judy asked suspiciously.

"Are you kidding?" he laughed, pulling out a bucket of popcorn. "I'm not missing a second of this."

"Works for me," Nick said. "Every one of us has a score to settle with dear old Dad anyway. Now, does anyone know how we're getting up there? And don't ask  _me_  this time."

"I won't. I already have an idea," Bogo said, stretching his arms.

* * *

_The Nocturnal District_

_The Belfry - Second Challenge_

_Panic Time_

"Left left left! No, right right right! No no no, LEFT LEFT LEFT!"

"I see it, okay?!"

At first, only the dorsal fin was visible above the water, but as if responding to Carla's observation, the beast rose out of the depths behind them. It was the size of a large polar bear, made completely of metal and pursuing them with glowing red eyes. It had razor-sharp spikes for teeth that whirred like a chainsaw.

" _The Belfry would like to thank Dr. Wondertainment Incorporated for providing David the Robot Shark for this challenge,"_  Lucy announced. A recording that seemed to be some kind of word from the sponsor played in the background.

Carla chanced a look back and saw the horror quickly approaching. They would never make it to shore in time. But what was she supposed to do against a monstrosity like this? She couldn't even put Harvey's stink to use against a creature that didn't have a real nose!  _Wait...the nose...that's it!_ She waited until the beast was about to strike, then kicked out as hard as she could, plowing her booted foot square into the shark's snout. "Eat my spotted cula, David!"

David seemed very interested in doing just that, but the blow knocked him briefly off-balance, slowing him down. If Carla survived this, perhaps she could add fighting a mechanical shark to her resume of badassery. She considered making a break for shore now, but if David recovered before she got there, she was out of options. Only one thing left to try, and this was going to be even more recklessly stupid. Ignoring Harvey's protests, she turned and swam  _towards_  the shark, hooking herself onto David's dorsal fin and hoisting them onto his backside. Holding her breath, she finally removed her other paw from her nose and grabbed on tightly to the fin, steering the great beast towards shore.

With a tremendous crash, David slammed right into the lip, catapulting Carla and Harvey off of his back and through the exit door. Carla quickly got back up, rushing to the metal door and slamming it shut just as David made an attempt to lunge through it himself. Only then did she finally let out her breath, gasping for fresh air.

" _Whoa! Even_  I  _have to admit that was clever!"_ Lucy praised. " _Good on ya, traitor and torcher! Looks like you both made it through your second challenge!"_

"Hip hip hip hooray!" Harvey cheered, clapping weakly. "You still stink though."

"Don't even start," Carla growled. She turned her head towards the monitor now lowering into this new chamber, which looked almost exactly like the one she'd started in. Just to annoy her, presumably. "Alright, Sang, I've got another question for you!"

" _Shoot."_ She leaned forward eagerly.

Carla chose a different approach this time. Not information that could help her escape, but information that could be a huge asset once she  _did_ escape. "What is Reynard's master plan? I know there's more to it than just the crime lords, so what is he up to?"

" _I dunno."_

Harvey took a few steps away, instinctively sensing the explosion that was imminent.

"Are you  _serious?!_ " Carla screamed. "After that unreasonably huge history lesson you dumped on me last time, all you have for me now is ' _I dunno'?!"_

She shrugged, unsympathetic. " _Reynard doesn't like to share his secrets. I thought that after all the time you've spent working for him, you would know that by now. Better luck next time, Carla!"_

A loud booing echoed through the room.

Lucy reeled back. " _Huh? Guys, come on, you don't really want to hear me go on another long-winded monologue, do you? Can't we just leave it like this and move on?"_

The booing played again.

" _Alright, fine!"_ she submitted. " _I'll give her another chance, okay?!"_

The cheering played.

Harvey leaned over towards Carla and asked quietly, "Is it just me, or is she a little looney looney looney?"

" _Sounds like you've become a fan-favorite, Carla. Must be that atoning anti-hero schtick you're on now. So I'll give you a mulligan on this one. You may ask one more question, but this is your only freebie, so make it count this time."_

Carla didn't have another question lined up in advance, but at this point, one very quickly came to mind. "How did you build all of this shit anyway?"

She nodded approvingly. " _Now_ that,  _I can answer. I have three main sources of income actually. The first is my job as a professional thief, but I'm sure that doesn't surprise you."_

"Actually, I don't think I've ever seen you steal anything besides cell phones."

" _Oh, I steal_ lots  _of things,"_ she insisted. " _Money, jewelry, blood, lives…"_ She stopped herself there.

" _The second source...let's call it 'inheritance'. Both the familial kind, in a manner of speaking, and something I picked up from some old pals of mine. You ever heard of the Felidae Infernum?"_

"No?"

The bat giggled very loudly to herself. " _I swear, that gets funnier every time I ask."_

Carla just assumed she wasn't getting anything more there. "And the third source?"

Lucy smiled in a very unpleasantly-knowing way. " _Are you_ sure  _you want me to answer that?"_

Less sure than she was five seconds ago, but she refused to admit it. "Yes!"

" _The third source...is the Belfry itself! This thing is the most popular entertainment on Zootopia's dark web and crowdfunded straight to Hell!"_

Carla's eyes slowly widened as the implications sank in. "You mean...this 'show' you've been putting on…"

" _Is an actual, broadcast show, yes!"_ Lucy cheerfully confirmed. " _And your suffering has been raking in tons of viewership for me! The audience loves you! But to be fair, the bikini probably helps."_

A wolf whistle clip played in agreement.

" _Perfect timing, guys."_

Carla gasped, picking up Harvey and trying to cover herself with him. "H-How many?!"

" _Only a few hundred,"_ Lucy said, " _but I doubt you really care about the specifics. There's a lot of sick mammals in Zootopia, Carla Hyenandez, some much worse than me. The only difference is that most of them don't have the money, resources, or balls to do anything but fantasize about their darker desires. That's why they tune in to see debauchery like every week on the same bat time, same bat channel. Just be thankful it isn't viewer request week. Some of these guys have been suggesting challenge ideas that make even me a little nauseous."_

Lucy shook her head and chuckled at the thought. " _That should answer your second question. I was able to build all of this shit because of mammals like me who get a kick out of it. Hey, you're right, guys! That_ was  _more fun!"_

More cheering.

" _What about you, Carla? Are you satisfied now?"_

At one time, Carla might've expressed her grievances by throwing Harvey forcefully at the monitor. But she was better than that now. So she put the skunk down and leapt up to punch a large crack in it instead. " _Hey, that was expensive! That screen is coming out of your sanity fund!"_ Though her image was now distorted, Carla could clearly see Lucy raising her remote and pressing the button.

"What what what's so funny?" Harvey asked, very confused by the hyena now laughing psychotically next to him. "Ooooooh, are you trying to emphasize with me? That's really really really nice of you!" Harvey promptly joined in, letting out the kind of maniacal laugh he used while watching a particularly big blaze.

Lucy just watched the two of them laughing their cares away for a while. " _That is adorable. Grunt, break 'em up!"_

"Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha huh?" Harvey was abruptly punched across the room. The skunk collided with a wall and crumpled to the floor, unconscious.

"HahahahaHarvey?" Carla struggled to open her eyes, fighting the influence of the still-active Hoot Boots. She saw the culprit standing above her, a humongous, black-robed, gas-masked Giraffrican elephant who nearly scraped the ceiling. She had no idea how Lucy even fit him in here. The elephant silently raised a meaty fist above her head. Carla could do nothing to stop him in her current state, so she was content to try laughing herself into unconsciousness before he could do it first. That would show him.

" _Wait!"_ Lucy ordered. " _I wanna see how this plays out."_ She turned off the boots.

Despite being the longest she'd been under the effects yet, Carla still broke her record and shook it off. "I don't know...who you are...but I just...took down...a lion... _and_ a mechanical...shark, so...I suggest...you back off...before I shove that trunk where the sun don't shine, you ugly cabrón!"

The strange elephant did not respond, just looked towards Lucy's monitor expectantly.

" _Eh. Not as good as I was hoping. You can take her out now."_

He nodded, raising one arm and bringing it down almost casually onto Carla's head. The hyena, weakened from exertion, forced laughter, and prolonged exposure to skunk spray, was out before she could come up with any more colorful insults.

" _Great job, Grunt! Now get them hooked up with Grumpy Gus before they come to. We're getting a real party forming here, and I can't wait to celebrate!"_

The cheering played.

* * *

_The Docks_

_The Fine-Jailed Fox_

_1: 16 AM_

"I'm just saying, if you're gonna go through the trouble of building an authentic pirate ship, at least give it the ability to lay waste to its enemies! What are we, the pirates who don't do anything?!" Reynard continued ranting at his less-than-attentive hired help until his ear suddenly twitched. "Hey...if we don't have cannons, what's that gradually-increasing whistling noise?"

And then Judy landed a flying kick to Reynard's face. "It's called  _payback,_ sweetheart!"

Reynard flew back, rolled along the deck, and hit the railing on the other end. He shook his head free of dizziness. "Hey, you can't jump that high, Twitchy! Stop cheating!"

But Judy wasn't the only one. Right behind her, Nick, and then Jimmy, also flew up onto the deck. "I gotta admit, you really do have a good throwing arm, Chief," Nick said.

Bogo rolled out his arm, stretching the muscles. "I should. I was a football coach for a while before I joined the force."

_That explains a lot._

"Good plan, but how are  _you_ getting up there?" Smokey asked.

"I have my ways." He looked over his shoulder to glare back at the portly seal. "But you had better not be lying about sticking around."

"Why, of course not!" He sat up and placed a flipper over his chest. Bogo could practically see a halo.

He just snorted and leapt over the side of the boat, grabbing onto the side of the Fine-Jailed Fox before he hit the water. It wasn't an easy feat to climb, but the ice wall back at the academy was still worse. Bogo grunted with exertion as he scoured the side of the ship and soon reached the top as well.

The second he was out of sight, Smokey hopped into his cabin and started fiddling with the control console. "C'mon...wake up...wake up!"

Up on deck, Reynard recovered quickly and approached the group of four. "Don't you mammals have any respect for the way things are done? We're the pirates here.  _We're_ supposed to be the ones boarding." He shook his head. "Fine, be that way. Discards, assemble!"

" _Please_ stop calling us that!" Piper said, raising her instrument case and blocking another kick from Judy as the rabbit attacked her. "Not even bothering with the darts anymore, I see." She clicked the case open and dropped it, pulling out a recorder and putting it to her lips. "That makes one of us, darling!"

Judy jumped back as a salvo of colorful darts hit the deck in front of her feet, making her skip away to avoid them. She was happy she did when she saw them hiss and dissolve the wood of the deck. "It's already poison! That is  _seriously_ overkill!"

"Then it's a good thing my managers only care about underkill," Piper replied, blowing another stream of darts at her.

This next volly came dangerously close, one snagging the hem of her skirt, one flying between her ears, and another that would have nailed her in the foot had she not strategically spread her toes. Deciding that she couldn't let Piper take a third shot, Judy threw herself forward, cartwheeling a few times to close the gap between them just as Piper raised the recorder again. She kicked straight up and knocked the weapon out of her grasp. "How dare you! The opening act dictates everything!"

The deadly recorder spun a few times through the air until it landed in the paws of Opal. She quickly tossed it aside, finding Jimmy much more interesting. So did her sisters that surrounded him from two other sides, forming a triangle. "Do you wanna know what we're literally gonna do to you?"

The fox looked nervously back and forth, wondering why he couldn't have been paired up with the guy who liked Wallace. He seemed cool. "Uh...I feel like I should say no, but I'm too curious not to say yes."

Pearl and Crystal sidled up next to him and whispered into his ears. Jimmy whimpered. "I need an adult."

"We  _are_ adults," they purred.

Jimmy let out a panicked squeak and took off just as they all jumped him at once, crashing into each other. He sped away on all-fours with the Vixens in hot-guy pursuit.

His panic route just so happened to lead directly towards the struggling Finnick and Tony. "Would it kill you to actually participate?!" Finnick yelled, maintaining a death grip on Tony's tail as he scrambled over the side.

"YES!" he cried, desperately trying to escape the wrath of karma.

But karma found its own way to handle things. The screaming Jimmy tore past them, followed by the Vixens, causing Finnick to momentarily lose his focus as he stared at them with a combination of fear and lust. In the confusion, Tony finally wriggled out of his grasp and threw himself overboard. Finnick watched as the wolf frantically swam for shore. He was about to jump in after him, until he remembered that he didn't actually care. "He's never gonna make it anyway."

The fennec shrugged and strolled casually across the deck, not really intending on participating himself. He paused for only a second as Chief Bogo was thrown onto the floor in front of him. "Hey, how's it feel to see me walking around again?" he asked mockingly.

"Very temporary," Bogo answered, casually backhoofing the fox as he got back up, focused on his real opponent.

"Don't pick a fight you can't win!" Drummond Rane boasted, taking to the air and attempting to crash down on him. Bogo dove out of the way, but the impact threw the still-dazed Finnick across the deck. "You don't even have your flimsy weapon anymore!"

Bogo punched him in the jaw. "You think I became chief only because of my marksmanship?"

"Ah, a real challenger! Then let's battle like mammals!" Drummond shot back into him with a kick that drove Bogo all the way into the wall of the cabin.

He caught it anyway, and threw the wallaby back, then lifted a nearby barrel of prop weapons and chucked that at him as well. "Though I don't mind fighting dirty either!"

Drummond just raised an arm and let the barrel break over his fist, scattering its contents everywhere.

One of these was a toy sword that slid over to Nick, just in time for him to pick it up and block a slash from Reynard's sword cane. "Give it up, Dad! You're not getting away with this anymore!"

"You sound pretty smug for someone on the losing side," he countered, shoving him back and moving in again with a thrust. "The score's 4-0, son! Once the Great Horndini is out of the way, my empire will be complete!"

Nick sidestepped and parried the blade, countering with a flurry of physical and verbal strikes that drove Reynard back. "What about  _me?_  Do you still think there's any chance of me becoming your heir? Why are you even doing this anymore? How long do you think this empire of yours will last?!" He finished by landing a blow to Reynard's side that might have seriously injured him if it weren't just a piece of unsharpened metal alloy.

"Long  _enough."_ He shot back up with a kick to Nick's gut, then swung his blade towards his neck, stopping inches away. "It seems we're at an impasse. I can't hurt you, and you can't hurt me."

"I wouldn't be so sure about that," Nick said. "Have I mentioned that I hate your guts and it's your fault Mom got shot?"

Reynard stiffened in shock, giving Nick the opening to duck away from his sword and attempt to bash him over the head with the blunt end of his. Even a prop could take him out like that.

But the older fox blocked the attack, grinning in that same, self-assured way that he usually did. "Nice try, but I've heard that one before!" he taunted, sweeping Nick's legs out from under him along with his strategy. Reynard had the tip of his sword pointed at his throat before he could recover.

Nick stared up at him, stunned.  _No way. How could he have gotten over this so quickly? Unless...he's even more like me than I thought._

"Coming through!"

A panicked Jimmy Frost dashed right through the space between Reynard's sword and Nick's prone form, both knocking Reynard back and stomping on his mentor's chest in the process. This was quickly followed by Pearl, Crystal, and Opal doing the same.

" _So_ sorry!"

"Excuse, like, me!"

"Literally life or death here!"

"Leave me alone!" Jimmy screamed, scampering for dear life across the deck. "I don't want anything you're selling!"

"No worries, this is, like, on the house for  _you,_ cutie!"

" _Watch out! They're driving a hard bargain!"_ Wallace warned.

The Vixens skipped after him cheerfully, hopping to a tune only they could hear.

A desperate Jimmy threw himself onto the ship's rigging and began to climb up. The Vixens changed tactics in response, remaining on the deck and starting to hurl knives at the ropes, strategically cutting away at the ties that held him up. Jimmy looked down uneasily at the amorous trio, only to find that they were now a duo. He looked back and saw the third staring him in the face from the other side of the ropes.

Jimmy screamed again, and might have fallen off in shock if Opal didn't already have her fingers and toes intertwined with his own. She pulled him back in so they were nose to nose, smiling. "Hi there!"

He gulped. "H-Hi…"

"Don't freak out so much! We literally just wanna get to know you better!"

Knives continued to whiz past his head. "Somehow not reassuring."

"I'm Opal! What's your name?" the perky fox asked.

" _Don't tell her! She'll steal your soul!"_

"It's...J-Jimmy…"

"Hi, Jimmy!" She somehow managed to get her tail around his as well. "Do you know anything about massages?"

"N-No?"

"Do you know anything about distractions?"

"Plenty, but what does that have to do with-AAAAAAAAAAH!" The ropes were severed as Jimmy fell back towards the deck. Pearl and Crystal caught him while Opal landed on top. And then the cuddling began, screams quickly drowned out by squees.

Judy was distracted by this disturbing scene only for a second before she had to duck a kick from Piper. The cheetah had four cymbals strapped to her arms and legs, each lined with blades that could easily slice her to ribbons if she wasn't careful. Forming both shields and deadly melee weapons, it was a surprisingly solid defense despite looking like something a band student might throw together whilst drunk. "Dance to my ballad of blades!" she chanted, attacking Judy with an intricate combination of swings and kicks.

It was a dangerous assault, to be sure, but compared to Simon's cold professionalism, this was almost comical. Judy's speed and agility were enough to keep her out of harm's way, dodging, jumping, and rolling around the blades, but she still got a few cuts, not helping her recovery at all, and she still had trouble getting through Piper's defenses. She also had the distinct impression that, befitting her opponent's feline nature, she was only being toyed with. Silly as she was, the name Melodía was feared for a reason.

Judy leapt in and attempted a kick at her unprotected ankle, but Piper stepped out of her range and blocked with the shielded leg, then brought both arms down to smash her head between them. Judy jumped over them, causing the cymbals to make a loud clang as they clapped together, and kicked Piper in the chin. She stumbled back a bit from the blow, but was barely phased. "Nothing hurts more than rejection, darling."

Piper reached into her instrument case and pulled out a massive, steel-lined guitar. "But this comes pretty close!" Before Judy could react, she was reminded that cheetahs, and not rabbits, were the fastest land animal when a spotted blur was suddenly right in front of her and swinging the guitar into her face.  _Great. She really_ was  _toying with me._

Judy went flying across the deck, intercepted only when Drummond smacked her out of the air. "Do not interfere, girlie! This is a duel!"

A charging Bogo slammed into him, horns first, seconds later. "No one beats up on my officers but  _me!"_ He uppercutted Drummond into the air, grabbed him, then slammed him straight through the deck, creating a wallaby-shaped hole. "And before anyone else calls me New Carla, that was  _not_ a wrestling move!"

Not caring about the distinction, Drummond burst back through the deck, needlessly creating  _another_ wallaby-shaped hole, and kicked Bogo away. The chief landed on his hooves, charged back in, and the two began to exchange blows, hooved fists and powerful paws hitting home back and forth, but neither giving in.

Bogo might've been tempted to call it an even fight, except that Drummond hit like a freight train and seemed just as impossible to slow down. Soon enough, the Outbacker took the upper paw again and double-kicked Bogo into the ship's mast, audibly cracking it. "You put up a good tussle, mate, but it's over! Surrender now and I might just make a Wallabeanie in your honor!"

Coughing up blood, Bogo rested one hoof on the back of the mast. "Screw your honor." He then put his last bit of strength into breaking the support the rest of the way.

Everyone else on the deck looked up in horror as the entire mast began to collapse, crashing down straight towards Drummond. It was only a modest relief when the wallaby leapt up and kicked it back, causing it to reverse direction and fall down on top of a shocked Bogo instead. Drummond hopped over to where the cape buffalo was now trapped under the main support, shoving him back down before he could even think of trying to escape. Bogo was more annoyed than afraid. "Has anyone ever told you that you are  _grossly_ overpowered?"

"It's come up at parties, yes."

"Why do you think I wanted him?" Reynard laughed from across the way, before turning his attention back on Nick.

The younger fox had slipped away before, but not without cost, as Reynard being knocked away had caused his sword to inadvertently cut a gash across his son's chest in the process. "You see what happens when you make me hurt you?" he asked calmly.

"I've dealt with worse," Nick said with a shrug, lifting his sword again. " _Also_  because of you, FYI."

"I'm glad you know how to take your lumps, son." Reynard abruptly moved back into his range and attempted a feint that Nick saw through, parrying the real strike, followed by several more. "Because at this rate, I might have to go full Darth Reyder and lop off your paw to get you to listen!"

Nick's foot came down on a particularly loose board. "As awesome as a metal paw would be,  _no thanks!"_ He stomped hard, causing the other end of the board to fly up at Reynard. The old tod saw it coming and dodged, as Nick knew he would, which was why he used the diversion to duck under his blade again and target Reynard's peg leg.

His prop sword couldn't do any serious damage to the fox himself, but it was more than enough to topple the fake leg out from under him, tripping Reynard onto his backside. "Ugh. Maybe it  _is_ possible to take a joke too far sometimes…"

In a reversal from earlier, Nick was soon on top of him with his sword at Reynard's throat. "Can you just make this easy for once and give up quietly?"

"Why would I do that? I already won."

"What are you…?" Nick looked around, quickly realizing that he was the lucky one in this encounter. Judy was pinned down under a massive guitar wielded by Piper, Jimmy was tangled in ropes and being mercilessly snuggled by the Vixens, and Bogo was still stuck under practically the entire top half of the ship. "Oh."

"I never said I was a professional fencer, Nicholas.  _These guys_ are the pros. I just kinda assumed that if we were all to pair off like this, it would end up with you and me again. Call it a hunch," Reynard explained smugly. "But I know you hate my complicated schemes, so let's make this really simple. Get your pet sea captain up here and you and your friends can leave."

Nick wanted to scream.  _Outfoxed by him again! Right when I thought we were actually getting somewhere!_

A gruff voice laughed. "You're talking about me, right? Well, why didn't you say so? I'm right here!"

The voice was unmistakably Smokey's, but it wasn't coming from behind them, or in front of them, or even anywhere on the ship. Smokey was still aboard the S.S Blowhole, plainly visible off the port side. Which, considering that would require it to be level with the deck of the Fine-Jailed Fox, should have been impossible.

"Sorry for the wait, everyone!" the seal called. "I just had to wake up my friend here! She really likes to doze off at the most inopportune times!"

Judy groaned as she looked up from under the guitar. " _She?_ Do you mean the ship?"

"In a sense," Smokey replied. "Let's show 'em what we're all about, Bella!"

To the astonishment of everyone on board, the S.S. Blowhole rose even higher, so that they could now see underneath it.

The tugboat wasn't floating.

It was being lifted.

By a giant blue whale whose name was apparently Bella. "Now, 'old on tight, everyone!" came a heavily-accented voice. "Unless you are one of zose brutes, in which case,  _dégage!"_

The ship suddenly lurched as Bella slammed into it, making the Discards wobble a bit, but only actually knocking over Nick. "Well, that worked out nicely!" Reynard taunted, using his cane as it was actually meant to be used for once and propping himself back up, then once again stepping on top of Nick.

"Yes, it did!" Bella's voice agreed, turning the S.S. Blowhole and her whole body to show a raised tail. It stayed there just long enough to frighten them, then moved away from the ship and crashed down into the water instead.

No one escaped the resulting wave, but only those not pinned down got the worst of it.

"Call meeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" Opal cried as she and her sisters were swept off of Jimmy. The fox sputtered and quickly pried himself out of the rigging.

"Looks like this performance is a washout!" Piper yelled, tumbling off of Judy and across the deck, her cymbals loudly banging all the while. Judy kick-jumped back up in a very Simon-esque fashion.

"One-liners are for pussies!" Drummond shouted as he too was knocked over. Coughing from the water in his throat, Bogo finally managed to extricate himself from under the mast.

"Oh, fox  _this!"_ Lastly, Reynard was thrown off of Nick and back into the railing, this time with enough force to send him straight overboard, screaming all the while and snagging RJ's pull-cord in the process.

" _Welp. I had a good time."_

"OW!"

_*SPLASH*_

A soaking Finnick staggered to his feet and looked briefly over the side, until he remembered that he still didn't actually care.

"Don't just stand there, come on!" Smokey shouted as Bella moved the S.S. Blowhole back into position next to the Fine-Jailed Fox. The cops didn't need any convincing and hauled tail back over the railing and onto the tugboat, only feeling slightly weird about it now in face of the alternative.

"Is everyone 'ere?" Bella asked.

They all nodded for a second, not remembering that the whale couldn't actually see them. "Uh...yes, ma'am!" Judy said politely.

"Good! Then let's get going!" Bella nearly knocked them over again as she turned the whole boat around and fled. After taking the time to give the neighboring ship a friendly whack hard enough to ensure it wouldn't be following them, that is.

The maiden voyage of the Fine-Jailed Fox was also its twilight cruise. What was once an impressive vintage pirate ship was now splintered in half and sinking into the depths amidst the panicked shouts of its former crew. "The show committee can send me the bill," Smokey said. "Though getting me to actually pay it will be another story. One that ends with tears."

"I feel good enough about what just happened that I'm not even going to hold that against you," Bogo replied. "Just as long as you start cooperating now…"

"Sure, sure! I guess I owe you guys one!"

"Wait, but  _you_ saved  _our_ butts," Jimmy pointed out.

"True!" the seal laughed. "But that was the most entertaining thing I've seen in years! Action! Comedy! Girls! You guys really know how to make an old sea dog feel young again, and for that, I'll grant you a shot at meeting Narwhalter! Not too shabby, eh?"

"Yes, thank you, sir!" Judy said giddily.

But not nearly as giddy as Nick, who without warning, started laughing uproariously. Everyone stared at him, looked to each other, then back at him again, but Nick wasn't showing any signs of slowing down as his laughter just got louder and more manic the longer they listened to it. "We didn't grab the wrong Wilde, did we?" Bogo whispered.

Minutes passed before, at last, Nick stopped, just plopping himself down right on the spot and letting out a contented sigh. "You okay there, buddy?" Judy asked, a bit amused herself.

" _Finally,"_ Nick said, smiling so wide that it was a bit disconcerting. "After all the schemes, all the lies, all the manipulations. After coming up short time and time again, getting meaningless half-victories, or playing right into his paws. After being one step behind him the entire time since we've started...we beat him." He was almost crying. "We  _beat_ him!"

* * *

_Shantytown_

_1: 28 AM_

Far away from the wreckage, a lone wolf scrambled up a ladder and flopped onto the dock, coughing and gasping with exertion. After a few moments, Fast Tony managed to get up onto all-fours and shake the water out of his fur and suit as best he could, then weakly stood back up.

The first thing he noticed was the ship sinking in the distance. Not that he was the only one, as there were several passerby also pointing out, and taking pictures of, the vanishing vessel. Everyone was apparently under the assumption that it was all a big publicity show. Why anyone would hold such a show at this ungodly hour was a question that no one bothered to ask. But to Tony, the sight brought a special kind of significance: freedom.

"Woohooooo!" he cheered. "That's what you get for thinking you could keep  _Fast Tony_ prisoner! Thought you could get rid of me, did ya? Well, look who's laughing now! Ha! Ha! HA!" Already, he was thinking of ways he could spin this story into a tale of great bravery and escape from corruption.

A clawed finger tapped him on the shoulder, making Tony jump and instantly change his tune. "H-Hey there, R-Reynard. Have a n-nice s-swim?"

"I'm not Reynard."

He sighed in relief, slowly turning around. "Good! I was really worried for a second that-OH GOD, YOU'RE SO MUCH WORSE!"

"Hello again, Tony." Felix Dire Senior lifted the smaller wolf off of the ground with one paw and narrowed his eyes. "We need to have a  _long_ talk about your loyalties…"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's been a lot of chapters that turned out longer than expected. This may be the first that actually turned out shorter. We were seriously prepared to top 23 as the longest chapter so far, but just because a lot happens, that doesn't mean it takes a lot of words apparently. Of course, that's all relative when our first chapter was like 3K.
> 
> Here we have the official introduction of Eric Badge and Delilah O'Possum, co-stars of our eventually-gonna-happen crossover fic "Badge and O'Possum: Ace Attorneys." And for once, this isn't just a gratuitous cameo as we shall soon see in Drabble 8. (Yes, incentive to actually read Drabbles, oh my!) Both characters belong to Mind Jack.
> 
> We also get our first real look at the Docks, one of the most underappreciated unused locations it seems. The only other fics we've seen to feature the place are "In Darkness I Hide" and, surprise surprise, "When Instinct Falls". It's just surprising given the sheer potential of marine mammals. Potential that we, naturally, mercilessly, exploited. Captain Sam Smokey is owned by Jack. Bella Bleu is owned by me.
> 
> Carla's second challenge features the return of the surprisingly-popular Harvey Montapue, who a number of people have noticed went conspicuously missing long before Finnick pointed it out. In case you needed more proof, Reynard's kind of a dick. Grunt is owned by Jack. Shoutout to Upplet for the description of the Nocturnal District at the end of the first scene.
> 
> All of this leading into the significance of that big naval battle. Despite Nick emotionally destroying his father for a while back in Chapter 21, which did nothing to actually stop Sanchez's death, it's safe to say that our heroes have never really scored an unconditional win against Reynard before now. And what better district to watch the tides turn?


End file.
